Fresh Fixins--Transformed by GRACE

Rough Riding.

2013-05-16T21:28:00.003-07:00

Just once it would amaze me if my life went smoothly. It never does. If you keep up with my FB blab then you know that since I discovered that cowboy boots keep my feet and tendons in one piece, I have been actively looking for work. I found an advertisement for an LPN instructor on the Internet with Antonelli College right here in Jackson. I was really excited about it. I had the requirements for the job and I really LOVE to TEACH.

After a very POSITIVE, as in one of the most Affirming interviews I ever had, I did a mock teach and was offered the job.

RED FLAG #1 they didn't offer me the job they advertised for. They said the LPN program wasn't ready yet would I teach anatomy and physiology until it is ready. I would be offered a full time faculty job when that happened. To tell you the truth I was a bit stunned. No one said anything about anatomy until they said they wanted to hire me. BECAUSE I really want to teach nursing I thought it would be OK. I did alright in my science classes. I didn't get A's but a B in those courses is good. They also told me that the level I would be teaching was not nearly as difficult it would be for medical assistants, and massage therapy students. They also promised a lot of help and support.

RED FLAG #2 YOu start on Monday. Where is my book? We don't have one. Where is my teacher guide? Zip nada. Where is the answer key? Zip.....OMG what a set up for failure.
NEXT!!!

RED FLAG #3 remember 3 strikes your out?

Their corporate head quarters has decided to make Anatomy 2 into 2 courses. Their are only 7 chapters for that section. In a 2 or 4 year college Anatomy is covered in one semester. This school is dragging it out into 3 terms of 8 weeks. For the Anatomy 3 class we are to spend 3 hours twice a week on 20 pages of material. There is no lab. There is a lab book for Physiology with a DVD but it has not been connected by IT. They change their passwords almost daily so no one can use anything on their personal computer. There is no way to actually teach this portion of the class but it is on the syllabus and the students want to know why they had to pay for this! OF COurSE they do!!!!! DUH!!!!! Next RED flag #4..... corporate those people whose job it is to screw up the working peoples jobs have changed the book. They have changed the picture of the book on the syllabus but not the actual syllabus. The syllabus which dictates everything done in the class does not match the book in any way shape or form. The DVD with the power point also does not match. I went through the syllabus and the book and wrote in the right chapter numbers and pages and made some suggestions for additional chapters to cover.....BECAUSE WE WERE TO DO 3 CHAPTERS IN 8 WEEKS.
I KNOW I just said that. Do you like to hear things repeated? How about if you are paying good money to go to school and show up to class for the second session and HEAR the same lecture again?
TOTAL MUTINY! Some of the kids packed up and left. Some asked why I was treating them like retards. They LOOKED at the syllabus and saw that next week was the same chapter another 2 times and went and had a hissy fit to the president of this college. Who is a rattle snake in disguise. OK This is where we take a breath.....
Today was the first day that went well. I actually learned how to use the grade keeper, the test generator, and enter attendance in the computer. My Anatomy 1 students really liked me. That they gave me TWO different areas of Anatomy to teach with no notice or preparation or MATERIALS was not lost on me. AFTER the mutiny I lost it. I mean I really lost it. I let my assessment of this disaster be known on no uncertain terms. AS in, "this is a total set up for failure and I have lost all credibility with these students because of this total lack of organization!!!" If you know me in real life you know I am a passionate person. I have a strong sense of justice. I can be incredibly vocal about injustice. To me it is obvious that these students are being exploited to make the college money. They are producing a lousy product. This entire fiasco was not my fault. I was doing good to come back. After the first day with no book and getting thrown under the bus I wanted to run.
I WENT BACK because I really want to teach nursing. I want to inspire nurses to care to do the right thing not the easy thing. To be their patients advocate and solve problems not just let it slide and do nothing. To lift the covers and really check their patients out and not just use their stethoscope in 3 spots feel a pulse and call it DONE. I want to teach nurses to SEE.
The good part to the story is..... I made a friend. The dean just loved me. He has been a principal of elementary school children. He loved how I told him about teaching my granddaughter to write in a cookie sheet of pudding, because she was so hyper she wouldn't hold a pencil. He loved how I think out of the box and problem solve. He wants to stay in touch. I have never been let down nicer. I think it really broke his heart that she wanted to terminate me in my first week after not even giving me a fair chance to succeed. She had the audacity to ask me to come back for the LPN program, which I said I was absolutely NOT interested in. RU FREAKIN insane? SERIOUSLY???????
So here I am a little bruised for the wear but not defeated. The dean was so kind. He told me, "YOU HAVE GOT THIS YoU ARE A NATURAL BORN TEACHER DON'T QUIT!"

Which made me thank God and tear up because I hung in there when I didn't want too and just when I thought I could do it she cut me. Even when someone is nice it hurts. I was willing to hang in there. I was willing to work on my own time to prepare for two classes without any notice, to get to where I wanted to go.
It's their loss. I'm embarrassed for posting it to the whole world, I never dreamed it would be like this.
This is real life though isn't it? I went in to work this morning thinking this verse, "Faith is the evidence of things hoped for but not yet seen." My Jesus loves me and HE has something better. Some time in the near future something will happen and this will all click. We will look back and see why I had this little trial by fire, AND God will turn it into something good.

Mama Please Let Your Babies Grow Up to Be Cowboys

2013-04-26T19:53:00.001-07:00

Last month we went to Texas for two weeks up in the hill country to visit my brother.

I probably have enough blog material from that trip for 6 posts if I'd get busy and write them. We saw a rattlesnake show, really, and cowboys---the gen-u-ine deal.....

Sorry ladies he is taken. I happen to be old enough to tell him that he was gorgeous and I wanted to take his picture so that women in other parts of the country could look at him and weep.
Of course he thought I was nuts, in true cowboy fashion he just tipped his hat and smiled.

and rode.

I caught this picture when the mares and foals were being rounded up. We were invited to Wagon Wheel Gist ranch to watch the yearly round up of mare with foals, mares ready to breed, and the sorting of everybody. Later this mare would get separated from her foal and me..the city girl would figure it out!!! HA! I don't care what species you are, all mama's freak the same way when they lose their kids in public. This little foal was born in the morning and running in the round up in the afternoon. AMAZING.

Reunited after a brief separation. Once the cowboys realized what was going on they stopped and found her baby and put them back together. We were told that other mares will kidnap newborns and it's important to get them back to their mama's. Right? The kidnappers have no milk and the little fellas die. BOO

This pair just slayed me. I also was getting some of the best pictures of my life, some are grainy but oh well, shooting fast is HARD! Everybody is running!

A kiss between mama and baby so sweet. These guys are not posing they were MOVING
as in OMG what a lucky shot!!!

Another stunning pair, black magnificance.

and another isn't she beautiful? Look at her mane and her sweet expression these are some seriously awesome horses and I don't know nuthin bout birthin horses Ms Scarlett!

so adorable I so wanted to touch, but these babies are not tame and their mama's aren't either.

At times I just didn't know what to look at or what to take pictures of, seriously what would you do?

My baby with Rusty Rodgers the ranch foreman and an awesome guy, we just loved him and his wife Juanita she is a HOOT!

That cowboy is a Marlboro man if ever I saw one. Hope he doesn't smoke, he does sizzle.

They just grow them right in Texas, go ahead ladies get out yer hankies and cry...

Nice horse, ya think?

How about those clouds? Thinking maybe about the long day ahead, or maybe. by now he jes might be posin....bwahaha.

This guy is one of the STALLIONS, the mares for him will be herded into a large area fenced off just for him and he knew it! He was huge. They had three seperate pens for different stallions and different mares. After looking at the mares and foals for a few hours he looked enormous and powerful.

Whew baby he was seriously excited and pacing, ready to make some foals the old fashioned way.
The cowboys call it horsey po#n

Look at the little ones running in the pack you can see how small the tiny one is. Seeing this in real life is so different, it was intoxicating really, too much beauty for one day.
But the day wasn't over because we left this ranch to go back to another one. My brother and my SIL live on a ranch and also have horses, three to be exact.

This is the brand on my brothers horse, can you guess which state it is?

Back at their ranch getting nibbled by Julie's ranch horse, number one in the pack of three.He did not want to be ignored.

It was my brother's horse Red Cloud that took a shine to me and it was thrilling. I never had a horse kiss me before.

He was nuzzling,

and kissing and those big old horsey lips really tickle,

awh schucks Red yer a FLIRT

which only encouraged him!

We had the time of our lives, two weeks out in God's country and I have more stories to tell so....I'll be back!

ART for Africa day

2013-03-06T18:34:00.000-08:00

My friend Elysa who lives down at We Will Go invited me to come down to her house and paint some pictures. She is auctioning them off to help her son raise funds to go this summer to Swaziland!!It will be his first mission trip. They live as missionaries in downtown Jackson.
I haven't made any art myself in years. It sounded like so much fun though!

Elysa is painting a background on a board to dry for later. Carolyn is one of the neighbors and I love her. She has made some really cool paintings!!

This is my picture. What do you think? I had Jimmy cut me a piece of wood and then he made a frame for me. I inked in a lot of the wood grain lines and then used them to make the water. The thought behind it is, "We will be like a tree planted by the waters, our leaf will not wither and whatsoever we do will prosper."

Carolyn painted this the other day. I love her sense of color and design. It's a powerful piece.

This piece is available for auction now. A man named Chris with a life changing testimony and a South African missionary worked on this one. Personally I love this. I placed a bid and have already been out bid. I may place another bid on it. http://elysasmusingsfromgraceland.blogspot.com/2013/03/overwhelmed-by-love.html

A painting by one of Elysa's kids also up for auction at some point. All these pieces will be available through her blog. Musings from Graceland.

I painted this big cross. You can't really see it though.

Laura and Carolyn discussing something we are having fun!

Elysa's masterpieces, personally I love the little African hut.

Carolyn and I and the piece she made today.

