Francey Pants

Freddy Forever

2014-02-04T12:17:00.002-06:00

Freddy is a stinky little doggy who likes to sleep on top of the sheets, curled up by my tummy, thereby pinning me between him and the Dude for the entire night and yielding me nary an inch to move in either direction. He has terrible breath and crazy eyes when I'm eating peanut butter and sometimes he actually tries to lick my face off.

But he's so cute. So so so sosososososo SOOOOOOOOOOO cute. I wanted to stare into his little face forever and always, so I commissioned my friend Jo to paint his portrait for posterity.

It is literally the best thing I have ever laid eyes on. Jo deserves the Congressional Medal of Honor and three Peabody Awards. She has now opened her own Etsy shop called Dapper Pet Portraits to immortalize other furry creatures near and far. If you're in need of a gift for the Person Who Has Everything Except a Watercolor of Their Beloved Pet, look no further.

The "Do I Really Want to Do This" Cleanse: Week 1

2014-02-02T18:21:00.001-06:00

This has been a really weird week due to factors that have nothing to do with the cleanse. It's been incredibly stressful for reasons both personal and professional, but with very excellent highlights. Namely, my left hand and a swath of my back have achieved worldwide fame.

Exhibit A:

Exhibit B: Look for the wedding photo, which is fifth from the top. I'm the chick in teal sandwiched between the other chick in teal holding a bouquet and the woman in a red top.

If you want I can sign my autograph with my famous left hand.

***

I started this post on Saturday morning, and had written a really cocky paragraph about how easy this cleanse was and how few cravings I'd had. You'll notice I deleted it. Because it was a lie.

The work week had been relatively easy, but that was largely because I was too distracted with many looming and terrifying deadlines to develop a good craving for anything. The weekend, during which I had large expanses of time in which ruminate upon the mouth-feel of a really good crusty baguette, has been harder. I want a spaghetti sandwich. I want beer ice cream. Is there something cleanse-worthy I can chew on? Because crunchy and mushy are fine and they certainly have their place, but I miss chewy.

That said, I did notice an increased and sustained energy level last week. I wasn't having a mid-afternoon crash followed by a pounding headache, which was de rigueur after a typical sandwich lunch and a few stops at the office candy bowl. And I feel incredibly morally superior about this change in diet after watching Food, Inc. last night, which is not nothing.

***

This is what we ate last week:

Veggie Stir Fry with Tofu and Brown Rice

I subbed snap peas for the bok choy and added red pepper flakes to the tofu. It had lots of nice textures and flavors going on.

Warm Lentil and Potato Salad

Smitten Kitchen will never steer you wrong. Ever. This is so tangy and flavorful and wonderful. It's getting a spot in the Canon.

Roasted Cauliflower and Mushroom Quinoa Salad

I skipped the cheese crumbles (because obviously) and the walnuts (because I didn't have any), and this guy was fairly boring and disappointing.

Fake Chocolate Frosty

1 c. unsweetened almond milk
1 frozen banana
1Tbs cocoa powder
1 tsp vanilla
1/2 tsp chia seeds

This concoction is saving my life by quelling my ever-present chocolate craving.

Goop Smoothie

Matt's dinner: a goop smoothie, made with 100% pure goop. pic.twitter.com/rVw2cC5BhP
— NeenuhPPG (@NeenuhPPG) January 31, 2014

The "Do I Really Want to Do This" Cleanse

2014-01-26T17:24:00.000-06:00

I don't really do diets. The closest I've come is to ditch grains and legumes for the week of Passover, which always feels like Such Torture. So when Matt came home from a yoga class at our gym saying he wanted to join in on the three-week cleanse they were doing my response was, "have fun."

In the end, being a supportive spouse won out, and now we're both on this journey to achieve spiritual enlightenment and cleanse our souls as we cleanse our bodies free of toxins and free radicals. Or whatever. (I know he's really just in this so he has a bikini body before we go to Belize in March, vain bastard.)

Yesterday was the first of 21 days during which gluten, animal products, processed sugars, caffeine, or alcohol shan't pass betwixt our lips. The latter two are pretty easy for me-- I never developed a taste for caffeine, and I'm a social drinker at most. I do love my gluten though. And my yogurt and eggs. And oh, do I ever love sweet treats. You know I love my sweet treats. You probably love my sweet treats, too.

Unlike a juice "cleanse" (which seems more like a starvation fast to me), the point is not deprivation but rather eating better as a whole. Below are some recipes that are going to see me through.

Breakfast

One of my standard breakfast options (cleanse or no) is a smoothie consisting of a cup or so of almond milk, a handful of spinach, a banana, a spoonful of almond butter and a few shakes of cinnamon. It's pretty delish as far as green smoothies go. I'm also going to be making many bowlfuls of warming quinoa flakes with some pomegranate seeds and chia in the vortex-y days ahead.

What I'm missing: my other standard breakfast option of Grape Nuts and kefir.

Lunch

I've been making salads that consist of:
-A few handfuls of arugula
-Half an heirloom tomato, diced
-Half an avocado, diced
-Half a can of black beans
-1/2 tsp minced garlic
-1 Tbs chia seeds
-1 Tbs sunflower seeds
-Olive oil and balsamic vinegar to dress

What I'm missing: the ease of being able to grab a sandwich if I didn't have it together enough to make my lunch. I love sandwiches as a category of food in general.

Dinner:

The MIL made this excellent Squash, Red Lentil, and Chickpea stew when we were over there for New Years. As long as you omit the chicken it fits within the cleanse like a champ. The flavors are complex and the lentils are extremely filling.

What I'm missing: Egg sandwiches. Chicken. Pasta. Cheese. EVERYTHING. *sniffle*

Do you have any vegan, gluten-free, and sugar-free recipes you love? I've been collecting a few on one of my pinboards. I'd love to have more. Especially if they somehow involve chocolate.

How to survive life on Mars

2014-01-06T10:38:00.000-06:00

It's, like, really cold here in sweet home Minnesota. Colder than a witch's chesticles. Colder than an icicle frozen inside of snowdrift inside of the Grinch's heart pre-Whoville. Colder, apparently, than Mars.

Much of the state is closed today in response to these -50F windchills, including, thank Moses, my office, giving me the time to write a little guide to braving these frigid temps.

Step 1: Stop washing your hair.

Ain't nobody got the time for taking their feathers from wet to dry in weather like this. You'll probably catch cold/pneumonia/plague if you even try. If you need to be seen in public and you care about not looking like a sewer rat, you're going to need some dry shampoo. I've used a few different spray kinds, like Suave (turns my hair gray!), Dove (don't like the smell!), bumble+bumble (it's like brown spray paint!), and wasn't impressed. A Buzzfeed article led me to this potion from Brooklyn man store Fellow Barber. It's a bit messier since it's a powder, but it actually gives my hair the volume and clean appearance the other guys were promising. And the bergamot scent is quite pleasing!

