Flicken's Blog

Women's Sexuality in Classical Fiqh

noreply@blogger.com (Flicken) — Fri, 01 Aug 2008 21:00:00 +0000

This entry is going to make some people uncomfortable, and justifiably so I must add. The reason I chose to post this is to counter the tsunami of misinformation (both intentional and unintentional) that is being spewed around the Internet, in newspapers, and on television. Many people seem to believe that recognition of women's sexual rights was born in the United States circa 1960. On the contrary, if we are to believe much of what we hear and read, Muslims have brought nothing but repression and suffering for women. Thus, in order to dispel some of these myths, I choose to quote from Fath Al-Mu'een, a classical manual of Shafi'i fiqh, whose author, Al-Milibari, died in 1579 CE (987 AH). Whenever the text was ambiguous, I relied on Abu Bakr Shata's (d. 1893 CE/1310 AH) supercommentary, I'anat Al-Talibeen.

Al-Milibari says:

يجوز للزوج كل تمتع منها بما سوى حلقة دبرها ولو بمص بظرها أو استمناء بيدها، لا بيده، وإن خاف الزنا، خلافا لاحمد، ولا افتضاض بأصبع. ويسن ملاعبة الزوجة إيناسا، وأن لا يخليها عن الجماع كل أربع ليال مرة بلا عذر، وأن يتحرى بالجماع وقت السحر، وأن يمهل لتنزل إذا تقدم إنزاله، وأن يجامعها عند القدوم من سفره، وأن يتطيبا للغشيان، وأن يقول كل، ولو مع اليأس من الولد، بسم الله اللهم جنبنا الشيطان. وجنب الشيطان ما رزقتنا. وأن يناما في فراش واحد والتقوي له بأدوية مباحة بقصد صالح: كعفة ونسل وسيلة لمحبوب فليكن محبوبا فيما يظهر.

It is permissible for the husband to enjoy his wife in every way (except for her anus), even if by sucking her clitoris or having her manually stimulating him to orgasm, but not by him manually stimulating himself, even if he fears illicit sex, contrary to Ahmad [ibn Hanbal]. It is impermissible to perform defloration with a finger.

It is recommended:
To fondle one's wife in order to increase intimacy,
Not to leave her more than four nights without intercourse without an excuse [such as menstruation],
To seek out the pre-dawn hours for intercourse,
To slow down so that she can experience orgasm if one's orgasm precedes hers,
To have intercourse with her upon returning from travel,
That both apply perfume for the embrace,
That each of them say, even if they despair from having a child, "In the name of Allah. Oh Allah, ward off the Devil from us and ward off the Devil from that which you provide us with", and
That they sleep together on a single spread (or mattress).
Using permissible medication to gain strength for lovemaking with a noble aim (such as chastity or procreation) is a means to something desirable, so it would appear to be desirable as well.

It is worth noting that the Shafi'i school of jurisprudence holds that female circumcision is obligatory. It is quite clear from the above that the understanding was that a woman's clitoris would at least still be partially intact in normal circumstances and that women were expected to experience orgasm. If Islamic Law really was about repressing women, why are men being told to sleep with their wives at least every four nights and to slow down if they reach orgasm first?

TV as a Form of Social Programming

noreply@blogger.com (Flicken) — Sun, 27 Jul 2008 17:22:00 +0000

Noor is doing peacefully what Bush was never able to accomplish: colonizing people effectively by entertaining them instead of bombing them. Had Bush been smart about it and opened a cross-cultural exchange with Iraqis, he could have probably had all the oil he's currently getting at a fraction of the price and with more security. Then again, Bush did Iraqi Muslims a favour by bombing them; they wouldn't have returned to our religion otherwise. I'm now beginning to appreciate the subtle, forward-seeing intelligence of the Muslim Electorate of US Elections 2000.

Another show that was an obvious case of social programming was Three's Company. Mr. Roper was the anti-homosexual straw man that we could all laugh at for being a backwards prude. The idea is that if you portray your enemy as a dolt, people will stop relating to him and everything he stands for. Mr. Roper was essentially Hollywood's representation of what it meant to oppose homosexuality. In a classic straw man argument, Hollywood attacked a weakened opponent.

