Fraternal Thoughts

The Best of Us

noreply@blogger.com (John Shertzer) — Wed, 25 Jan 2012 13:50:00 +0000

When I first landed in Ames, Iowa in 2000 to begin my Masters degree in Higher Education, a couple of life-changing events happened almost immediately. First, I met the woman to whom I will soon be married for 10 years. Second, Brian Tenclinger invited me to help advise Iowa State Dance Marathon.

I was a Dance Marathon participant as an undergraduate at Miami, but at the time it was a fairly minor event on that campus. At Iowa State, it had positioned itself as among the biggest campus organizations and programs. The decision to help advise them was at first a decision to bolster my fledgling resume. It didn’t take too long to figure out that it was absolutely a privilege and an honor.

Brian soon left Iowa State, and I took over full advisorship. I was young and made some mistakes, but the students I worked with were the best kind of teachers – understanding. Together we helped raise each other to higher levels of excellence. To this day, they are still the best undergraduates I have ever worked with.

Dance Marathons exist all over the country. The very first Dance Marathon was started at Penn State in 1973 by the campus Interfraternity Council. That year, the participants raised $2,136. Last year, they raised $9.5 million. Other Dance Marathons include Indiana University ($1.8 million in 2011), the University of Iowa ($1.2 million in 2011), and Northwestern University ($1 million in 2011). Most events raise money for the Children’s Miracle Network, but not all. Most also were started and built up by fraternity and sorority students. While many have broadened themselves to be campus-wide, fraternity and sorority members still lead the way. There are other similar events that seem to have the same kind of power - such as the Up til Dawn program through St. Jude Children's Research Hospital.

Dance Marathon may be the ideal college philanthropy, for the following reasons:

It combines fundraising with hands-on service experiences. Dancers raise money for young children in need, and then spend time with them, providing them the experience of a lifetime.
There is serious fundraising. This isn’t a penny war. It looks and feels like a charity event you would find in the biggest city.
It teaches leadership. There are lots of moving parts (literally), a huge need for organization and teamwork, and the stakes are high.
It’s a sincerely compassionate cause. It supports children and their families during their darkest times. And because Children’s Miracle Network hospitals exist all over the country, there is a good chance you can find one close to campus, thereby building a campus/community connection.
It’s tough. This is a not a teeter-totter-a-thon. The actual event is grueling, both physically and emotionally. In a world where people feel that wearing an awareness ribbon is enough, Dance Marathon shows participants that working hard for a good cause is worth it.
It’s about kids. Because of that, it can warm the coldest heart and make even the most self-centered individual devote themselves to a lifetime of service.
It’s an absolute blast. Music, dancing, food, bright colors, kids to play with – what’s not to love?

I still remember the kids I met through the program. I was a bit naïve about childhood illnesses, and like many, would turn away when I saw a kid in a wheelchair, with burns on his face, or deformities in his body. But after they let me into their lives, I now look them squarely in the eye and with a smile a mile wide. After all, kids with their courage deserve every smile they can get.

When my wife and I decided to get married in Ames, circumstances caused the date of our wedding to be in conflict with that year’s Dance Marathon. I was disappointed, but of course ecstatic about the wedding. Other advisors took over, and the event was a tremendous success. My wife surprised me by inviting 20 of the student leaders I had worked with to sneak away to our reception and do the morale dance for us. We surprised them in turn by showing up after our wedding, in gown and tux, to cheer them on. That's how much it grabs your heart.

Iowa State Dance Marathon celebrated 15 years of success with their event this past weekend. A huge undergraduate and alumni effort resulted in the biggest year ever for the program – by a mile. $380,000 is going to the Children’s Hospital in Iowa City. I would have traded almost anything to be standing in that Great Hall to listen to the roar of 800 students – members of a so-called selfish generation – as those numbers were revealed. Over the next few months, those cheers will be joined by participants across the land, as they dance for kids who sometimes struggle to walk.

I remember Caleb, a child who had barely survived a horrific car crash, standing on stage with scars on his head, but not on his soul. With hundreds of college students standing in silence with baited breath, Caleb belted out the most beautiful version of “This Little Light of Mine” I had ever heard.

A few fraternity and sorority students, many years ago, created Dance Marathon. And Dance Marathon has created opportunities for kids like Caleb to sing. And dance. And be loved by their “college friends.” It’s the perfect philanthropy.

It’s the best of us.

For more information on Dance Marathon, visit this website: http://dancemarathon.childrensmiraclenetworkhospitals.org/.

Resolutions Revised

noreply@blogger.com (John Shertzer) — Mon, 09 Jan 2012 02:32:00 +0000

~~Focus on better priorities.~~

   Focus on different priorities.
      Spend more time with family.
          Call mom more often.

Focus more on my fraternity.

~~Win the chapter of the year award.~~
Earn the chapter of the year award.

~~Have better chapter meetings.~~

~~Have shorter chapter meetings.~~
Have more relevant chapter meetings.

~~Do 100 service hours.~~

~~Do 200 service hours.~~

~~Do 300 service hours.~~

Do as much service as we can - as often as possible.

~~Be more like that fraternity across the street.~~
Be more like that fraternity our founders intended.

~~Recruit a lot more members.~~

   ~~Stop focusing on quantity, and start focusing on quality.~~
       Wait.We can have both.

~~Memorize the creed.~~
    Internalize the creed.

Win Greek Week. Sure, why not.

~~Get more guys to live in the house.~~
   Make the house more of a home.

~~Redefine my fraternity’s purpose.~~
    Rediscover my fraternity’s purpose.

~~Hang out with my brothers more.~~
    Learn something new and profound about each of my brothers.

~~Be a better brother.~~

~~Be the best brother that I can be.~~
Just listen more.

~~Stop being a competitive jerk and caring so much about winning.~~
Keep being competitive and care more about winning. Just stop being a jerk.

~~Be better about writing on friends’ Facebook walls.~~
Invest in a jumbo pack of greeting cards and a good ballpoint pen.

~~Spend more time on totalfratmove.com~~.
    It's time to grow up.

~~Party more.~~
    Contribute more.

~~Be a better member.~~
    Be a stronger leader.

~~Learn to be more satisfied.~~

~~Learn to be more comfortable.~~

~~Leave a legacy.~~
    Do something significant that impacts others.

~~Give my soul to my fraternity~~ .
    Give my time and talents to my fraternity. Save my soul for myself.

Seek ~~happiness~~ fulfillment.

Seek ~~glory~~ respect.

Be ~~recognized~~ productive.

~~Spend more time relaxing.~~ I can do that when I’m dead.

~~Make this a year to remember.~~
   Make this a year that matters.

~~Read my fraternity Ritual.~~
    Live my fraternity Ritual.

~~Be a better student.~~
    Live my fraternity Ritual.

~~Be someone that makes an impact.~~

~~Be significant.~~
Live my fraternity Ritual.

~~Be stronger.~~

   ~~Be more courageous.~~
       Live my fraternity Ritual!

Be ethical.
    Be values-based.

      Be a role model.
          Be described as a man of high character.
             Live my fraternity Ritual!

~~Be a better man.~~
    Live my fraternity Ritual! And call mom more often.

Answering the Call

noreply@blogger.com (John Shertzer) — Mon, 12 Dec 2011 19:18:00 +0000

Hello?

Hi, is this Doug?

Yes. Who’s this?

This is Leadership.

Excuse me?

Leadership.

No seriously. Quit fooling around Dave.

No. Honestly, this is Leadership.

[pause]

I’m speaking to an abstract concept?

Indeed you are.

Why are you calling?

It’s time.

For what?

For you to lead.

This is really strange. I’m going to hang up now.

That’s your decision, but I would advise against it.

Why?

Because, I don’t like to call back. Especially to someone who’s been ignoring my calls for years.

I haven’t been…wait. Are you that strange caller ID I’ve been hanging up on?

Likely yes. Why did you answer this time?

It felt different.

Then I’m glad I called. Again.

Why did you call?

It’s time.

Okay – enough of this “it’s time” stuff. If you don’t tell me…

Fine. Let me be plain. Right now, as a human being, you’re just wasting space. And time.

Boy, this conversation is going great.

The problem is – you want to do more – but you don’t.

Like when?

Remember during rush when that guy in a wheelchair came by?

Josh?

Yes, Josh. You talked with him. You liked him.

Yeah – he was a great guy.

The rest of the chapter didn’t think so. They didn’t vote to give him a bid.

Well, I think…

They were uncomfortable talking to him.

Yeah, maybe but…

You weren’t.

Yeah, so?

Why didn’t you speak up on his behalf?

I…don’t…

Remember last year when Mike went in front of the standards board for doing drugs in the house?

Yes.

They gave him probation – whatever that means, and the chapter went along with it.

Yeah I remember.

You hated that decision. You wanted him removed, didn’t you?

Yes.

I saw you squirming in your chair when the decision was shared at the chapter meeting. It looked like you wanted to stand up and shout.

Yeah, I felt…

Why didn’t you?

I…don’t…

Mike’s only gotten worse since then, hasn’t he?

Yes.

Yesterday, it was just the two of you in the lunch room. You wanted to confront him. To tell him to get help.

How do you know that I...

And instead you talked about sports.

I was scared to say anything.

That seems to be a recurring problem.

[pause]

I need to get going.

Do you like where this chapter is heading?
[pause]

No, not really.

You have some ideas don’t you.

Sure.

Why are you keeping them secret?

I’m just not sure…

…that they will work?

Yeah.

That they will be received well?

Yeah.

If you will look like a fool?

Yeah. No wait, I mean…

I like fools. Those who dare. But with a purpose.

Well I’ve never been called daring.

What exactly have you been called?

A good guy. A good behind the scenes guy.

Translation: mostly invisible.

That’s not fair. Groups need behind the scenes guys.

Wrong. They need guys who can work behind the scenes. They don’t need guys who live there.

So what are you saying?

Come out of the shadows. Step up more often.

[pause]

I just don’t…I mean…I don’t get it.

Remember – this is Leadership.

Yes.

And I’m calling you.

Yes.

Are you making the connection?

No. Wait…yes...but why me?

Why not you?

I don’t know. I don’t like stirring up controversy. I’m kind of a quiet guy.

Stop.

But…

Stop with the excuses. Why are you a member?

I like the people, and the ideals.

They both need help.

But nobody has ever told me that I am a leader. I’ve never been given the chance…

Listen, if I wanted to go to a pity party, I would have called someone else.

I don’t want to be the President.

Leadership is not about position.

What is it about?

Influence. If you don’t want a title, that’s fine. Support those that are elected and lead from within.

I just…well, what do I do?

Simple. When you feel that desire to speak up, do it. When you feel pressure to shrink backwards, step forward. There are critical moments in every day in which a person can choose to lead or choose to be silent. Notice those moments, and make the choice to lead more often.

I doubt it’s that easy.

You think those things are easy? If they were, I would never have to call guys like you.

What’s the catch?

Catch? If there is one, I guess it’s that you do have to pay with your life.

Excuse me?

I’m sorry- that sounded ominous. I mean, by answering this phone, you have agreed to let your life change.

How?

Simple. You’ll be noticed now.

What if they don’t listen to me?

Some won’t. Find the ones who will.

I’m nervous.

I never call anyone who wouldn’t be.

I probably will screw up.

We all do. At least this time you’ll have good reason for it.

I’m not sure what to do.

You’ll figure it out. The hard part is over.

What’s that?

I called. And finally, you answered.

