As a sensitive person, you feel things deeply. You experience a more subtle and complex world than many others do.

This can feel like a blessing and a curse. Yet I believe it is something to accept. I don't believe it's something to overcome.

But by accepting it, I mean that you determine for yourself what you want out of life and out of yourself, your skills, your abilities, your experiences -- given a realistic understanding of your talents and your limitations.

The difference between acceptance and overcoming can sound very subtle. Believe me, I know!!!

But if you want to be authentic, then you need to accept your more refined nature. And find ways to make it work for you. Not against you.

It's an amazing shift to know this is who you are. You can stop hiding and trying to act tough. (Many people probably already see your sophisticated nature anyway, if they are paying attention.)

It is an amazing sense, like coming home, to embrace that you love the richness of your inner world, you love to cultivate your self-awareness, you love to learn new ideas and feel inspired.

This is your true self and once you accept this, it ironically becomes easier to express yourself because you're not trying to be someone you are not and you feel secure allowing your words and actions to come from your true sensibilities, your deep, rich, thick experience of life.

Happy holidays to you, my dear reader. I am off tomorrow, so I will see you back here next Monday, December 28th. Warm wishes and a big hug to you. With love, sarah

Okay, I'm gonna just say it...the desire to express yourself authentically is a sign that you are yearning to know your purpose.

Do you believe that you and every other person has a unique purpose and expression?

Do you believe that just as a hammer is designed to drive nails into a wall, that you are designed to do a specific and particular thing too?

This question is deeply on my mind, as I was listening to an interview with Tim Kelley, a coach who helps executives to find their purpose. I just love that. Helping high-powered CEOs, CFOs and Managing Directors to find their life purpose!!!

Tim talks in such a matter-of-fact way, that it is truly calming. And it doesn't seem so crazy or woo-woo to yearn, to pine, to want to know your purpose.

Listening to Tim, it seems perfectly natural and essential to want to understand what your innate gifts are. Those gifts that you are designed to express (like the hammer is designed to drive in nails).

And at the end of the day, being practical is just part of life, it's already a given, just as you need air to breathe and food to eat. You know this already. But that does not mean that survival motivations alone can sustain you over the long-term.

The yearning for a sense of purpose and fulfillment inevitably comes. And that is really the search for your unique gifts, the place where your authenticity resides and your authentic self-expression sprouts from.

While there may be an inner battle going on inside of you (as we talked about yesterday), as you walk this path of authenticity, a battle between the desire to purely and freely express yourself -- the way an artist does -- and the desire to be practical, effective and successful in a competitive, money-driven and judgmental world -- as a sales person does, there is a way to be grounded and real and practical, no matter what desire is driving you.

To be grounded, real and practical, try doing this: Identify specific actions and behaviors, get rooted and clear about what you are doing and want to do, the specific things you want to say or do or are saying and doing. In this way, you are being real -- as in rooted and aware and conscious in the physical, external world. That's very practical. It's action based, and you are not off in an imaginary fantasy world of your mind. This is real stuff and you are doing it.

In her book, "Life Is A Do-Over," Cindy Clemens says: "Personal values and priorities...are the interactions and behaviors that feel right to you and bring you a sense of wellbeing. They are what you know for sure to be true for you, deep in the core of your being."

I love that. Read it again: "Personal values and priorities...are the interactions and behaviors that feel right to you and bring you a sense of wellbeing." This statement brings together the ephemeral qualities of your heart's desire but is about the physical, real world.

What interactions and behaviors feel right to you? Get really specific. What are you doing? Who are you with? What are the topics of conversation? This is where your heart's desire lies -- and it's realness, alright, in the physical world.

I've been writing these posts everyday for about 3 months now.

And one question, that I continually find myself asking, is: Is the yearning for authentic self-expression an artistic, creative desire? A desire for pure, raw, unedited expression in some creative form? Where there is no particular desired outcome? Where the goal is just the act of expressing in and of itself?

Or does this desire really come from an insecurity, a desire to look good? Or a genuine desire to be more effective, to want to do good work? Is it then, in this way, a practical, pragmatic desire? Not about expression per se, but about finding a way to fit oneself into the world and how it operates in a practical, realistic way? Where it's not about raw expression, but about developing ways that are effective and work well in different settings, at work, at home, with friends?

Of course it can involve all of the above. Yet I find myself wondering, is this just about needing a venue to just express, with no expectations, just pure flow of whatever comes? Is this what an artist feels like?

Or is this desire for authentic self-expression really about wanting to be more effective in the world, at work, with people, etc.? Is this what a salesman feels like?

Where are you coming from in your own search? Are you focusing more on creative self-expression? Or are you wanting to find more practical ways of being effective with people and creating certain results and outcomes? Or is it a combination of both? A kind of balancing of the two worlds perhaps?

What creative or fun activity would you like to do?

Be like a kid and just play!!

To be authentic and connected to yourself, you must be able to let lose and play!!

This past week, I went to my first hip hop dance class ever. And it was a blast!!

Yeah, I didn't get all of the steps and who knows what in the heck I looked like!! But you know what!!?? It was a blast!!