Step 2: Take a detox bath.

Just because you aren't washing your hairs doesn't mean you should let the rest of you get rank. Draw yourself a steaming hot bath and add a half cup baking soda, a cup of Epsom salts, and a few sprinkles of an essential oil (I like lavender). Stew for 20 minutes. You'll emerge relaxed and quite warm.

I don't know how much I really buy the "detox" aspect of the bath, but hey. Worth a shot.

Step 3: Slather coconut oil all over yourself.

Coconut oil is so hot right now. Yesterday I told the mister I was going to rub it all over my face and see what happened. Here's what happened:

-It removed my makeup
-It left my skin very shiny and moist, which is better than dull and dry
-I smelled like a Mounds bar

This morning I put it on my chapped lips after reading this article, and it has totally relieved my Alligator Lip Syndrome.

Step 4: Warm your innards.

I discovered this hibiscus tea/ginger-clementine simple syrup concoction last winter. It produces a beverage that is both sweet and tart, and it's the prettiest color you ever did see. If you're local, you can get hibiscus tea at TeaSource. Or you could come over. I have it stockpiled.

Step 5: Put on your Katniss cowl.

You are sooooo sick of me talking about my damn Katniss cowl/huntress vest. I know. BUT LOOK AT IT IT'S SO COOL! AND I MADE IT! I MADE SOMETHING COOL! It's perfect for wearing on top of your shirt when you need extra warmth but don't want extra bulk under your arms. It's perfect for wearing under your coat. I love it the best.

Step 5: If you must go outside, get serious about it.

The MIL gave me this Patagonia down coat for Chrismukkah. It is like walking around in a sleeping bag. Highly recommended.

These Sorel Joan of Artic boots have made tromping out of doors as close to a pleasure as it could be. Before I got my sleeping bag coat, my feet were often the warmest part of my body.

Step 6: Don't even try to care what you look like.

When you're on Mars, it's better to be bundled than babely.

Stay warm out thar!

It's like having a stuffed animal that's real

2013-07-28T18:58:00.001-05:00

Remember way back five months ago when I desperately didn't want a dog and resorted to bargain witchery before I would consent to getting one?

Who could have guessed way back when that I would fall alarmingly in love with our canine, to the point where I would compose the following song about him:

I used to get annoyed with all the pet photos on my Instagram feed, and now I'm one of the worst offenders. Who can blame me when Freddy looks so darn good in every hat and/or scarf I put him in?

Exhibits A, B and C:

Having a pup isn't all anthropomorphizing and games. Following is a cold, hard look at the pros and cons of pet ownership that I've experienced in the past five months.

PROWLING THE NEIGHBORHOOD

PRO: We never would have met many of our neighbors if we didn't have to walk our beast past their abodes on a thrice-daily basis. The neighbor children love him, and when they see him coming an adorable chorus of, "Hi Freddy! Hi Freddy!" commences.

CON: Some of our older neighbors aren't quite as charmed by him. One woman banged on the inside of her living room window and yelled, "Seriously?!?!" when I let him pee at the edge of her yard.

FEELING FEELINGS

PRO: I cannot believe how much I love him. He is my princess monkey man dog face kitty.

CON: I'm constantly thinking about him when we're not together. I wonder who he's barking at and where he's taking a snooze and whether he's thinking about me, too.

SOCIAL LIFE

PRO: I'm never truly home alone anymore. Fred protects me from all the vicious bicycle-riding children and garbage trucks who dare pass by our property. Also, snuggling him is just the best. Especially when it's cold and you're watching a movie and all you want is a living, breathing fur coat on your lap.

CON: Fred is a very cute but very needy tether to the house. If I want to go out to happy hour, I can't just go; I need to make sure Matt can get home at a reasonable hour to take him out. No more spur-of-the-moment jaunts to Ibiza or Marrakesh, either. Plus, it turns out that he has a pretty bad case of the pukes every time we drive somewhere, meaning we have to be really committed before bringing him along.

DOG TALK

CON: Despite copious coaxing, Freddy refuses to speak English. I just want to know what he's thinking, and why he loves the taste of Noxema so much. I also would really love to teach him how to read so he could improve his mind while we're at work.

Progress Report: Bathroom, Office, Guest Room

2013-06-10T12:12:00.000-05:00

There's nothing like the prospect of a few dozen people coming over to goose the home improvements back into action. We'd stalled for the past few months on juicing up the joint, but last week, in between a bridal shower and a housewarming party, my mother-in-law offered to paint our guest bathroom and office while we were at work. All we had to do was buy the paint and do the prep work. It was a heckuva deal.

Our guest bathroom had been the color of a canoe pack I'd gotten for Matt for his birf. That color was called "olive drab." It wasn't really going with my pretty blue shower curtain, so we picked out a lovely dark teal.

Bathroom before:

Bathroom after:

I was very happy to find a permanent home for this pastel drawing I'd picked up circa '95 when I went to see the Chinese Opera in Beijing. This room is seldom used for showering purposes, so I wasn't too concerned about moisture damaging it.

I think this room is pretty well set. The only thing I would add would be a colorful valance above the window.

*****

The Office:

We first took a whack at the office back in February, when we added the evil Ikea furniture that left me with many wounds. Dude was feeling like he wanted a manlier color than the pale pink that had graced this former nursery, so we picked out a nice, calming dark blue instead. The new color was a perfect backdrop for the Van Gogh print his dad had given to us, as well as a photo of the Weisman Art Museum on the U of M campus (where we both went to school).

As a reminder, this is what we started with:

And here's what we have now:

Office To-Dos:

~~Paint~~
~~Buy a chair for the desk~~
Buy an area rug
~~Buy a lamp for the desk~~
~~Get some binders full of women so it looks real profesh~~
NEW: create frame collage above the bookcases... perhaps with family photos?

*****

Guest Bedroom

The last time we checked in on this room in February, Dude and I were living in the guest room as we waited for our new gigantic bed from Slumberland to arrive so we could inhabit the master suite. I feel like this room has come a long way and is nearing completion.

Again, here is the before:

And here's what we have now:

I had been thinking about painting this a different color, but I think the purple will stay for awhile. The pink chandelier will stay forever, obviously.

Our lovely realtor Lisa gifted us with a Pier1 gift card (thanks Lisa!) and with it I purchased this collage frame. I filled it with postcards I collected from around Europe and put a print that says "What a Wonderful World" in the middle. (When did I get this cheesy? Who can say?) I also added the heart made from book pages that Matt's cousin Kali made for our wedding. Say it with me now: OH FER CUTE.

