Foxxfyrre's Honk'n'Holl'r

The Demise of Ol' Blue

2013-03-13T19:38:00.003-07:00

The Demise of Ol' Blue

A young jackaroo from outback Queensland goes off to university, but halfway through the semester he has squandered all of his money.

He calls home.

'Dad,' he says, 'you won't believe what modern education is developing...they actually have a program here in Brisbane that will teach our dog Ol' Blue how to talk.'

'That's amazing!' his Dad says. 'How do I get Ol' Blue in that program?'

'Just send him down here with $2,000,' the young jackaroo says, 'I'll get him in the course.'

So his father sends the dog and $2,000.

About two-thirds through the semester, the money again runs out. The boy calls home.

'So how's Ol' Blue doing, son?' his father wants to know.

'Awesome! Dad, he's talking up a storm... But you just won't believe this. They've had such good results with talking, they've begun to teach the animals how to read.'

'Read?' exclaims his father. 'No kidding! How do we get Ol' Blue in that program?'

'Just send $4,500. I'll get him in the class.'

The money promptly arrives. But our hero has a problem. At the end of the year, his father will find out the dog can neither talk nor read.

So he shoots the dog. When he arrives home at the end of the year, his father is all excited.

'Where's Ol' Blue? I just can't wait to talk with him, and see him read something!'

'Dad,' the boy says, 'I have some grim news. Yesterday morning, just before we left to drive home, Ol' Blue was in the living room, kicked back in the recliner, reading the Wall Street Journal. Then he suddenly turned to me and asked, 'So, is your daddy still bonking that little redhead barmaid at the pub?''

The father groans and whispers, 'I hope you shot that bastard before he talks to your Mother!'

'I sure did, Dad!'

'That's my boy!'

The kid went on to be a successful lawyer.

*****

TTFN

Sunday Stealing: The (20) First (Questions) Meme Foxxfyrre Style

2013-02-24T20:40:00.001-07:00

Welcome to Sunday Stealing

The (20) First (Questions) Meme

Originally hosted by +Bud Weiser, now +Mr Lance has taken the reigns.

This session will be brought to you by my alter egos,

Foxxfyrre, Dursten Shaw’tz, and Velvet Head.

First Job:

Dursten: It was while I was Bartending at the Honk’n’Holl’r. This guy sat down at the bar and asked for 4 tequila shooters.
Velvet Head: Yeah, so?

Dursten: I asked him what he was celebrating, and he said it was because of his first--what did he call it...Oh yeah a Job Blow, so I thought I’d buy him a shooter on the house to congratulate him.
Velvet Head: That’s not a ‘real’ job, and you got it backwards.
Dursten: Oh, but he refused the Tequila shot anyway.
Velvet Head: Why would he refuse?
Dursten: I don’t know, but he said if 4 won’t wash the taste out of his mouth, nothing would.

First Real Job:

Foxxfyrre: Myself and all my alter egos are Italian--need I say more?
Dursten and Velvet Head: Shhhh. That’s a ‘Family’ thing.

First Volunteer Job:

Dursten: I was a site marketer to target the optimum addresses for the girls to get the best cookie sales.
Velvet Head: Really. That's cool, how long did that last?
Dursten: One season.
Velvet Head: Why?
Dursten: I got kicked out of Cubs for eating too many Brownies.

First Car:

Foxxfyrre: That’s easy, a Matchbox race set. It came with 3 cars and an oval slotted track for the cars to race in.
Dursten: No it wasn’t, it was a Hot Wheels Set you got for Christmas in 1968. It was the first one that came with a loop and a jump that the cars could go through. It even had a vice clamp so you could clamp the track on anything that was elevated for the cars to start from.
Velvet Head: You are both wrong, it was a Johnny Express flat deck 18-wheeler that was a tethered remote control vehicle. Dad got it for us for Christmas in 1965. Don’t you remember guys--you could stand on the flat deck and still drive it with the remote for it was that durable.

Foxxfyrre: Oh yeah, I remember now. I think we finally got to play with it in the summer of 74, because Dad wouldn’t let it go.

First Record:

Foxxfyrre: Five feet six inches in the High Jump during the Provincial Track meet in Grade Seven.

First Sport Played:

Foxxfyrre: See above.

Velvet Head: Above what?

Foxxfyrre: I mean see previous question.

Velvet Head: I had no previous question.

Foxxfyrre: I mean the question above this one.

Velvet Head: That's what I asked.

Foxxfyrre: I give up.

Velvet Head: Touchy, touchy.

First Concert:

Foxxfyrre: 1976 April Wine, The Whole World is going Crazy tour.
Velvet Head: And has the whole world gone crazy?
Dursten: Why are you asking Foxx how crazy the world is getting? Just watch one episode of Tosh.O.

First Country Visited:

Dursten: The country and twin Cities of Helium on Barsoom. I had an appointment to see John Carter and Deja Thoris about a bartending position in the Palace of the Jeddak in Lesser Helium. But that was before I accepted the Night Managing position at the Grande Nebulae Hotel and Casino.
Velvet Head: Barsoom?
Dursten: Oh yeah, you Earthers call it Mars.
Foxxfyrre: Wait a minute Dursten, the Barsoom series was written by Edgar Rice Burroughs, the same author who created Tarzan. I don’t think you can just barge into someone else’s fiction like that.

Velvet Head: Sure you can Foxx. Me Velvet Head, did Jane--Deal with it.

First Kiss:

Velvet Head: 1976 for their Detroit Rock City Tour. Saw it in Ottawa at the Civic Centre.
Dursten: No, not the band, the girl.
Velvet Head: What makes you think I could get the girl with Gene Simmons’ 12 inch tongue in the house.

First Speech:

Velvet Head: I had to defend my thesis in front of a panel of professors while in University. I did okay, but nerves were running amok.
Foxxfyrre: I know you were really nervous, you even gave Dursten gas pangs.
Dursten: No he didn’t, that was just the burrito we had for lunch. But it did shorten the QandA portion of the presentation. Professor Strand just wanted to get out of the room, even his eyes were watering.

First Girlfriend/Boyfriend:

Foxxfyrre: All my initial trysts didn’t have gender identity problems
Dursten: All your initial trysts didn’t have gender, either.
Velvet Head: They may have had gender, but you can’t call one game of Doctor, and another of Post office as “having a steady”.
Foxxfyrre: Maybe not, but none of them ever had problems licking the stamps afterwards.

First Encounter with a Famous Person:

Bryan Adams 1977. We met the summer of 78.

Foxxfyrre: How about a first encounter with a famous person before they were famous.
Velvet Head: What do you mean?
Foxxfyrre: I mean getting to know a person while they were becoming famous, just shortly before they became big name celebs.
Dursten: Like who?
Foxxfyrre: Bryan Adams.
Dursten: You mean ‘Cut's Like a Knife,’ and 'The Summer of 69' Bryan Adams?
Foxxfyrre: Yes, while he was still the lead singer of Sweeny Todd.
Velvet Head: I remember them, didn’t they sing "Roxy Roller”.
Foxxfyrre: Yes. They were on a club tour and came to the Hotel I was working at. Bryan was too young to remain in the bar when he was not performing. He was only eighteen at the time, and so was I. So we hung around together while I wasn’t working, and he wasn’t on stage.
Dursten: You were both eighteen?
Foxxfyrre: Yes, but he is one day older, he was born on the third of November, I was born on the fourth.
Velvet Head: So why would you call this an 'encounter' with a famous person.
Foxxfyrre: He was a rock star (even that early), and both of us were hanging around a hotel at night. He had groupies, I had looks--need I say more?

First Brush With Death:

Foxxfyrre: Nothing so far...Touch wood.
Velvet Head: Ouch, what did you wrap me on the noggin for Foxx.
Dursten: Bwahahah. That was me, he said touch wood.

First House/Flat Owned:

Foxxfyrre: I have my own cave in Northern Canada.

First Film Seen at a Cinema:

Foxxfyrre: I was a Drive-in baby. On Saturdays, my parents would get ready to go out, and I would get ready for bed, meaning I had to get my pyjamas on. Then we all got into the car and went to the Drive-In--Always a Double Feature on Saturdays. Don’t ask me what movies were playing, for this was a weekly routine, but what I really remember is Mom and Dad both snoring in the front seat, and I had to wake them up for Dad to drive us home. I still have the collection of Drive-In speakers to prove it. (Dad always got startled when I woke him up because the movies were over, and would drive away without taking the speaker out of the window). I think that’s why I am a fan of Science Fiction and Horror B Movies. I still don’t understand why I was the one that had to wear the pyjamas--I actually watched the movies!
Velvet Head: That explains a lot.
Foxxfyrre: What do you mean?
Velvet Head: I just meant, all that time watching Sci-Fi and Horror double features at such an early age probably fostered your vivid imagination, and that’s how we came into being.
Dursten: What’s a Drive-In?

First Media Appearance (Radio, Newspaper, TV):

Foxxfyrre: Was in a TV Commercial for the restaurant I was working at in Ottawa. Just a local thing on a local station, so no thespian career was in the works.

First Hospital Stay:

Foxxfyrre: Birth, but I really don’t remember much.

First Book You Remember Reading:

Foxxfyrre: Gray’s Anatomy. My Mother was a nurse, so there really wasn’t any fictional books to read when I was really young.

