Friday the Thirteeners

April Tucholke Takes The Truth

2012-05-25T06:00:00.000-04:00

Okay, so my turn to fess up again. Laura wrote in and truthed me this: What is the worst thing you’ve ever read?

I’m going to cheat a bit, because the poem below is both one of the worst things I’ve ever read...and one of the best. It was written on plain, lined notebook paper, in a gender neutral hand. I found it in a tiny drawer inside a wobbly little table in the coffee shop I used to frequent back in college. Who wrote it? Why did they love chicken so much? Why is it so...strange? Why paste, of all things?

Chicken.
White. So Glorious.
A beak for rummaging.
How I long to pet your white feathers.

Come to me as I yearn to boil you in water. And nibble on your flesh.
Eat you. Eat you. Eat you.

I feed you only to kill you.
Your feathers are the color of paste.
I like paste.

I paste when the wind blows.
As the wind blows through your feathers.
Your feathers, the color of paste.

Did you write this poem? If so, then…I love you. Write me at fridaythethirteeners[at]gmail[dot]com and tell me the name of the coffee shop where I found it, so I know it’s really you.

Questions:

1. What's the worst thing you've ever read?
2. What are your favorite chicken poems? Are there any other chicken poems? Besides, of course, that brilliant one by William Carlos Williams...love that sucker.
3. Fill in the blank: So much depends up a ___ ___ glazed with rain water beside the ___ ___
4. What's the worst/best line in the poem above? I paste when the wind blows or I feed you only to kill you or Come to me as I yearn to boil you in water?
5. Can you write a chicken poem as good as this one?

Next up: Ellen Oh. Send her truth and dares here. If you are a published (or soon to be published) author, sign up to guest post with us.

DUALED Cover Reveal!

2012-05-23T00:10:00.003-04:00

One of the best parts about being part of this wonderful group of tremendously talented authors is that we get to celebrate with them when amazing milestones are achieved. And the first public milestone (after the deal is made) is usually the book cover. So we Thirteeners are incredibly happy and proud to share our very own Elsie Chapman's cover for her fantastic book DUALED.

Ok, not only is this one heck of a cool looking cover, but did you check out that tagline?

You or your Alt? Only one will survive.

That tagline is just about as cool as the book! And the book, the book!!! What can I say about the book other than it is freaking awesome!!! It deserves all these exclamation points I'm throwing around like confetti here! Don't believe me? Read this:

Would you live through the ultimate test of survival?

The city of Kersh is a safe haven, but the price of safety is high. Everyone has a genetic Alternate—a twin raised by another family—and citizens must prove their worth by eliminating their Alts before their twentieth birthday. Survival means advanced schooling, a good job, marriage—life.

Fifteen-year-old West Grayer has trained as a fighter, preparing for the day when her assignment arrives and she will have one month to hunt down and kill her Alt. But then a tragic misstep shakes West's confidence. Stricken with grief and guilt, she's no longer certain that she's the best version of herself, the version worthy of a future. If she is to have any chance of winning, she must stop running not only from her Alt, but also from love . . . though both have the power to destroy her.

Elsie Chapman's suspenseful debut weaves unexpected romance into a novel full of fast-paced action and thought-provoking philosophy. When the story ends, discussions will begin about this future society where every adult is a murderer and every child knows there is another out there who just might be better.

DUALED will be out on February 26, 2013 from Random House. Mark it on your calendars!

Congratulations, Elsie! Your cover is absolutely fabulous, just like you!

Photo credit: Michael Meskin

Alison Cherry Takes The Truth

2012-05-22T06:00:00.000-04:00

Our guest author today is Alison Cherry.

Bio: Alison Cherry is originally from Evanston, IL and now lives in Brooklyn, NY. Before she started writing, she worked as an electrician, a theatrical lighting designer, and a photographer for the Metropolitan Opera. Her debut novel, RED, is coming from Delacorte Press in the fall of 2013. Visit her at www.alisoncherrybooks.com or (@alison_cherry).

Alison chose this truth from Chantele Sedgwick: If you could switch bodies with any character for a day, who would it be and why?

YA Characters I'd Most Like to Switch Bodies with For A Day:

1) Katsa from GRACELING. I freely admit that the biggest draw here is Prince Po, on whom I have a MASSIVE crush. (I may or may not have written an entire gushy blog post on why Po is so dreamy.) But I also wouldn't mind seeing what it's like to be able to win a fight with a mountain lion with my bare hands or to shoot arrows accurately in the dark. My only reservation is that Katsa would have control of MY body for a day, and I have this feeling she wouldn't respect that body's limitations. I'd probably wake up with a concussion and several of my limbs in casts.

2) Lola from LOLA AND THE BOY NEXT DOOR. I am not a terribly splashy person on the outside, but deep inside me lives a flamboyant girl who longs to be free. I would LOVE to play dress-up in Lola's closet—actually, that's probably what I'd spend the entire day doing. Oh, and making out with Cricket Bell, swooniest boy in all the world after Prince Po. I'm not sure Lola would like hanging out in my body for a day, but I do have a couple of wigs and fun hats to make her feel at home.

3) Hermoine Granger. I mean, if I could be a witch for a day, why not be the smartest, most accomplished witch? Plus, Hermione has a Time Turner, which I could REALLY use, especially during revisions. Actually, if I used the Time Turner, I could stay in her body for way longer than one day. I could.... wait, I might be overthinking this.