It was a time to let go of my thinking mind and let my body move.

The music was great. We laughed and smiled. My body woke up. And I felt FREE for an hour. I gave myself total permission to just go, look like a fool, enjoy the music, have a good time and let my body and mind try this new thing!

Try something new and fun. It will refresh and revive you. You'll feel alive again!!

And what the heck, you can practice your skill of permission, of giving yourself permission to try and learn and mess up and look however you look.

If you can use this skill, there is no fear you cannot face.

When meeting new people or being in a group, do you feel uncomfortable talking about yourself?

I totally understand this. And what's coming through to me now, more and more, is that if this is true for you, then there's one or more of these things going on for you (which one or ones is it??):

-- Perhaps you need to give yourself *permission* to talk about yourself and what you're up to, what you're good at, etc. And this one is deep, obviously, because the implications of giving yourself permission to be "the kind of person who" can present yourself well means that you're changing how you think of yourself on an identity level. You're a different kind of person now. And this may be a big upgrade of sorts in your self-image (yippee!!)

-- Or maybe you might need a little bit of how-to advice on how to speak about yourself and what you're doing or how you can help or what results you're creating, etc. You might need some help on the actual words or ideas you'd like to communicate. You may need to just put some thought into it. What would you like to say?

-- Or perhaps you just need more real-time practice actually talking about yourself in a way you like and feel good about. The more you do it, the more comfortable you will be doing it. And really the only way to move forward here is to do it, to get more experience, to put in the time.

-- Or perhaps you are actually not doing what you genuinely, authentically want to do in your life or you are not genuinely and authentically being the person who you really want to be in your life. If this is true for you, then how can you ever feel proud or excited to talk about yourself? This is where you need to re-assess your life, pull back all of your assumptions and figure out who you really are underneath the layers of who you learned you had to be. This is time to start finding things you want to do and be that you are excited about!

-- Or perhaps you are following your dreams and having at least some of the success you want, yet you feel insecure for some reason or your success doesn't feel solid. If this is the case, then you probably need to go back up to one of the first three points.

So what do you think?? What's going on for you?

Admitting to yourself, or to someone else who can be supportive, that there are inner blocks holding you back from your self-expression is essential.

It is shockingly easy to spend much of your life, hiding, plodding along or even seeking growth and learning, success and self-expression, yet still come to find that there are small and large pockets of your inner experience which you have never fully realized (a.k.a avoided). And that because they have never fully been realized, they may have blocked you from much of what you have wanted to do.

But the fear is really about the resistance, the unwillingness, the fear around articulating what's going on inside. Yet this is the first step you must take in order to grow in the ways that are most meaningful and will have the most impact on creating the awesome life that you want.

Today I am feeling deeply humbled that in order to be authentic, you must truly have your Self in good shape.

You must feel good about yourself. You must experience yourself as good just because you're alive -- apart from any skill and ability -- and be able to access and apply that experience when and where you need to. You must also know that you can (if you so choose) rely on that sense of being good and be able to go through the learning process of developing a skill and ability -- before you're any good at it, so that you can get good at it!!

These are the concepts of self-esteem and self-efficacy that I wrote about here recently.

These are the precious gems of your self-concept that are requirements for a healthy sense of self -- as a being who is happy, effective, and capable in this world.

I guess what I am saying is that a healthy, strong sense of self is essential for authenticity. It is essential for self-expression. (It really is not optional.) Because you need to have this, in order to be seen and heard by other people, to try and maybe fail, to get whatever reaction you get from others, and to not beat yourself up inside during the process.

I believe that every person deserves this sense of self inside of them, so that they can grow and explore and learn and follow their creativity, their desires and their instincts. So that they can express and speak, research and communicate, explore and question. A human being is truly not a complete being without this ability. A problem in your self-image is a major roadblock to the fullness of who you are, your creativity and your freedom.

I believe that every person deserves this healthy and strong sense of self inside of them, as much as they deserve food, water and shelter. This is a human right, I believe.

This is what I stand for, and this is why I'm communicating with you right now.

Your authenticity shines through no matter what. It'll eventually spill out in some way.

Maybe in the way you put your clothes together. Maybe in the way you prepare food.

Maybe in the way you speak. Maybe in what book you buy or what movie you want to watch.

It's kinda hard actually to not be authentic in some aspect of your life. What small, small things do you do that are true expressions of your heart?

What are some ways that your natural energy and desire gets expressed? Describe it. Name it. What are some authentic qualities of your energy? And how would you like to expand your expression of them in other parts of your life?

One of my favorite coaches for creative people, Tama Kieves, talks about how we know how to follow the established path. The path of going to school to get the grades, getting the grades to get the career, getting the career to get the paycheck. These are the obvious hoops to jump through. And you can pretty much see where you're going and what you need to do.

But the authentic, creative path of authenticity is something that comes from inside of you. It is not out in the world as an established path you can follow. Instead it is more like an interactive process between your heart and the external world. And it unfolds.

It just blows me away how Tama talks about how your inner voice will never tell you what to do with your whole life. It speaks to you moment to moment. So you must tune into it and learn to trust it moment to moment. Wow -- that's not easy! eh?