Five of Us (plus a little crazy)

I really did move...

2012-01-13T20:49:00.000-05:00

...and not that you all would notice much if i didn't show up here ever again... ;) but head over to http://allisgraceforme.wordpress.com. i write there every once in a while (much more often than here). things have been a little touchy in the Mattison-Frazer household lately...just giving you the heads-up. i might beat around the bush a little bit...but you'll forgive me, right? and sometimes...well, i don't. tonight, i'm not. it's all there. for the world to read. yikes. (like the world reads it. ha.)

would love to have you follow me over there. and, you know. leave comments. it's more fun when it's a conversation and all.

Wordpress?

2011-11-21T17:00:00.001-05:00

Will you follow me if I go to word press? (Hehe...are any of you following me any more as it is?? I know I haven't been super consistent lately...forgive me!)

I haven't figured it all out yet, but I'm working on it, and importing from blogger was pretty simple...even the comments came along for the ride...what do you think? I'll make it so you can follow me there too. :)

All Is Grace

I kind of decided that "five of us" didn't really fit all that well with who we are...who I am...any more. For a while I could justify it since we had Chani and all...but then we added Maisie into the mix...hehe...and it didn't work again. Since I can't change the address of this blog, and I really like some of the features that wordpress offers (though if any of you are brilliant and can help me figure out how to use a theme that isn't quite so canned and ugly as the ones I'm finding on the wordpress site, that would be fantastically helpful), I thought I'd jump in there.

I'll post in both places for a while to see what I think...but I'm thinking I'm going to change. Leave me a comment to let me know if you're coming along! Or if you're not!!

FancyLittleThings

2011-11-17T15:00:00.000-05:00

I can't seem to pull it together here, friends...and for that I apologize...but it has been a full couple of weeks over at FLT...and I'm posting there again today. I would love for you to go check out my friends' words again...(and if you need further proof that I can't actually write anywhere, hehe, feel free to read my admission of that in my post this week). Check us out here.

Happy Thursday-before-Thanksgiving! I hope you are finding so many reasons to be thankful this month...I am. Indeed.

Posting at FancyLittleThings...

2011-11-03T13:45:00.000-04:00

Yep, I'm doing it again. And hoping to send you all there...not really to read my stuff, but to check out the other inspirational women who write there. :) I won't be posting the same post here, but I'll give you a little teaser...at FancyLittleThings, the month of November focuses on giving thanks. The authors are reading Ann Voskamp's One Thousand Gifts and working on our lists of 1000 things that we're thankful for in our everyday lives, and digging into the writer's take on what being thankful does in the bigger picture. It's a pretty amazing read, and has me reading and re-reading and highlighting and thinking. And writing a long, long list.

Hope it inspires you! Here's the link to my latest post. (And make sure to click on the FancyLittleThings banner to take you back to the home page and see what my friends have written the past two days as well--there will be new thankful lists/posts daily!)

And today's procrastination...

2011-10-28T12:59:00.002-04:00

...comes in the form of the most ridiculously adorable slippers...yikes. they come together quick. too quick. because it's all i want to do...and can justify saying, "oh, they come together so QUICKLY!!"

hehe.

here they are:

and here are the links:

Slipper Tutorial (please note, the video demonstration makes slippers the size of doll shoes. if you adjust the numbers of stitches and then play with the number of rounds according to the size of the child's foot, you're get something that looks more like a kid slipper. to make slippers for a 2-year-old, about a size 5, i started with 16 stitches in the hdc foundation chain, made 3 increase rounds, two hdc in each stitch rounds, and then 3 decrease-the-toe rounds. the mary jane strap is just another hdc foundation chain with a 12 chain loop at the end to go around the flower)

Big Flower Tutorial

Tiny Flower Tutorial (this tutorial is done with UK crochet terms, but she translates them into US terms)

hooray for pinterest!! ok. now. i seriously have to go make a cake.

hehe.

Today's Pinterest Adventure...

2011-10-26T14:54:00.003-04:00

So...I followed this link...for a Salted Caramel Mocha. Hehe...umm, yes please. About twice a week, I indulge in coffee craziness...almost always when Philip is here on Thursdays, and often on Wednesdays when I don't keep the baby. I don't know what it is about not having that responsibility and feeling the need to splurge...but the recipe looked fantastic. All except one thing...well, three things...1) I am lactose intolerant. Butter and heavy cream and milk? Yikes. 2) I'm not big on mocha. And 3) I didn't have any heavy cream in the house. Now, if you're going to whip up heavy cream, you can't use a substitute, but...if you just need the heaviness of the cream, you can sometimes get away with it. So, instead of the 1/4 cup of heavy cream in the recipe for the caramel sauce, I used 1/4 c. of almond milk and an extra tablespoon of butter, melted and mixed with the almond milk prior to adding it to the sauce. To say that leaving out the cocoa powder (thus, turning it into a salted caramel...umm...cappuccino??), and substituting almond milk for the frothed milk and heavy cream resulted in the yummiest drink I've had...all month...might be an understatement.

Yum.

So, here are the pictures...and yes, I only made a single serving, where the picture in this person's blog shows what must be a double...I had to make sure it was yummy before I ruined perfectly good espresso. ;)

Espresso. Yes, I already poured it into the mug before I took this picture. The leftover will be consumed sans caramel. :)

Almond milk does indeed froth.

Yep, poured the unfrothed almond milk allllllll over the counter (most of it made it into the mug).

With a little extra caramel drizzled over the froth--I skipped the whipped cream...I usually do.

Here's the recipe... :) Have fun!

