flying kick with love

be by my side

noreply@blogger.com (M) — Sun, 23 Aug 2009 12:05:00 +0000

When you look into the eyes of the person you care for and you see in them so much love for you, it is a moment that can invoke many emotions.

I see them in his eyes when he is observing me quietly. When he speaks to me of his feelings towards me.

I wish he will always be by my side. I wish he will be mine always.

ah, my sweetie pie

noreply@blogger.com (M) — Tue, 04 Aug 2009 15:39:00 +0000

I realise that I've been neglecting this blog as of late because I'm too busy updating the other blog. It's not that I've migrated platforms (I never will - I've been using Blogspot since it became famous after Diaryland) or that I've gotten lazy - it's just that I've been at a loss of ideas. Life has become a bit of a routine and my left nostril's feeling itchy but the sneeze just won't come.

After a long, long wait, Detective Conan Vol. 64 is out! Yay!

On the other side of the spectrum, I think the flu is kicking in. Boooo... does that mean H1N1 for me? It had better not be. The Langkawi trip is coming up next week and God forbid that I be forced to live in solitary confinement, wasting the time away by staring at my toenails until they grow a micrometre.

However, if my situation worsens, I will have to take sick leave tomorrow. The left nostril is a bit 'stuck' as it is, pending sneeze. I can also already feel the phlegm stickying up my throat. I tried singing earlier and the voice isn't coming out as smoothly as it should.

Dammit. I hate getting sick.

back to the usual thing, the RC game

noreply@blogger.com (M) — Sun, 26 Jul 2009 15:03:00 +0000

Hi ho, hi ho, I'm home from Sabah and I'm playing my Restaurant City game. Wow. How pathetic. That was the first thing I did upon coming home actually. Went straight to my room, turned on the laptop and I straight away logged into Facebook to play the game.

I must be damned. Or something.

Noel is still in Singapore. I hope he is enjoying himself and I hope he got some nice things for himself. He doesn't seem to shop at all and spending on himself definitely does not include booze and cigarettes. Such a definition does not exist in my world.

Anyway, I sort of miss him. But not really. I wonder why.

so long, yet so short

noreply@blogger.com (M) — Mon, 20 Jul 2009 16:16:00 +0000

I was reluctant to leave him and immediately upon leaving him, regretted that we had to part ways.

I am depressed as of late.

It's getting harder to wake up in the mornings.

He doesn't like seeing me down and tries his best to encourage me but I'm too tired to think of ways to be cheerful.

I would rather not ride the tide because this tide, it's causing me to feel anxious and agitated. I would, if I had the choice, choose to curl myself into a ball and disappear into oblivion. A better alternative would be to have him hug me tight.

I would rest my cheek on his warm, firm shoulder and inhale the light scent of his perfume and forget about the world.

Can you believe that it's only been three months? We started going out mid-January and only decided to go steady in April. But it feels so, so long owing to the many hours we spend together every day.

All of a sudden, it feels like so many things have happened and that there will be many more to come. We have gone on holiday two months ago. There are two more trips to come and we will be "moving in" together next month.

There are talks of taking the relationship further but that, is still pretty much uncertain. We are waiting to see how it'll go by the end of the year and I hope I'm not being one-sided in this.

Every day, I have a person to fall back on. He is my most special person, you know? He holds my hands and gives me hugs. Whenever he smiles and the corners of his eyes crinkle, I reach out a hand to touch those crinkles. I like resting my cheek on his shoulder.

He'll always catch me, you know. I'm sure of that. He will never let me wander alone. He will always catch up, you know? And I'm certain as certain that he only has eyes for me. I know. I just know because I don't have to worry with him.

But I hope that he will cut down on the cigarettes at least.

an ode to onions

noreply@blogger.com (M) — Fri, 17 Jul 2009 04:02:00 +0000

Maybe you would have known by now that I'm totally addicted to that Playfish game on Facebook - Restaurant City. It's all I ever play these days.

But. But!!!