First Pet:

Foxxfyrre: My baby sitter, I was six.
Dursten: I think they meant your first animal.
Foxxfyrre: Oh, Black Labrador. His name was Spike.
Velvet Head: Nice cover Foxx.

First Election You Voted In:

Dursten: Voted in favour of the bill that Admiral Archer introduced to instill a Prime Directive of planetary exploration. The Bill led to the foundation of the Federation of Planets.

Foxxfyrre: There you go mixing our fictions again.
Dursten: Can somebody please Beam Foxx out of here.

*****

That's it for this weeks Sunday Stealing

TTFN

Sunday Stealing: The Basically Obscure Meme; Foxxfyrre Style version 2.5

2013-02-18T22:00:00.001-07:00

Sunday Stealing: The Basically Obscure Meme 2.5

Foxxfyrre Style: Version 3, edit 56

Sunday Stealing is a long running meme, originated by +Bud Weiser , and is now hosted by +Mr Lance .

Again, it’s going to be Foxxfyrre style, and if you’ve read version 1 and version 2, of "The Basically Obscure Meme," you already know what Foxxfyrre style means, but for the rest of you--

Please deposit 25 cents in side bar on the left--every play is a winner!

Example prizes include:

1. Your weight will be guessed by someone that knows you a lot better than I.

2. Your lucky lottery numbers will contain members of this set of digits {0,1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9}. Sort them as you like.

And finally, I will not use sponsors this week to answer the questions. Me, myself, and possibly, I will do that for you, and we are named Foxxfyrre, Dursten Shaw’tz, and Velvet Head--in that order.

38: How did you spend Valentines day?

Foxxfyrre: Mooning over my Hammy. Really! I went a little overboard on the cloves for my surprise ham roast dinner. Now I have a dinner that will cure the common cold. My sinuses are nice and clear though.

39: Do you eat enough vegetables?

Dursten: Are you crazy! You know in this day and age they genetically alter everything that grows. So I'm sticking to my tried and true Soylent Green.

40: Do you like horror movies? How about thrillers?

Foxxfyrre: Hell Yeah! The creepier the better.

Dursten: As long as they have got nothing to do with empty old hotels.

Velvet Head: Big fan of the 50's Sci-fy horror B movies.

41: Do you like scotch?

Foxxfyrre: Nope, GM only.

Dursten: Are you kidding, we only serve Synthehol.

Velvet Head: The sticky tape, or the eggy-breakfast thing? I have shares in 3M Company, so I really hope you mean the sticky tape.

42: Who is someone you would never swear in front of?

Dursten: In front of Granpa, never curse, will I.

43: Coolest thing you've ever seen on Halloween?

Foxxfyrre: A themed costume of a Six Pack of Rainier Beer being chased by a bottle opener.

44: If you could change your natural hair color, would you? To what?

Velvet Head: Are you kidding, my jet black wavy hair is how I got my nickname.

45: What subject would you take if you were forced to take a free class?

Velvet Head: I wouldn't take the subject. I would steal the predicate. Then let's see what those nouns and pronouns can do.

46: Do you use a reusable grocery bags?

Dursten: Grocery? What are we in the dark ages? Just tell your iFridge what you want.

47: City or nature person?

Foxxfyrre: Au naturelle, of course

Dursten: City, if only I can get my transport credentials back.

Velvet Head: I'm with Foxxfyrre, but it has to have a bar.

48: Have you ever used something other than "makeup" as makeup? (Like paint? Markers?)

Foxxfyrre: Uhm, green food colouring.

Dursten: Were you trying to be a member of the Orion Syndicate, Foxx?

Foxxfyrre: Noooo.

Velvet Head: Bwahahaha, No Dursten, it was St. Patrick's Day and Foxxfyrre thought that he would change the colour of his edible undies to green. Didn't work to well, but Foxxfyrre ended up with a convincing Leprechaun if you get my drift.

49: Do heights bother you? can look look out the window on the top floor of a skyscraper?

Foxxfyrre: Only bothers me on a ladder.

Dursten: Only bothers me if I am low enough for gravity to make me fall.

Velvet Head: Only during the Reverse Cow Girl. Fell off once. Nasty, nasty sprain.

50: Post 5 awesome things about your blog. BRAG AWAY!

Foxxfyrre: Silliness squared. I like stretching my silly bone in posts.

Dursten: What about INN SPACE? You keep promising that you'd post more stories.

Foxxfyrre: I will Dursten, I promise.

Velvet Head: Hey, what about those other stories you wrote? Like "Chester and Finnigan: A Freindly Haunting" in which I would never have been 'introduced' to the blogoshpere if you didn't post it. And your are being too modest Foxx. You know you love Blogblast for Peace and the posts you have done for them like "Little Tommy Taylor".

Foxxfyrre: I do like doing these memes, and you are right Velvet, I do love participating in Blogblast for Peace.

*****

I hope you enjoyed this final episode of the Basically Obscure Meme for Sunday Stealing. Foxxfyrre thanks you, Dursten Shaw'tz thanks you, and Velvet Head thanks you for stopping in to the Honk'n'Holl'r

Dating Profile's Comeback Challenge: The Lost Episode

2013-02-10T19:41:00.002-07:00

Many moons ago, I used to play a meme challenge that was inspired by Mimi Lenox and her popular Dating Profiles of the Day Blog. From this blog, Mimi would issue a meme challenge to write the best "Comback Lines" to the real dating profiles she would find on dating sites. I found this set of dating profiles still in draft, and were not answered. I guess after a few years, I should finally get cracking and get to it. And what better time to answer these profiles with my comeback lines, for Mimi has adapted her blog into a Facebook site called Dating Profiles of the Day.

For me to do anything of this nature, I have to put a Foxxfyrre spin on things and for this Comeback Challenge, I thought I would use some sponsors to provide the comebacks. The I thought to myself, "Self," I said, "what if the Addams Family discovered Match.com?" So this lost episode of Mimi Lenox's Dating Comeback Challenge is brought to you by,

So let me just blow the dust off and brush away the cobwebs on these Dating Profiles and let the Addams get to the Comebacks. Remember, as scary as it might seem, the numbered profiles are real.

1. I can cook myself pretty well. I like new experiences and will try anything once.

Grandmama: I wonder if he will use Tarragon and Eye of Newt?

Morticia: I think you should show him respect, and at least taste him first.

Grandmama: You're right as usual. Where are my manners? I can always season him later.

2. Looks Ant Every Thing

Thing: (Tapping out Morris Code)

Morticia: Are you sure that's Ant Thing on eHarmony, Thing?

Thing: (Tapping Morris Code)

Morticia: Well Ant Thing has been very lonely since Unc Thing was killed in that horrible roller-skate accident. She deserves to have some amour in her life.

Gomez: Mon Cherie, that's French!

3. I want to be truely in LOVE. Been like a dog chasing a bus, except I know what to do when I catch it.

Cousin It: Bweep pip bu bip dweep

Gomez: Sounds like she's quite the catch, and she knows what to do with you.

Cousin It: Zup zit zat!

Morticia: Alright, and have fun. But please don't bring any more buses home.

4. I have NO, NONE, ZERO internal filter. Much to the horror of those around me if I think it I say it.... I am that guy that will spew non-stop garbage from my mouth just to see how far I can go before people realize I'm insulting them to their face. For some reason some people think I'm an arrogant s*@t.... That's so not true!

Lurch: You rang?

Morticia: I know we forgot to get that filter installed when you were being assembled, but you are being much too hard on yourself in your profile.

Gomez: She's so right, Old Man, you are much more rude than that.

5. My main goals in life are to built a house, have a son and plant a tree

Gomez: Are you sure this girl is the ONE?

Uncle Fester: Positively. Read her profile again then tell me she's not the ONE.

Gomez: I see, you're right old man. She can provide you something to blow up, dismember, and up-root.

Uncle Fester: Yes, and not necessarily in that order.

6 The match comes down to weather I find you attractive. For me, that attraction starts with physical looks. Yeah, yeah that makes me a shallow bastard I know but looks are high on my list.

Wednesday: Mother, Pugsley's putting fake profiles on Plenty Of Fish again.

Morticia: Tell him I said that he is too young to date.

Wenesday: He's not looking for dates Mother, he wants to restock the Skeleton Closet.

Morticia: Oh, that's fine then, I know we are getting low.

7. Catch Your Eyes?

Uncle Fester: Got your spleen!

8. I think of myself as intelligent, and am looking for a smart woman. My motto is, you can't think of everything. But you should try. (NOTE: This was his entire profile)

Wednesday: Then he should have known that I would have the moat stocked with alligators.

Pugsley: But N.J, wasn't just our friend, he was our only friend.

Wednesday: Still, he should have thought of everything.

9. Lets see. I have arms and legs, 10 fingers and 10 toes. I want the same thing every other guy wants, but I typically go about different ways of getting it. I like to think I'm clever, but I'm not sure how well that is working out for me.

Morticia: Your Honour, despite all those imperfections Mr. Draper has put in his personal statement, I still think Grandmama and Mr. Draper can hit it off famously.

Judge Kramer: But your Mother is here for kidnapping Mr. Draper and caging him up with a lion.

Morticia: Oh no Your Honour, Kitty Kat just wanted to play for a while.

10. Are you my future X?

Wednesday: No, but it does mark the spot!

*****

It was fun to actually bring this one out of the Draft Dungeon and actually do it!