Salted Caramel Mocha

1 shot of espresso or 3/4 cup coffee
1 1/2 – 2 tablespoons caramel sauce (see recipe below)
1-2 tablespoons cocoa powder (the hot chocolate kind, not the unsweetened baking kind – I used Archer Farms dark chocolate cocoa and loved it)
Pinch of sea salt
1/2 cup milk
Whipped cream (optional)
Extra caramel sauce and sea salt to drizzle/sprinkle on top

With an espresso maker:

Prepare espresso. Place caramel sauce, cocoa powder and sea salt in a mug and pour espresso over them. Froth milk and slowly pour into mug, stirring to combine everything. Taste and add more caramel, cocoa and/or salt to taste. Top with whipped cream, drizzle caramel sauce, and a tiny pinch of sea salt.

Without an espresso maker:

Prepare coffee. Place caramel sauce, cocoa powder and sea salt in a mug. Pour coffee into mug, stirring to combine everything. Heat milk in microwave or on the stove and add to mug, stirring everything to combine. Taste and add more caramel, cocoa and/or salt to taste. Top with whipped cream, caramel sauce and a tiny pinch of sea salt.

Salted Caramel Syrup

Makes enough for around 3-4 salted caramel mocha or hot chocolate beverages

1/2 cup sugar
3 tablespoons salted butter, cubed
 1/4 cup heavy cream, at room temperature

In a medium saucepan, cook the sugar over medium heat, stirring occasionally with a spatula (if it becomes lumpy, reduce heat and refrain from stirring). When it turns a deep amber color*, add the butter and stir until it is melted. Add the heavy cream and whisk until the caramel is smooth (be careful, it will bubble up when you add the cream). Remove from heat and let cool. Refrigerate extra syrup.

(Mindy's note...*it can burn at this point--just a warning. burnt caramel isn't quite as yummy as non-burnt. be careful!!)

New Endeavors

2011-10-25T08:07:00.006-04:00

Yesterday, I posted here, and hope to be involved once a week or so in different ways...I will write as the "Health and Fitness Author" while Ruth, the real health and fitness girl has her baby and adjusts to life with her first littlie. I would love if you would stop by and check it out...more because the blog speaks to me every time I read it than because I'm writing there. Whether the article is about family, marriage, faith, decorating, style, or whatever it speaks about...it speaks to me. This month, the focus was on friendship...in marriage, in life, with God. Next month, we focus on thankfulness, and the book One Thousand Gifts, by Anne Voskamp...I'm about 3 chapters into it and I'm loving it. Definitely worth the time. It has opened my eyes...to gifts I have ignored. I'd love to know what you think.

So stop by...and check it out. :) FancyLittleThings.com

The Homeschool Mother's Journal

2011-10-20T11:45:00.000-04:00

I know I do these things all the time...but...I keep reminding myself that I write this blog more as a reminder of what I have done in a week (a month), what I have done with my kids...not necessarily to be inspiring or brilliant or...well, anything remotely like that. Hehe...because I aim to be those things, but then reality strikes. :) So, my friend Kendra has been including this in her blog lately...and I love it.

In my life this week...A new devotional, thanks to my son, who knew I wanted something new and got it for me for my birthday. Grace for the Moment, by Max Lucado. The Morning and Evening edition. Also, I'll be writing on another blog starting this week...I'm terrified and excited all at the same time. This week's entry is pretty tame...kind of set up like this post, actually.

In our homeschool this week...We started talking about slavery. Which...I don't think has really hit my kids yet. But when we start the read aloud--Amos Fortune, Free Man...I think it will.

I am inspired by...my son's enthusiasm to build and create. My daughter's excitement about acting and organizing plays with her cousins. Reasa's love for helping.

Places we're going and people we're seeing...we're going to Bath to do Karate. :) All of the cousins and aunts and uncles will be at my parents' on Sunday for our annual pumpkin carving photo shoot. On Monday, we're headed to the zoo, to claim Reasa's reward points for her chore chart.

One of my favorite things...How planning for our Halloween costumes has become all about research and learning about the characters. Not exactly school, but...fun.

What's working/not working for us...Trying to get all of our chores done before school begins is not working. I need to be more diligent about setting a timer, and starting schoolwork when I say we will start. This method drags the day out too much, and we wind up doing Math at a time when the kids don't function well.

Questions/thoughts I have...It amazes me how different my children are in the work that they do. I know they are different...I know they work differently...gosh we've been doing this for 9 years...but the differences still blow my mind. And sometimes frustrate me to no end. ARGH!

Things I'm working on...diligence. Consistency. Being intentional. Keeping the kids on task. Helping them become more independent with their work.

I'm cooking...black bean soup. Sausage and shells. Zuppa Toscana. Baking a wedding cake for a friend I've known since she was born. Crazy.

I'm reading...One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp. The first chapter tore me up. I have to re-read it.

I'm grateful for...enough.

I'm praying for...inner peace. I know that sounds trite. I'm dead serious.

A photo to share...

Reasa...helping me. Homeschool happens in lots of ways.

Click on the graphic at the beginning of this post to see more posts by homeschool moms.

A couple I forgot about...

2011-10-17T21:29:00.003-04:00

It's not straight...or lined up...or perfect...but I loved it.

Just a simple little bag with a ruffle and a flower added. Laine claimed it the moment she saw it...

The link for that one... :)

It's a little scary around here. Don't even get me started on the cakes...or the crochet ideas...

And the madness continues...

2011-10-17T20:42:00.000-04:00

Just did this...hehe...

Shrug!