What Will the Historians Say?

noreply@blogger.com (John Shertzer) — Wed, 30 Nov 2011 01:47:00 +0000

Brothers, what we do in life echoes in eternity.

– Maximus (Russell Crowe in Gladiator)

This week, fraternity and sorority professionals will gather for the annual Association of Fraternity Advisors meeting. I used to attend AFA when I worked professionally in Higher Education, but haven’t been in a few years. I’m sure they have a good educational program planned, as they always do.

However, would it pass the Historian Test?

I’ve been working with this idea of a “Historian Test” for a few months now as a way to measure the quality of my work at Kiwanis. Any organization can use it, and it’s really quite simple. The test is based on a very apparent, yet often forgotten notion: you are living through a moment of your organization’s history. How will this moment be described by those historians who will analyze it in the future?

Here is another way to look at it: Let’s say your chapter was to fold 20 years from now – in the year 2031. If historians were to begin studying the reasons why, and researched back to the year 2011, how would they say you were spending your time? What issues were you discussing? What decisions were you making? What were your priorities back then (er, now)?

Based on what they found, what would they conclude about this point in history for your fraternity? Were the minutes of your meetings full of trivial matters (party themes) or core issues (recruitment strategies)? Were you making healthy organizational decisions, such as holding annual goal-setting retreats? Or, were you making high-risk, low-reward decisions such as hosting raging keggers?

Those who study dead civilizations, like the ancient Mayans, can usually find a turning point – a period of history in which the decline began. In those periods, scientists typically find reasons that could have been averted had the people been paying attention to what was going on around them. Are you familiar with the phrase “fiddling while Rome burns?”

Renowned business author Jim Collins studied several corporations who each experienced a severe downturn to uncover the reasons why. I wrote about them in this post. He discovered rampant complacency. These businesses assumed their success would always last and neglected preparations for their future. Enron is another example of a fallen corporation that has been studied at depth by analysts and historians.

What about the current situation at Penn State? Do you think Joe Paterno is spending every day asking himself if he did all he could years ago? When the graduate assistant informed him of what he witnessed in the locker room, do you think he realized at the time that his decision to do the bare minimum would likely lead to his ouster 10 years later?

It doesn’t have to always be negative either. Historians also look at successful organizations in order to discover what decisions they made to catapult them to unprecedented heights. See the recent books and articles about the success of Apple and Facebook, for example.

So, what will historians say about your period in history? What will they say about all of us – collectively – who are concerned about the future for fraternities and sororities? Are we doing the right things to sustain these organizations we love? Are we having the right discussions? Are we spending resources on the things that are moving the needle, or on distractions instead?

At conferences like AFA, are the speakers and workshops addressing issues of significance? How will the proceedings of these meetings be judged by historians in the future?

When historians study your organization years from now, the phrase you most want to avoid them speaking aloud is: what were they thinking?

This is only one moment in history for your organization, but it’s your moment. Your actions now will be recalled and remembered. When the great story of your time is told, will you be proud of what and how much you did? Will history be kind to you?

Will you pass the Historian Test?

An Invocation

noreply@blogger.com (John Shertzer) — Sun, 13 Nov 2011 02:39:00 +0000

(perhaps for your next chapter dinner)

Dear God-

For the innocent and vulnerable children who are victims of abuse,

May You help us develop our members into leaders strong enough to protect them,

To never ignore them,

To always confront those who would do them harm.

In a world that desperately needs individuals with courage and integrity, may the members we develop lead the way,

To step forward, when others shrink back; To stand up, when others sit down.

To do right, when others do nothing.

And for those victims,

Should they ever need a family of brothers or sisters to lean upon,

A sense of peace,

A rock around which to build a stronger life,

A place that respects them and gives them the dignity that they deserve,

Then grant us the strength, the wisdom, and the compassion,

To be a fraternity that will forever welcome them.

Amen.

Are Leaders Allowed to be Complete Jerks?

noreply@blogger.com (John Shertzer) — Wed, 09 Nov 2011 14:18:00 +0000

Like many of you, I spent the first day or so after Steve Jobs’ death admiring him and his accomplishments. I did the obligatory tweet of praise, engaged in water-cooler chats about how visionary he was, and even liked a photo on Facebook of his silhouette inside an apple. It was a really cool picture – look! -->

But after that first day, some other stories began to emerge. For example, Steve Jobs Was a Jerk: Good For Him, Steve Jobs Was a Jerk and You Shouldn't Be, and What Everyone Is Too Polite to Say About Steve Jobs. These stories formed a more complete picture of this industry titan. While he was truly visionary, innovative, and entrepreneurial, he was often a world-class jerk. One of those articles describes him this way:

“Before he was deposed from Apple the first time around, Jobs already had a reputation internally for acting like a tyrant. Jobs regularly belittled people, swore at them, and pressured them until they reached their breaking point. In the pursuit of greatness he cast aside politeness and empathy. His verbal abuse never stopped.”

Given what is revealed in these articles, as well as the new book Steve Jobs by Walter Isaacson, emulating him fully may not be the best idea.

Of course, I recognize that it is unfair to judge someone you haven’t met. These books and articles could be extreme portrayals. Suffice to say, Jobs leadership style was probably more Bobby Knight than Mister Rogers.

If you get results as a leader, is it okay to be a complete a-hole during the journey? How much does the “touchy-feely” side of leadership really matter? If you can hold the trophy for top fraternity at the end of the year, should you care if you pissed off everyone in the process? “What that’s you’re saying about hurting your feelings? I can’t hear too well with this big freakin’ trophy in my ear!”

To be fair, there can be quite a difference between being demanding and being a jerk, although sometimes it may look the same. Being tough on someone is a coaching technique that will often produce results. Sometimes, a person just needs to be told in a direct manner that their performance is lacking and that expectations are not being met. I’ve had coaches and teachers like that in my life.

But, I’ve also had raving egoists in my life as well.

The difference lies in who the leader is centered on. If he/she is centered on the other, then it’s more of a “tough love” kind of coaching. The goal is to try and help the other person achieve what they are capable of. If the leader is centered on self, then the goal instead is to prop him/herself up at the expense of the other person. Based on what I’ve read, Jobs wasn’t too concerned with the other person.

And yet, he achieved marvelous good for humankind. His products have helped usher in a new wave of technology, which in turn has improved educational and economic conditions in many places. So what if he belittled and bullied some people along the way?

There is a lot written on being a relational leader and on the importance of emotional intelligence. However, emotional intelligence did not invent the I-Phone. In fact, an intentional lack of it might have instead.

But then again, does that mean we can’t be disappointed, or extra cautious in following the examples of very public leaders? You may want your child to be just like Steve Jobs. I’m not so sure about it.

Leaders always have shortcomings, and the perfect leader is a myth…isn’t it? Leaders are human, and humans are flawed.

You can try to be both a hard driver and a kind soul at the same time. I do, although the driver role is clearly not my strong point. Regardless, I am fascinated by people like Steve Jobs, who seem to have no desire at all to be liked – only respected for their achievements.

If you had to decide, what would it be? To be the nice guy or the mean S.O.B.? To be too gentle or too aggressive? To shrink into the group or unabashedly take your position at the front of it? To see your people or the end result as the most important? To be seen as likeable or tough?

There are many different styles of leadership. It’s your call as to which you use. It may come down to your answer to this question: should the leader be judged more for the results that he achieved, or the person that he was?

You Don’t Need Another Greek Council

noreply@blogger.com (John Shertzer) — Wed, 26 Oct 2011 13:53:00 +0000

A year or so ago, I wrote about the most unfortunate outcome of many Greek community retreats: the desire to have an All-Greek BBQ. Another idea that emerges almost as often is just as unnecessary: the All-Greek Council.

“Hey everybody, let’s create an All-Greek Council!”

Now, if you are a member of a small Greek community and only have one governing council for all fraternities and sororities, then this doesn’t apply to you. I’m speaking to the campuses that already have an IFC, Panhellenic, and/or NPHC and now want to establish an All-Greek Council or Board as well.

You don’t need it.

Developing an All-Greek Council is like baking a third pie simply because the crust on the other two was just a little too flaky.

You have governing councils already. They are just not getting the job done.

You probably want an All-Greek Council so that you can communicate better between all the groups. The current councils can and should do that. Maybe you want an All-Greek Council to improve inter-fraternity or inter-sorority relations. Your current councils can and should do that as well. Worst of all, maybe you want an All-Greek Council so you can plan the next All-Greek BBQ. Nobody should be doing that.

Let’s be honest – there are two reasons you really want an All-Greek Council. First, fraternity and sorority members are joiners and we can’t get enough of groups. We just can’t help ourselves sometimes; it’s way too much fun to dream up new organizations to belong to. Secondly, it’s easier to build something from scratch rather than fix something that’s broken.

Plus, we have an addiction to the idea that if we just bring everyone together, all problems will be solved.

Here’s the reality: if you have problems of poor communication and poor inter-group relations, the All-Greek Council is not the magic answer. In fact, it will likely become as irrelevant in regards to those issues as the councils you already have. But hey, at least you’ll have a new one to complain about!

Inter-Greek relations are not built by grandiose events, big meetings, or new organizations. They are built by honesty and trust. Besides, when we talk about poor relations, we’re really talking about fraternity-to-fraternity and sorority-to-sorority. Your IFC, Panhellenic, and NPHC councils need to be the forums where honest conversations between the groups are had.

Communication issues are really about our inability as leaders to have good conversations with each other. Those need to happen outside the council meetings. An All-Greek Council would become just another opportunity for a talking head to go through a series of announcements and fliers about upcoming events, or lectures about how we should all just get along. We’ve got Facebook to do that for us now.

Your IFC, Panhellenic, and/or NPHC should be the place where you discuss collective needs and chart your future together. And there are good reasons to keep them as separate councils devoted to organizations that have lots in common with each other. Men’s and Women’s Greek-letter organizations are unique enough in their structure and philosophies to keep them separate in how they are governed.

If you want to still want to have those feel-good moments of bringing everyone together, then schedule joint meetings of the councils once a semester. Rotate which council “leads” the meeting. However, taking the time and energy to build a whole new organization is ignoring the purpose of the ones that are already there.

“Hey everybody, let’s create an All-Greek Council!”

Nah, let's not.

First Graduate, Then Initiate

noreply@blogger.com (John Shertzer) — Wed, 12 Oct 2011 03:19:00 +0000

I am an advocate for eliminating pledging from the fraternity experience - an idea that gets a lot of opposition whenever it gets raised. Undergraduates and alumni alike seem to really like the idea of pledging, and most seem to consider it a critical element of fraternity life. I still don’t like it, but if we need to have it, let’s make the most of it.

What if, instead, we doubled-down on pledging? If it is truly a critical piece - the preparatory period for a young adult to learn how to live the values of the fraternity/sorority - then let’s not leave it to just 4, 6, or 8 weeks. What about 4 years instead? I’m not joking.

What if fraternity and sorority members weren’t officially initiated into their fraternity or sorority until the day after they graduated from college? That’s right - undergraduate students would be “pledging” their organization for the length of their undergraduate years (or at least from whatever point as an undergrad they accept their bid for membership).

Graduating seniors would go to commencement, walk across the stage, flip the tassel, have a nice lunch with family and friends, and then head over to the chapter house for the initiation Ritual.