4) Zuzana from DAUGHTER OF SMOKE AND BONE. I don't think I'd enjoy being Karou—all those angel/demon conflicts would stress me out, and Akiva's not really my type. But if I were her best friend, I'd still get to live in Prague and be an artist, and maybe Karou would give me some scuppies so I could have little wishes every once in a while. And I'd be able to walk in really tall shoes, something I suck at in real life. Plus, it's pretty much my goal in life to be as funny as Zuzana.

YA Characters I'd Least Like to Switch Bodies with For A Day:

1) Fire from FIRE. Sure, my red hair causes problems sometimes. It's impossible to hide in a crowd. People I met once for two minutes are always recognizing me on the street, and I never have any idea who they are, leading to some intensely awkward situations. But Fire's red hair makes men want to rape her and monsters want to eat her. So I'll stick with my own non-magical hair, thanks very much.

2) Tris from DIVERGENT. I would be THE WORST DAUNTLESS EVER. I'm afraid of everything. I hate heights. I could never jump out of a moving train. It would take fourteen years to go through my fear landscape. And one of the things I like least in the world is needles, so I would NOT take kindly to being injected with various serums at every turn. *shudder* Let's be honest, I'm Amity through and through. Give me some banjos and hydroponic plants and leave me alone.

3) Katniss from THE HUNGER GAMES. This seems fairly self explanatory. Not a huge fan of killing people, running for my life, sleeping in trees, getting my flesh charred, being stung by genetically altered insects, or eating raw grousling. Plus, when it comes down to it, I'm not really Team Peeta OR Team Gale. However, if I got to be Katniss on the day she went to that crazy Capitol banquet and ate everything in sight, maybe I could be convinced.

Next up: April Tucholke. Send me truth and dares here. If you're a published (or soon to be published) author, sign up to play.

Shannon Messenger Takes the Truth

2012-05-18T06:00:00.000-04:00

Phew--it's been a CRAZY week (and I ALMOST forgot that it was my turn!) But I remembered just in time, and I decided to tackle a truth (despite having SEVERAL evil dares in the queue with my name on them *ahem*. I will get to one of those next time, I promise!)

Anyway, I'm tackling a question a LOT of you asked, so I hope you enjoy!

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Shannon Messenger graduated from the USC School of Cinematic Arts, where she learned--among other things--that she liked watching movies much better than making them. So she left LA and moved to suburbia where she would have time to eat too many cupcakes, own too many cats, and write lots and lots of books. LET THE SKY FALL is her first young adult novel, coming in Spring 2013 from Simon Pulse. She is also the author of KEEPER OF THE LOST CITIES, book one in a middle grade series launching Fall 2012 (S&S Aladdin). Find her online at shannonmessenger.com.

Kristen Kittscher Takes the Dare

2012-05-15T08:00:00.000-04:00

For this week's guest post, Thirteener Elsie Chapman dared author Kristen Kittscher to do a write-up based on a truly hilarious Twitter conversation discussing potential book titles.

Bio: Kristen Kittscher’s debut middle grade mystery THE WIG IN THE WINDOW (Harper Children’s) will be released in Summer 2013. It follows the comic misadventures of two tween sleuths who suspect their school counselor is a dangerous fugitive — and just might be right! A former middle school English teacher, Kristen lives in Pasadena, California with her husband, Kai. When she’s not writing, you’ll find her running her after-school tutoring business or taking orders from her hopelessly spoiled pets. You can follow her antics on Twitter, her website, or at the YA/MG mystery writers' blog, Sleuths, Spies & Alibis.

I knew the title of my middle-grade mystery/comedy, THE WIG IN THE WINDOW, offered the potential to spawn some equally mysteriously silly sequel titles. After all, there’s not much of a limit to alliterative weird things that can be placed in architectural features: The Rhinestone in the Rootcellar! The Pancake on the Patio! The Lollipop on the Lanai!

However, I didn’t realize the true wealth of possibilities until I announced my recent sale of WIG’s sequel, THE TIARA ON THE TERRACE. Title silliness took over my Twitter feed. Some felt strongly I should continue my head-centered theme: THE HEADGEAR IN THE HALLWAY. THE EARLOBES IN THE EAVES. Others felt that a dental focus could prove interesting. THE VENEERS ON THE VERANDA. Yet more – indeed, maaaaybe a Friday the Thirteener I know – let things turn, um, south? There was talk of other P words, a pantry – and a mystery we were all certain we didn’t want to solve.

The richest potential, though, lay in new genres. Why limit myself to middle grade mystery? Versatility is key in a landscape of ever-changing publishing trends. Dystopians are big. Maybe it’s time for THE ACCORDION IN THE ASHES, my futuristic look at a world in which polka music has died and destroyed civilization along with it. Paranormal romance might be fading, but maybe I could bring smexy back and stay true to the teeth/head theme with THE FANGS IN THE FOYER.

Perhaps the wisest career advice was the suggestion that I write erotica for the very mature with THE DENTURES ON THE DUVET. It is always good for career longevity when a fan base can age up with an author. Way, way up.

But why stop at the human – or even otherworldly – realms? A literally captive audience in homes across the world has long been ignored, with nothing but the occasional Animal Planet show and access to a window. For years they’ve had to be content playing second fiddle in cozy mysteries or cuddling up with the likes of Dr. Evil. It’s high time they get out of the litterbox and into the spotlight.

