ForwadedJoke.com Jokes and Humor Feed http://www.forwardedjoke.comJokes on every area of our life, sex jokes, religion jokes, blond jokes, funny video clips and anything to put a smile on your face.enSat, 13 Mar 2010 11:04:38 PSThttp://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.2hourly1ForwardedJokehttp://feedburner.google.comAdvantages of Being a Womanhttp://feedproxy.google.com/~r/ForwardedJoke/~3/hDB2737xOrU/Jokesadvantages of being a womancomedyfunnygenderhumorjokelistSex JokeswomenJoker3Sat, 13 Mar 2010 11:04:38 PSThttp://www.forwardedjoke.com/?p=1483Why it’s better to be a Woman!

1. We got off the Titanic first.

2. We get to flirt with systems support men who always return our calls, and are nice to us when we blow up our computers.

3. Our boyfriend’s clothes make us look elfin & gorgeous. Guys look like complete idiots in ours.

4. We can be groupies. Male groupies are stalkers.

5. We can cry and get off speeding fines.

6. We’ve never lusted after a cartoon character or the central female figure in a computer game.

7. Taxis stop for us.

8. Men die earlier, so we get to cash in on the life insurance.

9. We don’t look like a frog in a blender when dancing.

10. Free drinks, Free dinners, Free movies … (you get the point).

11. We can hug our friends without wondering if she thinks we’re gay.

12. We can hug our friends without wondering if WE’RE gay.

13. New lipstick gives us a whole new lease on life.

14. It’s possible to live our whole lives without ever taking a group shower.

15. We don’t have to fart to amuse ourselves.

16. If we forget to shave, no one has to know.

17. We can congratulate our team-mate without ever touching her butt.

18. If we have a zit, we know how to conceal it.

19. We never have to reach down every so often to make sure our privates are still there.

20. If we’re dumb, some people will find it cute.

21. We don’t have to memorize Caddyshack or Fletch to fit in.

22. We have the ability to dress ourselves.

23. We can talk to people of the opposite sex without having to picture them naked.

24. If we marry someone 20 years younger, we’re aware that we look like an idiot.

25. Our friends won’t think we’re weird if we ask whether there’s spinach in our teeth.

26. There are times when chocolate really can solve all your problems.

27. We’ll never regret piercing our ears.

28. We can fully assess a person just by looking at their shoes.

29. We know which glass was ours by the lipstick mark.

30. We have enough sense to realize that the easiest way to get out of being lost is to ask for directions.

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]]>Why it’s better to be a Woman! 1. We got off the Titanic first. 2. We get to flirt with systems support men who always return our calls, and are nice to us when we blow up our computers. 3. Our boyfriend’s clothes make us look elfin & gorgeous. Guys look like complete idiots in ours. 4. We can [...]http://www.forwardedjoke.com/2010/03/advantages-of-being-a-woman/feed/0http://www.forwardedjoke.com/2010/03/advantages-of-being-a-woman/10 husbands, still a virginhttp://feedproxy.google.com/~r/ForwardedJoke/~3/R0u9FOjwn-k/Jokes10 husbands still a virginfunnyhumorjokeJoker3Sat, 13 Mar 2010 11:02:52 PSThttp://www.forwardedjoke.com/?p=1480A lawyer married a woman who had previously divorced ten husbands.

On their wedding night, she told her new husband, “Please be gentle, I’m still a virgin.”

“What?” said the puzzled groom.

“How can that be if you’ve been married ten times?”

“Well, Husband #1 was a sales representative: he kept telling me how great it was going to be.

Husband #2 was in software services: he was never really sure how it was supposed to function, but he said he’d look into it and get back to me.

Husband #3 was from field services: he said everything checked out diagnostically but he just couldn’t get the system up.

Husband #4 was in telemarketing: even though he knew he had the order, he didn’t know when he would be able to deliver.

Husband #5 was an engineer: he understood the basic process but wanted three years to research, implement, and design a new state-of-the-art method.

Husband #6 was from finance and administration: he thought he knew how, but he wasn’t sure whether it was his job or not.

Husband #7 was in marketing: although he had a nice product, he was never sure how to position it.

Husband #8 was a psychologist: all he ever did was talk about it.

Husband #9 was a gynecologist: all he did was look at it.

Husband #10 was a stamp collector: all he ever did was… God! I miss him! But now that I’ve married you, I’m really excited!”

“Good,” said the new husband, “but, why?”

“You’re a lawyer. This time I know I’m gonna get screwed!”

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]]>A lawyer married a woman who had previously divorced ten husbands. On their wedding night, she told her new husband, “Please be gentle, I’m still a virgin.” “What?” said the puzzled groom. “How can that be if you’ve been married ten times?” “Well, Husband #1 was a sales representative: he kept telling me how great it was going to [...]http://www.forwardedjoke.com/2010/03/10-husbands-still-a-virgin/feed/0http://www.forwardedjoke.com/2010/03/10-husbands-still-a-virgin/Tom Greenhttp://feedproxy.google.com/~r/ForwardedJoke/~3/nF8f-8M2uMo/Jokescomedyfunnyhumoroldtom greenTVJoker3Tue, 09 Mar 2010 05:49:51 PSThttp://www.forwardedjoke.com/?p=1478

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The day after, one of the husbands called the other and said, angrily:
“Looks like our wifes had quite a good time yesterday. Mine came home without her panties!”.
The other one answered, even more angry: “That’s nothing. Mine came back with a small note sticked to here ass, saying ‘we will never forget you. love, from all the guys”…

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Bill Clinton suddenly picked up Hillary and threw her out on the field.

The secret service man came running up to him and said, “Mr. President Sir, I think you misunderstood me; I said throw out the first pitch.”

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