If you want to be happy, be. ~ Leo Tolstoy

Easier said than done, isn’t it? Pursuit of happiness is one thing. But actually pinning it down seems impossible on some days.

If you have been using EFT for any amount of time, you know that it can pull you out of the trenches of melancholy pretty quickly.

It helps to know exactly why you might be feeling low. Often, it is not just one thing, but a result of a whole lot of stuff that has accumulated over a period of time. It can show up as sadness, restlessness, irritability, general anxiety, low energy or just a feeling that something is not right.

The ennui of daily routine and boring chores can make life seem meaningless and dull. Your heart longs for excitement, but if you have to throw yourself into your duties and responsibilities, it can create on a sense of deprivation.

If you have been taking on a heavy work load and not getting enough rest, it can cause dullness and brain fog. Any kind of stress that lingers in the background all the time can keep you in a state of perpetual longing for a better life. If nothing else, it is sometimes the Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) that can bring on the blues.

In these situations, the more we try to force happier thoughts, the more the mind rebels. Simply thinking your way out of the blues is an uphill task.

You need to break the cycle of repetitive thoughts that continue to make you feel miserable. EFT can do that efficiently, because as you calm down your overwhelm through some tapping, positive reframes often start to bubble up spontaneously.

It helps to do a few quick rounds of EFT to lift your spirits. Here are some EFT setup statements that can be used. Pick one or more that call out to you and say them out while tapping on your karate chop.

These statements need not be limited for use on the karate chop. You can use the same statements to tap on the rest of the points as well.

1. Even though I’m not feeling my best right now, and I see no way to snap out of it, I accept myself anyway. I’m open to learning how I can help myself feel better bit by bit.

2. Even though the recent goings on haven’t exactly given me a reason to celebrate, I wish I could see the goodness around me with wide open eyes and find something to celebrate anyway.

3. Even though these worries are always lingering in the back of my mind, they don’t let me be at peace, I’m now starting to question if constant worrying is helping me at all. I want to clear my mind so that I can think my way out of whatever is bothering me.

4. Even though this foreboding feeling just won’t leave me alone, and I’m tired of fighting it off, I’m also opening up to hearing more clearly which is the voice of my intuition and what are just stray thoughts.

5. Even though my mind feels so foggy right now that I can’t think my way out of a paper bag, let alone recite clever setup statements, I accept myself for feeling this way.

6. Even though uncertainty is looming large over my head, I accept my fears and this feeling of helplessness. I’m open to seeing clearly what I can do to claim my power that I have given away to this uncertain situation.

7. Even though I can’t wait for the day to be over so I can go home and relax, what if I could relax just a little right now? I acknowledge my overwhelm and this disappointment on being less than a super-human.

8. Even though I’d rather be outside, having fun and going places, I accept myself for feeling tied down by this situation. At the same time, I want to appreciate my purpose in being here and in doing what I am doing. This sense of purpose feels liberating.

9. Even though everything seems to be falling apart and it feels like I have no control over all that is going on around me, I want to remember that I do have control over how I respond to the chaos around me. I want to pull myself together and recognize the choices I have in the moment.

10. Even though I’m surrounded by people who don’t understand me, who try to impose stereotypes on me, I choose to acknowledge and embrace my uniqueness. Yes, I may not be everybody’s idea of an ideal person, but I love and accept myself for all that I am, good and bad.

11. Even though I’m afraid and worried how things will turn out, I accept my fears and acknowledge that it is reasonable to feel afraid in this situation. At the same time, I want to tap into my inner power that will help me survive this ordeal without falling apart.

12. Even though I’m so upset over what happened, and it is still lingering in my mind, I am ready to release this emotional baggage and free myself to write new chapters in my life story, preferably with a happy ending.

Sonal Pandey is a software engineer turned self-help blogger. On her blog Tap Easy, she offers Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) tapping scripts addressing anxiety, fear, stress and a host of day-to-day challenges.

image credit

She’s also a gifted writer and blogger, I always enjoy reading her artistic musings that spring forth from her BEingness with passion and love.  Her site is MoondraagonsReiki.com, I highly recommend you check it out.

Natalie, I love YOU, thank YOU for being such a large part of my life and growth, I am grateful for YOU!