The shirt I started with was a men's xl long-sleeved v-neck from Old Navy...only...I got it for $1.50 at the Thrift Store last week...Next time, I'll start with something maybe a size larger than what I would normally wear...and it would work equally well with a women's shirt--probably better. I had to mess with the lines on this one a bit too much so the shoulders don't fall quite in the right place--had to take the side seams in about 3 inches so they would fall right, and the sleeves came in an inch and a half or so. In all? 15 minutes, friends. :) I'm going to get a ribbon that matches better...the actual color is kind of an olive-y brown...super comfy...I kind of love it.

Here's the shrug link.

More Pinterest...

2011-10-17T19:22:00.002-04:00

...from a few days ago. Because, you know. I have nothing better to do.

Actually this has become my favorite method of procrastination.

There are worse things, right?

A quote I found...it is on the wall in my bedroom now.

Scrap fabric and fun patterns make my day.

Matching tiny clutch...

Here are the links I happily found on pinterest...

Audrey Hepburn quote

Plaid Purse (with free pattern)

Tiny Clutch--was just a picture, actually, from the linked blog...I kind of drew it up and threw it together...but it was inspired by pinterest!! ;)

Pinterest. It's an obsession.

2011-10-17T19:06:00.003-04:00

It's not an addiction, folks. An addiction implies that I would choose not to do it anymore if I could.

This is just not the case.

I am having more fun with this as a creative outlet, doing little things every day that are fun. Inexpensive. Creative. Crafty.

Brilliant organizational ideas. Adorable gifts and thoughtful things. Purses. Bags. Recipes.

Basically, I'm in my glory.

So, since I've been in a bit of a blogging rut...I figured I'd blog a few of the things I've found and done. :) Today...

Mod Podge.

I am not a Mod Podge girl. I don't craft like that most of the time...until today. It's just not my thing, really. I'm more of a fabric/yarn/paper crafter. I realize that mod podge incorporates all of those things sometimes...I just haven't gone there in the past. Then I discovered this project. And I needed Mod Podge for this project. And I realized...I saw that pinned on somebody's board not too long ago.

Hehe.

I am starting with a modified version of that project (smaller pictures, larger canvas) to see if it works, honestly.

Hehe...not quite dry...

Also not dry...but love it. I have no patience.

I can't wait to try it with full-sized photos on large frames. Like...10x13. For, like...Christmas gifts. So that the edges of the pictures don't show. :) :) :)

But so far...it works. And I love it. And the Mod Podge recipe is here.

But seriously...spare time?? Yeah. Not so much anymore.

Like there was any to begin with.

Ha.

picture proof.

2011-10-13T18:53:00.001-04:00

Lunch. :) 38 different foods.

Heian...kick-Bryson-in-the-face. 38 katas.

.8 home improvement projects. The kids painted them...I am still not sure what I'm going to do with them. :)

380 Crunches. (and a bag of red sequins allllll over the horrid carpet. And no clutter removal prior to picture taking. Don't judge.)

38 pushups...nonstop.

38 chair-assist pull-ups...completed in 3 sets.

3.8 pancakes. Yes, I was chewing. And that is a Lainie monster.

Blogging. And pinning.

Home Improvement project.

One of the 38 trips up and down the steps.

I only ate 3.8 of them, but I baked 38.

Couldn't do the leaves, but here are the pumpkins. And the orange counter top :)

We took more pictures, but...these are the ones that made it here...didn't want to completely overwhelm you with silliness.

Like that doesn't happen here on a regular basis anyway.

;)

Best. Birthday. Ever.

Birthday Challenge: Complete

2011-10-13T00:59:00.001-04:00

Do you have any idea how many servings of pretzel M&M's one consumes when she eats 38 of them??

That would be 2.5 servings, folks. A whopping 425 calories. That's right. Four HUNDRED twenty-five calories.

How about 3.8 nestles tollhouse cookies?? Roughly 380.

To say that I'm not counting my calories today would be...reasonable, I hope. In fairness, on this fine Wednesday, I did happen to burn something ridiculous like 2679 calories (thank you bodybugg). I will pretend that all of the calories I consumed in vastly inappropriate ways don't really matter on my birthday. ;)

Today has been the very best birthday of my entire life. In previous years, I have gone to bed so disappointed...because I depended upon everyone around me to make the day incredible for me. When this just didn't really cross their minds, I felt neglected. I go out of my way on my kids' birthdays to make them incredible. My goal? Spoil that child complete rotten. When no one thought to do that for me...it was kind of a crushing blow. I am at a very different place this year. I decided that I would make today awesome. And that's exactly what it was.

Awesome. Awesomest, even. Oh my gosh, we had so much fun. *I* had so much fun. :)

I had a couple of fails along the way with my crazy list of birthday challenge goals. For example...I didn't go to bed until a bit after my scheduled 12:32 this morning...Philip called after getting off work late, and since I was still awake, I gladly talked to him until my eyes just couldn't stay open any longer. That happened long about...oh...12:50. Then...my alarm didn't go off at 4:20 as I had planned. I awoke with a start at 5:31. So...I adjusted a bit. Counted the extra sleep (minus the time I didn't sleep before 12:50) as my first nap of the day. And there, my third fail comes in...I only got 2 naps, counting that first one. BUT...I spent it snuggled into Philip while my kids read and played. :) WIN. For the record, I suck at napping, especially when I fill the days as full as I filled today. Also on the fail side...collecting 38 colored leaves while on a walk...it poured rain for a large part of the day. I substituted--38 different foods from the chinese buffet at lunch!! And I realized I don't have a mini-leaf cutter for my gumpaste leaves...so 38 leaves did not get cut...but 7 adorable orange pumpkins did. We adapt!! The only tasks not completed prior to midnight on 10/13: blogging for 38 minutes (here I am!!) and the 8 oz. of merlot (currently beside the computer...I'm sipping. slowly.). It. Will. All. Get. Done.