Health Stories

noreply@blogger.com (Flicken) — Fri, 25 Jul 2008 08:58:00 +0000

In case you didn't know already, soy is bad for men's virility. I think this story should be tagged as, "Duh!" Doesn't everyone know this by now?

Also in the news, detox gone wrong.

I keep wondering when people are going to put away their fads and just eat a traditional diet.

Frugal Fat Fun

noreply@blogger.com (Flicken) — Sat, 05 Jul 2008 11:45:00 +0000

I don't eat vegetable oils (with a few exceptions, such as olive and sesame seed oils) for health reasons. (Yes, I know that everything you've heard so far is that vegetable oils are better for you than naturally saturated fats, so maybe it's time you read Know Your Fats, put together by the Weston A. Price Foundation. The whole philosophy of the WAPF is to follow a traditional diet.)

The problem these days is that affordable naturally saturated fat is getting harder to come by. Super Market Al-Madina Al-Riyadiyya used to carry clarified butter from Egypt but they're out of stock now. (I'm not sure if this is permanent or temporary.) All they carry now is European or Australian, which is about 11 JD for 2 kg or less; the Egyptian equivalent was under 6 JD. There is no local clarified cow butter, only clarified sheep butter, which is also pricey.

An alternative is to buy fatty sheep tail (Ar. layyah, or ilyah/alyah if you want to be pedantic), which the butcher shops currently sell at 2 JD/kg. Ask them to get you a bunch of them and grind them up in their meat grinders. You can then melt them down in a pot on low heat. Leave it until you get a pot full of pure, rendered liquid fat with some cracklings floating on top. Scoop off the cracklings with a perforated serving spoon or filter them out using a metal filter. Add salt to the cracklings and enjoy. The liquid fat delivers an extremely nasty burn, so be careful. Be sure to avoid having the fat come into contact with water so it doesn't splatter. Also, if the fat is kept away from moisture, it won't need to be refrigerated for months. Don't pour hot liquids into plastic as it can release unhealthy chemicals. Instead, use metal or glass. Glass will generally not shatter if you put a long metal object in it while pouring a hot liquid into it. Once the fat cools, it will be a solid, white substance called, "tallow." (The equivalent product from pig fat is called, "lard.")

You might wonder how anyone in their right mind would consider using such a substance as a substitute for butter. In fact, gourmet European and American baked goods are often made with lard, so tallow presents a halal substitute.

How to Ripen Fruit

noreply@blogger.com (Flicken) — Sat, 05 Jul 2008 11:43:00 +0000

To help your fruit ripen, try any of the following:

Put it in a brown paper bag and roll the top of the bag shut on it.
Wrap the fruit in newspaper.
Burn a kerosene lamp next to it.

I've tried the first two; the third I heard about in high school but never tried.

The Anti-Careless Email Filter

noreply@blogger.com (Flicken) — Thu, 03 Jul 2008 17:28:00 +0000

There are numerous ways to spell Abu Fluffy:

Standard anglophone spelling: Abu Fluffy.
Arabs whose first language is not English might spell it: Abo Fluffy.
En français: Abou Flouffy.
Salafi spelling: Aboo Flufee.
Weird spelling: Abu Phluphy.

It turns out that my real name is spelled en français, and my work email address looks something like abouflouffy@someclothingcompany.com. I have thought about the possibility of adding abufluffy and all other common spellings as email aliases so that I don't ever miss an important email. However, I decided against it. Why would I ever want to receive emails from people who are too lazy or careless to look up my email address, ask for it, transcribe it from my business card properly, or write it down properly over the phone? I actually now think that the unusual spelling of my name is a blessing: it keeps the careless out of my inbox.

Originally, I was going to refer to such careless people as idiots, but it turns out that one of my best friends is a graduate from Columbia (and intuitively it seems that there must exist a definition of idiot that Ivy League graduates don't fit) and he made this very mistake. This is the guy who landed me my current job and facilitated my move to Amman, for which I am very grateful. He left my employer just as I joined it, and I told him that, despite my love for him as a friend, I was very relieved that he left the company; I knew I'd never be able to work with someone like him. I mean, how difficult is it really to look up someone's email address or ask for it before sending off an email that ends up getting lost? Duh!

