FloriDUH

Massage service -- and can I get my oil changed, too?

Tue, 14 Jul 2009 14:30:00 -0500

How's this for service? At the new Lexus of North Miami, customers can get their teeth brightened while their tires are rotated. Haircuts, manicures, workout sessions -- even boutique shopping -- are available at the country's largest Lexus store under a single roof, reports the Miami Herald At the salon, women can have their hair styled or their make-up done. Customers can relax in the ''Zen room'' -- complete with a waterfall machine -- or get a massage. It even has a boutique shop that sells name-brand apparel and accessories, including Callaway golf clubs, Spyker rugby shirts, Otazu jewelry and Invicta watches. And for those who just want a beverage and a snack, the dealership has a cafe and a juice bar. While the dealership charges for some services, use of most facilities is free. The North Miami store sits on 10 acres and has 116 service bays, and a lounge where customers can watch the mechanics work. ''Pretty awesome,'' said Kim Hernandez, a 20-year-old University of Florida student working out on a StairMaster. ``It makes everything a lot easier. It's like an inconvenience to me to have to get [my] car serviced. I'm actually just doing everything here that I was going to do anyway.'' Hey, they forgot a tattoo parlor. Photo: Lexus of North Miami More FloriDUH

Killer mailbox: You have more than swine flu to worry about

Tue, 14 Jul 2009 11:00:00 -0500

So many dangers are lurking out there. Enraged drivers. Swine flu. Crazy people with guns. And mailboxes. In this tragic but true story, one moment a 20-year-old Ocala woman is riding along in a pickup. The next minute, she sticks her head out the window as the truck is moving. And then the next: Her head collides with a mailbox. Police say the driver drove the victim to Northside Hospital just after 1 a.m., reports wtsp.com. She was pronounced dead at the hospital. Is there a lesson in all this? More FloriDUH

You have a work van parked at home. You're in trouble now

Tue, 14 Jul 2009 10:00:00 -0500

Got a work van? Then you're not welcome in Casselberry. Population 24,000. Median household income: $44,000. The city has been busy writing code enforcement citations. "You are hereby notified," the letters begin, and then go on to say they're in violation of Casselberry ordinance 3-10.9 A, 1, C, 3. Translation: Your work van or truck with your equipment on the ladder rack is parked in front of your house. City officials say they're trying to "revitalize" the city, improve a downtrodden image and increase property values. The ordinance calls the vehicles "visual blight." The mayor's term: "commercial intrusion." The commissioners have agreed to back off a bit. They decided to allow the owners of the vans and trucks to park them in their driveways as long as they take off the ladders and tools when not on a job, reports the St. Petersburg Times. Now we're asking you: Is your blight your right? More FloriDUH

Look who's naked -- and swimming with sharks

Tue, 14 Jul 2009 06:45:00 -0500

When we hear "swimming with sharks" we think of the working world. You know, insane bosses, petty politics, backstabbing co-workers. But at least every one is dressed. This story about swimming with sharks has naked people in it. So it's a lot more interesting than office griping. Seems am Oldsmar woman who told authorities she'd fallen from a boat off Fort De Soto was rescued from the Gulf of Mexico Saturday night, reports tampabay.com. She was naked. Clare Louis, 39, was spotted several hundred feet offshore Fort DeSota Park in St. Petersburg at about 3 a.m., after Park Supervisor Jim Wilson heard her cries for help. Half an hour earlier, Russell Hernandez, 37, of Lakeland came ashore by himself near Gulf Pier. Hernandez called 911 from a borrowed cellphone on the pier, prompting a search party. He was naked, too. Hernandez said Louis fell overboard at about 11 p.m. and he dove in after her but couldn't find her and swam ashore. "They had a lot of luck," said Wilson because the gulf was full of bull sharks due to tarpon season. They stripped off their clothes to be able to swim. Both refused medical treatment. But we assume they accepted towels. Photo: Florida Museum of Natural History More FloriDUH