I bring you – courtesy of a Friday the Thirteeners dare – an excerpt of the first thriller for the feline market, THE WHISKERS IN THE WOODSHED. In this scene, two kitten sleuths are spying on their school counselor. Those who accuse me of having taken an excerpt from THE WIG IN THE WINDOW and doing a find/replace with cat names are spreading vicious lies. It’s well known that cats have school counselors and opposable thumbs. Also, I changed at least 10 other words:

I caught a glimpse of a black shape in the flower bed directly under Dr. Snuggles’s kitchen window. My tail went stiff. It was Mittens. She was going to get us caught. I knew she was.

“Get your binoculars, Fluffy.” Mittens’ meow quavered over the walkie-talkie. “Now.”

From inside came a dull grunt and thwap of a cleaver. In a daze, I rummaged in the catpack. My paws shook as I adjusted the binoculars and looked toward Dr. Snuggles’s kitchen. A slight gap in the blinds gave me a direct view.

Still holding the phone tucked between her shoulder and neck, Dr. Snuggles hunched over something on the floor. I chuckled, relieved. Mittens was playing it all up, of course. It’s not like you can murder someone while chit-chatting on your cell. I was about to lower the binoculars when my eye caught sight of the cleaver.

I gasped. It sat on a large carving board, smeared with blood. Even more blood pooled in the board’s gutters like a moat. Splatters of crimson covered the sink, the faucets, and the tile countertop.

Dr. Snuggles hoisted something up then let it thud to the floor. On her second heave, I saw it was an oversized trash bag.

The Director of Counseling at Luna Vista Middle School had just butchered someone with a cleaver, and now she was cleaning up the body parts as if she were gathering some old odds and ends for Goodwill.

Dr. Snuggles looked up. Mittens must have seen it when I did. Emblazoned across her downy white fur were the unmistakable outlines of two bloody pawprints. In their final moments, grasping claws had streaked long red ribbons down her chest.

“Run!” Mittens yowled.

Will Mittens and Fluffy escape Dr. Snuggles in time? Find out...in THE WHISKERS IN THE WOODSHED! Coming soon — or whenever feline literacy rates catch up.

Of course, while these upcoming projects will certainly keep me busy for quite some time, I'm always on the look-out for new title and genre ideas. What do you suggest?

(Many thanks to Lucky 13ers Alison Cherry, Elsie Chapman, Emma Pass, Caroline Carlson, Debra Driza, and Brandy Colbert for their title suggestions and Twitter rowdiness.)

Thanks so much for playing, Kristen! The hashtag world may never be the same again.

Thirteener Shannon Messenger is up for Truth or Dare this Friday! Submit one to her here; if you're an author and would like to play, contact us here!

Natalie Whipple Takes The Ultimate Dare!

2012-05-11T10:56:00.001-04:00

Okay, so it's Natalie's turn to post today, and us Thirteeners sent a pretty big dare her way.

Hey Nat, we dare you to have a baby!

And because she's so awesome, she did!

Major congrats on your baby boy, Natalie, and we hope you guys are all doing spectacular! Pics, we need to see pics!

Make sure to come back on Tuesday, May 15th, because the lovely and fabulous MG author Kristen Kittscher will be dropping by!

UPDATE: Hi! This is Natalie—and I honestly had NO CLUE that I was up for a dare today. HA. Thanks, guys, for cutting me some slack. Baby and I are doing well, and since this IS my week I totally owe you guys pictures. So here you go! Two exclusive pictures of the new little dude:

Stephanie Kuehn Takes The Dare

2012-05-08T06:00:00.000-04:00

For this week's guest post April Tucholke dared author Stephanie Kuehn--whose debut book is set in a boarding school--to tell a wild story from her own private school days.

Bio: Stephanie Kuehn holds degrees in linguistics and sport psychology, and is now working toward a doctorate in clinical psych. When not reading, writing, or madly cramming for an exam, she can usually be found outside, playing with her family. Stephanie lives in Northern California with her husband, three kids, and many, many animal friends. Her young adult debut, CHARM & STRANGE, will be published by St. Martin’s Press in 2013. You can connect with Stephanie on twitter or her website. She also blogs for YA Highway.

And the story:
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Okay, so I was asked to share an embarrassing boarding school story. This should be easy, I thought, but now, as I sit down to write I realize there are so many embarrassing stories I could share. Like the time I heard through the gossip grapevine that a senior boy had a crush on me. Said boy also had chicken pox at the time, and even though I’d never had the pox (and still haven’t had them to this day), I went and visited him in the infirmary. Yes, I sat there in a cloud of his scabby germs and attempted to flirt, only to learn the following day that he’d been talking about “a different Stephanie.” Sigh.

However, the story that haunts me to this day is one that’s perhaps more shameful than embarrassing. See, boarding school isn’t all that different from any other kind of prep school—you have a large group of achievement-oriented teenagers who, during their free time, kind of just want to go crazy. Only at boarding school you live with your teachers 24/7, which means you’re accountable to school rules 24/7. This leads to a lot of sneaking around.

The school I went to was known as an “artsy” school. This meant, first and foremost, that we were bad (really bad) at sports. It also meant that the other schools around us thought we were weird. And, in fact, we were kind of weird. Case in point: the two boys who started the school “Bingo Club.” Every month or so, these guys would get on stage during our boring morning assembly and stutter through some lame-sounding announcement for a Bingo Club meeting. They’d talk about how fun the club was. And how they liked to play other games too, like Uno and Connect Four and Pictionary and Risk. Then, basically, the whole school would laugh at them. But what a lot of people didn’t know was that the Bingo Club announcements were actually weird-boy code for “we’re throwing a huge off-campus party this weekend.”