For a while, I thought that I was pedantic and unforgiving of mistakes because I was a programmer, but I've worked with umpteen programmers that are not pedantic. Rather, I think I gravitated towards programming because it's so unforgiving. I remember the lab assistant for first year chemistry telling me that they were ecstatic if they got results of 80%. Personally, I was horrified. I don't care if it works 99.999% of the time; it has to be perfect. Programming and mathematics provide the unforgiving, get-it-right-or-fail mindset that I seem to have been born with.

Evolution: A Debate by Two Muslim Thinkers

noreply@blogger.com (Flicken) — Wed, 02 Jul 2008 16:44:00 +0000

It's here.

Maysoon & Mu`awiya

noreply@blogger.com (Flicken) — Mon, 30 Jun 2008 21:20:00 +0000

Mu`awiya ibn Abu Sufyan, the first Umayyad Caliph, married Maysoon, a beautiful bedouin woman from the tribe of Kalb. After a few months of living under the strictures of city-dwelling nobility, which to her meant being confined like a domesticated animal, she composed the following lines:

لبيت تخفق الأرياح فيه----------أحب الي من قصر منيف
ولبس عباءة وتقر عيني--------- أحب اليّ من لبس الشفوف
وأكل كسيرة في كسر بيتي-------أحب الي من اكل الرغيف
وأصوات الرياح بكل فجٍ---------أحب الي من نقر الدفوف
وكلب ينبح الطراق دوني---------أحب الي من قط اليف
وبكر يتبع الاضعان صعب-------أحب الي من بعل زفوف
وخرق من بني عمي نحيف------أحب الي من علج عنوف
خشونة عيشي في البدو أشهى-----الى نفسي من العيش الطريف
فما أبغى سوى وطني بديلا------وما أبهاه من وطن شريف

A house that winds rattle in
Is more beloved to me than a lofty castle.

Wearing a `abaya while being content
Is more beloved to me than refined raiment.

Eating a small scrap of bread in a nook of my house
Is more beloved to me than eating a loaf.

The voices of winds in every gorge
ٍAre more beloved to me than the beating of drums.

A dog that barks away night visitors
Is more beloved to me than a house cat.

A difficult camel calf that follows sheep
Is more beloved to me than a swift-footed husband.

An emaciated oaf from among my cousins
Is more beloved to me than a rough lout.

The coarseness of my livelihood in open country is more desirous
To my soul than exquisite livelihood.

So I do not desire other than my homeland as a substitute
And what a magnificent, honourable homeland it be!

Upon hearing these verses, Mu`awiya divorced Maysoon, who returned to her family. It turns out that Maysoon was pregnant with Yazeed ibn Mu`awiya; she breastfed him in the desert for two years and then sent him to live with his father.

Comment Complications

noreply@blogger.com (Flicken) — Mon, 30 Jun 2008 20:34:00 +0000

I set up Blogger to have comments moderated and delivered to me by email. Unfortunately, it looks like not all comments are delivered by email. (Yes, I checked my spam folder.) Today, I noticed that three comments are waiting in Blogger's web administration interface. I will address them shortly, insha' Allah.

Kenyan-Canadian Coffee Cajolery

noreply@blogger.com (Flicken) — Mon, 30 Jun 2008 17:53:00 +0000

Yesterday, I went to buy coffee for the company. To my surprise, the shop close to the office carries Kenyan coffee. I ordered 500 grams with two thirds golden and one third dark and had it ground. By the time I reached the office I realized I had made a big mistake: this was supposed to be for American drip coffee but it was ground too fine, as if for Turkish coffee. Of course, it didn't work in the drip coffee machine. The murasil at work made me Turkish coffee out of it but I don't really like Turkish coffee, so I can't comment fairly.

Later yesterday while I was in a lesson, I received a missed call and then a text message from a fellow Vancouverite expat (who happens to be a good guy other than the fact that he likes Caffe Artigiano, but alas, no one is perfect) telling me that he bought me a quarter kilogram of the preferred bean of Egyptian-Canadian coffee connoisseurs: Kenyan AA. I picked it up today and gave the Ministry of the Interior very clear instructions: grind coarsely (by Arab standards), increase the amount of coffee, and let it cook longer. She did so and the results were absolutely to die for: the first shot was bold and full of subtly complex yet fruity notes. By the third shot, the much-desired acidity had set in.

