Free Dating Advice

Today's Dating Tip - Flirting (Part 2)

2005-04-06T11:48:00.000-04:00

Sorry it's been so long, had some personal family problems - but - I'm back!

Today let's deal with the second part of our mini series on flirting. As we learned in the last post flirting can be as simple as flashing a smile. Today, let's . . .

Reach Out and Touch Someone

Touching someone in a non-intrusive way is a a great way to signal your interest. Now I don't mean grabbing or hitting someone. Be gentle. Be smooth. Be subtle.

Take her hand in yours, and ask where she got the beautiful ring. Gently touch her shoulder or back when you are walking behind her to sit down. Softly rub her arm and ask what type of material her lovely sweater is made from. . .

You get the idea. Touching her gently signals your interest but if she pulls away or flinches don't do it again!

Flirting is a fun way to 'break the ice' and it can lead to lots of dating fun. Try it - you'll like it.

Happy dating,
Ellen

PS: Thanks to all of you that have signed up for my Free series, "What do Women Really Want?" I'm really encourage by all the positive feedback I've been getting.

Today's Dating Tip - Flirting (Part 1)

2005-03-09T09:28:00.000-05:00

Todays free dating tip is all about flirting. Everyone knows about flirting and has seen it done but many people simply don't know how to do it. Here are a couple of things that anyone can do:

Smile. That's right smile. It's easy and it conveys a world of information. Smiling at someone makes them feel at ease. Normally when you meet someone new, there is a moment of hestitation. It's natural to hold back just a little until you get some kind of sign from the person. The best sign to get (and to give) is a smile.

Todays Dating Tip: Smile - It's Easy, Free and it Works!
Smiling at someone tells them that you are pleased to see them, that you are happy, friendly and confident. It tells people that you are relaxed and glad to see them but more than that it lets people know that you aren't nervous, distracted or upset. Not smiling when you meet someone sends off all kinds of different information and none of it is positive! Work on your smile - it will pay off for you.

The second part of todays dating tip is to get caught looking. That's right - get caught!

Most people will see someone that they are attracted to, then take a quick look at that person only to turn away when the object of their desire looks at them. If you really want to let that person know you are interested, when she catches you looking, smile, hold eye contact a moment longer, then look away.

Letting yourself get caught shows that you are confident and that you aren't like the guys that look away because they are embarassed. Getting caught shows that you're interested and you are interested, right?

Get out there and flirt with someone today. It's free. It's fun. You could meet someone great!

Happy dating,
Ellen

PS: Be sure to return for Dating Tips - Flirting (Part 2) coming soon and remember, you can Date Any Woman

What do Women Really Want?

2005-03-03T23:55:00.000-05:00

What do women really want? That's a question that has troubled men for hundreds of years. It's been the subject of many books and a movie that featured Mel Gibson.

You've probably wondered exactly what women want at various times of your life. I know that I've heard lots of guys ask the question. For years my own brother tried in vain to find the answer.

Finding the answer to that question is almost impossible - unless you have some help. I'm here to provide the free dating advice,, so I thought I'd take some time, talk to some of my girlfriends and put together a small report for your benefit. Interestingly, I've called it "What Do Women Really Want?", and it's totally free! Look for it soon, here on 'Free Dating Advice'.

Happy dating,
Ellen

How's Your 'Look'?

2005-02-23T10:41:00.000-05:00

If you've read any of the previous articles here, you'll know that I don't worry too much about what a guy looks like. In fact, in my guide to successful dating, (shameless plug - Date Any Woman) I tell guys that looks aren't important. (OK, if you're Sean Penn or Tom Cruise you've got an edge!)

The point is that unless you're considering plastic surgery (perish the thought) you really can't do much about the way you look. Having said that, here are some things that every guy can do to improve his 'look'.

*** Get a decent hair cut. Wash it and keep it looking good. This is just part of good hygene. No dirty finger nails, stuff in your teeth or B.O.! Got it?

*** Work on your wardrobe. Your out of college and have a job - dress appropriately. If you aren't in school anymore, lose the 'frat boy' look. Spend some of that money you're making and buy some nice clothes. T-shirts, sweats and old running shoes - YUCK!

*** Get a decent pair of shoes and look after them. One of the first things a woman notices about a man is his shoes. If they are old, worn out or dirty they'll set off alarm bells in just about every woman you meet. If you can't take care of your shoes, how are you going to take care of us?

Please understand that these dating tips apply to ALL men! Looks aren't important to most women . . . . but your 'look' is important. Is your closet full of stuff from the '80's? Does your haircut match your closet? Step out of your comfort zone and make some changes. You'll see results immediately.

