Flirting with Forty

Finally 40!

2010-04-27T06:16:00.000-07:00

Another trip around the sun - complete!

Looking forward to seeing what 40 brings - new opportunities, experiences, outlook.

Part deux here I come!

Final days of being a 30 something woman

2010-04-19T22:09:00.000-07:00

In seven days I will no longer be a 30 something woman...wow! It's almost here. Now let the count down begin!

Taking a closer look at the board (part 3)

2010-04-07T06:00:00.001-07:00

As a successful event planner it is important to have the necessary tools available so that your event executes flawlessly. Those items include my laptop, BlackBerry, passport (remember the vision it to be a world class planner) along with cash, lip balm (gotta keep the lips kissable), business cards and a note pad and pen to jot down ideas for future fabulous events. The key here is simple...just having the right tools necessary to be successful.

With the right tools...I'm able to plan events that are innovative, sophisticated and timeless each and every time. This picture represents one of those events (and no this isn't one of mine...at least not yet). I am asking the universe to bring to me those clients that can bank roll one of these beautiful events. :-)

Taking a closer look at the board (part 2)

2010-04-06T06:00:00.000-07:00

The next item on the board is money. Now the goal is not necessarily to have a LOT of money (although it would be nice), this money represents financial freedom. To have the ability to live comfortably, to do some traveling and simply to enjoy life you need to have some level of financial freedom. I realize that you will ALWAYS have bills to pay however the goal is to be able to pay them, save some and actually enjoy it.

My BFF Oprah said to me (and about a million other people) once that if you do what you love the money will follow. I believe that. Planning events and running my own boutique event planning company is something that gives me great joy and I'm also pretty good at it too. I know that if I keep plugging away, doing what I love(event planning) that the money will follow.

Universe if you hear me...I'm asking that you shower me with the ability to have financial freedom. Money come to me now!

Taking a closer look at the board...

2010-04-05T06:00:00.000-07:00

In my last post I showed you my vision board for 2010. This board is a visual representation of some of the goals that I would like to accomplish for the year. Now I know for some of them I'm reaching a little bit however you never know what can happen. Sometimes by just putting things out into the Universe will yield unbelievable results. And hey, there is nothing wrong with dreaming. Like my pastor said in one of her sermons, God's creation of the world probably started with a dream and look at what He accomplished!

So now that I have shared with you the board, I thought I would talk about each element of the board. Today is a two-fer

It all starts with a great quote and this one happens to be my favorite one for 2010 by my favorite imaginary BFF Oprah. This year I am focusing on preparing for the blessings that I know God is going to bestow on me. There are a few projects that I have been dreaming about but that is all I've been doing is just dreaming about it. And although they say you are to start with a dream...some sort of action is required. This quote simply reminds me to act or like the Nike ad states "Just do it".

Well I'm sure you know who SHE is....this is my imaginary BFF Oprah. Did you get a chance to check out the caption? Okay now you can't blame a girl for dreaming. One of my life goals is to one day be on the Oprah show and to also plan one of her events for her. Maybe the Legends Ball 2012? I can see it...can you?

How do you know where you're going if you don't have a plan?

2010-04-03T12:56:00.000-07:00

Last night I caught up with a good friend of mine and we met for dinner. It was great seeing her and having some much needed girl time that was so long over due. During dinner, she mentioned how she has decided to become a Life Coach specializing in goal setting and helping people reach their goals. Being an amazing artist, she described to me one of the visual techniques she is thinking about using with her clients. She got the idea from her goal collages that she used to make every year around her birthday. After the birth of her 2nd child, she kind of got away from making them, however one day she stumbled on one she made right after she got married.

