FORGING IRON-Grace Truth and Time

In the End

noreply@blogger.com (Anonymous) — Sat, 3 Mar 2012 15:31:00 -0800

In the end.

We all go.

In the end.

Do I know?

In the end.

I do not move.

In the end.

Will he approve?

In the end.

My heartbeat ends.

In the end.

Is he a friend?

In the end.

I fail no more.

In the end.

Futile heretofore?

In the end.

It will close.

In the end.

Last adios?

THE PLANS

noreply@blogger.com (Anonymous) — Wed, 1 Feb 2012 11:53:00 -0800

The words jump off the page:

"For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

What plans? I sit in the midst of a dark hour wondering what plans he has for me? The preacher assures me that his plans are to prosper and not to harm. I still wonder. What are his plans?

I walk out of the preacher's house and the world hits hard. What are his plans?

I see suffering in the street as the beggar sits on the corner with his cup.

What plans?

I see it all around?

Where is the preacher? Where is the plan?

The plan is you! Your journey is designed for you. His plan is not altered by what you see or what you hear. His plan is only altered when we decline the invitation--

All is grace

The inches we need are all around us.

noreply@blogger.com (Anonymous) — Wed, 25 Jan 2012 20:33:00 -0800

Any Given Sunday – Al Pacino-

I made every mistake a middle aged man could make. . .I can’t even stand the face I see.

When you get old in life, things get taken from you, That’s part of life

But you only learn that when you start losing stuff

You find out life is a game of inches. . .the margin of error is so small. One half a step too late or too early you don’t make it. The inches we need are all around us.

We fight for that inch, we claw for that inch.

Because we know that when we add up all those inches

That is the difference between winning and loosing.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Yes we fail, and yes, I have made every mistake a middle -aged man could make. I have learned that life is a game of inches.

Go fight for your inch.

The Inspiration of Anthony Robles-

noreply@blogger.com (Anonymous) — Sun, 4 Dec 2011 11:20:00 -0800

Dance Me To The End Of Love

noreply@blogger.com (Anonymous) — Sat, 3 Dec 2011 22:05:00 -0800

Going Back To The Start

noreply@blogger.com (Anonymous) — Sat, 19 Nov 2011 14:31:00 -0800

Turing around and looking back.
I see the remnants of my past as it burns in the distance.
The smoke is visible.
A valuable reminder that as I live for a second time---going back to the start is not an option.
I begin anew with the end of myself.

Finding a Why

noreply@blogger.com (Anonymous) — Sun, 18 Sep 2011 23:21:00 -0700

Those who have a ‘why’ to live, can bear with almost any ‘how”

(Victor Frankl quoting Friedich Nietzche.)

The news of our future seems dark and bleak. The news of our day is difficult to digest as the “experts” all predict doom. Where do we get the energy to traipse through the waist deep mud of life that sticks to our shoes and makes the trek harder and harder as we fight to ‘get through each day.’?

The reality is that this uncomfortable state of ‘angst” is a precondition to us becoming fully human. Becoming fully human is a project that never ends and is not a goal to be achieved. We should view our first order as “existing in this world” and not try to think of ourselves as being apart from the world into which we are thrown.

Our “why” is not found in escaping the angst but fully engaging in the experience allowing the circumstances of life to shape us, not attempting to escape the pain. We should be less concerned with “who we are” and more concerned with “creating ourselves,” by traversing the human plane of failure, success, pain and joy, victory and defeat.

We can reject the notion of determinism and follow a spiritual way of walking the human path, which inevitably guides us through the journey of becoming fully human. Recognizing that our existence is never fixed conclusively. Rather, if we choose, we can interact in recreating, evolving, transitioning and “becoming.” We are not forced to a labor camp of static living. Accepting defeat or victory as a final resting place.

No God has much more- for those who risk making a choice to engage. Our “why” becomes the goal of “becoming-” sharing our pain, defeat, hopes and dreams in a relational context?