Need a ride? Don't steal this car

Tue, 14 Jul 2009 06:30:00 -0500

All Luis Leonel Vilar wanted was a ride home. So he stole an unmarked police car. The car belonged to an off-duty officer who was working security at a Flanigan's Seafood Bar and Grill in Hialeah. When he left work about 4 a.m. he found his Ford Taurus missing. Broken glass littered the pavement where the car had been parked. The 24-year-old felon was so nonchalant about it that he even parked it in the parking lot of his condo, about a mile away. Residents were able to point police to his condo the next day, reports NBC News. He didn’t even bother removing the guns from the car. Oh, and the car came with a lot of law enforcement goodies like weapons, ammunition, riot gear -- and possibly even an emergency light. “We really don’t know what state of mind he was in when he decided to steal it,” a Hialeah police spokesman said. We don't know either. But we have a hunch. Photo: Luis Leonel Vilar was arrested Saturday, one day after he allegedly stole an unmarked police car. NBC News Miami More FloriDUH

Love, love, love. When do we get a honeymoon like this?

Tue, 14 Jul 2009 06:30:00 -0500

OK, DUH purists. Fair warning. This isn't a DUH. It's an "awwwwwww." Sometimes we gotta acknowledge that everybody in this state isn't drunk, drugged, crooked or crazy. OK, we have to hunt hard to find the exception but when we do.... Take these 70-year-old high school sweethearts, Betty and Clyde Jackson of Edgefield, Ga, who recently re-created their 1959 Daytona Beach honeymoon -- when their car was newer, they were younger and $300 bought a vacation for two. Photo: Jackson family photo Clyde and Betty Jackson in their 1956 Ford Thunderbird. Below, the car before it was restored. Their original car has been restored for about $30,000 -- a surprise gift from their daughter. As far as Clyde Jackson knew until Father's Day last year, the rusty convertible was in a shed at his former Georgia peach farm, now a cattle ranch, reports the Daytona Beach News Journal. During the honeymoon, they went to the beach and a Bandshell concert. It happened again on Sunday, when they enjoyed Sal Ronci's band and fireworks. This time they're staying in an oceanside timeshare. The restored car, valued at about $85,000, sparked the second-honeymoon idea. "It was a dream come true," he said, and he began making second-honeymoon plans. "I am just so excited to ride down the streets of Daytona in the car again, back where I was in the beginning," Betty Jackson said. "And to walk on the beach and put my toes in the water. And the concert was wonderful, just hearing the old songs, and to hold Clyde and dance with him." We're misty eyed, really. With disappointment, actually. Just realized this lovely couple is from Georgia. Photo: N-J | Sean McNeil At the Main Street approach on Sunday, Betty Jackson, with husband Clyde behind the wheel of their 1956 Ford Thunderbird, strikes a pose just as she did below on the same car from their 1959 honeymoon in Daytona Beach. More FloriDUH

Man caught exposing himself -- his excuse didn't fly

Mon, 13 Jul 2009 14:00:00 -0500

Bradford Biggers, 51, of Norwalk, Conn. is accused of exposing himself to a 14-year-old girl at Typhoon Lagoon, a Walt Disney World water park. A witness spotted Biggers position a chair a few feet from the girl and do the nasty deed. When the witness yelled at Biggers he left the park. An off-duty deputy stopped Biggers for questioning, reports Click Orlando. Biggers said he did not intentionally expose himself to the girl and blamed his European-style bathing suit, which he claimed was too tight, according to deputies. Guess his excuse didn't fly. He's being held at the Orange County Jail on no bond. More FloriDUH

Stand up and be counted? Where are you standing now?