I thought the idea of making a goal collage or as some people call them vision boards is a GREAT idea! I am a huge fan of The Secret and they talk a lot about putting things out into the Universe and creating vision boards is one of the things they encourage. Now I am big of having a plan and setting goals, however I am terrible when it comes to writing them down. But there is something said to putting you plan on paper...it makes it real, and ultimately makes you accountable. I also believe that there is power in writing your goals/dreams down. By doing so you are telling the universe that this is what you want...and sometimes it comes true. I will be the first to tell you that this is true. You see last year while at work, I created a list of things that I wanted to accomplish and when I wanted to accomplish them. I printed the list and stuck it in a folder and well I forgot about it. This was back in August 2009. One of the items on my list was to quit my current job by January 4, 2010. Now keep in mind, I did not think about it nor did I look at the list again for the rest of 2009.

Then last month, while at my new job I was looking though my bag and came across the folder and the list that I had long forgotten about. While scanning through the list I came across one of the goals that I had wanted to accomplish by January 4, 2010 which as quit my job and it dawned to me that I had actually accomplished my goal. You see my start date at my new job was January 4, 2010! I was speechless, the power of the universe, the power of God was at work and all I had to do was claim it.

On the drive home from dinner, I started thinking about what goals I wanted to accomplish for 2010. I started to visualize how I wanted my life to be within the next 12 months. This morning I put together a little visualization board. Here is it...

I'm thinking about printing the collage and keeping a scrapbook of all of my accomplishments...yes, I'm claiming it all ready. In future posts I will go into detail about each element of the vision board. This project didn't take a lot of time and it was actually quite fun, looking for the pictures.

So there...it's out there. The universe knows what it is my heart desires...now I just have to put the plan together and that should be easy.

Do you know where you're going? Do you have a plan in place? And remember ~ "He who fails to plan, plans to fail."

Smashing the FAT!

2010-01-17T21:36:00.000-08:00

For the next 90 days, I will be smashing the fat and working towards a healthier life and a smaller jean size. My three new best friends for the mext three months will be:

My scale...

My Fat Smash Diet and Workout Journal

More to come about the diet in a later post.....

One Word 2010

2009-12-29T22:54:00.000-08:00

One of the many blogs that I have enjoyed following is Ali Edwards (check her out here). One of her post this week talked about picking one little word to focus on for the New Year with the challenge being finding ways to incorporate that word into your everyday life. After reading her post a word immediately popped to mind – simplicity

Sim-plic-i-ty

Noun

• The state, quality, or an instance of being simple

• Freedom from complexity

• Absence of luxury, pretentiousness

• Freedom from deceit or guile; sincerity

• Absence of complication

Synonyms: ease, effortlessness, minimalism, unfussiness, straightforwardness; candor; openness; modesty; integrity

For me 2010 is about going back to the basics, going back to a time when things were less complicated. Over the Christmas holiday I received word that my sister’s godfather had passed. I was devastated by the news as his death was unexpected. As I was sharing the news of my loss with a friend, I started to tell her stories about my childhood memories of him and the nickname of “Mean Mary Jean” that he had given me when I was a little girl; suddenly I was flooded with good memories of days past when life for me was just simple.

Through the course of the week I found myself reflecting on days when you knew your neighbors name, when the adults in the neighborhood knew every kid on the block and always watched out for them as if they were their own.

A time when there were no computers, emails, IM, Blackberry, cell phones, Facebook, and Twitter used to communicate with friends/family. No during those days you either had to go visit them, call them on the phone or actually write a letter.

There were no X-box, Wii, or Playstation to entertain us; we had board games, kick ball, tag, hopscotch, Barbie dolls and riding bikes. Back to a time when adolescent obesity was not an epidemic because children were outside running, jumping, riding bikes and just playing all day long.

A time where cartoons only came on Saturday mornings and then after that you were outside playing with your friends; there was no such thing as staying inside and watching TV all day long. Going back to a time where there were no DVR’s, TiVo, and On Demand to entertain you all day.

When you could actually listen to the radio and hear music that was suitable for all ages.

A time of simplicity.

What happened? How did things get so complicated?