Happy dating,
Ellen

Valentines Day Dating Grinch

2005-02-13T00:49:00.000-05:00

That's who I am - the Valentines Day Dating Grinch! Now, perhaps you feel that I should be writing something here to tell you how to have the best Valentines Day ever. You might be looking for me to tell you how to get that special someone to go out with you on Valentines Day. Sorry - it's not going to happen. Not today - not ever!

You see, I think that Valentines Day is just an excuse for the florists and candy makers to sell their merchandise. It's a day for the merchants and not for the people.

Now, don't get me wrong. It's really nice to get flowers and other gifts on Valentines Day. The point here is that I want a man that doesn't have to wait until Valentines Day to bring me flowers. Surprise me, delight me and make me happy ANY day of the year! There isn't a woman alive that doesn't like to be told that she's special. If you do it, just because you want to, then nothing is too good for you!

Be smart enough and creative enough to know that you don't have to wait for a number on a calendar to do something nice. Be that guy all year round and you'll never want for female company.

Happy dating,
Ellen

PS: I truly hope that you have a great Valentines Day!

Go Shopping for a Date

2005-02-07T08:23:00.000-05:00

If you've read my last dating tip, you'll know that I'm not fond of the 'dinner and a movie' thing for a first date. Your first date should be all about getting to know each other and this is hard to do while watching a movie.

I gave you a few alternatives, but one that I had forgotten about is to just go shopping! No, I haven't lost my mind. I didn't have too much to drink while watching the Super Bowl! Read on - this really works . . . .

Lets say you are in a mall and you see a woman you'd like to meet. Assuming that she's well dressed, you walk over, smile and say, "Hi, I couldn't help but notice how great your outfit/dress/sweater etc. looks. Did you pick it out yourself?"

If she answers yes and smiles back, you can say, "I know this may seem a bit odd, but I'm kind of backward when it comes to fashion, in fact I don't think I have much fashion sense at all - I wonder if you could help me?"

"You see, I really need a new tie/shirt/sportscoat etc. If you have a few minutes, do you think you could help me pick out something nice? By the way, my name is John . . "

Let's recap: You've approached someone you're attracted to, complimented them and asked for their help. If they agree, you can spend some time together shopping and getting to know her. If she really does help you find something nice, it would only be fair for you to buy her a coffee or something, wouldn't it? After spending some time together, and it's clear that she likes you, it will be natural for you to say, "I'd really like to see you again, what would be a good time to call?" She'll answer, "I'm usually home after 6:00, but you don't have my number - it's 555-5566."

Now, I know that things won't always go this smoothly. But if she says "No" and won't help you out, then she probably isn't someone you want to know anyway. Also, if she does say no - all you've lost is a minute of your time.

One important thing to note is that if she picks out something for you - you MUST be prepared to buy it! If you don't, you are insulting her taste and that will ruin any chance you had. Remember, if you really don't like whatever she selects, buy it anyway, you can always return it!

See guys, shopping can be fun. Getting a date in a mall - who knew? Oh, and did I mention that the malls are always full of women?

Happy dating,
Ellen

Remember, you can Date Any Woman

Dating Ideas - Part 1

2005-02-02T09:43:00.000-05:00

So, you were in a book store and you met this really great person (or so you think) and you've had coffee together and it's time to go on a date. But, where to go?

Now some people would suggest dinner and a movie. Don't do it. At this stage of the game you don't know nearly enough about the other person to make this idea work. You don't know their taste in food or entertainment at this point and movies don't allow you to talk and get to know the other person.

Dates can be traumatic and nerve-racking at the best of times so don’t make it harder on either of you than necessary. There are some great places to take a date that won’t cost you too much, will give you just enough time to talk to each other, and will also provide an entertaining distraction.

Museums, art shows, or a picnic in a park are all simple inexpensive things that will really give you a chance to get to know each other. Be a little creative. Put some thought into it. You'll be glad you did!

Happy dating,
Ellen

Get Your Dating Advice from a Cabbie!

2005-02-01T21:10:00.000-05:00

So, you're desperate - you haven't had a date in months - and even worse than that, is the fact that you have zero prospects! Maybe you should go for a ride in a taxi . . . You might want to, if the cab is being driven by Ahmed Ibrahim.

You see, Ibrahim is a rather unique matchmaker. He matches up the riders in his cab, with other riders.

"New York is a very tough city for dating," Ibrahim mused while driving through the West Village recently. "I have heard a lot of crying in this cab, a lot of fighting and a lot of broken hearts."

"Sometimes great people were just missing each other by minutes; one would get in my cab just as another had gotten out," he said.

It started out as a bit of a prank,"I was joking around with this girl ... who said she couldn't find a boyfriend," he recalled. Ibrahim took her number.

