Foxy Naijarian Lady

La Fin

2015-09-28T14:41:00.000-05:00

La Fin 😊.

Ten Naira Bread

2015-08-30T17:35:00.002-05:00

Hey there lovies!!! Have you given your parents their 'ten naira bread' today. I know you're asking yourself what this crazzzzzyyyyyy woman is talking about yeah? Well, thankfully I'm willing to elaborate. You see, as a teenager, I was told I was extra antisocial and extremely rude/Stubborn. I really don't know what 'they' are on about because I think I was one of the nicest, easiest teens ever but what do I know :) ?
So, anyway, I was in SS. 2 at the time I believe and had the greatest fortune of meeting a young corper, a lady, I'll call her 'N' to protect the innocent but mostly because her name starts with an 'N'. N was sent to serve at my school as an English teacher. She stayed at the girls dormitory and acted as the Matron(God, I hate that word) when the actual matron was busy. Well, as soon as I saw her, I'd decided I didn't like her as she took her 'proxy' matronly duties a little too far. The 'real' matron would do a headcount at lights occasionally and that was it but miss proxy was trying to enforce all the rules. As teenagers, you know most of us hated her overzealous butt and were like, "God, I have to spend an entire year with this?" So, you know I avoided her like a plague and tried my best to be verrrrryyyy distant when I said my,"Good Mornings" , made sure I didn't laugh when she cracked her jokes. You know the rebel life nau? ehen.... So one day, she decided to punish us for something or the other and was giving her sermon. Of course I had the blank stare into oblivion with my signature "Are you done?" mouth twist. Then came the life changing moment for me. She said, " You guys think you are the first teenagers on earth? I've been there and done that!!!". I gave her the side eye and in my mind asked,"ehn, really? how many centuries ago?", lol!! I was evil :) but anyhoo, she went on, "I was so rude, in fact, I was such a terror to my parents and thought I'd have them forever but my dear, at the time I had the worst relationship with my parents, God took both of them from me." Yes foxlettes, her parents were going on a trip, she had just had a row with them and hoped they would stay longer than expected on their trip and guess what? She got more than she had wished for, they never came back. They were killed in a car crash. She said, "I never knew their value till they were taken from me and I had to be raised by my so called relatives." Said relatives took all their parents belongings as she was but a teenager and the eldest of the brood and couldn't stop them and that my friends was when she understood what her parents were worth and in conclusion said, "If I'd known, I would have bought them ten naira bread everyday that I had them since that was all I could afford but at least my widows mite would show them how much I cared for no matter how much I screamed at their funeral, they could not hear me." People, at that very moment, my heart skipped a beat, I thought about my parents and imagined what it would be like to lose them. My heart started beating very fast and all of a sudden, my very hardened, teenage heart melted. She didn't seem very evil anymore, in fact, I wanted to get up, run to her and give her a hug,for my people...this moment changed my life. That weekend, I escaped home from school(story for another day.. one of my many talents was escaping home for the weekend and my parents were my accomplices' :) ) and went home for the weekend and of course my parents were shocked to see me(first time...I secretly think they were thinking, "has she been expelled for being rude?", lol!!!) I told them everybody did it(almost) and I just felt home sick and they were like, "awwww".
So why did I spend some of my life's minutes typing up this epistle? Well, wanted to ask if you'd been giving your parents their ten naira bread of course. I see them as our earthly creators and representatives of THE creator here on earth. If you haven't started, you're in luck, it's not too late. We don't have them forever so, drink of them as much you can while you have them, absorb their wisdom, visit them, call them as often as you can. When you can afford to, buy them something.. It doesn't have to be something big (hence the ten naira bread), just a little something to show them you care for one day they'll be no more but we'd know that at least, while they were here, they knew they were appreciated.

The foxy one signing out, that's as much as I can take right now... anymore and I'd be bawling my eyes out. Shout out to 'N' for changing my life, I hope we meet again... one day soon so I can tell you how you changed me.

Later loves!!!!!!!

Wait it's been a year already?