Don't make us look fat! There that's better....maybe....

Well OK, any way I am fat but I'm happy too so that's OK for now.

I feel like I'm in kindergarten and having a bunch of fun.

Just because I haven't posted in awhile I'll show you my rehab plan. I am USING it!
It's helping me a lot too.

Signing off with a bit of sugar, the man and the dogie.

So tell me do I have any potential as an artist? I've already quit my day job so you can be frank. HA!
If you want to bid on anything got to Elysa's blog and let her know!!
See you soon.

Crossroads Hypothetically Speaking

2013-02-04T11:17:00.001-08:00

I have piles of old shirts and fabrics. What I need is some enthusiasm about living life and get some creative juices from out of my head and into action. I was looking on line today at recycling old shirts and clothes and redyeing them into something special.

It's an interesting idea, redyeing something. I'd like to try it. Instead of looking for pretty fabrics I could look for anything in the fiber wanted and then make it into something pretty.

I'm still thinking about what to do to earn some money. Thinking doesn't accomplish much, doing does. But what to do? That is the question.

I think sometimes when there are too many options and too many distractions that it becomes hard to focus on one path and just start walking it. Cross roads are like that. There are a lot of paths facing me. Would I like to go back to school and be a nurse practitioner? Yes, but the funds is an issue and so is the work. There are a huge questions around that whole issue.

What about writing? Well I do my writing for free. My spelling, typing, grammar, punctuation is atrocious. People have said I should write a book but I don't have an idea for a book. There are a lot of questions about that too, like marketing.

The path of an artist. I have always been attracted to this. I am artistic but can I do something people will want to buy? What about the economy? Is anyone out there not on rice and beans like we are?
Truthful questions. I see the Etsy shops, but do items sell? What sells? That is the question all of America is asking right now, not just me.

Today I am thinking about the recycled aprons. How appealing are they? Hypothetically would you buy one if you saw it on Etsy? What would you pay for one? I made so many at Christmas and didn't take pictures which is a bummer, but you get the idea. So I ask you what does the survey say?

Stretching.

2013-01-19T20:45:00.000-08:00

Where is hope? Life has been so full of other families, other people, arms reaching out for some help, comfort and understanding. I'll never get used to watching old couples part as the first one to die leaves. I realize as I watch his small face with drooping eyelids blurry with tears and sorrow, how he almost stumbles to her empty shell to say farewell; that this is my biggest fear.

We aren't supposed to have fear if we have faith, but I do. I used to be independent, once upon a time long ago. There was a time that I hung onto it fiercely with defiance, it's my way or the highway.
Not anymore, now it's our way. Our marriage is a three fold cord not easily broken. We are us wrapped up with God and Jesus is always here. The Holy Spirit teaches, leads, fills, and comforts, so why do I hang onto this fear? Fear of the unravelling cord, of being the one left, the unkown of how to go back when you can never go back and the future imagined is a lake of tears.

For years I have asked that we die together because I don't want that lesson in pain.

Watching my friend, as his heart breaks, my heart hurts for him. I hear that quiet voice in myself, "Do you trust me?" Yes Lord, I do. and that is all.

I don't know what the future holds. I only know that I want to keep on this path of letting go. You see I am insatiable. There is never enough stuff. There is never enough pretty clothes, shoes, furniture, trinkets, nice cars, better houses, never never enough. As soon as one pretty bauble is slightly old it loses it's luster and is discarded for another just out of reach and it is sheer misery.

Learning to walk by faith however is the opposite, it is scary, exciting and always amazing when what I hoped for and thought about comes my way. I know it isn't happen chance it is provision. When I have resisted spending money on a new bed quilt and it is given to me. Even prettier than imagined and the sheets I actually needed were a Christmas gift this year and so unexpected. When the dog I love and struggled so much with and for, to keep and train and could not do it enough or right; finds a perfect home, and I was not looking. When God brings the family to your door and they are perfect and kind and this serious dog cannot stop wagging his tail at them and my heart breaks watching him fall in love with someone else, at the same time being thankful that it is just this way.

Learning with the Daniel fast that food addictions can be broken and bodies can feel better.

Seeing that needs are met if patience can hold out long enough to allow God to do what He will do. When I let him drive the car of my life and quit saying turn left here and just go for the ride. Stretching, growing and the fear of being left behind and not knowing what to do is less than it was, realizing it is a journey and grace is given when we need it. Believing that eternal arms are really there to lean on.

Because as I am turning lose of my life as I have fashioned it, with the things I have clung to, I realize this makes me mobile and available. Who knows I may end up with a back pack in another country at some point in the future; but the point is it doesn't matter where or when. I am already on the journey.

As I have pondered Jesus life, something very obvious has become clear to me. I admit I can be slow but it sometimes the simplest things right under our noses that are the easiest to miss. Jesus didn't minister from a high and lofty place. He came down here and dwelt among us. He didn't even have a house. He just had the clothes on his back and he went among the people who needed him, and who were those? People most of us don't want to hang with, dirty, messy screwed up sick people. Jesus lived like a street person a bum, and he ministered to the unlovely and the messy. HE came for people like me.
We really can't make a difference from far away we have to be with. We have to live with and walk with, be there. If we really want to be like Him and live like Him then we have to be willing to be led into anything.

I need Him and I want Him. I want more of Him. More trust less fear, more faith less doubt, more life less waste, more peace, more hope, more kindness, more goodness, more self control, more generosity, more meaning, more touching, more giving, more of the only life that satisfies me, sharing who set me free.

You see I am still insatiable but what I want now brings life giving hope not frustration. Freely pouring out my life and talents for mercies sake has a joy no paycheck can give. Being able to spend as much time as I need to without parameters, that is freedom.

Doing all as unto Jesus, pure joy.

Reflecting in the Deep.

2013-01-08T21:47:00.002-08:00

Does your head ever swim with questions? Mine does. I have been noticing the passage of time with other bloggers that I have been reading for a long time now, five, six years. Babies are children, little children are bigger children, and soon those bigger children will be off living their lives and a whole new set of blogging stories will follow.
Noticing that caused me to reflect on the beginning of my blog. I had just come back from my first mission trip to Colombia, it was one of those life changing, "aha" experiences. I came back knowing without a doubt how rich we are here. We have so much, such an excess of material goods. We have clothes that get thrown away with tags on them. Clothes that get tossed because they aren't in fashion anymore, or in my case because I have outgrown them. Outgrowing clothes at my age is also excess, a sign of abundance. We have so much food so many choices. How many kinds of cereal can they make? I saw so many children in one item of clothing or a pair of underwear. When you see in real life people who have little or nothing this waste we participate in is ugly, it indicts the conscience.

When is the last time you had to make a purchase of something important like a washer or dryer, a computer , or a TV, how complicated is THAT? When my washer died it was so overwhelming I bought another one just like mine, second hand. Don't get me wrong I had been waiting a long time to get a new fancy machine. Washing machines are like the cereal isle on steroids. I just tilted. No comprende. I'm thankful that I didn't purchase a fancy machine, the $100 second hand Maytag has been working fine now for years. The goal is clean clothes, right?

As I look back I can see that God started something in Colombia that didn't end when I came home. Two other mission trips later, God closed the door on short term trips and I sat down to wonder. When I stopped being able to work at the hospital I was totally confused. Wasn't I living a good godly life? Slowly God has been revealing to me that my life itself is a mission trip.

"We are supernatural beings living in a natural world". Someone smarter than me said that. I can't remember who but I remember what was said. We are on a journey, an adventure and so much like little hobbits we choose to love our comforts and homes; or step out the door and go on an adventure. There really are adventures everywhere around us. What I'm finding is my adventures are not glamorous or exciting but they are important. When I wake up and give the Lord my day he brings people into my life that need something that I can give. Lately God has been using every skill I possess. I was so busy for awhile that I asked for some rest and received it. BUT even as I rested a part of me did not want the rest; the part that knew I was missing something wonderful.

Today I chose not to rest. It was really cold out and that actually was a deterrent, did I want to go out and get chilly? Then the small inner voice won, "GO." Sometimes it is just that simple. Like the Nike shoe ad, "just do it."

I went down to the inner city of Jackson, our ghetto. I went to be a part of Hands &Feet, the clothing ministry and after that the Bible study. I went to meet with whoever God wanted me to meet. I went to smile and share love. I went to hug and to touch. I went to give.

I was paired with a young mother who just lost her little infant son to SIDS.
When I learned it was her, my breath snatched and my heart grabbed hard in my chest with the hurt of it. As we shopped together I gently asked her about her life. She told me about her little girl and we picked some cute things for her. I asked her about herself and she said she was just trying to hang on. That's when I told her that I knew of her little one. I asked her about her feelings and thoughts.
I told her about our baby. My first little grandson that was 4 months old and died at Christmas. My precious little boy that was shared with me every day of his sweet life. I had given him his first bath. I held him and loved him every single day of his life except for his last. I know about second guessing and driving yourself crazy with "what ifs." We talked and really shared. I know she knew I really cared about her. That I knew first hand what aching arms are, how you wake up and your first thoughts are confused like a bad dream that this can't be real, but it is. Then your eyes that are red and swollen and sore from crying squeeze out fresh tears and they sting, but you cannot help it, that river of tears seems like it will never dry up.
I share that my Joshua would be 24 and that when I cried for her Leroy, it was crying for Joshua and somehow I have kept on, but there will always be tears for him. He was the firstborn, born in our home, cradled in our arms, and fully loved with all our hearts. Other babies did not replace him. Other babies brought their own joys, but their is no replacement for a unique created being.