TTFN

Sunday Stealing: Foxxfyrre Style part 2

2013-02-07T14:44:00.000-07:00

The Basically Obscure Meme: Part 2

This week I've decided to participate in Sunday Stealing which is now brought to you by +Mr Lance , but was originated by +Bud Weiser many moons ago. Like everything I do, I put my own spin on things, like posting Sunday Stealing on a Thursday. This edition of Sunday Stealing I thought that I would use sponsors to complete the meme. So this Sunday Stealing is brought to you by the cast of

"All in the Family"

The Cast Members will answer the questions for me. Sorry to those of you who are too young to remember All in the Family, but I recommend finding a retro channel or Youtube to get a taste of a large segment of television history. I hope you all enjoy this little trip down TV memory lane as much as I enjoyed writing it. Just for fun, the cast responses are not from the show, they are written by me (I tried to stay true to the characters), all except for one line which is from the show. If you think you know which line is from the show, put your guess in comments. Let see who knows their All in the Family trivia!

The meme questions are the numbered ones, just so you know, but I know you did.

Warning, it might get a little loud in here.

21: Would you swear in front of your parents

Gloria: Are you kidding me? I haven't even told my father that Michael is Polish yet!

22: Which continents have you been on?

Archie: Just one, the Good Ol' US of A.

Micheal: USA is only a country, North America is the continent, Arch.

Archie: The North and the South are all one, Meathead! Has been since Lincoln won the war back then see.

Gloria: No dad, Micheal's right. North America is the continent that includes the USA, Canad....

Archie: Stifle right there Gloria. See what you started Meathead, let me get the Funk and Wagn....

Micheal and Gloria: And Mexico!

Archie: Gggghheeeessss Louise! Will ya let me even read it before youse two spout off like that.

23: Do you get motion sickness? Any horror stories?

Edith: Just this one time when your Father took me to Coney Island and he took me on the rides after I had too many Coney Fries.

Gloria: No Ma, I said morning sickness.

Edith: No...We went in the afternoon.

Gloria: No Ma, m-o-r-n-i-n-g sickness

Edith: Oohh, OOOHHH Gloria!

Gloria: Yes Ma, morning sickness!

Edith: OOOOhhhh Gloria.....What are we going to tell Archie?

24: Why did you name your blog whatever you named your blog?

Archie: Speak American Meathead!

Michael: I am speaking English, Arch. A Blog is a new way to communicate with people everywhere.

Archie: And what's wrong with the phone? But don't youse be rackin' up no long distance charges.

Michael: No, a blog is more like a news paper that you can get your message through with.

Archie: And next you'll be telling me that you can read these messages on the phone.

Michael: I give up.

Archie: That was too easy, I didn't even have to tell you to stifle.

25: Would you wear a rainbow jacket? A neon yellow sweater? Checkered pants?

Archie: What? You couldn't get the stains out George? I thought youse guys were good at that sort of thing.

George: No Archie, I meant...

Louise: That's it George, we're leaving. I told you you couldn't talk sense to Archie.

George: But Wheeesie...

26: What was your favorite cartoon growing up? Post a picture if you can.

(Just to keep things in context)

27: In a past life I must have been a...

Archie: You been drinking some of your top shelf stuff Kelsy?

Kelsy: No, I just meant that I've been thinking of moving on. You wouldn't be interested in buying the place, would you Arch?

Archie: Hmmm, I'll have to think about that. Maybe next year.

28: If you had to look at one city skyline for the rest of your life, which would it be?

(What skyline do you think I'd post with these sponsors on board)

29: Longest plane ride you've ever been on?

Archie: Going to your daughter Carol's wedding, Maude.

Maude: We were on all that flight Archie, and it was only for an hour and a half.

Archie: Exactly, you were on it.

Maude: Why you old...

Archie: (Raspberry)

30: The longest you've ever slept?

Archie: During Carol and Pete's Wedding Service

Edith: But Archie, that was a beautiful Wedding Service. I remember we were all sitting in the family section in the Church. Carol was wearing that blue brooch I gave her to wear for something blue. Maude bought her that beautiful pearl necklace for something new, and I gave her your black arm garter...
Archie: You gave her my what?
Edith: Your arm garter, we didn't have time to go shopping to get her a real garter for the garter toss and she needed something borrowed anyways.
Archie: That was my arm garter? I needed that for poker nights with the boys, you Dingbat. I had to go buy a new pair.
Edith: You didn't need to look for it, you were the one that caught the garter, don't you remember Archie?
Maude: And you pushed two bachelor's and Cousin Mickey over to catch it.
Archie: Gggghhheeeeeeess Louise! Will youse two stif....
Edith: And he still has it in his cuff-link box on the dresser.

Archie: Stifle Dingbat! It was a fine wedding until the Best Men showed up.

Maude: What men? There was only one Best Man.

Archie: Then it was you standing beside the guy standing beside Pete.

Maude: Archie, you're lucky I didn't lace this orange juice with Kaopectate!

Archie: (Raspberry)

Maude: I used X-lax instead.

31: Would you buy a sweater covered in kitten pictures? Would you wear it if someone gave it you for free?

Edith: Oooh Gloria, you know your father wouldn't let me wear anything hippie.

32: Do you pluck your eyebrows?

Michael: No Arch, I don't pluck my eyebrows.

Archie: Good. it's one thing having a Polack in the house, but it's another to...

Michael: Another to...what?

Archie: ...Have a hippie in the house.
Micheal: That's not what you were going to say, Archie,
Archie: That's exactly what I was going to say, Meathead.
Micheal: I don't think so Archie, you were going to say.....
Archie: Now don't youse be going putting no woyds in my mouth, Meathead. I know what I was going to say.

33: Favorite kind of bean? Kidney? Black? Pinto?

Edith: Oh no Sir. Archie only eats the Frank and Beans.

34: How far can you throw a baseball?

Sammy Davis Jr.: About as far as I can throw this Archie.

Archie: Well, what the hell--he said it was in his contract!

35: If you had to move to another country, where would you move?

Gloria: With the baby coming, and you between jobs, you know the farthest we can move is next door.

Michael: But we can dream, can't we?

36: Have you ever eaten Ethiopian food? Vietnamese? Korean? Nepalese? How was it?

Archie: No Edith, just order some good American food.

Edith: I just thought you might like something from one of those new ethnic restaurants, but Okay I'll order some Italian from Mario's Eat-aria.

Archie: Finally!

37: How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

Michael: Was that supposed to be another one of your Polish jokes Arch?

Archie: Only a Meathead knows for sure.

*****

Instead of my usual TTFN sign off, I will let Edith and Archie sign-out the way they opened the show.

...Those were the days...

Sunday Stealing -- Foxxfyrre Style

2013-02-02T18:52:00.001-07:00

Sunday Stealing

I've been given a slight nudge to participate in Sunday Stealing. It's a meme that has been around for quite a few years and was originated by Bud Weiser of WTIT:The Blog. It is now being hosted by my friend Mr Lance. I won't go into the history of the meme, or it's rules. Nor will I tag anybody to participate, but if you want all the above, stop into Sunday Stealing here. I have never followed meme rules by always putting my own twist on things. This will be no different.

The meme questions are numbered and in bold text. My answers are anything and everything else.

"The Basically Obscure Meme"

1: Do you notice a persons eye color?

That would be peeping!

2: White, milk, or dark chocolate mocha?

(I wasn't the one who put the comma after white in the question, so you get three things.)

Brown

Coffee

Nectar of the Gods

3: If you could get a tattoo free, would you do it? what would it be?

Myself as a Centaur Warrior with my wife riding proudly on my back wielding a fire sword. I'm going to wait until everything has finished drooping and stretching first, so that it won't look like a two headed eel carrying a shield and lance.

4: Did you grow up in a small or big town? Did you like it?

I grew up in six Provinces, and four States, so North America is just big enough, thank you. And I liked it.

5: Your favorite adult as a child? (and not your parents, if they were your favorite)

All the adults that were in my Dad's magazine collection. I can't remember the names of the magazines though, but I do remember that I admired them very much.

6: What kind of smoothie sounds really good right now?

Not into those Brazillianny things, but I did think the heart shaped one was interesting.

7: Most embarrassing moment from your elementary school years?

Spontaneous-you-know-whats because I didn't know why, and neither did anyone else. I should have known, studied harder, read more, but Kindergarten really had a poor library selection. That was the embarrassing part.

8: Most embarrassing moment from your middle school years?

Spontaneous-you-know-whats because I knew why now, but Miss Manning, my sixth grade teacher that I had a real crush on, noticed, but didn't know why. That was the embarrassing part.

9: Most embarrassing moment from your high school years?

Spontaneous-you-know-whats because now there was a whole Army-at-ATTENTION rutting and marking their turf. I kept thinking, "Why, Why, Why," but then I got caught in the cafeteria lacing the chilli with Salt Peter. That was the embarrassing part.

10: Have you ever fired anyone?

Once, but then I wasn't allowed to play with matches any more.

11: Have you ever climbed a tree more than twenty feet off the ground?

Binary Tree

Only binary trees. Our computer lab was on the fifth floor. That's much higher than twenty feet, so it counts!

12: Did you like swinging as a child? Do you still get excited when you see a swing set?

Did you read question 7, 8 and 9?

13: If you could have any pet in the world, illegal or not, what would you get?

A female centaur.

14: What's your favorite place to relax?