Well, usually these parties were held at day students’ houses, but on one occasion, the Bingo Club decided to throw a “camping” party. “Bring tents!” the boys said. “There’ll be a keg!” “Tents?” we wondered. “Camping?” This seemed odd since the school was located in the Boston suburbs, but the boys assured everyone they’d “found the perfect spot.”
So, here’s the shameful part: In order to go to the party, my friends and I told our dorm parent that we were staying at a local girl’s house. We had the girl’s mom call in and give us permission to sign out of the dorms overnight. Then later, we called her mom back and said we weren’t coming over after all. Since we’d already been signed out, this gave us the freedom to…stay out all night at the party. But alas, everything went horribly awry. The “perfect camping spot” turned out to be “private property,” and the cops showed up at the party in record time. We were hauled in and handed over to the school for discipline. And because the school had a serious honor code, my friends and I got in trouble, not for being at the party, but for lying to get out of the dorms. That lie earned me a (well-deserved) weeklong suspension!
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Thanks for amusing us the heck out of us with your bad girl ways, Stephanie.

So...which is your favorite boarding school book?

1. Prep
2. Catcher in the Rye
3. Looking for Alaska
4. Harry Potter
5. Jane Eyre
6. Paper Covers Rock
7. Dreams of Significant Girls
8. A Separate Peace
9. Jellicoe Road
10. The Bruno and Boots series

Or movie?
1. Halloween H20*
2. Rushmore
3. The Covenant*
4. School Ties
5. Scent of a Woman
6. X-Men
7. Dead Poet's Society
8. She's the Man*
9. The Emperor's Club
10. Cracks**

*Did you pick one of these? Awesome. Please defend it in the comments.
**Which boarding school books/movies did I miss?

Next up: Natalie Whipple. Send her truth and dares here. If you are a published (or soon to be published) author, sign up to guest post with us.

Mindy McGinnis Takes the Dare

2012-05-04T02:00:00.000-04:00

We've probably all worn clothes our mom didn't care for at one point in time. My mom and I had an ongoing prom dress feud during my high school career, so when I spotted this dare from Larissa Hardesty I knew it was time to relive the past:

Find and post and old video of yourself from high school. Or make a video montage of old pictures of yourself from high school - bonus points for embarrassing pics :P

And what better way to relive the embarrassing pictures of the past than to create an embarrassing vlog in the present? I call it, "Garment Disagreements with Mother."

Thanks for playing, Larissa! For your prize I'll send you a copy of Spring Fevers, an anthology of short stories that I contributed to.

If you've got a Truth or Dare for the lovely Thirteeners, let us know by hitting up the Truth or Dare page!
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Mindy McGinnis is a YA librarian and writer repped by Adriann Ranta of Wolf Literary. Her debut YA novel, NOT A DROP TO DRINK will be available from Katherine Tegen/ Harper Collins, Fall 2013. Mindy blogs at Writer, Writer Pants on Fire, and serves as a moderator on the writing forum AgentQuery Connect. She also contributes to the group blogs From the Write Angle and The Lucky 13s.

Alexandra Duncan Takes the Dare + Short Story Winners

2012-05-01T10:00:00.000-04:00

I promise to get around to embarrassing myself in a minute, but first, some important business: the winners of our short story contest. (Drumroll, please!)

The grand prize goes to. . . Leigh!

And our runners-up are. . . Silverpool and Christina.

Congratulations, guys! Thank you so much for playing. E-mail us at fridaythethirteeners[at]gmail[dot]com to claim your prizes.

And now, on to the humiliation. . .

The last time I played Truth or Dare was at my friend Nicole's birthday party during my senior year of high school. Most of our truths involved boys, and I don't think there was a single dare in the mix. What had happened to the halcyon days of mixing together weird things from the fridge and then making each other eat them? Or sneaking out of the house to jump on the trampoline at midnight? So, when I heard about the idea of the Thirteeners, I knew immediately I had to play, and I knew I wanted to start with a really good dare.

Amy Conroy sent in a perfect one:

Read a bit of a story from when you were younger (child to teenager, the youngest piece that you can find).

I'm not sure about the wisdom of letting my 11 year-old self's writing out into the world when I'm trying to have a career convincing people to read the things I write now, but it wouldn't be a dare if it didn't hurt a little, right?

Thanks for the awesome dare, Amy. Since this is my first time playing, you get to choose a prize - a $13 gift certificate or a copy of Booklife, by Jeff Vandermeer (my favorite guide to the writing life). E-mail me at fridaythethirteeners[at]gmail[dot]come and let me know which you'd like.

Thanks again for playing! Check back with us this coming Friday, May 4th, for a post by the lovely and talented Mindy McGinnis.
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Alexandra Duncan is a writer and librarian. Her first novel, Salvage, is due to be released by Greenwillow Books/Harper Collins in Fall 2013. You can find her online at Twitter, Goodreads, and her personal blog.

Megan Shepherd Takes the Truth

2012-04-27T06:00:00.000-04:00

Hello! I am excited to be back and tackling another entry for the blog. This week I chose a truth from Joan Stradling that has been a question I’ve been getting more and more recently:

Tell us at least one thing you added to a character in your upcoming work that is based on your personality (or that of someone you know).

