Fat and Fickle

2 Months In

2011-04-06T10:03:00.000-05:00

Hey, it's been a while since I posted anything out here. That's because I've been so busy. I've sort of plateaued in my weight loss efforts at a total of 30lbs. The good news is, my belt is on the tightest notch. So keep on truckin'.

Upping the Ante

2011-03-13T06:00:00.002-05:00

All right, I've got this diet thing going just fine. I haven't eaten anything bad for me in significant quantities since I started my diet. Now it's time to do some fine-tuning.

I met with a personal trainer at Lifetime Fitness and bought their metabolic package. Apparently, what happens is they're going to test my metabolism while I'm rested with no food in my stomach, and then they'll perform the same test with food in my stomach. That will determine how my body burns calories just by living average, everyday life. The tests will also measure what my rate of caloric burn is while exercising.

Once the testing is complete, they're going to program that data into this Cadillac of a heart monitor that I just bought. This little contraption is going to tell me exactly what I'm burning as I workout. The trainer is going to setup a specific workout regiment tailored just for me. They are aware of my quest to lose as much weight as possible, as quickly as possible.

Taking this workout shit to the next level.

Then I'll meet with a nutritionist. I'm not expecting this brain wizard to tell me anything I don't already know. I live on a diet of salads, nuts, clementines, and string cheese. There's a very modest amount of meat for protein's sake, but also because I just don't care about eating anymore. Food has been reduced to something I have to eat as a means in which to lose weight.

I'm going to be straight up with all of you. Spinach tastes like spinach, clementines taste like clementines, and beats taste like beats... But a 16oz New York strip from Manny's tastes like euphoria... The same kind of euphoria that comes from having great, orgasmic sex, obligatory blow job included.

Simply put, eating of any kind isn't fun anymore. Maybe that's a good thing, I don't know.

Feeling the Burn

2011-03-12T06:00:00.001-06:00

I have been tracking my calorie burns on the elliptical machine during my 65 minutes sessions.

03/10 - 754 calories burned
03/07 - 774 calories burned
03/03 - 744 calories burned
03/02 - 722 calories burned

Of course, I can't track the calories spent walking around on the cool down at the end of the workout, or while playing racquetball. I'll have to figure that one out.

Dieting Isn't All Bad

2011-03-11T11:01:00.000-06:00

Checkout this massive 3 salad sampler combo. I got it over at Cafe Latte in St.Paul. Their soups and salads are legendary. The salad on the upper left was a squash and crab salad. On the right we've got a beat salad. On the bottom is a sesame.

I was unable to finish this lovely plate.

Groceries and Oddities

2011-03-11T10:26:00.000-06:00

The biweekly trip to the grocery store has become rather inexpensive thanks to my squirrel diet. That being said there are some oddities that I want to point out. But first, checkout my shopping cart! Doesn't it look healthy?

All fresh food, nothing processed.

On to the marketing... Going to the dairy section at the grocery store, or at least Rainbow in St. Louis Park, essentially feels like going to a women only club. Let's see here, we've got an endless selection of yogurt designed for the opposite sex... Since it's not for me I'm not going to buy it. Yoplus, Probiotic, Activia; all guaranteed to help you regulate your whatever.

Yogurt... Women only.

The previous was at Rainbow. However, I did pop in to Cub Foods here in the ghetto to pickup a few things. That and my buddy Jeff needed to do a full shopping trip and I was his ride. I stumbled upon Ugli fruit. Indeed, Ugli fruit is quite ugly. Then of course you have these miniature bananas. I guess somebody buys this stuff, otherwise they wouldn't have it. I wanted to try one exotic fruit so I could say I had tried it; I bought a papaya.

Ugly, I mean Ugli fruit...

Mini-bananas, why bother?

Once I got it home, it was a bit of a shock to me. The outside of the fruit smelled like a dirty jock strap marinated in garbage juice. Jeff cut it up, and the smell got worse. I thought Durian fruit was supposed to stick, not Papaya. Nope, I was wrong. It must taste good in order to make up for the foul scent. It tasted horrible. I took one bite and that was it. I gave Jeff the whole Papaya. Nasty!!

Cub Foods papaya, tastes as bad as it smells.

I had to scrub that cutting board real hard to get the stench off it.