I think I overbooked myself just a tiny little bit.

As for the rest of the list...it got done. With a few variations. I realized after the kids went to bed that I had not intentionally said 38 encouraging things to my children throughout the day...so I made a list. I was amazed at how quickly I could come up with 38 things I adore about my children. I shouldn't have been amazed, really. Because I ran so much throughout the day (cramming in lunch at En En Chinese buffet, two hours out in the middle of the day for Reasa's horse lesson, dinner with my parents' at Bob Evans, taking the girls to youth group, a stop at Rite Aid (to get pretzel m&m's), and then the Salvation Army, then an hour and a little more at my parents' before picking up the girls...), I really didn't have the opportunity to eat as I would normally eat...so I really had to cram things in at the end of the day. I was still so full from lunch at dinner time that the thought of m&m's, shakeology, and the water I still needed to drink overwhelmed me just a bit. I still got all 3.8 teaspoons of peanut butter in my shakeology...but it probably amounted to about 1/4 of a serving of shakeology when all was said and done...it was totally awesomely yummy. I am stuffed. I had such a blast crossing each item off this list...and the things on the list...I mean, what a great way to spend a day!! I absolutely feel like I got hit by a truck...but...I had so much fun. We laughed so hard. We did hilarious things. We painted and giggled and mocked the horrible music that hit #1 on the charts every week of my birthday since 1973 (oh my gosh, the 70's sucked!!). The kids encouraged me throughout the day, and demanded kisses to fill my quota. My favorite moment?? When my alarm went off at 8:38, and the kids ran to me and EACH kissed me 38 times. I loved that. My next favorite moment happened when I hit 2.8 miles on the treadmill after not running more than 2 miles in months...and realized I would not be stopping for the rest of the run. I took a 45-second break at the end of the first mile, and at 3 minutes left, bumped my speed to 7 miles an hour. I realize this is no big deal, but I PLANNED to take breaks at the end of every 10-minute mile, knowing that I hadn't run and that I was significantly out of shape for running.

Have I mentioned how much I love Insanity?

Today, my house suffered. It's wrecked.

I don't even care.

I feel strong. I feel like I seriously, seriously kicked butt all day long. I threw in things that I didn't even plan to do. I wrote to our compassion child today. I cleaned a bathroom, and did a load of laundry. The kitchen is actually clean tonight before I go to bed (I told myself that stuff didn't matter today). I bought supplies for a couple of Christmas gifts I brainstormed throughout the day. ;) I had a really great conversation with my kid about something important. I realize that this day was completely selfish and totally self-focused...and that that could be an incredibly negative thing if it happened every day...but it won't. My first email this morning was a birthday wish from a dear friend. 168 friends wished me a happy birthday on my facebook wall, and another 10 in messages...and another 8 in text messages, then 2 birthday cards in the mail. Silly? Maybe. But wow. Tomorrow I will upload silly pictures that we took throughout the day...and I will remember how good today felt. And I will live off this high all day tomorrow...and for a long time after that.

I will also sleep until I have to wake up so that I'm ready for the baby tomorrow. I think I get a rest day after all this nonsense. I don't think Shaun T will mind. :)

My oldest is with my mom tonight, awaiting the arrival of my mom's Westie's puppies (she begged to be present for the births), my middle might be sucking her thumb (until I go up to kiss her one last time before I sleep) and probably dreaming about the next scene she will film for her mini-series, and my littlest...is hopefully sleeping...he struggled a bit with sleeplessness at bedtime tonight. And I will crawl into bed tonight so grateful for my 38th birthday. Grateful for every single moment of it. Grateful for the kids who helped me with 8/10 of a home improvement project. Grateful that Philip sacrificed sleep to spend the morning with us and take us out to lunch. Grateful for parents who love me so much that they let my kids blow paper at them all through dinner (then paid for it!). Grateful that this year...I got to make today something that I will never, ever forget.

I loved today. I am so very blessed.

Want a great place to pray for the 38 people who are most important to you? Try your treadmill. The downside? You might wind up in tears. It makes running kind of interesting. ;)

Birthday Challenge

2011-10-11T21:07:00.000-04:00

So...tomorrow is my 38th birthday.

38.

I'm determined to live beyond that stupid number. I think after hitting 35, I have realized how quickly mid-life approaches, if I haven't already hit it. I recently read a Steve Edwards article in which he talked about how he chooses to approach birthdays...challenging his body to do extreme things...things no (fill in the blank)-year-old would normally attempt. I may not scale mountains or ride crazy distances on the saddle of a bike (and as much as I'd like to ride 38 km tomorrow, I know I won't have time...it almost made the list, but I still have to fit in things like "go to the library" and "take Reasa to a horse lesson")...but there are things I will do. I won't take 38 days to do it--that's a "maybe next year" kind of goal...I want to do it all in the 24 hours of my actual birthday...so, here's what tomorrow is going to look like, not necessarily in this order:

