When I learned the word "feminist", I knew it was for me. At age 12, I told my mom that I decided I was a feminist.

So what does being a feminist have to deal with me? Very much.

You see, I'm recovering from an eating disorder. To be exact, purging bulimia. It started out the way many eating disorders do - as a way to lose weight. Of course it becomes more than that, but its always a part.

Being a feminist has helped my recovery greatly. It made me realize that I did not need to conform to what the media thought I should look like. I think reading Full Frontal Feminism and reading that, helped so much too.

I never thought that being a feminist would affect my life as much as it has. I convinced my dad to vote for Obama, and my staunchly anti-choice parents finally gave up on trying to change my mind.

I've informed many of my friends, who were unaware of many of the statistics. Some of them even helped me confront the abstinence-only teacher who tried to tell us condoms cause cancer. I brought in a paper the next day from the FDA about the effectiveness against pregnancy and STDs for condoms. The look on her face was very funny.

In 7th grade my best friend and I did a report on feminism - changing many of the majority anti choice minds in my class.

To sum it all up, thank you feminism.

'There’s nothing like science for giving that objective, white-coat flavoured legitimacy to your prejudices, so it must have been a great day for Telegraph readers when they came across the headline “Women who dress provocatively more likely to be raped, claim scientists”. Ah, scientists. “Women who drink alcohol, wear short skirts and are outgoing are more likely to be raped, claim scientists at the University of Leicester.” Well there you go. Oddly, though, the title of the press release for the same research was “Promiscuous men more likely to rape”. '

I couldn't, and I told him the reason why is because of the law that was put into effect, that you couldn't ask someone how much they make legally, basically speaking to the obfuscated truth of it.

So, where do I go from here? He keeps asking for facts I can't give to him because I am not the world's best researcher, and it feels like a silencing tactic since I cant just point to something and say "Here, Here it is!"

What do I do now?

Thanks guys!

One thing that was mentioned that really made sense to me was the language that is used when referring to crime data collection. The FBI collects crime data and compiles it into a Uniform Crime Report. One category used in this report is "unfounded," which refers to those cases that were determined to be baseless and/or false. Baseless means it doesn't fit the definition of a crime, but could be true. False means an investigation proved the crime never occurred. Whenever news headlines mention "unfounded" allegations of sexual assault, they don't usually make the distinction between baseless and false, whcih can lead to a public perception that false reports are more common than they actually are.

Another important issue raised - the use of outdated, very flawed "scientific data" to cite false report statistics. There's one infamous "study" by Kanin, which took place at one police department in the Midwest, and the "false reports" were based on the opinions of detectives. Anyone who knows anything about statistics or research knows that this study could never be used in any field as reliable scientific data, yet people continue to cite the 41% of false sexual assault reports that the researcher supposedly found.

This ridiculous data, along with very little discussion about why someone might recant/make a false report, and about the feelings, emotions and reactions related to being a victim/survivor of sexual assault, likely makes it even more difficult for those affected to come foward.

Recent, valid scientific research has found that the number of false reports is most likely somewhere between 2 to 10%.

Thanks to the Sexual Violence Justice Institute at the Minnesota Coalition Against Sexual Assault for the information.

Any thoughts, comments or questions?

I live in Chicago and do not own a car. I take the L and bus everywhere, or I walk if it's in my neighborhood. A little over a year ago, I was sexually assaulted on a bus. Perhaps my current predicament seems silly in contrast with this example, and that is what makes it complicated. 

I have mulled this all over in my mind: am I bothered by the fact that on the way to a conference where I have been asked to share my research, I am being complimented on my looks (as if this person knows anything about my intellect anyway!)? Is it the fact that I have been programmed by my own attack and hearing stories of others to always be suspect and alert for men on public transport, and that the most innocent comment brings me back to the man who thought my leg was an appropriate masturbatory device on my commute home? Am I indeed making too much of this, taking these men as merely outgoing enough to communicate that they find me attractive, when I instead keep my attractions to myself? It seems hypocritical to spend any amount of time making myself presentable and then be upset when people notice. ... That sounded bad. I know that is eerily reminiscent of the "She was asking for it" argument a la a rape that occurred when a girl chose a miniskirt but again, in my situation, they are not expressing themselves in a highly sexualized, rude manner. So why is there still a nagging in my head that says something about this is off?

Perhaps, unfortunately for these well-meaning men, I'm tired of only being noticed when I drag my ass out of bed early to apply makeup and tame my hair. Perhaps I am distressed that what I really would like to be noticed for is something that cannot be immediately detected, and so I must settle for less substantive and more superficial compliments.

I feel as though now I'm rambling. :o) What are YOUR thoughts? 

What is the broadest definition of rape?  For instance, if there is one thrust of penetration and then you kick him off of you - was that rape?  What if the penis does penetrate the vagina but only gets part of the way inside and then you kick him off of you - was that rape? 

I used to define it as attempted rape, and then partial rape, but recently I've begun to think that it was actually rape.