March 7th, 1 Month Milestone

2011-03-11T09:34:00.000-06:00

I weighed myself exactly one month after starting the personal program of mine. I have lost 22.8 pounds so far.

Lost 20 Pounds So Far

2011-03-03T09:03:00.000-06:00

My actual starting weight was 255. I weighed myself yesterday and I came in at 234.6. I spent a couple hours at the gym yesterday, and plan on doing the same again today.

Pomelos

2011-03-03T07:58:00.000-06:00

Me and my workout buddy decided to go to Cosco after our foray at the gym. Our mission was to buy one of those thingies that monitors your heart beats, step count, calorie burn count, and wakes you up in the morning with a cup of coffee. Unfortunately, Cosco was sold out. That's right, Cosco sold out of them. I didn't know Cosco was capable of selling out of anything. Alas, we were vexed yet again because my shopping buddy couldn't find another item they were looking for.

We did however stumble on to these massive Grapefruit looking things. Apparently they're called Pomelos, and they hail from somewhere in southeast Asia. These of course are from California, naturally. The sticker on the bag says they taste like Grapefruit, but sweeter and milder. Hey that sounded good to me. Naturally, I had to throw in a sophomoric joke about the size of my balls as I dangled the sack of over sized fruit in front of me.

The picture doesn't do justice. This fruit is nearly the size of your head.

That was Saturday. Today is Thursday, and I've eaten two of these enormous things. You can only realistically eat a half a fruit at a time. I like citrus fruit a lot, but there are limits to how much one can have before it's time to throw in the towel. The Pomelo is so big, that it doesn't fit into any bowl I own. So I cut it in half, cut around the circumference of the half, cut through it four ways, and then sort of push the flesh of the fruit out from the back. It's sort of like opening a milk carton.

Make your entire meal out of citrus if you'd like. This is 1/4 of the fruit shown.

I highly recommend this fruit. It's quite tasty, and goes well with coffee. Although the meal is acidic and bitter, some how I think that suits me well... If the shoe fits...

Saturday's Sweat

2011-03-03T07:40:00.000-06:00

Last Saturday, I was at the gym with a workout buddy. We were on the machines doing our thing. The conversation drifted over to the subject of Cosco. "Yea, they sell these things that monitor your heart rate and the amount of calories you burned." "Really? I didn't know they had those." "What?!? You didn't know that? Are you shitting me!?" "I shit you not..." Such were the conversations of me and my workout buddy.

Later on, I would be photographed working out on one of those stupid balls they have at the gym. Here's the picture. Some Facebook commenter compared me to Jimmy Kimmel's ball hump or something. I was sore for days after that, but what can you do?

Lost 14 Pounds So Far

2011-02-22T22:22:00.000-06:00

I went to the gym today and got a real nice workout. On top of the diet, adding some weekly exercise should help get me some results... I hope. Anyway, I weighed myself and was very happy to see that I've lost 14 lbs. Just another 46 left to go.

A Breakfast Reflection

2011-02-21T10:17:00.000-06:00

I went to Curran's for breakfast with my 93 year old grandmother on Sunday morning. She's the immortal athlete that's going to be standing around like a bronze statue through time; she'll probably out live us all... Anyway, she had a significantly larger meal than I did. This is a first in the history between us.

I looked at the menu. I thought about calories and fat for about 2.5 seconds. But then I thought more along the lines of the fact that it was snowing outside, I want to go home, and I don't even like the act of eating anymore.

Up until last fall I was all about eating whatever I want, wherever I want, whenever I want. Slight problem with that philosophy is you get fat, feel like shit, and women won't want to date you for the fore mentioned reasons. I could also say that there was a bit of change in lifestyle due to neccessity. My last job had me so busy during the final months of my contract, that I simply just stopped going out for lunch. I had clementines at my desk for breakfast, and a sandwhich for lunch.

Fast forward to present day. Thanks to my crucible mind-set, I don't like eating anymore. Therefore perusing Curran's menu lead me to the side orders. Grapefruit and oatmeal will now be my breakfast.

Breakfast was served and I ate my food... sorta. I finished the grapefruit and about a third of my oatmeal.

Sorry, I just don't feel like eating.

Why did we even bother going out to eat? I could have had this at home.