1) wake up at 4:20 (that would be 3 hours, 80 minutes into the actual day)
2) 38 minutes of yoga
3) 38 push-ups without stopping
4) 38 pull-ups (it's going to take a couple of sets to do that one, with chair assist)
5) 380 crunches
6) 3.8 mile run in 38 minutes or less
7) 38 oz. water in am and pm
8) 3.8 cups of espresso/coffee
9) 3.8 home improvement projects completed (may include cleaning off 3.8 shelving units in the basement. not sure)
10) $38 to charity
11) 38 trips up and down the steps
12) 38 kisses to each child
13) eat 38 pretzel m&m's
14) bake 38 cookies
15) eat 3.8 blueberry pancakes for breakfast
16) 38 minutes reading for pleasure
17) 38 minutes blogging
18) 3.8 38-minute naps (i'm getting up at 4:20. this shouldn't be hard. :) )
19) 38 minutes read-aloud to kids
20) make 38 gumpaste leaves (ok, so I have a cake to work on for this weekend)
21) read 38 verses each from the old testament, new testament and psalms
22) listen to all of the songs that were number 1 the week of my birthday since 1973 (that's a heck of a lot of Mariah Carey. sheesh.)
23) pray specifically for 38 people
24) pin 38 items on pinterest
25) 38 kisses from my kids at 8:38 am (that's when i was born!)
26) eat 3.8 of the aforementioned cookies. maybe with candles in them. and i might just cut 1/5 of one of those candles off, for good measure (holy carb day)
27) take 38 pictures of things i want to remember (possibly including elements from the challenge). and upload them immediately. and start a birthday challenge album (over which i will not obsess--they may go into pocket albums, folks)
28) practice katas 38 times (so...each of the ones i know about 8 times)
29) 38 seconds in crane, 3.8 times (so the last time will be 30.4 seconds. :) )
30) drink my afternoon shakeology with 3.8 teaspoons of peanut butter. :)
31) brainstorm 38 Christmas gifts for my kids and family.
32) say 38 encouraging things to my children throughout the day
33) donate 38 items to the Salvation Army
34) cull 38 books from the boxes in my basement (this should be a piece of cake)
35) 38 Philip kisses (if he can be here at some point. we'll see. if he can't, this will be to text him 38 times during the day tomorrow while he works)
36) take a walk with the kids, collecting 38 colored leaves along the route
37) 3.8 hours of sleep the night before all this craziness...bed by 12:32 am, 10/12/11 (that's kind of a cool date, actually)(i should function ok with the naps right?)
38) 3 shots of bourbon and 8 oz. of Wagner Merlot (not all at once people. don't all fall over.)

For the record, there will be no Kingpin Apple Fritters included in this challenge. Primarily because I don't live in the San Francisco Bay Area, CA, and also because...frankly, I can't imagine trying to eat 3.8 of anybody's apple fritters. I enjoy a good apple fritter (hello, Wegmans), but...holy heck...3.8 of them??? I think I might have a heart attack right there on the spot. I will, however, vow to look more closely at the option next year, when I start my Birthday Challenge as it is meant to be done--over the full number of days before the date...so 39 days before the challenge.

Oh my good Lord, next year I'm going to be 39.

And let's just not even talk about 2013.

Mine.

2011-10-08T23:29:00.001-04:00

Today I painted on my wall. Words, actually. I painted words on my wall. I did not plan to paint words on my wall when I woke up this morning. Actually, I did not plan to paint words on my wall two hours before I did it. But. I painted words on my wall. Words that mean something to me, for my family. I did not plan well. I didn't carefully determine exactly how I would do it. I didn't even make sure the whole thing was perfectly straight. I picked out a paint brush (two, actually), chose paint, and stuck some tape haphazardly in mostly straight lines. And I wrote. This is what I wrote, completely plagiarized from someone's pinterest post:

In this house...
we do REAL
we do mistakes
we do I'm sorry
we do second chances
we do FUN
we do hugs
we do forgiveness
we do really LOUD
WE DO FAMILY
we do LOVE.

It's not straight. It's not precise. It bucks against my absolute perfectionism. And I totally and completely love it. Because it says what I believe. What I have always believed but have never had the courage to write on my walls. But there it is. The first thing you see when you walk in my front door. Because, you see...these walls? They're mine. This family? It's mine. And that wall? It is how I choose for us to live.

Period.

Simple Woman's Daybook, 9/19/11

2011-09-19T08:15:00.003-04:00

Outside my window...it's freezing! time to take the air conditioner out of the window and think about where i put all of my long sleeved things...

I am thinking...that today will be our Sabbath. perfect timing with sick kids and a momma who refuses to get sick.

I am thankful for...my amazing parents...and forty years.

I am wearing...green hoodie, skinny jeans, cuffed, white tank.

I am remembering...that today is a gift. even if it's a monday.

I am hearing...the dishwasher run...because i forgot to turn it on before bed last night.

I am creating...order and peace in my house early today.

I am going...to do a 3-day shakeology cleanse, starting this morning. i already feel good just knowing i'm doing it.

I am reading...recipes. and cookbooks.

I am hoping...that she doesn't push every one of my buttons today.

On my mind...due dates.

From the learning rooms...zoology, capitalization, explorers, King James, printing practice, times tables (oh, do we need the review).

Noticing that...if my feet are cold, so is the rest of me. this is an every-fall-type of lesson.

From the kitchen...all things apple. we brought home 38 pounds yesterday. and tea....my fall drink.

Around the house...leftover chaos from a weekend of relaxing and partying at my parents' house. does your house get trashed even when you go somewhere else?? also...the whistling radiators. hate the thought of paying the gas company...love how they warm up the place.

One of my favorite things...jeans weather.

Praying for...contentment.

A verse for you...Ephesians 4:29 Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. (yes, i kept the same verse from last week. it is a good reminder for me.)

A few plans for this week...75 gumpaste ladybugs. 200 cupcakes. and a Ming Ming. karate soon?

If you enjoy dwelling on the simple things in life and want to participate in this, CLICK HERE to read all about it and join us! Leave me a comment so I know to check out your blog to see your post!

Simple Woman's Daybook, 9/14/11

2011-09-14T22:38:00.002-04:00

Outside my window...clouds and the threat of rain...and cooler temps. it's fall!

I am thinking...about how quickly time passes. how short life is.

I am thankful for...being dearly loved.

I am wearing...white hoodie, black flannel jammie pants with snowflakes.

I am remembering...my fourth graders at CLC.