2015-04-20T15:37:00.000-05:00

Come on now, it's been a year since I posted on this blog? Yikes!!!!! can you say slacker? Okay, okay, I'll try my best to post every week but don't hold me to it, I said that to myself exactly one year ago. So I guess happy new year, happy Easter are in order? hmm? but wait o, SA, what's up with you guys? You guys feel you don't need foreigners in your country? Then why are you guys in other people's countries too. Not to brag but the fact is Nigeria is the most populous African nation and the likes of MTN, Shoprite et all need the Nigerian population and market to thrive. You don't think so, alrighty then, why did they not just stay in SA and how would you feel if Nigerians or all other African nations rounded up all the South Africans and started beating, burning, maiming them indiscriminately to the cheers of bloodthirsty spectators? The great Madiba must be rolling in his grave. The truth of the matter in my opinion is these xenophobic attacks are being misdirected. SA feel like they have been oppressed and discriminated against by a certain group of migrants that had come to their country and up till this day mistreat them but what do they do instead of directing their anger towards the offenders, hmm? I'll tell you what ? they turn against other Africans trying to make an honest living in South Africa and start 'venting' while the police and the president fold their arms and ask Nigerians to leave till things settle down? Are you kidding me? Where do we find some of these weak African leaders? If you are the head of a nation and you can't control your people then you should not wear the crown, simple as that and this is not exclusive to SA. Any leader who cannot lead his/her 'sheep' should NOT be in office and I think it would be really nice if EVERY foreigner in SA left so they don't have any body else to blame for their misfortunes and maybe, they would be able to see that their issues lie within them and existed longggggggggg before people started migrating to SA. It would also be a great idea if every African nation boycotts SA businesses for a year. It'd be nice to see how the mighty island of SA can thrive doing business just amongst themselves. Come to think of it, it would create opportunities for local entrepreneurs to emerge and be successful..... I'm done.

The foxy one

Sunday best vs AIA

2014-04-20T14:14:00.001-05:00

Happy new year dear people of cyberspace. A long over due post eh? oh, I almost forgot! Happy Easter as well. So let me get right to it. I went to mass today(Side note, I love my church so much, it's a multicultural catholic church). I like to sit in the very back not just at church but any where I go. So as I was watching people coming in for mass, you know church is always very full on Easter Sunday nau., I saw different beautiful, brightly colored dresses and all the pretty ladies and very dapper gents coming in then someone caught my eye, a lady in the tightest, shiniest, leggings walked right past me to find a seat and I found myself immediately asking my self why in the world she would wear such an outfit to church and almost immediately, I was ashamed of myself for judging her and really didn't know what to think. So, please analyze this with me would you, do you think it's ideal to wear your Sunday best on Sundays and your skimpiest of the skimpy outfits Mon- Sat or do you think as I am Sun- Sat (AIA- dressing the same way you dress on a regular day to church) is the way to go?
On the one hand, people say you would dress up out of respect for your boss to go to work or to be the winning candidate at a job interview so why not for the biggest,baddest boss of them all right? Well, not so fast, he sees us everyday, Sun-Sat and knows not only what you wear but what we've been up to on Friday/Saturday night(cough) so who are we kidding right? What do you think?

The foxy one.

Paint me Black and Blue

2013-01-13T07:24:00.000-06:00

Nice ehh?????

Happy New year!!!!

2013-01-01T14:57:00.002-06:00

Happy New year lovely people of cyberspace!!!!

Merry Christmas

2012-12-25T16:11:00.001-06:00

Merry, Merry Christmas :)

Where were you when the world ended?

2012-12-22T15:45:00.000-06:00

So the world did not end, thank God!!! but I still believe the Mayans were onto something because the weather sure has been doing some strange things. The wind almost succeeded in flinging my car off the road but I guess the gods of the road kept me safe. So where was everyone when the world ended 12/21/2012? I was at work, hoping the world would actually end so I could skip work,lol!!!