Alpha Centauri. That's her full name.

15: What's your most favorite part of your personality?

The part that does all the outside voices. I really like her smart ass comments that I would never say myself.

16: Madonna or Lady Gaga? Neither? Both? Who cares?

Exactly!

17: Have you ever watched the Superbowl all the way through?

No, but I do get them to deliver Pineapple Chicken, Sweet and Sour Pork, Chop Suey, and Steamed Rice once in a while.

18: Have you ever watched any major sporting event live?

Nuff said?

19: What's the most delicious food you've ever eaten in your life?

My Mother-In-Law's Christmas Dinners. The spreads she put on was amazing.

20: Margarine or butter? Which did you grow up with?

Bacon drippings. It adds life to any sandwich!

TTFN

Nothing

2013-01-27T18:49:00.001-07:00

Nothing

Yes, nothing.

Nothing is defined as: No thing, not anything.

According to Google Dictionary.

If nothing has a definition, doesn't that make it something? Some of anything?

I can prove that nothing is something. Imagine that I give you a box. A box that is wrapped and closed so that you do not know what is inside. I even tell you that it may contain something or nothing (I can't say that it contains everything, for even I don't have those skills). You open it and find the box in one of two states, a state where there is something (a member of anything) in the box. Or the state where there is nothing in the box. Not only does nothing have a definition, it also has a state. So nothing is something which is a member of anything. That nothing you found could have been that cat that Schrodinger was talking about. Wouldn't that have been something!

Children have known the concept on nothing is something, and have probably know it since the beginnings of time. Just ask any child what they're holding behind their back. It is always nothing.

But I digress, for I really wanted to post nothing here. Which is proving more difficult than I first thought, for posting nothing is posting something. I figured that I needed some help to post nothing, so I turned to Google and Wikipedia to continue my research, for they collectively know everything which would include nothing--Right?

Boy was I wrong, they really do know NOTHING.

Entering nothing in Google's search bar, I believed that I would get nothing in return, but to my dismay, it returned 1.9 BILLION hits. That's one heck of a lot of nothing. What are their spider-bots doing? I suppose -- nothing.

Wikipedia was no better. Putting in nothing returned this.

A Disambiguation Page? Holy Crow!

I have to be specific with nothing? Nothing now has topics? Types? Styles?

This was getting me nowhere fast! (Hmmm, Nowhere, but that'll have to be another post).

All those hits, and all those topics about nothing, I don't have that kind of time to research nothing. Then I thought, because I am a visual learner, maybe I would try a Google Image search of nothing. I thought I would get:

But nnnoooooooo!

Thousand upon thousands of nothing images. There were Nothing Cartoons. Nothing people, Nothing Photographs, Nothing Paintings, which were kind of dark for my taste by the way. There were Nothing Bands. Nothing Music, Nothing Albums, Nothing Art, Nothing Tools, Nothing Quotes, and even Nothing Places. There were Nothing Celebrities, and even Nothing Billionaires, most notably:

The Social Network Guy found in a nothing image search.

Which, now that I think of it makes sense, for this is the gentleman that made billions on a website that literally gets millions of people spending hours upon hours doing NOTHING. Isn't that something!

After all the research and scouring thousands of images just to gain a little insight on nothing to be able to post absolutely nothing, I failed in my task. Or did I?

One thing I did learn from researching nothing is when someone has done me a HUGE favour and I thank that person for it, if that person responds with, "Oh, it was nothing," I will know in my mind

The Node that understands nothing.

and in my heart that it was EVERYTHING!

ttfn

And if I could, could I get that box back that I gave you? I want to keep trying till I find that darn cat once and for all.

In the Spirit of Giving

2012-11-19T14:58:00.001-07:00

Now that we are getting closer to Christmas, I have been noticing that the 'Spirit if Giving' is growing as we get closer. Never mind the busy stores, the commercialism, or the advertising blitz, when you do see the Spirit of Giving happen 'just because,' it is wonderful to see. I found this little story about giving back to the community, and think that it's a wonderful way to start the season, and I just had to share.

The Haircut

One day a florist went to a barber for a haircut. After the cut, he

asked about his bill, and the barber replied, 'I cannot accept money

from you, I'm doing community service this week.'

The florist was pleased and left the shop.

When the barber went to open his shop the next morning, there was a

'thank you' card and a dozen roses waiting for him at his door.

Later, a cop comes in for a haircut, and when he tries to pay his bill, the barber again replied, 'I cannot accept money from you, I'm doing

community service this week.' The cop was happy and left the shop.

The next morning when the barber went to open up, there was a 'thank

you' card and a dozen donuts waiting for him at his door.

Then a Member of Parliament came in for a haircut, and when he went to

pay his bill , the barber again replied, 'I cannot accept money from

you. I'm doing community service this week.' The Member of Parliament

was very happy and left the shop.

The next morning, when the barber went to open up, there were a dozen

Members of Parliament lined up waiting for a free haircut.

---------

At least we know that our MP's are 'practiced' at the Spirit of Receiving!

TTFN

Okay I know I'm getting older but really !!

2012-11-15T19:21:00.000-07:00

It seems that many of my friends and family have been trying to tell me something. My inbox has been flooded with these nice photo reminders. Don't worry, I know who they are and I will get my sweet...Mmmmm, something sweet sounds nice, "Lola, what's the name of that place that serves that peanut and ice cream, and chocolate fudge dish?"

"You mean DQ?"

"No. That Dairy place I like. I'm just telling every one here on Facebook how much I like Star Trek."

"You're talking about a Peanut Buster at Dairy Queen, and you're not on Facebook you are blogging."

"No, but that sounds nice. Let me just finish this tweet about the elections, I can't wait till they are over."

"The elections are over."

"Really? Al Gore got re-elected didn't he?"

"Al never ran, and was never President, Obama got in for a second term."

"Oh, then let me just finish this email to Jodi. I want to thank her for this google map to the Senior's Center to go see Mom. Then we'll go to Tim Horton's for a dough-nut and coffee like you said."

"Your Mom's not in a center, she's at home with the puppies."

"Oh, See this picture that Jason Instagrammed on his travels to Colorado?"

"Jason was never in Colorado, and he didn't send it, I did."

"Oh."

----------------------------

TTFN

But I really did get this photo in my inbox on my birthday. I know where you live John! Bwhahahaha

Dining Etiquette with Little Edward

2012-11-14T20:54:00.001-07:00

It's been a while since I've really posted anything on Honk'n'Holl'r, so I thought I would post some humor featuring Little Edward. Little Edward is Little Johnny's "Uptown" cousin.

The Polite Way To Pee

During one of her daily classes, a teacher trying to teach good manners, asked her students the following question:

“Michael, if you were on a date having dinner with a nice young lady, how would you tell her that you have to go to the bathroom?”

Michael said, “Just a minute I have to go pee.” The teacher responded by saying, “That would be rude and impolite. What about you Sherman, how would you say it?”

Sherman said, “I am sorry, but I really need to go to the bathroom. I’ll be right back.”
“That’s better, but it’s still not very nice to say the word bathroom at the dinner table. And you, little Edward, can you use your brain for once and show us your good manners?”

“I would say, ‘Darling, may I please be excused for a moment? I have to shake hands with a very dear friend of mine, who I hope to introduce you to after dinner.’”

The teacher fainted…

TTFN

And have a Great Day!

Blogblast 2012

2012-11-10T20:36:00.001-07:00

This year I decided to do something a little different for Blogblast 4 Peace. Usually, as the date approaches, I scour the internet for picture, inspiration, post ideas, or relevant art stuff to make my peace post. Playing with Google Images search page, I tried the usual type of searches that trigger a post idea. But then I got the idea to type in Dona Nobis Pacem just to see what would come up. Besides images of the sheet music, many, and I mean many Peace Globes images were displayed. I took this screen shot (click for larger image).

You can even see Mimi's Grandfather's Marbles. I took this image on November 3rd. One thing that struck me right away was the amount of image results (hits) that Google was reporting 144,000 results, and many were Peace Globes. I decided to try Blogblast 4 Peace

31,800 hits, and as you can see they are almost entirely Peace Globes.

Mimi has been expanding Blogblast 4 Peace to include social networks, so I tried, Blogblast 4 Peace Facebook and...

21,100 image hits.

After 6 years of Blogblast for Peace, I was really quite pleased with how many results were appearing, and it was all started by one wonderful woman that I had the privilege of spending the first Blogblast (Then Dona Nobis Pacem) cataloging Peace Globes.

Looking at these google pages, which I saved on November 3rd, I thought that if tomorrow is Blogblast, how would these pages change on November 6th after everyone has Blogged, Facebooked, Tweeted, Pinned, or Instagrammed their Peace Globes. So I postponed my own Peace Post, and reGoogled the searches and saved them.

Dona Nobis Pacem -- 179,000 hits

Blogblast 4 Peace -- 49,800 hits

Blogblast 4 Peace Facebook -- 33,400

In approximately 2 days from the initial Googling to the Googling on the 6th (I like saying Googling)

DNP --> 179000 - 144000 = 35000 posted images

B4P --> 49800 - 31800 = 18000 posted images

B4PFb --> 33400 - 21100 = 12300

That's 65,300 posted images if Google's numbers are correct.

And if you do this experiment yourself, you will see that the majority of these images are Peace Globe. That's a lot of Globes.

