Flavours of Style

Bar Dolci

2011-05-29T10:44:00.001+08:00

I am never good with titles, but this one's an exception. I could think of several titles for this blog post. Try me - a. Parisian Life b. Feeling French Girls c. The Hunt for Macarons in Metro Manila d. One Fateful Afternoon e. Getting our Sweets Fix f. After the Unexpected Last Day at Work. I can actually go on and on and on.

A lot of things happened that day, but they're just all too nonsense to remember. So, I'm settling for a somewhat review, although I don't think I have all the device to make one up.

I googled 'macarons in Manila' or something like that, and I got this in the end.

Been seeing lots of these from random Tumblr sites. I even thought they were the same as macaroons. They look so pleasing in the eyes, so I was thrilled to know that I could actually find them in Manila as well.

So true...and being bitter is so beneath us.

Having read a couple of reviews of Bar Dolci, we excitedly added it to our Bucket List. One afternoon after work, we were too stressed out, angered and annoyed (read: office politics), and what better way to cope up with those ugly feelings but to eat good food and loiter at some dreamy (but not necessarily expensive) place.

In between all the frustrations, on my mind is a little voice giddily screaming, "Finally, some macarons!".

Assorted flavors for everyone!

Because of mixed excitement and irritation, we ordered a little more than what we could finish. I couldn't even remember the flavors that I had. I didn't like them as much as I thought I would. I should have probably ordered just a few to take the most pleasure from and get lost in them. I got too overwhelmed that I ate one after another, and I didn't really have any time to just absorb the goodness of it. I would probably choose some flavored silvanas any day. Still, I'm giving them another try, and maybe I'll have a change of heart.

Nonetheless, the place does not disappoint. It's a perfect spot to hangout with the girlfriends what with the pretty view from the second floor and the modern but cozy interiors. It suits my taste definitely. I also like that it's in the quiet and rather deserted part of the Metro.

One of these days, I am going back not only for the macarons; I might just as well give their gelatos and non-fat popsicles (sounds interesting, huh) a try.

Deffo one of my favorite photographs of us three. We were just in time for sunset. I miss them to bits.

February

2011-05-29T00:44:00.000+08:00

I was not completely loveless last Valentine's. I received a lot of love from my favorite people, my favorite friends especially. And I gave a lot of it to them, too.

Also, I started the year doing new things, doing things for the first time. Last January, I had my very first marathon, a 10K trail run at that, no kidding. Come February, I made sure I'd not miss the Hot Air Balloon Fiesta with my bestest friends.

Three's Not a Crowd

2011-05-28T23:47:00.000+08:00

1. Sugarfree's last gig at Eastwood 2. Videoke night at Centerstage as a post V-day celebration 3. Goofing around in a peaceful and quiet coffee shop 4. Makati to Tagaytay dinner 5. First time I brought them home and first weekend together 6. Banapple after work 7. Mercato after the NatGeo run 8. Zaifu dinner after a movie date 9. First ever photo together at Ayala Triangle Gardens

I welcomed 2011 not only with a harsh break-up but also a new job. I was the new girl in the office, and when you're the new girl, you'd most likely feel unintentionally out-of-place and left out, like you're some outsider looking in. While I have learned to enjoy the company of myself alone, I didn't plan to be a loner. Luckily though, the two girls who had known each other for quite some time before I broke in, never made me feel like I was interrupting a bond. They never made me feel like I was always barging in their conversations or whatsoever. In short, I didn't go through all the troubles of fitting in. Think Cady Heron of Mean Girls, who compromised her beliefs and virtues to force an entry into a circle. Nothing dramatic like that ever happened. First, no compromise was made because we hit it off (or more likely, I hit it off with them) in an instant. Turns out we had a lot of things in common. We read (more or like) the same books, watch the same TV shows and movies, and like the same (fictional) boys. And after a little over three months, we have influenced one another in more than a couple of ways.

It's sad that our career in the company didn't turn out particularly fine. Okay, no sugarcoating here. It was bad. It was traumatic. Still, we're looking at the silver lining here, which apparently, is the exceptional friendship that was formed. Who knows, maybe we'll work together again soon. But for now, we'll just focus on making sure that we never forget one another. Once we're well-adjusted with our new jobs, we should promise to have regular dates. Besides, we still got tons of items in our bucket list (Proof that I never had a hard time blending in with these girls: On the second week, I already saw myself making a bucket list with them).

I love you, girls! I said a bang bang bangity bang...

Photoshoot by the Ruins

2011-05-27T21:45:00.001+08:00

Since I had been MIA for several months during the onset of this year, I am posting rather aged photos and stories.

Early this year, I went through a break-up. Break-ups, regardless of who broke up with who, are never easy. Somehow though, they become endurable with the presence of and support from good friends who never unnecessarily judge or ask, friends who never give unsolicited advice, friends who give you a laugh to conceal a broken heart.

And friends who'll come running when you need some company when you feel like doing some act of self-destruction. Ha! In this case, trying out the zipline, finally. So yes, I was just kidding. No serious self-destructive behaviors happened here. A stick or two, maybe. Oops. Tsk.

