Farmgirl Paints

the perfect storm

noreply@blogger.com (Farmgirl Paints) — Fri, 24 May 2013 14:13:00 +0000

I really should be packing...or cuffing or any number of things, but I had this on my heart and I just needed to share. Yesterday was a doozy. It started with my little chick getting a horrific nosebleed right as she was getting on the bus. Blood was dripping everywhere. The bus was idling...kids were staring. She was bawling. You get the drift. Adrenaline was flowing, came home from that a little stressed, but you know it's life stuff. You brush it off. You take a deep breath and you go onto the next thing.

BUT the next thing was a little more stressful. Our main water line to the house busted, and after hours of being gone I came home to about 3 inches of standing water in the storage area of our basement. Honey was out of town. I couldn't find the shut off valve. Water was gushing everywhere. I ran barefoot to our neighbors house in a panic. I put the pipes together the best I could, holding on with every ounce of strength I had while she frantically looked for the shut off valve. Thankfully the spec house across the street had all the contractors there meeting for some reason. I had her run and get a man! He calmly shut it down and had our builder and a plumber there within minutes. It was such a God thing.

We had damage. Our carpet got saturated and will need repaired or replaced. We lost a few things. We had a restoration company come in and do what they do. It will all be okay. It's only stuff. Through it all I couldn't help but think of Oklahoma and what they are going through. I'm sure they are sad about their stuff, but I can with all honesty tell you their focus isn't on the loss of their things...it's counting their blessings. If they made it with their people alive THAT is what they are thinking about. Stuff is stuff. You realize really quick what matters and NONE of this does.

There are days that present as a perfect storm. Every little thing that could go wrong does, but as I was laying in bed last night I could see God's provision through it all.

At the bus someone had wetwipes.

The contractors were there and had it under control within minutes.

We are going out of town this weekend. If it would have been one more day our entire house might have had to be gutted and we would have lost all those memory boxes etc...

Just the thought of that brings me to my knees with gratitude. God is good...even when it seems unfair or crappy. He's there in those dark, hard moments. I can't imagine facing these things...these everyday hiccups without Him.

Be a blessing.

restoration people
my precious neighbor who spent hours helping me move stuff out
provision
the chance to regroup and start over

kindness matters

noreply@blogger.com (Farmgirl Paints) — Thu, 23 May 2013 11:00:00 +0000

I woke up last week alone on my birthday. Honey was out of town. It was just me at the crack of dawn...laying there with my thoughts. It gave me a minute to let it soak in. I'm 40! I hit that mile mark. A new decade...

It was so funny the night before as I was saying goodnight to my honey I was like this is the last time you'll hear my voice in my 30's. And as I tucked the girls in I reminded them, this is the last night you'll see your momma in her 30's. HA! I surprise myself. I really didn't think I would be so affected by a number, but I was. I felt the change. Not the aging part, but the throttle forward. That actual propelling...weird!

Anyway I wasn't going to write a post about my birthday. It's been a week. I said my blanket thank you's to my facebook, IG friends and sweet blog readers. I didn't really want to focus on it anymore, but my people went to so much trouble to make me feel special that I can't just skip over it. SO these pics are just a small tidbit of that.

I've been going through a little pity party lately. Feeling lonely here. Feeling isolated. And most of that revolves around my work and honey's work. I was missing my "tribe" in MN...you know that group of women to run around with. That feeling of belonging. A sense of home (family) here.

Then recently I really felt the Lord, almost put His hand on my shoulder and whisper to me that I have LOTS of friends. I'm seriously blessed beyond measure with amazing women who LOVE me! ME...just the way I am.

Sometimes we have our needs met, but it just doesn't look the way we think it should. They may not all live here. I may not see most of them daily or face to face very often. An occasional phone call, text or email is just the way it has to be, but I'm surrounded by love. I need to focus on what I do have. And what I do have IS a TRIBE!

God has put all sorts of women in my path. And it astounds me actually that I have peeps in all corners of this world. He has placed each one of them in my circle for a reason. They each fulfill a different role and minister to me in different ways. Even some of you whom I've never met in person mean the world to me! How crazy is that!! My cup runneth over.

I'm reveling today in the fact that kindness matters greatly. That receiving love is a humbling thing...an overwhelming gift. One that I hope I can reciprocate to all the precious women in my life.

Thank you all so much for investing in me. For cheering me on. For joining my tribe. Together we courageously swipe on the warpaint of life:)) So glad I'm not alone...never alone.

Be a blessing.

friends that sneak and plot

feeling overwhelmed by hourly love on my bday...towel found here

owl cupcakes that were a labor of love

liza's advice;)

God's gentle reminders

the gift of another year
for a nation that rallys...praying for you oklahoma!

living in the extraordinary

noreply@blogger.com (Farmgirl Paints) — Mon, 20 May 2013 16:59:00 +0000

Okay friends this is the last of them. I'm wrapping it up...sob! I've got to get my San Fran thoughts down or they'll be gone forever.

So I'm left handed. You need to know this about me, because it has a lot to do with my personality. I'm a right brain thinker. I'm adventurous. I'm creative. There's really not much I wouldn't like to see or explore. I'm artsy, empathic, very in touch with my emotions...I see the BIG picture...I pursue transcendence (according to the internet). What is transcendence you may ask?? Free dictionary defines it as Being above and independent of the material universe. Used of the Deity. Whoa I like that. That's what I want...transcendence. I want to be used of the Deity;)

Our pastor is doing a series on being extraordinary. I bring all this up because he's been talking about the differences in the right and left brain. He's been talking about transcendence. It's been really eye opening. I'm taking notes and I just can't write fast enough. More on that in a minute...

Our first experiences in San Fran weren't that great. When we first touched down we were all tired, hungry and grouchy... that's just not a recipe for anything good to happen. I would be the first person kicked off the island on Survivor...just ask my friends. My basic needs have to be met or else;)

So we finally get into the city and go to a place the counter attendent at the rental car place suggested we eat. We went round and round the block trying to find parking. Then when we did finally find a spot it was metered and we had no change. They have a handy app for that now, but it was taking a LONG time to figure out, and meanwhile it was kind of a shady area and you get the picture. Tension was high. Stomachs were growling among other things.

And then the sniffing started. Snif, snif...SNIF!!! My little chick unfortunately got sick the second we got there. OH MY! I felt panicky inside. She's sick and we're in a city, and I don't know where a doctor is and this sniffing constantly is going to drive me nuts and our trip is NOT going the way I want and waaaaaaaa....

So that was the first few hours. In dire need of a nap we did just that. We checked into our room, curled up like babies and slept it off. After our little siesta we quickly put on our comfy shoes and took off to explore the city.

Little did we know how much walking we'd actually be doing. Our hotel was downtown by the square. We took off thinking we'd just hop a trolley and make it down to the touristy stuff...the pier and the wharf. We walked and walked and walked...and every time a trolley would pass it would the wrong one.

Then we stood and waited and waited for one and it seemingly would never come, so we took off walking again;) And if you've been to San Fran you know it wasn't an easy walk. It was STEEP hills and some serious cardio.

But along the way we saw the crooked street and lots of pretty homes and interesting people. We walked through parts of Chinatown. Then not knowing how far we had left we finally hopped on the trolley...paying big bucks and then all of a sudden we were there. It was almost comical. Oh well. That's the joys of vacation. You really don't know what to expect...where to go or exactly WHAT is a must see. That's the frustrating part.

I'll tell ya right now I'm not a city girl...none of my family members are either. We love wide open spaces...a slower pace. BUT it was really cool to see it in person. The old charming buildings, the bay...the BRIDGE.

I can visualize it all now and that's a cool thing.

The Wharf...lots of people watching.

Alcatraz...we didn't tour it. Thought it would be too much for the girls.

Did I mention it was chilly?

Pier 39 and the sea lions.

Boudin's sourdough bread place...my favorite thing at the Pier.

Then we hopped the trolley car back to the hotel. This was my favorite part of that day. The city just glowed and took on a whole different look. It was beautiful.

And then the next day the grouch cloud finally lifted and we set off to explore the Golden Gate Bridge. And I have to tell ya it was surreal on so many levels. We are talking giant bucket list item here:) And just like that it was checked!!!

I literally could have stayed on the bridge all day. The cars roaring by. The wind whipping our clothes and hair. The vibrating of the bridge under our feet. The view! The realization that we were standing on something I'd seen countless times...that I'd always wanted to drive over. It was magical.

After we walked the bridge, we set off for Vista Point. My girl Carissa kept me in the know and told us it was a must see and boy was she right. It was breathtaking.

I love that the girls have had these experiences. That we've shared these bucket list things with them. It makes me happy to my toes that they want to capture every moment and photograph as much as I do;) It's such a priceless gift to pass onto them. One that will make them view every single day differently for the rest of their lives.