Thank you Mimi for getting all this spinning in the first place.

TTFN

Tagged and an award

2012-07-29T23:21:00.001-07:00

Mimi Lenox of Mimi Writes has tagged me for the the Liebster award! Liebster is a German word which means sweetest, kindest, nicest, dearest, beloved, lovely, kind, pleasant, valued, cute, endearing and welcome.

Thank you so much, Mimi.

Here are the rules for the award:

Each person must post 11 facts about themselves.
Answer 11 questions the tagger has given you and give 11 questions for the people you’ve tagged.
Choose 11 people and link them in your post. Tell them you’ve tagged them.
Remember, no tag backs.

So to start this meme, I have to tell you 11 things about myself...hmm...well:

1. My dad is Italian and my mother is Irish. Yes, that is quite a combination. At times I feel like this guy

and other times

this guy.

Does that make me a Gladichaun, or a Lepriator?

So, it's a short temper (Italian) tempered with a hot temper (Irish) --or is it the other way round? -- that tempered a temper which resulted in a real quirky sense of humor (Me). For food choices it's Italian all the way, just because I love spaghetti. I'll even have it as a side dish for my Shephard's Pie. Italians and the Irish both love to imbibe a little -- I mean a bit -- I mean...well, you know--MUCH, and they both have their favorite potions -- Vino, or Guiness. They're not for me. I met somewhere in the middle and found Grande Marnier (French). Maybe the French are really Irish-Italians? Ya never know, there was a lot of that pillage and diddle stuff going on back in the day.

2. I love animals. Not the slimy, creepy, gooey type. Cats, dogs, horses, deer, pandas, lions, panthers, and almost all baby animals, except for the slimy, creepy gooey type. And of course,

I love animal too.

3. I love anything techy, sciency, futuristicy beit fact or fiction. I'm a can't wait to see what they'll think of next type of guy. But where are the flying cars,

the house-keeping-do-it-all-Rosie-the-Robot-but-cuter robots, or

the transporter, or the holodeck, or the space trips we should all be able to take by now? I've been an avid reader of Popular Science for over 40 years now, and they said that stuff was coming soon??

But where, and when?

Waiting....

Still waiting....

They promised.

But...

They promised...

And what did we really get -- Smart Phones.

Really! Smart Phones?

I'm gonna reach out with my Stupid Phone and call those Popular Science guys for They Promsed!

4. I like spaghetti.

Oh, I said that already. I usually don't repeat myself unless I'm in bed.

5. I love going to the movies, but I really miss drive ins. They were too much fun

Steamy windows, bad speakers (especially after you drive away with one), good snacks, and who cared if it rained or not. You weren't watching it anyway.

6. Star Trek. But I think you may have gotten clued in by number 3.

(Disclaimer: I'm not a Trekkie, or a Trekker, just a fan)

7. I detest politics -- all kinds -- The government kind, the office kind, the family kind, the politically correct kind. If something happens to you and you can say that it all stems down to the politics, I won't like the what (or rather the why) it became political.

8. I don't drive. I don't have a reason why, I just never got a license.

9. I really like walking, and I walk a lot. Not because I don't drive either.

10. I don't understand why men really like Hockey, Football, Soccer, or Baseball.

If you are playing the sport, then I understand enjoying the game. These sports are fun to play, but to sit there and watch them, and to call them spectator sports. I just don't get it. A male spectator watching men on a field banging heads together. I just don't get it. And sports bars capitalize on this. I tell you, I would much rather watch women's beach volleyball any day. Now that be some good spectating.

11. I love watching big fluffy clouds and see what shapes they can make. I see shapes and faces in almost anything that has patterns or textures, but clouds are random and you never know what you will see

I can see Einstien. I can see an elephant. Oh Oh! I can see the tax collector. What do you see?

____________

For part 2, I will anwer these questions that Mimi Lenox came up with.

1. What is the nearest book to you? Your Kindle does not count.

Uncle John's Endlessly Engrossing Bathroom Reader. I'm not sure how it ended up on my bookshelf, but it is the closest book to where I'm sitting. I think my sister-in-law snuck it in on me.

When is the last time you took a "me" vacation?

Everytime I daydream. I like daydreaming and I do it all the time.

How many telephone numbers do you have?

Just one, and it's attached to my "Stupid Phone".

If you could fix one thing in the public school system, what is the one thing you would do immediately?

Deal with bullying. I'm not sure of the best way to go about it, but it sure would be top on my list of what to fix.

Are you a big tipper?

I'm pretty steady on my feet, so I'll have to say no. Oh, you mean tipping for service, silly me. I do tip appropriately, but if someone has gone above and beyond the norm, I will not only tip well, but make sure management knows that they have a star on their team. Comment cards really do get looked at by management when filled out properly.

Do you watch any Reality shows?

Yes, Star Trek: The Original Series. It seems more tuned in to reality than Big Brother, Survivor, or that show with that Donald Trump guy. Mind you, I almost got entrapped by the Kardashians. I thought is was a new Star Trek spinnoff, but even the real Cardassians aren't as "OUT THERE" as Kim and the gang.

Who is your favorite sports team player?

Uhm, I think I explained that above, so I don't have a favorite player. And I'm too busy watching Womens Beach Volley ball to get their names.

If you could travel in a spaceship to any planet, which planet would you like to visit and why?

If that space ship could also travel in time, I would chose Earth. I'd love to go way back to answer things like how the pyramids were really made. What was Stonehenge really for?

Was the fall of Troy really due to a face that launched a thousand ships, or was Homer just a good story teller? Once I've answered all the 'Ancient Mysteries', I would then travel way into the future to see if we have our holodecks, or flying cars yet. Or have Smart Phones just got so smart that they joined Mensa and have now enslaved the human population. (I think they have kind of enslaved us already. Underhanded, sneaky little things aren't they).

When is the last time you sat in a church?

I don't go as often as I should.

Are there any aspects of blogging that annoy you?

Just the posting interface. I don't use it anymore, I much prefer ScribeFire.

When someone follows you on their blog or subscribes to your Facebook page, do you automatically follow and subscribe back?

Oh yes. If they have taken the time to read any of my silliness, I can sure take the time to read and follow what they have to say. I've got to know some really good Bloggers and fun Facebook buddies that way.

_______

Now it's time for me to make up some questions.

1. If you were omnipitent and omniscient for just one hour, what would you do with all that power and what would you change?

2. What is your favorite memory that you would share?

3. You are sixteen again. What would you enjoy, and what would you hate about being a teenager now compared to when you were sixteen?

4. Most people say that the book is always better than the movie, but have you ever gone back to re-read a book after you have seen the movie, has the movie affected the re-read of the book in a positive or negative way?

5. Where were you in '62 and what were you doing? If you weren't born or were too young at the time, imagine what you would have liked to do?

6. Have you ever had and 'unexplained' or 'paranormal' experience? Please share.

7. If you have one, have you completed anything on your bucket list? Is there anything on it that you haven't completed, but you know that no matter what you will get it done?

8. This isn't really a question, but it is a fun little excercise. Everyone has a favorite colour, and it is a favorite because it may be attached to a meaning or memory that you might not even be aware of. Do an image search using your favorite colour as the search phrase. Many images in that colour will come up, but one image will really stand out for you almost immediately. Post that picture and tell us why it stood our for you.

9. Have you ever tried to cook your favorite dish from your favorite restaurant? Was it a success?

10. Do you have a favorite artist, and can you post or link anything from that artist? (All forms of visual and perfoming arts for this one)

11. If you have an all-time favorite blogpost (your own, or someone else's post), tell us why it's your favorite, and include a link to it so we can all read it.

___________

I'm not going to tag anybody for this one, because it's been so long since I've blogged regularly. But I would like to challenge all my blog buddies to answer the questions I've come up with for it would be fun to read the responses.

Thanks for the tag and award Mimi. It was fun.

TTFN

Requiem for a Gentle Man

2012-01-19T22:49:00.000-07:00

It is a small town in British Columbia that is my Father's birth place. The picture really doesn't do the town justice for this photo, but the photo is taken halfway up another mountain directly south of the town. Fernie is unique, for it is the only town in North America that is completely surrounded by mountains from every direction. It is like the town and that winding, grassy green patch (which is the golf course) is at the bottom of a bowl and to see sky you really have to look up in any direction.

The year was 1968, and a young child started a trek across Canada. I was a city boy. Ottawa Ontario was all I knew back then. As we started the trek, my Dad did his best to describe our destination, for it was to become our new home. For the most part, the trip was quite flat and normal from a child's point of view. The Canadian Prairies is one vast sea of flowing grasses, be it wheat, barley, rye, alfalfa, or whatever was planted, and that view is only mottled by black, oil pump-jacks which greatly out numbered the trees. The first part of the trip, traveling across Ontario, is really different from the Prairie Provinces. Mileage-wise, it is the longer portion, but scenery wise there is much more to see. The northern lake-head route around Lake Superior is like traveling the coastline of any ocean, for all you can see is water at the horizon. More inland, there is maples, oak, chestnut, and many other trees that I couldn't name at the time (if you take the trip in the fall, the autumn foliage is just stunning). And trough this entire trip, my Father was simply trying to describe our destination to me.