Soulful Spirituality

noreply@blogger.com (Anonymous) — Sat, 17 Sep 2011 17:51:00 -0700
Life is a journey of becoming. In Christian terms we might speak of this as becoming our true self in God, becoming like Christ, or possibly becoming our hidden self-in-Christ. In other spiritual traditions this idea has sometimes been presented in terms of becoming enlightened or becoming one with all that is, while in more psychological language it might be framed as becoming increasingly integrated, becoming free, or becoming all we can be. Becoming is an important meeting point of psychology and spirituality. It is an essential characteristic of anything deserving to be called spirituality and is certainly right at the very core of Christian spirituality. It might strike you as odd, however, to speak of this journey as "becoming fully human." Perhaps you have assumed that we are born fully human or, if not, that this is something that simply requires passage of time. As we shall see, neither of these is true. The fulfillment of our humanity never happens automatically, nor does it ever occur apart from certain core spiritual ways of living. However, not all spiritual paths—nor even all expressions of Christian spirituality—lead us in this direction. Even as we acknowledge that spirituality plays an indispensable role in this human developmental journey, we must also recognize that it has the potential to make us less, as well as more, authentically human.

Benner, David G., Psychological Studies Institute, Richmont Graduate University, US

Time

noreply@blogger.com (Anonymous) — Fri, 24 Jun 2011 23:36:00 -0700
We kill time.
We make time.
Time is on our side.
Time is lost.
Time stands still.
Time never ends.
Time is eternal.
It is the end of time
Time for Peace.
Time For War.
Good Times.
Bad Times.

Grace, Truth and Time

noreply@blogger.com (Anonymous) — Fri, 3 Jun 2011 23:50:00 -0700

Grace Truth and Time.

An old man was sitting in the coffee shop slowly sipping his coffee. He had leathery skin and his hands were calloused and scarred. His best years were behind him. I was seated directly in front of him, just a few feet away. I noted that he still had a twinkle in his bright blue eyes, although his old body had failed him. He stared out the window at the cars that passed. He was not in a hurry. I moved to a chair next to him and asked if he wanted to visit. His nonverbal response of a slight nod seemed to give me permission. I noted his calloused hands and asked what he did for a living. He grinned. I asked again and he continued to grin.

“I was a preacher man,” he wryly replied.

I wanted to ask him about his hands as I never knew a preacher that did much hard labor. But I really wanted to know why he still had a twinkle in his eye? Mine had burned out long ago, and I was half his age. So I asked.

“Why do you still have a twinkle in your eye?”

He grinned again and sipped his dark rich coffee. He leaned forward and stared intently at me. He had my attention.

“I was an angry young man and I struggled to trust God. I believe that my success was my fault-not God’s.” He winked. His big blue eye’s dancing.

“One day I had a moral failure and was kicked out of the church. The judgment of the members was swift. I was told that I would never preach again. I was broken and I was angry. I now blamed God for my failure. I left God behind and never looked back, living a hard life.“

I knew the old man’s story all too well.

“One day a young preacher boy knocked on my door,“ the old man said. "He was excited to tell me his story. The young man sat down and we visited for hours. He had no idea I used to be a preacher. He was excited about the ‘gospel,’ and invited me to church. I declined. The young man persisted. And finally I agreed to go to his church.”

I continued to listen.

“I sat in the back row and the young man bellowed the gospel. I have never been the same. You see he told me that God had grace- more than just forgiveness, it was unmerited favor and it was brought to me and could not be created or produced by me. The young preacher man also stated that I should see myself in relation to God’s truth. Not man’s truth. God saw me as redeemed and forgiven-not forever condemned. Finally, the young preacher man told me that God never intended us to experience time as something that passes us by. But beginning with the fall of man, God put us into a world of time- the passing of events, people are born, grow up experience loves joys, losses and pain. Yet time is not a punishment for us. God did not take us out of eternity because he was mad at us. No, he knew we needed enough space to be repaired, healed and forgiven, and matured. He created time to be that space.”

“I got it,” I exclaimed

“Perhaps you do," the old preacher man said. "Maybe you understand grace and truth. But I can assure you that you still have time to contend with.”

I was puzzled. The old man’s blue eyes were now at full bloom.