When the Shoppaholic and the Bookworm Live in One Body

2011-05-15T20:03:00.000+08:00

Apologies for the grainy photos. My SLR was 'diagnosed', but I'm happy to announce that it's back in shape now.

Now this is gonna be my next beach read. Remind me.

Oh look, an outfit post: thrifted knit gray top, Cotton On skirt, Janylin nude pumps, Charles & Keith black bag

You know when people fear that there are gonna be shortages in goods because they're experiencing or anticipating the occurrence of natural disasters so they go on panic-buying? I do have the same tendencies too. In my case though, it's specifically panic-book-buying.

If I were asked to describe myself in 5 words or less (not necessarily 5 adjectives), it'd have to be the girl who is never without a book. One of the reasons why I am never a fan of tiny bags is because I couldn't always fit a book in them. I always carry a book with me wherever I go. Overtime, I've become the opposite of a fun person, and I've started to unlearn the art of doing nothing. To make sure that I have always something to occupy myself with when the need arrives, such as times when I need to wait for the van to be filled out with passengers before running, I never leave home without a book.

I have an extended pile of unread books at home. Still, I can't stop myself from buying. When I am out, waiting for someone for instance, and I'm reading a book, which I am about to finish, my mind gets a bit alarmed knowing that I am only a few pages away until I reveal the ending to myself (Oh God, I just wrote a very crappy and unpolished sentence). I am quite flustered, thinking, "What would I do when I finish reading this book, and my friend's still stuck in traffic and won't be here in half an hour?" I know I'm stressing myself out, but that's just how I am. It's just probably the shoppaholic in me that's egging my mind on to unnecessarily take out some bills from my wallet. Ah, you evil side!

So maybe, instead of being known to be the girl who is never without a book, from now on, I should be described as someone who is never without a book - or two.

Birthday Packages

2011-05-10T22:34:00.000+08:00

I have been disengaged from several birthday traditions while growing up.

One of them is sporting shiny, new pieces - from head to toe - on the day itself. It doesn't quite make a lot of sense now, since I pretty much buy and wear brand new things on a regular basis. Dressing up on special occasions has become unnecessary. In fact, this year, I decided to recycle an outfit, just because.

Second is asking and actually expecting birthday presents. When I was a kid, birthdays usually meant spanking toys and school and crafty supplies from parents and relatives. But then, I started growing up and these people missed out on a lot. They lost track of my interests and likes that they'd end up wrapping photo albums and picture frames in fancy wrappers just so they wouldn't come empty-handed before devouring my mom's cooking. There's nothing wrong with that, but really, they should've not bothered. Besides, I am not very big on receiving (I guess my parents did a very good job teaching us that 'it is better to give than to receive').

Luckily though, this year, my relatives have realized that the era of photos on paper had passed already. Some arrived with birthday hugs and kisses (which are more than enough) while others opted to gift me with GCs (which are more practical). However, the closest in my family and loved ones didn't need to go through the act of giving just for the heck of it. They knew exactly what I'd like (regardless of the budget they allotted hehe). Here are a few of the most favorite things I got this year (in no particular order):

F21 goodies! A printed maxi dress and turquoise necklace that is sure to spice up a simple outfit

Essential pairs: Brown pumps and black flats

More florals for the summer: a blue zippered dress and a pink romper

Fully Booked discount card!!!

A book with a dedication. Who still does that?

People have been telling me that I'm the kind of person who's difficult to find a gift for. They just probably don't know me well enough. I'm just a simple girl who wants simple and pretty and witty tiny teeny things in life.

Birthday Cake Goodness

2011-05-10T21:48:00.001+08:00

I think my dentist accidentally pulled out my sweet tooth. I am unusually not fond of sweets. Not that I hate them. I just rarely crave for them. However, birthday cakes are exceptions.

The famous Contis' Mango Brava

Chocolate roll from Red Ribbon

...especially when they're spiced up with pretty little birthday candles!

Nanay

2011-05-08T12:02:00.000+08:00

Isn't she beautiful? I posted this photo on my Facebook wall, and a friend commented that she looks like Charo Santos. Haha!

We may not have the best mother-daughter relationship, still, you are the best mother I could ever have. Thank you for your undying patience, understanding and forgiveness. Now that I'm all grown-up, I promise to be a better daughter to you; you won't have to cover up for me to Tatay anymore. At least not as often as you used to. Ha!

Happy Mother's Day to you, Mom dearest and to all the moms out there! <3

Guess Who's Making a Comeback

2011-05-08T00:15:00.000+08:00

Under the First Rain of May (at least while I was conscious). I should've let my hair get soaked so it'd look like raining even in the pictures. Howell.

At the start of the year, I took my much needed blog break. A whirlwind of unexpected events happened, and the last thing I needed was to dissect and slice them all up by writing. Documenting every single thing could be overwhelming. While writing has always helped me understand the uncanny and twisted ways of the world better, it drives me to over-analyze them, and you know over-analyzing can get ugly. In the end, it would leave me dead beat, too exhausted to function anymore.

So I changed my approach; I allowed all the worries to simmer until they gradually leave my system. The moment we're speaking, I cannot say that I'm completely stress- and worry-free. Yet I know that I have everything under control, under my control. Just perfect timing to forcefully regain my blogging mojos.

