But I got back on sunday and haven't bothered to post anything new, which for all three of my readers is obviously devastating.

This week I have been having a great time at a local conference about the arts and worship. People far more creative than I have been exploring together how music, drama, art and dance can express the story of God. Yesterday was my favourite: Art.

I've posted a drawing I did some time ago here.

This new piece emerges from my reflections on Jesus' parable of the seeds. There is a great deal of insight contained in that story, but the phrase which caught my eye comes as some sort of a punchline:

"He who has ears to hear, let him hear." (Mark 4:9)

Mysterious words. Riddles. What could that mean? Enjoy the picture, post a comment I'd love to hear from all three of you. Oh, and apologies for the poor quality image. I had to use my phone camera.

So, what does Jesus mean? 'Let he who has ears to hear, let him hear'

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Lisa writes:

Kindness, gentleness, love, peace, joy. Would you be more likely to describe these character traits as “masculine” or “feminine”? If you answered “feminine,” you would not be alone — but you would be wrong. These are human traits — neither exclusively feminine nor masculine. Yet, our society and the church seem overly comfortable associating these attributes as feminine.

The Apostle Paul paints a picture of what the Christian ought to look like. One who is walking with God and is filled with the Holy Spirit will, according to Paul, be kind and gracious and peaceful and all the rest. I must agree with Lisa, though. Somewhere along the way, these have become values for women to aim for - not men.

It is a common accusation for Christians to be called weak. Weak for being patient, modest, avoiding conflict. Now, for many and especially men this accusation can sting. The attributes which are produced by the Spirit in the life of a disciple of Jesus can conflict with what a man expects of himself, or indeed what society expects of him.

So, in many mens ministries, the teaching is about how to be strong and courageous in a typically traditional sense. I endured read Wild at Heart and was somewhat shocked that masculinity was suddenly all about hunting and walking in the mountains and owning a big truck. Man was to 'cultivate' his wife and to make money for the household. Many others take this mentality, teaching men that masculinity is about having the power, controlling, dominating.

Being spiritual and Spirit-filled is then for the women. Making decisions and getting things done is for the men. The women can be gentle and kind and gracious. The men, however, should be 'leaders' which really means 'in power'.

The trouble is this: Power and authority don't seem to be the way of Christ. The accusations of Christians being weak are, frankly, legitimate. Christians are called to be servants. To bless and to care and to love. The world will call it weakness because they do not know the ways of God. We must affirm this as strength.

Christ must transform our views of gender, as he models for us what it looks like to be truly human. May the Church affirm in both men and women the work of the Holy Spirit as we are transformed into his likeness.

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"Oh no," I whisper to myself.

I'm standing in a vast room with a ceiling high above me. There are pillars to support it. I'm sitting in a stepped pew with places mared out with arm-rests. It's made of some dark wood, and seems very old. There is a lectern in front of me, facing towards the rear of the room. I was not facing the lectern but was perpendicular to it. It was comfortingly cool in this big, stone room. It was an attractive space. the paint looked fresh and colours were bright but tasteful.

"Oh no", I whisper.

I pick up the booklet with the words 'the daily eucharist written on the front.

It's more than a page long. It's more than two pages long. It may have been eight pages long!

Oh no. I thought this was going to be simple.

I feel I ought to confess something to you, today. It's a matter of grave importance and possibly even one's eternal destination. That weighty fact is this: I am a Baptist. For those who didn't instantly stop reading this blog, you should understand that Baptists have a few hang ups about liturgy. I remember hearing someone talk about a High-Church communion service as a 'ritual' which apparently meant it was void of any meaning, sincerity or Holy Spirit. Meanwhile we assure ourselves that the 20 minute worship set we endure enjoy each week is nothing of the sort.

You see, I was in a large cathedral in an old city in the north. It was a beautiful building, an a wonderfully peaceful place to be. I'd rocked up with a friend of mine apparently just in time for the lunch time Eucharist service. After being pointed in the right direction, we join the other five people who are participating in Communion.

So, little old Baptist me gets awfully confused when everyone else stands. I presumed it was a mere hiccup, and everyone else would be safely on their pews within moments. Then I realised they were standing to pray the opening words together. Oops.

This was the first of many mistakes. I managed to stand up at the right point around thirty percent of the time. I managed to follow the right words around fifty percent and there was a massively awkward fumble at the altar as we all stood in a circle around it.

Tragically, I had left my booklet over in the pew, thus I had no idea what the words were going to be for this part of the service. I managed to hold it together, by mumbling to myself in order that onlookers would believe I knew the words. Pro-tip: If you mouth the word 'watermelon', you can pretty much get away with not knowing the words.

Despite all this nonsense, confusion and unvcertainty on my part, we were still a group of Christians gathered together to partake of the Lord's supper. Together we received the... they call it bread? And of course the wine. The alcoholic kind, which would have been totally unacceptable in a Baptist setting! The body and blood. The meal Jesus shared with his disciples. And there was the renewed awareness of the things of God.