Okay so indulge me a minute, back to my pastor's message...this is life changing. So he had some great points. First one was that faith is birthed in God's presence. He demonstrated this by having the worship team play background music while he was talking and then suddenly stopping. Obviously there was such a difference in the atmosphere when we were ushering in His presence with worship. When the music stopped it was like crickets. We need to draw near and music is key to that.

His second point was faith goes beyond inspiration to participation. Once we are full of His presence and inspiration we need to get involved in whatever He wants for us. And this is the kicker...these are the words that made my heart kinda flip...and I quote, "Some of you are waiting on God and God is waiting on you!"

I feel like I've been waiting on God forever! Show me Lord just what to paint...how to start that book, where to find those people who need me, what am I supposed to do with this next 40 years. WHAT IF I've been waiting around and missing the TROLLEY!! What if I need to actually get off my tail and start digging some ditches??

Seriously people my heart about exploded. We apparently need to move from being inspired and feeling His presence to actual action of some sort. And naturally my next thought is Lord WHAT IS THAT ACTION? But shoot if I can't just keep asking that. I need to find that thing. Here's what my pastor suggested in finding the thing...

He said you can't do it for everyone, but you can do it for one.

What angers you?

What brings you joy?

Figure out the answers to these things and then find your purpose.

The result will be extraordinary:

You will leave a legacy if you surrender to purpose

Make a contribution

A righteous man will be remembered forever

Rise above self (prov 29:18)

Live an authentic life

Ephesians 4:1

Live a life worthy of the calling you have received.

Be a blessing.

seeing the Golden Gate

sharing these experiences with our girls

a pastor who ignites something in me

California poppies

not missing the trolley car home
BIRTHDAY WISHES THAT BLESSED MY SOCKS OFF!!!!!!

my fortieth birthday wish

noreply@blogger.com (Farmgirl Paints) — Thu, 16 May 2013 12:08:00 +0000

It's finally here. I'm officially f-o-r-t-y!!! I feel like I'm standing on the edge of a pivitol point in my walk. I've been blessed to reach the "mid-way" mark. How will I make the most of this half of my life?

There will be changes. BIG changes, and I'm not talking about gray hair, bifocals and wrinkles. Will I fight it? Will I struggle with letting go? Will I try and live in the past gripping tightly to what was, or will I bravely forge ahead?

I feel like a decision has to be made. Will my attitude reflect what's in my heart? Will my heart line up with God's plan and purpose for me? I think a milestone makes us reflect and reevaulate and that's where I'm at. You know I'm a thinker...a feeler;)

This is what I know:

I want to put Jesus first.

I want use my time wisely.

I want to serve others.

I want to find my place in the community.

I want to use all my gifts and talents for His glory.

I want to strive to be healthy...mind, body and spirit.

I want to teach my girls what they need to know to be successful.

I want to really love the people in my life.

I want to be present.

I want to enjoy every moment.

More than anything I want to live with purpose. I want to stretch my arms out wide, tilt my face to the sky, and praise the Lord for this amazing life. It's a gift...one that could end tomorrow.

Our pastor did a really cool illustration the other day. He had a really long thick rope that he said represented our lives. At one end he had just the tip taped in red. That red little tip represented our life here on earth. The rest of the rope which would go on for eternity represented our life after death.

It's weird to think that this life...the one we put SO much emphasis on is just a teeny part of our forever... It freaks me out actually. Can't really go there, but I do get the illustration.

And I think the reason I struggle with life changes so much is because honestly I'm holding onto that teeeeny tiny red part a little too tightly.

I need to stand back and see the bigger picture.

One that stretches out for eternity.

There's something wonderful that happens when instead of dreading the end...we realize it's only the beginning of something far greater than we can comprehend. That's how I want to hopefully live the next 40 years. Focused on eternal things. Using my time here for His purpose. That's my birthday wish. Use me Lord!! Show me what to spend my time on. Show me how to be a blessing. Fulfill your plan with ME!

**All pics were taken along the 101 coastline in Northern California. Muir beach overlook, Stinson Beach, and Point Reyes seashore and lighthouse. My favorite part of our trip!

Be a blessing.

cows grazing next to the pacific
sand between my toes
blue blue water
the smell of ocean and earth
memories made
40 years...thank you Lord!

greater is He

noreply@blogger.com (Farmgirl Paints) — Thu, 09 May 2013 11:30:00 +0000

Hello sweet friends. Taking a breather from cuffing to do what I love best, blogging:) It took me forever and a day to go through these pictures from Yosemite. And seriously I have enough here to make your eyes roll to the back of your head. It's okay. You really don't have to look at all of them. But it's my blog...SO I MUST POST THEM:))))

As we were driving into the valley I think I yelled STOP THE CAR at an ear piercing decibel. It was a giant field, with THIS unbelievably amazing backdrop, and I think my heart literally took flight. Other than standing on the edge of forever watching a sunset in Hawaii...this had to be the most beautiful sight I'd ever seen.

This is going to sound ridiculous, but before going to Yosemite I really had no idea what to expect. I'd seen those granite mountains in paintings before, but I really didn't know they were an actual place. I kind of thought they were an artist's depiction of heaven or something. I know, I'm a nut! But people it's REAL! I've seen it with my own eyes. That background isn't photoshopped in. If only I could add sound effects, so you could hear what the whole park SOUNDED like. The constant pounding of a distant majestic waterfall. It was incredible!!

We saw several coyotes. They were super tame and when we slowed down to snap pictures this one walked right up to the car:o

We saw lots of deer and a bobcat I think, but what we really were praying to see were BEARS!!!!!! I mean really. We went all the way to bear country. Bought a whistle and everything and no bears! There were warning signs everywhere and nada. It was tragic. That really would have spiced up the week;)

On one very chilly snow spittin' day we just didn't have the grit to hike, so we glamped a bit and had a fancy lunch at one of the lodges. I got trout. I felt very adult and sophisticated. We shared gelato, again fancy;) It was a nice departure from cooking at the house.

I love these pics by the way. My little chick made her bestie Bree in sticky form. My honey is stressing over the menu. Can you see the concentrated effort he's making to find something he not only likes, but can afford lol;)?? Oh goodness. The pictures really bring it all back. All that's missing is the click, click, click of me taking pictures non-stop:)

And yes...we made it to those Sequoia trees. The ones I've been dreaming about since I was little chick's age. They really do exist.

If I close my eyes I'm there. I can smell the trees. I can feel the chill. I can still remember the burn in my legs from walking and walking and walking. The little thrill in my spirit from the adventure we were on...the memories we were making. Oh to bottle all that up!

One of my favorite days EVER!

So you know I can't just talk about Yosemite...as amazing as all that was. That's been several weeks ago and life has been happening.

I had a phone call with a friend recently and she noted something in my voice. She nailed it actually. She said she could hear despair! Yikes!! I was telling her about my week. The one where our neighbors moved. I was telling her about feeling lonely and wishing for some things to change. Just life stuff. And she said that despair wasn't from the Lord...that it was the enemy and that I needed to take authority over it. She took the time to say a prayer over me. She gave me some praise songs to listen to, and she told me about the Jesus Culture station on Pandora...which I love (and listen to while I'm cuffing). She left me feeling lighter and less burdened. I know some things were broken off me right then.

I know about spiritual warfare. I know we don't fight against flesh and blood, but against principalities and the enemy (Eph 6:12). I know that greater is HE that is in me, than he that is in the world (1 John 4:4). I know that satan is out to steal, kill and destroy (John 10:10). I know all that, but I had seriously just forgotten. I was thinking it was just the ups and downs of life etc... But really I had allowed a stronghold to develop. I'm not kidding you, once she brought the spotlight out and exposed it for what it was and we prayed...immediately it WAS GONE! I instantly felt 10 pounds lighter. And I haven't been obsessing. I haven't felt weepy. The chains just broke off. Praise God!

I don't know why I stumble around in life sometimes, struggling or worrying, when I HAVE the authority in Jesus name to change it. That mean old devil is out to make our lives miserable, and we don't have to let him! Seriously people...if you've been going around and around that same mountain and you have been feeling SO HEAVY and SO LOW...put on some praise music. Call a friend and pray. Take authority over the enemy!! Stand on the word and HIS promises. We are the victors. Don't stay shackled because you forget who we are fighting against. It's time to declare war!

Be a blessing.

the sound of water falling

pine cones as big as my head

walking through giant trees

singing praise songs in the forest

bears and mountain lions that hid from us;)

a GOD that delivers!

friends that speak truth and pray

OPEN for business:)

noreply@blogger.com (Farmgirl Paints) — Wed, 01 May 2013 11:47:00 +0000

Note to self...next time you plan on traveling for most of the month make sure to have your work done BEFORE you leave. Girls I've been scrambling. Like really really scrambling to get my shop up and ready. But I got it done! I DID!!! I'm so proud of myself;)

Farmgirl Paints Etsy is officially open for business. Let's see we've got Mother's day at our heels. Graduation is coming up, teacher appreciation, and Father's day. These make the perfect gift.