I am hearing...Hillsong Live "Our God is Love." over and over and over.

I am creating...oh, guess. yep. a cake plan for the next 3 days.

I am going...to conquer my entire to-do list tomorrow.

I am reading...the texts for my online wedding planner course. slowly. because that's how i have time for it right now.

I am hoping...that Grandpa is ok.

On my mind...the possible contents of the next text message.

From the learning rooms...Life Science, exploration of the new world, the book of James, dividing decimals, area, the art of the reformation, punctuation and writing.

Noticing that...i love.

From the kitchen...homemeade oreos and lots of meals that actually follow the meal plan.

Around the house...my office needs to be hoed out and organized. i keep putting it off. it keeps hanging over my head.

One of my favorite things...my kids. ok, that's 3. but still.

Praying for...healing.

A verse for you...Ephesians 4:29 Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.

A few plans for this week...lots of phone calls to follow up. four cakes. celebrating my parents' 40th anniversary with apple picking and a few introductions.

If you enjoy dwelling on the simple things in life and want to participate in this, CLICK HERE to read all about it and join us! Leave me a comment so I know to check out your blog to see your post!

I'm still surprised.

2011-09-12T22:25:00.001-04:00

I don't know why, really, but I'm always surprised when something pops up that I actually sort of expected to happen along the way. The latest surprise smacked me in the face this morning when I decompressed with my kids from their weekend away.

We talked things through in such a civilized manner when I actually made the decision to leave. I packed my things. We had conversations about who would take/keep what, when the kids would visit, how we would do Christmas, who we would explain things to, how we would go about that process, who would pay the bills, what child support would look like. We didn't fight tooth and nail, we didn't involve lawyers and judges. We agreed. We wrote it down. We turned it over for legaleze drafting. We read it, fixed details, signed it, returned it.

It's been 11 months. Things change. I shouldn't be surprised.

But I still am.

The things that started out so civil don't stay that way over time. I don't know if feelings get hurt or realities set in or bitterness kicks back in over time or distance or realization or what actually happens...but civility slips away. Maybe it's just nature. Maybe when you stop thinking about it all the time you get lazy about what you said you would do. Maybe you just forget. I don't know.

My heart breaks for my kids, though. And I am reminded of how carefully I must use my words. They are worth a constant, vigilant, humble effort. I will put in that effort. I will not forget.

working it out

2011-09-07T19:44:00.000-04:00

I haven't been posting about my workouts/health/nutrition lately. There might be a reason. There's usually a reason I don't post about things. Most of the time it has to do with discouragement or crisis or frustration or something of that sort.

Yeah. I'm there.

I'm loving my workouts, really. I have to say that. I went here--On The Fly Fitness--and found this fantastic hybrid schedule for ChaLEAN Extreme and TurboFire and have been (nearly) 100% consistent with it over the past nine weeks. Nine Weeks. Wow. That's a long time. It's a 12-week program. If you don't know these programs, Chalene Johnson leads each one, and her style is fast, great music, super challenging--lots of martial arts and moving quick. ChaLEAN Extreme incorporates lifting heavy weights--yes, even for women--and lifting slow. She challenges you to get lean and to go heavy or go home. Sound crazy? It's not. Talk to me about it. I promise, I'm not turning into a muscle head. Instead of using the cardio segments from CLX, however, I have incorporated the crazy cardio from TurboFire, Chalene's high intensity choreographed "kickboxing" program. Some days I'm working through a shorter HIIT (high intensity interval training) workout from TF, then doing one of the resistance workouts from CLX. The day between resistance workouts, I use a longer TF workout and sometimes throw in a double on the resistance days. Not very often though. And I have to be honest...on heavy cake weeks, or weeks that I coordinate a wedding, the schedule has to be a little more flexible. Let's throw in there the fact that I've spent until 1:00 in the morning on the phone many nights over the past month or so and...well, I can say that doubles have been nearly nonexistent in that time. And that workouts have probably not been up to my normal standards.

And see...here enters my frustration/discouragement. Because if I don't have time to do the workouts like I want to do them...guess what my nutrition looks like?

Lazy. That's what. So, I'm less than thrilled with my current weight, dissatisfied with my tummy, and irritated with myself. It's like this vicious cycle. Rollercoasterish. But the thing is...I still feel pretty darn good.

That's the reality of being fit: even when you're a little discouraged, you still feel pretty darn good.

Three years ago, I lost 20 pounds (i know i've told you this story, but sometimes it bears repeating). I did it in a horribly unhealthy way--chopped out all carbs, basically, and dropped my consumption down to about 1000 calories a day. It still took me about 8 months to lose all of that, and with the craziness of moving and mild depression and eating virtually every meal out of the house, it makes sense as to why that happened. But I didn't work out basically at all in that process. It took me about six months to gain 8 pounds of that back...and I felt like garbage. Honestly, I felt like garbage the whole time I was losing and after I had lost. There was nothing healthy about eating almost nothing. I still couldn't run from the store to my car in a rainstorm without being seriously out of breath. Feeling that way as compared to how I feel right now...sucks. I love running from Friendly's to my car in tonight's rain and not feeling like I want to die when I collapse into the seat. Not huffing and puffing for the next 5 minutes as I try to catch my breath. Parking as far away from the door as possible in the rain storm so that someone with 3 toddlers can have that spot next to the door and knowing that I CAN run (and that the same run is good for my kids, who like getting wet anyway) without dying. I love feeling the muscles in my legs when I walk. Seeing them in my arms when I reach for things. And then there's waking up in the morning ready to get up, even if I didn't get as much sleep as I'm used to. Sleeping all night without waking up to stare at the ceiling. Falling immediately to sleep when I crawl into bed. Keeping up with my kids when they're running around the park. Keeping up with my dad and brother on my first ever long bike ride (yeah, I know they took it easy on me my first 15 miles, but whatever).

