So my nephews made this video containing some helpful shortcuts for Mario Kart (Nintendo). I know this will help you out! May the force be with you…

AAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am sooooo f*#king pissed right now!!!!! I’m playing through Gears of War 2 (Epic Games) in Insane mode… AND IT”S DRIVING ME INSANE!!!!! I have just gotten up to Tip of the Spear “ROLLING THUNDER” the convoy level. The convoy gets interrupted by a barrage of Neymacyst Mortars. This level frustrated the shit out of me the first time I played through and it has done it once again!!!!

You have to shoot the flying mortars before they hit the armored vehicle your in. First you need to jump onto the Gatling gun on the upper left side of the vehicle. Now you don’t really need to do shit till after the Helicopter gets hit and a near miss causes a boulder to dislodge and smash your vehicle. Now the Gatling gun has some restrictions that frustrate the sh*t out of me. First of all, there is a delay before the gun will start shoot (maybe 2 seconds ) so you need to fire prior to your target coming in sight. Second, the gun will over heat if you fire for too long(hit RB a bunch of times to cool it down) so you need to time it just right. If you get hit by these mortars twice… your toast!
Now if that’s not too much of a pain in the ass once you get by this you have to take out a Reaver that will attack you on the left side of the vehicle… if you f*#k up and don’t destroy that bastard before it destroys the transport vehicle, it’s back to the f*#king beginning of the level!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Iiiiiii’m F*#KING PIIIIIISSSSSSSED!!!!!!

Abigail Williams can feel my pain!!!!!!

So I picked up Prince of Persia (Ubisoft Montreal) on December 6th and finished it on the 14th (of December…for the learning impaired). Not bad huh? Well I didn’t play it straight through (because I’m not that much of a loser… I do have to work sometimes) but I did put in some serious segments of time on this game. Actually, one day I put a solid 5 to 6 hours in (did I just waste a day of my life on a f*#king video game?… ahhhhg) and it was quite addicting.

The bottom line on this game is that it was pretty amazing. Fantastic graphics, excellent game play, impressive cinematics and cut scenes, interesting story and even a great score (I know this sounds retarded but it stuck with me like the Lord of the Rings score). Ubisoft Montreal…. YOU ROCK!

What I didn’t like about the game was the actual combat. You don’t really have as many moves when fighting (like in Assassins Creed), which limits your technique during battle (I’ll go through that another day). Once you figure out how to fight one boss, you could actually fight all the others the same way (there’s a pattern). Kind of a bummer…but this game isn’t really about the combat.

What I did like was the way you move around the terrain. You can climb on walls, run on walls, slide down walls, scale up ivy patches, swing and flip from these hanging bars and even climb upside down. It’s very fluid once you get all the moves down, and adds a 3d Sonic the Hedgehog (Nintendo) like quality (you will dig it). Plus there are these giant gem stones that you can climb onto and they will fling you to the next gemstone. Some catapult you, some whisk you away, some allow you to run on the walls (up and down, sideways and even upside down) and some actually make you fly (it’s very cool). Also you can’t die… yes that’s right, you can’t die. If you fall off a ledge or miss a jump or fall into a pit of evil black goo or even get maimed by a boss , the princess (that you travel with throughout the game) will save you before you die. I like this because it keeps you in the game instead of dying and having to reboot back into the level.

Definitely a much different game than Assassins Creed (Ubisoft’s previous offering… and one of my top favorites). Price of Persia is a thinkers game (wow I sounded like a f*#king dork)…. What do I mean by this. Well, there’s some puzzle like situations that you have to figure out (on certain levels). By pulling these levers you have to manipulate the terrain to allow you passage to the next segment (some of these puzzles would actually be easier for someone who is good at math). It definitely made this game more challenging that just the run of the mill slash and kill third person shooter… But! Once again, I would recommend to either rent this game, or buy it used. I really could have finished this game in about 20 hours give or take (not in one sitting… my brain would melt). I guess if you can’t wait for the rental or used copies to become available, and you have the cash to burn… treat yourself!…buy it new!

