This one-step forward, two steps backward is so frustrating. I guess in these instances, one just needs to push through it and carry on. The problem lies in that my head isn’t in it, and I’m looking for some kind of “On” switch.

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And just as quickly, after a week of running a mile a day with a bit extra most days, I was sidelined with a terrible cold, the first this year I’ve caught from Steve. He always brings this home from his job where the ever-decreasing size of office space sees employees working practically one on top of another. Most of his coworkers have young children and with children, especially this time of year, comes colds.

We both thought he was suffering with allergies – we had just had three beautiful dry and sunny days in a row and he did a bit of yard work just before coming down with serious sniffles and sneezing. Too late, we realized it was more serious.

After several days of complete bed rest in which I never left the bedroom and Steve slept downstairs, I’m upright but with slight tightness in my chest. Significantly reduced this time around were sinus issues that usually keep me from exercising for weeks after the initial cold abates. I attribute that to my enforced lack of dairy in my diet. I have a bona fide dairy allergy and limit my intake anyway but I had no idea how much elimination alone could reduce my symptoms and get me back on my feet faster than ever. I was able to pound out forty pushups yesterday and today with a smidge of triceps and biceps work thrown in because it felt right.

I have a couple of low-key events I must attend over the weekend and I’ve been struggling with foregoing both based on how I feel. There will be repercussions later in the year if I beg off so I’m going to buck up and make appearances. If I were feeling as poorly as I was a couple of days ago, my decision would be a no-brainer. No sense putting anyone else’s health at risk. But I’m over the worst and feeling much better and who knows? I might even be back on the treadmill again as early as next week.

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After the half mile, during the tail end of I feel a bit wheezy not that I don’t during a mile-long run anyway – I am an asthmatic after all – it’s just that it seems to come on sooner than that last glorious week of running perfectly.

Possible triggers: 1) Lately, I’ve been allowing two of our pets to sleep in our usually off-limits bedroom during the day hours. I do have a slight allergy to our pets and although I lint-roll the blankets before retiring each evening and we vacuum in there twice a week, it’s possible that fur dander is building up and irritating my lungs, causing me to wheeze a bit in the mornings and earlier in my noontime run.

I should probably end the habit of allowing pets to sleep in our bedroom. They do have their own bedroom.

2) Because I have a dairy-allergy (NOT lactose-oriented) that also can make me wheezy and feel bloated, I avoid most dairy most of the time. I do know my outside envelope on consuming dairy and dairy-laced products and I read labels religiously to know what those might be. Since January 10th of this year, I haven’t consumed one iota of dairy.

I know dairy consumption isn’t the problem with my recent inability to run a mile a day.

3) Overeating: This is more than likely the culprit mixed with more than just a bit of number 4 described next. Portion size continues to plague us. I’ve said it before and here I’m stating it again: I wouldn’t know a correct portion size for me if it slapped me on my backside and called me Betty. Worse still, I doubt I could stick to a Carole-sized portion without giving serious thought to chewing off my own arm before four p.m. every day. That would be even after drinking yet another low calorie protein shake.

I need to seriously work on not overeating. It’s a mental thing more than anything.

Lastly, 4) I’ve been under a huge amount of stress lately with my writing and home life and have been comfort eating in lieu of wanting to work out. I haven’t been eating comfort foods – we refuse to buy those or having any in the house. Comfort eating for me is overeating anything currently being served. I make dinner ninety-nine percent of the time here at home; Steve cooking the other one percent of the time because of his job and his own stress issues, and lately, I have not been able to get back into the habit of dividing cooked meals into two dinners worth of food. My mind and my stomach simply do not care and without much thought, I’ll eat enough for two dinners sized for about three people. Instead of two soft tacos, I’ll consume six. Instead of a salad plate-sized salad, I’ll heap high a large dinner plate’s worth.

Numbers 3 and 4 are so intertwined one seems as much like the other that it’s hard to separate them. Yet I do because I know myself and my mental weaknesses.

I’m not sure that these two items are positively the culprits stealing my ability to run a mile a day but clearly, they are problems I have identified and need to work on. In the meanwhile, I’ll continue to try to discover the problem and will continue to try to get back to running a mile a day.

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I believe you are what you eat. Overall, I eat well and reasonably clean. We fix all our meals here at home using little processed food – plain black coffee and canned plain black or white beans being the exceptions. We consume two vegetarian meals a week. Since I seem to have issues around eating grains – flour and flour products, whole wheat anything, quinoa, and rice, I personally try to limit my intake of those to just a few times a week.