I am frustrated! I am not getting onions on my first friend visits! Onions are not sold at the ingredient market! And nobody is willing to trade me an onion!

And so, the quest for the elusive onion continues.

my heart is like the raging waves

noreply@blogger.com (M) — Wed, 15 Jul 2009 12:30:00 +0000

Twenty minutes ago: My heart was like the raging waves, dark and angry.

Now: I am simmering beneath the surface and my face is a mask of no emotion. The anger is subsiding and a feeling of tiredness creeps into my being.

I don't know if I should be mad at myself or mad at him for today's 'miscommunication', reminiscent of so many such similar incidents from before. I went home in a huff and I feel like kicking myself so hard that maybe I'd get a seizure and just die. Then I wouldn't have to feel as crappy as I do now.

You know, when it all boils down to the plainness of the situation. I am not giving him enough breathing space to do the things that he likes, like doing stuff with his mates. Although he claims that all his spare time he wants to spend with me, there is no doubt that there must also be a part of him that wants to spend his time with others - and that is why we oftentimes come to a situation where he tries to merge both, I know.

So maybe it's best that I give this matter a bit of thought and maybe it's also best that I spend less time with him now so that it doesn't feel odd on the days that I don't get to see him. So I'll feel less dejected.

We should start reverting back to the old days when we saw each other thrice a week at most. He'd have time for futsal then. Drinks with the boys. Dinner with the colleagues, whom some I detest.

And then I'll go back to being me. The lonely me. The one who does her own shopping and goes out for sushi on her own.

I can't hold him down.

I'm tired. My heart beats with a dull thud.

I don't want to think anymore.

DaiCon 2009: A good flop?

noreply@blogger.com (M) — Mon, 13 Jul 2009 14:37:00 +0000

What makes an event a successful event? Good floor layout? Good sound system? Good attractions? Good crowd? All?

In the case of DaiCon 2009, an ACG (anime, comics and games) event held at MMU Cyberjaya, the only good thing I got to notice in the few hours I was there last Saturday was a better floor layout than what I'd seen at the previous ACG event I had attended which was HELP's C2AGE.

If C2AGE was rated one over five stars, DaiCon's only two.

In other words, not that fantastic.

Which, is a pity considering the kind of hype it had over the event way in advance. They had a snazzy looking website promoting the event and they even managed to rope in a seiyuu all the way from Japan to perform but again, this goes to show that things can always go wrong if you've failed to nail down the itty-bitty details.

Like Point Numero Uno: I was told that there was going to be a maid cafe. I'm no otaku by far but I thought it'd be something different to be served coffee and cake by girls in maid uniform and had looked forward to it. So I saw all these maids, right? And I had no idea if they were just random maid cosplayers or the ones who were supposed to work the cafe but I didn't see any cafe.

I did though, see the Nescafe truck and there was this Indian uncle OK, and he was serving people free instant coffee in the little paper cups. And not to be racist or anything (the point's not about the uncle to begin with) but I actually wondered if the organisers had gotten the idea of a cafe all wrong and decided that coffee was best served in paper cups, the instant way, and from a small booth set up next to a truck. I nearly asked the uncle, "Uncle, mana itu costume maid uncle?" but I decided that I had better not risk my free cup of coffee since I really wanted a drink.

Point Numero... uh, Duo?: Only questions submitted to the DaiCon committee AND that were approved will be asked during Minori Chihara's Q and A session. Said, a media friend who received an e-mail notifying the ruling two days prior to the event. The last minute-ness of the whole thing was because the committee had forgotten to notify the media much earlier.

Said media friend also decided to screw the whole thing altogether after getting so bored, going round and round the hall for a few times and realising that the attractions only amounted to a few booths selling artwork, a few booths selling shirts and other things, a makeup booth whose products you can find in Guardian and Watson's, a few booths displaying figurines and a bunch of cosplayers whose costumes were all right but not too fantastic.