I like to imagine that my mother cares for Joshua in heaven. My mom was such a great baby lady. After being angry with God and feeling like he had given me too much, it finally came down to that simple idea. Please God let my mama hold my baby. Once I imagined him in her arms comforting as they are and all the kisses and cooing he would have and his little smiles back at her, it began to heal my heart. We all have our own way of dealing with grief. I needed a picture to replace the last picture. I could not let holding that little lifeless body be my last thoughts. Losing a baby is an opportunity to go insane. That door opens and with just a little nudge one can step inside and just let go. It takes effort to resist, reality is a painful intolerable place full of questions and sorrow. I don't wish it on anyone. If you can judge me and say that Jesus should have been enough then I forgive you, you have not lost a baby. We cannot say what is enough for someone. Our grief is our own, it is unique and shared and a journey we must travel through. There is no safe escape. Ultimately God is enough but at the time it is a struggle.

What good can come of something like this? Why does God let this happen?
Well, God is God and he knows more than I can even begin to wonder at. I'm not being trite, I can't explain it. I can only share my own story and say that I had to have simple answers. I really didn't care about the answers to the human condition. I wanted to remain sane and I needed something simple to hold onto, something real. I found those answers in Jesus.

What I do know is that God never wastes our suffering. If we allow it he will use it to comfort others. If we allow it he will use it to deepen our faith and show us more about who we are and who he is. Because I have walked in that valley I will walk with this young mother as far as she wishes. I will walk as shallowly or as deeply as she needs. If my wounds need to reopen to bleed with hers I will do it, because I know, they are already bleeding.

Every day isn't like this, digging deeply into life's hurts, but each encounter has given me a keen awareness of the Lords hand upon my life. By simply being available he has been directing me all over this town. He places someone on my mind and I call them= they have a need I can fill. Or a friend will know someone who they want me to talk too, and on it goes. Life can be so full on mission. We are all on mission, we just don't live that way. We are all created with a plan for our lives, a custom plan by God himself with a purpose, a future and HOPE. It's so awesome and from day to day more gets taken and more gets added and nothing feels the same. As I look back and reflect and question, I wonder what has taken me so long? How much longer is it going to take?

What I do know is God is faithful and good and HE is not finished with me yet.

It's a New Year

2013-01-06T13:26:00.000-08:00

Wow what happened to uploading pictures from your computer? No more? This may end my blogging career dismal as it is.( THANKS Elizabeth it is internet Explorer! Weird!)

I spent Friday in the ER with chest pain, not just chest pain but left arm, tight jaw, grabbing pinching chest pain. I thought I had a widow maker going on. It had to be bad to get me to go to the ER. I really hate going to the ER. We waited 3 and 1/2 hours after my normal EKG to be seen. That is a long time to sit and wait when your chest is being crushed with major pain. I was surrounded by horrible coughing and could only imagine the room full of GERMS that I was sitting in.
I was expecting to be discharged since they couldn't find anything wrong with me. Instead I spent the night in the chest pain observation unit. Even with morphine, Valium, and nitro, I really didn't get any relief or sleep until 6:30 in the morning and then it was time to get up and go do the heart stress test!
Now you will have to imagine this part.
Because of my Achilles tendon finally getting healed I asked if I could do the test in my cowgirl boots. Those are the best shoes I have ever worn. They fit my feet so perfectly and give a lot of support...so....

I did the test dressed in two big green patient gowns, one covered the front and one covered the back; and my very hip boots! That was a first for everybody. My feet did not hurt and I did the test well. Felt like I was going to faint from all the morphine and no sleep, but I do believe I can start walking again and that is a very wonderful idea!

I still have chest pain. My plan is to do the Daniel fast for the next 3 weeks maybe longer. Get some weight off, get my bad cholesterol numbers down, and keep on truckin. That's the way I roll, just keep on going.

This is going to be a year of change. The first change is the fast that I just mentioned. The next change and a big one is that Roman is going to a new home. it breaks my heart but I need to think about him too. He is a very big dog not to ever be walked or exercised. He is also an expensive big dog. i haven't been able to keep up with expenses like heart worm meds. A woman that comes to my Bible study has a beautiful home on a lake with 4 great kids and the littlest 6 year old girl is madly in love with Roman, they want him. The oldest son wants a dog to run with. They all exercise and he will be in the house with everybody and LOVED. He will be fine. It will take me awhile to get over this. They are building a fenced in area for the yard and this has been a slow process. We will go over a couple more times so he is really comfortable over there. He loves all of them. I was thinking about it on Friday and told my husband it was breaking my heart, and then realized it was real chest pain.

We don't know where we are going to be at the end of this year, but like I said this is the year of change. We are making big decisions about down sizing. We will offer the house for sale in the spring when the garden is the most beautiful. For now I am keeping Sammy, I can only take so much. It is a possibility that he may follow Roman and go to the same family down the road if it looks like we will need to be somewhere we can't have dogs. Sam is much smaller at 40 pounds I can train him to walk with me. Roman is so strong and he is magnificent at 70 pounds. We went to visit and the son took him for a run around the lake just like that. It was beautiful to watch. Since these are friends I can see him and bring Sammy over for a play day. That's not so bad.

Just thinking about going through this house and packing, sorting, keeping, selling, giving, makes me about come unglued. What a job! It's only taken 10 years to get it all organized and sorted and put away! Our plan is to have a much smaller mortgage or no mortgage. We are listening to God for guidance and direction. I wish we could just go somewhere else cooler, but that is probably not going to happen. I am so happy to have a fire in the fireplace and actually use blankets! It finally cooled off here. This is actually when I like MS most. We have sunshine and crisp cold air. It has been raining a lot, which makes messy muddy dogs but that is life!

I was really busy preparing for Christmas this year. I made 6 aprons loved all of them. Ended up too busy to even take pictures of them all but two. It was great to give home made things and bake cookies. We made a lot of butter cookies,( could that be a factor in the chest pain? ya think?) and pumpkin bread with pecans all kinds of delicious treats. I was so much more relaxed. I ordered a few gifts online for the Little's in Cali and did not even set foot in a mall for the entire month of December!

Guess what? The world did not end! I felt like a Who down in Whoville when the Grinch stole their Christmas and they sang anyway!!! My Grinch heart grew this year! Christmas came even better, more dearer, with the old celebrations of music, food, friends, laughter, and something home made. We enjoyed it so much more. I am not dreading the bills. I actually have a few more aprons to make when I get to them.

One special part of Christmas for me this year involved a family of friends that has 7 children. They love stuffed animals. I was wishing I could give them some new stuffed animals and knew that I would not. While visiting they brought out a big pile of their beloved toys that looked like a flock of velveteen rabbits. Missing ears, worn off noses, large rips with worn stuffing coming out, tails hanging by a thread and noses as well. The children asked me to take their animals to my "hospital," and fix them up. I really had to smile because God orchestrated all of this. They didn't know my wish, and I didn't know I ran a hospital for toys! As I re stuffed, and stitched I thought about how God does this for us. He takes us just as we are, worn from life, worn from being loved and the things that have ripped at us, and he very lovingly gives us a new heart, and begins to mend and repair, to bring us hope and new life. It was so beautiful these thoughts, as I restored these loved toys. I also got to give a gift to the children that only cost me my time and a few tears, and for them the animals they already loved so much.

These are the kinds of adventures I hope the Lord gives me as we go into 2013. We may not live in the same house or have the same pets, but there will be new people, new experiences and new opportunities to show love; might as well get excited!

2012-12-24T03:30:00.001-08:00

Merry Christmas! A Christmas Letter for 2012

It has really been years since I wrote a Christmas letter. After a while it seems like there is no way to catch up so how do you even start? Instead of catching up I’ll just tell you how we are right now and send you our love! Where I come from that ‘dawg’ will hunt.

Jimmy has become a fine carpenter. He started out "pushin a broom in an 8x12 4 bit room" when we first came to the south. He has progressed to finish work and has a partner and they keep each other entertained with dumb jokes and manage to make an income. It’s amazing really. They even look alike. If I had planned this letter this is where I would post a little picture of the two of them and center it in the middle of the page. However this is not planned, in fact this is late because it is December 21^st ( just in case we had the end of the world?--ONLY THE FATHER KNOWS!) and I haven’t even addressed the first envelope, so no picture. Just imagine if Jimmy had a brother who looked like him, and talked like him and made jokes like him; sometimes worse! That would be Don, Jim’s southern best friend.

I have not been employed which embarrasses me but it’s unavoidable. Years of steroids for asthma took their toll and I have had to pay my dues with orthopedic issues; nuff said. BUT the good news is you can’t keep a good girl down or a hyper one either so I manage to keep busy and volunteer my time. It seems God gives me an assignment every day of my life. I might not have a plan but I will have a job to do before the day is done. I have been teaching a ladies Life Group class which is the new terminology for Sunday school. It is multigenerational and the women have named our class the MsFits, if you need a home you’ll fit in with us. We have a diverse group of age, race, occupation, life situation, and God blends us into a cohesive and loving group. These ladies are the highlight of my week and it is my humble joy to lead them. God shows up big for all of us faithfully every Sunday in spite of the teacher.

Through some friends of ours that we met when we first came to MS I have started being involved in an inner city ministry downtown called We Will Go http://wewillgo.org. And this ministry has stolen and broken my heart. It is amazing to see what God has accomplished with one couple who would say yes to Him and do the unthinkable; move their little family into the heart of the ghetto. Seven years later there are two camps many renovated little houses, a pavilion for church, a food ministry, clothing ministry, mission’s bases overseas and many lives transformed by Jesus. Former drug lords are now serving others and travelling overseas to share their own story of what Jesus can do to transform a life! The whole thing has me shoutin glory to God or on my face having a snot slinging cry. God has placed a call on my life to this ministry and you can pray for Jimmy and me to be united in this. God’s will be done!

Our kids are all alive praise God. They are making their way in the world. They are old enough to write their own Christmas letters and share their own stories. What we get are photo cards which I love and they stay on my refrigerator all year being changed when the new ones come. Now you know how often I wipe down my refrigerator door. Oh well, when my life is over it really isn’t going to make a hill of beans difference how clean the house was.