I am writing my comeback entry on the eve of my 23rd birthday.

For the first time in my life, for as long as I can remember, I haven't felt so untroubled about adding another imaginary candlestick on my imaginary birthday cake, until now. Weird, right? I should be more anxious, more afraid and more fretful, because this stage in my life is going to be the most crucial so far. Every day, I will have to make decisions that will influence how I'll be living my life five, ten or twenty years from now. Even the tiniest decisions can have the hugest impact on my future. Most times, they will be the make-or-break kind.

Not that I am complacent. Just confident, perhaps.

It's only now that I can really say with much confidence that I have grown wiser and kinder. Hence, it's just about time that I accept bigger challenges and take greater risks. I recognize that for the past 22 years of my life, I hadn't been wild enough. This year, I vow to be fiercer and more aggressive especially when it comes to what I want and what I believe in.

Cheers to my 23rd year and to my comeback!

Ho-Ho-Ho-Holidays!

2011-01-23T21:59:00.000+08:00

I've been MIA for quite a long while now. A lot has happened since. So pardon my lack of updates, and now, my long overdue entries. Just because I didn't want them to fade in memory unrecorded.

Some things red, gold, green, glittery, and sparkly.

You bet, our home is a Christmas carnival during the holidays. The only thing that's lacking is a fake snow. Blame my mother, the one in the first and last photos.

Never Say Never

2010-12-21T23:58:00.000+08:00

...especially when it comes to fashion.

thrifted leopard print top, thrifted pink skirt, Schu black flats, PRP black slim studded belt

A couple of years ago, I swore I would never ever wear animal prints. To me, they give an on-the-spot whore-ish look. But this year, I hoarded a hill of animal print clothing pieces into my closet. At first, I would only pick a scarf or a slim belt. Eventually, I was already trying on tops and dresses. I learned that with the proper styling, mixing and matching - maintaining everything else minimal - they look sexy and edgy. I also like that they are instant accent to an outfit.

I think my love affair with animal prints would extend until next year. Who knows?

On Class Reunions and Reputations

2010-12-18T10:02:00.000+08:00

thrifted orange chiffon dress, Charles & Keith brown purse, Janylin nude pumps

This is outfit # 2 that I suggested to my sister. She would look stunning in this outfit. It spells cosmpolitan mom.

Aside from crowded malls and super sale here and there, dread-inducing heavy traffic, calorie-accumulating bodies, wish-list making and goal-setting, and dressing up, it is also the time of the year for class reunions. For some, the thought is exciting, but for others, it is simply horrible. Both because of the same reasons of catching up and keeping track with everybody's life.

It has been what, less than 2 years, since I graduated from the university. So for me, it's no biggie deal. Reunions are merely a chance to see friends who have been pretty busy but whom I still get to talk to once in a while, share frustrations in starting careers, and mostly gossip about who's going out with who.

However, for some, like my sister, class reunions can be both exciting and dreadful. It has been 15 years for her, and as expected, class reunion is also judgment day. She will be judged according to whether she was able to maintain her reputation, did less or more than what was expected of her. My sister graduated cum laude; she was known as someone who is an over-achiever, independent, success-craver, and beautiful. In short, she got everything going on to be successful and rich and happy. People will ask, "Is she making enough money?" "Is she having the time of her life in terms of her career?" "Did she meet and marry an equally smart, beautiful, and successful guy who takes her out on vacations and trips?" "Does she have adorable and charming babies, and perhaps a house?"

Nonetheless, at some point, things went off balance for my sister. No matter how much of a control freak she was, things beyond her control happened. Ahh, life. She married a decent man who provides, yes (although everyone knows we would have preferred the other). She finished her MBA and was being offered jobs in this and that company. But this happened in between baby after baby and another baby. She had no choice but to leave her thriving career behind for the more important - no matter how unplanned - family life.

Right now, she's definitely happy having sweet and delightful little kids. Nevertheless, I am certain that if she had it her way, she wouldn't be taking the same route. She would have wanted to excel on her field, be on top of the game and take it slow on the family life. I could sometimes feel her frustrations about how her life turned out to be. There were just times when she could not take it anymore and she would lock herself up to avoid her boys running around and slapping each other. I sometimes feel that she could not fully embrace motherhood because she hasn't achieved and exhausted her full potential yet.

Of course, this is something that she wouldn't want to expose on a class reunion. She would want people to believe that she is happy with the decisions she made. She would want people to believe that where she is now is completely her choice, which I know, is mostly untrue. She wouldn't want to unveil her failures and weaknesses and disappointments. She would want people to believe that she still embodies a powerful woman, someone to be admired and adored.

Like my sister, I am pretty much aware that people do expect quite a lot from me. They always say that I can do anything, that I can conquer anything because I have everything going on for me. I don't always get what they say; I am afraid that I don't see myself as highly as they do. However, if there's one thing I learned from all these, from my sister's situation and the life she leads now, it is that every little decision we make affects our future. When my sister was my age, she was surely more responsible and careful, never spontaneous like me. And when things failed to go her way, she kind of got lost.