Divine Love,
Nathan Martin

I would like to state that from a Oneness perspective, there is nothing broken and that nobody needs to be fixed.  We are all on the journey that we have chosen to be on and in the midst of the lessons that we desire to learn.  By fixing other people’s problems we are perpetuating our own codependent need for love and enabling their limiting beliefs.  This is not love, this is selfishness.

By removing this limiting belief, you will eradicate yet another coping mechanism that you may have utilized to secure what you thought was love—which in turn will force you to deal with your root childhood traumas.  It may also free you up from the burden of needing to rescue your loved ones and humanity, while also clearing your need to be rescued from your circumstances.  Lastly, you may break the association that you have which believes that masculinity is demonstrated through fixing things for people; for it is NOT a masculine trait but a stereotype that has harmed both men and women.

I would like to add that there is nothing wrong with assisting others out of a sense of compassion and divine guidance.  However, this is done out of a purely loving perspective without the need to make them better.  Sometimes compassion can say no and let people suffer through their lessons until they learn them.  We help others the most when we are an empowering presence in their life and a trusted advisor, not a helicopter smother lover who hovers in to make it all better.

Let’s tap away the limiting belief that “fixing things” is love in the video below:





I enjoy your comments and feedback, please let me know your feelings and experiences in the comments section below. Lastly, if you enjoy reading my blog and tapping along with my videos, please sign up for updates and tapping tips on the form at the top right of your screen, as well as “liking” my Facebook Fan Page.

Bringing the Light radio show with Wendy Joy!

• This week, Nathan Martin discussed an amazing healing technique called EFT, or the Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT).
• EFT, developed by Gary Craig, is a form of energy psychology based on the energy meridian points of the body. It has similarities to acupuncture and acupressure.
• Nathan discusses how EFT can be used to clear emotional traumas like PTSD and conducts an EFT session to clear guilt.
• Nathan tells how his use of EFT led to a spiritual opening for him as well as a kundalini rising experience.
• Nathan explains his new webinar series focuses on improving your SEX life.

I have noticed that a lot of people who are busy, are actually that way to avoid connecting with those they love.  This behavior is a defense mechanism to keep them safe from the perceived dangers of connecting and being intimate.  To connect is to be vulnerable, and so they find all manner of busy work to keep them safe.  Let’s move from “they” to “we” now; YES, we create our lives exactly the way we want them to be.  If we’re married to our job, it’s because we created it that way, if we are too busy with errands, it’s because we created it that way, if we’re too busy with anything, we created our life that way!

We do not need to create life in this manner, and yet we do so to avoid vulnerability, to avoid emotional responsibility, to avoid the pain of realizing that we are failing at being a parent or lover…so we create busyness as our excuse, that way it’s “works fault”, or whatever task has come up, and not “our fault”.  We can change this, but I am warning you, if you tap with the video below, your fears will begin to surface, because one of your primary means of avoidance will have been cut off.  Can you handle the responsibility of experiencing your emotions without this defense mechanism?  It will be worth it, I promise, but do so knowing that you will be confronted by that which you may have been hiding from your whole life.

Good luck!
 

 
I enjoy your comments and feedback, please let me know your feelings and experiences in the comments section below. Lastly, if you enjoy reading my blog and tapping along with my videos, please sign up for updates and tapping tips on the form at the top right of your screen, as well as “liking” my Facebook Fan Page.

If our relationship does not live up to our expectations of forever, we feel guilty, powerless, and ashamed.  Instead of owning our feelings and learning from them, we project our feelings of powerlessness on our lover and make them the bad guy.  If things don’t seem to be working and we subconsciously want out of the relationship, we may start pushing our partner’s buttons to get them to wrong us, creating them as the jerk while we become their victim.

Pushing our partner’s buttons to justify a breakup, while becoming their victim is not unconditional love for them or ourselves.  So why would we play such games?

In our society, we do not fall in love with people, we fall in love with our childhood expectations being met. However, the path towards unconditional love is paved with letting go of our attachments to our childhood and societal beliefs, thus opening us up to loving real people.

When we fixate on only one idea as right, and label all others as wrong, we miss out on the beauty of the unlimited number of possibilities that exist. When we drop our expectations of what is right and wrong, we get to the place where anything is possible, and that is when the real fairy tale can happen. The fairy tale is not “far, far away” in the future, where everything ends ”happily ever after”, the fairy tale is here in this moment, in the very place that we have been looking past.