Jimmy and I have been seriously discussing downsizing. We didn’t plant a garden this year. The zinnias came up on their own. In fact between perennials and annuals that reseed themselves the garden happens by itself but still needs weeding and watering. This yard seems bigger every year and so does the house and the amount of energy it takes to keep it up is more than either of us want to give. I have really lost the desire to have a lot of stuff and if most of my things hadn’t come from my family I think I’d have one big garage sale. This will work itself out over time and hopefully this year! We’d like to sell in the spring, when we can sell the garden with its nice house.

Kayla is home for Christmas and we haven’t seen her for 3 years and we are so glad. There aren’t words really for how we feel to have her home! Heather is our joy she is awesome. Jen and Lindsey and David have become good southerners and Jennifer has been so supportive of me and such a loving daughter. I can never thank her enough.

Jimmy’s batch is all good! We have such cute little grandchildren out in California it is a crying shame that we are separated. We can’t afford to go back so it would be over the moon cool if they all got the bug to live cheap and come our way. We could sure make somebody a good deal on our house DEREK ! Derek and Jamie go to our old church in Felton and live in the neighborhood we left behind. How is that for déjà vu? Brandon and Mary bought (AMAZING) a house in California and have two gorgeous children together and her son Chris. Jamie is in the same place, with his faithful wife and man-cub of a son Austin at 16 is GROWN!

Shaunaus is out here near us and works all the time and if she is not working she is cooking something wonderful. She is an undiscovered chef. Her latest toy is a smoker. There is no telling what she will come up with. I just want to eat it.

My good friends moved to Felton and their son Conrad is going to Belhaven because of my blog. How is that for a small world? Meredith came to visit and I just couldn’t get enough of her. I love that girl! It is awesome how friendships made long ago grow and deepen and just get better. Distance can’t erase love. Time can’t erase love. In fact nothing can erase love, especially the love that God has given to us through Jesus. It is the love of God that binds us together. This Christmas I have been reflecting on how truly humbling it was for the God of the universe to consider his position nothing, and let it completely go. To be born as a helpless baby feeling hunger, needing everything and grow up to become a man; amazing. We tend to think of Jesus as half man half God but he was fully 100% man, and fully 100% God. Part of his humanity though was growing by faith into the full realization of who he was and His purpose here. I really don’t think that Jesus had the master plan of the universe in his mind as a two year old. When you think about it like that, how it wasn’t an automatic ace in the hole, it’s really meaningful to read; that he was tempted in every way just as we are and yet without sin.

(Sin…ewww did she really say that in her Christmas letter?) Yeah I did because I want you to know what “sin” means. It’s simple, it means to miss the mark. If you are an archer and you don’t hit the bull’s-eye. The target is holiness and the standard is set by God. Perfect holiness is the only A game and if you miss the target even once you lose.

How amazing is it that God set the standard and then made a way to give you a perfect game?

Jesus stepped in and hit the standard in perfection and then paid the penalty for all of our mistakes. Justice requires judgment and penalty. If everyone that was ever sentenced got off Scott free why would we even have a justice system? We have an inner compass that screams for justice. We want payment for wrongs especially other peoples. It’s harder when we take a look within. When we do look and we do remember, and we do regret, that is when Jesus steps in and says,” I took the judgment for that, I did your time.” Jesus took it for everything, and everyone that is willing to receive it. What hurts me is that even if you don’t want it, he still took it. Every lash of the whip, every beard hair ripped out. In Isaiah it says he was marred beyond human recognition. He had to be God to survive to make it to the cross. He had to be God not to explode like a nuclear bomb with all that was heaped on him.

He was born to die, placed in a stone manger in a miniature version of his future tomb that we may truly live and never die. This Christmas it is our prayer that this Jesus who we love to serve and live to love, is the Lord in your heart and life. It is the greatest news we have ever heard and the hope in our hearts.

It doesn’t matter to me what is politically correct! In Colombia I learned from the people that whatever is the most important thing going on in your life; that is what you talk about FIRST. Your first conversation shows the highest priority in your life. We can learn from that. I learned from that. This Christmas I am sharing with you the highest priority in my life, Jesus. He took my heart of stone and gave me a heart of flesh. He gave me a future and a hope. He gave me peace. I hope with all my heart you are celebrating his birth, life, death, resurrection and peace too.

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

Love Karen and Jimmy

These Are a Few of My Favorite Things

2012-12-16T00:58:00.000-08:00

WELCOME to our cheery entrance! My cousin came over and did this and I think it's beautiful. My husband added some lights tonight, not our usual glitz fest like when the kids are home going berserk lighting everything that can have a light hung on it but it's definitely Christmas.

Inside too. Every year I cut cedar branches from the trees we brought here from California. We named them after them. Every year I tell the same story to my kids who can recite it now and ask me If I would like to show them where the trees are planted? Zing--- that makes me feel like an old lady.
I love the fresh cedar, it's not pine but it's free.

Jennifer and the kids decorated the tree they did a beautiful job. Once that happened it got me started. As I went through my decorations. I thought I have way too much of these things, but then there are the ones that are so special.

This one I bought in Mt. Hermon California at a crafts fair. I thought it was the cutest little baby Jesus. They used a miniature wreath and made this so simply. The end result just stole my heart. It was $1.

My old nativity set has born around for longer than I remember. I bought some fancy ones a couple of times and didn't keep them. I love the Willow Tree nativity set but it's got a pretty fancy price tag. This is the one the children have put out year after year. This is the one that makes me think of Evie's song about the little shepherd in the nativity scene trying to get closer to see the baby. I make sure he can see.

Jennifer made this out of tuna can in kindergarten. IT was the first thing she ever made for me at Christmas. She chose a bunny because her nick name when she was little was Bun-Bun or Bunzarellie. one if the ears is missing now.

This tiny mouse in half a walnut shell is one of the cutest ornaments I have ever had. An old boyfriends mother gave it to me. I really liked his mother, she sent cute ornaments at Christmas. We were pretty serious and when we broke up it hurt his parents. It broke my heart but then I ended up finding my true love. I hope he did.

This little doll was made by old ladies in the very first nursing home I ever had a job in. I was 22 years old. That makes this sweet little doll 34 years old she looks great don't you think? In my mind I see Anna smiling, drooling down the stroke side of her mouth while she is making this. I have never forgotten those old women from my first job. I treasure the few of these I have. To someone else they aren't anything at all, just a little out of style trinket. For me it's a memory of other lives and days long past.

My daughter painted this her first year back here. All my kids are such good artists. Wish I was. I think it's so cute. It'll be a keeper and come out every year.

Jennifer gave me a set of ornaments about the 12 days of Christmas and I put the entire set on a small tree in the dining room. I love the meanings of each of these symbols, especially the two turtle doves taken to the temple as an offering for the baby Jesus.

This season has been unique for me. I haven't been to the mall even once. I ordered some gifts for the little grand children in California off the Internet. I stood in line on black Friday for the first and last time to buy a printer that we needed. I got the great idea of renting a kiosk next year and selling coffee and hot chocolate to the people standing in those lines for hours. Ka ching!

This year I have been giving away my own special treasures, and found a lot of things that are really nice to give away for free. I still had plenty of jewelry to share and good books on the shelves. I am maing aprons.
If Christmas is about giving why does that mean shopping? Don't we have plenty to give? I thought of children who need one pair of shoes so they don't injure their feet in the dump while scrounging for something to eat. I thought of clean water projects, and changing the course of a families life by buying them a couple of chickens or a goat. These gifts just seemed so much more for the Christ child. It is His birthday we celebrate after all. Who else has a birthday where every one else gets the presents? As sweet as the lord Jesus is he doesn't begrudge us our presents. He enjoys the smiles of children. It was just more important to me this year to relieve some misery in the world, not because of me, I think I am finally beginning to just see. It's amazing how when we stop our own, "I want," talk and look around at how much we already have, how much easier it is to see those who have nothing.

I haven't been blogging because I don't even know where to begin. Last year I watched my friend Elysa have a house fire, rebuild her home, get called to Africa, downsize like crazy, give away all her animals and move to a ministry in inner city Jackson with her husband and seven children. She left a country hobby farm and moved into a rebuilt crack house. http://elysasmusingsfromgraceland.blogspot.com/2012/12/all-those-interruptions.html

Someone wise said, "Look around and see where God is working and join Him in it." You don't have to start a project. God is busy. Look around and see where He wants you and say yes.
I started going to this ministry in the ghetto. Now I am watching as God is showing us to down size, to sell our house , to relocate our animals and get ready to go wherever He asks us to go.
It's an amazing process. We have begun the journey. I know we are on the right path because I am not afraid, not even a little. I know it is right because I don't have any emotional need to hang onto things that have always held on to me. I am actually excited, very excited. It is like I have been waiting all of my life to begin to live and now this year, this special Christmas, we are being born.
We are getting ready in so many ways. Ready to see our family, ready to share gifts, ready for change, ready to serve, ready to have the most excellent adventure.

Like Bilbo Baggins who stepped out his door....

Yeah What the Turkey Said

2012-11-13T21:16:00.003-08:00

Just Talk

2012-10-27T13:07:00.002-07:00

I woke up early this morning. The weather changed from 82 to 48 in just a few hours and the bone in my hip is throwing a wall-eyed-hissy-fit. However I am excited to say that a fresh pot of veggie 15 bean soup is on the stove and I can wear a sweater today! I am very happy to pull out the warm clothes. Lying in bed this morning petting a big purring furball, my mind went back in time to other fall seasons, little girls in dress up clothes, visiting the punkin patch, and taking trips out to Watsonville for apples.

sigh... I have lived a great blessed life. My joy is full and my heart is grateful. All those years that seemed so hard have distilled down into a sweet savory cup; I only remember the joy.

the struggles--gone

the quarrels--gone

the stuff we never could afford like a swing set--didn't matter

all the stuff of worries--never happened.

How do I know that?

I pulled out picture boxes piled them high on the bed, with a good cup of hot Good Earth tea in hand, furball purring, and went through the visual reminders of my life, it was good.