So now, I promise to make better judgments and come up with better decisions. So when the time comes, after 15 or 20 years, when I see old and long-lost friends again, I won't get envy or jealous of other people living the lives that they always dreamed of, and I will never have to talk about regrets. I may not measure up to my ex-classmates' definition of success, but I will be happy. They will see that what I made out of my life is a product of my own choices. Not to mention, I will be rockin' and smokin' hot; I will be one of those women who can take care of their families and themselves at the same time. Please, hindi ako magiging 'losyang'.

On Organizing Books

2010-12-09T18:31:00.000+08:00

Beach essentials: my green beach bag, sunblock spray, cellphone, straw hat, sunnies, iTouch, Havaianas, a book

Since the book I chose didn't put me in a reading mood, I stared at the shape-shifting and moving clouds instead. So pretty!

This is a, more or less, three month old draft, and I'd like to believe that I am someone who finishes what she starts. No matter.

As much as I hankered to find out whether the boy who lived did live until the end, I didn't flip more than two pages of the book when I brought it with me to the beach. For the simple fact that, well, this is not a beach book. I wished I bought a book the likes of David Nicholls' One Day - just plain light-hearted and no heart-stopping suspense scenarios.

This made me go over my September goals. What if I organize my books depending on their types - not genres (the difference between the two is based solely on my own explanation). I mean, is it a beach book? Is it a plane book? A coffeehouse book? A short commute book? A long drive book? A bed book? A camping book? A picnic book? How fun would that be, right?

But then again, I don't go on beach trips or picnics that often. And what are the odds of me picking a plane book? Once a year, if I get lucky and rich, maybe? What a pity to those books included in those categories. I was even tempted to include a train ride type of book as if there are trains a la Before Sunrise here. You know, those with pretty and antiquated compartments and where meeting the love of your life is never impossible.

Such a fanciful thinking, but scratch that idea; I have to be realistic here. Although I promise to pick out the perfect book on my next beach trip. I might even single out a Nicholas Sparks' masterpiece even if it's full of mush and even if I'm pretty sure someone would end up being dead. Because I think his works are the beach types. It's just me, of course.

I am such a great 'lil sis!

2010-12-07T23:42:00.000+08:00

thrifted Anna Sui dress, from Macy's green bamboo wedges

Because I am willing to lend my sister this Anna Sui dress of mine for her to wear on one of her reunions with ex-classmates. Guess what, it's thrifted. So no biggie deal! I want her to look like an awesome kickass power woman! :D

In Search for a Perfect Planner

2010-12-04T20:28:00.000+08:00

I like this year's planner. It's definitely better than the last two years. I chose the brown, the one with the wooden feel.

And that's such a cute bookmark!

Now this page has gotta be my favorite. I fell in love with the photo of the store in Camp John Hay, Baguio the first time I browsed the planner. As a result, I googled more photos, and I fell even more in love with it. Now, I'm more convinced that I would love to live in Baguio for a couple of months. It would be great to have morning runs around the area and grab a cup of latte after. In three years, maybe.

...no more.

Like all the previous years, I will settle on this Starbucks planner. I know some people have found it overrated, but I still prefer this over the others. The Belle de Jour Power planner seems too girly and pink for me. On the other hand, the Moleskine is ridiculously expensive, and knowing me, I'm not even sure if I'll find use for it. My planners were all left abandoned after the month of March, tops. And mostly, it's become a tradition that I'd look forward to every year. This would be my fifth Starbucks planner, and the fifth Starbucks planner that I redeemed with the boyfriend. I made sure I'd get it with him, so even if I had the chance to get hold of it when I purchased a Starbucks drink all by myself, I didn't. I got a new promo card instead and waited until we could go and grab coffee together.

And now, some blurry outfit photos wearing basics.

White MNG shirt, random black leggings that needs replacement asap, thrifted gray cardigan, Schu bronze flats, beige MNG quilted bag

November Listography

2010-12-02T17:46:00.000+08:00

thrifted off-white polo, thrifted black w. splatters skirt, PRP brown shoes, Charles & Keith brown purse

Watching: Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 1, Flash Forward, Pretty Little Liars, Cougar Town, Easy A, Charlie St. Cloud, You Again

Listening: Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist soundtrack

Reading and Rereading: White Oleander by Janet Fitch, Charlie St. Cloud by Ben Sherwood, Never Let Me Go by Kazuo Ishiguro, Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist by Rachel Cohn and David Levithan, 13 Reasons Why by Jay Asher

Loving: Harry Potter 7 Part I, book sales, red velvet cupcake from Sonja's, cheap Aldo wrist watches and sunnies, self-control when it comes to shopping and window-shopping, my brown Starbucks planner, browsing travel destinations in the ____-land (Scotland, New Zealand, Switzerland, Poland, etc. ), the boyfriend in his new-old white sneakers and clean haircut and sleek smile hoho

Loathing: sweets that are now forever on my hips, in other words weight gain (ack!!! )

Buying: tote eco bags, long cardigans, long tops to pair with my leggings, which are the only pieces of bottoms I am wearing these days (look up 'loathing' )

Wanting: Toms shoes, wooden Scrabble tiles, Fully Booked discount card, white curtains for canopy beds, Christmas lights for my room, colored cardigans

Not bad, eh? I guess it wasn't unproductive at all.