Three days later, a man got in his cab and bemoaned his bad luck finding a woman. Ibrahim called the woman and gave her the man's number. Three weeks later, she called back and said they had gone on a date and were getting along great.

"I thought, 'Oh my God, this is my new project,' " he said.

Ibrahim now sets up about eight couples a week. He does it just for fun. "I hope I can accomplish a few marriages," he said. "I'm an old-fashioned guy."

Ibrahim, who is divorced, says, "Marriage is not for me." But he is dating these days - a girl that he met in his cab!

The Art of the Compliment

2005-01-02T23:56:00.000-05:00

Hi everybody, I'm back from holiday, I've got some great new dating tips and I'm going to begin with the art of the compliment.

Recently I was at a club and this guy approaches me and starts to tell me 'what beautiful eyes I have'.

So, I turned away from him and asked , "What color are they?" He didn't know. Another stupid BS artist shot down!

Here's the deal. EVERY woman has been told she has beautiful eyes. It's what guys say when they can't think of anything else to compliment. So, here is dating tip #1 for today - Don't compliment a woman on her eyes. Ever.

Find something about the way she dresses, the clothes or the jewelry she's wearing. Be specific. For example, don't say "I like your boots.", say "You have great taste in clothes, I especially like the color of your boots and the way they match your pants." When you are specific, women will realize that you are really interested. So, dating tip #2 for today is - When complimenting a woman, be specific.

Dating tip #3 for today is - do it more. All women love to be complimented. Practice on your sister, mother or someone you work with. It is easy - just do it.

To conclude: Be specific and learn to really compliment a woman in a way that she'll appreciate.

A Dating Tip for Women

2004-12-22T09:35:00.000-05:00

Todays dating tip is for women and it's particularly for women that think 'all men are jerks'. I started thinking about this after hearing a good friend of mine say that all the guys she's dating these days are turning out to be jerks. Hmmmmmmm. . . .

So, I asked her where she had met these guys and she told me that she met the last guy at a car show and the one before that in a sports bar. Well duh!

I said, "You don't like cars and you really don't like sports. So what did you expect to have in common with these guys?"

The answer is nothing. Most dating 'gurus' (I hate that word!) tell you to go where the men are. Go somewhere that guys hang out so that you can meet guys. Sorry to say, but that is bad advice. Going where the guys are will certainly get you guys - but not the kind of guys that you are interested in.

I don't know who coined the phrase 'opposites attract' but unless he was talking about magnets, he was a fool. Here's a good dating tip for both men and women:

"People like people, that are like themselves"

Go to a place where there is a good chance of meeting people that have similar interests. If you like dancing, go dancing or take lessons. If you like hiking, join a hiking club. If you like movies, go to a film festival etc. etc.

Don't just find anyone, find someone that is like you. Now, get out there and have some fun.

Happy dating,
Ellen

Good Dating and Bad Dating

2004-12-19T21:46:00.000-05:00

OK, I know that this post doesn't contain any information that could be considered "Free Dating Advice" It does however contain dating information with regard to a TV show that I love.

If you have ever seen the show 'Coupling' (WNED, Saturdays @11:00PM)you'll know what I love about it. It's bawdy, sexy and sometimes a little rude. This British show is dating at its best and worst. Can you really learn any dating tips from this show? I'm not sure. Can you have a really good laugh? You bet!

Happy dating,
Ellen

Remember, you can Date Any Woman

A Dating Tip in One Word - Gimmick!

2004-12-16T09:54:00.000-05:00

Anyone that knows me, knows that I love dating gimmicks. I write about them extensively in Date Any Woman and now I've found the absolute best gimmick!

For those of you that don't know, a gimmick is just a way to get other people, men or women to approach you. When they approach you, there is no danger of you getting shot down. This makes meeting people very easy and removes much of the fear associated with being rejected.

Specifically, a gimmick could be a card trick, a bar trick, palm reading or any number of other attention getting ideas. But as I said earlier, I've found the best gimmick. Its called the 20Q and its a pocket sized electronic version of the old 20 questions game. All you have to do is take it with you to your local bar or club and start playing with it. Soon you'll have a crowd around you - all wanting to play! Can you spell instant popularity?

The 20Q is available here 20Q and it's less than $20.00. Get one today - you'll be amazed at the results.

Happy dating,
Ellen

Remember, you can Date Any Woman

OOOOPS - I almost forgot to tell you to type 20Q in the search box in the top left side of the page. That will take you directly to the page with the 20Q.

Learn from "Blind Date"

2004-12-15T10:34:00.000-05:00

If you've ever watched the television program "Blind Date", then you'll understand this post completely. If you haven't seen it, the cameras follow along with a couple on their blind date and comments on the date are provided by the host, Roger Lodge.