This truth made me think of a lunch recently I was having with a writing friend who claimed that in one way or another, all novels are autobiographical. I had a hard time agreeing with her, so I tried to draw any parallels in my own work. I mean, here’s the gist of my book:

16-year-old girl travels to her estranged father's island and finds murder, madness, and a love triangle with an enigmatic castaway and her father's handsome young assistant.

Here’s the gist of my life right now:

29-year-old writer travels to the kitchen for another cup of tea and finds hungry cats, dirty dishes, and a husband with an enigmatic desire for Spam.

If The Madman’s Daughter really were autobiographical in even the vaguest sense, I’d probably be locked away in an institution somewhere. I’ve never been involved in dark scientific experimentation (OK, I did participate in some psych studies in college, but that was just to earn money for beer). In real life, my dad is the most zen, calm, sane person I know. I mean, he’s a bookseller. The craziest scientific experimentation he would do is to move a book from sci-fi to mainstream fiction and see if anyone notices.

But here’s the thing. Even though the facts of The Madman’s Daughter are entirely fiction, many of the emotions and themes are borrowed from my life. I know what it feels like to be walking alone at night and feel afraid you’re being followed. I know what falling in love feels like. I know what disappointment, anger, and hope feel like, too. And those aspects of the book are absolutely taken from the emotional impact of real experiences I had.

And there are some fun smaller details taken from my daily life. A dog in The Madman’s Daughter sequel is modeled after my neighbor’s dog. I haven’t told them that yet, which I should, because they’re probably wondering why I keep staring at their dog and then taking notes. I am using a friend’s last name for a particularly devious villain, but luckily she took that as a compliment. And one of my favorite lines in the book, which shall remain a mystery for now, is something my husband often says.

Thanks for submitting such a great truth, Joan!

Alexandra Duncan will be doing the next Truth or Dare on Tuesday, May 1. Be sure to leave a question for Alexandra on the Truth/Dare page, because it’s her first one!

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Megan Shepherd is a young adult writer living in the Blue Ridge Mountains of North Carolina. Her debut novel, The Madman's Daughter, comes out in early 2013 from Balzer+Bray/HarperCollins, and is the first in a Gothic thriller trilogy. She’d love to hear from you at her blog, Twitter, Facebook, or on Goodreads.

Introducing our Fourth Mystery Author!

2012-04-24T06:00:00.000-04:00

Ahem, drumroll please...

We Friday the Thirteeners are very very very excited to introduce our fourth Mystery Author:

Alexandra Duncan

Alexandra is a librarian by day and writer by night. Her debut novel, SALVAGE, is coming in 2013 from Greenwillow/HarperCollins.

SALVAGE is young adult science fiction with a feminist slant. Ava, sixteen, has spent her whole life aboard the ship Parastrata, where polygamy, hard labor, and illiteracy are the norm. When she receives the news that she is to be married, she holds out hope that her childhood friend, Luck, will be her future husband. But what starts as an innocent mistake causes Ava’s people to turn against her, and she must run for her life. She barely escapes to Earth, where she finds refuge in a floating city of trash and debris. India has become the heart of this future world, yet life beyond the country’s borders and on its social fringes is rife with violence and danger. Can Ava find a way to survive outside the insular world of her youth? Will she ever see Luck again? And is what she has been told about her own past the whole truth?

Sounds so cool! We're sure you can't wait to read it, just like us. You can also connect to Alexandra on her blog or Twitter.

Alexandra will be tackling her first Truth or Dare on Tuesday, May 1. We know you are dying to get to know Alexandra, and there's no better way than a little soul-searching public humiliation. So leave Alexandra a special truth or dare on our Truth or Dare page.

Kasie West Takes the Truth

2012-04-20T06:00:00.009-04:00

In case you haven’t learned this about me yet: I love to laugh. I often tell people that I married my husband because he made me laugh more often than anyone else ever had. He still does. So when I read the truth by Martha Flynn and laughed out loud, I knew I had to answer it. The question is:

If you were stuck in the woods at a camp (and you’ve been making out with boys, naughty you) and some hockey-faced wearing freak started terrorizing you with a chainsaw…which Friday the Thirteener would you trip so you could make a clean getaway?

This is a very good question. And although I laughed while reading it, I take my answer very seriously. Chainsaw-wielding masked freaks are a scary possibility and should be planned for accordingly.

So who would I sacrifice to save my own life? I better analyze this.

Shannon has huge brains. Come on, the girl is putting out two books in a year (a middle grade AND a young adult), she has a lot going on up there. Erin is also big in the brain department. I mean, most of the cool stuff on this blog is her doing. Smart girl. So either one of them might be able to think up a way to get away from a masked man should I trip them. And if they can’t, let’s face it, their big brains will take longer for the chainsaw to get through thus giving me more time to run away.

Ellen could probably beat the crap out of the masked man. I’ve heard she’s had several practice fights to prepare. So I might pick her because she might actually survive if I tripped her.

Natalie on the other hand has this one stare that can be quite unnerving. She might be able to stare him down. And if that doesn’t work, I hear she’s a ninja. But she is pregnant right now, so that might make me feel really guilty. I don't like to feel guilty.

Megan wrote a book about a madman’s daughter. That in and of itself should qualify her to deal with all sorts of madmen. Plus she got to be on the set of The Hunger Games so she should be able to….wait there were no chainsaws in The Hunger Games, but still, it should give her some sort of survival skills. She probably pushed a few people over to get to Liam Hemsworth (I know I would).