Proud sista

2012-10-29T08:47:00.003-05:00

So my big bro is getting married in december. I can't wait, he is the sweetest dude on the planet. Now I'm not saying this because he is my big bro,I have two big bros and they are both outstanding young men(yels, I brag, I brag,lol), but I digress. I actually honestly and absolutely envy their wives because I swear to you that if they were not my brothers, I would have fought any and every woman on earth to marry one of them (No incesto,lol, just facts) and no, it's not the sister thing, their ladies can attest to this. I am so happy for these ladies though because both my brothers are with ladies who truely appreciate them and would do anything for them,now what could be better right? I'll tell you what , my sisters and I finding equally outstanding dudes to marry and I must say, so far, we aint having that much luck. It's more difficult than that eye of the needle and camel thing I tell you. I know my parents are not the only great parents on earth so why o why is it so hard to find a young man of integrity, who is easy on the eyes and quite ambitious and focused ? Is it too much to ask? It's not like I'm asking for a guy who looks like Will Smith(with out the big ears), stylish like Pharrell , funny like Chris Rock, swaggified like Lenny Kravitz, rich like Bill, who cooks like Govind Armstrong and can serenade me like Usher, though now that I think of it, it would be nice, real nice...So why lord? Why? Please let me know o and yes I am taking applications(I joke,I joke...not).

LOL!!!,
The foxy one.

Dirty ole Men

2012-10-14T17:46:00.002-05:00

Hi there lovely people of cyberspace,how do you do?

So I was taking in walk in the park, trying to clear my head in light of the string of disappointments that have been coming my way for the past 2 months where out of no where 'Methuselah' says:

Methselah:" Hey baby, taking a walk."
Me: "Yes, lovely weather; also clearing my head."

So Methuselah proceeds to tell me howmany miles he walks a day, lists the healthy foods he eats(he fumbles through this part as he can't remember what healthy foods he eats) and then he proceeds to ask me if I was married. After picking up my lower lip from the floor I told him no, to which he responded, o your husband is going to be such a lucky man to which I promptly responded, "Thanks". Then Methuselah proceeds to tell me where he lives to which I respond, "Thanks for the information."
He goes on to ask where I live to which I respond, "Around", he tells me he lives with his niece and that he has been divorced for 5 years ( he was still wearing a wedding band by the way and did I mention he was Methuselah?) and that he loved to wine and dine his 'ladies', make them breakfast in bed (whose bed I wonder?) and take them out. In my mind I was like, so you do what any man in a healthy relationship does? (applause) At this point, I wanted to tell the old casanova to get lost but I politely said, I had to get going, to which he responded, "So, when do I see you again?", in my mind(errr, never,ever,ever,ever........) to him "oh, I'm always at this park (It was my first and last time at that park btw) to which he responded, "Ok , see you tomorrow then 'baby'", I smiled sweetly and said to my self, you got the baby part right, you're old enough to father my father.
So there you have it folks, my question is this though, do the dirty ole men ever change?

Later loves!!!
xoxoxoxo

Parents

2012-05-11T16:35:00.000-05:00

    Hi there lovely people of cyberspace,how do you do? Before I start my rants, happy Mothers day in advance to my mummy and all thelovely mothers out ther. Today I'll be talking about parents in general sha, not just mothers.... I love my parents more than anything in the world. I'm yet to be one but can't wait to be responsible for another and give them all the love I have in me.I'm at that age where each time see I one of those 'little people', I want to have one of my own but on the other hand I wonder if I'll be as good a parent as I want to or what heartbreaks I would face as a parent.
     That said, I don't think parenting is for everyone, each day I hear one heartbreaking story or the other about parents savagely beating or in some extreme cases killing their offspring for little mistakes they make each day. Now I'm not against old school discipline entirely, infact my mummy was a member of the "whoop now, beg later commitee",lol!! but I digress (love you to pieces mum) but sometimes I wonder where the line between discipline and down right hatred is.
    Parents out there, please remember that those little people you take care of each day have feelings too and will be all grown-up one day, I'm not saying spoil them everytime, spoil them when they deserve to be spoiled but also be kind when you are dishing out your servings of discipline.
I'll leave you with a video I saw on youtube,no the parents did not whoop this kid but I couldn't help but feel so sorry for the boy in the video. Please see the video to understand why:

Ps: Emotional torture is worse than a whooping in my opinion.

Disclaimer: I do not own this video o, I was just concerned for little dude in the video :(

What the hog?