Later in the afternoon I ate a ham and cheese sandwich, with a few handfuls of peanuts here and there. My visiting mother was kind enough to cook an outstanding dinner of three cheese tortolinni with a garlic spinach sauce. Too bad, I was barely able to eat half of it. Perhaps it would make a good lunch the next day?

I did wind up eating a little more later on. I was drafted to be taxi driver for my friends Jeff and Connie for a trip to Good Sports. There were about 4 bites left of her cheeseburger that she didn't finish. I ate what was left of the burger, which wasn't much.

Emerging From The Crucible

2011-02-21T09:36:00.000-06:00

Considering what I have been going through, I'm surprised that I was able to tighten my belt a notch yet again. I was hospitalized for nearly 5 days last week in what was the worst week in my life as an adult.

While in the hospital, I was served 3 squares a day or crap that resembled public school lunch. Simply due to the fact that I refused to eat most of my food, I lost weight. Since my release, my appetite hasn't returned. It's a strange thing to think about, but I haven't been able to finish a meal, except once, in 7 days. The one exception was a late night breakfast at the Uptown Diner after an evening of carousing. Unfortunately, I wound up throwing it all up 5 hours later, so it doesn't really count as a successful completion.

Putting all that heinous crap aside for a minute; I do feel lighter and more nimble. Let's see where this weight loss thing takes me. One thing is for certain at this point. I have absolutely no idea what I'm doing. All's I know is when I'm supposed to eat.

Set-back Gets Worse

2011-02-13T09:15:00.000-06:00

Unfortunately, I wasn't able to contain my appetite through out the night. My friends were present and stuffing their faces, and they were boozing as well. I'm so incredibly disappointed and upset with myself right now.

Sci-fi Saturday night-time snacking: On top of the previous posting's consumption
- 2 handfuls of dark chocolate acai blueberry / raisin things
- 1 serving of summer sausage
- 2 small vodka mixed with pomegranate cocktails

Kip had used his double-talk lawyer speak (peer pressure) to convince me that it was okay to drink (he was drinking the same thing) because I had only promised myself I wouldn't have a drink for two weeks. He kept asking me if I had promised myself or the girl. Nope, I had promised myself... Great, so I can't even keep promises to myself... Fuck'n hell man.

Fortunately, Kip and Jeff were able to eat the rest of the pizza for me. Somehow, Jeff ate quarter of the pizza, whole bag of chips, and still managed to chug down a six-pack.

Skinny people... Bastards... Excuse me, I'm going to go eat a bowl of cardboard now.

A Slight Set-back

2011-02-12T18:33:00.000-06:00

Saturday 02/12: I think I've managed to keep my caloric intake around 2000 calories or less, but I definitely lost out in the fat intake category. Thanks to Sci-fi Saturday, I wound up eating some frozen pizza. My buddy Jeff was kind enough to eat a flat bread sandwich in the car, in front of my face, while I was driving us back to my house.

Breakfast: at home ~ 9:00am
- 1 piece of peanut butter toast
- 1 celery stalk

Lunch: at home ~ 2:30pm
- 1 Baja bean and cheese burrito nuked: I burned my tongue real bad on the first bite.

Dinner: at home ~ 5:30pm
- 3 slices of Digiornos Supreme pizza - This is the part where I have my set-back. :(

Only 340 calories per serving! Only 6 servings in a pizza... Yikes!

Friday 02/11

2011-02-12T18:14:00.000-06:00

Friday 02/11: Fifth day of dieting. There was a break in the squirrel diet today. I went with Jill to Origami for dinner. This was the first time I ate out since starting the diet. Origami is a sushi house with an excellent reputation. We both agreed that we had the best sushi dining experience in our lives.

Breakfast: at home ~6:30am
- 1 LARGE bowl of Fiber 1 raisin bran (cardboard)

Snack: at work ~10:00am
- 2 handfuls of roasted almonds

After a while these taste like tree bark.

Lunch: at work ~11:30am
- Pan fried chicken breast with sauteed vegetables brought from home and then nuked

Snack: at work ~5:30pm
- 1 Granny Smith apple

Dinner: at Origami ~7:00pm
- Pickled vegetables, Miso soup, chicken skewer, Sari Roll, NY NY Roll

The best Miso Soup I've ever had in my life.

Pickled; flavorful yet not the least bit salty.


NY NY Roll on the left and Sari Roll on the right: delicious!