A seiyuu comes all the way from Japan and the media were not granted exclusive one-on-one interviews but forced to sit in on the Q and A session with the rest of the paying fans. This was a far cry from previous interviews had with two other seiyuus who had made appearances at previous years' ACG events, namely Mr Tuxedo Mask and the guy who voices Ichigo Kurosaki.

Ah, let's screw it. The said media person is me. I had a one-on-one with Mr Tuxedo Mask, which was fantastic because although most reporters will tend to ask similar questions, at least they are able to write about their individual experiences or get a few questions asked differently (if lucky). Even when I was unable to attend last year's event that had Ichigo, thanks to the local PR team for Animax which is Roots, was still able to get a one-to-one phone interview with said seiyuu.

Because, your boss will not like it if you wrote the same stuff the other media wrote. In fact, my boss will tell me, since the other paper has the shit, let's just scrap it or yay, let's just rely on Bernama (but that's usually for news stuff).

Anyway, I'm rambling but why do people need to pay to see Chihara, whom some people (who spoke to me at the event) have labeled a "manufactured idol"? Why can't it be an attraction for all? To me, it seems like discrimination on the organisers part and a bit of a ripoff. I say, a ripoff because she is supposed to be a major crowd-pulling factor and yet, you are denying the crowd a reason to remain at the event longer than necessary (since the attractions got boring after a while).

The conclusion is, it's not an entirely bad event (although some of the karaoke contestants were scary and there was this mysterious long line for people to buy I don't know what). I was told that due to certain "political rifts" within the organising committee and the ACG club, a lot of things managed to get botched up and ended up the way they had.

However, a lesson to be learnt is this: Having a big name at your event (like with C2AGE and its Hannah Tan) does not necessarily guarantee it a success. It draws in some crowds and keeps some visitors happy (like the pervs, don't we know?) but if it has the visitors coming home and saying that this sucked and that sucked, you know that your event definitely needs a lot more improving.

my mom's a bitch

noreply@blogger.com (M) — Thu, 09 Jul 2009 12:58:00 +0000

My mom's a bitch. She is a bitter old woman who has nothing going for her in her life except to spend her days watching pointless Korean soaps. One day, I shall ship her off to an onsen resort in Japan and let her have her fun there and she shall no longer bother me you hear, she SHALL NO LONGER BOTHER ME.

In the meantime, if I get married to an Indian guy, he'd better get over his disappointment that I will not be making him homemade chapatti and dhal curry. All I'm going to do is to fry nuggets and that's that.

wedding bells are screaming

noreply@blogger.com (M) — Tue, 07 Jul 2009 06:01:00 +0000

I told my friends to never ever broach the subject of attending somebody's wedding reception to me unless there's a personal invitation with my name on it.

And then I got one from a former schoolmate - but via Facebook. Does that count as a personal invitation (the message did not list other recipients)?

On top of that, another friend just asked for my address so he could mail me an invite.

Oh, doobie-doo.

Everyone is so getting married.

And I am so going to be like Samantha from Sex and the City.

there is only you and i tonight

noreply@blogger.com (M) — Thu, 02 Jul 2009 07:45:00 +0000

We ran in the breeze, two spirits as free as the earth and as whimsical as butterflies. Then, we came to an abrupt halt, pausing to catch our breaths as we laughed in between gasps of air.

We lay down on the soft grass, the scent of musty earth permeating our sense of smell. You heaved your body next to mine. I observed the gentle rise and fall of your chest and I watched your pretty lashes as they gently brushed the top of your cheeks.

I reached one hand up to caress your hair, tousled in the wind. You brought your face close to mine and dropped light kisses all over my forehead, my cheeks, my nose and my lips.

I smiled and you smiled back.

In my heart, all I felt at that moment was joyful bliss.

You kissed me again, on my mouth this time, and we were the only two people in the world that night.

here we go

noreply@blogger.com (M) — Thu, 02 Jul 2009 05:05:00 +0000

I am chewing on cola gummy worms.

Chew. chew. chew. Swallow. Smack lips. Repeat.

You can tell that I'm damn bored. And damned to experience boredom in the office for the rest of the day.