Oh and I even got those luggage/camera/backpack/lunch ID tags listed! It's a miracle. See another miracle:) I'm writing this Tuesday night. The night before I open, and I have to admit I have some butterflies. March was so crazy insane busy. I have no idea what to expect this time around. Will my shop continue to thrive? Will it slow down? I've already made the decision to take off July and August to be with the girls. It's kind of scary...this blind trust. But that's where I'm at constantly. One blindfolded step at a time.

My friends Megan and Tara are offering discount codes for my shop on their blogs.

You don't want to miss out on that:)

Be a blessing.

friends that know just what to say...just what to pray

hands that are strong and capable to work hard
the best belt picker in the world...erin

meeting deadlines

candlelight that smells of mango

Hawaiian music

random miracles

noreply@blogger.com (Farmgirl Paints) — Mon, 29 Apr 2013 12:06:00 +0000

Happy to report our heartbreak over the neighbors moving didn't actually kill any of us. Despite the crazy crying and sadness...we are still kicking. Miracle. Sometimes it feels like it will though right? We've all lost people. All dealt with disappointment and tremendous sadness. Remembering the "in crisis" signs on the Golden Gate...people really do feel like their lives are over and the pain will never subside when faced with trials. But it does subside and life goes on. Tomorrow is always a new day. Hopefully a much better brighter day.

When little chick brought home a redbud seedling from school, on the night we had our final goodbye, I couldn't think of a more fitting farewell memory. Together they planted that little nothing...in hopes that it would take root...that it would continue to grow. I'm praying the same thing over their lives. That they will make the tremendous effort it takes to keep their friendship alive. Even in this day and age of technology it takes a valiant two sided effort and sometimes even the best intentions fade with time. It's definitely not easy.

But Bree is a special little girl. She's determined and relentless. I know she'll do her part. I feel it. The friendship WILL grow. It just will. In one of the last conversations I had with her she said..."You never know where God will take you..." Out of the mouths of babes;) I just love it when children speak truth. Speak God's wisdom. Love her. Yep you never know girl where God will take you. Trusting His perfect plan over you and your sweet family and ours:)

In other random news I had a strange spot pop up on my hand literally over night a few weeks ago. It was on my palm. It was small, but really really dark. You can barely see it in this pic. It bugged me. It was weird, and it just made me uncomfortable...like something wasn't right. On vacation I vowed to get it checked out as soon as we got home and I remember shooting up an arrow prayer. Hey Lord...can you get rid of this thing on my hand?? It bothers me and I don't like it. Thanks:)

We were sitting on the plane getting ready to fly home from vacation when I looked down and noticed it was gone. Completely disappeared...couldn't even tell where it had been!! I whooped and hollered and high fived my peeps and deep down I felt like I had a little miracle happen. He did that just for me. He was listening. It was a special moment...me and my Savior. He cares about the teeniest tiniest details of our lives.

The miracles don't always come right away. The signs aren't always flashing that He's listening...that He's present...but He is. HE IS! And I know that He's not only got the little things covered, but those big, sometimes unspoken things are being pieced together as well. The puzzle is taking shape. The pieces are being picked out, and one by one He is placing them right where they are meant to be.

*************************************************************

One of my favorite Shane & Shane songs:

Miracle...

**Linking random with Carissa today:)

Be a blessing.

my honey's 40th

hope springs new

miracles do happen:)

truffles in a sweet fox easter basket

belts sent my way...thank you mary!

birthday wishes waiting to be opened;)

friends that come and go, but stay in the heart...

belonging

noreply@blogger.com (Farmgirl Paints) — Wed, 24 Apr 2013 14:01:00 +0000

This is the post I shouldn't be writing. The one where I'm at my computer weeping as I type. Wishing I was less emotional. That I wasn't a complete basket case all the time. Wishing I could care a little less. Not hold on so tight. Wondering why I'm wired to feel so much...

Our sweet neighbors across the street are moving. I can't even believe that I'm typing this. It all happened SO fast. Boom! They are leaving us today. Heading to Texas. I'm really surprised that I'm taking it this hard. That it hurts this bad. I'm horrible with goodbyes, but more than anything I'm dreading the hurt and longing that is coming my little chick's way. The summer without her constant companion at her beck and call.

They have three little girls and Bree was my little chick's bestie. From the second we drove into our new Virginia home Bree was at our doorstep. Asking to play every single day. She was the perfect distraction. The perfect transition to leaving Minnesota behind. In one gallant swoop the Lord provided just what my girl needed. What we needed. Their sweet Christian family instantly provided a feeling of safety...of not being alone here.

I sat in their living room last night visiting with the mom. It was the first time I'd ever sat on her couch:/ We had gotten together for dinner a few times. We'd walked the neighborhood as a family at Halloween, waved daily across the street, chatted at our mailboxes...borrowed sugar etc... But nothing super close and every day.

And as I sat there I kept wondering why I didn't make the time to invest more in our friendship. Why didn't I pursue her more?? Why did I hole myself up in my studio so much when we could have been sipping sweet tea on my porch swing?? I took her for granted and now she's leaving:/ Have I stopped trying? Am I guarded? Is the time investment, and possibility for pain and heartache too much for me anymore?? Why are the online...long distance friendships so much easier? Am I too busy? I don't know.

I'm constantly reminding myself that we are in a season. That God knows just who and what we need. That there is a bigger picture. That He is holding us tightly in the palm of His hands. And I know that I know that I KNOW it's all true. It will work out. It always does. I'm just in that place. In the middle. Wanting to know the end. Wanting to feel that safety net. To know others. To be known and loved and to have lots of people...wondering if this is where we belong. That's it. Belonging.

Be a blessing.

riding the unicorn

noreply@blogger.com (Farmgirl Paints) — Tue, 23 Apr 2013 14:43:00 +0000

I really should be working, but it's the first time I've had the house all to myself since we've gotten back and I'm missing my people. Missing last week. So I'm being a little self indulgent and reflecting a bit.

We were blessed to be able to rent a beautiful house right on the Merced river in Yosemite for four glorious days. From the deck you could hear the loud rushing of the rapids. You could watch the water rushing over the huge boulders. I miss that sound. It was constant. It was powerful. It more or less erased every thought. Except at night...in the pitch black. Standing on the deck listening to the water and not being able to see it freaked me out:/

All week long we had driven by these beautiful lupine flowers along the road. I really just wanted to snap a picture with the river behind it. Capture the beauty somehow. Brand it into my brain. The whole thing...the river, the pops of color...the joy in my spirit man. The search for peace and calm.

It's the quest for relaxation that almost makes it hard find. Does that make sense? It never fails that the first day or two are usually a nightmare for us on vacation. Honey and I are at each other. We usually get lost...can't figure out where or what we should be doing. Panic sets in that we are wasting our precious vacay time. My little had a cold that popped up over night. So sniff, sniff...SNIFF! Living out of a suitcase is chaos for me. I can't find anything. I get grouchy etc... SHAME! We are supposed to be having fun. Relaxing;)

And on this day we did. We found it!! We did absolutely nothing. We walked barefoot around the property. We laid by the pool. We took a simple walk down "our" lane. We found bliss in pinecones, tree carvings, wildflowers, birds tweeting...that never ending sound of rushing water.

We walked slow. We didn't rush. There was nowhere to be. No maps to follow. No clocks to watch. Just bears to scout for in the hills. Which much to my disappointment we didn't see:(

The girls easily fell into step here...playing Barbie. Role playing auditions. Romping with each other;) We did a little exercise routine in the living room every morning to get our blood flowing. We ate poptarts on the deck. We watched hours of The Voice curled up on the couch in a huddle. We found our groove. We captured the elusive relaxation unicorn and rode it hard.

By the end of our stay in Yosemite I never wanted to leave. I seriously never wanted to plug back in. It felt right the four of us. The remote location. The lack of a cell phone in my hand. The river rushing...beckoning me to listen. To listen. To see... to really SEE! And that my friends is what it really is all about. Now if only I could somehow incorporate those four days into my every.single.day. It's high on my priority list. Somehow...someway I will figure out:)

Hope you don't mind, but I've got soooo much more to share.

Be a blessing.

big bear hugs
gravel roads
the sound of rushing water
no cell phone reception
my people
nature in all it's glory
God's blessings

His grace is sufficient

noreply@blogger.com (Farmgirl Paints) — Sun, 21 Apr 2013 14:17:00 +0000

Good morning sweet blog...sweet blog friends. I've missed you!! Feels like we've been gone a solid month. No exaggeration. We broke our vacation into three mini trips and wowza we were busy, and relaxed and BUSY, but relaxed;)

So I was laying in bed this morning, in a post-vacation fog, feeling completely overwhelmed, and instead of revisting the last week and how incredibly amazing it was I let the world crash in around me. I got that sick feeling in the pit of my stomach. Dread set in. Why God why?? Vacation is an escape. I use it to leave everything and everyone behind. I drop my brain off at the door and seriously forget anything exists, but beauty and fun and my sweet family.