Dude hadn't been a big fan of the frilly outlet covers that had been in the office (former nursery), so we did a switcheroo and put them in here instead.

Aunt Wendy sent us a lovely Grand Canyon painting that is now living in the opposite corner of the froufrou, and Ma gave me the nightstand (hand-me-down from our former rabbi's study) and lamp (Tar-zhay Boutique).

The MIL and I had a craft night this winter to mod-podge these maps onto canvases. The robot was a gift from my sweet friend Danielle for my robot-themed 25th birthday.

Guest Room To-Dos:

Re-paint (I don't wanna anymore!)
~~Get new bedding~~
~~Get lamp for night table~~
~~Hang map canvases so guests can pin where they're from~~
Make curtains
Refinish/paint furniture (No! I don't wanna! OK maybe later.)

*****

Next up is trying to figure out what color to paint the kitchen, which is the same olive drab that the guest bathroom used to be, and the hallway, which is a very pale purple. Onward!

Tea Party Dream Team

2013-06-02T19:47:00.002-05:00

I feel like tea parties are one of my core competencies, so when my girl Amanda asked me to be her Main Lady for her upcoming nups and requested a fancy tea party shower I said, "Yes. Yes, I can do that." Ma P-P volunteered her ample baking services and bam: Tea Party Dream Team.

I spent many an hour on Pinterest gathering conceptuals for the decor and grub and curated a fête fit for a princess bride (which Amanda is, natch). Wanna hear all about it? Read on, dear reader!

THE NOSH:

Here is our menu in full:
-Marie Antoinette tea from Ladurée (thanks for sending it, Nick and Kelly!)
-Honey-lavender lemonade
-Roast beef and horseradish sandwiches
-Smoked salmon and herb butter sandwiches
-Cucumber and cream cheese sandwiches
-Deviled eggs with caviar
-Dates stuffed with goat cheese and hazelnuts
-Pistachio macarons with salted caramel sauce
-Thumbprint cookies with raspberry jalapeno jelly (a Ma P-P specialty)
-Raspberry rose meringues
-Lemon lavender shortbread
-Mexican piggy cookies
-Lemon curd in phyllo cups with candied violets (Ma P-P said it was the best curd she's ever made. I will cosign.)

The spread.

Raspberry rose meringues

Lemon curd in phyllo shells with candied violets and raspberries

THE PRETTIES:

I don't dabble much in the floral arts due to ye olde pollen-averse sniffer, but I went to the Minneapolis Farmer's Market yesterday with a wish and a prayer and left with 48 roses and some mums. I follow a professional florist on Instagram so I felt like I kind of knew what I was doing. Sort of. This was the end result:

I made colorful tissue poufs and a construction paper garland to add more pops of princess color. To make the former, I aligned eight sheets of tissue paper and accordion folded them into one-inch segments. I wrapped wire around the middle, and then snipped designs on the end. I then carefully separated each layer to fill out the pouf. (Here's a toot from The Martha if you want more explanation.) For the garland, I used my 2-inch circle punch to cut out various colors of construction paper, and then lay them out in a straight line. I ran a glue stick down the center of each, and then pressed a length of string atop the glue. After adding additional glue to the tops and bottoms of the circles, I added a second batch of circles to the first so that the string was between two circle layers.


Tissue poufs

Construction paper garland

THE FAVOR FAVES

I was noodling around on Crate and Barrel's website, and found pretty little tins of Wedding Tea! Could you imagine a more perfect favor? I got the favor bags and adorable pink polka dot ribbon at JoAnn Fabrics and added little bits of leftover tissue paper from the poufs. Boom.

THE GAMES:

I was most nervous about the entertainment portion of the afternoon, as shower games are notoriously awful. Even a Google search of "Bridal shower games that don't suck" returns a truly pitiful selection of blah. I did three games/activities, one of which was fun, one of which was meh, and one of which hit it out of the park.

Fun: Celebrity Couples Guessing Game. I wrote the names of famous historical, political and fictional lovers on notecards and taped them to the guests' backs. (Some examples: Santa and Mrs. Claus, Sampson and Delilah, Barack and Michelle Obama, Madame Butterfly and Pinkerton.) Each person had to ask yes or no questions to try to figure out who they were. The kicker: Amanda's card said, "Whatever I ask, say no." Ha! Hijinks. Hilarity. The ice was broken and a grand time was had by all.

Meh: I tried to create a version of Catchphrase using true-life Amanda facts. It was clunky. After three questions I somewhat smoothly transitioned to gift-opening by saying that Amanda won and her prize was to open presents.

Out of the Park: I sent Amanda's intended a questionnaire about their relationship for him to fill out. The goal was to ask her the same questions before hearing his version. We decided to up the ante a bit by having him film his responses, which were funny, sweet and touching. He even made the Scandanavian bride leak a little emotion out of her eyes. Impressive.

SUCCESS

Aside from a brief Freddy Freedom Run at the tail end of festivities (pun), everything went off without a hitch. Most importantly, Amanda wore a truly gigantic hat.

Opera: A Think Piece

2013-04-23T19:11:00.000-05:00

Opera is one of those things you have to like if you're going to be fancy. It's like mink underwear. Quail egg omelets. Exclusive athletic clubs that provide bathrobes. Golf and/or tennis. Ostrich-bound books. All things you have to get used to when you decide to enjoy The Good Life.

If I have the choice between non-fancy and fancy, like if someone is presenting me a silver platter and removes the lid with a flourish and I have to choose between a lil' smokie and a mini escargot-oyster smoothie, you know I'm going to go for the delicate blend of balloon and snot.

Thus it was my destiny to dabble in the operatic arts, and when the opportunity arose to view final dress rehearsals of the Minnesota Opera's productions as an Official Blogger for the low, low price of free, I knew my time had come.

Turandot | Photo by Michael Daniel for the Minnesota Opera

My first production was the world premiere of Silent Night, which would go on to win a 2012 Pulitzer Prize (read my review here). I was enraptured. Enthralled. Gobsmacked. It was possibly the best performance I've witnessed of anything ever in the world. I cannot stress enough how much I loved the music and the costumes and the everything.

I was like, "Opera. Yes."

I enthusiastically requested tickets to the next performance, Werther, about an emo young man who falls in love with a woman promised to another and he just. can't. deal. so he shoots himself and sings himself sweetly to death (spoiler alert!).

I was like, "Opera. Wut??"