What I want to know is at what point does sexual assault become rape?  The definition says forced sex, but what defines sexual intercourse?  Is the broadest definition for sex when the head of the penis can be felt in the vagina?  When the penis is half-way through, when the penis has completed a thrust?  Or after at least two thrusts? 

The reason I ask is because I want to know if I've been raped or sexually assaulted.  I've recently remembered an experience of feeling a penis inside of me and screaming/pushing/kicking him off.  I felt like I had stopped him from raping me at the time because it did not continue, but since I did feel the penis enter my vagina I'm thinking it's possible that it was rape.

There was some question as to whether or not it applied to the entire country, or just the state of Dehl.  Word out today (7/3/2009) suggests that it is for THE ENTIRE NATION!

Congratulations to the entire Indian nation!

While I didn’t grow up in the South Bronx, I grew up in the Deep South–New Orleans, LA. And, unlike Victoria, I never had the courage to be out in my small, all-girls, private high school. But my best friend did, and she and her girlfriend went to prom together and were met by complete acceptance by the other students and the school’s faculty.

When I finally came out to my classmates two years later, I was also greeted with a similar level of acceptance. I came out to my class after a night of drinking margaritas, showing up to the school’s most important event (the senior Nativity pageant) heinously drunk, and then going out to another bar. Though my coming out was definitely prompted by alcohol, coupled with the fact that I had decided to finally cut my hair off like a “real lesbian,” it was something that I had been ready to do for some time. The haircut, though, finally gave me the courage to do it, and that night as I announced in the middle of Fat Harry’s “Yeah, I’m gay, so what?” the computerized bar games that generally involved comparing pictures of naked men changed to comparing pictures of naked ladies, all for my sake.

My mother, however, has preferred to stay in a certain state of denial. And while you could make a strong argument that it’s just her fear of deviating from societal norms, I think it’s more than that. June 26th marked the 40th anniversary of the Stonewall Riots, which changed the course of LGBT history forever. It’s easy to look back and think that Stonewall’s impact on our lives can only be seen in the fact that we’re no longer hiding out in bars, I think it’s far more pervasive. Stonewall started our movement; and without Stonewall, there’s a good chance parties like The New Gay 's own Homo/Sonic would have to be completely underground, with raid lights on the ceiling to let us know the police were on their way.

Because of Stonewall and the hundreds of activists and fighters that came afterward, young LGBT people have been able to surround themselves with peers that don’t sneer at them because of their sexual preference, but embrace them. In an age where Stonewall and the events of the early gay rights movement can get lost in our own fight for marriage equality, it’s important to look back and remember how much was won in terms of social acceptance, and to thank the older members of our queer community for giving us that. Everyone needs to remember and honor their history, and it’s especially important for members of the LGBT community right now. During a time when it can seem like progress is impossible, it’s important to be able to look back and see how far we’ve come.

It’s true that most people in my high school class had no idea what the Stonewall riots were; I didn’t either until I went to college. But just because you don’t know about an event doesn’t mean that the messages from it aren’t disseminated across a culture. And that’s evident today, where young people of every race, socio-economic class and culture are seemingly more likely to embrace the LGBT community than the generation before them.

An Arkansas teenager and her mother are suing a private Christian high school over the treatment the daughter received when school officials learned she was pregnant.

According to the lawsuit, officials at Trinity Christian School badgered the teen into admitting her pregnancy, then expelled her on the spot with only eleven days remaining in the school year. After telling the student (who is not named in public court documents) that she was being expelled, school officials escorted her to a Christian pregnancy crisis center, where she was administered a pregnancy test and given counseling. Staff at the crisis center then shared information about the student with the school.

At no point during their questioning of the student or the trip to the crisis center did school officials contact the student's mother.

The lawsuit charges race and gender discrimination as well as false imprisonment and intentional infliction of emotional distress. The suit claims that other students who were known by the school to have engaged in sexual activity were not expelled.

From studentactivism.net

The part I'm having trouble swallowing... wait, scratch that. The principle called a minor into his office without a parent present, harassed her until she admitted the rumor was true, and then expelled her 11 days before school finished... then sent her to a CPC. The pregnancy center interviewed, counseled, and tested the minor and disseminated her information to the school employees.

Despite the fact that her pregnancy violated the school's code of conduct - which the girl and her parents signed on for when she enrolled - the school itself made some egregious errors in subjecting a minor to all of the above without parental consent. I hope the family gets every dollar out of the school that violated her civil rights. Additionally, if this case is won, the school will have to revamp its code of conduct as the clause that punishes sexual activity is only targeted at [pregnant] female students, and therefore gender-based discrimination.

One wonders if this will have an impact on other schools should the girl win her lawsuit...

People underestimate how very conservative liberal Indians can be when it comes to someone in their own backyard going against the norm. Beyond the stigma of being gay and therefore a criminal in the eyes of the law, homosexuals have to deal with being less than a person in the eyes of a society that is increasingly becoming less inclusive of the "other", be it religion, behavior, gender or sexuality. Lines have been drawn in the sand.