Some of the men and women are upbeat and really seem ready for fun. These dates usually turn out well. The clue here is that most of us like to be with people that are fun, energetic and have a positive attitude. Do you?

What was your last date like? Were you energetic, positive and outgoing or were you tentative, quiet and shy? How did that date end up? There is a relationship between your attitude and your dating success. Sure, the other person could be a total dud and nothing you could do would make an impression. However, in most dating situations, attitude is important.

So, how do you get a good attitude? For me, I just tell myself to do it! Sound stupid to you? Most people dread going to work. They don't want to be there and some days neither do I. So just before I go to work I tell myself - "Be happy, have fun, enjoy yourself!" It really does change my entire attitude. Just do this simple thing before you go on a date. Commit yourself to having a good time. Make that fun, positve person in you come out. Change your own attitude and watch how great your dates turn out!

Happy dating,
Ellen
Remember, you can Date Any Woman

Looking Good? Dating Tip #4

2004-12-13T22:03:00.000-05:00

Back at Dating Tip #1 I explained that women care about how you make them feel. If you make them feel beautiful, safe, protected, sexy etc. - they are going to like you. I know that some guys aren't going to believe it but looks are not that important! Sure, you want to look well groomed and nicely dressed but more than that you have to realize that nobody is perfect.

If you think that you can't succeed with women because of your looks, then think about this:

If Lyle Lovette can get Julie Roberts...there is hope for everyone!

Ellen,
You can, Date Any Woman

Confidence is a Vicious Circle - Dating Tip #3

2004-12-13T19:55:00.000-05:00

So, you can't get a date? Why not? Chances are it's because you lack confidence. If you didn't already know . . . women love men that exude confidence. They are attracted to men that are confident.

So, how do you get to be confident? Simple - do something! The only way to become more confident is to succeed at something and the only way to succeed at something is to do something. Even if you fail, you'll at least have an opportunity to learn from the experience.

If you approach a woman and get shot down - at least you tried. So why did she shoot you down? Was it your approach? Was it your body language or was it the fact that you haven't had a shower in a week? Think it over and learn from it.

In the dating world, not having confidence is a vicious circle. No confidence means no dates which guarantees no confidence. However, and this is important - once you have confidence, you'll get dates and the more dates you have, the more confident you'll become! So, todays dating tip is get out there, have some fun and build your confidence.

Ellen
Remember, you can Date Any Woman

Do You Know Her Favorite Flower?- Dating Tip #2

2004-12-10T14:26:00.000-05:00

While attending a Marriage Seminar dealing with communication Tom and his wife, Grace, listened to the instructor, It is essential that husbands and wives know the things that are important to each other. He addressed the man, Can you describe your wife's favorite flower? Tom leaned over, touched his wife's arm gently and whispered, It's Robin Hood, isn't it?

The rest of the story gets rather ugly, so I'll stop right here.

This is just a little humor to illustrate the power of communication from the previous post. You do know that Robin Hood is 'flour' don't you?

Ellen
Remember, you can Date Any Woman

It's All about How You Make Her Feel - Dating Tip #1

2004-12-09T23:09:00.000-05:00

I'm starting to realize that it's easier to give verbal advice than it is to write about it, but here goes . . .

Did you ever watch the TV Show 'Blind Date'? Most of the guys that are on that show couldn't get laid anywhere at anytime! It isn't that they aren't good looking or that they aren't nice guys. Many of them are both. Unfortunately for them (and the poor women that are on the date) they are clueless. They drone on about their jobs and friends and their money, often failing to notice that the woman could care less.

The first thing you have to know is that on a date you should be involved in a conversation and not a monologue. If you don't ask her about herself - if you aren't truly interested in getting to know her - then why should she want to know you?

Be involved in a conversation and be interested in her likes and dislikes and when she sees that you are truly interested in more than just your new car - maybe she'll start to have some of the right feelings. Remember, its all about the feelings!

Ellen
Remember, you can Date Any Woman

Welcome to Free Dating Advice

2004-12-08T11:21:00.000-05:00

Welcome to Free Dating Advice! Hi, I'm Ellen and you may be wondering what gives me the right to offer free dating advice. Over the past 12 years I have attended college where I worked part time as a bartender. Everyone knows that bartenders have people crying on their shoulders constantly and asking for advice. After some time I got to be good at it.

When I left college I signed on as a hostess with a major airline. At that time I didn't give out much advice, but I can honestly say that I've been hit on in more than 30 countries by men that spoke 15 different languages!

I know what women want. I can show you what to say and how to give a woman what she wants. Good luck, I hope you enjoy the free dating advice.

Ellen
You can Date Any Woman!