Lesson Learned from the Great Depression a.k.a Being Broke

2010-12-01T16:39:00.000+08:00

thrifted top, random leggings, Charles & Keith fuchsia wedges, thrifted blaxk studded bag

Quitting work with no sure-thing replacement is most probably the biggest challenge I had/have been facing this year. Or maybe not. It is just the cause. The most challenging, really, is not having enough money or no money at all or being broke, to put simply. And at this point in my life, it is unwarranted to ask from my parents. They've done and given more than enough for me so I could successfully be on my own, supporting myself one day (and I'm past deadline, that 'one day' would have to be starting more than a year ago ). It's actually time to pay them back or stop demanding or pleading for a single penny, at the very least.

But as you all know, I left my first job because I've gotten tired and because I wanted to pursue what I really wanted. And as you all know too, that job was allowing me to earn way more than what I really needed. I could - and I would - go on a mini side trip to the mall and purchase a pair of shoes or a branded tank every so often, and the next thing I knew, it was payday again. You can say that I could afford an above-average lifestyle of a fresh graduate or a first-timer employee. You can say that I was living in excess. I bought too many shoes or clothes that my shoe racks had to be smashed down to build up a new one to give more room to my spanking for-special-occasions a.k.a. would-be-hardly-worn heels and my closet could not be flatly sealed because of clothes clogging. In other words, I have become - not only an impulsive but - an irrational spender.

The time that I stopped working was also the time when I had major trips to Singapore and Boracay where I spent all the money that was left in my account. When I got back, it was the beginning of a new day as a free man. And the demise of my 'to-die-for above-average lifestyle of a fresh graduate or a first-timer employee'.

It has been definitely difficult since then, but honestly, I would not have it any other way. It's true what they say that you will grow up - or move on, in a totally different context - when you have no other choice but to do so.

Avoiding going to the malls is easier than I thought it'd be. I don't feel an itch to check out what's new in my favorite stores. I even broke out of the habit of daydreaming of wearing or owning things I see. And when I'm at the mall, I feel like a dog on a leash. When I am about to enter a store, I feel someone pulling me out of it, taking me back to my senses and warning me (and reminding me ), "No! You know you don't have the money to spend. You'll just end up leaving out of it glum and depressed. Plus, how many more shoes or clothes should be left unworn until you realize that you only have one body and two feet?" With that, I walk away without turning back (okay, fine, I glimpse a bit ), and I feel a lot better. Yes, better than leaving the store with a huge paper bag with a pretty but pricey stilettos in it.

Even my Starbucks coffee intake has curbed. Why bother when my caffeine craving can be satisfied by a lot cheaper Blueberry Tea Latte from 7/11 or a 3-in-one coffee mix? See, I even redeemed my Starbucks planner after about twice the time than it took me during the previous years.

So far, it has been a learning experience for me, and the best lesson that I learned and continue to learn is that I can live on/with less - or in moderation, perhaps. It's just like cutting on baggage. Consequently, I'd feel my life becoming more manageable, unlike when living in excess.

And so, when I start to regularly earn on my own again, I already know what to do and how to do it. I already know the things that I can live without or that I can live with less of. I will be more in control of my earnings, being able to save and put aside funds for the long run.

See, I need not to have a moment's regret. It's good that I learned early on.

On My Bedside Table: Never Let Me Go

2010-11-30T19:15:00.000+08:00

It took me a long while to decide to finally write my thoughts about another one of Kazuo Ishiguro's masterpiece. (By the way, this is his first novel that I read. ) Perhaps as long as the time that it took me to finish reading the book. And it's not even the good kind of stalling. I don't know, maybe I just had a hard time connecting to the story.

The novel is wholly narrated by Kathy H., a 31 year old carer, and this book wholly revolves around her memories of Hailsham, a school for "special" students. The novel is actually divided into three parts. In the first part, she recounts their experiences at Hailsham - how they are being cared for and provided with everything that they could ever need, the guardians who make sure that they know only enough of what lies ahead of them and who constantly remind them of how sex changes everything, the Sales wherein they can get any item that they like from a truck that regularly visits the school to add into their Collection, the Gallery of Madam wherein the best arts are selected and said to be displayed in, and a whole lot more of absurd ideas. Plus, her strange friendship with Ruth at Tommy. The second part, now, discusses their lives at the Cottage. After Hailsham, students are transferred to different 'homes' where they can live - with the same purpose decided upon them - without guardians this time, but with other people that are from other 'special' schools as well. It turns out that Kathy, Ruth , and Tommy are all assigned to the Cottages. I have to inform you that at Hailsham, Tommy and Ruth have become a thing, which continued to the Cottages. However, things have become different. Ruth, in her desire to belong to the 'early settlers' or the seniors, starts to do things a little differently than how they used to at Hailsham. The part ends when Kathy decides to leave the Cottage to move on to the next level. In the third part, Kathy states her stories about her being a carer - to Ruth and eventually, to Tommy, remembering how they were at Hailsham every once in a while. As expected, the thing between Tommy and Ruth does not last, and Ruth, before 'completing', admits that Tommy and Kathy are the ones for each other, and that they should at least try to get the so-called deferral for those who are only truly in love. The story ends tragically, as this tale about the deferrals is proven to be just that, a gossip, a rumor.