I had a hard time feeling any of the feelings I was supposed to be feeling for the characters. I was not one penny invested in them. There was zero chemistry between Werther and his supposed ladylove, and he just seemed to spend most of the time flailing around the set feeling sorry for himself. It was just so... dramatic.

Unable to reconcile my wildly disparate feelings for these two productions, I signed up for Lucia de Lammermoor. Reader, I can't even tell you what it was about. Because I have no idea. I was so not into it that I left at halftime. There was a lot of singing and moaning and being sad and unrequited-ness, I'm sure.

I still wasn't ready to give up, so I went to Madame Butterfly. This at least had a plot I could get into: It's the early 1900s, and an American named Pinkerton gets stationed in Japan, where he marries the beautiful Cio-Cio San (Butterfly). He's pretty cavalier about the whole thing, and despite declaring his love for her he takes off shortly after the wedding and bedding. She sticks around for three whole years for him to come back, all the while taking care of their love child. When he finally does show up, it's with his new wife. Burn. Adding major insult to major injury, they want to take her son back with them to 'Murica. Unsurprisingly (this is opera, after all), she kills herself. But just to be extra dramatic (again, opera), she does it in front of her blindfolded son, who is blithely waving an American flag for his father, the shocked and devastated Pinkerton, to see.

I found this one much more visually and musically appealing. I especially loved all the vibrato-heavy wails of "But-ter-flyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!" and "Pink-er-toneeeeeeeeeeeeeee!"

I was like, "Opera. OK."

Next up was Doubt, another world premiere, this one adapted from a play (which had already been adapted to a movie). We bloggers were invited to a pre-performance Q-and-A with playwright/screenwriter/librettist John Patrick Shanley. Triple-threat! I was especially excited to see this one because it starred Christine Brewer, a soprano I'd seen perform with the SPCO, as Sister Aloysius.

At this point in my opera-going career I was having an opera-stential crisis. What is opera, anyway? Like, is it a play with really pretty singing or is it pretty singing with a narrative structure and crazy production value? WHAT IS THE POINT OF OPERA?

Doubt did me no favors in that regard. Unlike a Puccini or Vivaldi classic, there was no show-stopping aria, no soul-shaking chorus singing about Truth. It was basically a play with people singing their lines. Things got especially weird when a character sang slang like "ain't" in full operatic glory. I mean, the singing was all very good singing. And the costumes and staging were as great as everything else the MN Opera lays its hands on. I'm just not sure what was added with the operafication.

I was like, "Opera, adieu."

One of my coworkers is an opera buff, and she convinced me to give the art form one last try with the season-ending Turandot. Turandot is a Persian princess who has no interest in marriage, and has declared that the only way she'd do the deed is if a prince can correctly answer three impossible riddles. If the prince fails, she will chop his head off. (This is not an empty threat; the stage is literally covered in blood from all the decapitating she's ordered.) Despite the carnage, princes from near and far are eager to take on this challenge. All fail until one day, a prince is like, "I got this." Everyone is like, "You're totally going to die. Just don't. Stop." And he's like, "I don't even care. She's so hot. Riddle me." Lo and behold, he gets all three right and Turandot flips out. The prince tells her that if she can find out his name by sunrise he'll let her kill him because that's just how much he loves her. After a long, futile night, dawn approaches. The prince approaches Turandot and is like, "I love you. Let's smooch." She's like, "Ugh! I hate you! I hate you! I... love you? OK I guess I love you now!" All the townsfolk come over and they're like, "What's his name? Did you figure out his name?" And she goes, "His name is LOVE."

*Mic drop*

I was like, "Opera, I will begrudgingly let you back into my life on a case-by-case basis."

Everything delicious in my life comes from pinterest: Part II

2013-04-09T12:58:00.000-05:00

Quinoa Breafast Bowl:

It's quinoa! Everyone's favorite hippie whole protein ancient grain! I made a cup's worth of quinoa yesterday morning before work, and have been putting a few spoonfuls of that in a tupperware along with some yogurt, a smattering of sunflower seeds, a half-dozen blackberries, a sprinkling of sliced almonds, a schmiglit of torn mint leaves and four drizzles of honey. It's delicious, filling, and happy. Change your face.

Crockpot Chicken Tikka Masala:

CTM is my go-to order when I go to Indian restaurants. This recipe was super easy, and I already had most of the ingredients in my fridge or pantry. It only needs fourish hours in the crockpot, which makes it perfect for those Sunday afternoons when you finally get around to thinking about dinner at about 3:00 and want the ease of a crockpot but don't have 8-10 dang hours. It's a tad on the spicy side for my delicate Minnesotan palate, so I think if I made it again I'd cut down on the cayenne. I would also not forget to pick up some garlic naan from Trader Joe's because #nom.

Sesame Salmon with Green Onions and Lemon:

I'm afraid of cooking fish. There was this one time when I was a pauper in Portland and I decided to splurge on some salmon. I had no idea how to tell if it was done, and I took it out of the oven far before its time. It was very undercooked, but I kept on eating it because I'd spent so much money on it and I was so, so poor. Then I didn't feel so well. This recipe, my friends, is way more fool-proof. And easier. And yummy and healthy and all that. Salmon continues to be expensive.

Italian Garlic Rosemary Spiced Nuts:

I made these little guys for our housewarming party a few weeks ago. I got all the nuts from the bulk section at Lunds. This recipe makes quite a bit, so I think you could safely cut it in half and save yourself some pennies. Several people deemed the nuts "addictive," but the only thing I'm addicted to is chapstick so I don't worry about it.

Black Raspberry Brie Bites:

One of my coworkers shared this recipe and then I went and found it on Pinterest so I'm slightly cheating. I also made this for the housewarming and I can guarantee that it will impress all your friends and shame your enemies. A fair number of my puff pastry packets exploded in the oven, but no one even cared. They look cool, they taste great and that's all I have to say about that.

Wanderlusting

2013-03-17T11:30:00.000-05:00

We're in that icky stage of winter where it just drags on and on and you feel like you'll never see green grass again. Each new forecast of snow and bitter cold feels like a personal insult. I'm sick of my bulky winter cloak. I'm done with the cardboard-tasting tomatoes. All I want is to get on a plane and see new things and hear new sounds and smell new smells and eat the most delicious fresh produce ever.

I've been torturing myself with staring at these Frenchy photos from my trip last August, which provide a double-whammy of longing for both gallivanting and summer-ing. Only three months and two weeks until my next day off...

Ma P-P's Jewish Penicillin

2013-03-14T12:08:00.000-05:00

Passover's coming up. This is the holiday where everything delicious (i.e. carby) is banned for a week. I have a history of fainting and/or becoming unbearable to be around during these eight sundowns, to the point where my coworker made note of the dates in her calendar so she knows not to get up in my grill.