When Luther first administered Mass as a priest in the Roman tradition, he was so awestruck at the experience that he later wrote this:

‘At [the words of the liturgy] I was utterly stupefied and terror-struck. I thought to myself, "With what tongue shall I address such Majesty. . .Who am I that I should lift up my eyes . . ? At his nod the earth trembles. . . And shall I, a miserable pygmy, say I want this, I ask for that? For I am dust and ashes and I am speaking to the living, eternal and true God"!’

I think even as an irreverent Baptist could grasp something of the significance of the act of worship through the thoughtful, challenging and beautiful liturgy. It is good to meet with God at his table.

The moment was sort of ruined when, instead of returning to my pew I thought it was over and went to leave, causing me to lunge wildly towards the pew at the last second.

How funny, to find the majesty and beauty of God in a fumbled liturgy. He's gracious like that, though.

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There are probably studies which show that the 2008 Olympic Games saw a significant rise in the reading of Hebrews 12:1-2 in churches the world over. I'm pretty sure I heard at least four sermons on the passage over that summer. Why not? I saw. It's a great passage! Not bad for a book who's author we don't even know the name of.

Jesus is the goal for which we race, the prize for which we compete. He ran his race for the 'joy set before him' and we ought to do likewise. Of course the difficulty is in not finding that joy to be worth pursuing. Why have joy when I can have status? Money? Power? Authority? I could make it big. I could be somebody. I could take what I want. Yet we are told of some greater joy. It's a joy the world can't know, for it does not seek God and doesn't know the joy of union with him.

And it is that greater joy to which I am called. For which I run.

Now, after six years of walking with Jesus and all the various activities, programs and church stuff I have been involved with I have realised this: Resisting sin is still the hardest part of being a Christian. It can be dressed up, disguised and even ignored but one of the most significant parts of the life of a Christian is the constant battle against sin.

It doesn't end.

It's one of the things which levels the field for all believers: We're all running with endurance the race marked out. We're all throwing off the trappings of sin. We're all seeking the great joy for Which Jesus gave up his life.

It's a small comfort indeed that there is no one believer who is better than another.

The key I see in the scriptures over and over again for the overcoming of sin is that the Christian should find that there is something better than sin. That something is God and his great joy and wonder. Yet, unhelpfully, the church has so often cheapened grace that we don't see any point in pursuing God. There is nothing to stop us, for example: Preaching, leading worship, serving in mission and participating in most any part of the life of the Church.

As much as I am aware that God's grace accepts all who will come, regardless of their brokenness - indeed, that is my testimony as much as anyones - it doesn't help me believe there is a greater joy to pursue if those who are living sinful lifestyles are placed in positions of authority in the Church.

In a way, the Church can model the heavenly realities, demonstrating what the Gospel looks like. Paul gives a clear picture of those who ought to be in authority in the Church. I know I would find it more believable that there was a greater joy available if the Church's leadership looked like that.

"If they get away with with it, why should I bother?"

I expect you're reading this as legalism - as a set of rules for being a Christian which of course the things of faith are not. Yet those who are publicly associated with 'Church' ought to be those who live lives of integrity and honesty and humility. I think out of that heart of submission to God, there will come a righteous life, a holy life.

As one who is often in positions of Church leadership, I do endeavour to find joy in the task, as I find joy in Christ. Joy enough to resist sin and to walk in the way of the Lord.

God is good.

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Help me out here?

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The earth smiles.

A mother's frustrated child with a grumpy face,
She hastily zips the miniature jacket
Just in time.

The ground is as peace.

He sighs with hands on hips,
The darkening sky spoiling his run,
Homeward he turns.

The rocks are waiting.

Sunbeams are snuffed by smokey dense mass,
As the air stills, waiting.
The dark is welcome and cold is a friend.

To the dried and cracked earth,
There is no more welcome sigh than the gathering clouds
To the dead grass,
Brown and dusty.

The thirsting earth will be satisfied,
In the freezing deluge,
The sunshine hidden and warmth stolen.

How easy it is to despise discomfort,
And to wish for the sunshine.
When the greatest beauty is to be seen.

After the pouring rain.

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Shall we receive good from God, and shall we not receive evil? (Job 2:10)

Job is a really awkward story. If you've never read it, frankly I don't blame you. It's really long and somewhat tedious. Trust me on this: It's really awkward. When one reads the first part of the Old Testament, the Torah, one learns that when the people put their trust in God and walk in his ways, he will bless them. When the people turn from God he shall punish them. It's a pretty simple notion.