None of the scenery or visuals that I had seen on this trip helped me imagine a town completely surrounded by mountains, and you could only get there by traveling across something called a 'pass' which led to a 'summit' that is the highest point of that 'pass'. Dad even described Fernie to me as being at the bottom of a bowl that was made out of mountains. But who was he trying to kid, not me! I was sharper than that. After going across three Prairie Provinces, and passing an 'Ocean' sized lake, I knew that it couldn't really be a bowl. If it was, you would have to go down the side of the bowl to get to the town, and not up through a pass as Dad would have me believe. And his bowl would have to hold water, for the amount of rain and snow that we get up here in Canada, there couldn't be a town at the 'bottom' for it would now be a lake as big as Superior, or even the Mediterranean Sea (I had just learned about the Mediterranean Sea in school that year). I even told him that he must be kidding me, and I was a keen 9 year old that just wouldn't be had. But he insisted on his description of the town. As we did get closer to Fernie, I did start to get a little uneasy for lack of any real comparisons that could help me make sense of his description.

Then the mountains started to form in the horizon, and my nervousness got a little more intense. Dad was getting more excited as we got closer to them. He would start naming mountains that were unique or special in some way. Then he told me about Turtle Mountain, or as the Native Indians from the area called it "Walking Mountain." I asked him why they called it Walking Mountain, and he told me of the local superstitions that Turtle Mountain is slowly moving and has been moving for hundreds of years. It moved so much that in 1903 part of the mountain broke apart and destroyed the small town of Frank Alberta.

"Frank Slide," he called it. So, one of the first sights that I do see is an immense rock slide that covers many square miles and destroyed a town that had the same name as me. Now, Fernie, the town at the bottom of a bowl of mountains was really starting to get me rattled.

"Now," Dad said. "We are really going to start heading up the pass. Crow's Nest pass is what its called. And just before we start heading up it, we will pass Crow's Nest Lake. Did I mention it was bottomless? Yes, a train derailed going around the lake, and they still haven't found it after many many divers tried to reach it."

His stories about the area just kept flowing. Even though I was only 9, I could tell that he really loved the area, and especially Fernie. He told be of the Lost Lemon Mine near Coleman Alberta, and the temperate tunnel just west of Fernie, which is a tunnel carved in the mountain that is about the length of two city blocks, but the weather can be different on either side of it. He told me of the Coal Creek Mining Disaster on Castle Mountain at Fernie's southern edge, where there was a huge coal mine that caught fire, and when he was younger you could see that mountain glow at night. He told me of the legend of the Ghost Rider, which now forms a shadow formation on Mount Hosmer that is clearly visible on Fernie's east side.

This shadow is clearly visible during sundown throughout the summer. The photos do not give this any justice, for it is amazing to watch form as the day draws to an end.

Dad continued his tales as we got closer, and I got more antsy. Then he dropped the big bomb, "Fernie was cursed by the Indian Cheif, and all of them happened. Fires, floods, and famine he cursed the town with." I knew Dad wasn't trying to scare me with all these tales of Fernie's rich history, for he was actually trying to share all that he knew of a town that he loved so much. He even went into detail of our families role in the founding of Fernie. My Great Uncle, Phillip Misisco and my Grand Father Francisco Sirianni played major roles in the town's founding.

Then we entered Fernie from the east side. I was pleased to find out that instead of falling down the side of a bowl, the mountains simply rose up and completely engulfed you in their beauty.

We made our home there for four years, and some of my best childhood memories occurred in that little town at the bottom of a mountain bowl. And Dad was right, all the mountains in the area seem to have their own personality, which he explained as "The Friendliest Mountains in the World." But one mountain always stood out to me, and that is Fernie Mountain itself.

It seems to flow right down into Fernie. I never knew why this mountain held me in so much awe until now. For this summer, Lola, my son, Jason, my daughter, Jodi, and son-in-law, George, with Grand Daughter. Lily in tow, my Mother and myself are making a trip to Fernie. Once there, the boys and myself are going on a hike up Fernie Mountain to a spot called the Moccasin. It is a spot two thirds up the mountain where trees do not seem to grow so it looks like a bare spot on the mountain. The Indians say that it is a footprint left by a great chief. That foot-print-like-look of that spot is why it's called the Moccasin and it looks right over the town of Fernie. That is the spot where I am spreading my Dad's Ashes.

William Forester Sirianni

Sept. 13, 1930 - Jan. 15 2012

Dad We're Going Home.

BlogBlast For Peace

2011-11-04T18:18:00.000-07:00

One Footfall,

Breaks a Path.

One Path,

Blazes a Trail.

One Trail,

Opens a Road.

One Road,

Forms a Highway.

One Highway,

Connects People.

Connected People,

Forms Understanding.

One Thought,

Becomes and Idea.

An Idea,

Develops a Concept.

A Concept,

Leads to a Vision.

A Vision,

Starts a Movement.

A Movement,

Forms a Paradigm.

A Paradigm,

Shifts People.

Shifted People,

Change Worlds.

A Sound,

Forms a Tone.

A Tone,

Becomes a Note.

Notes,

Write a Score.

Scores,

Form Music.

Music,

Transmits Feeling.

Feeling,

Changes Moods.

One Woman Stepped,

Formed a Path,

That's Blazing Trails,

On a Virtual Highway,

Connecting People,

With an Idea,

Now Paradigm,

Moving People,

Changing Worlds,

Instilling Understanding,

One Blog,

One Update,

One Tweet,

One Peace Globe,

At a Time.

For BlogBlast For Peace,

Is Music.

Thank You Mimi.

News Flash!

I think I found it.

I think I found the Great GrandDaddy of the first Cat Peace Blogger!

I just had to share this photo, mercy and tenderness can happen anywhere at any time.

BlogBlast4Peace #79: We, Robot

2011-08-29T22:57:00.001-07:00

Reason 79

We, Robot

Okay. I admit it, I'm a Sci-Fi nut. I especially like anything that has to do with robotics. I like all the robots, even the bad evil ones. A common motif in science fiction stories is to villainize a robot in order to examine and explore our own humanity. There's way too many examples in science fiction stories, TV shows, or even cartoons to go into here, but let's just say that I'm hooked hard-core.

One of my favorite authors that write robotic science fiction is Isaac Asimov. If you've seen the movie "I, Robot", it is loosely based on his "I, Robot" novel and series of short stories, you may be aware of the Three Laws of Robotics for it does explore those laws. If not, I've listed them farther down the post.

In his short stories, Isaac explores the dilemmas the robots can get into if they have been put in positions where they may break one or all of the laws. According to Wikipedia, there is a total of 29 explorations of this type through his stories. And thanks to Wiki, I have some titles I have to hunt down.

Isaac Asimov's Laws of Robotics

A robot may not injure a human being or, through inaction, allow a human being to come to harm.
A robot must obey any orders given to it by human beings, except where such orders would conflict with the First Law.
A robot must protect its own existence as long as such protection does not conflict with the First or Second Law.

Of all the science fiction stories that I have read, or movies that I've seen, I have not seen or read any story which instills upon humans any type of formal laws such as those above for robots. So I took the liberty and wrote them myself.

Foxxfyrre's Laws of Humanics

Lex terrae et hominem: A human must respect and not harm the Earth and its environment or, through inaction, allow the Earth and its environment to come to harm.
Lex nihil noceat: A human must not injure or harm another human or, through inaction, allow a human to come to harm.
Lex quantum ad scientiam: A human must learn from other humans. If knowlege gained is in conflict with the first or second Law, it may not be actively or passively enacted upon.
De lege propriae exsistentiae: A human must protect its own existence as long as such protection does not directly conflict with the First Law, or aggressivly conflict with the Second Law.

What kind of world would we be living in if we followed these laws? The first law protects our little blue ball we live on, therefore preserving it for future generations. The second law simply means "Do no harm." Every doctor has taken an oath where do no harm is a central point. The third law respects knowledge, and the pursuit of pure science. Just because we know the science behind a Nuclear Bomb, doesn't mean we should make one. The fourth law may cause some debate, for many may think it does not allow for one to defend oneself. On the contrary, but it doesn't allow one to OVER defend oneself. Shoot first, ask questions later is in direct conflict with the law.

In an ideal world, could we live with those laws? I think so.

Could they instill peace in the world? Positively.

Could we live with them now? It would be nice.

Will we? There's always hope.

I'll leave you to ponder this a little. I know I will. Here is a little snippet from Wikipedia, which refers to an Isaac Asimov short story within the compilation novel "I, Robot" about his main character Dr.Susan Calvin--

The plot of "Evidence" revolves around the question of telling a human being apart from a robot constructed to appear human – Calvin reasons that if such an individual obeys the Three Laws he may be a robot or simply "a very good man". Another character then asks Calvin if robots are very different from human beings after all. She replies, "Worlds different. Robots are essentially decent."

TTFN

BlogBlast4Peace #80 Peeing on the Linoleum

2011-08-29T00:12:00.002-07:00

Reason #79
Peeing on the Linoleum

Lola and I went to her sister's place for a barbeque earlier today. Laughs, stories, and good food was shared by all. My niece, Tina, was also at the there, but her boyfriend, Pepper, couldn't make it. From what I gather he was also in a little hot water with Tina over earlier events of the day. Tina told Lola the story of why he was in hot water with her and when Tina finished her story she said, "He peed on the linoleum again." Of course, I giggled at this and Tina laughed at me. Tina explained to me that she uses that phrase whenever Pepper has erred. I had to asked how she came up with the phrase, for I haven't heard her use it before. So Tina explained that when they first started living together Pepper got up a little earlier than Tina and went into the kitchen. He was thirsty and noticed that they had run out of iced tea so he made some. He made it like a male would, he grabbed the iced tea crystals, poured in cold water into the jug, placed his hand over the top of the jug and shook vigorously. To his credit, he did shake the jug over the kitchen sink.