I know, it's hard keeping up with what I have been babbling about. So, here's the real deal. Hailsham, as I said, is a school for 'special' students. By this, I do not mean students with disorders or deformities, not even students with above average I.Q. levels. These students, to put it simply, are clones. Test tube babies, perhaps, who are made to be born to be donors to cancer patients when the time has come, until they 'completed'. While they are not being lied to and given false hopes that they can and will live normal lives, they are also not completely informed of what really is out there, the fate that awaits them all. But they don't complain at all, maybe because in a way, they choose not to know.

I do have a lot of issues with this book. I don't think I enjoyed it, more so, loved it. Perhaps it is the strange friendship between Ruth and Kathy. In the book, Ruth is portrayed as a bossy, kind of manipulator, and a go-getter character. But why? Why does she boss around Kathy, who, in the book, is her good old friend? Why, on the other hand, does Kathy allow herself to be bossed around and controlled and embarrassed? I don't think it is explained in the novel. Or perhaps, it is Tommy's odd characterization as well. He is portrayed as a short-tempered and at times, attention-seeking boy. Why? What are the roots of all these? Or perhaps, it is the lack of emotions, all in all. I was readying myself to be crushed, to be torn, to be heartbroken, and to simply be affected, but it did elicit nothing from me. I was simply...blank.

Okay, to be fair, maybe the good reviews and awards are a product of the author's imagination, which nowadays, are never beyond the realm of possibilities. These ideas, no matter how far-fetched, are not impossible and unattainable.Imagine, Ishiguro had the courage to write about - a whole book even - a possibility of a subject, and a scary one at that. But this is also the reason why I - and a few more people - did not like it. It is too scary to even think of, chiefly because it is workable.

Watching the trailer helped me a bit to work up the ideas in my mind, though. I am yet to find a copy of the film, and I do hope that it would be a lot better than the book. What are the odds! I know books are always better than their films, but who knows, the leads might have worked that out and made the film version a whole lot better.

Okay, Blah.

Sunday Dress on a Monday

2010-11-27T23:04:00.000+08:00

I am still in the process of slashing my way out of the so-called writer's block. I need time and concentration to write anything decent, but right now, I lack both. At this very moment, I am putting tag prices on the pretty clothes that I will be selling at the bazaar tomorrow until Monday. I am just ducking out for a while to post these photos because I almost expunged them from my camera a while back without saving them in my lappytoppy.

thrifted brown dress, SM dept. store white braided belt, thrifted black flats, from HK brown satchel

I told you the place is perfect for shoots - lots of dark and grimy but beautiful and interesting corners that appear so fascinating in photos.

Why so stiff, love? Cheer up! Hrhr!

That same day, Monday, we also celebrated our 37th month. Before we parted ways, he said that he just noticed that I was wearing a Sunday dress. It's funny how he still notices and dissects everything about me and makes cute and out of the blue remarks out of it.

Pick-Me-Up Wednesday

2010-11-24T12:45:00.000+08:00

I've no idea why the size of this photo is different. It's annoying, says the OC in me.

Getting my sister a birthday gift - despite my current state, uhm, financially - that she'd love. Look at this pair. Gorgeous, eh? My sister and I went window-shopping just before her birthday, and we saw a suede pumps, just like those, in Zara. She kept trying them on, but I knew that she wouldn't buy them because they cost more than 6K. I remembered trying on a pretty similar pair from the ukay, but they were a size or a half smaller. When we went home, I asked her to accompany me to the ukay. Luckily, they were still there. I hid them *evil grin*. They were a perfect fit, so I got them for her.

Getting her a (slice of birthday cake ). What is a birthday without a birthday cake and birthday candles to blow? I have been keeping sets of candles for birthdays of friends and family. It's become predictable of me.

Discovering a perfect location to have photoshoots. You guess. I dragged the boyfriend so he could get a couple of shots of me. It is an abandoned viewdeck near the Rotonda here in Tagaytay. The place is quite in shambles already, which is why it appealed to me so much. The paints are flaking and peeling off, and turning into pale already. Some walls are vandalized. The bricks are chipped off. It actually reminds me of alleys in New York. Not that I have been there. Plus, it has an underground and a staircase.

Preparing a delicious pica-pica for the family. Out of the blue, I just remembered this pica-pica that my friend was making way back in college. I think it was for a speech? Anyway, I asked for the recipe and she gladly responded. From bottom : Fita biscuit, cream cheese, lettuce, tomato, pesto sauce, and bacon bits. I think I used a different kind of lettuce. I forgot to specify when my mom did her grocery. Still, it tasted grrrreat! They loved it as well! I don't remember what it's called. But I might just call them, Fita Delights? What do you think?

Having hearty and huge meals with the boyfriend. I could not meet the boyfriend on the day of our 37th month, so I made up to him by agreeing to eat at Mang Inasal. He loves Mang Inasal. I do too, but I refrain from it as much as I can because I tend to eat a lot. But because I love him...

Having my picture taken in our dream house. Okay, not exactly in our dream house. At least at the gates of our dream house, or one of our dream houses. I think we have two. This house stands beside Taj of Tagaytay.We love it because of its country theme yet it seems so cosy and homey in it. The view and the location are also a bonus! We would imagine having barbecues outside and growing herbs and vegetables at the garden.