When we look through the pages of Job that theology is challenged. The premise of the story is this: Satan challenged God that Job only believes in him and worship him for all the blessings God has showered upon him. Indeed, Job is a very blessed man. He owns a lot of land, has a big family and is well respected. More importantly, he walks according to God's law. That means he gives to the poor, lends without demanding interest and is altogether loving to his neighbour.

So, Job is living a life pleasing to God and enjoys all the blessings associated with it. If you know Proverbs at all, you'll notice that Job is always quoting them, showing this man to be wise.

Anyway, in a rush of confusing and contradictory ideas, Satan is in the presence of God and God allows Satan to take everything away from Job. This raises several questions about God, namely: Isn't it a bit underhanded of God to use Satan to do his 'dirty work'. Additionally, one could ask is not God breaking his covenant with Job by cursing him when he should be receiving blessing? These and many other questions I shall ignore. I don't think that's where the text goes.

So, we are left with this awkward tension. Naturally, being me, I really enjoy Job.

This man who walks aright before God has been hit by the most astonishing, brutal suffering. The loss of his business, his family, health and reputation. In all of this he does not forsake God.

Now, Satan thinks that Job fears God because of the blessings God has given to him. It's a legitimate complaint - if someone offered you a free car for being their friend, wouldn't you hasten to be that man's best buddy? One of the ways the covenant can be interpreted is as some kind of Karma: If we are good, God owes us good. Job shatters that notion. This story takes a righteous man and has him receive all the curses promised to the unrighteous.

Worse still, God allows this to happen!

To my mind, Job asks the question "How do believers interact with personal suffering in the light of God's sovereignty?"

His initial response to suffering hints towards the right way to deal with suffering:

“Naked I came from my mother's womb, and naked shall I return. The LORD gave, and the LORD has taken away; blessed be the name of the LORD.” (Job 1:21)

"...Shall we receive good from God, and shall we not receive evil?” In all this Job did not sin with his lips.
(Job 2:10)

I wonder if you have ever been around Christians who believe that God doesn't ordain suffering? I've heard stories of people being rebuked because they thought it was God's will that someone should die from cancer. Indeed, when I am praying with others for the grace of physical healing, it is common to hear people speak against doubt - as if  God's blessing is somehow proportional to how much we believe. In some churches, they emphasise 'declaring' God's blessing against things which are not desirable.

Yet the righteous man, Job, does not react in this way. He doesn't 'declare' anything against the suffering he has endured. He accepts it as directly from the hand of God. He doesn't accept that he has a lack of faith. He is astonished when his friends rebuke him.

I think the tendency of all people is to view suffering as an assault on their kingdom - their lives which they have spent much time and energy building up. As Christians we are instructed to abandon our own kingdoms in favour of participating in God's. Yet, the way we can react to suffering and trial and loss indicates that we do not believe the kingdom to be God's. When we perceive death and disease to be totally outside the sphere of God's reign, we make God smaller and ourselves bigger. Just because something seem disastrous to us does not mean God sees it that way.

Indeed, if we only accept the good things of life as being from God we are suggesting that God is some sort of 'cosmic cash machine' from which we can withdraw all the time. God then becomes our servant. Our magical shower of blessing.

This is not how the Bible portraits God.

Of course it is equally tempting to assign the blame to God for our suffering and then walk away from him. For me, that has been a real struggle. Sometimes I have been so angry with God that I thought it a small thing to act in an abusive way towards others and myself as a way of 'getting back' at God.

Again, I was on the throne of my life and expecting God to do as I commanded.

The faith of Job is far deeper than this. His faith interprets his life as being in the hand of God.

For Job, God is God and is worthy of blessing in the midst of blessing and in the midst of loss. God has granted Job favour and he had blessed the Lord. The Lord allowed Job to lose everything, and still he had blessed the Lord. If we only bless God when things are going well for us, have we truly beheld God as the Almighty ruler who sits upon the throne?

I think what it means to walk with God is this: That God is on the throne and we must see our reality as though everything that happens is somehow ordained by the Lord. This is never an easy idea to accept, yet to me it seems biblical. When we accept all circumstances as being from the Lord, we see something more of his glory and his vastness, and maybe even discern something of his purpose for our lives.

He gives. He takes. Let us forever bless the Lord.

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O you who have grown weary of your load,
Shoulder it bravely again a little while
There will be those who may require of you
Help to go come first bewildering mile
With grief or pain. God will have need of you
As His interpreter that you may tell
Them the hope ahead, of the healing years,
And of his love. Oh learn the language well!

-Grace Noll Crowell

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Cheap grace is the deadly enemy of our Church. We are fighting today for costly grace.

The Cost of Discipleship by Dietrich Bonhoeffer is one of my all time favourite books.

Bonhoeffer was a Lutheran pastor in the first half of the twentieth century and was one of many German theologians who stood against the Nazi state, and particularly the way the Church was an instrumental part of that terrible system. He was executed in 1945 for being involved in a plot to assassinate Hitler.