A little while later Tina got up and went into the kitchen and was also thirsty, so she went to the refrigerator first. She noticed the newly made iced tea and thanked Pepper for being so thoughtful to make some fresh, Jug in hand, Tina walked toward the kitchen cabinet to grab a glass, but noticed something peculiar and said to Pepper, "Why is the floor sticky?' Before he could answer Tina looked down at the floor and noticed a myriad of nearly dried iced tea droplets on the floor. She pressed further, "How exactly did you make the iced tea?"

Pepper told her step by step how he made the iced tea. Tina immediately schooled him in the proper steps to take and the proper instruments to use, namely. a long wooden spoon to mix the ingredients thoroughly.

Time passed. Then one day Pepper again got up earlier than Tina, and again there was no iced tea, so he made some.

When Tina got up, she was also thirsty and went and got some fresh iced tea, She went to grab a glass and noticed that there was no sticky floor this time and smiled to herself that the schooling must have worked. Nothing more was thought about it. Pepper left for work, and Tina decided she should also get ready and went to bathroom to have a shower. She pulled the curtain back and noticed that the walls and tub were covered with droplets of iced tea everywhere. Pepper still made the iced tea the man way, but thought that if he shook it over the bath tub, there would be no sticky drops on the floor. Tina was a little irked by this, but she also had to laugh. She thought to herself, "Teaching Pepper something is like paper training a little puppy. After time a puppy will get used to the idea of the paper, but will stand there with two front paws on the paper and still pee on the linoleum. You can't get mad at them, but you still have to correct them."

To this day, when Pepper does screw up even though there was an effort to improve from the previous similar situation, Tina calls it Peeing on the Linoleum.

Tina's Peeing on the Linoleum story got me thinking about the state of things, our governments, and the general unrest in the world. Has our governments gone about things the right way? Public opinion of everything that has happened in the Middle East, Afghanistan, and now Libya (just to name a few) has really dropped. Public opinion of NATO, a force that was designed not to fight, but keep peace where there is unrest, has waned. There's even mixed feelings about how Saddam and Bin Laden were finally dealt with. I'm not saying that these tyrants and despots didn't need to be ousted, I'm really asking if the approach our governments took was the right way to go about it, or have we become the puppies that miss the paper? Doing what is right the wrong way. Maybe it is through efforts like BlogBlast4Peace that we can teach each other, and learn from each other. Maybe all these thoughts and efforts from bloggers can reach our governments so they can stop Peeing on the Linoleum.

BlogBlast4Peace #80 Account Closed

2011-08-27T22:19:00.004-07:00

Reason 80

Account Closed!

How would you like a bank account that deposited $86,400.00 into your account every morning that you could spend anyway you would like for that day. There is no charges, no hidden fees, no interest or any other gimmick to get you to join and open an account. At the end of the business day, all unspent funds are removed from your account. If you don't use it today you lose it today. Then the next business day $86,400.00 is redeposited into your account to spend as you wish for that day. I know I would like an account like this, and I'm sure you probably would like one too. The funny thing is we all have this account and it is open 24/7/365 plus an additional day every four years. The currency this bank uses cannot be traded by any Forex Trading Markets, but is still just as valuable as any Dollar, Pound, Euro, Rupie, Zloty, or Yen. The standard unit currency in this bank is 1 second (1s), and the Bank of Day gives you 86,400s every day of your life. I have equated one dollar to one second above to give qualitative value to the second.

So you just recieved your 86,400s deposit into your account, now what are you going to do with it? Just remember, the end of every business day at the Bank of Day your account is emptied. Sure, we spend many of those seconds sleeping, but we need those to recharge our batteries. It's what we do with the balance of seconds that counts. Four hours couch potato-ing for the day is pretty expensive seconds with very little return.

Just in case you don't agree that there is a value to each second, just as there is a value to each dollar and that their worth can be measured and each can fluctuate--

How much is ONE YEAR worth to the university student that just failed core courses?

How much is ONE MONTH worth to the mother that just gave birth to her child prematurely?

How much is ONE WEEK worth to the editor of a weekly newpaper?

How much is ONE DAY worth to the weary traveller that has been rerouted due to airport closures?

How much is ONE HOUR worth to the young lovers that have to work late on DATE NIGHT? (HINT: Value for young love is minimum of double time)

How much is ONE MINUTE worth to the cardiac patient during surgery when his heart is stopped?

How much is ONE SECOND worth to the motorcyclist that just missed side-swiping another vehicle due to his quick reflexes?

How much is a SPLIT SECOND worth to an Olympic Skier?

The value of a second fluctuates and has value to the account holder. Initially every second has the same value, but it is how the account holder spends those seconds that creates the value higher or lower for each second spent or squandered. It is because of the value of each of these seconds, that we should not involve ourselves in conflicts, wars, uprisings and such. For every war we get into, it is literally going into the Bank of Day and closing someone else's account--many, many accounts.

We become the Bank of Day's auditors and shut down accounts at will. We can't do that in any other financial institution, so we shouldn't be able to close others accounts in the Bank Of Day either. When we strive for peace, and actively pursue it, we become the Tellers at the Bank of Day greeting everyone with a smile and saying,

"How can we help you today."

TTFN

BlogBlast4Peace #81 Colours

2011-08-27T05:02:00.001-07:00

Reason #81

Colours

The world is full of colour.

The Aquamarines,

The Yellows

The Greens

The Oranges

The Reds

And even the Whites

But nuclear winters wash all the colour away.

But Blogging4Peace

Can keep everyone in the Pink

TTFN

BlogBlast4Peace Reason 82: Love Letters

2011-08-21T21:37:00.000-07:00

Reason #82

Too many Love Letters

I'm dedicating a short story I wrote a few years back called Lixue and Salvatore to this years BlogBlast4Peace. Without including any spoilers, please pay close attention to dates in the story.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Lixue and Salvatore

by Frank Sirianni

April 11, 1918

My Dearest Lixue,

Every day without you is agony. When I can close my eyes, all I see is you. When I wade through the trenches, gun and mortar fire all around me, I smell the sweet smell of lavender. A lavender that is you. I taste you, sweet as morning dew infused with honey. I taste you. Not one moment of this bloody war goes without the wanting, the yearning, the need for your caress. To touch you. To share a kiss, tasting our love.

They say this is the war to end all wars, Lord, I hope this is true. True and quick. For as soon as it is over, I'm not ever returning to England. I'm booking us passage to San Francisco, just as we talked about before I left Hong Kong to be in this damn battle. I can't bear to be away from you any longer. I don't have too much time to write you, the battle has been severe, but today the guns have slowed.

My Beautiful Snow,
Love and always,
Salvatore

May 27, 1918

My Salvatore My Love,

Every day is longer than the last. Without you, I'm empty inside. I worry everyday. But everyday I pray, I pray for your safe return. I return every full moon to the Pagodas of the 10,000 Buddhas and sit in the square just as we did so many months ago. Even though I am alone, you are there with me confirming our love, and melting my inner being. I can only imagine the hell you are going through, fighting some war that seems so distant.

The little news that we get of the war seems hopeful, Germany is showing signs of weakening. They say it is only a matter of time and Germany will surrender. I just pray that you stay safe and well till that time.

All my Heart
My savior
Lixue

June 9, 1918

My Dearest Lixue,

They pulled us out of the last battle only to move us to a more bloody fight. I lost two friends this week, both were just young men that would have had a whole life ahead of them if is wasn't for this bloody war. I keep hearing that the allies are gaining a stronghold and that Germany is weakening and ready to surrender, but it doesn't seem that way in the trenches. Each fight just seems bloodier, more vile. All I can think about is when this tour of duty is over, and being with you. Every day is more laborious than the last without you.

When we're one again
Salvatore

June 21 1918

My Salvatore,

It seems that everyday, lately, we hear more and more news about Germany's weakening stance. The war may be over soon, at least that's what the papers are reporting. You could be coming home anytime now, but when you do return, there will be a little surprise for you. We are going to have a child. I didn't tell you earlier because I thought it might distract you on the battlefield. But now that it seems that you'll be coming home soon, I just couldn't keep it from you any longer. I'm due in August, and the doctors say everything is fine and going on schedule. Maybe the war will be over in time for you to be here for the birth of your baby. I wish it were so.

All My Love,
Lixue

June 12, 1918

Dear Mrs. Lixue Sheppard

It is with our deepest heartfelt regret that we must inform you that your husband, Salvatore Sheppard was killed on the battle field June 11, 1918. I know it is of little consolation, but Salvatore died a hero to his troops, he fought with honor, he fought with conviction. Details of internment will follow in another communication.

Sincerest Condolences,
Lieutenant Major Richard Donner

November 15, 1934

Dear Lixie,

How are things in San Francisco, everything fine I hope? Your mother and father always had plans to go to San Francisco when the war was over. I've enclosed a few letters that I know that you are now ready to read. They are letters that your mother and father wrote to each other during the war. I've had them tucked away till I felt you were ready for them. Your mother gave them to me just before she passed away. She wanted me to give them to you so you could know them a little better, for you were just an infant when she passed. Your parents shared a true love, and from that love, I was blessed with raising the product of their love from bud to blossom. Take care Lixie, and through these letters may you see why we love and hold the memories of your parents with all our hearts. Enjoy your studies, I know you will do well, and don't forget to write...Often!