Apparently, my Kenyan-Canadian friend found the shop that sells these wonderful beans next to Gerard's ice cream shop in the Abdoun Circle; I believe it's called Baraka Coffee or something similar. He paid a premium too: 4 JD for a quarter kilogram; in contrast, nibari goes for 1.70 JD per 250 grams.

Muslim Obama Supporters: Please Have Your Heads Checked

noreply@blogger.com (Flicken) — Sat, 28 Jun 2008 18:08:00 +0000

It is beyond me how some American Muslims are touting Obama as the greatest thing since, um, I'm not really sure since what, but since something great anyways.

Let's check the facts:

Obama has openly and unequivocally pledged support for Israel. Do you think he was joking?
Obama has made every attempt to distance himself from his father's (arguably former) Islamic roots. People like this usually feel the need to make a point; in order to show his loyalty to America and Christianity, he's likely going to be more anti-Muslim than he needs to be to keep the favour of the huge pro-Israeli lobby on Capitol Hill. This phenomenon is actually quite common among African-American officers in the US Army: they often give other African-Americans a hard time to show them they're not going to take it easy on them just because they're the same race.
The guy is a democrat. As if immoral foreign policy wasn't enough, here comes a wave of domestic moral relativism. Expect more abortions and gay rights.

I'm not suggesting for one minute that McCain is a better candidate. I really don't think it makes a difference at this point: for so many foreign policy decisions, the point of no return is a faded memory. There is no turning back on Iraq and Afghanistan, and support for Israel is a part of the catechism of every realistic presidential candidate.

As a reminder, Muslims and Arabs voted as a bloc for Bush in 2000. The vote was so close that Muslim and Arab support was clearly a factor in Bush's success. The issue at hand was that Muslims and Arabs were mortified that Liebermann, a devout Jew and Israeli citizen, might become Vice President of the United States of America. "We voted as a bloc! We helped Bush succeed!", people were announcing in the mosques. Allah taught us a lesson: whoever seeks dignity through anything other than Allah is humiliated.

Sorry, I don't have a workable solution today, just some grumpy ruminations. Whether you vote or not, it doesn't make a difference: expect more invasions of Muslim countries and undying support for Israel.

Building a Rocket Stove

noreply@blogger.com (Flicken) — Fri, 27 Jun 2008 07:54:00 +0000

Learn how to build your own rocket stove by watching this video.

Returning to American Fundamentals

noreply@blogger.com (Flicken) — Thu, 26 Jun 2008 15:11:00 +0000

OK, so some days I'm grumpy. Today I'm not.

The fundamental principles of the founding of America are very enlightened. Any society where people can be brought in as slaves and then fight civilly for equal rights and win has some fundamental good in it. It just so happens that shortsighted jingoistic idiots have ruined America's name internationally, brought its economy to the brink of bankruptcy, and replaced its moral values with a directionless state of moral relativism. (Did I mention that I'm not grumpy today?)

Over the past few weeks, glimpses of that fundamental good have resurfaced. First, there was the Boumediene vs. Bush decision, that said that the Military Commissions Act was an unconstitutional suspension of habeas corpus rights. Today, in the District of Columbia vs. Heller, the Supreme Court banished the 32 year old prohibition of owning handguns in the nation's rotten core. The District of Columbia's handgun laws were as bad as Canada's laws. I am hopeful that there will be a drop in crime now that law-abiding citizens can own handguns, insha' Allah.

Off with Their S's!

noreply@blogger.com (Flicken) — Fri, 20 Jun 2008 08:32:00 +0000

After trying to explain a bit of the evolution of French spelling to some co-workers yesterday and having them only grudgingly believe me, I tried looking up the matter without coming up with anything concrete. While this article on the circumflex does mention that the circumflex indicates a dropped s in French, it doesn't actually spell out the history of it.

The French revolutionaries decided to drop the silent s that followed a vowel and preceded a consonant; it was the spelling of the Marquis and simply had to go, along with their heads. (Revolutionaries often change language, the names of months, etc.) In order to show that they weren't simply ignorant (for the pedantry runs deep in French blood), they annotated the preceding vowel with a circumflex: côte, fenêtre, hôpital, râpé are all examples of this. École is another example of a word with a dropped s (being derived from the Latin schola, from which we get the English school), but for some reason an acute accent was used in place of the circumflex in this example.