Thursday 02/10

2011-02-10T22:55:00.000-06:00

Thursday 02/10: Fourth day of dieting. I got my hours for eating a little goofy, I think. I'm looking forward to the GF's guidance for grocery shopping this weekend. My diet this week resembles that of a squirrel and it's starting to annoy me.

Breakfast: at home ~6:30am
- 1 LARGE bowl of Fiber 1 raisin bran (cardboard)

Snack: working from home ~10:00am
- 3 handfuls of peanuts
- 2 clementines

Lunch: at work ~2:00pm

- 3 clementines
- 2 handfuls of roasted almonds

Snack: at work ~4:30pm
- 1 Cub Foods peanut butter granola bar (2 come in the package, counts as 1)

Dinner: at home ~7:00pm
- Pan fried chicken breast with sauteed vegetables.
(2 bell peppers, green onions, 1 squash)

It was actually quite good. Only took about a half hour to make.

Wednesday 02/09:

2011-02-10T22:44:00.000-06:00

Wednesday 02/09: Third day of dieting. It's also my second day in a row of after work meetings. That means I won't have time to cook a proper dinner... damn it.

Breakfast: at home ~6:30am
- 1 bowl of Fiber 1 raisin bran (cardboard)

Snack: at work ~9:30-11:00am
- 2 hand fulls of roasted almonds
- 2 clementines

Lunch: at work ~12:30pm

- 2 bars (single package / 1 serving) Cub Foods granola peanut butter bar (more cardboard)
- 2 hand fulls of roasted almonds

Snack: at work ~3:45pm
- 2 clementines
- 2 handful of roasted almonds

Dinner: at home ~ 6:00pm
- 2 Baja bean and cheese burrito (nuked)
- 4 slices (1 serving) summer sausage

Tuesday 02/08

2011-02-10T22:35:00.000-06:00

Tuesday 02/08: Second day of dieting; I had a meeting in the evening so this was going to be complicated. Just what I was afraid of. Also, as of now, I have decided that I will not be counting coffee and diet soda. The caloric intake from those is negligible. Sorry GF, I don't wanna hear it.

Breakfast: at home ~6:30am
- 1 bowl of Fiber 1 raisin bran (cardboard)

Snack: at work ~10:00am
- 1 Cub Foods blueberry snack bar (woops, too sugary)
- 2 clementines

Lunch: at work ~11:30am

- Left over chicken peanut stir-fry from yesterday

Snack: at home ~5:00pm
- 2 clementines
- 2 handful of peanuts

Dinner: at home
- 1 Baja bean and cheese burrito (nuked)

Monday 02/07

2011-02-10T22:27:00.001-06:00

Monday 02/07: I went to the store to get the food I'll be eating, so my diet isn't quite in place yet.

Breakfast: at work ~8:30am
- 3 clementines
- 6 cups of coffee (3 mugs but hot damn!!)

Lunch: at work ~12:30pm

- Texas Longhorn sandwich from Milios
- 1 small bag of Lay's Sour Cream & Onion

Snack: at home ~5:30pm
- 2 bars of Lynn Riskedal's granola, cardboard tasting squares

They're actually not that bad.

Dinner: at home ~7:30pm

- Peanut chicken stir-fry:
(1 chicken breast, 2 bell peppers, 1 squash, 1 cup peanuts, 3 table spoons peanut butter, 2 jalapenos, green onions)

Fresh Ingredients

Cooking in the wok.

Dinner is served; no rice on purpose.

Getting Started

2011-02-10T22:20:00.001-06:00

Good evening, this is my first posting for the Fat and Fickle blog. My girl friend has decried that I am to lose weight. She tells me that eating this thing called breakfast is going to help me get there. So that's what I've started doing before going into work. Additionally, I am to cut alcohol out of my diet... At least mostly. Apparently booze is packed full of empty calories; imagine that.

I have been directed to write down what I eat... (sigh) Well if I must, then that's what I'll do. A little challenge to myself; I've taken pictures of some of the food I've been eating as proof of my legitimate efforts to make good on my part. Actually it's all my part, what the hell am I talking about? It's not as if anybody else is forcing me to live the lifestyle I've been living.

I'm going to post up everything I eat--assuming I remember--and maybe this will help keep things under control. Right... Let's go.