“Yes you can get grace daily and God’s truth helped me grow, but you must remember that you will never run out of space to be repaired and healed. Just keep searching and trying-crawl if you must. You will be repaired”

He picked up his eyeglasses and nodded his head goodbye.

“Grace, truth and time my boy-grace truth and time.”

It's time to move on from Lance Armstrong allegations

noreply@blogger.com (Anonymous) — Sun, 29 May 2011 17:27:00 -0700
It's time to move on from Lance Armstrong allegations

Leave the law out of the Lance Armstrong allegations - The Washington Post

noreply@blogger.com (Anonymous) — Sun, 29 May 2011 16:33:00 -0700
And the beat goes on . . . perhaps we now live in an alternative universe where the logic of the illogic becomes the norm

Leave the law out of the Lance Armstrong allegations - The Washington Post

Building Strong Children and the Impact of Michael Vick

noreply@blogger.com (Anonymous) — Wed, 25 May 2011 23:27:00 -0700
"It is easier to build strong children than to repair broken men."
— Frederick Douglass

Michael Vick was an icon. He then went to prison. After serving 18 month in prison on dogfighting and conspiracy charges, Vick appears to be back in the game. But off the field, he will have a bigger impact. Impacting young children who need a hero that can no longer fly.

A young man like Tyrone, a 7th grader who sits is class, hoping someday he can escape the poverty that envelops him. His father is in prison and his mother struggles to make ends meet. Tyrone wants out. The men who surround him are broken, burned out and refusing to buy in to the mantra that it will all be better someday. Someday seems so far away.

Tyrone looks to his left, the old man turns away. He turns to his right to face the chaos of the world-the run down house, the overrun neighborhood and the relentless barking of a stray dog. Tyrone wanders into his run down house and riffles through his closet. Hanging neatly on a strong hanger is the jersey of Michael Vick. He sees hope in the form of a number- the number 7. He has never met Michal Vick, but he has witnessed the comeback of Michael. Tyrone watched as his hero pulled himself up from the ashes of defeat to walk again.

Tyrone is not affected by what others think of Michael. It would be easy for Tyrone to choose a hero that still has his cape, a hero that does not have a past. But Tyrone chose Michael, one he can identify with and one that can identify with him. Tyrone determines to break the grip of poverty and crime. The odds are against him, but he will make it out. He rubs the number 7 jersey and pulls out his books and begins to read. Tyrone is disciplined. Michael has done his job and he is not even aware of the impact.

As the media types scream stats and worship their chosen anointed, Michael quietly builds his legacy from miles away. Yes, Michael Vick is helping to build strong children- as he knows personally that it is harder to repair broken men.

The Fear of Failure

noreply@blogger.com (Anonymous) — Wed, 4 May 2011 00:03:00 -0700
The Fear of Failure

I've missed more than 9000 shots in my career.
I've lost almost 300 games. 26 times,
I've been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed.
I've failed over and over and over again in my life.
And that is why I succeed.

Michael Jordan

It has been said that the fear of failure is worse that failure itself. It is natural for us to want to succeed-to be famous-to be rich-to be happy. The allure of such pursuits is a double edge sword and creates a fear that what we so desire, may never happen. In the end, we give up, stop trying or quit when failure interrupts our dream. However, the heat of failure can forge you into something stronger.

My dream's were interrupted when I went to prison. I had all the trappings of success-money, a good job, and respect. I fell hard and in the valley of darkness, I had no desire to live. I wanted to quit. I certainly would never dare to dream again. That would be too bold-right? A man who had been to prison and lost it all-reputation, money and friends, could never dare to dream-that would be too risky.

I dared to dream. On January 13, 2009, as I sat in that cold dark half-way house in the belly of the tenderloin in San Francisco, California I dared to believe that my life had meaning and purpose. In one hour, I would find freedom. My prison experience would be over and I would journey on to the next phase. I dared to smile knowing that that this journey was my journey, and the right journey for me. The heat of failure was shaping me like the heat of dad's hot forge was used to shape the iron of a horseshoe. The valley of prison pounded me like dad's hammer pounded the hot iron into a round well-fitted shoe.