Keep in touch
Miss you much
Love
Auntie Ming

-------------------------------------------------------------------

Too many love letters. Too many. Sent to and from battlefields, sealed with kisses, scented with love. Too many, still being mailed, still being sealed from the heart with hope. Too many families broken forever. Too many soldiers that never knew the joy of fatherhood. Or even aware that they are to become fathers.

Too many.

Still happening.

TTFN

BlogBlast4Peace Reason 83: Right Now #2

2011-08-18T16:57:00.000-07:00

Reason #83

Right Now

At this moment

Young children all over the world

Are singing and dancing

Before they even realize

There is anything that isn’t music.

Let's hope

That they don't learn these

As their percussion instruments.

Peace

And make

WAR

Worldwide Amity Rapport

TTFN

BlogBlast4Peace Reason #84: Right Now. At this Momemt--Someone

2011-08-16T17:46:00.000-07:00

Reason #84

Right Now

At this Moment

Someone

Is enjoying a beautiful sunrise,

And at the precisely same moment

Somone

Is enjoying a surreal sunset.

Which is as deep as our differences in perspective should ever be.

Peace

and make

WAR

Worldwide Amity Rapport

TTFN

Declare WAR for Peace

2011-08-11T15:42:00.003-07:00

Blogblast4Peace Reason 85:

Declare WAR! for Peace

Yes, I said it, but it’s not what you think. My WAR is an acronym where "war" is a nasty business. To avoid any confusion, my WAR will be capitalized, and the nasty business word will be in small letters and in red. So what is WAR? As I said it’s an acronym, but also a little thought experiment. I’ll explain WAR one letter at a time (which seems to be an unintended motif to my peace posts so far).

First the W, which stands for Worldwide. I don’t think Worldwide needs any explanation for either word choice or meaning as to why it was chosen.

The A in WAR stands for Amity. Why I chose Amity? Well, the synonyms tell their own story, but the definition nailed it for me. Amity: friendship or harmony between individuals or groups.

Lastly, the R, which was my hardest to nail-down choice, stands for Rapport. Why did I finally choose Rapport? Because of one of its simple one word definitions -- Understanding.

WAR equals Worldwide Amity Rapport and is meant to instill Worldwide Friendship and Understanding which is the ultimate goal of anyone who hopes for Peace.

I’m not a word-smith by any means, but if a little thought experiment can turn war -- the absolute antonym of Peace -- into an acronym that becomes the definition and ultimate goal of Peace, then I know that Mimi’s Blogblast4Peace is declaring WAR, not war, for Peace. And as Mimi says about Blogblast4Peace, “One blog post at a time.”

TTFN

BlogBlast4Peace: Reasons 90 - 86

2011-08-05T22:36:00.000-07:00

PEACE

I'm going to look at this simple word peace, letter by letter (but not in any given order), to give my next five reasons to blog for peace.

Reason 90:

Is for

War is just too expensive. I don't mean the money taxpayers dole out every time there is a conflict, I mean the human price. It's just too large a price to pay. Military personnel, on either side of the conflict, killed or wounded. "Collateral damage" you know, the citizens caught up in conflict; women, children, elderly that have lost their lives or maimed for life. The veterans that suffer the ills of war and never retain a normal life after war. The families and friends of the lost. Everyone. Somehow, no matter who it, is pays a part of themselves to war.

Reason 89:

Is for

Earth

Yes, we have the technology to do it real damage. Let's just get it done. Force the big boys to drop the missiles on all those that don't agree with our views. Fall-out, schmall-out. We're smart and adaptable. We can bundle up and get through that nuke winter that the know-alls say will happen. Once it warms up, we will finally create that loving human society that shares the same views.

I mean really, lets get with the program. Even if the entire globe was conflict free, we are still at war with something, and that something is earth itself and we are the aggressors. We need to stop with all the bickering between ourselves and work to reverse the damage we have already done.

Can we reverse the damage? I hope so.

Reason 88:

Is for the

Children

If we don't stop paying those terrible prices, or start looking after our earth, what future lies ahead for them? It's a price they may have to pay.

Reason 87:

Is for

Eager (beavers).

And we should all be eager and industrious and committed to do our part to refuse to pay P, and look after E, so that C will have something for their future C's. They are our Grand C's after all.

Reason 86:

Is for:

If and only if,

we can be that eager beaver (E) and do something

about all the wonderful PEACE letters,

and I pray that we can.

BlogBlast4Peace: Reasons 99 - 91

2011-08-04T23:16:00.001-07:00

Peace is a simple and beautiful word that, unfortunately, we only focus on a single antonym. The antonym that gets the most attention is "war". I'm not creating a philosophical argument here for my readers, but I would like to address many, if not all, of the antonyms of peace. I would like to do it photographically, because if pictures are worth 1000 words, addressing the antonyms of peace in pictures is worth a small tome.

Peace noun

Synonyms:

Way too many to list for this post

Antonyms:

aggitation
disagreement
disharmony
distress
fighting
frustration
upset
war
worry

Reason I blog for Peace #99

Aggitation

As a recognized problem, Road Rage is possibly the most recent example of something that disrupts Peace as a whole, but it has also become a significant problem with many violent outcomes.

Reason I blog for Peace #98

Disagreement

Disagreements happen every day, every where, and for almost infinite reasons.
Many turn violent, many turn tragic, most resolve themselves quickly without dispute, but as this photo does illustrate, most disagreements can be resolved if one only listens closely. Yes, listening does hurt. It is quite painful when you feel that you know better or differently. Listening closely and with some empathy to another 'opinion' reaps more rewards than just becoming another small face on the back of a hand.

Reason I blog for Peace #97

Disharmony

And many more examples -- too many for this post, but all are important texts. All teach harmony, righteousness, PEACE, love, brotherhood. (Notice that they are all synonyms of Peace--that's why it's in capitol letters!) All are important writings that teach by telling stories, or in metaphor, or poetically. All have been interpreted to fit our own needs at any time for whatever purpose...

...think...

...Or...

...Just to show a few.

Instead of learning from the stories we would rather live out the horrors of the stories and say that we do so in His name or His name or His name or His...

"So let it be written. So let it be done."

It has all be written, it's time to learn.

Reason I blog for Peace #96

Distress

If you have ever been in the little boy that is covering his eyes shoes, you will know distress. Bullying, a rampant problem that just seems to persist and accelerate over time. Most victims of bullying simply internalize their troubles, some find real help, some seek small revenge, few lash out to the worst extreme. The latter make headlines. Tragedies that should, and could have been avoided. Bullying is quite a personal subject for me, for I fell victim to it for many of my grade school years. I learned to adapt with humor and I wielded that humor like a sword. If I wouldn't fight 'em, I could make 'em laugh. For me, it worked.

When the first Dona Nobis Pacem came about in November of 2006, I dedicated a story I wrote to Dona Nobis Pacem called "Little Tommy Tailor" about bullying. You can read it here.

Reason I blog for Peace #95

Fighting

All forms for whatever reason. Gang related, race related, youth related, or you-name-the-reason related, fighting ends up here.

Reason I blog for Peace #94

Frustration

We have often felt frustrated at times. I hope this kit helps. If you don't think frustration disrupts peace, think of all the victims of domestic violence (verbal or physical included).

Reason I blog for Peace #93

Upset

See Frustration above.

Reason I blog for Peace #92

WAR

(Imagine Picture Here)

For if we can't stop the global conflicts, there will be nothing left to take a picture of.

Reason I blog for Peace #91

Worry

There is a reason, besides alphabetical, that I put worry as the last of the antonyms for peace. The reason, I feel, is that if we cant look after and solve any of the first antonyms for peace, they all lead to WAR. War in the home, war in our schools, war on our streets, war on our homelands, war globally.

100 Reasons to Blogblast4Peace: My Reason #1

2011-07-28T21:36:00.000-07:00

I blog for peace for many reasons, although sparingly now because of time constraints and obligations.
First, it is a wonderful and inspired idea.

Second, and what's probably a better question, is what "Hooked me on Blogblast for Peace?" The answer is a remarkable person who put her all into something, a person whom I came to respect and appreciate just from her writings. The absolute clincher, though, was an evening I spent helping Mimi with the first full Blogblast.
It was mystical, fully spiritual, and awe inspiring.
Weird and wonderful things happened that night, and no matter how much caffeine that was consumed, or how tired one became, the evening flowed with its own electricity, power, energy, ether, or whatever you want to call the driving force that kept us going that night. I prefer to call it "mystical synchronicity" for as Mimi can confirm, many things occurred that night that cannot be just coincidence. My Lovely Lola was right by my side the entire evening helping me with categorizing Peace globes, and she can confirm, it was magical.

One internet connection with over two thousand miles between two bloggers working furiously to keep up with the incoming globes, and a thought would come over one of us. Thought turned into quick email. Quick email turned into tingles and goosebumps all over. Mystical Synchronicity? It's real and is generated by Dona Nobis Pacem. So not only am I on board with Blogblast for Peace, but I am a firm believer in its inherent power.

TTFN