Is “happily ever after” possible?  Of course it is, however, I do not feel that it is an ideal way in which to judge the success of a relationship.  What if instead we could learn to judge relationships by how much we learn, grow, and expand?  What if the true success of a relationship can be found in how much karma we burn off together?  Or by how much we lovingly accomplish in the world?  If this is the case, I’ve had romantic relationships that only lasted two months that were easily as successful as the one that lasted eight years.  (For more on the “how to” of burning off karma in a relationship, see the article “Relationships as a Mirror and EFT”.)

The more karma that we burn off in our current relationships, the more we set ourselves up for longer lasting connections in which we experience a depth and width that we never before could have dreamed possible.  Allowing for the possibility that a relationship is not always meant to last forever, allows us the freedom to walk away when the timing is right.  This also gives us the freedom to end our relationships on loving terms, without the need to create each other as the bad guy; this is tremendously empowering, as we are no longer each other’s victims.  Blame disappears and is replaced by an abundance of overflowing gratitude for our shared experiences.

Can society really fathom a life in which relationships regularly end with gratitude and love?  Can you?  Let’s tap out the limiting belief in the video below, and we will go to this new place together.

I enjoy your comments and feedback, please let me know your feelings and experiences in the comments section below. Lastly, if you enjoy reading my blog and tapping along with my videos, please sign up for updates and tapping tips on the form at the top right of your screen, as well as “liking” my Facebook Fan Page.

I WEAR AN “INVISIBLE CROWN” ……Alwayssssss !!… …..I rejoice for being “Existant and Non Existant …..Living and Loving ” in my Cosmic beloved !!!…… Qualitatively “I AM GOD ” Quanatively “I AM GEETANJALI ” Everyday I strive to break freeeee from this cage of ego to become absolute Nothingness …..Stillness …..Consciousness ….that is where I come from ..that is where I go …….So why have I “stuck” in between please please let me go…..to myself ..to my source ….to the eternity ..the formidable force that is in me and I am in it ….All I know is I have been plucked and thrown.. before I lived and before I was grown ..!!!.. …take me back ..let me bloom, leaving behind the earthly gloom…One with myself let me live in bliss …as a stranger here my life is amiss !! …..I know I am the creation ..I know I am God …I know I am love …I know I am you ..then why is that no one has any clue .. we all are a part of a greater plan ….. why a mad rush to exel when we all are part of one big clan ……??? Will man ever.. ever stop the quest for achieving , and open his heart to endless recieving …..of the love that spins the earth around …the love that makes us stay on the ground …the love that brings every face a smile …..a love that makes thousand of lifetimes worthwhile ….

Are you afraid of being alone? Do you stay in bad relationships way past their expiration date? This can be caused for numerous reasons, however, sometimes it’s good to tap on the top level issue to let the deeper ones come up to the surface. A lot of times, we watched our parents stay too long in a bad relationship, because they were afraid of being alone. That’s not love, it’s fear! Maybe our parents stayed together for us, “for the kids” as they say. Maybe we were neglected as a child, always alone, and so now we’re afraid of being neglected and alone as adults. Let’s tap away the top level fear and see where it leads us.
 

 
I enjoy your comments and feedback, please let me know your feelings and experiences in the comments section below. Lastly, if you enjoy reading my blog and tapping along with my videos, please sign up for updates and tapping tips on the form at the top right of your screen, as well as “liking” my Facebook Fan Page.
 

I have been struggling with the concept of being a conscious creator while still surrendering to the flow of life.  How do I find the balance between having what I desire and letting go of controlling the process?  I can honestly say that this hasn’t been an easy task to find balance in, but I feel that it is a subject that I have finally integrated into my being.

I was having a discussion this past week with my amazing new friend Renee, when she said something that caught me off guard. She stated that it was a turn on for women to feel claimed by a man. At first glance, this felt like a limiting belief and the need to feel possessed in order to feel loved, something I have covered in an earlier blog post called “Tapping Away Possessiveness”. However, after opening myself up to truly understanding her perspective, it is more about a desire to be involved with a confident man who knows what he wants in life rather than a desire to be owned.