Who Wears the Pants?

noreply@blogger.com (Flicken) — Sat, 14 Jun 2008 17:51:00 +0000

It's old news by now that Yves Saint-Laurent kicked the bucket. (Or should I rather say that he kicked the pail blue?) However, I think it's worth reflecting upon the fact that a homosexual is crediting with popularizing women's trousers. It only takes a moment's reflection to realize that trousers were originally men's wear, and that it would make sense for a homosexual to want to, "improve" women by making them dress more like men. What doesn't make sense is for women to welcome this change. Practically, it is likely that women will remain subjugated to the tastes of men for the foreseeable future. After all, it makes complete biological sense for a woman to attract the attention of a mate. (I am intentionally avoiding a discussion of men being subjugated to women's taste in order not to digress.) However, at the very least, straight men should reject fashions that have been dictated by those who don't even find women attractive. Were they to do this, women would also reject them, out of necessity. (Not many women would consciously dress in a manner that made them unattractive to men.) Of course, it's not just men's clothing that has been dictated to women: the unattainable boyish figure that keeps women slaving away at diets is dictated by an industry dominated by men who find boys more attractive than voluptuous women. How strange is it, then, that some people insist that the Islamic dress code for women has been imposed upon them by misogynistic men?

Comments Now Being Moderated

noreply@blogger.com (Flicken) — Sat, 14 Jun 2008 17:42:00 +0000

Due to the recent use of profanity in a comment on, Coffee Grumblings, I have decided to moderate comments to keep them clean. I'm a big believer in keeping discussions open, so I'm not about to curb even the harshest criticism, but I do want to keep things clean, insha' Allah.

Coffee Grumblings

noreply@blogger.com (Flicken) — Sat, 14 Jun 2008 12:47:00 +0000

Let's establish a basic fact: Starbucks sucks. In fact, most coffee in the US and Canada is awful. I've found that the majority of coffee on that continent is either watery or burnt and bitter. I can put up with the watery stuff (such as like what finds at Tim Hortons and 7-Eleven) but I just can't understand people actually paying for and enjoying what they get from Starbucks or Caffe Artigiano; their coffee is so bad, bitter, and burnt that one wonders if they cleaned out an ashtray and heated it as a low-cost alternative beverage while charging a whopping premium for it. (Some days, I think that you can sell whatever garbage you want if you just market it properly, and yes, some days I'm grumpy.) I tried dumping out half my mug of Artigiano toxin and replacing it with milk and the beverage was still awful. While living in North America, I coined the phrase, al-qahwatu qit3atun min al-3adhab: coffee is a portion of punishment. Seattle's Best I can actually stomach, though not enjoyably. The only commercial coffee in North America that I actually enjoyed a great deal was Van Houtte. Their coffee is so good that I actually enjoyed their Columbian blend and French roast; with other brands, I normally hate them because they're so bitter. However, the real crown prize goes to Van Houtte's Kenyan blend. The high acidity and subtlety of flavours is to die for. It is no surprise that only 10% of arabica beans meet Van Houtte's standards. There's a saying that when pizza is good, it's really good, and when it's not good, it's still pretty good. This doesn't hold for coffee: there's plenty of repulsive coffee that's not worth drinking.

While I like the plain, unsweetened Bedouin coffee that my in-laws serve, I'm still striving for the perfect cup of sweetened coffee here in Amman. I tried finding Kenyan coffee but it doesn't seem to be readily available. I explained to one coffee seller that I wanted higher acidity. He suggested that I try a nibari blend of two-thirds light roast and one-third dark. (Note: the Arabs do not burn their coffee into oblivion, so what's considered a dark roast in the Arab world is probably medium in other places.) The result was fairly impressive. It was definitely tasty and worth drinking, though it can't match a good cup of Kenyan brew. Now all that remains is for me to find out what Nibar translates to in English: it's an Indian city, but which one? It could be Nurpur, Nagpur, Nandurbar, or a host of other cities that begin with n and end in -pur or -bar.