When Anbumani Ramadoss (the previous Health Minister) suggested decriminalizing homosexuality, not only did the Home Ministry tell him to not speak out of turn, the entire establishment told him to keep his trap shut. I have a lot of issues with Mr Ramadoss, but I respected him for speaking out. However, his motives had less to do with justice and fundamental rights and more to do with taking away some of the stigma surrounding AIDS.

The Delhi High Court's decision, however, talks about how Section 377 "criminalizes his or her core identity". The judgement also says criminalizing homosexuality based on moral grounds goes counter to equality. One assumes that this same argument would hold for gay marriage and adoption rights, but Indians still need to wait to hear from the legal system on those issues.

However, the High Court's decisions do not necessarily translate into Government action on this. The loud voices of the Hindu, Muslim and Christian leaders who shout that homosexuality is immoral and unnatural will carry some weight with the Congress-led government, especially since it needs the Christian and Muslim vote to remain in power, along with a lot of the Hindu vote.

I am hopeful, but not convinced, that this Government, safe for a while before the campaigning starts again, will strike down those parts of Section 377 that criminalize homosexuality. I think there's a long battle still ahead. And I can not wait to participate in it.

I feel guilt in not having participated in the struggle so far. I did not primarily because I was ignorant. I would like to think that is no longer true.

How do you explain to someone, especially a male who believes the world is just as sexist toward him as it is toward women, that the word "Feminism" does not imply any sort of inequality? I've tried to explain to many people, especially males, how Feminism is for everyone and stands to fight sexism in any form, as well as racism, classism, homophobia, etc., but they always seem to focus on that word, "Feminism", and dismiss it as equally... well, inequal.

If any of you have any suggestions, I sure would like to hear them.

If you would like to read the conversation that we have had so far, or maybe even supply your own input, go to: DeviantArt:SerenFae:I-Wanna-Know.

Now, I'm not putting down white male writers. But there are many wonderful writers who are subject to significant oppression, and choosing to promote already coddled and significantly advantaged writers disproportionately contributes to that problem. Our country and our world is filled with brilliant and illuminating writers who do not fit perfectly into Jon Meacham’s narrow idea of what the canon looks like.

In response to this list, I present:

50 Books for Post-Modern Times

One upcoming week in my blog , I want to collect perspectives on 50 works by writers whose bodies do not fit neatly into the canonical narrative. I want writers that reflect the issues of discrimination that we face today: writers of color, women writers, QLBTGI writers, disabled writers. I want writers who have shaped your feminist/progressive worldview. I want writers who “challenge the structure that would allow for domination of white male authorship.”*

So: who inspires you? I want to hear from the Feministing community. Give me up to five authors who face significant oppression. I’m especially interested in intersectional writers. There are no genre limitations. To contribute:

Leave a comment here with your submission and contact information, including why you love them, or
Leave a comment with submission and contact info in this entry at my blog, or
Email me at deeplyproblematic@gmail.com with your submission.

In your communication, tell me:

How they inspire you What they contribute to our cultural narrative

Everyone who contributes will be listed, quoted, and linked to when I post at least one of your submissions in the multi-entry list next week (or later, depending on how long it takes to get people to participate).

I'm excited to hear from you!

*Description by the excellent M of Ped Xing , who named this project.

On to the topic of my post.

I count Jodi Picoult novels among a guilty pleasure of mine.   In one such novel, The 10th Circle, a 14 year old girl is raped by her recently ex boyfriend while drunk at a party.  She even cites some seemingly true statistics (like, based on the amount of rapes that are reported, then the percent of the suspects that are arrested, then brought to trial, then convicted, then do jail time, roughly 94% of rapists walk free).

The story that unfolds is entirely too realistic . . . the girl is called a slut by her peers, insensitive comments abound, her parents' marriage falls apart, and a friend of the rapist actually encourages her to drop the charges because she 'knew she wanted it.'  The prosecutor tells her not to expect much from the trial, and she pretty much collapses into herself. 

My question is, how do we teach teenagers (male and female, queer, trans, all of the above) the nuances of valid consent, and how to respond when someone says that someone else raped them?   After all, the subject of consent is rarely, if ever, taught during sex education.  Prospective partners should want an ENTHUSIASTIC YES before engaging in any type of sexual activity.  Shouldn't we all want willing participants in our sexual adventures?  I think teenagers especially could benefit from this concept.  We should stop shaming them for having consentual intercourse and start making them feel bad for not respecting the bodies and autonomy of their peers. Not that I ever think shaming is appropriate or effective, but making teenagers (and everyone) think twice about rape can never be bad.

Furthermore, the average American seems to believe that it is entirely acceptable to quesiton someone who makes an accusation of rape, even when the evidence is blaring in their favor.

I found a few resources I wanted to share, but so far this is all I got.  Any thoughts?

Just Yell Fire

Scarleteen

I have more, but feministing limited me to two links. 

Thanks for reading, and please participate.  I need some ideas.