Much of my crabbiness stems from feeling like there's nothing I can eat, and thus I don't eat and thus my blood sugar drops and thus the fainting and the biting off of people's heads.

This isn't true though; unlike people on the Paleo diet I don't have to eat like a dinosaur. I could snack on a sugar packet. Or a butter sandwich without the bread. SO MANY OPTIONS.

One of my favorites is my mom's matzo ball soup. In addition to being K for P (Kosher for Passover), it has mysterious healing powers. In my experience, this magic potion has the ability to cure at least 97.3% of what ails you. (The remaining 2.7% can be cured with a few Freddy snuggles.)

Ma P-P happened to be in town this weekend, and when we got the news that a very dear girl in our lives had been admitted to the hospital, our natural inclination was to set to work making matzo ball soup and other goodies to get her back up to snuff.

Without further ado, here is the recipe for Ma P-P's Jewish Penicillin:

1 cut-up chicken, plus an extra thigh and leg
1 sweet potato, peeled and cut into chunks
2 leeks, cleaned, root side sliced off. Be careful--these guys can be seriously muddy. Use the whole leek--white and green parts.
2 carrots, scraped and chunked. Remember, you will use these for the soup later on--cut into one- or two-inch chunks.
1 whole onion, paper skin removed, scored.
1 small turnip, peeled and chunked.
2 parsnips, peeled and chunked.
fresh dill (enough for the preparation of the broth and then later as garnish)

fresh parsley for broth
salt, pepper to taste
Matzo ball soup mix

Wash and dry chicken parts, place in stock pot and cover with cold water. Bring to a boil. Skim off scum. Add the broth powder from the chicken soup mix. Stir well. Add veggies and herbs. Bring to a boil and then simmer for a few hours.

Make matzo balls and keep in fridge until ready to cook.

After soup is finished, strain off all the meat and veggies, reserving carrots. Following the instructions on the package, drop the matzah balls into the broth, cover, and boil.

Slice carrots into coin shaped pieces and add to broth. Add dill for garnish.

A bonus is that you can eat the mushy glop you used to make the broth for days afterwards. It's especially great if you have no teeth.

Progress report: Living Room, Bedroom and Bookcases

2013-03-10T20:08:00.000-05:00

Our week has closely mirrored that of Justin Bieber's, except that instead of dealing with Lil' Twist crashing an expensive car, the ire of Britain's parents after starting concerts many hours late, and paparazzi picking fights with us, we dealt with ice dams, a sick dog, and a gas leak. Unlike the Biebs, however, we do not make an estimated $6,500/hr. Mint is having a cow.

Havoc aside, we've been quite busy making the hizzy not quite so bare. The couch, chair, and and bed we ordered from Slumberland arrived last week. allowing us to retire the all-purpose air mattress. The living room now actually looks like a place where people live, and not a site where vagrants have decided to set up camp. Please enjoy the following pics in which Dude is studiously ignoring me and Freddy is photo-bombing like a boss.

Living Room To-Dos:

~~Buy a couch~~
~~Buy armchairs~~
Buy an area rug
~~Mount the TV above the fireplace~~
~~Make a painting/picture mural above the couch~~
Make curtains

*****

We got our new Posturpedic mattress along with the couch and a chair, but the foundation didn't fit around the tight corners going up the stairway to the master suite. We floor-slept for another week while we waited for them to deliver a lower-profile model. This mattress is a dream. A life-changer. As long as you don't have a snuggly puppy hacking up a lung in the middle of the night, you will sleep through the night like a baby.

Bedroom to-dos:

Paint an accent wall
Get new lampshades/ spray paint bases
Get a desk and/or chair for the half-wall by the stairs
Get an area rug

*****

Last night I was seized by the need to ROY-G-BIV our bookcases. This was right around the time I called the gas company to check out the odor I'd smelled near the dryer. If we're going to get all psychological, I was clearly desperate to assert some control over our living space. Hence: RAINBOWS!

Here is your lesson of the day: if you think you smell gas, call the gas company right away. The benefits are many:

The visit is free. There's no reason not to put safety first, friends.
If you call at 8 on a Saturday night, you get to hear the night shift guy's many, many war stories. He might be incredibly racist. He might give you lots of tips on what all the pipes in your basement are for. The morning after he leaves you might discover a mysterious liquid spilled on your washer. These are just a few of the examples of things that can happen.
The stress of imagining the death by explosion you narrowly avoided can be funneled into some really valuable home projects.

Now that the living room, kitchen, guest room and master are more or less acceptable, I will be focusing my energies on our pretty pink office and the basement, where we've been stashing all the stuff I don't know where to put yet.

You can come visit now. We have at least four places for you to sit.

Shakshuka

2013-03-08T15:38:00.000-06:00

I've had Israel on the brain for awhile now. Brother Bear went there for a conference in December, and I used the occasion to regale him of all the delectable breakfasts I had scarfed up when I went on a trip for college journalists circa 2007. Everything else I stuffed down my gullet was also quite excellent, but the breakfasts at our hotel in Jerusalem were just insanely fresh and good. Fish. Cheeses. Fruit. Toubouleh. Oy!

I've been seeing Kat's instagrammed pics from her Birthright trip to the motherland last month, and my girl Lo returned just days ago from the Land of Milk and Honey. The subsequent social media blitz of camels and deserts and holies of holy set my heart a-achin'.

Then I happened upon Kat's blog entry on her shakshuka foray, and came across David Lebovitz's version but days later. The universe was clearly telling me I needed to make this spicy tomato-and-eggs dish, stat.

Here's the recipe from David's blog, which he adapted from Jerusalem by Yotam Ottolenghi and Sami Tamimi and Secrets of the Best Chefs by Adam Roberts. Smitten Kitchen also has a version on her site. You should probably make different versions of this every day. Because if you can't get yourself to the other side of the world, you have to bring the other side of the world to you.

2 tablespoons olive oil
1 medium onion, peeled and diced
3 cloves garlic, peeled and thinly sliced
1/2 – 1 chile pepper (or to taste), stemmed, sliced in half and deseeded, finely diced/minced
1 1/2 teaspoons salt
1 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper
1 teaspoon paprika, smoked or sweet
1 teaspoon caraway seeds, crushed
1 teaspoon cumin seeds, crushed, or 3/4 teaspoon ground cumin
1/2 teaspoon turmeric
2 pounds (1kg) ripe tomatoes, cored and diced, or two 14-ounce cans of diced or crushed tomatoes
2 tablespoons tomato paste
2 teaspoons honey
1 teaspoon red wine or cider vinegar
1 cup (20g) loosely packed greens, such as radish greens, watercress, kale, Swiss chard, or spinach, coarsely chopped
4 ounces (about 1 cup, 115g) feta cheese, cut in generous, bite-sized cubes
4 to 6 eggs

1. In a wide skillet, heat the olive oil over medium high heat. Add the onions and the garlic and cook for 5 minutes, until soft and wilted. Add the chile pepper, the salt, pepper, and spices. Cook for a minute, stirring constantly, to release their fragrance.