I pulled out a bunch of costume pics to share that will be fun. It's work though I have to scan them into the printer and then onto the lap top but they are so cute I just might. No promises!

I have such a long list of stuff to do. I finally got a wedding present finished and in the mail. I made it. I am taking the time and effort to go back to my roots of home made. It saves money and it means more. But I am not the whiz I was. I have had aprons to cut out on the kitchen table long enough to gather DUST. Really? The good positive perspective is there is still hope that I will get to it! I didn't pack it up and put it away which means it will never get done. So there is hope.

I could lay out an excuse. I can't stand long because I have another CAST. This tendon has been messed up for 6 months. 6 weeks in the cast and then if it's still not healed another trip to the OR. Really I am a surgical junky, 10 surgeries in 25 years. A bit nuts! Everything with me seems to call for a knife.
But God. I am not complaining.

No worries.

How do I know that?

Because of two words; but God.

I went for my yearly ya know, it's breast cancer awareness right now. I had done a BSE and felt something different, not a lump but not right either, something thick and dense. I thought maybe it was because I can't raise my arm above my head so I figured I'd go in and get my physical.

My doctor didn't like it much. I went to the hospital for a mammogram and an ultrasound and they are both normal which is great news. But there is a but; my mother died of breast cancer and she was diagnosed at 45. My daughter has already had cancer and had a total hysterectomy at 30. So we drew the blood test a BR AC to see if I carry a mutation gene; but medicare won't pay for it because I haven't had cancer myself . The test costs over $3000. I don't have that kind of change. So much for government health care. It can only get worse! Politicians do not have any business regulating health care they have got it so screwed up we can hardly work, just ask anyone in health care.

Because of my family history I have a referral to an oncology surgeon on November 12th. We'll decide then what do about my mass if anything. I'm kind of leaning toward taking it out. It may be benign now but whose to say it will stay that way? I don't know. It's weird. I'm willing to listen to the experts first. That's why they get paid the big bucks.

I smell soup. I always said that if I ever got cancer I would do a juice fast and a vegan diet for healing. I have started that without the answer. I'm praying that by November 12th the mass is gone. My God loves me and He is able to do that. I would love to tell you that my faith and prayers, made that mass go away. What I can tell you now is that I have peace. I didn't at first, I cried and felt really scared and emotional. The mass in my breast is in the same place as my mothers was. Freaky.
BUT GOD whose arm is not to short to save. He is my rock and I am standing firm. I believe and it is good to be a believer. Times like this is when I really thank God that I am.

and just in case you haven't done it lately go get your mammogram or whatever screening you choose, because life is sweet it really is.

Springing Into Fall

2012-10-12T09:20:00.001-07:00

It's still warm here. The nights are cool and the humidity is gone so this is actually what I call our California spring. Perfect weather. It won't last long a few weeks, but each day is just spectacular.

It's a bit messy but that's how I roll here.

My 15 pound feline, totally spoiled rotten.

I have some ambitious ideas of turning men's shirts into aprons like this one.

This is a big stack of possibilities.

These are going to get made first if and when I get them cut out. I am desiring to become more productive again.

If I can quit losing stuff. I literally lose things that cannot be found anywhere in this house.

Do you think he is maybe burying my stuff in the yard somewhere?

I decided since it isn't so burning up hot that I could do a bit of something while I am sitting. Still waiting on that Achilles tendon to mend. This is my current project.

This is a finished baby blanket that I made for a friend, can't wait to give it to her. It would really be something if I could learn to follow a pattern. All I ever do is make blankets. I know there are books but I am a visual learner think a class is in order.

I have a new camera but I lost my manual before I could read it. So I am still shooting on auto. I'd like to learn how to take pictures instead of snapshots. I have a big pile of library books right now.
One on knitting and crocheting, two on digital photography that don't speak English, and a fun read called " What the Dog Saw," by Malcolm Gladwell. He is a journalist and this book is a compilation of his favorite articles over 20 years. He can take just about any subject and make it an interesting read. I definitely left my usual genre on this one and thoroughly enjoyed it.

Yesterday I baked a sweet potato pie and discovered why the butter has to be melted and not just softened. As you can see having the butter stay all in one spot didn't deter us from eating it. I was reading about pie crust in my JOY of cooking cookbook and I do believe I am going to get back into making pastry from scratch. I have been buying the rolled ones but now that they cost the same as a 5 pound bag of flour I think I will get back into making my own. My husband loves pie maybe I can make him a pie a week. That would be nice of me wouldn't it? I need to do something to earn my keep, as my mama used to say. Just wait until I turn the AC off, I'll really get hopping.

How about you? Has fall inspired you? Fall is really my favorite season. There is just something about the colors, smells, harvests, and fun that just never gets old. It's always a joy to smell apples and see pumpkins. The food is so great too, waffles with applesauce and just about kind of pie and soup. Now if it will just cool off enough for me to wear a sweater my joy will be complete!!

(and if I can find my lost stuff....)

Couch Potato Get UP!!

2012-09-18T12:36:00.002-07:00

What do you do when you really want to get some creative juices going? How do you get energy and excitement to begin a project? I have been struggling lately because of my feet. Inactivity and pain is a great recipe for watching your bohiney grow. I am feeling better now and my cast is off. I still can't walk a lot but I can get up and move around some. What I am really thankful for is a decrease in pain.
The main issue now is one of those physical laws about a body in motion tends to stay in motion and a body at rest tends to stay at rest. Picking up the remote and turning on the TV has become my first resort instead of my last.

A friend told me that Jan Karon's newest book, "Return to Holly Springs,' is a really great read. I decided to go to the library and check it out. It wasn't there so I ordered it and while I was there I began browsing. Do you ever think about how truly blessed we are in this country to have libraries? Free knowledge to all, at our fingertips. AMAZiNG!
I want to learn to knit. I can crochet. Knitted things are so beautiful.
I love goregous hand knitted multi color socks.
I have piles of yarn just waiting to be used.
There are babies coming that new blankets could adorn. Blankets I can work on while sitting.

Another book that caught my eye is this one about gluten free baking. Some of you have been going wheat free and losing your "wheat belly". I want to lose my belly, bohiney, and about one half of myself, so this looks verra interesting!

Of course you know a title like this has got to have something between the covers.

Yesterday I groomed Sam and bathed both the boys. That was my big feat of the day. When I bathe the dogs that also means that all the bedding gets washed, theirs and mine. Whatever happened my legs especially my thighs feel like they have had a major workout! Whew, feeling the burn.

The hair on Romans ears refuses to grow. I don't cut it off it just stays short. Sam's ears are already really long and pretty. He actually looks too pretty to be a boy, poor thing.

How about sewing? With limited funds buying clothes is definitely a no no. I don't NEED anything. Do you get depressed when you can't ever get anything new? I'm a greedy little punk so I do. I have material though. I'd like to make some shirts for fall. I found a couple of patterns that look really versatile. I cannot believe the price of patterns!!! GAH, nuf said.

Look at all this just waiting for a creative person to get busy and so something with it.

Everything is ready to go except me. Today I fixed some clean good food. Quinoa and veggies with carrot juice was breakfast and lunch.

That's already been a good bit to do today. To start getting off of the couch I'll sit in the chair, and read. It's a change anyway.

If you don't stop a car before you put it in gear you wreck your tranny.

Today I'll read some of these library books and think about getting from the couch, chair, bed, to the sewing room. Hopefully some of these books will be inspirational.

How do you overcome inertia?

Back to School

2012-09-13T10:10:00.000-07:00

Listening to people talk about going back to school brought back memories for me .
I was thinking about my childhood and lunch boxes. Did you have a metal lunch box? Do you remember what a status symbol your lunch box was? I always hoped to have the coolest one but never did. One year I thought for sure I had one of the best and this girl showed up with a drawstring bag, she had the only one and she got best lunchbox. She was also biggest snob.

What did you love about going back to school? Did you make book covers from brown paper bags?
Did you love the smell of new crayons? Did anyone else like to smell the leather in their new saddle oxfords? The most uncomfortable shoes ever made, I swear they felt like 5 pound weights. I begged my Mom for them and hated walking home in the heat with those monsters on. Me and Huckleberry we would have been buds.

I was kind of an academic kid. I loved the books. In elementary school I would read the "reader" the night I brought it home and then ask the teacher for a new book the next day. That didn't go over to well. It also got me tied to the chair.

If I was a child today there would be no hope for me. I could hardly manage to sit still between recesses unless I was really interested in what we were doing. Now there is no recess. We all looked forward to the lunch HOUR. That's where we made friends and played games or got into fights and all of that baloney. Kids today barely have time to eat and use the bathroom, they get 15 minutes at my grand kids school. I remember learning about the schools in Red China. The children wore uniforms and worked long hours without play. I felt so sorry for them. I don't see much difference between them and us anymore, in our schools.

Childhood is so short. There is enough time to cram data into our children's heads. In this day of information you really need to know how to find information. More importantly you need critical thinking and how to evaluate what you read. Children need to know how the world is made, how things grow, how to treat each other and learn to work. Makes sense that farm kids turn out so well. They get a lot of fresh air, sunshine and real life experience. I don't know why we turn over our most precious commodity; our own children to failing institutions, or any institution for that matter. Have you ever really thought about that?

I'm so grateful that I learned about home schooling and that my granddaughters were the beneficiaries of that. Those years were such joy for us. We were able to CHOSE what we wanted to study and where we wanted to study it. There is nothing like studying the sea at the beach!
The world is really your oyster when you teach your own.

It;s great to be able to take a big tote bag or basket to the library and go hog wild checking out books, and then read them! After the book is read you take it back not belabor it until what you learn is to hate reading. How do you know if a kid reads a book? You read it too and talk about it. Or they write about it and you read it. We think we need a degree to teach but teachers with degrees are so busy trying to maintain some sense of order and keep records of who is where doing what; how much time do they have? Even those with the best of intentions have a very tough time of it.