Then reality comes flooding back in and there is a to-do list a mile long. There are neighbors packing up and leaving us. There are world events that didn't seem to touch us while we were in lala land. Then there are the many in my life desperately in need of prayer. It shifts the view. It's a priority check. Life isn't just fun, relaxation and the search of serenity, it's in your face....be on your toes hard. Too hard for me, but not for Him:)

I spent a good amount of time listening to one cd on the trip...The One You Need by Shane & Shane. Seriously good stuff. I drank in the lyrics. Each one speaking directly to my heart. This song keeps playing over and over in my head.

My grace is sufficient

What are you gonna do
When the doctor comes
Into the waiting room
Puts his hand on you
And says I'm sorry?

What are you gonna say to God
When all you do is pray to God
To take the thorn away?
And all you hear Him say is:

My grace, My grace
My grace is sufficient
My grace is sufficient
[x2]

What are you gonna do
When your neighbor walks
Into your living room
And you to tell him
Who could deliver them
Like He delivered you?

What are you gonna say to God
When all you do is pray to God
For them to know His name
And all you hear Him say is:

My grace, My grace
My grace is sufficient
My grace is sufficient

Listen...it's beautiful.

I'll be back at some point.

After I edit approximately a million pictures and restock my shop;)

It's reopening soon....eeeeek!

Have a blessed week.

His grace is sufficient!!!!

giant trees that touch the sun
waves crashing over and over again
warm sand that melts me to mush
poptarts for breakfast
water that sparkles like diamonds
crisp air that leaves me intoxicated
beauty that brings me to tears
precious time with my peeps

pushing 40

noreply@blogger.com (Farmgirl Paints) — Fri, 12 Apr 2013 11:30:00 +0000

I took these pictures exactly one year ago today. We were in Palm Springs...staying in that glass house. Remember this post?? The lighting was interesting. I couldn't help, but take a few self pics. I was getting ready to turn 39 in a few weeks. I wanted to capture my face and freeze it in time;)

It's a year later. I'm 33 days away from the big 4-0. If I was on the ball I would have written this post 7 days ago and entitled it 40 until 40, but I'm not that organized. Shocker;) I had ideas of doing a 40 by 40 bucket list type thing. You know 40 things I would want to complete...to achieve, by the time I'm 40. That didn't happen either:/ Geesh the pressure I put on myself. Why?? Like 40 means it's all over?? Throw in the towel...your time is up...ha! Thank God that's not true.

What is it about 40 that freaks most of us out? For me it's this giant number looming large. Like I should have all my ducks in order. I should have that book written by now. I should have lost those last ten pounds. I should have achieved all my goals! I should've...

And I'll be really honest. I haven't. I weighed this morning...for the first time in ages. I'm right where I'm always at. Dang this middle aged body;) Like I thought magically, without any dietary restrain, those 10 extra pounds would've magically melted away. That book...not quite started:0

And here's the kicker. I can tell I'm approaching 40 because I'm getting to the point where the strive for "perfection" doesn't appeal to me AT ALL anymore. I mean don't get me wrong, I'm not ready to give up and go all frumpy. I'm not bowing out on my dreams...I couldn't even if I tried;) It's just that I'd much rather walk than run. I'd much rather have a piece of chocolate than a green drink. I'm going to do what's there and not force it. I just want to be a little selfish and enjoy myself more. Is that so wrong?? (I'm also pmsing...can you tell?) My 30's were about pushing...striving. Maybe the 40's are about settling in and enjoying the ride. And it is a ride...going very very fast. If we don't enjoy it, and look around a bit, pretty soon it's all going to be nothing but a big giant blur.

So that's where I'm at. My random thoughts on aging. I hear it's great...the 40's. Unless all of you have lied to me!;) At this very moment I'm heading somewhere pretty cool to enjoy some down time with my precious peeps. It's part of my "enjoy every moment" campaign lol!! Can you guess where we're going? If you can't wait to find out follow along on IG...@ farmgirlpaints.

Oh and I'd love to hear 3 things that you absolutely love about yourself...your body, your personality, your life! We are all so blessed, but it's easy to point out the negatives. Tell me what you LOVE! I'll be back soon. With lots of stories to tell I'm sure.

I'll start...

1.) I love my smile and that my eyes crinkle a bit:)

2.) I love that I'm creative.

3) I love that I get to stay home and explore that creativity;)

Be a blessing.

vacation
unplugging
adventure seeking family members
sleeping in
eating whatever...whenever
crisp fresh air
people watching
nature at it's finest

when all seems lost

noreply@blogger.com (Farmgirl Paints) — Tue, 09 Apr 2013 11:30:00 +0000

Life is weird. I'm sitting on the good side right now. Everything is going pretty smoothly. I'm not in a valley. There isn't any major drama going on. No one's sick. We are provided for. The bills are being met. Happiness and joy abound in our house.

I'm hesitant to even type that. Like some giant shoe might drop, but I know better. Each one of my immediate family members has something they are praying for...believing for. But it seems minor in the big scheme of things. We are blessed.

But it seems that most of my close peeps are in major crisis mode. I've written about it a lot lately. SO MANY around me are struggling. We are talking major disappointments. Tears on the phone...not knowing what to say...there are no words...kind of phone calls.

I found myself hesitate recently to say "I'm praying for you". Shocker I know. I just wrote a post about praying for my friends...my people...and I do. But these closest to me have heard me say it over and over and over again. I'm afraid saying it again just sounds hollow and brings light to the fact that yes...we are STILL praying and it's apparent your situation hasn't changed yet, but...

I know they are feeling forgotten. I know there has to be feelings of why God why? Why are you allowing this? Why does everything have to be SO HARD? Why can't life be easier? Why can't it all just work out ONCE!!!!!

And I feel like my words have dried up. I feel like I don't know what to say anymore. So I listen. And I say over and over again...I know. And more than anything I want to wave a magic wand and step in and fix every little thing. I want to play God. Wouldn't that be fun? To have the power to make all the pain and suffering go away. To magically make it all RIGHT again!

But in my heart...deep down in there I know there is a reason for that suffering. It doesn't make a bit of sense to me. It really doesn't, but I know there is a bigger plan. There are things going on that are only known to HIM and that has to be enough.

He promises in His word to work for our good. He promises to direct our path. He promises us a hope and a future. HE PROMISES... And even in the darkest of moments. Even when all seems lost...it's not. It's never over. You are never forgotten. Never alone, because He never lets go!

And I know that I know that even when it feels like the other side is winning... That's not how it goes down for us!!! We are HIS. He is triumphant. WE ARE TRIUMPHANT!!!! I don't need the right words. I don't have to have a magic wand or crystal clear answers. I can listen. I can be there to love, but HE is the fixer. He will do His thing. He's got this.

Be a blessing.

**All pics taken at Boone Hall Plantation in Charleston, SC with this sweet family. Parts of the Notebook were filmed here, and Ryan Reynolds and Blake Lively recently got married at the Plantation:))

blessed assurance

picnicking with friends

exploring God's earth

cotton fields

a camera that captures

friends that share the same interests

hope

charleston, carissa and courage

noreply@blogger.com (Farmgirl Paints) — Fri, 05 Apr 2013 19:09:00 +0000

I'm sitting here trying to figure out how in the world I'm supposed to sum up the last few days. Did that trip really happen?? It was spontaneous, a little nerve wracking, whirlwindish...is that a word?, exciting and blissful all rolled into one.

I think I was sitting in the Safe Haven movie recently when the idea came to me that Spring Break would be REALLY fun if the girls and I just took off and explored the East Coast a bit. There's so much to do and see, and Daddy was going to be gone at work anyway. Then it occured to me...CARISSA! She was one of the first people that came to mind when we learned we were moving to Virginia. She lives in Charleston...I always knew I would meet her. No time like the present.

So I emailed her...and basically invited myself to come stay at her house. I do that. Be alert;) She always was one of my very favorite blog friends, but I'd never even heard her voice. Hitting the enter button was a little scary, but so worth the risk. She of course welcomed us with open arms. Nothing like that feeling though of driving 7 hours to meet someone you've never even talked to on the phone. Pulling up to a house you've painted;) Stepping out and hugging a complete "almost" stranger. Surreal to say the least.

So was walking this bridge. It's a landmark in Charleston. I forget it's name. You can't miss it. I've seen countless pics on her IG feed, so to be walking it beside her and the kiddos was a major treat. And you know this sunset had me at HELLO!!!

She chauffeured us all over town...during SPRING BREAK. You can imagine how many tourists were there. And for the record she did a great job:))

We visited the Market.

We feasted on lunch at Jestine's and cupcakes at Sugar Bakery.

We drove King Street.

We visited the Battery and White Point Gardens. So beautiful.

We took pictures of EVERYTHING Charleston.