So I guess my point in all of this...yep, I'm irritated with myself. Yep, I'm discouraged with what should be a much better in-shape-ness than the place where I currently find myself. But...when the rubber meets the road, I still feel pretty good. The temptation would be to let myself just stay right here, unfortunately. The temptation, frankly, that has propelled me through the summer at this very. same. spot.

So, here's my action plan: I'm going to finish up the last 3 weeks of this hybrid with gusto. I'm going to kick it up with 3 doubles workouts a week (starting tonight with a two-mile treadmill run, as it's way too wet to go outside...holy it's-been-raining-for-two-solid-days, batman). Tomorrow I go back to Phase I P90X portion nutrition plan...complete with checklist in my to-do list and all. My goal is to drop these stubborn 3 or 4 pounds that always bother me, and maybe drop a couple more in those 3.5 or so weeks as well.

If I tell you, and know that you could ask me about it at any point, I have to do it, right?

And have I told you all about my bodybugg yet?

The Wedding

2011-09-03T20:50:00.000-04:00

So this weekend, there's this wedding. I'm coordinating it.

It is making me laugh. And cry. And scream a little bit.

It's funny how when you watch a wedding from the pews and think about how beautiful everything is and how wonderful the celebration is and how beautiful everyone looks and how wonderful the bride and her family did with preparations...you forget what exactly goes into the process of making it all of those things.

It's funny how when you have 18 days to help a bride bring all of the last-minute details together you seriously wonder...

...is anyone going to say any of those things about this wedding?

I am thankful the reception is at a winery, and someone else is bringing the cake (which was delivered today instead of tomorrow because I had nothing to do with the planning/confirmation process).

Also, I will never make all of the pies for the rehearsal dinner at a wedding I plan to coordinate again.

So, it's been...like...months

2011-09-01T10:57:00.002-04:00

I know. I really do. But, you see, life just keeps barreling on. Things keep happening. Things that keep me away from my blog for mostly good reasons.

Things like a week spent camping in a tent with my kids. During which I spent 23 hours at home, baking, decorating, and repairing crashed cakes. Yep. My first official, very serious caketastrophe. (And yes, it rained that week. A lot.)

Things like a week where I built and delivered 7 cakes.

Things like a weekend where I built and delivered 4 cakes.

Things like...

...hmm. There's a lot of stuff having to do with cakes up there, isn't there?

Oh, there have been other things going on too, I promise. It's not all cake-related. Though sometimes it feels like it all revolves around the cakes I'm designing/planning/baking/building/delivering at the time. Funny how work is like that. Especially when you do it out of your actual kitchen.

There have been four weeks in a row on worship team. Meeting new people. Talking a lot. Researching and ordering new curriculum. Starting Rosetta Stone Spanish. Figuring out finances and debt and a plan to deal with all of that. Raising three kids. Helping my dad tear the roof off the back of my house. Coordinating a wedding.

And last night I went and did something that will surely keep me from blogging even more...I know...you're shocked, right? Last night I enrolled in a Wedding Planner Certification Course.

Why would I do such a thing?

'Cause I felt like it, that's why.

I've been the "Wedding Coordinator" at my church for several years. Pioneered the position, if you will. Helped nail down the process. Put a job description together. Made an in-depth questionnaire for potential brides. I've helped out with 3 different receptions at varying levels. I've been the Maid of Honor in several friends' weddings, so I've helped work through the process with many brides...and every single time I do a wedding...I think about how much I enjoy that process. I am reminded of how good it feels to help that bride through the most important day of her life to that point. I always wish I had more time to devote, more organization to offer, more resources to give her. I love caking. I do. I think I am good at it, and I think that I am more and more in demand each time I open my email or look at my facebook. But. I don't think I can make a living making cakes out of my kitchen. Oh, it's a nice extra-income-type-thing...but it's not a substantial, someday-I'll-be-able-to-retire income. More of a let's-use-this-as-vacation-money income. A creative outlet. And it's seriously labor intensive. It's an artform, really. The effort to build those cakes doesn't really pay off.

So, there it is. I will become a wedding planner. :) And that may seem like it's coming out of nowhere...but it's not. I keep thinking...nutrition. Health. Science. Math. And I keep winding up back at...doing something with people. Doing something I love. I love weddings. I love working on my own time frame. This could give me the opportunity to continue to stay home with my kids and work and make a decent living (and a few cakes on the side. ;) ). I might even be able to retire some day. And I might need a couple of business classes along the way. And...some referrals. I'm so excited about the coursework, and not that it's really super necessary, I'm sure, but I'm already 2/15 of the way through it...they give you 12 months to finish it all...hehe...and I look forward to learning how to promote and market myself. I may enlist my brother. He may make me move to Rochester. ;)

Favorites

2011-07-17T21:03:00.000-04:00

...nerf wars occurring in my living room.

...the little brother lovingly educating the big sister on the best way to fire over the couch cushions.

...giggling.

...knowing they're all safely and snugly in their beds where they should be.

...river baptisms. watching my girl's crush get baptized. hehe.

...too much ice cream in a week. too many brownies in a day. too many fingers full of buttercream per cake.

...customers who post glowing facebook status updates regarding the cake you delivered ten minutes ago.

...anticipation of greatness.

..."mommy, i don't care what anybody says. i want to be the teen who isn't afraid to hold her mom's hand."

...fighting tears so that she's not embarrassed she's holding her mom's hand.

...marshmallow white cake body spray.

...a fine layer of cornstarch everywhere.