I have been particularly lethargic and depressed lately. I haven't even written decent stuff here. Maybe this is what I need. I need to remember and welcome happy thoughts. I need to get inspired.

A Lot of Firsts for One Day

2010-11-21T01:08:00.000+08:00

Last Friday, it was my...

First time to watch Harry Potter on the big screen. I was never lured into seeing the films before. As a matter of fact, I might just probably be the most recently initiated HP fan. I started reading the series July this year, and I watched all six films a day before I watched the first part of HP7. So far, this one's my favorite. I don't know if it has got something to do with the fact that it was the only film I saw on silver screen. Although from what I've been hearing, this really is the best...so far. I bet the second part would not fail.

Thanks for reserving us the best IMAX seats, Sam! You're ze best!

First time to watch on IMAX. It's a bit of an inconvenience to travel all the way to MOA from where I live, so I never bothered. Plus, I didn't think it would make any difference. I thought it was just a waste of (extra ) money. Boy was I wrong! It's wicked! I can't wait to splurge a little more again. Hello boyfriend! Hello girlfriends! Let's!

I love this mirror. It has a celebrity dressing room-feel.

First time to have a studio picture after the longest time. Ever since digital camera became an item in a What's in the Bag? segment, studio photography had become less in demand. However, that day, I relived the fun of doing it. Quite nostalgic, huh? Read : Tronix days. Thanks to Sam's friend who works as a professional photographer at The Picture Company (cool, yes? ), we were treated with royalty. Hrhr.

First time to really appreciate these pink oxfords. I think they go well with the jeggings! I am wearing these more often now.

First time to be at the seaside. Another embarrassing trivia to share : It was only my second time at MOA, and I never reached this place the first time I went. I usually want to avoid huge crowd, but I am thinking of giving it another try. It's a pretty cool and lively (the good kind ), perhaps place.

thrifted floral top, vintage brown woven belt, Topshop jeggings, Shoeology pink oxfords, Charles & Keith black bag

First time to have my picture taken in a clothing boutique. Like, really taken by someone else, and not just by myself using a camera phone inside a fitting room. Which results to the saleslady reprimanding us. Ooops!

My HP buddy, Sam, who is frequenting this blog lately.

...and his college barkada, plus me.

First time to go out with a group of people I didn't know. A couple of months ago, I already asked Sam to reserve us tickets for the screening. I assumed that it would be just one of those dates that we have. I completely forgot that Sam is the person I know with the most number of friends and acquaintances all over. It turned out that I would be an outcast. Don't get me wrong! They were a bunch of really nice and warm people, and I did enjoy their company and even their inside jokes, imagine! Thank you, people.

I am quite obsessed with lists.

Black and White and Pink Flowers Part II

2010-11-19T22:06:00.000+08:00

Cotton On black body con, Esprit vintage cropped floral denim jacket, Shoebox white wedges

I miss writing real stuff. After this weekend, maybe. Have a good one, lovelies!

Black and White and Pink Flowers Part I

2010-11-16T16:59:00.000+08:00

mom's old floral blouse, Zara black trousers, Shoebox white wedges

I will be posting some ugly and unworthy outfit posts. Just before I throw them all away to the Recycle Bin.

Drawing the Line

2010-11-14T20:16:00.000+08:00

from Bugis, SG top w/ fringes on the shoulders, thrifted leather-like black shorts, Charles & Keith black peep-toe ankle boots, PRP black studded belt

Whenever I surf through fashion blogs, I am always amazed at how each of these girls (or guys ) has a consistent fashion sense. I start from the oldest posts (That's become a habit. I check out the first few pages, and if I go all inspired and stunned, I'll go straight to the Archives and start from the blogger's very first post.) to the newest ones, and I am so flabbergasted that while her outfits and photos have relevantly improved over the months or years, her style sticks all throughout. It happens all the time. That it's so easy to associate a style to a certain famous or even a low-profile fashion blogger. Like everytime I go thrifting, I see a piece of clothing and say to myself, "Wow, this dainty and antiquated dress is so Aya Smith", or "Only the likes of Rumi can pull off this sheer animal-print maxi", or "Aimee can totally rock this chiffon and ruffly top without making it overly-romantic", or "Karla would totally gasp when she sees this over-the-top structured blazer", and I can go on and on. You get what I mean? Isn't it amazing? Well, that's probably what they call 'personal style', right?

I always catch myself cringing whenever the topic of 'personal style' is brought up. Maybe because I cannot fully have a handle on and put my finger on what really mine is. I randomly leaf through my blog to figure it out, which always ends up to further frustration.

I do not think I have a distinct style. Sometimes, I like to dress very girly. Other times, I like to do it basic. A few times, I like to put a touch of edginess and toughness. I like classic and I like vintage. I can lean to soft touches, but I also pick pieces that can be a little rough. I like it covered, but once in a while, I bare a little. It's all tangled and mixed-up.

See, whenever I shop for clothes (which is very limiting due to factors such as money in particular ), I do not mull over whether a piece is me or not me. If it fits, the only question I raise is, "Do I like it or not?" And my shopping range extends from basic shirts to floral playsuits to padded shoulders to lace. But then, when I think about it, no matter how wide-ranging my preference in fashion can be, I can say that I still know if and when an outfit is me or not me.