Is the masked guy Liam Hemsworth by any chance? Because if that’s the case I might be willing to sacrifice myself for the greater good.

Elsie is this tiny little thing so even though I hear she can hold her own in a fight, if worse came to worse, she wouldn’t be able to keep the chainsaw occupied long enough for me to get away. But she does have kids so she’s probably really good at getting a crazy person to do what she wants him to do.

April is hilarious (sometimes in a wildly inappropriate way). She might be able to tell some jokes and keep the guy entertained. But after one of my friends is hacked, I’ll probably need her to tell a few jokes about it to get my mind off of the horror.

Mindy is also super funny, but her jokes are very dry so mask-guy might not know she’s kidding. This might anger him further. But, she is involved with a million blogs. So maybe chainsaw freak would be struck dumb by her star status.

So my answer? Why not trip all of them? That's my best chance. It’s all about survival, right? Love you, girls.

Thanks for the fun question, Martha!

Up next Friday: Megan Shepherd. Don't forget to leave her some truths or dares here.

And tune in this coming Tuesday when our next mystery author will be revealed!!

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Kasie West writes YA paranormal. She graduated from Fresno State University with a BA degree that has nothing to do with writing. She earned her masters in Junior Mint eating (which is awarded after eating your millionth King Size box....and is now working on her PhD). She loves sappy alternative rock ballads and reading way past her bedtime.

Her debut novel PIVOT POINT will be out with HarperTeen in the Winter of 2013

Sara Walsh Takes The Truth AND The Dare

2012-04-17T06:00:00.006-04:00

This week April Tucholke dared Sara Walsh, author of The Dark Light (out Aug. 28, 2012), to serve herself afternoon tea in a public place--but Sara went and upped the game by also taking Elodie's truth: What book did you secretly read and enjoy? Here we go:

Sara Walsh is an expat Brit and author of The Dark Light, a YA fantasy that debuts August 28, 2012, from Simon Pulse/Simon & Schuster. When not writing (rarely), Sara is usually reading, drowning in tea, or frolicking around town with the world's cutest St. Bernard. You can follow Sara on Twitter @saraleighwalsh.

The Dark Light is available for pre-order here and here, or you can add it to your shelves at Goodreads.

Next up: Kasie West. Send her truths and dares. If you are a published (or soon to be published) author, sign up to guest post with us.

Happy Friday the 13th!

2012-04-13T05:00:00.005-04:00

Hooray! It's the second Friday the 13th of 2012 and we plan to celebrate with prizes (for you) and short stories (written by us)! Remember a few weeks ago when we asked you guys to vote on a genre to get us started? Well the results came in and the winner was...

Fantasy!

So us Thirteeners each wrote three sentences of the following fantasy tale before passing it along to another member of the group. Without further ado, we give you...

Game of Rouge

After Breaking Into Song for the fifth time that night (o ‘twas full of dwells, plodding journeys, and much exclamation, to be sure!), Allandra chugged down the last of her EarthBalance Beer. She belched loudly behind her bell sleeve and shoved her royal fascinator back onto the top of her head.
Over the boisterous noise of the Arcs still yodeling away in the castle’s Pit Pub, Allandra suddenly heard the sound of footsteps rushing up behind her, and she fumbled for her Bedazzled Sword amongst the pink froth of her gown.

“Since when do you wear dresses?” Gilead, her fellow assassin and therefore competition, asked, unfazed by the knife she’d placed at his throat.

“Do not blow my cover. Or I shall add you to my hit list tonight,” she replied.

Gilead smiled and quirked one of his red eyebrows at her. “Which one?”

“Please. I’d have to be drinking Earth UNBalance Beer to even consider it,” Allandra said, breaking the bottle over his head to prove her point.

Just then a group of assassin cheerleaders twirled into the Pit Pub and formed a 19 person pyramid and then somersaulted their way into a murderous spree with razor embedded pom poms. Not to be upstaged by the viciously perky cheerleaders, the ballerina posse released their switchblade tutus and pirouetted their way toward the cheerleaders, slicing innocent bystanders to shreds. One very resourceful male ballerina pulled from his tights a long chained meteor hammer that had two large over-sized iron balls at each end of the chain, disappointing a number of his starry-eyed fans.

Allandra eyed Gilead’s unconscious form on the floor, thinking perhaps she should have let his debauchery go unpunished just this once because he might’ve been useful against the well-known and very much feared Bad Theater Brigade. If she was rounded up with the other Pub patrons and couldn’t watch the official show from the mezzanine, her mission would be thwarted, the stupid dress she wore useless. How would she kill the lead actor and save the world from Bad Theater?

Clearly, she had to revive Gilead. Allandra twirled an antique ring on her finger, summoning Rouge, an ill-tempered old barn cat with the uncanny ability to both wake and sedate humans at the sound of his mew.

“You’ve pulled me away from a delectable saucer of warm milk, so this better be important,” said the cat, his orange tail flicking with irritation as he appeared.

Allandra pointed to Gilead’s prone form and Rouge rolled his yellow eyes and uttered a disdainful, “Mew.”

“Honestly,” the cat hissed as Gilead groaned toward consciousness, “you’re surrounded by cheerleader assassins and ninja ballerinas, and instead of asking me to sedate them, you ask me to revive the half wit?”