2012-04-24T17:06:00.004-05:00

So according to yahoo news, this fella shot his lady friend in both legs because he thought she was a hog. How, when, why, where? Sigh........ hmmm.

http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/abc-blogs/florida-man-mistakes-girlfriend-hog-shoots-her-180030103--abc-news-topstories.html;_ylt=Aqjsn4M.xIm.X2UMFqO6pmfzWed_;_ylu=X3oDMTRvbDVsYzFhBGNjb2RlA2dtcHRvcDEwMDBwb29sd2lraXVwcmVzdARtaXQDTmV3cyBmb3IgeW91BHBrZwMzMmZlZjIyOC03MTYxLTM0ZjctODhjNi1mZTk1MGRlMGZhYTcEcG9zAzEEc2VjA25ld3NfZm9yX3lvdQR2ZXIDYjQzOGVkZjItOGUzYi0xMWUxLWFhYjctYzc2NzljMGI4ZGNm;_ylg=X3oDMTQzdmg1ZGljBGludGwDdXMEbGFuZwNlbi11cwRwc3RhaWQDZDc3Njc2OWMtMTIxZS0zODlmLTgwZGUtODhiYTc4ZDk4YmYzBHBzdGNhdANlbnRlcnRhaW5tZW50fGNlbGVicml0eQRwdANzdG9yeXBhZ2UEdGVzdANjb250cm9sX25vX2xpZ2h0Ym94;_ylv=3

How does that even happen?

Oklahoma Blues

2012-03-11T14:29:00.000-05:00

Hey there people,how have you been? So I thought the part of Florida I used to live in was the most boring, depressing place one could ever venture into. It was even on the list of yahoo's most depressing places to live but boy was I wrong. I just moved to Oklahoma about two weeks ago and I'm about ready to gouge my eyes out with a teaspoon. It is the worst place to live I kid you not. Have you ever lived in a place in the great US of A where most businesses are closed on the weekend? where it is a special occasion to see someone with brown skin? Oh speaking of which, please permit me to digress not totally off topic. Now I'm not trying to start anything but it is a fact that there are some kind of jobs that you expect a black brother or sister to be doing.. I repeat I ain't trying to start nothing but if you want to be honest with yourself you would agree with me when I say certain jobs are reserved for brother and sisters in the US of A and this 'law' holds true in every city/town I've been to but I think I'm drifting too far off topic, so here I was going through the McDonald's drive through to get my breakfast on a cold Friday morning and hmm, that's odd, not a single brother or sister in sight but I brushed it off, got my # 4(lol) and went to work.(PS: I don't always eat McDonald's o, these were extenuating circumstances as I had just moved and my kitchen utensils were still AWOL) now that we've cleared that up, so I went there on Saturday again and went in this time and what did I see? It was like dropping a chocolate chip in a glass of milk, and if you were wondering, yes I was the chocolate chip. The whole Mickey D's crew was Hispanic and the customers? Let's just say they were extremely nice because my coming in helped them say they had a diverse clientele.

I moved here to train for six months after which they will post me else where to be an assistant manager. It's a wonderful opportunity and I'm grateful for it but I can't wait to be done with training so I can move elsewhere and I'm starting a novena for it to be many states away from here cos this place right here? wow!!!

So there you have it folks, if you were planning on ever visiting or moving here, you may want to re-think that or erase the thought all together. I repeat, ladies and gents, we have a winner here. Even if your job offers you a padded bank account and a mansion on a hill here run like hell or you will be moving to hell.

Yours Truly,
The foxy one :)

Ms. Houston

2012-02-12T08:43:00.000-06:00

RIP Ms. Houston, go on home and raise your voice in the choir of the most high.