How can you not love this town?!! It's gates, courtyards and gas lamps...the charm that is everywhere. Breathtaking! She's so lucky to live here. Work here!

Did I mention Carissa is a professional photographer? How much fun did we have? She taught me photography tips and spent one night helping me understand Lightroom. Love her! All these pics were edited finally on Lightroom...and then some were collaged in Picmonkey.

We had photo shoots on sidestreets...the girls snapping just as many as Carissa and I.

But as much as we loved Charleston, we loved Carissa and her family even more. I'm so glad I boldly invited myself to stay with her:) If I hadn't, I never would've known that we are like sisters. No really...it's weird how much we are alike.

She loses her car keys...all the time. She gets turned around...even with a gps. She's a little spacey like me. God love her! She dislikes cooking. The list goes on. We kinda/sorta even look alike...although she's 13 years younger!!!! We talk alike etc... It's creepy:)

Now she's not just Carissa from Lowercase Letters...she's our Carissa...real life friend. How incredible is that! There's a lot more to come...

*******************************************

Winners of the Jeanne Oliver Letting Go class:

Jen @ Halo Headaches

Rebecca Palm @ Gallimaufry Photography

Kaitlin @ Homemaker Design

Farmgirl Chaos

Gina @ Sweet Serenity

Be a blessing.

serenades from her honey while she made us dinner;)

new face to face meetings with IG/blogger friends...julie yarnan

sunsets that blow me away

flowers everywhere

cobblestone streets

jestine's comfort food

Thoughts on Kim Kardashian and a give-away!

noreply@blogger.com (Farmgirl Paints) — Mon, 01 Apr 2013 11:13:00 +0000

Good morning sweet peeps. Hope you all had an amazing Easter. We did! It's Monday morning and as you read this my girlies and I are on our way to meet a very special someone! Eeeeeek:)) We are road trippin' people!! Spring Break has sprung and we are pouncing on it. Can't wait to tell you all the details...if you want follow along on IG...my name is farmgirlpaints.

So in honor of my sweet friend I thought I'd try my hat at random again. She's sorta the queen of that:)

It dawned on me the other day that one of my biggest fears about moving here was losing my sunset views. If you follow along with me on IG you know that was a really silly fear of mine.

I may not see the ground in my views, but they are still spectacular. When we lived in MN our house was positioned perfectly to take in the most amazing sunsets night after night. We overlooked an old farmhouse with cows and barns and all the things I hold dear, and it was just a very special place. I really mourned that view initially. I know that sounds crazy, but the sun and I have a thing. We just do;) I thought the trees were going to ruin my view, but I was wrong. They are different, but wonderful all the same.

It became clear to me that we may have a certain idea in our heads of the way things have to be and God may have something entirely different in mind. He knows what we love. He knows what we need and even if it's not exactly the way we want it, He's gonna take care of us. Love Him!

I've really been having fun painting lately. I can't tell you how good it feels to swirl paint again. I've had a few people ask me if I would do custom pet paintings and I can tell you with 100% certainty that no I will not do custom pet, house or really any other paintings. At least right now.

I felt such relief when I finally decided to stop the home paintings. It was fun initially and then I made it WORK! And any time painting becomes work I hate it! That sounds nuts, but it's true. When I paint what I want, when I want it's pure joy. Pure BLISS! I will figure out how to get prints made though. So keep a look out for that:)

This week I finally took time and pampered myself BIG. Honey gave me a gift certificate for Christmas to spend at a day spa and it was way past due that I checked myself in!

Let's just say I'm not good at taking care of certain things. Like my feet;) They were so bad the poor girl had to get three different kinds of "cheese" grater things out. My friend Tamara made fun of me soooo bad. She's good at that;) It's just my genetics I guess to have really callused, really thick heels. Not any more though...my feet are soft and smooth like a baby's butt now. It's moving up on my priority list to do this more often. We need to take the time. It's pretty important.

Okay so my honey travels alot and when he's gone I have nothing to watch on tv. Nothing! Because all our shows are on DVR I have to wait for him! I'm explaining this because I feel like I need to clarify that Kim Kardashian is not the first thing I would pick to watch, but when you are doing the elliptical machine you need something to entertain. And entertain she does.

Is it weird that she breaks my heart?? Literally my heart hurts for this girl. She is so wrapped up in the superficial...the clothes, her outward appearance...the glam that I fear she is going to go mental someday. What in the world is she going to do when she looks in the mirror in the future and she's old? Outward beauty fades. I can attest to that. I'm starting to see it myself. OR that day when her fame will disappear...remember Paris Hilton? I can, but just barely. Anyway I just want to open her vacant eyes and fill it with something...Someone that can change her focus. Let's pray for Kim.

The Journey of Letting Go Trailer from Revilo Designs on Vimeo.

Okay if you're still with me you deserve a cookie or something. So here it is;) My multi-talented friend Jeanne is offering 5 spots to her new "Letting Go" class. I have no doubt it's going to be AMAZING! I know alot of you have that inner desire to create and you don't know where to start. Jeanne is really good at taking you by the hand and teaching you some amazing techniques. So even if you don't win check into it. Sign up. It will be so fun to spread those art wings:) To enter leave me a comment and be random. What's rolling around in your mind?? I'd love to know. I'll pick the winners after I get back from my ROAD TRIP!!!!!

Linking today...

Be a blessing!

freshly painted fingers and toes

scalp massages

friends that make you giggle

a soon to be "neighbor"

time with my girlies

meeting a special blogger face to face

you belong

noreply@blogger.com (Farmgirl Paints) — Fri, 29 Mar 2013 14:17:00 +0000

Happy Good Friday friends. I asked my girlies this morning what Good Friday was and they both just looked at me with blank stares on their faces! Uh can you say giant fail feeling as a parent this morning:\ I even helped them along...Sunday is Easter right? Jesus rose from the grave right?? What would have happened on FRIDAY??!! Again blank stares...oh and then the lights came on and little chick figured it out. Jesus died! YES!!!!!! He died. That's major.

How do I even begin to type how major that was??! IS!!! He died. He took my place, my shame, my guilt...my sin. He took it all on himself, so I wouldn't have to bear it. He died for me. ME! And you!!! And it didn't stop there...He conquered death!! PRAISE GOD!

I am so humbled by His love. So humbled by the gospel...as a parent I love my girls more than anything. The thought of any pain or suffering coming to them makes me cringe. I want to scoop them up and protect them from it all. Yet God allowed His SON to take our human wrongs and make them right. Oh dear Jesus...I'm so unworthy. Just the thought brings me to my knees.

That unworthy feeling is what I think keeps some away. How can I be good enough? How could He possibly forgive all that I've done?? I'm nothing. And if I do ask Him in...ask Him to forgive...will my life change? Will I really be different? Can I have a relationship with someone I can't see? It all seems so hard to believe. Too far out there to be real. I'll be trespassing where I don't belong. I could never fit in with all that faith stuff.

But it is real. If you are on the fence...if you are cold in your heart and you feel far from Him, I promise if you open His word, if you reach out to Him...He is RIGHT THERE. He is waiting for you. He loves you SO much. He knows your past. He knows your hurts. He knows every single thing you hold dear and He wants to scoop you up and carry you.

He loves you. He died for you. Ask Him to live in your heart. To take all that garbage away. He will. Draw near...let Him carry you.

Romans 10:9-10 That if you confess with your mouth, "Jesus is Lord," and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. For it is with your heart that you believe and are justified, and it is with your mouth that you confess and are saved.

Be a blessing.

Easter weekend

a road trip looming large

spring break

redemption

a love TOO big to comprehend

old chippy white paint

goals, dreams and fiction

noreply@blogger.com (Farmgirl Paints) — Tue, 26 Mar 2013 15:52:00 +0000

I have a feeling this post is going to be random. That's okay right? Random is good. I'm just throwing it all out there. Every.single.thought in my head;)

If you've been following along on Instagram (my IG name is farmgirlpaints) you know I've been challenging myself a bit this month. One of my hashtags is #50milesinmarch. I saw it from another IG friend and it just struck a chord. Not sure if you're like this or not, but I HAVE to have a goal or I do nothing. I have to have a list. Something...anything to get my body moving.

So this month I tied up my shoes and I kept track of my miles. It was more or less just a number to countdown to. It was just the little motivator that kept me moving. It wasn't too lofty. It actually was obtainable, and it challenged me enough that I had to keep on it or I would fall behind. Heaven forbid;)

I had someone point out to me that just doing countless miles of cardio was really pointless and didn't do much good. And I agree to a point. I have enough fitness knowledge to know that intensity is key and lifting weights and watching my nutrition is really where the results will show up, but I wasn't trying to be perfect. WHO NEEDS PERFECT!! I was trying to just move. And having a mile goal moved me. So that's what I did. I'm 8 miles away. That's so doable! I'm already thinking on next month. Ready to tackle another challenge...you game??!!