Granular Ruminations III: Processed Corn Stinks

noreply@blogger.com (Flicken) — Tue, 10 Jun 2008 22:57:00 +0000

There is something particularly unpleasant about the smell of microwavable popcorn and corn chips; they really smell like dirty socks and diapers, respectively. I've had to put up with this smell for several years while working in the United States and Canada. Recently, I found that I was not alone in my disdain for the smell of microwaved popcorn: someone at work nuked grits with the office door open, causing our neighbours across the hall to complain that they were close to suffocating. (Of course, I don't find the smell of cigarette smoke that their employees inundate us with any better.) To add insult to injury, one day my beloved co-workers prepared microwavable popcorn with cheese flavouring. Later that day, I received the following email:

As-salaamu alaykum Mr. Abu Fluffy:

I just entered the other office right now, your office, and you are right the smell of the office stinks just like old socks. So on behalf of me and Hiraganasan, we would like to apologise for the smell.
Ps. The popcorn isn’t ours even! But we volunteered to make it :(

Alhamdulillah, they've stopped making microwaved popcorn since that day, at least when I'm around.

Granular Ruminations II: Islamic Law and the Food Crisis

noreply@blogger.com (Flicken) — Sat, 07 Jun 2008 18:11:00 +0000

Introduction

Anyone who has been reading or listening to the news over the past months has taken notice of the food crisis. Prices have risen at an alarming rate and yet there is no actual world-wide food shortage. The problem is not with the amount of food available, but rather, with its management. Not surprisingly, there are Islamic laws and guidelines that, if followed, would alleviate, if not eliminate, much of the problem. After discussing the content of this article with a friend, he laughed it off, indicating that the non-Muslim subjects of Islamic lands -- let alone non-Muslims in their own countries -- were not bound by many of the prescripts of Islamic Law. While this is true, disobeying Allah has dire consequences even when not legally punishable in this world. Scholars are unanimous that non-Muslims are not required to pray or give zakah, yet we find them regretting this in the Hereafter, as Allah mentions in the context of believers questioning the denizens of Hell:

قالوا ما سلككم في سقر قالوا لم نك من المصلين و لم نك نطعم المسكين

They will say, "What brought you into Hell?" They will say, "We were not among those who prayed nor did we used to feed the poor."
(Qur'an, 74.42-44)

Furthermore, the strongest position within Islamic scholarship is that those who have never heard the message of Islam will not be punished in the Hereafter, yet it is obvious that alcoholism and other vices are destructive even if one is not morally responsible for avoiding them. Thus, the point of this article is not to present solutions that can be applied over a short timespan, but rather, to provide material for people to reflect upon regarding the wisdom of Islamic Law. Allah Most High says:

ظهر الفساد في البر والبحر بما كسبت أيدي الناس ليذيقهم بعض الذي عملوا لعلهم يرجعون

Corruption has appeared in the land and the sea on account of what the hands of men have wrought, that He may make them taste a part of that which they have done, so that they may return.
(Qur'an, 30.41)

In explaining a number of verses, classical texts of Qur'anic exegesis leave no doubt that ignoring the commandments of Allah often results in hunger and natural disasters. The focal point, as mentioned in the above verse, is that people reflect upon what is happening to them and thereby return to Allah in obedience.

Problems and Solutions

Ignoring the obvious, like the prohibition of crop destruction and stockpiling to keep prices high, there are a number of other Islamic regulations regarding food:

The prohibition of waste. A recent article in the Star indicates that 210 million kilograms of food is thrown out in Toronto each year, most of it edible, and much of it in its original packaging. It doesn't take an economics major to realise that the less we waste, the less we buy, thereby decreasing the demand for food, and ultimately dropping its price on the market.
After graduating from high school in 1990, I spent my summer vacation in Egypt. It pained me to see bread shamelessly thrown into the garbage. In Egypt, the word for bread is `aysh, meaning, "life." It is as if this waste foreshadowed the tossing of Egyptian life into the rubbish mounds: eighteen years later, Egyptians would die in bread riots. Further back in the early seventies, my parents had immigrated to Canada and my father worked on a ship with a number of Italian-Canadians. Upon finishing his lunch, a young man proceeded to drop-kick the unwanted remainder of his sandwich over the side of the ship. An older Italian man saw this and punched him so hard that he spun around a couple times under the force of the blow. "During the war, your mother would have slept with someone for that piece of bread", he told him. If life is sacred, then anything that attenuates life-support must necessarily be profane.
Islamic Law mandates that a certain portion of crops be given to the poor. Zakah is not charity: it is the property of the poor and farmers are obliged to discharge it. Under an Islamic state, the ruler takes the zakah by force from those who owe it and distributes it among worthy recipients. The Hanafi school is the strictest in this regard, declaring zakah due on all crops. The more lenient position of the Shafi'i and Maliki schools is that zakah is only due on staple crops (i.e. those that can be stored long-term and provide primary nutrition) such as grains, legumes, dried dates, and raisins. (A Shafi'i scholar in the United Kingdom told me that the zakah of Eid Al-Fitr, which must be paid in the staple of the land according to the Shafi'i school, could be paid in potatoes in a place like Ireland. This would seem to indicate that it is considered a staple crop and zakah of crops would be due upon it as well.) Taking the lenient Shafi'i position, zakah is only due on crops if the yield is greater than 715 kg of grain. Ten percent of eligible crop is due if it is watered naturally and five percent if grown on irrigated land. In 2006, the world produced over 695 million metric tons of maize, 634 million metric tons of rice, and 605 million metric tons of wheat. Assuming that 95% of farmers produce more than the miniscule 715 kg of grain per crop and that they all irrigate their land (thereby qualifying for the lower zakah percentage) means that 33 million metric tons of maize, 30 million metric tons of rice, and 28.7 million metric tons of wheat are already the property of the poor. Again, this is not charity: this is their property according to Islamic Law.
Alcoholic beverages are almost entirely based on staple crops, including grains, grapes, and potatoes. A colossal amount of food is being wasted in the production of products that are interdicted by Islamic Law. Were these foodstuffs to be used in feeding people, they would flood the market and the price of food would drop dramatically. This idea is not as revolutionary or Islamicentric as it might seem: Open Fight to Keep Grain from Liquor was published in the New York Times in 1917 and was unrelated to any temperance movement.

Postscript

The above points are a mere sampling of some of the more obvious ways in which Islamic Law can alleviate the food crisis. There are certainly other laws that regulate foodstuffs that I did not mention above because I'm not sure how (or if) they affect the cost of food. There is also the more general worldwide price increase of everything that is tied to the increased price of petroleum, which in turn is due to a lack of peace and political stability in Muslim heartlands, but that is beyond the scope of this article.

Granular Ruminations I: Three Words for Wheat

noreply@blogger.com (Flicken) — Sat, 31 May 2008 19:00:00 +0000

There are three common words for wheat in Arabic: burr, qam7, and 7intah. A scholar of Arabic once told me that there were no exact synonyms in Arabic. Rather, each word had connotations not found in the other words. (This statement assumes, of course, dialectic unity, for exact synonyms do exist across dialects just as they exist across different languages.) Thus, I became gripped by a need to know the differences among these words. After asking a few people and coming up with nothing, I decided to research the matter in the major lexicons of the Arabic language. Instead, I searched over 5200 texts (using the amazing Al-Maktabah Al-Shamilah) and found a gem of information that will soon be disclosed, insha' Allah.

Getting to the kernel of the matter, burr is the dialect of the Hijaz, and is considered the most eloquent word for wheat. Scholars of Arabic rank the dialects of Arabs who were ruled by non-Arabs or accepted religions from outside of Arabia (and thereby prayed in non-Arabic tongues) as inferior and less pure than the dialects of Arabs who did not have as much foreign interaction. The word burr is of the same root as barr, which means, "land." In fact, the Arabs say Abarrat Salma, meaning, "Salma traveled by land" and Abarrat al-Ard, meaning, "the earth produced much wheat." The colour of wheat that is ready for harvest is similar to the colour of earth in Arab lands, so at least one connection is clear.

As for qam7, the strongest opinion is that the word is from a Levantine dialect of Arabic (though some claim it is Coptic). Furthermore, it does not mean wheat in all its phases, but rather, from the point that the grain matures to after it is harvested. Thus, young blades of wheat could not be referred to as qam7. As for 7intah, it is a Kufan dialect of Arabic but is otherwise synonymous with burr in that it can be used to describe the wheat plant during all of its phases. 7intah is related to verbs meaning to bear fruit, but also to embalm or mummify; all of these meanings can be seen in the yielding and eventual maturation and storage of wheat. Finally, the reason that these two words are considered less eloquent than burr is because the Arabs of the Levant and Iraq were under non-Arab rule at the time, and were therefore influenced by other languages.