My goal for this year is to focus on the simple things in life – spending quality time with my family, playing board games together, going for a walk, bike riding, flying kites, and having picnics in the park or better yet in our back yard. I want to focus on spending more time at the table talking and less time in front of the television. Spending less time texting and emailing friends and family and more time visiting them, talking to them on the phone and maybe even write a letter or two.

2010 is also about living a simplistic life. It’s not about having the most stuff, but surrounding myself with items that serve a purpose, items that are functional and practical. It’s also about getting healthy – going back to the basics, fruits, vegetables and whole grains; staying away from fast foods and processed foods.

This year is about removing those things and people that make my life difficult/complex and surrounding myself with those people/things that bring me happiness and joy.

It’s about looking at life from the stand point of the glass being half full…

Simplicity…

Thankful - 11/17

2009-11-17T14:09:00.000-08:00

Today I am thankful for being blessed with new friendships that are meant to last a lifetime.

Thankful - 11/16

2009-11-16T14:04:00.000-08:00

Today I am thankful for my AM Starbucks Peppermint Mocha that gave me the extra boost I needed.

Thankful - 11/15

2009-11-15T13:58:00.000-08:00

Today I am thankful for that quite time that I so love when the house is still and I can be with my thoughts.

Thankful

2009-11-14T08:00:00.000-08:00

Today, I am thankful for 8 awesome women who have made my life so much richer by offering me their unyielding friendship and for providing me with memories of good times that will last me a lifetime. “I LOVE you guys!”

FOR TODAY - November 13, 2009

2009-11-13T12:15:00.000-08:00

Outside my window...bright and sunny fall day

I am thinking...about how nice it will be to work for myself again full-time

I am thankful for...my family, great friends, and awesome co-workers who make coming to work a pleasure

I am wearing...jeans and a pink top

I am remembering...that good things come to those who wait

I am going to...finish my long awaited project so I can get this business started again

I am reading...The Four Agreements

I am hoping...that I can hang in there for another 8 weeks

On my mind...comfort in knowing that GOD has big things planned for me

Noticing that...time is going a lot faster now that I am older - if only it would slow down just a bit

Thankful 11-13-09

2009-11-13T11:54:00.000-08:00

Today I am most thankful for God blessing us with a beautiful sunny day and dry ground.

Remembering to be thankful...

2009-11-12T13:58:00.000-08:00

Me and my sister 1976

Today I am thankful for having an amazing sister who is also my very best friend.

-----

There is a prompt circulating on Facebook where everyday for the month of November up to Thanksgiving, you are to think of one thing that you are thankful for and put it on your status. I think that this is an EXCELLENT idea as sometimes we get so wrapped up in what isn't going right or our way that we lose sight of those things that really matter to us. This challenge also goes hand in hand with another one that I am doing with a co-worker and that is not complaining for an entire month (this one is going to prove challenging for me right now).

Thoughts on a Thursday

2009-10-22T11:26:00.000-07:00

Atlanta traffic is for the birds. No matter how early I leave for work my 27 minute commute (according to my GPS) ALWAYS takes me at least 60 minutes or more. argh!

Although I'm not fond of the fact that I have to work outside my home, I do enjoy the quiet that comes with the morning drive. This my time to ponder on all of life's great mysteries...solve all of my problems (like what I'm cooking for dinner tonight)...and to dream wonderful dreams.
As I get older I am discovering that common sense isn't so common. I have also discovered that have very little patience for stupidity.
Son #1 showed me his report card this morning. According to him he said that he forgot it was in his book bag (yeah right). It was okay...not the best but due to the fact that we did move him to a new school half way through the first card marking - so we're giving him a pass this time. However, I did tell him that his dad and I expect there to be a significant improvement on the next one.
I have enjoyed reading the following blogs this week: Ali Edwards, Making It Lovely, Yeah Write
I am really excited about decorating our new house. I have decided to start with Mini Me's bedroom. We purchased the crib this past Sunday (I love IKEA) and this weekend we will get the paint. My good friend who is a very talented artist is going to paint her room (that was her baby shower gift to me). I will post pictures as we progress with the project.
Just ordered Writing Motherhood (read about it from Ali Edwards site). It looks like it will help me with writing all the wonderful stories that I'd like to share.
Lately I have been feeling a little restless/anxious. I know that I should be doing something different than what I'm currently doing (working for someone)...something that brings me joy (event planning - being creative)...and I know what it is (duh - event planning)...however I am letting little things distract me. You know things like looking at Facebook, reading my favorite blogs, staring out the window day dreaming. Doing everything BUT what I need to do to get to the place I long to be.