Here would be some intriguing benefits of such an idea:

If everyone in the undergraduate chapter is a “new member” or “pledge,” then the power dynamic of pledge vs. active is removed. All are striving towards the same goal: initiation.
Undergraduate members would learn the values and expectations of the organization, and their initiation could be contingent on how well they lived those values during their college years. Perhaps someone could not be initiated unless their peers and advisors vouched for their character. The deadbeat Seniors would drift away and would never be allowed into full membership.
Fraternities and Sororities could set a GPA requirement for initiation that takes the entire 4-5 undergraduate years into account.
Once initiated, the recent graduates would receive information on getting involved in a young professionals chapter of their organization in the city/town to which they relocate. And, the excitement of initiation could mean they are more inspired to be involved as a recent alum.
If it turns out a particular fraternity isn’t a good fit - there is more flexibility to change one’s mind. If I accept a bid to one sorority as a freshman, but then discover as a sophomore that another sorority is more congruent with my values, then I move on. No letter to the headquarters promising that I won’t divulge secrets would be required. Does that make you nervous that people would be jumping from org to org in a chaotic fashion? What are you afraid of? Shouldn’t we embrace the goal of matching personal values with organizational values, no matter how long it takes to figure that out?
Because of that same flexibility, national fraternities/sororities would be more accountable for providing a quality experience. In a way, they would need to make the case to the undergrads for four years that the fraternity or sorority is something to be proud of.

Of course the idea isn't perfect. Would uninitiated men and women be interested in operating an organization they aren't fully members of? Maybe the friendship and fellowship would still be enough of a draw to make that happen. Many other issues would need to be worked out. However, member apathy, hazing, and alumni engagement are perpetual problems we have no bold answers for. Maybe there is a solution to be found in waiting until a young person experiences one of the proudest moments of their life - graduation - before they receive an experience equally as profound - their fraternity initiation.

Footloose Leadership

noreply@blogger.com (John Shertzer) — Thu, 29 Sep 2011 01:07:00 +0000

Hollywood is running out of ideas. Hence, the constant stream of remakes of classic 80’s movies. Karate Kid, Clash of the Titans, Tron, and now Footloose. Why can’t they just leave well enough alone? I am saddened by the fact that the world’s children may never experience the wonder of a Ralph Macchio crane kick, or Harry Hamlin fighting a sea monster made out of playdough, all because of shiny new retreads. If they come out with some new auto-tune pop version of Kenny Loggins’ Footloose theme, I’m gonna scream. By the way, I’m writing this as I smoke a corn cob pipe in my rocking chair.

Anyhow, before the new Footloose comes out and ruins that once glorious franchise, allow me to turn back to the original and find some lessons on leadership and fraternity. After all, movies are visual stories, and stories are full of metaphors for life. Some are obvious, and others are hidden. Here are six leadership lessons I found from one of the best movies of my youth:

1. Sometimes a little defiance is what the world needs.
There are basically two camps in Footloose - the young people and their quest for self-expression, and the town elders and their quest for moral protection. While being concerned with morals and values is important, clearly the adults went overboard in the movie - even to the point that they were burning books. The whole town needed a course correction; a splash of cold water in the face. The adults in the community had become so narrowly obsessed with protecting their young people from sin, that they were essentially killing each young person’s sense of self. Enter Ren and his “radical” notion that there’s nothing wrong with dancing and listening to loud music. He led small acts of defiance which eventually led to a revolutionary change for the community.

As a leader (and teacher, parent, etc.), the moments that drive you the craziest are those moments when those you are leading “act out” against expectations. Sometimes it’s entirely right to correct them and remind them of why the expectations exist. However, it’s also entirely right for a leader to stop and think about why that defiance happened. Are your followers telling you something? Perhaps they are showing you that the environment is too confining, or that decisions are being made too unilaterally. Or, perhaps they are in fact leading you in those moments. They are opening up a pathway that you could not see.

In higher education we talk a lot about “shared leadership” or that all people are leaders. If that’s true, then the first thing that needs to go is the tight control that the Reverend in Footloose was exerting. Don’t bristle at defiance. Come to understand and accept it - and maybe even embrace it a little.

2. Dancing around an empty warehouse may not be your thing, but you should take time to unleash your passion.
When I work with nonprofit executive directors, I observe an internal struggle they are contending with. They started or joined up with the organization because they believed in the cause and wanted to “make a difference.” As the organization developed and they were elevated to executive roles, the passion for the cause became overwhelmed by the mundane practices of running an business - budgets, benefits, board management, personnel issues, etc. Those who navigate that shift well do so because they still find intentional ways to remind themselves of the cause that still calls their heart.

One of the most famous scenes in Footloose is when Ren (Kevin Bacon) drives into an old warehouse and does a burning solo dance routine (including some impressive uneven bar gymnastics on the pipes). His dance is more a result of rage and frustration. He just needed to let it out. Sometimes leaders have to find ways to deal with frustration as well, but I would broaden it to include any opportunity to escape the day-to-day grind of your work and rediscover the passion that led you there.

Read more. Delegate more. Spend more time in the trenches again. For fraternity and sorority leaders, don’t stop having fun. Laugh more.

As a leader, you are constantly with other people and dealing with the details. Finding some private time to tear it up in a warehouse may be just what you need.

3. Don’t play games of chicken with farm machinery.
Seriously, someone could have been killed!

4. If given the opportunity, people may surprise you with how well they dance.
A constant challenge for a leader is understanding the strengths of those you lead. Sharing leadership means putting people in a position to succeed. If you are tasking the abstract-thinker with the house manager job for example, be prepared for chaos.

One of the campiest elements of Footloose is how the high school students - having their first school dance ever - could all of the sudden do moves that would make Michael Jackson’s jaw drop. There was even a dude that could breakdance. Anyhow, the lesson is that some people have talents and strengths that we never see simply because they haven’t been allowed to use them.

Perhaps their is a man or woman in your organization who doesn’t fit the typical mold of a leader, and so you’ve been hesitant to give him/her responsibility. Let your impressions inform you, but don’t let them control you. Perhaps that person is just one opportunity away from doing something extraordinary, such as a toprock that would make Paula Abdul jealous.

5. Stand up to the town elders, but do so with respect.
Some may regard Ren’s speech at the town council meeting as the climatic turning point for the community. However, remember that after that speech, the council still voted to uphold the ban on dancing. So the young people circumvented the law by holding the dance just over the county line. This was an “in your face” move to the town elders, and most would have left it at that and went to the dance with their middle fingers in the air.

To me, the turning point in the movie was when Ren went to the Reverend’s house to try and personally convince him to allow the dance. He went for an honest conversation, which included listening and finding common ground. This showed maturity on his part and respect for the position that the Reverend and others had taken over the years. His desire to make change, coupled with his respect for past decisions, produced better results.

A couple of takeways from this. First, a good speech can win fans but personal conversations win hearts. The one-on-one conversation is the single-most irreplaceable tool that a leader has. Secondly, almost all people have reasons for doing what they do and believing what they believe, and each person believes their reasons to be legitimate. The adults in Footloose were not acting out of hate, but rather out of concern. When you respect others viewpoints and treat them as legitimate, they will be more receptive to you when you want to change them. For fraternity and sorority leaders, consider that the next time you go see your Greek Advisor (and vice versa).

6. Loosen up.
Everybody cut, everybody cut. (Enough said)

So there - a few simple lessons and reminders from Footloose. Watch the new version if you must, for I assume similar themes will emerge. But I will keep the original as my go-to source for a story about defiant leadership that can change a community.

Remember, as a leader, to not be afraid to cut footloose every once in a while. As Ren, the new kid in town, so famously shouted, "Let's Dance!"

Taxes, Spending, and Your Fraternity (Poll)

noreply@blogger.com (John Shertzer) — Wed, 21 Sep 2011 12:26:00 +0000

How much do you care about the financial decisions of your (inter)national organization?

The United States of America continues to be embroiled in a debate about the fiscal condition of our government. Taxes are too high, taxes are too low. Spending is too much, spending is not enough. The debate even spawned a new entity - The Tea Party- which emerged in opposition to government spending and keeping the issue front and center. Elections are often turned on economic issues, and this next presidential election will likely fit this bill. Any way you slice it, Americans are as concerned as ever about the fiscal state of their government.

What about the fiscal state of your government - i.e., your national or international organization? Do you care much about that? You pay dues - a.k.a. taxes - but does it really matter to you how those dues are spent?

Are you concerned with fiscal excess or waste? Or even largess? Does it matter to you how large your headquarters building is? How about how many trips your staff takes, and in what class they fly? Do you know how much your executive director is paid, and do you really care?

What about spending priorities? Should your dues dollars help plan and subsidize events for only a select number of members? Do you like the materials that are produced and the services you receive from your (inter)national office? Do you like how much time and money is being directed towards fraternity lobbying efforts in Washington DC right now? Generally, do you feel like your (inter)national organization spends money on the right things to ensure a strong future for your fraternity or sorority?

All of these questions could also be applied to your governing council on campus as well, since you likely pay dues there also.

Certainly there are degrees to which you can care about anything. Perhaps you don’t care, but if your dues were to go up, you would start to take notice. Others of you may wish to know how each one your dues dollars is spent.

Issues of purpose, relevance, and mission help determine an organization’s future. However, financial stability matters almost as much. You likely care about and pay attention to the former, but what about the latter? Does it matter?

Comments are welcome below.

Is it Hazing? Just Ask.

noreply@blogger.com (John Shertzer) — Wed, 07 Sep 2011 13:24:00 +0000

I've really enjoyed reading and contributing to the #40answers campaign on Twitter, which is an effort to argue against common excuses for hazing. Thanks to Sigma Nu and PreventHazing.org for this great tool to defeat a persistent scourge of fraternity and sorority life. This post is inspired by the many great conversations happening in that campaign.

When challenged to eliminate hazing from new member education programs, a common response from undergraduates is that it's not that easy. Because "everything is hazing nowadays."

My response back to them is “you may be right, but that’s not an excuse.”

Here is why they may be right. Some things are very easy to put into the hazing bucket. Physical beatings, branding, sleep deprivation, forced consumption of alcohol, etc. But what about scavenger hunts, mandatory meetings, member interviews, taking tests, etc.? Some may feel that these easily fall into the category of hazing, but I see them more as gray areas.

We have reached a point where you could list any expectation or activity and somebody out there could find a way to call it hazing. And I've seen some hazing experts and lawyers do just that as a way to show their prowess in understanding the hazing issue. Any skeet that gets sent up gets shot down. But where does this leave the undergraduates? Confused and annoyed; two qualities that typically don't turn them into changemakers.

So, I sympathize with those who throw up their hands and say that if everything is hazing, why even try to fight against it?

But here is why it is not an excuse to say that everything can be called hazing. Greek leaders have resources all around them that can give them guidance and clarification as to whether something is hazing. And, any new member education activity can be replaced with something better. Except of course for the Ritual.

But back to the original question: how do you know if something is or isn't hazing?

Simple. Just ask.

That's right! For just three easy installments of $19.99, you too can have the "Just Ask" solution! Just kidding of course. It's FREE.

In case you don't see it as that simple, I've mapped out a flowchart of the "Just Ask" solution. See below:

This flowchart assumes that your (inter)national headquarters and/or campus Greek Life professional is willing to let you be honest and forthcoming in sharing the specifics of your new member education program. And, in order for us to get a grip on this issue of hazing, they HAVE to be. Your university, your headquarters, and many other entities across the world have challenged you to rid your organization of hazing, and thus you have the right to challenge them to help you do it. After all, in the case of your headquarters, you pay dues in order to receive services in return.