The Axis of Virtue

noreply@blogger.com (Flicken) — Sat, 24 May 2008 01:07:00 +0000

Abu Dawud mentions that the hadith, "Part of one's being a good Muslim is leaving alone that which does not concern him" is one of four hadiths around which rulings revolve. The details of the four hadiths can be found in the hyperlinked biography of the imam but have been summarized in two couplets:

عمدة الدين عندنا كلمات________من قول خير البرية

اترك الشبهات وازهد ودع ما_____ليس يعنيك و اعملن بنية

meaning,

The basis of the religion, according to us, are words
From the speech of the Best of Creation:
Shun doubtful matters, be abstinent, leave that
Which does not concern you and act with intention.

I Love Being a Nobody

noreply@blogger.com (Flicken) — Tue, 20 May 2008 20:47:00 +0000

When being the most powerful man on earth means that you're responsible for this sort of thing, I am very grateful to be a nobody. No power means no ability to inflict suffering. Why would anyone in their right mind ever want to have such a burden on their shoulders? I can only think of one reason: they do not believe in accountability.

Mansafotography

noreply@blogger.com (Flicken) — Mon, 19 May 2008 17:30:00 +0000

Back in university, they mentioned that the best way to test a cryptographic algorithm was to encrypt a really good joke that no one else knew and send it to a bunch of cryptanalysts. While cryptanalysts might try to conceal the fact that they've broken your algorithm or key (so that they can continue spying), it is reasoned that the temptation to share a really good joke is just too difficult for anyone, even those who rub crystal balls in the dark dungeons of the NSA.

Today a co-worker forwarded me an email that contained a series of remarkable pictures of mansaf. The picture above was one of two shots included under the category of, "Civilized Mansaf." This is actually a picture I took of the meal presented to my wife and me at her family's house upon our return from our honeymoon in Egypt. I uploaded the picture to a public photo sharing site on the Internet. However, it raises the question: if you want to know if the Jordanian Intelligence is spying on you, would you upload to your private photo-storage encrypted shots of the most scrumptious mansaf preparations possible and then wait to see if they surfaced in some mansaf appreciation society's emails?

All-Natural Energy Snacks

noreply@blogger.com (Flicken) — Sun, 11 May 2008 18:48:00 +0000

Take a bunch of dates, cut off the tops, carefully remove the seeds and fill with roasted coffee beans. I ate seven of them and they're extremely effective. For maximum effectiveness, use lightly-roasted robusta beans.

Arab Phone Companies

noreply@blogger.com (Flicken) — Tue, 22 Apr 2008 02:58:00 +0000

This was circulating around the office yesterday. (Sorry, it can't be translated.)

اتصالات الإمارات

أخي المواطن.. إن الرقم الذي طلبته لا يمكن الاتصال به الآن يرجى الانتظار أو المحاولة مرة أخرى

الاتصالات السعودية

ترى الجوال اللي نغزته يا ناغزك الشر مقفول .أقول انتظر دقيقة أو جرب إنغزه نوبةٍ ثانية، رجِّيتنا الله يرجك.

الإتصالات اللبنانية
حبيب ألبي..شـو.. عيوني الموبايل بٍيزي كتير كتير فإما بتنتزر أوإزا في مجال دء بعد شوي ..مرسي كتير كتير.

الإتصالات الهندية

سديق .هذا موبيل ما في سغل ألهين ولا يمكن بند مشان هو زعلان سويه.. أنت في سوية وقف ممكن انت ييجي بعد سوية دقيقة في كلام أحسن .. آب كي موسكان باهوت بياري هي.

الإتصالات الأردنية

ولا. كم مرة صرت حاكيلك الزفت مش فاضي ؟؟ خليك ملطوع عالخط أو إنطز سكّر واتصل بعد ما الزلمة يفضالك ..الله يقرفكو زي ما
بتقرفونا، إيه

الإتصالات السودانية

إن الرغم اللي زربتوا ما موجوود.. ممكييين تدق ليهو تاني؟؟ آآآآآي

الإتصالات المصرية

يا فتاح يا عليم يا رزاق يا كريم........

شوف يا حلاوه الزبون بتاعنا يا مطنش يا بيحلقلك ..

لم الدور وهوينا واتصل لما الغزاله تروق.

الاتصالات السورية

لك يبعتلك حمه شايف تلفونه مسكر ليش اكل الهوا رجاع دقلوا بعد شوي