Mon, 13 Jul 2009 12:00:00 -0500

Hey, what's wrong with Southwest Florida? We've stood at Corkscrew Swamp and been swarmed by mosquitoes and had a fine time, thanks. But Southwest Florida, other than Everglades National Park, is noticeable absent on a new Web site that lists the top 100 places to stand in the United States, reports naplesnews.com. The photo sharing, social networking Web site StoodThere.com includes seven locations in Florida from South Beach, Miami to Universal Studios in Orlando. But the Web site’s 10 employees didn’t include any of the local beaches that have consistently ranked among the best in the country. “Whoever made that list obviously hasn’t been here,” said Bill Huop of Bonita Springs. Hey, we can think of tons of great spots all over Florida, too. Especially, SoFla, our home, sweet, sweaty home. So, where are the top spots where you've stood? Here's the Stoodthere.com list. More FloriDUH

Truck has four tires, two doors, oh, and this......

Mon, 13 Jul 2009 07:00:00 -0500

Nothing like driving around in this heat with a grenade in you truck's toolbox. That's exactly what happened in Port St. Lucie County. The owner of the pick-up truck first noticed the grenade in the truck's toolbox about a month ago, when he first purchased the vehicle. He finally called 911 after being prompted by a friend to call law enforcement, reports TCPalm Now explosive experts at the St. Lucie County Sheriff’s Office will take apart the pineapple-style grenade. Officials said the grenade appeared to be a live weapon. So, dude, what took you so long? More FloriDUH

Belly up to the bar or baby sit? What would you do?

Mon, 13 Jul 2009 06:30:00 -0500

This is the problem with kids. You gotta watch 'em. All the time. Even when you want to go to a bar and have a great time. Dusty Krogman, 23, from Ohio, went to a Fort Myers beach bar to have drinks with friends. He also had a kid in his charge. So he just left the kid at a Bonita Springs hotel. Around 10 p.m. Lee County deputies responded to the American Hotel, where the young child had been left unattended and had been wandering around the hotel property for at least a half hour, reports the Naples Daily News. Cops contacted Krogman, who returned to the hotel 45 minutes later. He was arrested and charged with child neglect without great harm and contributing to the delinquency of a minor. To which we say, "Cheers!" Photo: Dusty Krogman, LCSO More FloriDUH

Bend over -- the doctor wants to see you now

Mon, 13 Jul 2009 06:00:00 -0500

HELP WANTED: Folks of all ages to play the role of sick patients. No experience necessary. You'll help future doctors hone their skills. A crush of applicants — more than 100 people — already have answered the call to be pretend-patients-in-training for the first class of 40 medical students at University of Central Florida, reports the Orlando Sentinel. You won't get rich or win an Oscar by playing a diabetic in distress. You might also be asked to "open wide and say ahh" or, in some cases, to "bend over." The part-time gigs will pay $12 an hour with no benefits. You'll earn even more if you volunteer for exams of a more private nature. UCF eventually will provide training for standardized patients willing to participate in pelvic and prostate exams, for which they will earn separate fees: $60 for a female pelvic exam; $30 for a male rectal and genital exam. You won't get rich doing these either. The schools will limit the number of exams per patient. And, really, how many times a day do you want a pelvic exam? More FloriDUH

What the devil? Now he's losing baseball games

Sun, 12 Jul 2009 17:00:00 -0500

First they were the Devil Rays. Then in 2007 this perennial last-place team officially shortened its nickname to simply "Rays." The next year, they were in the World Series. But at Saturday's game they must have felt nostalgic. They put the "Devil" back on their uniforms for that night's game. Big mistake. By the game's end, their catcher was in the hospital, their manager had been ejected and their four-game winning streak was ended by a 7-2 loss to the Oakland Athletics, reports the Lakeland Ledger. We just seem to play better in a Rays uniform," said manager Joe Maddon. "That was not pretty." Maybe the devil made 'em do it. Photo: Tampa Bay Rays pitcher Matt Garza reacts after giving up a two-run home run to the Oakland Athletics' Rajai Davis during the seventh inning of a baseball game in St. Petersburg, Fla., Saturday July 11, 2009. (AP Photo/Brian Blanco) More FloriDUH

A rock star's concert is cancelled. What does he do?