Fresh, raw vegetables are a big hit around here. We love ‘em, we eat ‘em and we definitely shy away from overcooking them. We don’t eat beef and lean more toward chicken, turkey, and fish with the occasional pork tenderloin thrown in. I suppose all these meats could be considered processed since we didn’t catch or butcher any ourselves.

My dinner last night was a big Portobello mushroom sautéed in Worchester sauce and homemade chicken stock with one quarter of a large acorn squash (microwaved and plain) and two cups of fresh chopped salad w/o dressing, croutons, or nuts. A tall glass of plain water rounded out the meal (we’re not big on desserts). Later, over writing homework, I sipped a tiny glass (about a quarter cup) of port.

Good eating. Reasonably clean (if you removed the Worchester sauce, almost completely clean). Our problem, as I see it in regards to eating, continues to be portion size. We can really pack it away and unfortunately, we do. Always.

I take vitamin D every other day, a Krill oil every other other day, and a Resveratrol daily. Three out of five days last week, I ran one mile straight and walked a third of a mile. And I wrote a lot and talked a lot with Steve about my writing goals.

Rinse and repeat to get the same results tomorrow? I’d really like to rise from bed feeling this good and rested again.

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A dozen images raced through my mind at the question. Me, running, plodding onward, trying to find something to calibrate how much longer I was going to put myself through this, this, this thing I thought I might want to do someday. Me, sweating and my lower lip and jaw gone tingly and numb like it does at the three-quarter mile mark like clockwork. Me, pulling and tugging at my definitely not running-style summer shorts that make my underwear go places best left unspoken of.

So I answered as astutely as possible and said, “Uh. Hmm, don’t know?”

The truth is I don’t know when, if ever, I’d run in a marathon. Quite honestly, until very, very recently in fact, I didn’t know anything about marathons. It wasn’t anything I thought much about. Remember, I’m not a runner.

So, to prove further to myself that I’m not a runner interested in potentially running and finishing a small marathon some day before I reach 60, I poked around a bit on a website that had registration information for a local spring marathon and was relieved to see there is an actual thing as a 5K distance. That’s not just a clever name. I know that sounds ignorant but that’s how much I don’t know about running. We all have to start somewhere, right? 5K is just a bit further than three miles. Whew! I can barely run a single mile at once, on a good day, and when life drama doesn’t derail everything.

The website showed lots of pretty pictures of runners, um, running and the first thing that popped to mind, after yet again denying I might someday consider myself a runner, was the comfortable clothes everyone was wearing.

Truly, I wouldn’t know where to start with this. I’ve never been a clothes person, let alone a sport clothing person. When I run on my treadmill located in the quiet, hidden comforts of my home, I run wearing Levis’ shorts cinched up with a cheap leather belt. I wear the only bra I own that has a “racer-back” so the straps don’t fall down my shoulders. I wear a sleeveless, cotton/polyester top that has tiny holes woven in it that I choose to believe keep me, due to my naturally poor cooling system, from exploding into flames.

The one good thing I wear to run in are honest-to-god running shoes that the awesome people at Fit Right NW set me up with, not once, but twice after I wore out my first pair (oh, be quiet you!).

My eyes finally settled on the final thing that would keep me from running in a marathon anytime within the next few years – the cost.

I don’t know why but I never thought running in a marathon would cost anything. Sure, shoes, proper clothing (I’m still lost on that one), a bottle of water maybe, and yes, I understand now nothing is free and someone has to pay for putting a marathon on. I just never thought of that before. I read that registered runners often get a commemorative t-shirt (this I’d never wear) and a photo (this I really would avoid looking at) and if one wanted to pay extra, a medallion (this would be worth running, but sadly, not to pay extra for in my opinion). I guess runners are okay with paying for bringing the pain? In a perfect world, shouldn’t onlookers pay for that? Oh wait. Running is supposed to be fun. I keep forgetting this.

Sadly, our budget won’t allow for such things like paying to run in a marathon. We’re strapped for cash more now than we’ve ever been. Even under my “draconian” reign at budgeting (we take turns for five year stretches), funds to do such won’t be available for another two-three years.

Nothing to be sad about here. This gives me lots of time to prepare and learn all I need to know to eventually participate in such an event, even if I’m not really a runner.

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