Some headquarters and campus professionals will be willing and able to meet this challenge, but others won't be. While I appreciate the amount of energy that goes into philosophically attacking the issue of hazing - and many are prepared to argue against it - we need to direct a large portion of that energy to guidance and support of our undergraduate chapters as they move in the right direction.

Fellow professionals: if we get a willing partner in the undergraduate chapters - willing enough to simply ask whether or not something they view as innocent might be hazing - it is our duty to coach them up. Just saying "stop hazing" without any advice or guidance for something better is like the old hazing activity of dropping someone off in the middle of nowhere and expecting them to make it home.

Undergraduates: Have the courage to show your cards. If you truly believe you have designed productive and educational activities for your new members, then you have no reason to not check them out with the professionals who are paid (sometimes by you) to help you.

If we meet each other half way, we'll leave hazing in the dust.

Grading Recent University Decisions

noreply@blogger.com (John Shertzer) — Thu, 01 Sep 2011 13:58:00 +0000

It’s a tough job being a University President, or any high-level administrator for that case. Your decisions are always scrutinized and judged, much of the time without all of the facts. And that’s exactly what I’m about to do.

Three high-profile incidents involving college fraternities and sororities happened recently at three significant universities. In each case, university administrators took action. One of the decisions I applauded, one caused me concern, and one made my blood boil. That gave me the idea to grade the actions of the primary university officials involved in each case. This is entirely subjective. I’m sure these are all pleasant people and I’m trying to judge only their actions in these matters.

I also understand that if we were grading the chapters themselves, the IFCs, Panhellenics, or National Headquarters, they would likely be as low or lower. But, this is about the administrators who chose the spotlight by making very public decisions.

I would be very interested in your own grades, and the reasons behind them. Here we go…

University of South Carolina

The Call: Suspended fraternity recruitment almost immediately after it began, citing issues with underage alcohol consumption.

The Decider: Associate VP for Student Affairs, Jerry Brewer

What he did right:

Took a bold step that woke everybody up.
Held forums to listen directly to student concerns.
Made the recruitment ban temporary for most of the chapters.

What he did wrong:

Forgot that student ownership of an issue starts with acceptance and buy-in, not heavy-handed discipline.
In statements, sounded adversarial and condescending - an approach that is not going to get students or alumni to root for him.
Has failed to acknowledge cultural forces that impact the issue. Will we ever see him suspend tailgating on football Saturdays?

Bottom-Line: Change needed to happen, but the top-down approach will likely mean results will be scarce.

The Grade:

Cornell University

The Call: End pledging starting in 2012 and replace with better recruitment system.

The Decider: University President, David Skorton

What he did right:

I believe he’s right on the issue, since not only can fraternities and sororities survive just fine without pledging, it has been holding us back from recruitment practices that will launch us into the next era.
He set forward the vision, and then empowered students to develop the means.
He recognizes the value of the fraternity experience, and wants to see it grow and modernize.

What he did wrong:

His approach to the issue is too hazing-centric. Of course, he was reacting to a student death. However, pledging should be removed for other reasons as well, including the role it plays in creating cultures of apathy in Greek-letter organizations.
He could have empowered the students before going public, thereby not putting students on the defensive or in a reactionary mode.
How much better would his op-ed in the New York Times have been if it had been co-written by the IFC/Fraternity Council President?

The Bottom-Line: If fraternity and sorority leaders accept the call to action, this could be the moment when their Greek system begins to rocket skyward.

The Grade:

Princeton University

The Call: Ban freshmen students from joining fraternities and sororities.

The Decider: University President, Shirley M. Tilghman

What she did right:

Enlisted a committee, including student representatives, to study the issue before taking the action.

What she did wrong:

Her comments, as well as those of her other administrators, make it sound as though she thinks 18-19 year-olds have the decision-making ability of a loaf of bread.
In a letter, she channeled her inner Dean Wormer by stating that the trustees "if necessary, would be sympathetic to taking even stronger steps." Tough talk to college students = lighter fluid on a BBQ pit.
Because Princeton doesn’t officially recognize fraternities and sororities, she is basically telling students: Hey freshmen, you’re not allowed to join these things we don’t recognize at all until you’re sophomores. Understand? (This is the Ivy League, correct?)
She is aligning with helicopter parents and others who believe that the best way to prepare young adults for life is to seal them in a clear plastic hamster ball.

The Bottom-Line: Eventually, the fraternities and sororities will realize that they do not need university recognition to be successful and become community-based organizations. If so, watch them grow.

The Grade:

Thoughts on USC's Suspension of Fraternity Recruitment

noreply@blogger.com (John Shertzer) — Tue, 23 Aug 2011 14:58:00 +0000

Here are some thoughts on the current situation at the University of South Carolina regarding fraternity recruitment. If you are unaware of the situation, you can read about it here. The University of South Carolina has suspended fraternity recruitment because of a series of alcohol-related incidents already this semester. I want to preface these thoughts by saying that I’m fully aware I am an outsider to this. I only know and can react to what I’ve read. I’m sure all sides are trying their best.

Yet, there are three truths in life: death, taxes, and that 18-22 year-olds don’t like being told what to do. I understand why the University felt they needed to act, and why they felt they needed to act swiftly. I really don’t mind the decision, since it seems as though that community needs to step back and re-assess itself.

There is also something to be said about the courage of this decision. Backlash was certain. I always admire people and organizations strong enough to put their hand up and say “enough.” I have nothing against the administrators because I’m sure they believe they are doing the right thing.

I only wish the decision had been made differently. I only wish it was the students who were the ones saying “enough.” And I think it could have been.

The students need to change their behavior. There needs to be no alcohol in the recruitment process, and the emphasis on alcohol in fraternity life needs to be diminished. Those goals are noble and need to be pursued. However, I’ve seen too many situations where the process to try and achieve goals such as these is a heavy-handed, top-down, parent-child approach. And it never seems to work.

Why are we surprised about the student reaction? Sure - some of their responses have been immature, but when people feel cornered or dismissed, they fight back. And often without logic.

According to reports, university administrators had told student leaders in the Spring that things needed to change. Fair enough. What if they had instead worked with the Fraternity Council to form a group of staff/students to develop a strategic plan for alcohol-free recruitment? In my few years working with fraternities and sororities, I haven’t really seen the Dean Wormer approach of “shape up or else” work very well. Although it is used extensively.

Again, this doesn’t mean the university shouldn’t have acted, or set high expectations for the fraternities. But if they wanted results - if they wanted a change in behavior - those expectations could have been matched with more guidance and support.

Also, according to reports, fraternities were informed of this decision by email. Do any of us like being given hard news by impersonal means? Hosting a meeting with leaders to tell them in person would have been better. They could have given the leaders the tools to communicate the decision back to their members (even though some still wouldn’t have used them).

The students need to grow up and take ownership for this problem. They know it was there, and they’ve been asleep at the wheel. Because of that, they have deferred much of their power over to the university administrators. The Fraternity Council should be ashamed of itself for how invisible it appears to be. However, if progress in this situation is for the students to take ownership again, I’m cynical the current course of events will get us there.

I can still remember my perspective as a fraternity undergraduate. I wanted us to captain our own ship, not just ride on one that was built for us.

It seems that as Greek professionals and university administrators get further away from the undergraduate years, they become more and more amazed that the students just don’t get it. It’s like we’ve all pulled up rocking chairs on the front porch and are taking turns saying, “these kids today!” These kids today aren’t very different from kids their age across time. They will do the right thing, once they believe it’s the right thing to do. They will also respond better to their peers rather than the town elders from Footloose.

There is defiance in the DNA of fraternities that goes all the way back to our founding. This has caused the relationship between us and our host institutions to be perpetually strained. That will probably never change. However, our approach as alumni and administrators can.

It will be interesting to watch this as it goes forward. I hope to see the Fraternity Council respond as partners in this problem and take a very active role in its solution. I also hope to see them regarded as such by the university administrators.

Am I seeing this incorrectly? Feel free to comment below.

Me vs. The Couch

noreply@blogger.com (John Shertzer) — Tue, 09 Aug 2011 13:57:00 +0000

I could just sit right here,

On this very comfortable couch,

All day.

And not feel any regret.

Because I’ve done enough for now.

I deserve a break.

No one will miss me if I hole up here for a while.
I can let the couch win.

There’s nothing wrong with a lazy day.

I could just sit right here,

And let myself be distracted,

By the vast wasteland of 600 channels.

Catch up on reality TV,

Check out movies I haven’t seen since…

Last week.

Poker on ESPN, Jersey Shore on MTV.

It’s nice to just do something

Mindless.

I could just sit right here,

Take this controller that is

Connected to that box,

And enter an alternative video game world.

I can blow things up.

I can win the World Series.

I can pretend that I’m a rock legend.

It’s fun,

There’s a sense of achievement,

And of course, I’m improving my

Hand-eye coordination.

I could just sit right here

And stare out of this window.

Sit in a quiet and reflective state.

Contemplate life, develop theories,

Think about what I should do.

Then analyze that thought,

Change my mind,

Start over again,

Be lost in my thoughts.

Just think,

And reflect,

And stare.

I could just sit here

Read about others;

Be a critic.

“Well that was stupid.”

“What on earth was he thinking?”

“I would have done it differently.”

“That will never work.”

And then,

Turn back to reality TV.

I could just sit here

And sleep.

But I can’t,

For no idea, action, or passion

Has exhausted me.

Yet, lethargy is so draining.

So if I can’t sleep,

I’ll just relax instead.

Wait,

I can’t do that.

I can’t just sit here, I can’t just relax.

I made a decision to do more.
To be a part of a movement.

To strive to be my best self.

To do more with my life.

There are plenty of people

Sitting on couches,

Watching TV, thinking, criticizing,

Playing video games.

But there are not enough of me.

I can’t just sit here because there is a force,

Greater than the gravity

That keeps me grounded.

It’s the force of oaths and commitments

That like a great blast of air

Lifts me up,

And pushes me out,

Of hiding.

I can’t just sit here

And stare at a screen,

Or out the window.

I need instead to look directly

Into the weary face of a world that needs me.

The couch beckons me and

I could just sit here.

But I can’t.

And I won’t.

It’s time to get up off this couch,

And get to work.

If You Always Look for Problems, That’s Always What You’ll Find

noreply@blogger.com (John Shertzer) — Wed, 27 Jul 2011 12:16:00 +0000

We’re getting closer to August, and the time when thousands of fraternity and sorority members will return to campus and begin another year. Many of those groups will do the smart thing and have a retreat to plan out the year and set goals. At the minimum, almost all fraternity and sorority leaders will think about questions like: what do we need to do to reach our potential? To achieve excellence?

This post isn’t meant to answer those questions, for each situation is unique. Rather, let me offer you some thoughts on how you get to those answers.

Fraternity and sorority life is a “problems-based” industry. We are constantly talking about problems. We seem to always be focused like a laser on what’s wrong with us and what needs to be fixed.

It can be depressing. I only have my hunches to back this up, but I think one of the reasons there is so much turnover in campus Greek advising is that individuals just get sick and tired of the constant negativity.

I don’t believe that we can ignore our problems, especially the ones that could jeopardize our future in an instant. But, what if we focused on our problems just a little bit less? You might ask, well what would we focus on instead?

We would focus on what’s working.