Sun, 12 Jul 2009 13:30:00 -0500

Get lost in a purple haze of drugs? Throw a party? Find a groupie to pass the time? Dream on. Aerosmith's Tampa show was cancelled. Lead singer Steven Tyler couldn't walk this way because he has an injured leg. So lead guitarist Joe Perry focused on combing ocean reefs for trash instead of perfecting guitar riffs Saturday, reports the Sarasota Herald Tribune. Perry was accompanied by his wife, Billie Perry, and about 85 other divers who dedicated the day to scooping up trash left in the waters off Lido and Longboat keys. The Perrys have a second home on Longboat Key. "We yanked out a bunch of trash -- everything from a big chunk of fiberglass to 20 feet of rope on an anchor," Joe Perry said. "This is the kind of thing that makes people realize you can't just throw stuff off the side of the boat." Billie Perry cut out several feet of fishing line from sponges that could entangle other marine life. Over 200 pounds of trash was collected -- real heavy metal. Afterwards there was a party. But it wasn't the same old song and dance. The after-party helped raise money that will benefit Mote's Center for Coral Research. Atlanta native Wesley Pate, 17, who came to Southwest Florida for the concert but stayed to participate in the dive. The guitarist said he rarely signs guitars, but made an exception for Pate on the condition that he not sell it. "I have no intentions to sell this," Pate said, holding up the freshly-signed instrument. "Joe Perry is the reason I picked up a guitar." Now that's sweet emotion. Photo: Aerosmith guitarist Joe Perry and his wife, Billie, helped with the cleanup. Sarasota Herald Tribune. More FloriDUH

Show me the money! Oh.....it's gone

Sun, 12 Jul 2009 07:00:00 -0500

Who said money doesn't grow on trees? Three stolen ATMs were found in a dense wooded area in Daytona Beach. All three machines had been lifted — literally — and stolen from two hotels near the Daytona Beach International Airport, between November and June, reports the Daytona Beach News Journal The first theft was reported on Nov. 19, 2008, after an employee at the Courtyard Marriott Inn on Richard Petty Boulevard noticed the machine was missing from the lobby area, cops said. Then on June 21, another employee from the same motel reported a second ATM missing. Last month, two thieves handily stole the ATM from the Hilton Garden Inn's lobby, 189 Midway Ave. Except this time, video captured the dirty deed. The two suspects are first spotted by the hotel’s surveillance camera at about 4 a.m. that day. One guy lets the other in through an outside hallway door into a stairwell. About an hour later, police believe the same two men — with a clothing change — are back inside. Video shows one milling around the lobby while talking on his cell phone, possibly acting as lookout, while the second comes through a side door with a red dolly. He wheels the machine out of the building within a minute. So, what about the money? More FloriDUH

Ghost busters! Did they really "hear" a ghost?

Sun, 12 Jul 2009 07:00:00 -0500

A trio of West Pasco ghost hunters swear they've connected with a ghost. Whatever. They're Courtney Micalizzi, 20; Sarha Chapman, 21, and Nathan Thomas, 20. They tote tape recorders to places with alleged high paranormal activity. That includes the West Pasco Historical Society, where they recently tried talking with William Barber, a Union soldier whose desk is inside the building. Barber's spirit is supposedly fond of his desk and doesn't like stuff put on it. Museum volunteers say people often smell wafting cigar smoke when they pass by the desk. As they taped, the trio of ghostbusters said they heard a voice answering back in the darkness. The group believes it was Barber's spirit. "I had no choice," the hushed voice says, after Chapman asks how he feels about his desk being in the South, when he fought for the North during the Civil War. The air conditioning system roared to life while the group asked questions, so they retreated to a gazebo. As they left, the voice on the recording said: "Where are you going?" "Come back." They swear the tape is real. Micalizzi works at a bowling alley. Chapman, at Target. Thomas, at 7-Eleven. Better hang on to those day jobs. Photo: Nathan Thomas, 20, shares a recording with former West Pasco Historical Society president Midge London-Prace. [ERIN SULLIVAN | Times