I've been enjoying my time off from the shop. One of the things I daydream about when I'm really really busy is just laying down with a good book and reading...alldaylong! So that's what I did last week. I've been reading one of Big Chick's books. The Homelanders series by Andrew Klavan...SO GOOD!

Why do I enjoy reading young adult fiction so much?? I'm starting to question my intelligence level. Am I only able to comprehend junior high/high school fiction?? HA! Regardless I'm happy understanding every word. I'm happy to steal away for hours on end and lose myself in the fast pace adventure. It's so fun to get caught up in someone else's life for a bit.

So last week I got my hair done, and my lady highlighted it and then because I think I scared her into thinking I didn't want it too blond...she toned it down without asking me:\ This generally isn't a good plan for me. I don't like surprises. I go in for highlights, I want highlights...but it's growing on me. I'm dark. Haven't been dark in a while. No pictures until I decide if I like it...k??

Oh wait this IS an after picture. It doesn't look too dark. Maybe I'm just a nut. Regardless the girls had a make-over day too. Little chick cut off several inches and at the last second decided on BANGS! She's adjusted well;) My other girlie wanted to go dark like her momma, so we low-lighted her. It's so fun having girls to do this stuff with.

Okay so my last random thought is in regards to the lottery powerball winner. Have you heard about that? Someone recently won 300+ million dollars and can get a lump sum amount of 221 million. Can you even imagine?? I have no idea why I do this, but when I hear of lottery winners I immediately start spending their money. So while I was at the gym the other day, doing my 50 miles, I was spending millions of dollars in my head;) It's a fun way to pass the sweaty miles.

I was giving money to family members and friends. I was setting aside trust funds for the girls, and starting foundations. I was buying our dream property on a perfect spot in upcountry...MAUI!! It was grand. There is just something about dreaming that is exciting. Something about an impossible possibility that fuels this little creative trigger. I love being carried away like that. What would you do if you won the lottery? What would you do if you could do ANYTHING for anyone and money was no object?? Let's dream a little:)

***Oh and thank you, thank you, thank you for sharing a little bit about yourselves with me:) I've loved reading through your letters. Soooo nice to meet YOU!

Be a blessing.

legs that carry me
friends that cheerlead
dreams that exhilarate
books that take me away
girls to do girlie stuff with

darting God

noreply@blogger.com (Farmgirl Paints) — Fri, 22 Mar 2013 13:44:00 +0000

It's one of those glorious mornings. My world is chill. The air is frosty and cool. The sun is streaming into my office. The house is quiet except for the whirl of the dishwasher. The kitchen is sparkly clean. All is well.

I was laying in bed last night talking to my honey about prayer requests. Every single person that I can think of has a specific prayer request. I seriously can't pull up one friend...one family member that I know of that I doesn't have something specific to pray for in regards to either their health, finances, job search, faith, marriage etc... The list is never ending. That's life. There is always something that we need. Something that we are waiting for. Something...

I probably say or write 10 times a day or more...praying! And I do. With every hit of the enter button, with every text I send, I shoot another "message" prayer up to my Heavenly daddy and I wonder if that is enough. Did I make my request known enough? Was that little 10 second prayer too pathetic...too small and insignificant to really make a difference?? It feels lame, but who has time to get lengthy. And quite honestly I don't know what else to say except God please help __________! They need you. And God please provide ________ or heal ___________ or work out ___________. I know I repeat myself. I know it seems rote and impersonal, but I don't know what else to say.

I'm thinking He hears me. I'm thinking it matters even when I don't feel it. I have peace when I shoot those "arrow prayers" to Him even if it's only for a split second.

So speaking of praying. My heart has been a little heavy for my momma. She's still very much in that grieving stage over the loss of her mom. I can hear it in her voice when I call...the mock cheerfulness. The tiny break in her voice, and effort to keep from weeping. It's so incredibly hard to lose someone. My heart hurts for her, because I know one day that will be me. And it scares the you know what out of me:/ I hate goodbyes, but ones that last this lifetime...uh so not looking forward to that.

When she came recently she brought pictures of Grandma and Grandpa and the life they had. I wish I knew them better. Wish I could have seen them young and in love.

Several years ago we bought our first video camera. Immediately I had this burning desire to capture my people. I was on a mission to get interviews with our grandparents and parents. I'm so grateful we have these to look back on. That we can hear their voices. That we can walk down memory lane one more time. If you haven't done this you really should. It's a priceless thing to have.

So that leads me to some questions for you;) I've been blogging a really long time. Readers have come and gone. I've developed some real true friendships from this platform. It's been life changing. I wouldn't wipe this blogging season out for anything. I used to spend a lot more time getting to know who was reading. I had the time. It came naturally. Now it seems that I do most of the talking. So if you want to share I'd love to know more about YOU. Where do you live? Why do you blog...do you blog? Do you have a prayer request? Tell me more... I want to hear YOUR voice;)

Be a blessing.

worn old photographs

memories

love that lasts a lifetime

arrow prayers...that He hears them

in the zone

noreply@blogger.com (Farmgirl Paints) — Wed, 20 Mar 2013 13:09:00 +0000

I knew this week was open. I was going to have time to paint...yayayayay!!!! You never know though if the inspiration will come. Sometimes it's there. It can be felt like the excitement of Christmas morning. I can only describe it as magic. For me I actually tingle a little bit;) It's being in the zone.

We all experience it. Maybe you feel it after you've made a beautiful meal and placed it before your family. The table is set. The candles are lit. Maybe you went that extra mile and bought flowers. Regardless of the amount of effort, you get that feeling of satisfaction. You feel giddy with the space you've created. The ingredients came together to form that delicious, eyes roll to the back of your head, goodness.

Maybe for others it's a clean house. The floors are swept. The bathrooms are sparkling. The air smells fresh. Or maybe it's after a hard run. Your body is alive with endorphins. You feel spent. Sweat and effort mingle and your body is rewarded with that perfect mix of exhaustion and exhilaration.

Without a doubt that feeling can come for me when I sit down at my painting desk. The brushes are in hand. The paint is swirled...the first strokes begin the vision. It's when an idea is formed and it's carried out to completion.

It's when I make something that I love and I don't even care if other people think it's good or not. I know that I know that I love it. And that is enough.

I wish I could live in the zone. I wish I could say that every time I sat down to paint or create that feeling came. It doesn't. Sometimes I start and it's just not there. The painting looks horrendous. The process is drudgery. The end result is less than... I feel insecure about showing it to anyone. The zone didn't happen. The grace just wasn't there.

I know that living in a heightened stage of creativity is probably impossible, but I want to at least try to create something...anything daily. What if there was no pressure to make a "masterpiece"?? What if it became more about fun and using my gifts? What if I just let God lead my eye, take my hand? Surely the magic would follow. Surely the Master could use me to create a masterpiece...His masterpiece. I believe that. Whether it be a meal, a painting, or a workout etc...I want to be in His zone.

**Hoping to make prints of my barn owl...and adding camera and luggage tags to my Etsy shop in May:)

Be a blessing.

birds chirping

buds blooming

sun streaming through my windows

a new spring shirt

a day with my sweet friends

a painting that made my heart pitter patter;)

small doses of letting go...

noreply@blogger.com (Farmgirl Paints) — Sun, 17 Mar 2013 16:28:00 +0000

My lens lust has returned. Remember this post?? Well since then I've bought a couple more. I don't know what it is about a new lens. Is it a promise of a better picture? Is it a chance to be like the professionals? Ha! I don't think so. They actually know what they are doing, but regardless I've indulged a little and my newest member is a 35mm. I wanted to try a wide angle. See how it could capture a space. Open up a room a little. So with my new "baby" on I took off shooting in a very dark house...and bedtime is what I captured.

I'm not sure when bedtime became a pain, but slowly as the girls have gotten older we kind of dread it. I'm ashamed to say that. It's really just the shift of their ages. Little chick still begs for us to tuck her in. We should want to right? She's only going to ask for a little while longer and then poof it's gone. Waaaaaaa!

Big chick pushes the envelope every night and could stay up way past us if we let her. I may be old fashioned, but I still think kids need a good night sleep. I just do. As far as the not wanting to tuck in, I think it boils down to selfishness. At the end of the day we are tired! TIRED and we just want to lay like broccoli and do nothing.

But regardless of how we feel most nights we go in and pray with our girls and tuck our little one in with all her stuffed animals...each in their assigned spots. Wondering when that will change.

We form a little circle around her bed and if we are really tired and feeling extra lazy we'll just sing a prayer instead. Jesus Jesus Lord to me...Master, Savior, Prince of Peace. Ruler of my heart today. Jesus Lord to me. And then we go right into...Because He lives. I can face tomorrow. Because He lives all fear is gone. And I know, I KNOW...He holds the future. Life is worth the living just because HE lives!

As we leave her room she always ALWAYS yells out "good night...sleep good...have good dreams...love you and the bugs bite...GOOD NIGHT!" It's her thing. It's our thing. I can't imagine not hearing those words before I go to bed every night for the rest of my life.