In “Parenting with Love and Logic” by Fay and Cline, they describe a child who needs to know their parents love them by setting firm limits. Children push their parents to see if they are going to be consistent, because if they are, the child will feel safe and stable, but if not, they will actually feel insecure and anxious growing up. The authors liken this to a child leaning against a wall to see if it will hold up and not crumble; if they push against the wall and it crumbles, the child realizes that very little in life is stable and secure. At the same time, a wall is not going to push against the child either, it is not going to fall on top of them or hurt them, it just stands firm. Just as our children yearn for stability, we desire the same as adults.

To Renee, a man who knows that he desires her, and then follows through with his conviction with confidence is sexy, because she feels his stability, that she’s going to be able to lean against the wall and it’s going to stand firm, even during turbulent times.

With some additional help from my friend Natalie of Moondraagon’s Reiki, I was able to discover the patterns in my own life, in which I have used the concept of “being in the flow” as an excuse to avoid feeling hurt when I did not get what I wanted, it’s a way of protecting myself and was not flowing with life. I have been a flexible, happy go lucky man from a state of survival and fear and NOT a space of BEingness and surrender. I have been using awakening as an excuse to avoid my feelings of powerlessness and let down, instead of owning my feelings and creating a new pattern that will serve me better in this moment.

I have done this by setting disclaimers for my intentions and desires, saying something to the effect, “but if not, I understand because I want to be open to the flow”. In all actuality, this tiny addition to my request demonstrates my disbelief in the desire actually coming to fruition. So where does this stem from in childhood? As a child, we can get comfortable hearing our parents tell us “yes” or “no”, but then their actions do not match their words with follow through.  We become very content feeling let down, even if it’s in getting our way when they originally say no. We are trained as children to be in a perpetual state of instability instead of a space of BEingness and stability. This feeling of instability looks to the Universe and to others as if we’re in a state of confusion.

Additionally, we may have had a “pushy” parent who got what they wanted by trampling other people’s boundaries, or a wishy washy parent who was too afraid and insecure to meet their own needs or stand up for ours. This would cause us to operate on either extreme in our dealings with others and the Universe, also preventing the manifestation of our desires. This could cause us to seem either presumptuous, speaking for others instead of allowing them to live their own lives, or passive, rarely meeting our own needs.

Let’s tap away the root causes for this instability and claim what is ours, receive what we have asked for, and learn how to be able to both flow and create together!
 

 

 
I enjoy your comments and feedback, please let me know your feelings and experiences in the comments section below. Lastly, if you enjoy reading my blog and tapping along with my videos, please sign up for updates and tapping tips on the form at the top right of your screen, as well as “liking” my Facebook Fan Page.
 

In my article “A Blueprint for World Peace”, I explain how our past childhood experiences form our current worldview:

“Let’s discuss childhood development and how it teaches us to live as either a victim or a victor. Before the age of four, we are in a virtual state of hypnosis emotionally, unable to filter out anybehavior, experience, expectation, or pattern that we learn from our parents. At the age of four, ourfilter, the frontal lobes in our brain, gradually turns on. By the age of seven our frontal lobes arefully developed, this is when we stop learning emotionally and start learning from a more criticalperspective. At this point in our development, our coping patterns that we needed to survive andreceive what we perceived as love are now firmly engrained, like the operating system of an elaborate computer.

This operating system that is running in our animal brain after the age of seven is what is known asour ego, our mind. This is our identity, how we perceive ourselves, as well as our expectations of how others “should” act; and we filter everything we experience in life through this stored program,this personality. But is this really us, or is it actually what our parents and experiences created us tobe? No, it’s not us, it is only a filter based on the expectations from our family and culture of originthrough which the real us perceives life.”

In this video, I show you the technique that I use to discover root childhood memories associated with our current feelings and situations that are reflected around us.  Once the memory is discovered, the pattern can be more clearly seen, and the situation can be safely healed and integrated (using EFT) as an ordinary memory, as it no longer holds a negative emotional charge.
 

 
I enjoy your comments and feedback, please let me know your feelings and experiences in the comments section below. Lastly, if you enjoy reading my blog and tapping along with my videos, please sign up for updates and tapping tips on the form at the top right of your screen, as well as “liking” my Facebook Fan Page.