You have a choice for where you put your energy. You can put it towards finding problems (and if you look for them, you will find them), or you can put it towards finding the life-giving forces that make your organization thrive. When you do the latter, you likely increase the exceptional stuff you want and overwhelm the negative stuff you don’t.

This whole approach is called Appreciate Inquiry. There are scores of books and articles on this very scholarly topic. I invite you to investigate it further, but here is a quick summary in terms of fraternities and sororities:

Appreciative Inquiry means that you ask questions of each other in order to unlock what is often hidden from view: namely, the parts of our organizations that are working and should be emphasized. But, we tend to do the opposite. At a typical fraternity or sorority event, we might ask questions such as:

·         What is holding us back from success?
·         What are the biggest challenges we face?
·         How do we fix our problems?

The answers to these questions would come from the standard fraternity/sorority problem index: poor recruitment, risk management, brotherhood/sisterhood issues, member apathy, Senior member motivation, etc. We would then try to develop 3-5 targeted solutions for each of these problems. Sounds reasonable, right?

The only thing is it’s not very effective. If it were, we wouldn’t still be as stuck with these problems as we are.

What if instead, we focused on what’s working? Maybe your chapter has an awesome calendar of service projects. Why do your members get so excited about service? After investigating that question, maybe you find out that members see it as a great vehicle for camaraderie. Now we know that members hunger for opportunities to work together on significant things. Can this new knowledge be applied to chapter academics (which haven’t been very good)? Could this lead to more collaborative and social study sessions at the chapter house? Let’s try that.

If you had instead started by asking “why does our chapter GPA suck?” you may never have reached the idea of building camaraderie. You probably would have designed another unsuccessful points system or something like that.

Appreciative Inquiry sometimes is as simple as re-framing the questions that we ask. See below:

Typical Questions	Appreciative Questions
Why aren’t we getting the number of recruits we want?	Why do we have the recruits we do? What did they see in us that compelled them to join? How can we use those reasons to our advantage?
What’s wrong with our brotherhood/sisterhood?	When in the recent past has our brotherhood/ sisterhood felt the strongest? What was going on that made that happen?
How can we force members to follow our risk management policy?	What was the last social event we had that felt really safe and really fun? What made it so?
Where did all the Seniors go?	Who have been Seniors that have been really engaged? Why did they stay involved?
How do we stop our downward slide?	What is the best thing we did last year? What made it the best? How can we apply those lessons to other things we do?
Why do we suck as a chapter?	In what areas do we excel as a chapter?

Do you see how simply re-framing those questions makes them much more exciting and positive? By using appreciate inquiry, you are learning from your successes, not your failures. You’re putting a spotlight on what works, not what’s broken. And yet, in doing so, you are making repairs.

Appreciative Inquiry is based on several principles, some of which are particularly germane to fraternity and sorority life:

The Constructionist Principle says that “words create worlds.” In other words, how we talk about something helps to create it. For fraternity and sorority, this means the more we talk about ourselves as endless problems, the more likely we are to become that.

The Poetic Principle simply says that whatever we focus on, grows. If we focus on problems, they may only get bigger because we are elevating them. Likewise if we focus on positive elements. One of the primary tenets of Appreciative Inquiry is that by allowing the positive forces to grow, they will overtake the negative ones.

The Anticipatory Principle says that “what we believe, we conceive.” If we put in our minds-eye an image of our organization as vibrant and dynamic, that vision will direct our actions.

I think these principles can be a stretch for analytical thinkers who only want to diagnose problems and prescribe solutions. There is still a time and place for that. However, too often we let that “fix the problem” mentality dominate at all levels of our organizations – all the way up to boardrooms. Save that for the small stuff. For the big things – vision, goals, future – focus instead on the best of what you are. Let those discoveries determine the course you take.

It is a maxim of Appreciative Inquiry that in every organization that exists, something is working.

And it’s there for you to find.

Thanks for reading this summer. I’ll be back in two weeks with a new post to kick off the start of the academic year.

A Tribute to My Greek Advisor: Brian Breittholz

noreply@blogger.com (John Shertzer) — Wed, 13 Jul 2011 12:41:00 +0000

I hope you will allow me a very personal post this week.

I attended Miami University in Oxford, Ohio. That’s where I became a Theta Chi in the Spring of 1995. My Greek Advisor for all my years at Miami was Brian Breittholz. Those who have been around the fraternal movement for a while know Brian very well. He has always been a big personality, a loveable friend, and a brilliant thinker on fraternity issues. He has won many awards, including the NIC Award of Distinction.

Brian hasn’t been the Greek Advisor at Miami for a while now, but he has always remained a fixture at Miami and in Miami’s Greek community. Brian advised chapters, including the alpha of Beta Theta Pi, and mentored other professionals who came to Oxford. He was someone I could visit when I went back to see my alma mater. For many outside of Oxford, especially those involved with fraternity life, Brian was the face of Miami. As an alum, I was very proud of that.

Brian announced this week that that he will be leaving Miami to take a new job at Indiana University. The red bricks are shedding a tear.

Brian and I became friends 17 years ago when I worked as a student receptionist in the student activities office. From there, he mentored me as a chapter president and as IFC president. We were an unlikely pair. A transplanted New Yorker with an affinity for cigarettes, biting sarcasm, and the occasional curse word advising an innocent plaid-shirted country boy from the Midwest. He lost the cigarettes and I lost the plaid, but the rest of us remains. Brian will always be a mentor and a friend.

On that note, I wanted to quickly share some of the many things I learned from Brian Breittholz:

Nothing can make you as memorable as a distinct laugh. You could have a third eye and still be forgotten more easily than someone with a laugh that forces others to laugh back.
Good advisors, like most good parents, limit the times they scold or express anger. However, there is no question when you disappoint them.
If you’re going to do an awards ceremony or formal event, go all out. A good production matters. The Academy Awards had nothing on Brian’s Greek Awards night!
There is at least one person on earth who thinks Chaka Kahn is one of the greatest singers ever.
You can teach values and stress character, and do so with colorful language.
Treat students with the respect of a colleague and the care of a family member.
ALWAYS leave action-oriented messages.
Always listen to chapter advisors.
Once in a rare while, something good comes out of Ohio University.
Come prepared to meetings. Be ready to answer tough questions.
When you have a sense of humor, others want to be around you.
You can like things the way you like them, and want things the way you want them, and not have to be considered “high maintenance.”
Sometimes an “I love you kid” is all you need to keep going.

Brian – Miami will miss you. But, Miami will never forget you. That’s what happens when a person leaves a legacy of significance. Now, It’s Indiana’s turn.

Congrats on the new job my friend. You’re welcome for dinner anytime.

If You Have a Fast Race Horse, Don't Slow Down

noreply@blogger.com (John Shertzer) — Tue, 21 Jun 2011 13:14:00 +0000

Horse racing’s Triple Crown – the Kentucky Derby, Preakness Stakes, and Belmont Stakes, finished up a week or so ago. There was no Triple Crown winner (meaning a horse that wins all three races), and there hasn’t been one since 1978. It’s become one of the rarest feats in sports, and only 11 horses have ever achieved it. Probably the most famous Triple Crown winner was a horse you’ve most likely heard of: Secretariat.

I was finally able to watch the recent movie about this famous equine (titled simply “Secretariat”) while on a flight the other day. I had been looking forward to seeing it, because I didn’t really know the story. I knew that Secretariat was a Triple Crown winner, but that’s about it. The movie was fine. It’s a Disney movie, so the character lessons were very straightforward, the heroes were heroic, and the villains were dastardly. I think the general viewer would walk away from the story of Secretariat with another reminder that one should never stop believing in their dreams. Good lesson.

I saw something else.

The ending surprised me. Of course, since Secretariat is a true story, I knew that he would win all the races and thus win the Triple Crown. That wasn’t the surprising part. To me, the surprising part was the final race.

All the dramatic pieces were in place for the final race, the Belmont Stakes: the champ (Secretariat), the unlikable challenger (a horse named Champ, trained by an arrogant blowhard), and history on the line. The typical formula (see Rocky or Remember the Titans) for these kinds of stories is that the hero fights the battle of his life, appears defeated, only to valiantly battle back to barely win, sending the crowd into a frenzy. That wasn’t the case with Secretariat. He blew the doors off the competition and won by thirty lengths. It wasn’t close at all. The outcome was decided almost immediately after the gates opened.

And I found this to be refreshing for some reason. Secretariat was clearly the best horse at the time (and has since been called the best racehorse ever), and he knew it. He flew. And while I can gain satisfaction from the underdog stories (see the 2011 Dallas Mavericks), I learned that I could find equal satisfaction in watching a truly special champion just do all that he was capable of. Without apology.

Relate this to fraternity and sorority life. On most campuses, there are chapters that are the Secretariats of their Greek system. They have all pistons firing, and are leading the pack in service, academics, recruitment, etc.

Our underdog mindset sometimes wants us to tell these groups to slow down. To let others catch up. The Secretariats can take so much of the spotlight that they can become tiresome. It’s like dominate sports teams. We can get tired of their success, and thus want to see others take a turn.

Slow down Secretariat!

I may be naïve about this, but I believe that most of the time, groups that are successful and groups that struggle do not get to those points by accident. However, our underdog mentality can drift into dangerous territory – fairness.

It’s not fair that some fraternities or sororities are at the top, while others can’t seem to get there! Every group deserves that success! There must be equality!

Slow down Secretariat!

Of course, this isn’t a perfect analogy. There isn’t a race we’re trying to win. Sometimes, environmental factors can play a role. Our groups at the top aren’t perfect, and shouldn’t be treated that way. Caring about the plight of others is a value we hold dear. I understand all of that.

And yet, I believe that sometimes we actively try to slow lead horses down to the rest of pack instead of expecting the rest of the pack to catch up to the lead horses.

Slow down Secretariat!

And I don’t think the answer is for the lead horses to stop and try to teach the rest the secrets to their success. Besides, the secrets are most likely very obvious: focus and hard work.

I think the answer is to just let the lead horses run, in all their glory, for all to see. If they deserve the award – give it to them. If they win the competitions, congratulate them. If they have the highest GPA (again), praise them far and wide.

After all, what you reward is what you get. What you praise and acknowledge sends a loud and clear signal about what you value. It may make others cringe with frustration or envy. It also leaves them with a choice – stay behind or raise their game.

It's not selfish to want excellence. The greatest service that the high-performing fraternities and sororities can provide to their communities is to remain high-performing.

For the members reading this, if you have a racehorse that can win by 30 lengths, ride it for all it can give you. But, a little humility doesn’t hurt either (see the 2011 Miami Heat).

I will probably still always root for the underdog. It’s a much more compelling story. There is so much to learn from the grit and determination of someone who defies the odds. However, I’ll keep it as my goal to also appreciate shear brilliance when I see it. My enjoyment in the underdog should never give me reason to deny anybody or anything the chance to show their true excellence.

Go Secretariat!

Go!

Calvin and Hobbes on Excellence

noreply@blogger.com (John Shertzer) — Wed, 08 Jun 2011 20:52:00 +0000

Continuing a summer theme, some thoughts from Calvin and Hobbes (and me) on striving for excellence...

Do our expectations and standards sometimes allow for us to celebrate mediocrity? If so, what kind of effect does this have on our groups? Does excellence begin to mean "good enough?"

Does our propensity to always want to dress up our work result in us caring too much about how we show excellence, and not on how we achieve true excellence?