His hard hitting opening remarks are like a prophetic voice for the contemporary Church:

Cheap grace is the preaching of forgiveness without requiring repentance, baptism without Church discipline, communion without confession, absolution without personal confession. Cheap grace is grace without discipleship, grace without the cross, grace without Jesus Christ, living and incarnate. (The Cost of Discipleship p. 6)

In the Church of his day, the practice was to declare people right with God, to justify their sins without seeing the sinner changed in any way whatsoever. So the state waged it's wars with the Church's blessing and the politicians played their games with people lives, knowing they were right with God and the man on the street is content to know that he shouldn't be any different from the world because grace has covered him!

Today's Church is quite different, you see. We don't even require baptism. It's as easy as a simple prayer.

I've attended plenty of Church services where a preacher will stand at the front and declare the forgiveness of sins re: John 3:16. Sometimes they will then invite people to respond. This usually means receiving prayer or repeating prayer line-by-line with the guy at the front. And then those who respond walk away. And their lives are no different.

For years I was in that place. I would make the sincere promises and pray heartfelt prayers and ask for the Holy Spirit to change my life. Walking away I'd be no different. So I began to go up more frequently and pray harder. Maybe I wasn't being sincere enough? I was assured of the forgiveness of my sins whilst still living in them. Looking back, I can see why that wasn't the way. I don't see Jesus doing that.

When Jesus is given a sinner to deal with, he saves her life and gives her the charge to 'sin no more'. His forgiving words are accompanied by a call. That's not the only time the forgiveness and call are received together. The famous 'woman at the well' receives grace and then sets to work telling others. Even the traitor, Peter, is restored to Jesus with the call to obey, to be his follower. Forgiveness, for Jesus, is tied with real-world transformation.

It is this which Bonhoeffer picks up on. For the grace of God is not just linked with the call to be a disciple: Grace is discipleship.

In many ways, that's what the preacher at the front was proclaiming - even without realising it. Their view of grace might be a commitment prayer.  A soul signed on the dotted line. But Jesus didn't do that. The grace he offered was a call to follow. Forgiveness as more than a comforted spirit - a redeemed life. Mercy which becomes viral.

No, we pour out our cheap grace over any who will hear. Worse still, we discourage people from following Jesus because it's all been accomplished by God anyway. Why walk in 'legalism' when all God wants to do is 'free' us. This cheap grace suffocates the Christian:

The only effect such a word could have on us [is] to bar our way to progress, and to seduce us to the mediocre level of the world, quenching the joy of discipleship by telling us that we were spending our strength and disciplining ourselves in vain (p. 13)

I see this all the time in my own life and in the lives of others. The attitude that it's ok to go out drinking because God has forgiven them, or that it's not a big deal if they sleep with someone they're not married to, that Jesus didn't really mean it is harder for a rich person to enter the kingdom of heaven than for a camel to go through the eye of a needle. Cheap grace pours water all over the flickering wick of the soul ignighted by the Holy Spirit.

It's so tempting, too. Grace for nothing? Forgiveness if I pray this prayer? And I can keep my stash of porn, because that wasn't part of the deal. And my marriage doesn't have to change - grace is free! In fact, I can look just like the rest of the world but because I have been forgiven by Jesus I get to go to heaven.

The smoking flax was mercilessly extinguished.

We are members of a Church which extinguishes the flame of passion which drives the believer to follow Jesus. You see it in the leadership structures when sin goes unchecked and everybody knows that the worship leader smokes weed, but nothing changes. Everyone knows that the Pastor has grown cold and distant from his family but there is no repentance. Each week he declares everyone in the room forgiven!

Cheap grace. Forgiveness for free.

What ought the congregation do, but assume that it's ok to be that way?

I know I have. I've been there - to think I was fine living in sin because, apparently, as long as I believed in Jesus I was safe. That's not what I saw when I took a look at Jesus. He walked the hardest path and called me to follow.

Let us put to death this cheap grace, this cancer in the Church and let us beckon the world to follow. Let us no longer announce forgiveness without condition, for it is clear that discipleship is the condition. All the while let us know that our discipleship is a gift of grace, and so is the forgiveness received through it.

Happy are they who know that discipleship means life which springs from grace, and that grace simply means discipleship. (p. 14)

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The Prosperity Gospel from The Global Conversation on Vimeo.

The Prosperity Gospel is the understanding that God wants his people to be rich, happy and healthy and true Christian faith results in these things. Faith is demonstrated by how much a believer is willing to give. Thus the greedy have typically loved to swarm into churches who preach this, a doctrine to comfort their idolatrous hearts.

Tragically, this teaching is very attractive to the destitute, who may  be willing to pay extraordinary amounts of money to receive 'blessing'.

Take a look.

Also, I'd recommend checking out the Lausanne Movement's website. Full of fantastic resources.

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