Still plenty of gummy worms to keep me going.

Not forgetting the colourful gummy bears.

Oooh yeah. I'd rather masturbate for fun but I've got rashes on my privates (I hate sanitary pad rashes) and the skin's all dry and painful, chafing in my cotton-lycra panties in my denims. Woohoo!

super furry people

noreply@blogger.com (M) — Tue, 30 Jun 2009 06:34:00 +0000

Super Furry Person = Noel Achariam.
The Lorong Avenger = Noel Achariam.
The Butt Flaunter = Noel Achariam.
Agent Mastorbator (note: not a typo) = Noel Achariam.

Please Google Noel Achariam.

i will cherish you always

noreply@blogger.com (M) — Sun, 28 Jun 2009 16:36:00 +0000

You didn't know, that when you were holding me close with my cheek pressed against your chest, I was smiling. Because I was happy. Because you told me so many special things. Special things I take to be true because I know you to be a sincere person.

You will always be my most special person, Noel, because you are always so kind to me.

I used to cry alone at night, hoping that there will be someone who will be kind to me, that there will be someone to hold my hand tightly because it aches when I cry.

I still cry sometimes but only because I am touched by the many things you do for me.

I am so fortunate for your presence in my life.

You are my greatest gift.

yoo hoo

noreply@blogger.com (M) — Sat, 27 Jun 2009 17:57:00 +0000

You know me, the only movie I could be bothered about watching is Harry Potter but since Noel, I've been watching movies for quite a bit. We've still yet to watch Transformers - we have a pair of free tickets but it would seem that the cinemas are clean booked every day - and on Monday, we're watching the premier of Ice Age 3, courtesy of my friend Lawrence, who is generous to always offer me a pair of free tickets whenever he has some to spare.

And. I'm busy finding and trading ingredients on Restaurant City but it's so hard! Dammit. I only managed to reach Level 7 for my dessert.

how i spend my days

noreply@blogger.com (M) — Sat, 27 Jun 2009 03:26:00 +0000

At least four hours in a day is spent with Noel. Horrors! It's as if I don't have anybody else to hang out with anymore, which isn't entirely untrue...

But I like being with Noel. Noel is dependable, although not so in the timing department. (Punctuality isn't his best trait.)

And today, because it's Saturday, I get to read my comics online and drink cold Ribena. Yay! At the office I drink hot green tea, wrap myself up in my furry brown blanket and try to finish up my work as fast as I can so I can get lost - in the arms of Noel that is.

Arghghghghghghgg. Everything is always about Noel.

Now I gotta go do my homework. I'm helping Noel with his listings.

i'm a sushi roll

noreply@blogger.com (M) — Mon, 22 Jun 2009 15:15:00 +0000

It saddens me when people speak ill of me to Noel because that means that I've yet to succeed in becoming the kind of girlfriend he can be proud of, the one that people will point to and say, "Hey, that's Noel's girl and he sure is lucky to have her".

five minutes with... edition cheng

noreply@blogger.com (M) — Sun, 21 Jun 2009 07:17:00 +0000

THE sky is the limit - a motto notorious Hong Kong actor/singer/host/busboy/playboy/gigolo-turned-pornstar Edition Cheng has always lived by religiously ever since his first accidental stumble into the limelight, posing as a model for the Taiwanese hairgel brand "Hard-On Wax Lover".

"Other days, my motto is 'a man is limited to how deep he can thrust'," said Cheng sheepishly, displaying his signature boyish grin.

Cheng, who had specially flown in to Malaysia on Saturday was speaking to Surat Melayu in an exclusive interview at the official launch of his clothing boutique in Bangsar, 'flooze'.

Cheng, who has a large following in the country, mostly made up of teenage girls (and some boys), was seen dodging flying panties that were flung into his direction from all areas from screaming fans.

"This is odd. The panties are wet," he said, fingering the crotch of a pair of pink satin panties.