Two years later, I was taking another shot, hoping I would not miss. I had been invited to speak at Character Combine. An outreach to coaches and athletes created by a wonderful man named Jason Harper. Harper without hesitation had asked me to participate. I was worried. I was sharing the stage with reputable and famous men of character such as MLB manager Jerry Manuel and UFC fighter Mark Munoz. I feared that I would fail. What would I say to kids and coaches? I had failed; I had been to prison-why did that matter? My character was flawed. My name was called and I slowly walked up the stairs and onto the stage. When it ended, I walked off stage and out the back.

Trenton, my son ran up to me and gave me a hug. "Great job dad. I love you" "I love you too son." I responded. I gave him a hug. That's all I needed. I am not sure if I had done all that great, but it did not matter. I had taken a shot and risked the loss- the one man I needed to reach, my son, was standing before me a few feet away. I call that success.

God and Cigars

noreply@blogger.com (Anonymous) — Sun, 1 May 2011 22:10:00 -0700

God and Cigars:
An Argument Against Regulating Church Based Counseling

            Well, dear friends, you know that some men can do to the glory of God what to other men would be sin. And, notwithstanding what brother Pentecost has said, I intend to smoke a good cigar to the glory of God before I go to bed tonight. If anybody can show me in the     Bible the command, "Thou shalt not smoke," I am ready to keep it; but I haven't found it yet. I find Ten Commandments, and it's as much as I can do to keep them; and I've no       desire to make them into eleven or twelve.

Charles Spurgeon, a well-known cigar smoker.
            Not unlike, Charles Spurgeon, the freedom to be unencumbered by rules is at the heart of the debate between the states desire to regulate "church based counseling services."[1] Ever since apostolic times, counseling has occurred in the church as a natural function of corporate spiritual life. After all, the New Testament itself commands believers to “admonish one another” (Rom.15:14); “encourage one another” (Heb. 3:13, KJV); “comfort one another with these words” (1 Thess.4:18); “encourage one another, and build up one another” (1 Thess. 5:11); and “confess your sins to one another, and pray for one another, so that you may be healed” (James 5:1). (MacArthur, 2005)
            Church based counselors are normally not a licensed or state regulated profession in contrast to a Marriage and Family Therapist, Licensed Clinical Social Worker or licensed Psychologist. While some states have regulated the practice of therapy and professional counseling -- in the clinical and health care senses of it -- they have largely stayed away from overseeing church based counseling[2].
            The question that remains: Should states be allowed to regulate and license Christian based counseling services? While one may argue for regulation, church based counselors do not need an eleventh commandment to follow. First, regulation is contrary to our First Amendment Freedom of Religion. Second, any regulation is contrary to the First Amendment doctrine providing for Separation of Church and State. Third, any regulation will certainly undermine or attempt to alter the foundational belief system underlying Christian based counseling. Finally, in California, courts have held that "religious counselors" are not held to the same standard of care applicable to licensed professional counselors.
Religious Freedom
            The First amendment of the Constitution embodies two religious rights. The two religion clauses of the First Amendment are set fort in the Bill of Rights:
            Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the      free exercise thereof . . . nor shall any State … deny to any person within its jurisdiction the equal protection of the laws.

            Religious freedom is not only protected by the Constitution, but it's a foundational principle espoused by our founding fathers. (Cogan, Neil H., ed. (1997). That's why most states have avoided any legislation or regulation of Christian counseling. So long as counseling is “religious” and performed in association with a Christian church or organization, the state does not see it as subject to regulations on clinical counseling.[3]  
Separation of Church and State
            The Christian counseling practice cannot be regulated by the state as it violates the
Doctrine of Separation of Church and State. The First Amendment is the genesis of such a doctrine and provides in part that:
            Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion. . .