What is the motivation to be excellent? Are we so worn out by those underachieving, that we ignore those doing just enough to get by? What's the better use of time: helping a low performing group perform, or helping a performing group achieve excellence?

And my favorite...can excellence truly be relative? And if so, is their danger in that?

Just some thoughts from a truly excellent comic strip (thanks Mr. Waterson).

Who Believes in You?

noreply@blogger.com (John Shertzer) — Tue, 24 May 2011 17:06:00 +0000

To be or not to be…excellent. That is the question. I invite you to enjoy this classic clip from Wayne’s World 2:

This scene has great lessons for our organizations. We have just become too comfortable with mediocrity. Let’s face it, many of our organizations are striving to just reach mediocrity.

It’s easy to see in movies when actors or actresses are just “mailing it in.” The same is true for fraternities and sororities. It’s those groups that shuffle around from obligation to obligation, seemingly uninterested and lethargic. It’s the opposite of watching a master at work – someone who wants to, who needs to – be the greatest at their chosen craft. It’s whoever that first guy was vs. Charlton Heston.

It begs the question, however, what “being your best” or “performing at peak level” really means for fraternities and sororities.

Is being excellent as a fraternity winning campus competitions? That’s a pretty superficial measure I think. What about winning the highest honors from your national fraternity? I wonder if sometimes that is just a measure of one’s ability to write an application.

How about Ritual? Is living by the teachings of your Ritual achieving excellence as a fraternity? Yes – if excellence is doing exactly what’s expected of you.

Excellence can include all of these things, but they still don’t say enough. There seems to be an intangible quality to excellence, resulting in the old “I know it when I see it” test.

How about if excellence were this: getting others to believe in you. What if it meant performing in a manner that goes so far above an expected standard, that you become an aspiration for others.

Consider three sororities on a given campus. When interviewed about the first one, the university President states: “I like that sorority.” On the second, he comments “I trust that sorority.” On the third, he remarks “I believe in that sorority.” Each sorority is regarded as outstanding, but only one is excellent. It’s the one that changes the President’s perspective from “they simply exist” to “I want them to exist.” Or even, “I need them to exist.”

When someone like Charlton Heston steps in front of the camera, we believe in him. We know that a good performance will follow. In that scene, we wanted him in that role.

If you can get people – ranging from recruits to advisors – to say that they believe in you, then you know that you’re performing at a high level. And by the way, I can believe in a fraternity even if they don’t win a single Greek Week event.

So, what are you doing as an organization that would cause someone to say that they believe in you? Is your performance worth watching? Imagine the audience is filled with your founders, great alumni of the past, campus administrators, parents, etc. Would they stand and cheer for you? Would your performance move them to tears? Or, would they rather yank your fraternity and find a better stand-in?

When you believe in something, you protect it. You share it with others. It becomes a rock for you. It’s the same for how we cherish our own Rituals. What if others regarded fraternities as the “Ritual books” for the rest of society? As the place to turn to for leadership, scholarship, service, and other values.

That’s more than taking home a trophy. That’s knowing that you matter. Undeniably.

How much better would the fraternity movement, our organizations, and our members be if we no longer sought to just be tolerated, or liked, or accepted? What if we sought to be an aspiration for others? To do so much good that those around us could not avoid the desire to believe in us and what we’re doing. That would be, as they say in Wayne's World, excellent!

The next few essays from me are going to focus on the idea of excellence in fraternity and sorority life. In fact, I may devote the whole summer to the topic. If you have thoughts to share, please contact me or post in the comments.

The Giving Fraternity

noreply@blogger.com (John Shertzer) — Wed, 04 May 2011 14:21:00 +0000

Reprinted from May 2010

Congratulations to those graduating this year! You deserve to celebrate and reflect upon your achievements. I also invite you to understand that in regards to fraternity, it ain’t over. Not by a long shot.

The other night, my son Jack pulled Shel Silverstein’s The Giving Tree off his shelf. In this tale, a young boy develops a relationship with a large tree, climbing her, playing in her branches, incorporating her into his imaginary stories, and simply resting beside her large trunk. The tree loved the little boy and the boy loved the tree.

As the boy grew, his use for his beloved tree changed. Life circumstances drew him away from the tree, which saddened her. She would wait anxiously for his return, and through the book, we see him come back to her at pivotal times in his life. As a young man, he tells the tree that he needs money. She tells him that she has no money, but he can harvest her apples and sell them, which he does. Later, he returns as a middle-aged man, and tells her that he wants a house. She has no house to give, but encourages him to take her branches to build a house. He does. He comes back to her as an older man, with a desire to go far away from home – to sail somewhere free from problems. She offers her trunk so that he may build a boat, and he takes it. What’s left of the tree is a stump, still firmly rooted in the ground.

Each step along the way, when the boy would return and request more and more from the tree, she was excited to give him what he needed. Each time the boy would take something, the book tells us: “and the tree was happy.”

Many more years pass, and the boy returns as a very old man. The tree is excited to see him, but tells him that she has nothing left to provide – no apples, no branches, and no trunk. All she is, she tells him, is just a stump. The man tells her that he is too old to need anything but a place to rest his weary bones. The tree tells him that a stump is good for resting, and encourages him to come rest on her. He does.

And the tree was happy.

Consider this story as you prepare to leave your undergraduate years. These last few years in the fraternity or sorority were like the years the tree first spent with the little boy. The fraternity was excited to have you. It wanted you to use it for play, to learn critical lessons, to build the story of your life. Likewise, you loved and needed the fraternity. It’s “fruit” were the relationships you built with your brothers and sisters – relationships that became your family. It’s “branches” were the moments it gave you so that you could experience the carpe diem of college life. The “trunk” served as the memories that stay sturdy and strong as the rest of life moves on. The fraternity became a part of your life, and you, a part of hers.

So now you are an alum. Like the boy in the story, you’ll likely return to the fraternity or sorority for different needs as your life pivots and changes. You may ask her for things – and she will graciously give them to you. A fraternity is a selfless giver – always wanting her members to be happy and fulfilled. And we gladly take. We take her fruit, her branches, and her trunk. They help us navigate this crazy, awful, beautiful life. In return, we give her the joy of seeing her members live lives of significance. She doesn’t ask for anything else. But, that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t give her more. We can become the “giving tree” for her.

As an alum, you can give the fraternity the gift of mentorship. You can be a guide and a resource for new members. You can also give the fraternity the gift of your presence by attending national events, serving as an advisor, and contributing as an alumni leader. You can give the fraternity your treasure, donating to educational foundations and house corporations. You can do all of these things, and the fraternity will be better because of them.

But there is a gift even greater. There is a part of the fraternity that we haven’t yet discussed. In The Giving Tree, it’s the stump. It’s the part that is always there even after the rest is taken. It’s our Ritual. Our values. Our codes. Our oaths. Our declarations to be better men and women by living the core values of our fraternities. It was the greatest gift the fraternity gave you, and will continue to give you every day of your life.

And the greatest gift you can give her in return is to live her ritual every day. When you do, you honor her. When you don’t, you slight her.

Remember that your undergraduate years are only the beginning – and not the end. Your fraternity gave you a guide for how to live life to its fullest. When the many twists, turns, and bumps of life come your way, remember this gift. She will be there in the good times and the bad. She can help you build a marriage, raise a family, advance a career, and enhance the world. All you need to provide is integrity – a willingness to stay true to her teachings.

If you do, then your story may read like this:

After many years, the boy returned to the fraternity. She was so excited to see him that she could barely speak. The boy looked at the fraternity and spoke with conviction.

"I return today to thank you and tell you about the life you prepared me for. You gave so much to me, and I've tried to repay those gifts by living your values."

He continued. "You gave me the confidence to make hard decisions, and through my life I tried to always do what was right. You taught me the power of responsibility, and I was always true in my words and actions. Leadership is another gift you gave me, and because of you, I’ve always stepped forward when needed. You also gave me a chance to serve my fellow man, and I assure you that I haven’t stopped.”

“I stand more proudly because of you. I am kinder to others because you asked me to be. And I am rarely alone thanks to the extended family you helped me find. You gave me all of this, and more.”

“But I’m not sure that I have anything left to give,” the fraternity replied.

“All I want is a chance to read your Ritual once again.” said the boy.

“Then come, rest for a while, and read.” said the fraternity. “There are even more lessons to learn. You are not yet finished with this life; not yet finished giving."

After a while, as the boy set to leave, the fraternity spoke. “You honor me by giving," she said. Never stop sharing your unique gifts and my unique teachings with this world. Give. Give. Give.”

And the boy did.

And the fraternity was happy.

Retreats that Work

noreply@blogger.com (John Shertzer) — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 01:25:00 +0000

In last week’s post, I argued for more active learning in fraternity and sorority life. One of the vehicles for this kind of learning is the chapter retreat. I’m a big advocate for the organizational retreat. In an environment that is constantly shifting and changing, retreats are needed more than ever. They allow us to refocus on our mission and objectives. They can also unplug us from the gadgets that rule our lives. There is something about an easel pad, markers, and honest eye-to-eye conversation that is just simply healthy.

Now, retreats can also be a phenomenal waste of time. They require thoughtful planning in order to be effective. Below are five points I’ve learned about retreats over the years, and I encourage you to add your own.

Point #1: The retreat needs to be productive.

A retreat should never be all about play. A retreat can be fun, but it’s a work day. Going to the local amusement park is not a retreat. If your supply list includes bathing suits, koozies, and suntan lotion, it’s also not a retreat. A retreat is a learning activity, and should be treated as such. It’s out-of-the-classroom learning, so it is indeed different in many ways. But it’s still generally an intellectual exercise.

A brotherhood- or sisterhood-building social activity (such as rafting, camping, theme park, etc.) is fine, but “social activity” describes them accurately. Reserve “retreat” for the times in which participants are focused, ready to roll up their sleeves, and prepared to chart a better future for the organization. This doesn’t mean you sacrifice the teambuilding aspect. Don’t assume that brotherhood or sisterhood is built only through social events. In fact, the greatest teams are forged through collective action towards shared objectives. In other words, your “working” retreat will build greater connections and teamwork than any social activity could.

Point #2: It’s called a “retreat” for a reason. Go someplace different.

Brain science has proven that a change in venue can lead to a change in perspective. Retreats work best when participants feel that it is a special event, worthy of a different level of participation and thinking. A different venue can contribute to this feeling. Stay away from your chapter house, a classroom, or a meeting room in the student union. These are too ordinary. I personally encourage you to consider camps or other settings that incorporate nature. These types of venues can add a layer of calm and peacefulness to the event.

Any of the following are good options: Official retreat/conference centers, Boy Scout/Girl Scout/FFA/YMCA/Kiwanis camps, church facilities, restaurants with a unique feel, state parks, etc.

Cost might be a concern, but planning well advance will give you more options. Camps and parks are typically cheaper. Also consider distance and transportation when selecting a site.

Point #3: Your retreat needs a purpose.

Why do you need a retreat? Why is it being considered? What do you need to accomplish?

Identify and get problems out in the open.
Promote communication among all members.
Establish common goals and objectives.
Identify and relate the philosophy of the organization.
Transition new officers into their positions.
Have the members get to know each other on a deeper level.
Motivation; re-centering on purpose.
Discussion of values/Ritual.