I was talking to a friend of mine the other day. She is a 6th grade math teacher in a poor school. They have a beautiful building. They have new stuff. The problem is the teachers came from that same neighborhood, they tell the kids they are stupid. A lot of my friends students are at the 2nd grade level. She can hardly maintain her class because of the rowdy behavior of the kids. What are those kids supposed to do? They have no time to run, they don't understand what's expected of them and they are told they are stupid. No government program will ever solve this.
We talked and were trying to drum up ideas to help reach the kids. Then I asked her how many students she has. Because kids are sent to a different classroom for each period she has 163 students. How on earth is she expected to inpact any one of them much less learn their names?

I admit that I was leary of teaching the girls in high school. For one thing I am challenged when it comes to math, my spelling is atrocious, and I still don't have good punctuation and grammer.
When your thinking about college you want your kids well prepared. I knew I could handle the elementary years. Then I found out how much is out there! We have on line schools for almost any age or subject. There are computer classes for anything you can't teach yourself and groups of other home schoolers to join and share activities with. The sky was the limit again. I never was big on work books or regurgitation. I taught the girls to think, to analyse, and they loved to learn. They love to read. They know how to find information. They know how to work hard. More importantly the have an artistic flair for life that is their own, they have knowlege about life itself and the world and how systems work together and are integrated. They are intelligent people. That is what education is all about isn't it? Can you tell I feel pasionate about this?

I have other memories of school. Memories of crying at my desk trying to write "I will not talk" for the 1000th time. Memories of being socked in the back by a teacher, of having my mouth taped shut.
Or how about being chosen last for sports? Knowing they don't want to chose you at all. How about being made fun of by other kids? How about being kicked by a group of girls for being friends with a little Mexican boy? School is educational alright. Educational for what?

I realize that many people enjoy school. There are excellent schools out there and dedicated teachers. What I am saying is to question it. Not everyone feels good about letting there children go away for the whole day. Those people don't have too! That is the beauty of living in America. The standards and requirements for each grade are in public domains. With research about compliance and great materials, a pubic library and some group activities, parents can opt to teach their own children.

The memories I have of little girls discovering the world with wonder are a priceless joy that I would never give away to someone else. I wanted them with me. I enjoyed relearning and watching them. Life through the eyes of a child make us look at the world again fresh. It's joy I tell you, pure joy!!

Our Silver Wedding Is Here

2012-08-31T12:42:00.001-07:00

Time goes by so fast doesn't it? I am really having a reminder of the speed of time because we have just hit the 25 year milestone in marriage. WOwZas!

I think about the weddings and dresses that are in vogue today and I think it is just NUTS!

Our entire wedding cost $300. My dress and shoes were one hundred dollars a fortune in those days. I actually bought my dress before Jimmy asked me. I loved it and I loved him. I was absolutely crazy in love. I reasoned that since it was peach I could just wear it, but I just knew we would marry.
People that in love have to marry! We also did NOT have an intimate physical relationship before we married. You may think that is bizarre but because I had given my heart to Jesus Christ I couldn't do that. Jimmy believed the same way so there was some serious kissing going on. Steaming up car windows at our age imagine....well don't.

But you know what? God made me a REAL bride that day.

What do you think of that leg huh? And look at all the hair Jimmy had! I just thought he was bald.

A friend of mine made our cake and gave it as a gift. What a blessing. I spend a hundred on flowers and a hundred for pictures. We were married outside on our pastors deck overlooking the beautiful mountains in California. The weather was perfect even in August. It didn't get too hot.

We had cake and punch. Our rings are gold bands.

Here's the thing. It's not the big wedding that a marriage makes. Sometimes beginning a marriage with those huge expenses starts it off on the wrong foot. Where do you go from there? The huge house the best cars, the big debts?

I loved our simple wedding. The flowers were gorgeous. The cake was perfect. The day was perfect. The dress was just what I wanted a pretty cotton. We were so in love it was hard not to cry.
Our pastor had to crack a joke because both of us were really going to cry. It was his fault the ceremony was amazing. So he cracked a little joke.

He asked Jimmy to put the fing on me ringer. We were laughing and then he said, "I can't believe I said that, I did that at my daughters funeral too." BWAHAAHHHHAAA
we didn't cry.

Tomorrow we are going to have a party. I am going to take pictures and share every bit of it with you.
I'm fretting because I have on this cast and I don't know what I am going to wear. I sure wish I still looked like that bride. I know I don't and my handsome man doesn't either but time has been kind to us in that we love each other more. We can't imagine life alone. We have nothing in common. We don't do anything special to cultivate our relationship, the credit is to God alone. It is our faith in Jesus Christ and our love for God that binds us together. God has given us love and more love. It is grace! When times have been bad and they have been we have been on our knees asking God to keep us, and He has done it. Christians say they will give God the glory for the great things He does. Sometimes we do in church and around each other. I think at times we are amiss to praise God in mixed company. Today I want to shout to the world that my joy comes from the Lord. My life has been redeemed and my marriage is a trophy of His goodness and grace!

The Survey Says...

2012-08-27T19:07:00.000-07:00

Isn't there some kind of game show that says, "and the survey says!" ? I'm sorry but that is the best I can phrase that question. It's a lack of hormones issue. My brain scan was normal. I can't claim dementia for an excuse and that makes me a perfect idiot!!! So my survey says estrogen loss and heat don't mix. Estrogen loss and intelligence don't mix either, that is kind of like water and oil.

The survey also says that these factors do not a good writer make. Structuring a cohesive thought requires that the thoughts are not rabbit trails. Wabbit wabbit.

For the past three months I have been struggling with my feet. A ruptured capsule in the Achilles tendon on the left leg and plantar fascitis on the right foot. I think both are the results of obeastity.
No typo there, my play on words. I have been working on weight loss. I stopped the Leanness Lifestyle University program. It is too regimented for my abilities. I don't like getting automatically generated letters that remind me to be successful I need to do x y and z. Not because I don't want to do x y and z. I cannot do x y and z. Not to much flex in the program. I did however learn a lot. If you have no physical limitations and you like to eat a lot of meat, go for it. I should be able to let an automatically generated letter not bother me right? Too type A, I guess. The survey is out on that one.
I have had a lot of trouble trying to get a partial refund. The coach just won't answer my emails. Guess I may have to just write off that hundred bucks. I could use the 6 months but I didn't want to get those letters and eat more chicken..... I don't like chicken that much. The survey is out on that one too.

OK that's enough beef. If I had to pay $10 a pound then boy howdy alright!!

I have been having a great time lately!
The survey is in on company and it's great!

My grand baby came for 10 days.

she had her birthday...

the pups luvved her...

the survey says she is prettier every year....

and our hearts grow fonder. Pa has the same birthday. 23 years ago she was a little 4 1/2 pound present.

Hummm look at the previous pic and then scroll down quickly, see anything different?
I swear that dog likes his picture taken.

Feelin the LOVE!!!

Sammy is smitten she called him Sambodian.

Why is it that once I begin to lose weight I look so overwhelmingly FAT?!?!?!?!?!!!!!
We are out celebrating birthdays and also our 25th wedding anniversary is coming up.

My brother and his sweet wife came for a weekend visit to celebrate birthdays too.
My hunny is 75. A very handsome and hunky 75, the survey says.
There is that dawg again....check the survey on poodles and cameras.

We also had little people come to visit. These two kept us in stitches they were so funny all we did was laugh.

Family love.

This beautiful lady is one of the biggest blessings in my brothers entire life. The poodle and the survey says, just sayin.

Projects Presents and Portrait Madness

2012-07-27T18:54:00.000-07:00

Remember these roadside finds? They look pretty in this picture but this white color was actually a mold and they were a big mess. But hey they were free and in this case someones trash really is my treasure.

Washed down and stained. AND my mama said to neva say neva because as soon as you do you'll be eatin them words. I used polyurethane. I used a lot of it!!!! Whahhhhaaaa it looks great.

Like I said they turned out so pretty we decided to bring them inside. I need to recover the cushions they are plastic coated.

Looks nice huh?

My hubbins bought birthday flowers. He is also sending me away to ~~give him a break and get me out of his bald head~~ see my girlfriend. I also got a sweet card and it had spending money in it for my trip.

Another project we had been tackling was to make the weed patch look like a flower garden again and it does.

These are the other two chairs I picked up off of the curb. Can you believe how great they fit in?

Here is some of my recent "art." I painted this table top with two colors of turquoise and then some stain to make this effect.

Also painted a second table. I wanted them to be the same colors but look unique. I wasn't trying to make them match.

A bit of rearranging pictures after the paint touch up. And I also painted the frame of this print.

This is the top of the dresser that needed the veneer removed. I love how it looks. It's several types of wood and it's distressed because it was actually made out of scraps.

Matched the stain and it blends well, didn't have to refinish the whole piece just the top. The hunny took off the veneer and then sanded it down with a belt sander and an orbit sander. I used steel wool between coats of stain and oil varnish. Hey that's my new camera in my hands in the reflection and Romans butt in the air, he's always gotta be in the action.

My daughter bought me this lamp for my new room and a new willow figurine. They were birthday presents and she couldn't wait to give them to me on my birthday she gave them to me early.

Then she went and bought me ANOTHER present! This one was ON my birthday.

She told me she loved me.

She had it gift wrapped and it was bee youuuu ti fullll.

Boo is taking their pictures. From here things began to get vera verra silly.

I never have on make up when the camera gets pointed my way.

Opening this beautiful package is really fun, I can't lie. It might be more blessed to give than receive but I can tell you from experience this receiving deal is fun! Yep, I like it!!!

And I love her. She is my beautiful beautiful girl.

You made me laugh yes you did!!

I can make a bigger chicken neck than you can..... no we di'int.....yes way we did.
That is some serious DNA there. Our wrinkles match.

My brain just did a tilt.

Oh yeah, I almost forgot to show you what was in the box! A beautiful maxi dress. Perfect for summer. It's purty.