            There is a fundamental difference between the creeds of clinical psychotherapy and Christianity. The pastoral or church counselors primarily provide guidance through scripture and faith and cannot be defined as clinical. The primary difference is that psychotherapy in essence teaches that man heals man and man heals himself, while Christianity teaches that Christ ultimately heals man. In short, for Christians, the source is God, and for psychotherapists, the source is man. Admittedly, there are other doctrinal differences between psychotherapy and Christianity; however, the source of healing is generally recognized as the most significant difference. (Tan Siang-Yang, 2011) (Mowrer, O., 1961) (Adams, J., 1986).
            This difference is significant within the arena of mental health because the “state” – as defined in this paper as the political and legislative bodies and/or boards overseeing behavioral/mental health in America – has accepted the secular systems of belief held by psychotherapy and its various humanistic orientations. Consequently, the state that has adopted a system of beliefs held by psychotherapists cannot also agree with and take jurisdiction over the system of beliefs held by Christian counselors.
            In short, the state cannot have it both ways. If the state agrees with a secular belief system as it pertains to counseling, it cannot at the same time agree with and support a belief system rooted in God.
            Thus, the state should not impose jurisdiction and licensure restrictions over the field of Christian counseling because of the inherent ideological difference in psychotherapy and Christian counseling. Doing so would in essence replace the belief system of the church and "establish" the belief system of the state and violate the Establishment Clause of the United States Constitution. The Church should instead regulate the field of Christian counseling. In fact, the American Association of Christian Counselors has established a code of ethics that established guidelines for dual relationships, informed consent, client confidentiality and advertising to name a few. (AAAC, 2004). Moreover, a biblical counselor is most likely subject to the provision of the California Penal Code section 11164-11174.4-the child abuse mandated reporting act. (Jensen, D. JD., 2008). Therefore, one cannot argue that failing to regulate will lead to the potential for unreported sexual abuse victims.
            Differing Foundational Belief Systems
            Some believe that psychotherapy is essentially a science and that it has been validated by science. However, as I understand, psychotherapeutic orientations are rooted in a “system of beliefs," just as Christianity is rooted in a system of beliefs. Examples of these psychotherapeutic systems of belief are Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, Client Centered Therapy, and Psychoanalytic Therapy. Each system provides a theory, or explanation, for how a person achieves and maintains mental health. Although science attempts to inform these theories, psychologists admit that science is not equipped to validate or invalidate the systems of belief proposed by any psychotherapeutic orientation. Similarly, science is not equipped to validate or invalidate the system of beliefs held by Christians.
            It remains a common misconception that psychotherapy has been validated by science, whereas Christianity is based primarily in belief. The truth is that both are systems of belief and these systems are fundamentally at odds with each other.  These systems are primarily at odds with each other because of their ideological differences regarding the source of man’s healing.
            Psychotherapy professes that man heals, and is therefore considered secular.
Psychotherapy does not rely upon or acknowledge God as a healing source within the context of counseling. Rather, psychotherapy is defined by secular psychology, has its origins in secular Freudian psychoanalysis, and is currently secular in practice.
            Christian counseling, conversely, proclaims that God heals. Its orientation is based in the teachings of the Bible and a belief in the intervention of the Holy Spirit as a healing source. Christian counselors and clients believe that life’s problems, ranging from depression, to marital problems, to anxiety, to crises of faith, deserve at the very least spiritual attention and at the most a spiritual cure.
            As set forth above, most if not all governing bodies have a secular bent. If states were allowed to regulate Christian counselors, the underlying fundamental philosophy that God heals man would necessarily be changed.
Standard of Care
            Religious counselors are not held to the same standard of care applicable to a licensed professional counselor. In the case of Jacqueline R. v. Household of Faith Family Church, Inc. (2002) 97 Cal.App.4th 198, 118 Cal.Rptr.2d 264, the Fourth Appellate District upheld the trial court's granting of a motion for summary judgment on behalf of the defendant Church where a married couple had sued a pastor in the church to whom the husband had gone for marriage counseling. The pastor was alleged to have engaged in sexual conduct with the wife. Plaintiffs unsuccessfully argued that the Church counselor should be held to the same tort liability imposed on licensed marriage counselors.
Nally v. Grace Community Church.