Thinking about this beforehand will help you organize a retreat that best suits the members' needs. You could also plan a retreat that concentrates on one critical function of the organization, such as:

Recruitment Preparation - Educating members on effective recruitment and setting group recruitment goals.
Values Clarification - Helping participants understand themselves and others.
Leadership Development - Developing leadership skills to promote better committee members, committee chairs, or officers.
Risk Management - Teaching, clarifying, and gaining agreement on policies and procedures.
Scholastic Goal Setting - Giving members an opportunity to set personal and group goals in the area of academic achievement.
Pre/Post Initiation - Offering an opportunity for members to fully understand the impact of the oaths they are about to or have just taken.
Alumni Relations - Setting goals for improved alumni relations and programs. Gather suggestions from alumni or invite alumni to participate in this program.

Point #4: Beware the curse of the comfy couches.

Your retreat location should be comfortable, but that doesn’t mean you should sit all day. Full-day retreats commonly suffer from group malaise after lunch and as the afternoon carries on. Do as much as you can to make the retreat interactive, instead of a just a rotation of talking heads. Here are a couple of common tools for adding interactivity to a program:

The Partner Share: Instead of discussing a question or idea with the full group, ask participants to first talk about it with a fellow participant. This gives the quieter members a chance to share their ideas. After a few minutes, open it up for a larger discussion. You’ll likely get more and better responses.
The Small Group: Having ideas discussed in smaller groups of 5-8 participants works for many of the same reasons given above for the partner share. However, you can ask the small groups to accomplish more, such as solving one component of a larger question. For instance, if you are discussing academic achievement in the organization, you might assign smaller groups each of the following issues to discuss and make recommendations for: (1) recognizing academic achievement, (b) revising chapter academic standards, (c) utilizing campus resources, (d) programs to encourage academic success. You could also use small groups to teach a big topic, such as risk management policies. Assign small groups portions of the policies to review and teach back to the larger group in creative ways.

Breaking into smaller groups is also a great way to split up pledge classes, age groups, cliques, officers, new members, etc., which can add to the teambuilding element of the retreat.

Although they are often a target of complaints and groans, teambuilders and icebreakers can be effective for setting up a positive learning environment as well. You may get some evil glares from the participants, but weigh that against the boredom and lethargy that comes from inactivity. There are thousands of books and websites with ideas for teambuilders. The NIC resource “Brotherhood Building Activities” is one to add to your library, if it’s not already there. Also, your advisors and headquarters staff likely have a lot of options to share with you.

Point #5: You don’t need to do this alone.

The life of a Fraternity/Sorority Advisor can often be a constant deluge of negativity. They are always putting out fires and reacting to unfortunate incidents. Imagine a chapter leader walking into their office and inviting them to help facilitate a proactive retreat intent on building a stronger future for the fraternity or sorority. That’s the kind of work they want to be doing! The basic point is this – you have several caring individuals who would be willing to help you plan and implement the retreat. All you need to do is ask.

If you have a budget, there also many talented professional facilitators available to you.

I hope this has been helpful in some way. Leading, managing, and growing an organization like a fraternity or sorority is hard work. Going at it every single day can wear down even the greatest chapter. The strongest organizations know that in order to keep up their strength for the fight, on occasion, it’s necessary to retreat. Good luck!

Our Love Affair With Lectures

noreply@blogger.com (John Shertzer) — Thu, 21 Apr 2011 02:16:00 +0000

Why is the lecture so cool again?

I mean, I thought we were working towards banishment of this age-old crotchety form of education. The era of the one-way teacher-centered face-forward podium-and-powerpoint education was to be replaced by a new era of two-way, student-centered, sit-in-a-circle, flip charts-and-facilitation education. Yet, the lecture seems to be growing in strength.

This essay isn’t about classrooms, where the lecture is still the preferred method (unfortunately). Not much we can do with that. It’s about our choices in student affairs.

Higher education is following a societal trend back towards lecture-based learning. Every other minute of every single day I’m receiving an e-mail or a Facebook message directing me to the latest TED talk. TED is a group of conferences that feature 18-minute lectures by renowned experts. The talks are often shared online, and they can definitely be engaging. However, they are still a classic lecture: a sage-on-a-stage imparting their ideas and knowledge on a passive audience.

Quick tangent: what’s with our country’s fascination with the British accent? It’s a cool accent for sure, but it seems like every expert on TV, radio, or TED has a British accent. I bet 30% of them are faking it.

Maybe I should start writing these posts in a British accent.

As opposed to academia, student affairs has often been the locus for different methods of education, including experiential learning and institute-style programs. Student affairs was the place where real-life learning took place. We rescued students from the suffocating confines of the classroom and gave them a way to actually get involved in the learning.

Experiential learning is essentially making meaning from a direct experience. It involves a real or simulated experience along with analysis, reflection, and applied learning.

An institute-style experience is one that involves a progessively challenging curriculum that all learners experience. It typically involves facilitated discussions on core concepts followed by processing in smaller groups. It can also usually be marked by a longer duration - such as five or six days. LeaderShape and UIFI are great examples. So is Key Leader - a Kiwanis program for high school students.

Obviously the lecture is different from these in that it typically features a single expert transferring knowledge in a one-way fashion to an audience of learners. The problem with this approach is that without the chance to do something, learn from it, and apply it, we have a tendency to struggle with using the information. In a lecture, we may remember the core lesson, but not know how to apply it.

If I asked you to recall the last TED talk you watched online, you could probably recite the primary points. If I asked you how you’ve used the core points in your leadership, I’m guessing most of you would not have much of an answer. Without active practice, not much can be expected. It’s like watching a instructional video on baseball without swinging a bat.

One of my favorite speakers/lecturers, Jeff Cufaude once described the typical keynote speech as one that starts with a humorous story, contains 3 main points that are easily comprehended, extremely benign, and quickly forgotten, and closes with an inspirational story or poem. It’s the truth.

And I fear we are relying to much on those. We’re even getting so excited about lectures again that some national conferences for college students are including TED-like mini lectures as a prominent feature. Also, the professional speaking circuit is as big an influential as ever before.

Professional speakers can fall into the “lecture” category simply because their format doesn’t allow for much meaningful interaction. The audiences are usually large, with rows of chairs facing straight ahead towards the expert speaker. They really can’t be deeply interactive (and asking the audience to stand and do a cheer does not make the program interactive).

But do they need to be interactive? That’s not the purpose of a lecture. The purpose again is to transfer knowledge from an expert to the audience. And that's okay if that's the purpose. Most good speakers (hello T.J., Rick, Ox, Stollman, Phired Up, and others) use techniques to transfer that knowledge in a more interesting way - mostly through humor and stories.

So why use a lecture-based program at all? A few reasons:

It may be most important for you to get a single idea across to a large group of people (such as risk management).
You need “edu-tainment” to kick off a big event such as orientation, an awards night, or Greek Week.
You don’t have time to plan something more involved.

These programs can be compelling, buzzworthy, and cause individuals to gain a new perspective. However, if you really want to create change, I encourage you to go experiential or institute-style. What does that mean? It means full-weekend retreats instead of 60-minute keynotes. It means facilitated small group conversations instead of big auditorium events. It means role plays instead of movies. Scenarios instead of articles. Full semester leadership classes instead of workshops.

There are times and places for lectures. I love hearing good professional speakers. And you can occasionally grab a lesson from them that sticks with you. For example, Ed King flipped my perspective upside-down (in a positive way) on the role of Ritual in fraternity. Dave Westol forever shaped my thoughts on hazing. T.J. and Joel caused me to care more about H.I.V. and AIDS.

However, don’t rely on these speeches too much. While they can be a spark, expecting them to change your Greek community is like expecting a diet pill to take the weight off for you. The same could be said for blogs by the way!

Also, look at your budget. What’s the best return on investment? How can that $3000 go the furthest?

The problem is that experiential learning or institute-style programs take more effort to coordinate. Those that are planned poorly can be a waste of valuable time for students. But, if the objective of education is to provide information that leads to new behaviors or actions, these methods are the best way to go. They provide the learner a chance to actually practice leadership. They hold up a mirror to each participant and ask him/her to question their own assumptions. They push students hard on questions of ethics and integrity. They demand more from the students than sitting in an auditorium chair.

So, I encourage you to look at your campus’s educational offerings in a holistic way and to find a place for more institutes and experiential programs.

And to help, next week I’ll share some thoughts on how to make the classic retreat a really effective experience.

Until then, I’m going to work on my British accent. Cheerio!

Greetings From Behind the Podium

noreply@blogger.com (John Shertzer) — Wed, 06 Apr 2011 12:56:00 +0000

Guest essay by a recent college graduate

The author of this post wrote the following after reading a previous post of mine: Greetings from the Back Row. He wanted to add the perspective from the other side of the room, so to speak. This post is an honest reflection of this author's recent fraternity experience - hence its more personal feel in comparison with mine (and his wish to remain anonymous). The author graduated last May. He became a founding father his freshman year, vice-president for two years, and president for one. He tries his best to remain involved with his colony (soon to be chapter) and his organization as a whole as much as he possibly can. -- John

I’m the brother you are going to miss. I’m the go-getter. The one that rallies the troops before a big event and makes sure that all of the t’s and i’s are crossed and dotted before it starts. I’m there to drive you home and I’m there to pick you back up when you fall. When your parents come to town I’m the brother you introduce them to so that they keep the checks for dues coming and don’t feel like you are wasting their time and money. I’m the first one to get to chapter meetings and the last one to leave.

I’m Mr. Involved. I’m Fraternity Man of the Year. Better yet, I’m Brother of the Year.

But let me tell you how I came to be this way. I honestly had no intention of joining a fraternity. When I walked the university’s involvement fair my freshman year I was lost in a sea of people that I didn’t know. Granted, I played sports and was involved a lot in high school, but I was more of a “behind the scenes” kind of person. I never wanted to step into the limelight. I’ve always been very loyal and committed to anything that I do but never did things for the glory. I walked past the fraternity’s table and saw a bunch of guys that would rather be someplace else, anywhere but stuck there having to talk to freshmen. I saw where I could make a difference. Make an impact.

I started off holding any position that I could. Attending every event that I could. Volunteering for whatever I could get my hands on. Everyone, even my pledge class brothers, soon called me “super pledge." Brothers showed me off to the sororities like a prize won at the fair and always let me slide whenever I messed up. I soon found a liking for being involved and started running for committee chairs, and winning. Everyone liked me - or so I thought - because I brought a lot of passion to everything I did. Most seemed to like my ideas, except those that felt their “fun” was in jeopardy. But I ignored the critics because my intentions were good. I wanted to make us better. To make us The Best.

I worked my way up and ran for my first executive board position - and won. I was eager to participate. I actually felt like I was starting to matter and that people had respect for me; that people liked me. I started to enjoy the limelight. Other entities on campus took notice of me and asked me to get involved with them also and I did. I figured it would make the fraternity look better in the end. But then a series of things began to happen.

My grades started to slip. I started to notice that I wasn’t “superman” and couldn’t do it all on my own. I soon realized that I had nowhere to turn to and no one to ask for help. I had taken on too much and was over-involved. Everyone expected me to do it all. To plan everything. To make sure people follow the rules. To keep in touch with everyone. To do each person’s position for them. It’s what I had done in the beginning so why should things change now?

The brothers started to doubt my intentions - and doubt me for that matter. They began to question what I had in mind for the organization and my dedication. I started to grow bitter. It was me who had worked behind the scenes while everyone else was out partying to make sure that our organization didn’t sink to the bottom. I skipped social events so that I could catch up on schoolwork missed because of covering everyone else’s bases. But no one noticed the fact that I was doing the work of many, just that I wasn’t in attendance at social events. They didn’t know what it felt like to be all alone when I was getting phone calls from administrators. No one was standing next to me when I had to meet with the Greek Life advisor in the aftermath of whatever trouble some brothers caused, so that I could try to explain their actions, make excuses for them, and promise to handle it.