...knowing the baby will be here in the morning. and she'll want to snuggle before breakfast.

...knowing it's a short week with the baby ;)

...only having one cake next weekend. and it's for a baby i've only gotten to see once. ;)

...a dog who would rather be next to me than anywhere else.

...my mom.

...fake English accents and silly catch phrases.

...Phineas and Ferb. and iCarly.

...Phineas and Ferb and iCarly while laughing with my kids.

...hand-me-down grills.

...answered prayer.

...dreaming. wishful thinking. constant prayer.

...rest. summer.

...unconditional love.

Simple Woman's Daybook, 7/11/11

2011-07-11T16:30:00.000-04:00

Outside my window...it's HOT. but it's sunny. and not snowing. works for me.

I am thinking...that standing here in front of my computer is a respite from the reality that my girls...are grown-up enough for teen camp. right. now.

I am thankful for...air conditioning. my son's best friend.

I am wearing...grey tank, plaid button-down short, denim shorts

I am remembering...my first day of teen camp, Chambers, 1984.

I am creating...the keep-Bryson-busy-while-his-sisters-are-away-without-going-completely-crazy-or-spending-a-small-fortune schedule for this week.

I am going...to be one tired mama by Friday. ;)

I am reading...Breaking Free by Beth Moore.

I am hoping...for the best week for my girls. that they grow. love. learn. stretch.

On my mind... so very much.

From the learning rooms... learning rooms? what learning rooms??

Noticing that...when my kids are gone, my house is ridiculously clean. and i like it cluttery better.

From the kitchen...mint chocolate chip ice cream mixing in the ice cream maker we got for a screaming deal at Walmart yesterday...

Around the house...everything left over from packing the girls for camp. holy nightmarish process.

One of my favorite things... thunderstorms.

Praying for...focus. the ability to "praise him in this storm."

A picture thought...

The girls and their girls... ;)
A few plans for this week... Nerf camp. Drive-In movies. Campfires. Swimming Lessons. Sleepovers. Missing my girlybugs. Lots and lots of that one.

If you enjoy dwelling on the simple things in life and want to participate in this, CLICK HERE to read all about it and join us! Leave me a comment so I know to check out your blog to see your post!

Nick

2011-07-02T12:27:00.000-04:00

I got a call this morning from my Momma...I almost always love calls from my Momma...it's just the nature of who she is and who we are. This morning's call...I could have lived without.

When we moved away from Rochester 13 years ago, I gladly came "home." Though I had never lived in the town, if you had asked me where I wanted to raise my kids, I would answer Corning. Just a few miles from where I lived until I was 11, it felt like home. Add to that the fact that Mom and Dad already lived here, and that the church where Dad was hired treated us like family as soon as we arrived...there was very little missing of Rochester that went on, despite living there for 11 years. The thing is...there were people I did miss. People with whom I did not keep in touch. I have few regrets in life. This choice, I regret.

Some of the most influential people in my life stayed in Rochester when I left. People who guided me through my teen years and loved me despite my boy-crazy, giggly, dramatic times. Richard and Gail Means, for example. Listeners. Compassion-givers. Huggers. Sally Lawrence. My mentor. Discipleship partner. The one I confided in when mom and dad just didn't get it...funny how they knew to put her in my life. Nick and Marsha Borys.

Nick and Marsha Borys.

You had to know them to understand my heart for them. Their oldest daughter was one of my best friends all through high school (and two of the other sisters were sweet friends as well). I spent days and days and days at their house in Greece. I permed the girls' hair, straightened it again, danced and giggled to Sweatin' with the Oldies at youth group sleepovers, developed an aversion to shrimp after helping devour something like 20 pounds of it in one sitting at a summer party, whooped it up at cookouts, trick-or-treated (talk about a haul!!) through their neighborhood, listened to Nick's perspective on life and living while he sat in the kitchen and flipped pancakes on the griddle (I think that's an accurate memory)(funny what stays in your mind and what doesn't), giggled with Marsha over boys and Believers and songs and choreography, slept and didn't sleep and helped everyone clean up so I could sleep over. When I got married, Marsha's parents gave us a week at their beautiful home (complete with indoor pool and anything else you could want) in Hilton Head, SC. For Free. Honestly, I think more of my memories from my teen years took place at the Borys house than they did at my own. Or anywhere else, for that matter. I remember more of the Borys' house than I do of school.

Which is why, 20 years later, the thought of losing Nick, even after not being with him, makes me ache.

Nick has battled Leukemia for years, apparently, and about a month ago, the medication he takes for Leukemia caused his body to not fight an infection. He became dehydrated and his blood pressure bottomed out, and they couldn't get it back under complete control. His kidneys began to shut down. They started dialysis. Nothing has really helped. He has been in varying stages of not-doing-well since that point. My parents rushed to Rochester when he was admitted and have kept in touch. This morning, he is on a ventilator, awaiting the arrival of Renee, his daughter, who lives in NYC and will arrive at around 11 to say her goodbyes.

His health has always been touch and go. After a debilitating accident 35 years ago which left his leg virtually destroyed and infection after infection, he spent months in the hospital, years battling his health. I remember wondering how one man could go through so much. But he did. And he lived life with gusto. You never wondered where you stood with Nick--his joy and his frustration showed all over his face. All through his tone. He didn't pull any punches. His laugh echoes in my mind...you have never heard a laugh like his. He was gruff and rough, and he cried without reservation...over his children's accomplishments, his successes or failures, his happiness or his pain. The thought of never hearing that again...after not reconnecting in years...is devastating. My heart aches for Marsha and the kids and the people who will lose him. And though I know with whom he will walk today...I know those who will walk without him. And I will grieve with them.