Getting things in order

2009-10-20T19:43:00.000-07:00

I love this bag. My mom gave me this bag when we were visiting her and my dad over the summer. When she gave me the bag, she had filled it with great reference books on starting a in-home daycare (which is what I was doing). My mom is awesome!

I have since replaced all those wonderful books (I still have them, they are now kept safe in my bookcase) with books, magazines, print outs from websites and other miscellaneous items (glasses, body spray, lotion). All of those items are important to me as they represent all of the great ideas that I would like to implement (well with the exception of the glasses, body spray and lotion). Everyday I take this great bag with me to work...never taking anything out, but always putting things to take home to look at later. And when I get home, this same great bag just sits in either my car or in the kitchen - never touched until the next morning when I sling it over my shoulder to take with me to work. (I can hear that Erykah Badu song "Bag Lady" playing as I carry the bag to and from work)

This bag represents me right now...full of great ideas...all jumbled up...not being implemented. Inside this bag is ciaos and disorganization...this is my life right now. You would like to think that I would have it together at almost 40 but I do not. So the goal for right now is to clear out the bag and put the contents into some sort of order maybe even getting rid of some things that I just don't need. Isn't it amazing that something as small as this bag can represent something a big as my life?

Are you carrying around a bag like me? What's in your bag?

Remembering "small tiny steps everyday" will eventually get you to your goal.

Question - is your bag weighing you down?

Taking 5 small steps every day

2009-10-08T12:43:00.000-07:00

I am NOT a fan of Atlanta traffic. This is what greeted me this morning as I was traveling on I85 headed northbound.
Not a pretty sight as you can see. Traffic was moving at a snails pace - and I was going to be late to work again! That meant I needed to call my manager, which I didn't want to do because well...because I just didn't feel like dealing with her and all her pettiness. BUT I had no choice. I HAD to call her because I had already been given a written warning for being late (that is another post) and I got an extra slap on the hand for not calling management to inform them that I would be late.

So I called (and boy was I NOT happy about doing it).

And I sat in traffic....

"Man, I wish I could be at home...working for ME...not going to work to deal with the BS and getting someone else rich." If only...I thought.

Then this afternoon while going through my bag I came across this index card dated August 5, 2009. On the card was the following:

"If you are clear where you are going and you take several steps in that direction every day, you eventually have to get there. If I head north out of Santa Barbara and take five steps a day, eventually I have to end up in San Francisco. So decide what you want, write it down review it constantly, and each day do something that moves you toward those goals." - Jack Canfield, American Author and Motivational Speaker

Talk about seeing the right thing at the right time! This is just what I needed to see today!

So....I wrote down 4 things that I wanted right now

I have put it on paper...I have made my request to the universe. Now it is time to work, to do what is required in order to bring the things that I have written to fruition.

And so it has been written.....