2. Add the fresh or canned tomatoes, tomato paste, honey, and vinegar, reduce the heat to medium, and cook for 12 to 15 minutes, or until the sauce has thickened somewhat but is still loose enough so that when you shake the pan it sloshes around. (Fresh tomatoes may take a little longer to cook than canned.) Stir in the chopped greens.

3. If you want to finish the Shakshuka on the stovetop, turn off the heat and press the cubes of feta into the tomato sauce. With the back of a spoon, make 6 indentations in the sauce. Crack an egg into each indentation, then drag a spatula gently through the egg whites so it mingles a bit with the tomato sauce, being careful not to disturb the yolks.
Turn the heat back on so the sauce is at a gentle simmer, and cook for about 10 minutes, taking some of the tomato sauce and basting the egg whites from time-to-time. Cover, and cook 3 to 5 minutes, until the eggs are cooked to your liking.

4. To finish them individually, preheat the oven to 375ºF (180ºC.) Divide the sauce into 6 baking dishes and press the feta cubes into the sauce. Set the baking dishes on a baking sheet, make an indentation in each, and crack and egg into the center. Bake until the eggs are cooked to your liking, basting the whites with some of the sauce midway during baking, which will take anywhere from 10 to 15 minutes – but begin checking them sooner to get them just right. If the yolks begin to get a little firm on top before the whites are cooked, drape a sheet of foil over them, but avoid having it touch the yolks.
Serve with lots of crusty bread for scraping up the sauce.

February: The Month Mint Wouldn't Stop Yelling at Me

2013-03-02T17:07:00.001-06:00

Do you guys use Mint? It's a website and app that let you budget and track your spending. If Mint doesn't think you're making very good decisions, like incurring an ATM fee or spending $12 at coffee shops for the month when you specifically told it you were only going to spend $10, you'll receive an email alert to guilt you into being more responsible.

Sometimes Mint nags you so much that you have to ignore it or risk constantly feeling like a failure of a human.

Mint totally hated me in February. I would get emails that were like, "You just spent tens of thousands of dollars on housing! You usually spend $600. What's wrong with you?!?! Don't go buying any furniture now. Don't do it. I'm serious. Don-- DAG NABIT!"

"Why on earth are you spending money on pets??? Have I taught you nothing???"

"Do you FREAKING REALIZE that you just spent $4 more on groceries than you said you would?! You are going to end up a homeless pauper, with nothing to your name, no one to love and nowhere to live. IDIOT."

You know what, Master Mint? #Hidontevencurr. These groceries are delicious. This house is a palace. And this dog, now officially named Ellis Alfred Swearengen, is the coolest sentient being on the planet. I can save money when I'm dead.

This Damn Dog Stole My Heart

2013-02-27T20:44:00.001-06:00

Internet, meet Dino.

Dino is a 4.5-year-old Pomeranian mix. He has little wormies in his heart. But if I was a worm I'd want to be in his heart too.

We met him at the Golden Valley Humane Society. One of the volunteers hooked a leash to his collar and led him to a friendship room so we could get to know him. The whole walk over he kept trying to paw off his snout restraint. It was adorable.

After thoroughly investigating all the alien smells, he felt like maybe it was OK for us to pet him. He had a hard time looking us in the eye but slumped to the floor and nearly fell asleep while Matt pet his very soft silky puppy fur. Sometimes he looked up at us like this and we died a little bit inside:

Matt scooted back toward the door and Dino was all like, "No no no! More!" and he crawled right into Matt's lap and begged us to be his best friends for ever and always.

We said OK.

Dino (which is apparently pronounced /DEE-no/ and not /DY-no/ as I had assumed) is coming home with us tomorrow and needs a new name. Here are some of our ideas:

Pawlie
Cat
Francois
Barry
Silly
Pickle
Photocopier
Porcelain Cup
Kleenex
Pawnee
Ron Swanson
Mr. Neil Young
The Distinguished Senator from Mississippi
Willenium
Sinkhole
Lamb Chop
Snerf
America
Pamplemousse
Theodore/Teddy (Graham)
Rinkarooroobooboobear
Crinkle
Cruckle

Thoughts?

Sigh... Young Amour: Part 2

2013-02-26T17:43:00.000-06:00

One of my fellow English teachers from Franceland Class of '11 sent over a priceless gift today. Her former students have created a Facebook page devoted to gossip and some very interesting anonymous love poetry (according to their mission statement they are looking for students to "declare their flame" or "give us crusty bits of gossip.") Below are translations from French by yours truly of some of the best.

*****

For you, handsome little brunet, I send you a thought
Do you remember last year, a few minutes were enough for us
Like the first letter of your first name, I dream of it still
Of your mouth on mine, of our silhouettes that make one
It was in early morning, you offered me a divine pleasure
Know that I haven't forgotten you, I still can't believe it
That you and me, perhaps, we could take up where we left off
--From a former student of the high school, to a student in 11th grade

*****

Oh you who lights up my days
With your cartoon nickname
I liked so much
The time when you kissed me
Even if you gave in return
A potato in the nose*
Oh my little slip of a woman
You think of me as an ass (kind of like one of your cinematic comrades)
Even if one equates me with a green man*
I wrote you this poem to confess
That I have loved you since last Saturday
Since I say you jiggling
After drinking a bit too much alcoholic beverages

*I may be horribly mistranslating an idiom here

*****

In our history, our connection have dissolved to a point where today you hate me.
I never dared to tell you this in 10th grade, but today I have a profound desire to snuggle my head between your breasts!
Oh you and your long and curly hair make my heart pulse, when I run into you in the foyer, I would really love to kiss you so languidly

Read Part 1 of Sigh... Young Amour here.

Bus stories

2013-02-21T08:56:00.000-06:00

My old bus to work had this guy name George who would get on about 5 minutes into my ride. He was probably in his late 70s, and always had a newspaper and a shock of pomaded white hair that stuck up in the back. The moment he got on he would start regaling the driver in an outside voice with everything that was wrong in the world. Most of his sentences either started or ended with "I tell ya..." and he had lots of theories about President Obama. Like how the reason he wants to take all our guns away is so he can round up all the Jews and send them to Siberia without any citizen resistance.