Surat Melayu: What is flooze and what was the original idea behind the name?
Cheng: flooze is something that is very close to my heart. When I started becoming a big household name in Hong Kong, I had plenty of that, floozies that is. I was young and with my good looks, the media labeled me a playboy but after that incident, when my ex-girlfriend Messy K revealed that I had been secretly working as a gigolo and acting in porn movies to supplement my extravagant lifestyle, that totally gave me a wake up call. I realised that the biggest floozy was me but man, I remember Messy's furry beaver - it was so thick it could choke you.

SM: Err... can we move on to the next question? Tell us more about flooze's "Exploding Beaver Metallica" line?
Cheng: When you get your fingers entangled into a furry beaver - (remaining parts of the conversation are censored to protect our young readers). I really love Metallica. It's totally raw. It's like Britney's mom screaming and throwing raw potatoes at you. Really raw. RAWR. So expect to see a lot of silver embellishments on fur. Lots of it. RAWR.

SM: ... we noticed that there was a limited edition line called "Whip Me Up, Pansy Boy!".
Cheng: Yeah! You see this? It's for the ladies to carry around and whip their men when they misbehave in public. Know how female empowerment is all the 'in' thing today? I do read CLEO from time to time you know and being able to wield power boosts a woman's confidence, it makes them feel sexy and men love a confident girl who knows how to have her way. Anyway, all our products undergo rigorous quality testing and they can last a lifetime - just don't whip elephants with them or they won't last as much - and the other day, I got my product manager to test it out on me at our brand presentation and woohoo, I was prancing around like a pony! GODDAMN that woman can spank! If you can afford it, buy the "18k Bitch Devil Whip" - that's our best product. It comes free with a bottle of tartar sauce.

SM: What other plans are you currently working on? We hear you're working on a new movie.
Cheng: Oh, you gotta love this. I'm currently producing and co-writing a movie called Edition Cheng: Full-Frontal Inspector. It's a dramatic-erotic thriller about a straight-laced police inspector that infiltrates the underground prostitution syndicate in Hong Kong that caters to those with money to throw and a love for the exotic 'delicacies'. There's a lot of hardships in store for our title hero, that's me by the way, as he navigates his way through unknown territory and comes face-to-face with a number of steamy, full-frontal confrontations.

getting educated by the educationist

noreply@blogger.com (M) — Sun, 21 Jun 2009 05:42:00 +0000

Because I am younger than you, I may not have the wisdom and the experience that you surely must have that are far greater than what I own.

Because I am younger than you, I will depend on you to advise me in however way you see fit even had I not approached you to seek your views on things.

Because I am younger than you, I will always be like a child running to you for hugs and consolations for bruised egos and scraped knees.

Because I am younger than you and shorter than you, I will look up into your eyes with as much love a person can have in her heart and tell you that I love you.

a little bit of contemplation

noreply@blogger.com (M) — Sat, 20 Jun 2009 08:02:00 +0000

Don't tell me how I know but a person can't be ignorant forever. There are means of acquiring the proper 'channels' to find out what is said about you behind your back and most certainly, if you wanted to keep something secret from the entire world the only foolproof way of doing that is to just shoot yourself dead.

Plenty of things I found, I found out too late. I also found out through the hard way that by the time I knew, too much damage had been done. And that they were irreversible.

Sometimes the 'victim' in me lashes out by seeking out the reasons as to how I could have ended up in a lot of shit. Why are people so cruel to me?

The best thing is always to try my best to shrug it off and chalk it up as part of my experiences in growing up. The most important thing though, is to learn from that.

Unfortunately, sometimes I don't and history has an uncanny way of repeating itself and it has, in a few occasions.

Right now though, all of that are behind me.

That was after a really bad second experience totally woke me up for good from the lies that I was living in (after the first bad experience, I went into denial and at some point convinced myself that it was a mistake that wasn't supposed to end up the way it had).

Unfortunately, not everyone is as fortunate.

Like the girl who always knew what a cheat her boyfriend was, still is and will always be. She gets hurt time and time again, writing letters to her boyfriend to voice out her pain, her disappointment that she is finally, "leaving you for good". Yet, she never does leave because he knows all the right things to say and do.