            The issue of the dependence on paraprofessionals for the provision of psychological counseling was presented in Nally v. Grace Community Church (1988) 47 Cal.3d 278 [763 P.2d 948; 253 Cal.Rptr. 97. The Nally case addressed to what extent pastoral counselors, who have received no professional training in psychological counseling and locate their therapeutic approaches in religious precepts, can be held to a "secular standard of care." At the heart of the Church's and pastors' defense in this case was their claim that the suit against them necessarily implicated the First Amendment's Free Exercise and Establishment Clauses.
            As a college student, and already experiencing emotional difficulties, Ken Nally left the Roman Catholic Church in which he had been raised and joined the independent, fundamentalist Grace Community Church in 1974. Grace, with some 20,000 members, was then the "largest Protestant church in Los Angeles County" A significant part of Grace's ministry-"perhaps the most important aspect of [its] services" was the church's pastoral counseling program, which was directed by biblical principles, in particular the belief that unresolved sin lay at the base of psychological problems. In 1978, suffering from continuing depression, Ken Nally engaged in formal and informal counseling with three of Grace's biblical counselors. Nally's emotional state continued to deteriorate and, in February 1979, his mother took him to a psychiatrist who prescribed an antidepressant medication. The next month, Ken attempted suicide by taking an overdose of the antidepressant and was hospitalized. Although the counselors from Grace Church were aware that this was not Nally's first suicide attempt and although he told them, during his hospitalization, that he was determined to succeed in a future attempt, they did not share this information with his parents, physicians, or the hospital staff. Nally's parents did not support having their son involuntarily committed and Ken was released from the hospital.
            About a week later, Nally used a shotgun to take his own life.   Walter Nally, Ken's father, viewed the church as a "cult." He learned more about the role of Grace Community Church in his late son's life and the nature of the counseling Ken received. Walter believed that Grace's pastoral counselors were the cause of Ken's suicide.
            In 1980 Ken and his wife, brought suit against the church, its pastor, and three pastoral counselors, claiming clergy malpractice, negligence, and outrageous conduct, and seeking one million dollars in damages. Grace Church's attorneys countered the claims with defenses based on the First Amendment, the Nallys' own negligence toward Ken, and the Nallys' failure to establish a legal cause of action.  After the original trial court judge dismissed the case for lack of sufficient evidence, the Court of Appeal reversed and ordered the case to go to trial. In Superior Court, after the conclusion of the plaintiffs' arguments, the judge granted the Church's motion for nonsuit. Again, the Court of Appeal reversed. This time, the Church appealed to the California Supreme Court.
            The state high court dismissed the case, ruling that the Church and its pastoral counselors had established no "special relationship" with Ken Nally and thus had no "legal duty" that would render it responsible for his death. Although the decisions of the California intermediate appellate court had the potential of breaking away from the well-trod path of non-interference, the state Supreme Court twice reversed the appellate decisions and the U. S. Supreme Court refused to hear any more appeals when the Nally's challenged the final outcome in the state litigation.
            This is now the law in California. Although the facts of every case are different, it can generally be stated that a church based counselor who receives no professional training in psychological counseling and locate their therapeutic approaches in religious precepts, will not be held to a "secular standard of care."

Conclusion
            The essence of church based counseling is that God is the source of our healing. Regulation by the states will alter this belief and therefore must not be imposed. Like Charles Spurgeon stated so many years ago, he was unwilling to submit to an eleventh commandment, which would alter the foundational belief system of Christianity. Likewise-any attempt by the state to regulate church based counseling service will also alter the foundational philosophy upon which it is based. Therefore, state regulation should be rejected.

[1] The term church based counseling or Christian counselor will be used interchangeably herein, and is intended to refer exclusively to lay counselors and pastoral counseling that is offered within the confines of a church body. Therefore, this author does not argue or support the proposition that states cannot or should not regulate MFT's, LCSW, LPC or licensed psychologist.
[2]Many churches and Christian colleges offer certifications and degrees in Christian pastoral counseling -- however, there are no state requirements for these programs nor are there any licenses or restrictions on graduates' ability to counsel under the auspices of their religious organizations.

[3] Pastoral or Christian counselors as defined above must be careful about how they represent themselves. People seeing them must have a clear understanding that they are receiving spiritual guidance based on religious principles and not clinical counseling. If a Christian counselor misrepresents herself, she can be in violation of law for practicing clinical counseling without a license.   