Big chick's space. I'm missing her hard right now. She left on Friday for her first weekend church youth retreat. We've been praying over this weekend for a long time. Been praying for God to touch her life...give her some new sweet church friends. Friends she can be herself with. Laugh with.

We've been really slow at getting to know our church peeps. We sit in the back and run out the door as soon as church is over. Trying to fix that. Trying to figure out how to bond. I can hardly wait to pick her up today. To hear her talk non-stop.

It was beyond surreal dropping her off. I remember like yesterday when my mom dropped me off at the church, then picked me up and I talked and talked and talked about my mountain top experience. And here I am...the mom. The one who knows. The one who's experienced it. I didn't even make it to the car before the tears were streaming.

It's a bittersweet mix...this letting go. You want those experiences for them. You want ALL THINGS GOOD and then on the inside you are dying a little bit because you know with every milestone they are slowly, gradually becoming their own person. Spreading their wings. Inching toward independence...getting ready to fly away;) It's a good thing. It's a hard thing.

Oh and I couldn't leave out a sneak peek at our messy room. I didn't even make the bed for you. Now you've really seen our space;) HA! Nevermind the boxes...happy mail. Lens mail;) My momma blessing me mail. Here's hoping you have a great week. I'm anticipating some time to paint. I feel a little giddy just thinking about it.

I love you friends. Thank you for coming here.

For touching my life with your words.

You really do mean a lot to me.

Be a blessing.

my heart and soul...finding her way.

third day, colton dixon and josh wilson. the girls first concert. AMAZING!

date night with sweet friends...laughing until it hurt. jim gaffigan is the best!

an ig friend (suddenlysuze) who blessed us in a BIG way;)

side-stepping

noreply@blogger.com (Farmgirl Paints) — Thu, 14 Mar 2013 11:30:00 +0000

I have a friend who's organized to the max. She's a planner. She's detailed. When she had her own business she had a 20 page business plan. This floored me...20 pages!! I admire and respect this proficient, prepared side to her, but we couldn't be any more opposite.

I have a business and seriously it kind of just fell into my lap. I made a cuff for myself one day, (because I love words) and I thought it was a cool thing, and pretty soon I started making them for other people. I had no plan. I had no idea what I was doing. There were no projections. I only recently started ordering my supplies wholesale...got a business license. I'm finding my way...stumbling through.

I've always really looked at my Etsy store as a little hobby while I waited to pursue my real dream. I am Farmgirl PAINTS right? I should be painting something...ANYTHING! But what if God has me right here, right now...stamping away for HIS purpose. What if those "distraction" cuffs aren't about being sidetracked, but more about being right where He wants me. Hammer in hand. Inspirational words, reminders, floating all over the world as His witness. Yikes...that really is cool:)

I'm not shelving my other dreams. I would love to illustrate a children's book, make and sell prints, have a card line etc... All of that makes my heart pitter patter!! And maybe/hopefully those things will happen. Maybe I really will be an artist one day;)

Regardless I can't be blinded to the doors HE has opened. I can't be so completely focused on my wants, my will, that I see every other thing as a "side" step. Life isn't a side-step. Wanting and waiting for a dream to be fulfilled isn't a bad thing, but while I wait...while I live and breathe...I'm going to do what He's placed right before me. What about you? Do you feel like you are just waiting for that one thing to happen before you can start living??

Be a blessing.

thoughtful cards in the mail

comments from "strangers" that bless my heart

the gift of creativity

coke zero with vanilla from sonic;)

fun couple of days ahead

my new logo stamp:))

yellow piano BLISS

noreply@blogger.com (Farmgirl Paints) — Mon, 11 Mar 2013 15:03:00 +0000

Well hello there my sweet sweet friends. I'm finally crawling out from under the Etsy craziness. I really was a little nervous about cutting down my hours and going occasional, but God had other things in store, and He showed up in a big way. You showed up in a BIG way! Thank you for blessing my shop...my family! My hands are aching from all the cuffs I made in the last ten days:) I really can't say thank you enough!!!

So with that said...I've been dying to show you my painted piano finally. I've got most of the room pulled together. It was a labor of love, and by love I mean L.O.V.E! Here's how it went down.

Sometimes I wonder if I don't have a little bit of that bipolar thing going on. There are days where I walk through life in a depressive fog...lethargic...floundering and then there are the sublime moments when a ray of sun shines down from above and the angels sing and I swear I can move mountains. I walk through my house paintbrush in hand and I conquer. YES CONQUER just about anything that has been bugging me. Any unfinished project comes under my will and determination and that's where I was a couple of weeks ago. You have to take advantage when it happens;)

My piano room was fine. No big problems there, but it was just blah! The red, white and black was a little lifeless and the piano (which I painted years before) just blended into the space like a big black hole. So I got an itch to repaint and then I instagrammed that I wanted to repaint, and then I HAD to repaint! You know how that goes.

If anything, instagram is one giant accountability partner...you gotta love that. Everyone voted their favorite color and it was a split big time between turquoise and bright funky yellow. However the bright funky yellow was calling my name.

IMMEDIATELY I ran out and bought the paint because that's how I rolled that week. And I was off to take down that black hole of a piano. After the first coat I excitedly texted a couple of friends and one said ooooh that's gonna be a challenge because you didn't prime. And I was like whatev...it'll be fine. :0

I had a reason for not priming. I was going to distress and I wanted the black to pop, BUT holy cow four coats in and I was starting to panic. It was not looking good. I had drips everywhere. I couldn't cover the black for the life of me.

This always happens when I paint. There is that midway point when I want to curl up into a ball and cry in the corner...sucking my thumb. Well it came and then it went because once I got my palm sander out that piano started to SING!! If you don't have a palm sander run right now and go GET ONE! Best thing ever. It makes your mistakes look intentional. It takes a disaster and makes it look like magic:)

So here are the steps for those of you wanting to try this at home. And just to clarify here I'm not a pro. This is probably not the proper way of doing it.

Obviously take it apart and tape off the areas you want to protect.

1.) If it's not painted already prime it. If it is, gently sand it to rough it up a bit and wipe it down.

2.) Paint. Paint. Paint. Paint again. It took me four coats. That really sucked. Sorry, but it did.

3.) Use that palm sander I told you to buy and sand the heck out of all the edges...any drips and place you want it to look old and aged. You really can't mess this up. Just be careful not to leave the sander in one place too long or you can eat the wood up a bit.

4.) Wipe it down and if you want rub on a little black coffee Martha Stewart metallic glaze. Especially on any areas you may have taken down to the bare wood. Rub on and off with a cloth.

5.) Then take a clean white rag and apply a very thin coat of paste wax. This will give it a hard top coat and protect it and kind of finish and shine it up. Then after it dries...about 20 minutes buff it off in small circles with another clean rag. And VOILA gorgeousness!!!!! Seriously you'll be kicking yourself that you didn't do it years before.

I wasn't really feeling the stark black piano bench, so I went hunting and found this sweet little industrial stool at a local antique store and voila...instant make-over...

MAGIC!

Promise you won't covet my sewing skills;)

I displayed one of my vintage toy trucks, painted my brass lamp a funky turquoise and added my clock collection. And all of a sudden it was bliss...pure decorating bliss. All my favorite little things in one spot;)

I finally hung my BE tree (which had been sitting in a corner for two years) and added a new piece I'd been working on...dare to stand alone;) Funny when I started that yellow farmhouse it was before I even knew about my yellow piano. I didn't plan to put it in there. I really didn't have a plan at all...but it looks perfect!

After it was all done I needed to revamp the room a bit, so I ran to Joann's IMMEDIATELY and bought some fabric to make pillows to tie it all together. Cause that's how I roll remember;) However my machine was not cooperating AT ALL...so I only got one made and I just pulled the rest from around the house. Love the look though. That one pillow made it;)

I have to say seeing that yellow piano makes me almost giddy. The room glows. It does! It's happy and funky and suits me just perfectly.

I still have a little area I'm working on. I'm thinking that lamp shade needs a redo, and the table needs a fresh coat of paint to pop...maybe turquoise;)?? I love pittering around the house. It truly brings me joy changing things up. Making them personal and mine.

I promise I haven't forgotten about showing you the basement. I have something I want to sew, and a thing I need to hang... It just takes time.

Be a blessing.

my shop is closed!!
seven weeks off;)
sales that made my heart explode
a yellow piano that glows
decorating bliss

i have decided...

noreply@blogger.com (Farmgirl Paints) — Tue, 05 Mar 2013 12:00:00 +0000

Man I've missed blogging. I'm usually pretty consistent, but things have been really hectic around here and it's gotten shoved to the back burner. I miss writing. I miss sharing our lives. Spilling it all out here...in this special spot. So here goes;)

You know when you kind of stand back and watch your life from above. Not like an "out of body" experience, but when it just comes full circle and you can remember when you did certain things as a child and here you are a grown adult, and you are watching your kids do them and it just hits you smack in the middle of the forehead! Well that's what last week was.