Tommorrow I am going to sleep in. I hope I sleep until noon. I have nothing on my agenda, nothing ya hear me!!!! If I get an idea I'm going to call someone to come over and put me in my room and lock the door. No more ideas for awhile ok?
So ah what's cookin at your place?

We Visited Big REX

2012-07-25T17:49:00.001-07:00

Now that Nannie has wheels I can actually take my grands out to have a wee bit of fun! We decided to visit our local natural science museum. It isn't the Monterey Bay Aquarium which is one of the coolest places in the world to visit; but it was really fun.

The day we went the weather decided to have a severe fit of thunder and lightening. While we downstairs looking at MS sea life and SNAKES... the power went out and we were in the DARK.

My brave grands soldiered on. Actually the power outage was brief. It's a good thing because a few people were pretty freaked out. I would have rather the power went out when I was in front of something dead not a live venomous cotton mouth snake!! YUK! SCCCCCCRRRRREEEEAMMMM.

My grandson stood by this stuffed wild boar so you can see how big it is and how big he is. Ain't he cute? I love to tease and tickle him. I just can't help myself.

Who would think that so many different critters inhabit our state? Really it's amazing. I prefer the nasty bugs and snakes to be dead and in the museum. I will never be anything but politically INCORRECT when it comes to snakes. If it is poisonous and aggressive it needs to be dead. I did show the kids how to tell the difference. Garden snakes are alright. We saw some of those. I forgot to get a picture of our live two headed snake. It happens just like conjoined twins. Our two headed snake is not poisonous so I wish it a long life behind it's very safe glass gage or whatever that stuff is.

We decided that these robots might have been used in movies. We loved the scenes with the little ones hatching. They had sound effects and everything. This mother robotasuar looks smitten with her hatchlings doesn't she?

Look pa baby reptilians, the litter is arriving.

This is a dark picture but it is a flying teradactyl. Which prompted me to teach my grandchildren a poem. I do believe in educating our families ourselves. So I recited this poem for all to hear.

"Birdie birdie in the sky,

why you do that in my eye?

I'm so glad

that cows don't fly."

The poet would include teradactyls too. We decided that having animals of that size flying overhead would warrant always carrying an umbrella.

More reptilian babies....

We even saw robot blood.

A humongous skeleton. it was up in the air, we hoped that it was not something that was ever airborne. Nurses are sort of obsessed with how, what, and where, things plop.

He would leave a considerable amount of compost too.

This is some kind of sloth! Check out the claws on this dude! Good thing sloths move SLOWLY.

We had a volunteer to pose with Rex and show off his dental health.

A blurry panorama view.

And to da...the robot inards. Very cool. The eyes move and can seriously give you the creeps. The eyes on these robots looked very real. The way they move it looks like they can see you, with mouths obviously big enough to eat you....

but they do not and so we lived to tell the tail.

Finishing and Finding More to do

2012-07-17T16:31:00.000-07:00

My walls need to be touched up. We have rearranged until some places look like a pin cushion.

Have you ever wondered how to touch up your paint without re painting everything?

First you have to spackel the holes, let it dry, and then sand it with a fine grit sanding block.

Like I said there were a LOT of holes.

The secret is to roll in a W pattern. Any direction accept for straight rows.

Blend the paint out to the edges so that it's thinly applied where you want to stop painting.

If you look closely you can see the lighter areas where I painted.

I don't know what the pros do but I discovered this by trial and error.

These are the walls wet. I think you can see.

When it is dry it will blend right in and just look nice and clean.

I hit up all the worn areas and dirty spots and it will look like a new paint job without being a new paint job. How is that for a redundant sentence?

Like my grammer?

Yeah, I thought so.

I bought this mirror, from our local "junk" shop for the upstairs bathroom but my hubbins hates it.
I think it is really cool myself and I actually like it better than the big gold one.

My downstairs digs are coming along. I am amazed at how much work it is to change rooms.
I didn't move very much furniture. Moving just stuff and bathroom stuff is a big chore.
I'm ready to purge more junk. How do we collect so much crap in the first place?

I think I wear a junk magnet.

The dresser is coming along. The top isn't finished yet. I had to bring it inside to dry. The humidity would not let it dry out. The top is looking so cool, totally the distressed look. I like it that it was like that under the veneer. I was thinking today how weird it is that the scraps and "junk" of yesteryear is a lot better than what we use today. When is the last time you bought some solid birds eye maple to build with?

Hung the print and the mirror today. I love this print. It's a watersolor I picked up at an art and wine festival in Santa Cruz CA. I am not going to put too much else up. I like the walls plain with the nice warm cream paint. It's relaxing to have less visual stimulation.
I usually start with great intentions like this and that clutter it up again over time.
Resist resist.....

This picture is a truer color of the dresser. I am using 4 OOOO steel wool between coats of finish.
I use an antique oil that dries hard and has a low luster. I love that stuff it makes furniture gorgeous.
It also lets it breathe. I HATE polyurethane. Whoever thought of coating wood in plastic is crazy. Granted they did get rich because it's easy to apply, but it isn't good for the wood.
This oil is easy to apply. You hand rub in the finish. The more coats you add, the deeper the shine. I do a minimum of 3 coats of the finish and 2 coats of stain. I usually use more than one color of stain to get a more multidimensional color. This piece is not quite this yellow.
This dresser is actually the first piece of furniture I ever refinished.
I didn't know what I was doing, and it still turned out.

OK why am I showing you another shot of this?
Because I forgot how many other shots there are?
Because I wanted too?
Because I said so?
Nope.
So you can see my pile of new wash rags.
New paint touch up, and new wash rags, and rearranging stuff,
shoot fire, it's like a whole new house!
I am so easy to please.
Who gets excited over new wash rags?
I do. Now you know.

Tomorrow I'll work on the bathroom. I'm a glutton for punishment.
My feet have given out. I still had mental energy but my body is sooooooo pooped.
I decided to write this post with my feet up.
They are on fire.
My hip is screaming at me.
I shouldn't be doing this.
But if I don't who will?
Are you coming over?
Well maybe next year.
But in the meantime, if I blog I can be OCD while sitting down.
See, how your helping me out?
Your saving me from myself.
Someones gotta do it.

Projects remaining in the carport. The two chairs are still in process. They look like different colors because they are. The chair closest to ummmm us, Has been sprayed twice with golden oak.
It's not the color I liked when I washed them and got them really wet. So I picked up a different color and will spray them down AGAIN. Then the boat varnish. Boat varnish is very cool stuff.
Think about it. It is made to be in salt water all the time.
That stuff PROTECTS!
We finished a pair of french doors in natural stain and boat varnish and they never did age.
They stayed looking brand new for years.

The table has MORE projects. That red basket has marked up nearly every door and wall in my house. I keep toys in it for little kids to play with when they come over.
The kids like to haul the basket around by themselves, and everywhere they bump into something a bit of red stays behind.
I am going to prime it and re paint it, so that I can quit with the red skid marks everywhere.
The other project I need to finish is to stain the doors for my desk.
I have had those for over a year.
It's ridiculous how I can procrastinate.
Except for right now.
I am doing pretty good!

I was doing well on the Leanness Lifestyle diet and then I blew it on Sunday. We went to a POTLUCK. My plate had small portions of a lot of different things and I was definitely too full.
It's weird, after getting too full I couldn't quit eating. Seriously I can control myself better if I don't over eat. Once I started I had signed up for a binge.
There is no way I was going to enter all that into the computer either.
I'm tired of this already.
I am not tired of cutting back and eating less.
I'm tired of the program. I suppose it keeps me accountable, making me enter every bite I eat.
What a pain.
Now that I have more of my meals in it though I can enter them with one click.
It's new items that take time, and a potluck? Well, that could have me entering data until next week so ---pass.

Whatcha all up too?

Not just one but 7

2012-07-14T18:43:00.001-07:00

Can creativity become certifiably crazy?

Remember this little end table that has seen it's better days?

It's been in the process of being transformed. I painted it and it was a little bright so back to the drawing board.

I used a sander and did a little distressing and then sporadically added some of these 2 finishes.

The result made it look a bit older and took away the brightness. The result is really pretty and unfortunately my camera didn't do a very good job. The photographer has absolutely no blame in the matter, this is strictly technical difficulties.

Nothing like finishing one thing and starting 6 more. My daughter returned some dressers and the tops needed work, so why not? I'm moving back down stairs and I want a fresh coat of paint on my painted pieces of furniture, so why not?

35 years ago I put a replacement piece of birds eye maple veneer on this chest. It had buckled and chipped until it needed to be removed. My honey did that and then he sanded the top down. It is perfect for the distressed look. The top is an assortment of scraps. Different nicks and marks are present. I won't have to do anything except stain it and finish it. I think it's going to be gorgeous.

I sprayed the rocker with a fresh coat of cream paint. My hunny is going to use his sprayer and paint these other pieces with oil based paint so they will look awesome!

I have sprayed this with a stain and sealer. I am going to need a darker shade to achieve the look I'm going for. When I get it I'll spray it down with boat varnish. That will flex in the weather and also protect it really well. From there I'll have to see about some out door fabric to recover the cushions. Like I said can a burst of creativity be certifiably nuts?

If I was doing all this work by myself then i would get someone to come to the house and take me away. HOWEVER my handy fella was off this week and he was not opposed to working on a few of my ideas so hhhhhhooooooooo wweeee we di rawk on!!! When it dries I'll show you my big reveal.

I hope yawl are having a wonderful weekend it is raining here. I treated my self to a movie and went to see the Avengers, it was so fun! I luv me some superhero action.

Losing it and Gaining

2012-07-11T18:47:00.000-07:00

I am down 5 pounds in the first week and haven't even really been on target yet. Now that is some encouragement! Once I actually make the goals it should really kick into gear! Good by fat fanny!

Tommorrow I'll try to get some pictures together. My brain is in the think tank. I am planning to move back down stairs. Hopefully that will give my hip enough of a break to get back to where I can do other exercises that are more beneficial.