It doesn’t help matters that after reviewing manuals from our headquarters I realized that we were doing everything wrong. Meetings were being run the wrong way. Reports were done incorrectly. To make matters worse our image on campus was atrocious. No one respected us. Our recruitment numbers declined. Our GPA fell. But when I started to make some changes, whether small or big, brothers started to take a stand against me. There were things that we should have been doing all along but since I was going against our “traditions” brothers started to talk about me behind my back, fight the entire process, or worse, drop their membership. Think of a hot plate pulled out of the dishwasher and put into cold water. Too much, too fast.

All I really wanted was for us to start doing things right. The way that our founders and executive council members wanted us to. You know, simple stuff like be respected on campus, follow our values, and live our ritual.

It doesn’t help matters that I would get emails, phone calls, or text messages from brothers filled with hatred because they didn’t like having to go in front of the judicial board. Or were mad because I didn’t beg them to stay active as they threatened to leave. Others started to lash out and tried to tear down everything I attempted to instill in our organization. I started to feel more alone. I started to question what I was doing this for. I started to wonder why I was still involved or even still a brother in the first place.

All because of what? Starting to hold them accountable? Starting to expect them to live our ritual? What happened to the days of “super pledge?”

Once my position’s tenure was over I disappeared. I retreated back to being the behind the scenes guy. And I found myself in the back row at meetings, whenever I did attend. Even sitting behind the guys that disrupted them on purpose. Younger and newer brothers wondered who I was at times. My legacy was gone. I found excuses and reasons to avoid going to any meetings or events. I blamed it on being a senior and being busy. I have been counting down the time until today, when I get to walk across this stage. Some brothers have started to notice what I accomplished for the fraternity. Others’ respect for me has started to recover after realizing all that I did.

Today, I’m not sitting with any of the brothers that are also graduating. I’m sitting with the people I made friends with outside of the fraternity. They don’t dislike me because I asked too much of them. They can’t resent me for following or believing in a shared ritual. They were there for me when my brothers couldn’t be. Refused to be. When I stood on homecoming court representing the fraternity at the big game, they were the ones that cheered me on when not a single brother was in sight.

The funny thing is, I joined a fraternity because I wanted to make friends. You know, the kind where one day their kids call me “uncle” even though we don’t share a single gene. The jury is still out on that one.

As a disclaimer, I’m not looking for you to feel sorry for me. I brought it on myself. I could have backed down and let them push me around. Even resigned from the position. But I don’t think that’s what our founders would have wanted, so I stuck with it. If I didn’t believe in living the ritual then who was going to? In fact, through all of the opposition that I faced, it made my love for the organization itself grow stronger. Why else would I be wearing my organization’s graduation stoles today?

I just wanted you to see how things feel for someone like me, the one behind the podium. I sacrificed a social life, time that I’ll never get back, and even my G.P.A. I’m sure my family would love to hear Latin terms pronounced after my name today as I graduate, but hopefully they understand. I’m just hoping and asking that you take it easy on the next “go-getter” coming up behind me. To know what it felt like for me so he doesn’t have to go through what I did.

Maybe you can keep him from getting burned out. Maybe from time to time you could pretend that you want to be at a community service event as much as the next mixer. Maybe you’ll spend as much time planning our philanthropies as you do your parties. Maybe you’ll realize that those letters you’re wearing on your chest are mine too. To an outsider, you don't only represent yourself. You represent me. Our school. Our organization. Our founders. Our Ritual.

I’m sure he would appreciate that.

I don’t want you to think that as I sit here waiting for them to call my name that I’m bitter or resentful. I fact, I happen to not regret a single thing I did for our organization. It’s an experience that I would recommend and encourage to anyone. It made me a better person. I hope to one day receive a phone call from my son or daughter saying that they are thinking about becoming Greek. I just hope that maybe one day you’ll realize that my actions were for good. That I had your and our organization’s best interests at heart. That I’m still here for you because that’s what brothers do. It’s a realization and hope that I’m willing to wait around for.

A Picture of Fraternity

noreply@blogger.com (John Shertzer) — Wed, 30 Mar 2011 01:45:00 +0000

I was recently part of a program in which the facilitator distributed several cards with compelling photographs on them. He asked us to choose a single picture that stood out to us for whatever reason, and draw a connection between that picture and our experience at the program. It was a really fun activity, and it was also fascinating to hear the truly creative interpretations of the pictures by the other participants. Metaphors and analogies are powerful ways to creatively explore all kinds of issues and to reach possibilities we might not otherwise find.

At your next chapter retreat, staff meeting, or council meeting, take out a stack of interesting pictures, distribute them, and ask those attending the meeting to make a connection between the picture at the current state of the organization. Or, ask them to share how the picture symbolizes the future they want to see. Or better yet, their contributions to that future.

Given this blog's primary subject matter, let's play this out with fraternity. Below are several images. Choose one that symbolizes for you what fraternity means, and one that symbolizes your beliefs about the future of the fraternity movement. Ask your brothers or sisters to do the same. Feel free to use the pictures below (they are public domain) to start a creative thinking process in your organization.

And, if you are so bold, feel free to write about your own reflections on a particular image in the comments section below so we can all learn from each other.

Here's one from me. Like fraternity, this image reflects mystery and wonder. Many observers cannot explain what exactly it is. However, it is still admired and respected because it has stood the test of time. People gravitate to this structure because they want to be connected to something bigger than themselves - something they don't quite understand but know is special. Our sustained future will require many things, and one of the most important is that we retain this sense of uniqueness.

Fraternity is Like a Baseball Game

noreply@blogger.com (John Shertzer) — Wed, 16 Mar 2011 12:24:00 +0000

The impending arrival of April signals the return of America’s pastime, the great sport of baseball. There’s nothing like the smell of freshly cut grass joined together with the aroma of roasted peanuts. The silence of winter is broken by the sound of a THWACK as wood bat meets cowhide ball, and the WHUMP of a fist pounding a freshly oiled glove until it’s ready to field a grounder.

I love baseball for many reasons, including its lessons about life, leadership, and fraternity. Here are a few:

Moments of Consequence
While baseball is a team sport, it is full of moments of individual consequence. Whereas in some team sports (e.g., soccer) it’s easy to be anonymous and hidden in lieu of the team, individuals often take center stage in baseball. There are moments when a player can try to hide (think little league right-fielders), but they can’t stay hidden forever. At some point, it will be their turn and they’ll stand at home plate with a bat in hand and the world watching. And chances are for that batter, it will end badly. A good batting average is .300. This means that a great batter will strike out two-thirds of the time!

And so, while a player will have many moments when he makes contact with the ball and gets on base or even drives in a run, that same player will have more moments when he will take a long slow walk back to the dugout in defeated silence. He let down his team. It’s gut-wrenching. Learning to handle that defeat and be resilient is one of the best character lessons baseball can teach.

In fraternity, there are also moments of consequence; moments when the fraternity is counting on an individual player. The intensity of the fraternity or sorority experience can create those gut-wrenching moments because you just don’t want to let your brothers or sisters down. It could be falling short on a project, failing to meet academic standards, or making an unethical and haunting choice.

Of course, there will be moments of glorious success when a member can trot the bases as applause thunders around him. But how about those times in which he fails? How does he show his character in those moments?

Moments of Glory, Moments of Sacrifice
It’s the bottom of the ninth inning with the score tied and two outs. The star player comes to bat and the crowd is shouting for him to send the ball over the left field fence. He obliges and launches a huge home run that wins the game. The crowd goes wild as he soaks in the glory of a momentous occasion.

It’s the next night. Again, it’s the bottom of the ninth inning, with the score tied and a runner on first. There are no outs. Th star player comes to bat and the crowd is shouting for him to send the baseball over the left field fence again. As the first pitch comes, the star player crouches down and bunts to ball only a few feet in front of the plate. It’s an easy out for the catcher who throws the ball to first. Meanwhile, the runner who was on first was able to make it to second. He is now in scoring position, meaning that all it takes is a base hit to bring him home.

The star player did the furthest thing from hitting a home run, but the crowd still applauds loudly as he returns to the dugout. Why? He just sacrificed his success so that the team had a better chance to win.

The next batter gets a base hit, the runner scores, and the game is won.

A fraternity can be a wonderful vehicle for individual achievement and glory. In fact, there is no sweeter feeling than succeeding in the company of your brothers or sisters.

A fraternity can also be a wonderful vehicle for invidual sacrifice. We all take an oath to an organization that we are expected to care for. Fraternity helps us learn the power and satisfaction of contributing to a cause greater than our own self interests.

In short, there will be times to bunt and times to knock it out of the park.

Many Different Strengths Lead to Success
Babe Ruth, widely considered to be the best baseball player ever, had a body type closer to mine than Bo Jackson, and that’s not a compliment. Baseball players succeed for many different reasons, all based upon the strengths they bring to the team. Some, like Ricky Henderson, use lightning quick speed to be a terror on the bases. Some, like Cecil Fielder, are as big as a sumo wrestler and can hit a ball into the next county. Others, like Derek Jeter, use their reflexes to field any ball that comes their way. And even others, like Cal Ripken, Jr. have such good hand-eye coordination that they rarely strike out.

A good manager will use players with particular strengths at opportune times. If he needs a runner to steal a base, he bring in a speedy pinch runner. If a left-handed pitcher has a better chance of striking out the batter, he’ll call to the bullpen.

There is also a science to how managers make out their batting order so that strengths are maximized.

In the same way, good fraternities allow their members to use their strengths as much as possible. Those skilled at the art of conversation are on the front lines for recruitment. Those who have strong fiscal sense excel as Treasurers. Good writers can put together newsletters for the organization. There is no singular skill set for a good fraternity member.

The Moments Between the Action
One of the primary reasons I love baseball as I grow older is the pace of play. This is also why so many people hate baseball. I admit, it can move pretty slow. But, at some point in your life, you may agree with me that slow is something to cherish.

The slow moments are often the times when friendship is strengthened. When you watch a baseball game, pay attention to when the cameras turn to the pitchers in the bullpen. It’s rare when they aren’t smiling or laughing as they pass the time waiting for their turn. The same can be said for the dugouts. Camaraderie is very evident in baseball.

And there is a reason why baseball is still the best spectator sport for families and friends. There is little to do between innings than to turn to that person sitting beside you in the tight quarters of a ballpark and just talk with them. Fathers and mothers and sons and daughters and friends and neighbors taking the time for conversation. Oh, how we need that more than ever.

The undergraduate fraternity experience is much more fast-paced than most people want or expect. There is much to be gained by cherishing the moments “between innings” when there is nothing more to do than to sit next to a brother or sister and talk about life.

For life, like a baseball game, is meant to be savored.

So, those are a few reasons why I love baseball and even believe it should be considered the official sport of fraternity. But, I’m biased. It should be noted that baseball certainly has its share of problems as well. The whole steroids issue is a sticky one, and I wrote about it a couple of years ago.

Despite those challenges, I will continue to watch and observe the great lessons the game can teach us. Count me among those who get a little extra spring in their step as the air gets warmer, the skies get bluer, and baseball players across the land take the field.

Oh, and GO TIGERS!