My Top 10

2009-09-25T12:50:00.000-07:00

I just wanted to share a "little" bit about me - as I am today. :-)

TEN things I can't live without - my Blackberry, iPod, coffee, gum, hugs and kisses from my kids, laptop, WiFi, Reality TV, smoked almonds, sunny days

NINE words I live by - love, forgiveness, compassion, honesty, integrity, faith, joy, hope and loyalty

EIGHT bands/artist whose music keeps me company on any given day:

Ledsi

Maxwell

Mary J. Blige

Jill Scott

Maroon 5

Sting

Dwele

Angie Stone

SEVEN things I love about my everyday life

Sunday - going to church with my family, reading the paper, clipping coupons, spending quality time together (with my family).
Monday - The start of a brand new week and looking forward to all the "good" things it will bring.
Tuesday - Watching the boys at football practice - observing how they are getting better and better as each practice passes.
Wednesday - Not having to go to football practice, taking my time to cook dinner and actually eat a meal as a family. This is also our "family meeting" night.
Thursday - Watching RHOA (Real Housewives of Atlanta). Yes I hate to admit it but I am a reality TV junkie!
Friday - Knowing that this marks the end of my work week at the J.O.B. and now I can devote all my time and energy on spending time with my family.
Saturday - Football...football...and more football!

SIX places I'd love to visit before I die - Italy, Spain, Africa, Martha's Vineyard, Grand Canyon, Napa Valley

FIVE things I do everyday without fail - brush my teeth, shower, have a cup of coffee, kiss and hug my kids, say "I love you"

FOUR stores/websites I frequent - Target.com (come on who doesn't love Target?), aliedwards.typepad.com (great at telling life stories), twitter.com (yes, I tweet), amazon.com (you can find anything on amazon!)

Three photo's I love

Reading some of my favorite blogs that I follow

Loving on my children

My trusty Dream Machine (who ever came up with that name?)

TWO decisions I've never regretted - marrying Byron (he is truly the one for me) and moving to Atlanta

ONE additional thing about me - I am trying to be the best Erika I can be.

Today, I give myself permission...

2009-09-25T11:30:00.001-07:00

Last week one of my sands (for all you non-Greeks ~ my sorority sister) was in town for the weekend and she wanted to get together with me and our other sands that also lives in Georgia. Getting together with them was just what I needed. I was in desperate need of some "girl time" and what better way to spend it than with your good friends. As usual we spent the night catching up on what was happening in each other's lives. When it came time for me to give my update, I told them that I was still at my J.O.B. and not really "feeling" it anymore. I really don't see any growth potential within the company and if I stay at the company I will be at this desk (see below) for a long time.

As the night progressed my sands said something that really struck me...she simply said that she felt that I was waiting for "permission" to leave my J.O.B. That I was waiting for my turn to come around. Boy was she right on the money! But it was the next statement that she made that REALLY hit home...she simply said that it could be possible that "my turn" will never present itself. That what I need to do is give myself permission to finally leave my J.O.B. and pursue my entrepreneurial endeavors. She said that I might be surprised to find that this [following my entrepreneurial dream] may be the thing that catapults my family to the next level.

WOW! {that is what I was saying in my head}

You know the funny thing is that she wasn't saying anything that was new to me. Because God knows I have had this same conversation with myself in my head. I think what actually did it for me was actually hearing those same words out loud and coming from someone else. You know it's one thing to know that you are on to something great...to have confidence in yourself and your abilities but its another thing to have some else say it to you. That was just what I needed!

The is of my desk at my J.O.B. I think it's a lovely desk and as much as I complain about my desk, for the past 287 days this desk has helped provide a steady stream of income and health benefits for me and my family. And for that I say thank you desk. But all things must come to an end and beloved desk our time to part is coming up soon. Today, Friday September 25, 2009, I hereby give myself permission to pursue my dream full-time which means that I will have to leave you dearest desk. But don't you fret my love for I know that someone will soon come to take my place and she too will come to love and appreciate you and in return you will provide her with all of the good things that you have provided me with.

WHEW! Saying that felt good...freeing!

Why is it that we wait for someone else to give us permission to live our lives the way we want to? Is this what almost being 40 feels like? If so then I like this feeling!

I GIVE MYSELF PERMISSION!

THANKS SANDS!