Gilead pulled himself to his feet, hooking his arm through Allandra’s as he said, “That’s because she has a thing for me—and because I’m the only one who knows the password.”

Allandra slid her knife up Gilead's torso and stopped again at his throat--she needed that password to get past the Shadow Guards at the House of the Seven Sins, and he knew it.

“A password for a kiss,” Gilead said, tossing his red hair and grinning, “for that is the going rate and I'll take no less.”

“I'd rather die,” Allandra whispered, bringing her lips to his while sinking her blade into...
...the rough wooden wall behind him, a hair’s breath between his legs.

With a gulp, because he didn’t doubt her threat to rob him of the chance to have little red-headed assassin babies one day, Gilead mumbled, “Sassafras.”

“Mew!” Rouge the cat cried magically, and as Gilead, Allandra, the ninja ballerinas, and cheerleader assassins all slumped to the ground unconscious, the cat trotted over and picked up Allandra’s ring with a triumphant smirk and said, “What a stupid girl, except for her exceptional taste in puffy sleeves…and now, with the secret password and the sacred ring, so begins the dawning of the long-prophesied Age of Calico, hiss hiss!”

THE END…?

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So? What do you think? We had far too much fun writing this sucker! (And we must admit -- For an exquisite corpse writing exercise, it came out better than we expected.)

And now, to celebrate this (un)lucky day, we're hosting a giveaway.

Sections of the story are highlighted above in distinct colors. Correctly guess which Thirteener wrote each passage, and you'll be entered into a drawing to win the grand prize listed below!

Here are some clues to help you sort things out:

Red Thirteener's book features doppelgangers.
Dark Blue Thirteener's book features mutants, Taco Bell burrito-eating contests, running from problems, and vintage eyeglasses.
Gold Thirteener's book features water, target practice, and peeps being kick-ass.
Green Thirteener's book features smelly demons, a kick-ass girl warrior, waterfalls, and mountains.
Light Blue Thirteener's book features mind powers, alternate futures, and cute boys.
Purple Thirteener's book features brothers, a wall, secrets, and crows.

Pink Thirteener's book features a snarky boy, a sweltering desert, and one amazingly delicious In-N-Out Cheeseburger.
Teal Thirteener's book features cemeteries, a rotting mansion, a stranger, a knife, a glow.
Gray Thirteener's book features corsets, dramatically smashing wine glasses in fireplaces, and "manimals."

Not sure you can guess correctly? No worries. We're randomly selecting two winners from the comments (regardless of guessing accuracy) to win the runner-up prize! And if no one guesses correctly, we'll hand-select a grand-prize winner from the commenter who comes closest!

Entering is easy: make sure you are a follower of our blog (click "join this site" over in the sidebar) and leave your Color/Thirteener guesses in the comments. That's it!

Grand Prize (1 winner)

$13 gift card to Amazon or B&N (your choice)

+
3 of our favorite YA novels

Runner-Up Prize (2 winners)

$13 gift card to Amazon or B&N (your choice)

Giveaway is open now through midnight (EST) on Friday, April 20th. Please note: the books for the grand prize winner will ship to US ADDRESSES ONLY.

That's all for now, folks. May you day be free of black cats, broken mirrors, and ladders under which you accidentally pass. We'll see you again next week!

Emma Pass Takes the Dare

2012-04-10T06:00:00.008-04:00

As anyone who follows me on Twitter knows, I am the minion to proud owner of an ex-racing greyhound, AKA The Hound, who takes his retirement very seriously. So when the Thirteeners’ very own April Tucholke dared me to draw a comic strip about him, I couldn’t resist. Without further ado, I present to you… a guide to building your very own Hound!

If you’re interested in having a Hound of your own, why not check out the greyhound projec t. (If you’re in the UK, check out the Retired Greyhounds Trust. Or, if you happen to live in Oregon, by chance, go to Homes for Hounds.)

Emma Pass grew up at an environmental studies centre near London, went to art school in Cornwall and now lives in the North-East Midlands with her artist husband, where she has a day job at her local library. She is represented by Carolyn Whitaker at London Independent Books and her YA dystopian thriller ACID is out from Random House Children's Books in early 2013. You can find her blog here, and catch her procrastinating on Twitter here. She also blogs over at The Lucky 13s.

Next up: Us. We're doing a special Friday the 13th thing on April 13th. There will be cool prizes.

Erin Bowman Takes the Truth

2012-04-06T05:00:00.001-04:00

It's that time again -- truth or dare time! Elodie had asked: Who is your secret crush from YA lit? Well, Elodie, you may have gotten more than you bargained for because I have far more than one. I'll let the vlog take it from here:

Huge props to Elodie for such a great question! As a thank you, I'm giving you a $13 amazon or B&N giftcard (your choice) so that you can buy one of these novels and fall in love with the characters just like I did! Just email me via our Thirteeners account -- fridaythethirteeners[at]gmail[dot]com -- so I know where to send your prize.

And to everyone else: Perhaps you would like to submit some more truth and dares for us? In the video I said we'd answer one next week, but I actually lied. It will be TWO weeks before you see another truth and dare because next week is Friday the 13th! We have a special post planned (complete with giveaway items!) so be sure to check back!

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Erin Bowman is a YA writer, letterpress lover, and Harry Potter enthusiast living in New Hampshire. Her debut novel, TAKEN, comes out from HarperTeen in Winter of 2013. You can visit her blog (updated occasionally) or find her on twitter (updated obsessively).