I have at least a dozen painting projects in the works.....

walls, furniture and other ideas.....fabrics etc...

It's amazing, where did all this creativity come from?

What I am is TIRED of CHICKEN

2012-07-09T12:34:00.001-07:00

I have no sticky left in me. For a person who has always been so tenacious and determined, not to mention a control freak; what has happened to me?

I have really great "why's" for losing weight. I am entering my pros, which means all the benefits to become leaner and healthier. It's only been 6 days since I started and man do I want to quit.
I like lists but taking all the ingredients over to the computer to enter the foods I eat takes a long time. Then once it's entered I can't change the serving size. Bother.

I don't like dry white meat. I don't like just egg whites. I am a bit of a spoiled brat in that if food doesn't taste good to me I'd rather not eat it. This is a fat lady in a pout.

The percentage goals of fat, carbs, protein, aren't that easy to meet. I never do get the calories right. I am always way under the right amount. You might think that's good but no it will probably slow me down. After my first few days of activity my hips are so seized up that they only feel better in bed. Just weight bearing is bad.

Alrighty then so what is going on for the bright side of life?

LLU Day 4

2012-07-06T19:28:00.005-07:00

What a week! I'd like to try and describe how quickly I am learning and how revealing it is. For many years I have thought that my knowledge of nutrition was pretty good. I don't eat very many processed foods. I believe in buying organic whenever possible, eating whole grains, whole foods and smaller portions. I know I like sweets and thought THAT was my problem. Sweets contribute but they aren't as much of a problem as I thought. Even with no sugar my diet is way off.

What I have discovered already is that my choices, even when I am making an effort to chose wisely are really off. My calories are too low. The fat and carbs are way too high and the protein is too low. All of that adds up to fat storage and hyper insulinemia. Most obese people are also malnourished. I have known that but not understood how it happens. I just assumed that overweight people eat junk.
That isn't necessarily so.

Think about just how easy it is to get sabotaged. Too much of the wrong things, too little of the right things, a dessert, or a quick purchase of a prepared food that looks low cal and really isn't. Then lets add in too little sleep and too little activity like exercise, too much stress and presto; weight gain.
It's already making sense. Most of us can keep it together until we are 30, except now childhood obesity is seriously on the rise; as we age our battle with weight gets harder and harder.

I'm finding the Internet program easy to use, obviously informative, and their are real people willing to help support and teach me! Wow how awesome is that?

Another positive note. We found a little car tonight!!!! I'll take a picture tomorrow. I am so tired tonight. Even positive changes are exhausting. I'll be able to get into the pool to exercise again soon and I am on my way to health and wholeness.

Thanks again Janie F. If you wouldn't have shared I wouldn't have seen or heard or believed.
That's a lot like the gospel, good news.
This is good news.
I am feeling something I haven't felt since I went on disability. HOPE.
Hope to be better, stronger, thinner, healthier, and able to move, go work, and live.
That feeling my friends has my soul singing.

Independance Day for Me

2012-07-04T10:07:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I turned the TV off and decided to really catch up on my favorite blogs. I sort of had my blog in order; or out of order since my last two posts should be reversed. But what the hay? Who has high expectations in a heat wave? I'm just trying to keep cool man.

I decided to go see what Janie Fox was tongue in cheeking about because that woman is good for some laughs. I like funny people. Janie was so easy to sidle up next too because we have a lot in common.
We are almost the same age.
We both have short hair.
We both are a bubble off of plumb.
We are both mothers, grandmothers, and wives.
She has an inner hippie that won't die. Just look at her house.
and we are ~~both fat.~~

Scratch that. I am fat she is not. I double dog dare you to look.

http://janiefoxtalks.blogspot.com/2012/07/not-ending-but-beginning.html

Are you fat? How come we won't talk about it? I lost weight a few times. One time I lost enough weight that people started telling me I was too skinny. It ticked me off. I felt like saying, "No, I am not too skinny, your too fat." yeah mean right? But now I am fat for real. In those days I was overweight. In those days it was 20 pounds, or 30 pounds, or 50 pounds which I did lose and slowly regained plus more; and now it's like 60 to 80 pounds depending on how much courage I have.

I am way sucking in my gut. My face is red because it's hot and if I exhale my gut is going to pop back out.

Shew that's over let me finish this. Notice the crushed couch cushions?

My feet are still little. I am very small boned. My ring finger was a 4 before I left the overweight class and advanced to the oBEAST class.
My little feet are screaming at me every day. They hurt. They really really hurt. They cannot carry all of this around. When I look into my future what I see is a walker and a wheelchair.

But Janie did it. She not only did it she linked to a friend of hers.
http://thenuthousefive.blogspot.com/2012/07/before-and-after.html

and I double dawg dare ya again to go look at her too!!!!!

and another one!

http://talefromthecoopkeeper.blogspot.com/

OK so now I'm thinking really? Is there hope for me? Could I actually set my tranny in reverse?
OF course it will help if it stops first or I may lose my transmission but I mean these women aren't teenagers here. They aren't skinny women showing an inch of pinch either. I mean seriously when you are any size below a 10 trying to get into a 2 you should just zip your lipper.
It demoralizes us hopeless people.

I was very judgemental of fat people when I weighed 140 pounds and worked in the hospital in orthopedics. A lot of total knee replacements are done on obese people. Your body wears out hauling an extra couple of 50 pound bags of dog food around everywhere. You know what I mean?
I am always in a hurry to set heavy stuff down, but I carry 94 extra pounds around 24/7.
I'm not so judgemental now.

Total knees are only the beginning. There are so many other health problems and diseases.
So here is the real shaming part.
I can sit at this computer where you can't see me, and share advice.
I do KNOW BETTER.

I have been an RN since 1992. I have studied nutrition. I was a health nut in my hippie days and sugar wasn't even in my house! MY kid left home and bought Twinkies and wonder bread in total rebellion. She has never eaten halvah for a sweet treat again. I was a zealot.

What happened?
Man life happened. Asthma happened, steroids happened, falls happened. I got "saved" and quit my old lifestyle of drugs, sex, and rock and roll and went to Baptist potlucks full of gluttony.
I don't believe in coincidences. But it just so happens that right now in my ladies Bible study we are learning from a DVD series by James Robison and Robert Morris on "LIVING FREE" being delivered of whatever bondage we are in.
You see Jesus didn't come to have me stop one set of behaviors to embrace another even deadlier behavior. His spirit sets us free, we can't do it.
Living Free

Jesus also sends us help and ways to be free. I checked out what Janie and the other women did to reverse their course and this is it.
Leanness Lifestyle University

Now I am not through double dawg daring you today. The first month cost 5 bucks, the price of a good hot fudge sundae. I checked it out and I signed up.
Today I am totally terrified. I am not going to give in to fear though. I am going to go over there and open my "to do" list for today. I really don't think it's going to tell me to go run a 5 K.
I bet it won't tell me to stuff myself on raw spinach all day or eat 6 grapefruits.
It probably won't tell me to take a magic belly fat pill, or skip two meals and eat just one.

A friend of mine is going to school and was talking about the HEAP of work her teachers were piling on over the 4th of July. I remember it well. I told her to eat an elephant one bite at a time.
I think maybe that concept can work in reverse too.
You can lose an elephant one bite at a time.

It's INDEPENDENCE DAY.
We celebrate freedom today.
Freedom isn't free without discipline and sacrifice.
Freedom can't be kept if we aren't fit and ready for whatever comes.
Yesterday, I realized that I can become free.
I don't have to stay this course that leads to the nursing home.
I can change one bite, one day, one to-do list at a time.
I double dawg dare you to join me.

Confessions of a Curb Cruiser

2012-07-02T22:07:00.000-07:00

How proud are you? If you could have these chairs just for the taking would you do it?

Apparently I have no shame because they are mine and it was legal.

On trash day I drove by these two rattan chairs. My neck nearly whiplashed as I did a double take and then slammed on the brakes and into reverse with the speed of a southern tornado. I love driving a pick up truck. The tranny is still in it too. A neighbor happened to be walking by and he put them in the back of my truck for me, as a nice southern gentlemen would. I was giddy I tell you. Somedays I have the luck!
These need some work but I have the time. I'll show you the progress as I go.

These dining chairs were also on the curb. One full truck load and I'm on my way.
You can sort of see this little French Provincial end table, it was a gift.

Weeded watered and partially planted, whoot hoot!! I know I have the heat stroke because I am insane to even be outside. The morning is alright and the night, but this has been a heck of a heat wave.
The good news is that with the lack of rain the mosquito numbers are down. I can actually enjoy an evening outside without being eaten alive. I think the heat has even gotten to them nasty critters.

Now that it's cleaned up I have to water every day to keep it alive. GAH! This is the south we sweat buckets here for natural green, usually. Come on if I din't gripe about somethin in summer I really would be sick. The older I get the more I dream of snow and fog. Pools are nice. What I end up doing is sticking my head under the hose and then drinking out of it just like a kid. Our water is good here. It tastes good anyway. I know, don't say anything!

So much better than knee high weeds. I have had some help from friends too!

Plants real plants! Hallelujah.

I have decided the only part of myself that is really photogenic anymore is my feet. How they hold me up is beyond comprehension. I am ashamed of myself for all the fat ladies I have ever judged, before I became one. For all the bones I have broken it would sure be convienent to have my jaws wired shut for awhile. Just kidding, not really, no more pain please!

Sammy is so cute just a little digression. I am so crazy about this little guy. I know Roman gets jealous. I just can't help it though. Sammy always wants to be right next to me and he is cute.

CUTE I SAY!!!

He is also easy to groom. PURRRRRFECT.

The front of the house these days. Notice something missing?

One pick up truck load of plants to fill in where the weeds had taken over. Not picked up from the curb thank you very much. Also legally acquired.

I'll show you the finished product soon.

Right now I am trying to keep it alive!

Everything is trying to burn up.

Including me.