Something Bothering me

2012-01-24T18:42:00.000-06:00

I grew up in Naija and only moved here after college. I remember getting a fever every now and then (the mosquitoes were not joking o, they had 36 teeth and went to the gym), okay, maybe I'm exaggerating but one of the most common ailments in Naija is the Malaria fever, caused by the bites of these oh so lovely creatures(infected mosquitoes)....oops!!! Back to my point, I would be taken by my ever so caring parents to the hospital to get a shot- now, giving me the shot required my dad giving me the mean side eye and my mum singing songs of praise to convince me to turn around so the scary looking nurse could stab me in the butt, I kid you not, I could wrestle a gorilla to avoid a shot but back to the topic. After getting the shot(s) and the medication rxed by the doctor, I was back to my perfect bill of health ,well, till those pesky mosquitoes struck again, typically after about a year.
Now, why am I boring you with this bit of ancient history? I have noticed that every time I don't feel well and go to see the doctor or get some OTC medication here in the land of milk and honey, the medications help treat(mask) the symptom, never the root cause. If you doubt this, look at most of you rx bottles or the ads on TV, they almost, ALWAYS say, "oh we treat the symptoms" never the cause. This really concerns me, why do we have to live with ailments and be dependent on medications that only mask the symptoms of the ailment and subsequently our physicians? Why can't the problem be fixed once and for all. I thought living in a developed country would mean even better healthcare but boy, was I wrong.
Say, what country do you think offers the best and most effective healthcare?

Dr Oz seems to agree:

http://healthybodydaily.com/dr-oz-in-case-you-missed-it/dr-oz-4-things-drug-companies-dont-want-you-to-know-secrets-drug-companies-are-hiding

When you feel low

2012-01-14T21:38:00.000-06:00

How do you cope when you're low and you don't have any family members that live on the same continent as you? Well you could call your family but what if you need some face to face conversation and not too distant shoulder to cry on? A long distance call or two just won't do then would they? Well you could drop by your friend with sturdy shoulders place and pour your heart out but what if you don't have any such friends huh? What do you do then? Make a call to a random call center and confide in a CSR who wants to come through the line and strangle you? Call your shrink? Drown your sorrows with a couple of shots, at least while the effect lasts?

Different people deal with the blues in different ways; when I've got the hump, I go back to my childhood and the things that made my childhood my safe haven and happy place be it foods I loved as a kid( Mostly candy), Novels like: "Chike and the river" and many wonderful books I read in primary school and Secondary School (Enid Blyton Novels and Some Famous five mystery would be lovely but these are out of my reach right now) , Movies like "Sound of Music" and "My fair lady" make me smile and even cry ( but trust me I feel better afterwards) but nothing takes me back to my childhood like Sesame Street. Now I don't mean the new whack episodes where the Count is a pimp and cookie monster is a gangster (I'm serious, I saw Mr. Cookie rap in one episode and I kid you not), no, I mean the old school episodes with the good stuff that gave you your first shot/dose of common sense. I leave you with some clips of the Sesame street I grew up on; a piece of my childhood .I hope it brings back some wonderful memories or makes a new fan of you depending on when you were born )

Enjoy >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Just watch

2012-01-11T13:43:00.000-06:00

Wow, so poetry and Christ really do blend :)

Hip Hop

2012-01-09T17:12:00.001-06:00

Please check this lady out; I think she rocks!!!!

Is there any good Naija broda out there?

2011-12-16T22:52:00.000-06:00

My people how una dey?I have a problem o,big one for that matter,I've been in this lovely country for about 5 years now and I am yet to see 1 Naija broda that is foine, doesn't have kids,looking for a serious relationship,doesn't have kids and has got his act together,oops almost forgot,doesn't have kids.Is it impossible for a Naija bro to have all these qualities or what?

Akward black girl

2011-12-16T10:42:00.000-06:00

Hey there my peeps,has anyone seen this lady's work? she is hilarious and a joy to watch:

How una dey?

2009-01-10T21:54:00.000-06:00

My people how una dey?Happy new year to all of you,this is your girl Foxy Naijarian Lady,this is my first blog and I just want to introduce myself,tell you a little bit about myself and some of the topics I will be touching in my blogs(as in,my rantings).

Well I'm obviously from naija,the middle belt to be a little more specific,I'm female,in my 20's,I moved to the USA three years ago(no immediate family here with me,that sucks a whole lot I kid you not) and now reside somewhere in florida.I will like to talk about ,well, any darn thing that pleases me darn it :), It's my Blog nau,ah ah.I will try my best not to bore you to death or put you to sleep for that matter(unless you have trouble sleeping,I'll be glad to be of assistance then hee hee) with my blogs.

I look forward to keeping you entertained with my blogs,thanks,you've been a wonderful audience,hope you drop by again sometime.cheers!