Sometimes it ain't the right move to put your vulnerable heart on a platter and serve it to a manipulating person - gives them even more of an ammunition to break your heart apart.

I still wish that she will wake up from this 'sleepwalking' soon. Same as the many others, who are being cheated.

I used to be in their position. I am thankful that I am no longer there.

getting domesticated

noreply@blogger.com (M) — Sat, 20 Jun 2009 03:14:00 +0000

Have I cooked for any of the other guys I've dated? Not really. I only made spaghetti and cheese omelette for the first guy because we were studying away from home and occasionally I wanted to eat something that tasted like it came from home - no matter how tasty food at the restaurants are, they just have that quality of taste that I call the 'restaurant food taste'. Maybe it's the seasoning that they use.

So it's a bit strange that suddenly I want to cook and make things for Noel. Last week I had him and Nadirah over for a lunch of Japanese curry rice and potato croquettes. I plan to make him homemade beef burger patties next. I'm also planning to get my mom to teach me how to make a few other things.

I even have a plan: Make the stuff on my off days, pop them in the freezer and then get them all fried, baked or whatever when I want to make a lunch delivery for Noel.

I wanted to make Japanese curry rice again yesterday but since I woke up late I thought it'd be nice to get sushi for Noel (the other reason being I wanted to have sushi for lunch) instead.

Besides yummy, I'm also thinking nutritious. I don't know about you but on my part, it is so not healthy to always have fish and chips with fried rice, a bulls-eye egg and a large helping of mayo every day for lunch and then some other greasy variety of rice and stuff at night. And there's hardly any veggie or fruit in my diet - no wonder I'm always constipated.

And so, I shall find a bottle of Pride balsamic and lemon salad dressing and also deliver salad to Noel's office! Maybe some fruit too.

Gosh. I'm getting sooo domesticated. Worse, I'm also developing my talents as a masseuse girl. Dammit it's all Noel's fault.

yay me!!

noreply@blogger.com (M) — Fri, 19 Jun 2009 07:35:00 +0000

I must surely be the most nicest girlfriend on the planet. I got up, rushed to my favourite restaurant and made a sushi lunch delivery to Noel's office where we proceeded to eat half of the stuff bought before we got too full to eat anymore.

And it's my off day!

So I am sweet, Noel says and I know he loves me very, very much and that is why we are going to drop in on the International Cat Show and the National Rabbit Show soon because he loves me very, very much.

BUNNYYYY!!!!

twoot twoot

noreply@blogger.com (M) — Wed, 17 Jun 2009 12:00:00 +0000

A little cactus plant appeared on my table today, courtesy of the Bayer people.

I'm going to give it to my mom - and I think it has about as much chance as a tadpole living in a jar of vinegar. My mom's great with cactuses that way.

I also have a box of chocolate-chip-cookies-in-a-cup-with-cheese-cake-toppings which Nadirah baked last night - at a price OK. We shall not be in the habit of mooching off of our friends just because they're expert bakers.

So all in all, I am pleased but I still hope to see my Noel tonight.

i am loved

noreply@blogger.com (M) — Mon, 15 Jun 2009 15:51:00 +0000

The unexpected journey with you began when you approached me that night at DV8 and introduced yourself to me.

You will always be loved with much fierceness and much passion.

I love you Noel.

this is hard

noreply@blogger.com (M) — Sun, 14 Jun 2009 13:42:00 +0000

This is hard. I've tried to write this at least four times but I can't seem to put down the words that usually come to me so easily.

Beginilah. Saya akan menghantar e-mel kepada anda.

miow miow

noreply@blogger.com (M) — Fri, 12 Jun 2009 06:18:00 +0000

I've been a bad, bad girl and so, I am regularly punished for being bad. :(

Noel says I need to be educated regularly so I am currently undergoing 'special' classes thrice a week. It involves a lot of eating and occasionally a lick of the popsicle.

Miow.