The thing is, there was a time when I would forget to draw the line. I am pretty sure it started when my readership and following doubled. Sometimes, I would guiltily put on an outfit just because I was presuming that my readers would dig it, that I would gather comments that are more than the usual in number for pulling of a certain trendy - but so not me - look.

The one above is an example of this. I took these photos a couple of weeks or even a month ago. I was meeting a friend, and I was thinking of what clothes to wear. I put on a couple of outfits, which all seemed boring and predictable, and got to this outfit and said to myself, "Oh lookie here! This should be cool enough. If I were still active on Chictopia or Lookbook, this would prolly make it to the 'gallery'. Plus, what a cool outfit to put on my blog, which is now rotting." I immediately took advantage of my sister's tripod that she left and took a few photos. I was on my way out when I realized that it was so pretentious, that it was so hypocrite of me. I thought that if I saw myself walking in this outfit, I would not recognize myself. I would have worn that top, or those shorts with those stockings, or those booties, but not altogether. It is just too dark and too edgy for me. Not to mention that my thighs look awfully huge with that outfit!

And so, I kept my friend waiting and I changed into something more subtle but still fashionable, at least for me, and I felt better and more comfortable.

Since then, I always try my best to draw the line. I always remind myself that I blog for no one but myself. I blog because it pleases me and makes me happy and not because it pleases other people. I blog to express myself and to somehow share my 'personal style' no matter how little idea I have about it and not to uphold a certain reputation. Just because I'm happier and more satisfied that way.

And so, I have no idea how to end this fuss that I started. So, I guess, I should just thank my readers who religiously follow my blog despite the unexciting outfit updates and the unending personal ramblings. *bow*

On My Bedside Table: Charlie St. Cloud

2010-11-12T17:31:00.000+08:00

After reading a rather intense and gloomy story (but a classic, I would say), I wanted something light, and well, I got light. Charlie St. Cloud is indeed a light read, but it's nothing typical. It's a love story without the typical girl-meets-boy-but-there's-a-blockage-along-the-way plot. Or maybe it is, but not the angle that's easily imagined. It's also a story about brotherhood and surprisingly, without the rivalry issue. But in one piece, Charlie St. Cloud is a story about death and about how the person left behind could so much hold on to the lost loved and how he could move forward with his life.

Charlie St. Cloud is an older brother to Sam. They are the best of friends despite having different fathers. One evening, Charlie decides to bring out some fun, so he, together with Sam, pulls an adventure that ends up in a tragedy. They are both killed in a car accident. They are floating in between life and death when they make a vow not to leave each other no matter. Mysteriously, Charlie is brought back to life while his younger brother remains dead. Nonetheless, they stay true to their promise. Charlie refuses to leave town and works in the cemetery, so he can play catch with Sam during sunset in their own playground. He senses and sees people who are in the between life and death phase, a gift that he possesses after his personal experience in it. Things are going smoothly ; Charlie is content with his secret life with Sam despite his dreams and ambition. Until Tess Carroll enters the picture, thirteen years later.

Tess Carroll is no stranger to Charlie. She is a local sailor who is beautiful, independent, and driven. They meet in the cemetery when Tess is visiting her father's grave. It is safe to say that it is love at first, what, encounter. The chemistry is undeniable that they easily imagine having each other in each other's lives in the future. However, there is a twist. Charlie has to let go of Sam to save Tess's life and to move on with his own life.

The story has a satisfying ending. Tess is saved and starts to appreciate the wonders of life when shared with someone. Sam crosses over and discovers that what he used to fear is certainly a paradise. Charlie lets go of Sam and allows himself to live his life by starting on fulfilling his dreams and falling in love.

Ben Sherwood's work reminds me of Mitch Albom's, although he still has a lot to learn from the guy. I do not think there is something special with the writing. Oh, there is! I was tempted to put it down a couple of times because I found it too tricky to comprehend and picture the scenes about the boat. I had no idea what the guy was talking about. How the hell was I supposed to know the parts, the movements, and essentials of a boat?

Nonetheless, I should say that the novel is inspiring with just the perfect amount of mystery. And I guess the most important thing is that Ben Sherwood was able to send his message across.The story shows the readers that it is okay to move on after losing a loved one. Otherwise, we are not only squandering our own lives, which are bestowed upon us with a reason, but we are also making it hard for the people who leave us to discover the afterlife because they are hurt that we are hurting without them. It teaches us that it is okay to let go when the time has come, and that we have every right to embrace our own lives and strive to be happy even after experiencing loss and death. In addition, I also like how the author established his belief in miracles like the dead being revived back to life. Lastly, he did a good job with the introduction and the afterword of the fireman. His words are rousing. However, it is quite misleading ; I thought the story would be narrated by him.

Wrapping up, it is till a worthy story to read. Don't expect too much on the writing and style though.

Anyway, don't you just hate it when you get book covers based on the film adaptations? I do! Even if it's Zac Efron! Sadly, the original cover is no longer available. Whhhhhy!? Okay, enough. Time to hunt for the film copy now.