George was pretty sure most people were out to fleece him most of the time. He was also pretty sure our country and our world was going to hell in a handbasket and would tell anyone who would listen. Everyone on the bus wanted to listen; George was pretty sure of that.

I always wondered if George had an actual destination in downtown or if riding the bus was what he did to socialize.

The bus driver of my old bus to work would respond to George, but Driver never acknowledged my "Good morning!" or my friendly smile or my "Thank you!" when I got off. He just stared at me. Poker-faced. When I returned from France with a broken foot, I hobbled up to the bus with my walking boot and my crutches and looked up at him hopefully, expecting him to lower the ramp. Instead he regarded me icily. I gritted my teeth and hopped up the steps as best I could.

My old bus to work had a stop across the street from a Salvation Army center, which brought an infusion of colorful characters for the last six minutes of the ride. One time a couple of guys had been fighting at the stop, and when the bus arrived one of them managed to punch the other into the bus while Driver yelled, "Hey! Hey! Hey!" but did nothing to stop it. We had to sit there for another 10 minutes post-altercation while he phoned in a report. I don't think George was there that day.

There is nothing interesting about my new bus to work.

Progress Report: Living Room, Guest Room, Office

2013-02-18T16:21:00.000-06:00

Since we closed on the hizzy a week and a half ago, we've been in a near constant state of schlepping, organizing and improving upon. I have today off, and I spent a good portion of my morning ROY-G-BIV'ing my dresses and Matt's shirts, if that gives you any indication of the nesting bug that has gripped my very soul.

We're nowhere near completion, but the masses have cried out for photographic evidence of our housedom, and to them I say: I hear you clucking, big chickens.

Let us start in the living room, which until Saturday doubled as our sleeping quarters with the help of an outrageously comfortable air mattress on loan from Matt's parentals. We still have quite a way go to here, but we've painted it in the soothing tones of April Mist (and by we I mean I taped everything and MIL came over while we were at work and did the rest) and purchased a cute little lamp from Target.

Here's the before picture, from the previous owners:

And here's what it looks like now:

Living Room To-Dos:

Buy a couch
Buy armchairs
Buy an area rug
Mount the TV above the fireplace
Make a painting/picture mural above the couch
Make curtains

*****

On Saturday we got a moving van and picked up our furniture from the apartment, and thus we were able to sleep in an honest-to-goodness bed once more. The previous owners had two little girls, the older of whom was named Sofia and had a purple princess room with a princess princess princess pink chandelier. We decided this would be our guest room, and since the queen box spring won't make it around the tight corners to the master suite upstairs, our bed is parked here for now. We definitely need to leave the chandy up because it's awesome, but the purple's got to go. Depending one the color scheme we go for, I might want to refinish the furniture and paint it a different color.

Before :

This is how I know her name is Sofia, BTW; it's not because I'm a master creeper. The paint color in that picture is closer to real life to mine:

Guest Room To-Dos:

Re-paint
Get new bedding
Get lamp for night table
Hang map canvases so guests can pin where they're from
Make curtains
Refinish/paint furniture

*****

I spent a good chunk of the weekend building things with my bare hands. The Ikea bookcases we bought were snap and a half, but this desk. My god, this desk. It nearly killed me. I'm spectacularly bad at all things that involve hand-eye coordination, and you should probably put hammering at the top of that list. I'm pretty durn lucky not to be writing this from the hospital.

Anyhow. This room had been used as a nursery, but we'll be using it as a home office. Depending on how ambitious we get, we'll probably be doing away with the pale pink walls and the frou frou switch plates, but I continue to find them charming.

Here's a before (again, their fancy real estate photography does a better job picking up the true paint color):

And here is the evil Ikea furniture that I'm going to have to not look at for awhile because we're in a fight:

Office To-Dos:

Paint
Buy a chair for the desk
Buy an area rug
Buy a lamp for the desk
Get some binders full of women so it looks real profesh

*****

Sometime this week I'll show you my incredibly organized kitchen cupboards and the book explosion that happened in the basement. Maybe I'll even give you a peek at the ROY-G-BIV'ed closets. If you're good.

On learning to compromise

2013-02-16T08:21:00.001-06:00

I was having lunch with Anna, telling her about my Woes of the Week.

"He wants a sectional," I said. "A big, fatty, leather sectional. It will totally overwhelm the space. And I stick to leather in the summer. If there's one thing I know, it's that I didn't buy a house just to stick to the gigantic leather couch in the summer."

This wasn't the only design disagreement we'd been having. I pinned long and hard to come up with a color scheme I was totally in love with for what I'm calling Salon Neenuh. It involves light blue-green walls, neutral fabric furniture and blue and coral accents. He would prefer dark colors, like gray and brown and navy.

This really shouldn't surprise me any more, after nearly six years of being together. I first learned of our taste gulf when we were registering for wedding presents, and I was head over heels for a teal china pattern with BIRDS on it, and he wanted white with a single silver circle. I wanted the bold apple green mixer and he was adamant that we stick to the classic red or white. I wanted bright-bright-bright linens and he wanted brown. I married a monster.

And, I told Anna, he's desperate for a dog. I ticked off the reasons I don't want one:

The vet bills. Dogs inevitably get ring worm and then cancer and then you have to pay for dog chemo and we just bought a house and how could we possibly afford that.
The poop. Once you buy a dog you are then responsible for every piece of poop that comes out of its body.
The shedding. I just spent an entire evening vacuum up the little white hairs the previous owners' best friend left EVERYWHERE-- like, they were even in the bathtub.
The noise. What if Pup decides my brother smells weird and it yaps its head off every time he comes over? Sam is related by blood (at least that's what we've been told); I can't just ban him from our house.
The jealousy. What if we have a baby and then the dog gets jealous because we're not giving it enough attention and then it climbs into baby's crib and sits on baby's face AND KILLS OUR BABY?
The poop. What if it's a fraidy-dog and I drop something because dropsy and it makes a loud noise and then the dog poops itself on our huge leather sectional?

Anna patiently refuted all my points and told me that I would love being a pet mama and that it would be great practice for being a real mama and that she would be our dog-sitter forever and always amen. And then she had a stroke of genius. I care about the furniture. Matt cares about the dog. I should use dog ownership as a bargaining chip to get him to cede decision-making capabilities.

Reader, that's what I did. And it totally worked. I look forward to inviting you to our humble abode this summer, where the yard will be poop-filled and the couches will be stick-free.