Now its time for me to map out the plan... :-)

This is me, right now, on 9/24/09

2009-09-24T14:32:00.000-07:00

I was...going to be a famous movie star when I was a little girl

I am...a dreamer

I think...often about how cool it would be to live in a villa in Italy

I wonder...what it feels like to be a princess

I wish...that I could eat anything I want, when I want and NOT gain any weight

I save...all of my kids artwork, notes, cards and school papers

I always...say "I love you" everyday

I can't imagine...my life without Byron and our three amazing children

I believe...that I can be anything I want to be - even at 30 something...

I promise...to always be the BEST Erika I know how to be

I love...surrounding myself with the people that mean the world to me

Hindsght is 20/20

2009-09-24T11:39:00.000-07:00

Today while I was in the break room at work, a co-worker walked in and announced that today she was celebrating her birthday. When asked by another co-worker what age did she decided to celebrate, she proudly stated that she was celebrating her 21st birthday again. Wow! To be in my 20's again...what would I do differently, if anything?????

So I started thinking...you know the saying "Hindsight is 20/20"? Well what if I could go back in time and talk to the younger Erika, what 20 things would I tell her about life and all its joys and pains to help her prepare her for what is to come? I'm going to have to give this one some thought tonight.

However in the meantime, I'm going to throw this question to you...

If YOU could talk to the younger YOU...let's say 10/20 years ago...what 20 pieces of advice would you give yourself? What lessons learned would you share about life...love...relationships...money...career?

I would LOVE to hear what you come up with?

In the meantime I'm going to give this some deep thought. So check back to see my 20 things.

Where's Erika?

2009-09-23T12:23:00.000-07:00

I remember when I was younger I used to absolutely LOVE the Where's Waldo books. I would spend hours looking through the book trying to find Waldo. I wonder if they still make those books? Anyway lately I have been feeling like Waldo...lost in the sea of life and I'm sure some folks may have been wondering "Where is Erika?" (yes sands I'm talking about you! wink...wink)

Well here I am! :)

I've just been hiding out. For a minute there I was wrapped up in this thing called life and hadn't had time for me. Funny how that can happen sometimes. Then this past weekend I was hanging out with two of my sorority sisters and I was gently reminded that it is important that I make time for myself. That is okay to put things on hold for a little "me" time. This project...writing this blog is something that I truly enjoy. It is allowing me to be that "creative" person that I have always wanted to be. It also relaxes me...think of it at cheap therapy. :) So from this day onward I need to carve out a little time to this project.

That is the goal...

What I'm currently reading...

2009-08-25T14:00:00.000-07:00

While I was back in Detroit visiting family and friends, I had a chance to have dinner with my sorority sisters and one of my sands recommended this book

She said that she read this book during a mini vacation she took by herself. According to my sands, it was a life changing book for her. She spoke about having clarity in her life after reading it and I could see that she had a peace about herself that I too wanted to experience. So when I got back to Georgia, I rushed out to Boarders and picked it up for myself. I'm hopeful that I too will gain that same clarity of life that she did from reading it.

I'll keep you posted...

Sometimes you just have to take a step back

2009-08-25T11:11:00.000-07:00

Last week was just one of those weeks that you wished would just hurry up and end. I was dealing with some things both at work and personally that I felt were beyond my control (and for those who “really” know me, know that I like being in control), so this series of situations I found myself in were really taking a toll on me. I could feel myself starting to get anxious, stressed and down right mad. I was almost ready to say “forget it all” and just throw in the towel.

Then I received a phone call this past Friday from a really good friend and sorority sister. She was out taking care of some business and she said I crossed her mind, so she decided to call me. She wanted to see how I was doing, and if I was still moving forward with my plans to start my business. Our conversation was really short; however it was just what I needed at that particular moment in time; that brief conversation provided me with the opportunity to “step back” from all that was going on around me and really take a look at the situation. I’m so glad that she called (thanks M.P.) :-)

Lesson for learned – when you feel that certain situations are just beyond your control, sometimes you have to take a step back in order to gain a new perspective and regain control.