When I was a little girl on December 28th, 1979 I asked Jesus into my heart. I remember it like it was last night. I asked my mom if you used a ladder to get to Heaven and she simply shared the gospel with me...right at our kitchen table.

She said the angels were writing my name down in the Lamb's book of Life. I remember crying and feeling God's presence. I remember the date because she promptly made a little memento with my class picture on it and we stuck it right on the bulletin board. I was 6. I've of course matured in my faith since then, but that's where the first faith seeds were sown. That's when I knew the truth and my eyes were opened.

A while back we were able to share with the gospel with our girls and they accepted the Lord into their hearts. Since that time we've been wanting to work out a time for them to get baptized...to follow in His footsteps. The timing has been off since we moved to VA.

It's hard when you live away from family. Of course we want everyone there and that's just impossible. And we didn't want to do it back home...Virginia IS our home now. I just needed my mom and dad, and God worked that out. Even Grandma was peeking over the balcony of heaven, right there with us.

This was the month they were changing it up at church. Instead of going right over to the tank they were having those being baptized come up front and share a little bit. Can I just say I was a nervous wreck??!! One of my biggest fears is speaking in front of people. I don't know why. It's kind of ridiculous, but it is. So for my girls to get up there... Ack! Lord help me.

At home we had rehearsed a little what the Pastor might ask and they answered, but it made me cringe a little. They seemed kind of unsure what to say and as the day approached I got more and more nervous. Then Sunday morning rolled around and little chick woke up with a stomach ache and I immediately thought it was nerves. Because Lord knows if it was me MY stomach would hurt...uh actually my stomach DID hurt now that I think about it!!

I didn't need to be nervous though one by one they marched up to the stage, took the microphone and declared that Jesus was their Savior and they wanted to do what He did. Little chick read off her favorite scripture Proverbs 16:9 In his heart a man plans his course, but the LORD determines his steps. Big chick boldly declared that she wanted her life to be a light...that she wanted to SHINE for Jesus. Her verse was Matthew 5:16 In the same way, let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven.

So needless to say by the time we got over to the baptism tank I was a blubbering mess. It was beautiful. I could feel the Holy Spirit so strong. I look at these pictures and I can just feel it all over again.

My girl felt it too. After it was over she broke down and sobbed and sobbed. We all joined in with her.

He makes all things new!

There are several proud moments you feel as a parent. A good report card; a goal scored in a soccer game; an award ceremony...a kind word from a stranger. Nothing quite compares to the joy of seeing them decide to follow Jesus. They can strip every other thing away and that is what ultimately matters. I have this song in my head...sing it with me. I have decided to follow Jesus. I have decided to follow Jesus. I have decided to follow Jesus...no turning back, no turning back.

**A big thank you to my friend Brandee who captured the day so beautifully.

Be a blessing.

obedience

having mom and dad with us

my girls loving Him

our church

our friends here who have become our stand in family

the family cuff & shop talk

noreply@blogger.com (Farmgirl Paints) — Fri, 01 Mar 2013 12:30:00 +0000

Good morning sweet friends. Sorry I've been absent this week. I've got a lot to share, but my folks got here last Friday and there just hasn't been computer time. I wanted to take a second to announce the winner of the family cuff though. It's Nic at seventy piggies!!! Congrats girlie.

Oh and just a reminder my Etsy shop reopens today. It's occasional and will only be available from today until the 10th. Next month is crazy busy with trips, so I'm not opening in April! So if you are expecting a cuff emergency hit me up in the next 10 days!! I'll reopen May 1st. Yikes;)

***BTW...I've got some coupon codes here and here. Happy shopping:)

Be a blessing.

hunting for treasures

adding to the family memory bank

my moravian star light

gps

death day

noreply@blogger.com (Farmgirl Paints) — Thu, 21 Feb 2013 18:51:00 +0000

We got the call this morning that my Grandma passed away. My mom flew back home to Illinois last night and Grandma died this morning at 6:15 a.m. in Arizona. I so wish mom could have been there with her, but they had their sweet goodbyes. The Lord worked all that out. Grandma wasn't alone, a precious nurse was by her side as she quietly took her last breath.

I really didn't think her passing would affect me much. I know that sounds weird, but we weren't close. My grandparents moved to Arizona when I was just a year old. I only have a few memories of her...vacations as a young girl, taking Big Chick to see her as a baby. She never even met my little one. But despite that distance my emotions today are so raw. In my mind I can hear her voice. I can see her tiny little form. I can remember her likes and dislikes...the candy she loved...the stories she used to tell...her amazing apple bars:) I can picture the way my mom loved and doted on her. And that is why my heart is heavy. My momma...

Grandma was 100 years old. She died of natural causes. She knew Jesus. What a blessing!!! I know that I know that she's in heaven right this second dancing with Him and Grandpa. She's traded that old feeble body and mind for a brand spankin' new one. No more pain. No more suffering. No more loss. Can you even imagine?!! Her death day is a party for her.

We whisper the word death. We step around it because it's ugly and painful. It's a huge giant hole for us...the left behind. The loss and grief consume, we feel it to the core, but she's a new creation. Her eternity...her forevermore has finally begun. Happy death day Grandma...welcome to your forever home. We love you!

Be a blessing.

997. a heavenly reunion right now
998. the promise of a forevermore
999. the love of a mother
1000. a God who welcomes us home with open arms! My 1000 gifts!!!!!!

Alicia's spring chick virtual baby shower!!!

noreply@blogger.com (Farmgirl Paints) — Wed, 20 Feb 2013 12:30:00 +0000

Good morning friends. You remember my friend Alicia right? The one we went to the Outer Banks with last summer? The one "family" friend we have Thanksgiving with?? Well she's pregnant with her fourth. Remember this post? We captured them telling the fam...it was awesome.

My girl lives in Asheville away from all her friends and family, so we (me and a bunch of her blogging friends) decided to throw her a VIRTUAL BABY SHOWER! WHAT?? WOOT WOOT!!!!! My girl needs some stuff. Baby chick four can't feel left out. They had donated most of their baby stuff thinking they were probably done and then decided four felt right:) So we are replenishing the stock!

Now my friend Alicia can throw a mean party...take a look HERE! This girl is good. So it's kind of a relief my shower can be virtual or there would be some major pressure. Major!

She loves vintage. Loves the look of anything old school. SO if I were planning a shower it would have some old chippy white dressers and lots of creams and yellows. It would have to have that table skirt for sure. She made me one almost just like it, so I know it looks JUST LIKE HER!

I'd drum up some baby pics of her and Jarrod. Maybe grandparents too. I'd have her mom send me toys or momentos from her childhood. We'd do it up. I'd try really hard to make her cry. She's not quite the emotional basket case I am, so it would be a challenge;)

We probably wouldn't play games. I'm not a fan of baby shower games and since this is my party we'd skip that;) We would however take lots of pictures...'cause that's what we do. I'd set up a photo booth with some wacky outfits or something and we'd make her try them all on!!! Ahhhh and maybe we would do a paint project. ONE giant participant crafty project that she could use later to decorate the baby's room. Wouldn't that be fun?!

Source: Betty Crocker, Fav Pop, The girl who ate everything

And you know there'd be cake...preferably cupcakes:) And to go along with her vintage theme we would probably need some sort of white cupcake or something colorless...NOT! Oh no, not at my shower... ahem I mean Alicia's shower;) I prefer the ones on the left of course. How stinking adorable are those!?! Oh my word. But really they are all adorable!!!

And of course there would be gifts. This part kinda killed me cause I'm a need to know kind of girl. I NEEEEEEEEED to KNOW THE SEX OF THE BABY!!!!!! But I don't and I'm ~~really upset~~ alright with it;) So I got them a cute little assortment of gifts. If you would like to bless their family as well...here's a link to her Target registry.

First of all I stalked her on Pinterest and found this amazing little lamb print here. He/she had to have some new smelly goodness and a cute new bib...oh and a soft cuddly take along toy, and one of our favorite books of all time...Time for Bed. I used to read that to the girls every night before bed. Love that book! That's a start. I'll have to spoil him or her with an outfit or something gender related later I guess;)

If you know Alicia and want to throw her a shower too jump on board...grab the button and link up. There's a big giant lovefest going on at Amy's, Amy's, Amy's, Mary's, Suzanne's, Sasha's and Carissa's.

***Oh and a shower wouldn't be a shower at all without a door prize...so leave me a comment with a helpful tip you couldn't live without...words of wisdom...or if you don't have any tips maybe some fun baby names:)) The winner will receive a personalized family cuff!!

Be a blessing.

All shower ideas...except the cupcakes came from this awesome magazine Mingle!

992. my yellow piano
993. the girls giggling in the backyard right now
994. sun streaming in
995. blessing my friend
996. a community that raises each other high