Home Wish List

2012-10-20T16:09:00.001-05:00

Must have:
-Three bedrooms
-Two bathrooms
-Medium back yard
-Garage
-Finished basement
-New windows

Would like to have:
-Turrets
-Stained glass windows in every room
-Secret passages
-Treehouse
-Absurd amount of cupboard space in the kitchen (like enough to store several small children in (for hide and seek purposes))
-Window seats
-Treasures from times gone by hidden away in the attic
-Claw-foot bathtub

Must not have:*
-Vagrant men who pee in the backyard
-Ripped-out crown molding
-Haunted basement/attic
-A pervasive odor of cat pee
-Cast iron boiler circa 1903
-A store called "Liquor Barrel" around the corner

*All things present in houses we looked at today

Things people will no longer say to me

2012-09-13T12:25:00.001-05:00

Das Boot: 8/14/12-9/12/12

What'd you do?
You should be more careful!
Bet you won't be dancing for awhile!
Were you dancing too much?
You should stop kicking your husband so hard!
(Stare)
Nice boot!
Your shoes don't match!
Look at your peg leg!
(Stare)
You broke it in Paris? I bet there's a good story behind that!
At least it happened on the last day of your trip and not the first day!
At least it didn't happen in winter!
(Stare)
(Laugh)
(Stare)
Does it hurt?
Are you on drugs?
Can you drive?
(Stare)
I broke my foot once. It was way worse.
I broke my arm once.
You're going to get arthritis!

I'd like to thank the people of Paris, Icelandair Flights 543 and 657, Louisville and, most of all, Saint Paul for the all their concern during the past month. You can stop staring at me now.

Ways I wish I'd broken my foot

2012-08-18T19:26:00.001-05:00

I broke my foot in Paris.

That line, which I've repeated ad naseum all week in response to the countless queries of "Wha hoppon?", would lead you to believe there's a really good story behind it. There isn't. There's basically no reason for me to have broken my foot. I was stepping off a sidewalk and my foot slipped. C'est tout.

Here's what I wish I could say:

I was chasing pigeons
I slipped in dog merde. Damn French people who don't clean up after their dogs...
I was helping an old blind man cross the street à la Amélie and a speeding moped ran me over
I was attacked near Pigalle and stomped on my aggressor's steel-booted instep like I learned in self-defense
I was so inspired by the American Women's Gymastics Team's success that I decided to cartwheel down the Champs de Mars
I was running to catch a train in the métro and the door closed on my hoof
I was taking one of my signature jumping-in-front-of-monument pictures

Le sigh.

You'll come for the Troglodytes but you'll stay for the geese

2012-07-08T11:14:00.000-05:00

French websites seldom disappoint. On the English translations of even classy hotel sites, you'll often find delightful turns of phrase like:

For a little break between all those sights seeing, why not relaxing with a wellness stay ?... To that we propose you a stay for two, including a double room in the Manor with breakfasts and a massage package (for 2 hours) at the Jardin de Valentine at the Jardin de Valentine, beauty center in the heart of Amboise (15 min. walk).

Why not relaxing, I demand you? Propose me all you got. I'll takes it.

A wonderful gem I found yesterday was the site for the Troglodyte village outside of Saumur. On the photos and videos page, there were several short videos that one would think would take one on a tour of the cave dwellers' lair. But mostly, there is this. And this. And then there's this one, which started off so promising...

I just conquered the Loire

2012-07-06T14:23:00.000-05:00

I'm going back to Franceland in but four short weeks, and it wasn't until yesterday that my maniacal planning tendencies kicked in. I tend toward exhaustive, pages-long itineraries that cover every option and ticket price for anything you might find interesting in a specific city, complete with a to-the-minute train timetable.

The plan for next month is that take the train from Paris to Digoin immediately after I arrive, and the next day I'll enjoy the delights of the Escargot Festival. Amanda gets in two days later, and we will go wine-tasting and gourmet dinner-eating to our hearts' delight. After four days and five nights of glorious Diggy, we will make our way to the Loire Valley region and all its pretty pretty princess chateaux, then Monet's gardens in Giverny, then Paris, then home.

That's where I got stuck. There was not a good way to see everything sans voiture, and I was at my wits' end on how to squeeze in a trip to see troglodyte awesomeness in Saumur. I spent hours on the SNCF website testing the viability of various routes and home bases. This afternoon I finally settled upon the Most Perfect Itinerary. Feast your eyes, francophiles:

WEDNESDAY: DIGOIN-->AMBOISE-->CHENONCEAUX

Chateau Royal d'Amboise

Chateau de Clos Luce (final home of Leonardo da Vinci)

Chateau de Chenonceau

WEDNESDAY: AMBOISE-->SAUMUR

Chateau de Saumur

Musée du Champignon

Troglodyte home

FRIDAY: AMBOISE-->BLOIS-->CHAMBORD-->CHEVERNY-->VERNON

Chambord

Cheverny

SATURDAY: VERNON-->GIVERNY-->PARIS

Giverny

Everything delicious in my life comes from Pinterest

2012-04-22T08:17:00.001-05:00

There are a few technological advances in this world that I can say have legitimately changed my life. One is digital cameras. Another is Netflix streaming. The latest, and greatest, is Pinterest.

Lots of people I follow use it to plan their weddings or babies' birthdays or what their next home decor project should be. I mostly use it to plan what goes into my mouth.

Exhibits A and B are the two dishes I assembled at a raucous barbecue chez Parsley last night: Fig Gorgonzola Honey Tartines and Grilled Peach Salad with Mozzarella and Arugula. Nom factor: through the roof. Here's some Instagrammed photographic evidence:

In no particular order, here are some other delicious dishes that have graced my table recently:

Springtime Honey Garlic Roast Chicken Skillet:

With this guy you roast entire heads of garlic and then mush it up with honey for a Flavor Paste of the Gods to schmear on your chicken and veggies. Plus, the ingredients only came to around $20, and we ate it for at least six meals. Score.

The Loaded Bowl:

Dude and I are still trying valiantly to battle the Marriage Fifteen, and this dish is a nice low-cal but filling option. Just don't eat it for lunch on a day where you have important meetings, if you know what I mean...

Spicy Roasted Broccolini Quinoia Salad:

My coworkers are crazy about the quinoia these days, and this dish was my first foray into that trendy grain. The lemony roasted and slightly spicy broccolini are what really make this sing. I'm drooling a little bit right now. So grood.

Rosemary Olive Oil Cake:

I made this for a Downton Abbey viewing party and it was just perfection on a plate. The rosemary provides an unusual but pleasant element, and the pinch of salt goes a long way in making this an almost-savory delight. Perfect for tea parties, brunches, and viewings of House-In-A-Teacup-type shows.

Please share with the class, Francey Pantsers: what are your favorite new delicacies, pinned or otherwise?