Here’s a review from Gametrailers.com

I know, I know… I’m a jerkoff cause I didn’t write this article on the release day. Screw you guys!… I was busy!!! OK… Now that I have that off my chest…
So I picked up Prince of Persia (Ubisoft) yesterday, and… What?… you’ve never heard of Prince of Persia? Where the f*#k have you been for the last 20 years? Check it out:

Prince of Persia (often shortened to “POP”) is a platform game, originally developed by Jordan Mechner in 1989 for the Apple II, that was widely seen[citation needed] as a great leap forward in the quality of animation seen in computer games. Mechner used a process called rotoscoping, in which he studied many hours of film of his younger brother David running and jumping in white clothes, to ensure that all the movements looked just right. Also unusual was the method of combat: protagonist and enemies fought with swords, not projectile weapons, as was the case in most contemporary game.

stolen from Wikipedia

So there ya go… now you have video geek cred!

OK… back to the review.

What can I say about this game? I am a huge fan of those crazy Video Geeks from the Qc… Ubisoft Montreal! Assassins Creed is a f*#king awesome game… Top Notch!!!
Needless to say, I was excited for the release of this game… and so far I am not disappointed.
To start, the graphics are amazing, just like in Assassins Creed. The Cinematics are really good, and the score is fantastic… adding a good level of suspense to the story. The training mode in the beginning is OK, but you may just have to practice sh*t to get used the controls.
I really forgot how much I loved Assassins Creed just for the way you can climb almost anything. On this game you can RUN ON WALLS!!! It’s f*#king awesome. So far the games combat is not as dramatic as Assassins Creed, but I still have a ways to go with this game (I think?).
What is more fun in this game are these challenging puzzles you have to solve. For one you have a lot of climbing and jumping around that you have to do to get around in this world… and some times it takes some thought on getting across certain parts. Second, you have these jumping stones that will launch you from one wall to another, and you will run into these places were the stones are covered by a disk with a hole in it. You have to figure out the combination to rotate these disks to expose the stones… It makes me feel pretty dumb (square peg…fit in round hole?).

Bottom line… I like it, BUT…before you go out and spend your money…let me play through it some more. I’ll report back…

Sorry guys… I’ve been bustin my ass working, so I didn’t have time to write. Contrary to popular belief, I don’t live in my parents basement (f*#k you very much).
So I finished Gears of War 2(Epic Games) a couple of weeks ago, and I’ll just give you my quick overview.

Great game!
Great story
Awesome new weapons
New creatures
New vehicles
New characters

Over all… I loved this game, BUT… once again like Star Wars the Force Unleashed (Lucas Arts) it was short… no as short, but short. Probably about 30 hours (give or take) of game play. Maybe I just loved it so much I played through quickly. I recommend if you have the cash… buy it used. If you don’t have the cash, rent it and enjoy. I really didn’t give the Xbox live mode a try, because I knew that some douche bag prepubescent 12 year old would blow my head off every 2 seconds (you know who you are).

Phew! Now I can start Prince of Persia (Ubisoft) and I’ll get back to you tomorrow.

Now enjoy my favorite band live…Ladies and Geeks… The Faceless!

Yep… Sure as sh*t! Booting up my new copy of Gears of War 2 (Epic Games) was like coming home again. Wow! That sounded f*#king weak! Lets try that again. F*#king Gears of F*#king War F*#king 2 is F*#king GREAT!!!!! There… was that better for all you Speedypete fans out there?

First of all, I’m glad I didn’t wait in line with all the other geeks, pencil neck, limp dicks and poindexters last night. I think I may have had enough of that. What?… do I think I’m too cool for it? Your dam right I do!
So I went to pick up the game at GameStop around 11am… No Line! What a pleasure. It’s like I had a special in… Just walked right in and grabbed my game, and went home to play.
From the time I booted this game up I got that feeling. You know what I mean… That fight or flight adrenaline filled feeling of excitement. The same feeling when I went to see “Star Wars The Empire Strikes Back” and “The Lord of the Rings” for the first time. I AM GEEK… HEAR ME ROAR!!!!
Bottom line so far is the game looks great. Great graphics, great cinematics, great sound… I just forgot how good this one is. I forgot how cool the artwork is on this game. Looks kind of like a dark graphic novel.
There was also the introduction of a couple of new adversary’s and some new weapons. Now ya see how easy it is to make your fans happy Epic ? So far I am very happy with this game. I’ll let you know how I did over the weekend. Seeeeeee yaaaaaaa!

Just got a voice message from Gamestop that they will be opening @ midnight tonight (tomorrow morning), and I can come pick up my copy of Gears of War 2 (Epic Games)! Wait… you remember the last time I did this, don’t you? well check it out.. cue the flash back

Well anyways, I’m excited and at the same time ready to be disappointed. After Halo 3 (Bungie), I’ve learned to not to believe the hype of the fanboys. Just get the game and don’t expect sh*t. I haven’t been researching all the articles teasing the game, and haven’t even checked out any of the trailers. I just saw my first TV commercial for GOW 2 while watching Metalocalypse… Yea Metalocalypse (Cartoon Network/ Adult Swim). You don’t watch it? Well you suck!!! Anyways I’ll be picking up my copy tomorrow and I’ll tell you what I think… SO STAY TUNED YA GEEKY LITTLE PUSS BALL!

Dethklok Rules!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So I have played through Star Wars the Force Unleashed (Lucas Arts) on a lower level and had no problem going through the Imperial Kayshyk Mission. But now that I am going through on a higher level, destroying the Tractor Beam at the end of this mission was a pain in the ass!… but I have the solution!
Let’s make it simple… huh?

1. Kill all Imperial Troops (and release imprisoned Wookies.. they’ll help you)
2. Pull all the electrodes out (they have electricity shooting out of them) and lift and toss them away with your force throw.
3. Grab the increased damage triangle (it’s the first one on the left from where you entered this part of the level)
4. Shoot the douche-bag in the AT-KT with your force lightning until he’s dead

the end

So I just read an article on technologyexpert about the recall of the Rage Wireless Guitar controller for the Nintendo Wii. I guess if you put the batteries in wrong, the f*#ker will leak battery acid (ouch! that’s metal!). Check it out:

Consumers are urged to stop using the Rage controllers immediately and return them to the place where purchased for a full refund. Remember, this is not a Nintendo product, just one that can be used with the Wii, so don’t bother contacting Nintendo.
You can contact PDP; strangely, the CPSC information for PDP says to call PDP at (800) 331-3844 between 7 a.m. and 9 p.m. CT Monday through Friday, or visit the firm’s Web site at www.pdp.com. If you go to PDP’s site, the only info you get is exactly the same as at the CPSC’s site (at least at the time of this writing), a copy of the CPSC’s announcement.
In other words: no new information there, move along, move along. If you want to contact PDP: only one way, via phone.

And guess where it was manufactured? Yep, China. Ooops.

Here’s the Consumer Product Safety Commission’s anouncement:
Hazard: A circuit board defect can cause AA batteries used in the guitar to leak if the batteries are installed incorrectly, posing a risk of chemical burns to consumers.

Incidents/Injuries: Performance Designed Products has received one report of a burn to a consumer.

I wonder when made in China will translate to use at your own risk!

Now enjoy some Morbid Angel

About Direct2Drive
Direct2Drive (D2D) is IGN Entertainment’s digital download store (http://www.direct2drive.com). Launched in October 2004, D2D allows consumers to conveniently purchase and download the latest premium PC games, comics and anime titles directly from the Web to their desktops. D2D’s AAA roster of leading game publishers includes Atari, Activision, Blizzard Entertainment, Electronic Arts, NCsoft, Rockstar Games, SEGA, Sony Online Entertainment, THQ, 2K Games, Ubisoft and Vivendi Universal Games.

I’m not a PC gamer, but this sounds pretty cool… saves you a trip to the store. I am looking forward to this being available on Xbox Live… INSTANT GRATIFICATION BABY!!!!!