Elsie Chapman Takes the Truth

2012-03-30T06:00:00.002-04:00

My first vlog, folks. Not just for Friday the Thirteeners, but ever ever. Please be kind.

So a couple of weeks ago I was in NYC for spring break. After I got to meet my amazing editor and agent, it just seemed like the perfect time to tackle a couple of truths about the writing process. And then vlog about it. (I'm sure there's a connection between the two...somewhere.)

Also, you know what they say about how everyone hates the sound of their own voice? I realized that THIS IS TRUE. SO, SO TRUE. I also swear I'm not nearly so valley-girl-sounding in real life.

Still, I hope you enjoy!

Okay, now that you're done laughing at me, got any burning truths or dares you'd like to submit? Do so here. And come back next Friday, April 6th, when the fabulous Erin Bowman takes her turn at Truth or Dare!

Mindy McGinnis Takes The Truth

2012-03-27T06:00:00.008-04:00

We are so excited to welcome Mindy McGinnis for Truth or Dare this week! Mindy's debut YA novel, NOT A DROP TO DRINK, will be published by Katherine Tegen/Harper Collins, Fall 2013. In the meantime, she's going to tackle a Truth as submitted by Friday the Thirteeners blog reader, Rena:

Q: What was the stupidest thing you did as a teenager that you realized (as a teenager) that it was so bone headed that it makes you blush with shame now?

I grew up in a very rural area. And by rural I mean that we define the term “neighbor” as someone whose house you can see from your own when you’re standing on the roof. Entertainment was far away, and so my older sister and I came up with very original, and possibly lethal, ways to pass the time.

We look at each other now, and while we don’t necessarily blush with shame, we do ask each other, “How did we survive our teens?”

It’s a decent question.

Bone-Headed Self-Entertainment Instance #1:

Grain silos are fun places to play. Um, if this were a True or False question on a parenting quiz, you need to mark False. Yes, parents know better. But do teens? Not usually. You may not be aware of this, but silos have an internal ladder and side access doors that you can open when they’re not full of grain. Opening side doors of partially full bins, then climbing the internal ladder and jumping down into the grain was fruit for dares to see who could climb higher, and subsequently sink the lowest into the grain upon impact. It was a favorite past time of mine until I saw the scene in Witness where Harrison Ford kills one of his pursuers by suffocating him in a grain silo.

Bone-Headed Self-Entertainment Instance #2:

Rushing streams should be viewed as a free waterpark ride. Again, this is patently false to discerning observers, but bored teens aren’t exactly in that category. Scurrying along fallen trees and then clutching onto limbs flailing wildly in the rushing current was a heck of an adrenaline rush, and also an invitation to a quick drowning. Luckily, fate either appreciated our balls or wasn’t paying attention.

Bone-Headed Self-Entertainment Instance #3:

Haymows and swinging ropes were made for each other. At first glance, this doesn’t seem so bad, right? I knew plenty of people with ropes in the mow for a good swingin’ time. Well, the rope we used was a good eight feet from the edge of the hayloft and at the moment we were using it, there was no hay truck (or really anything) in between our skulls and the concrete floor. I can’t remember how many times I made the running leap, but I can remember exactly the words that were used by our father when we were discovered. It was quite the education.

Continued Issues with Bone-Headedness:

I did manage to break my tailbone at one point in a hayloft related incident. I wasn’t paying attention as I scooted backward from a raccoon I’d accidentally surprised. Luckily I was in the small barn and it was only about a five-foot drop to a wooden floor. I got to relive the pain two years ago when I rebroke my tailbone as a passenger on boat that was on land, and not moving. I can attest that while tailbone breakage hurts (like, really effing hurts) no matter how you broke it, there is a certain pang to your dignity that comes along with admitting that you did it while disembarking from a parked boat.

Thanks so much for playing Truth or Dare with us, Mindy, and we can't wait to get our hands on NOT A DROP TO DRINK!

Mindy McGinnis is a YA librarian and writer repped by Adriann Ranta of Wolf Literary. Her debut YA novel, NOT A DROP TO DRINK will be available from Katherine Tegen/ Harper Collins, Fall 2013. Mindy blogs at Writer, Writer Pants on Fire, and serves as a moderator on the writing forum AgentQuery Connect. She also contributes to the group blogs From the Write Angle and The Lucky 13s.

Come back this Friday, March 27th, because our very own Elsie Chapman is up. Feel like submitting a Truth or Dare for her?

In which Ellen embarrasses herself for April's amusement...

2012-03-23T08:00:00.020-04:00

Two weeks ago, April double dared me to come clean about my Brooklyn fight story. The funny thing is that it isn't as much about me fighting in Brooklyn (which I did a lot of) but about how my husband came to nickname me The Brooklyn Girl.

Just so you know, I fought a lot growing up. I mean face scratching, punching, kicking, slapping, rip the clothes off your back fighting. (I never pulled hair but had an insane amount of my hair pulled out in various fights.) But none of them is anywhere near as embarrassing as what I'm about to share with you.

So back when I was dating Da Man, who would later become Da husband, we went out with a bunch of friends to a bar/nightclub. Da Man took his usual position by the bar while my girlfriends and I took to the dance floor. As I was dancing, a man walked by and grabbed my arm and copped a cheap feel of my left breast. Now I'm not what you call a particularly well endowed type of girl. And I'm pretty sure my left side is actually smaller than my right. So it isn't that easy to accidentally feel me up. If a guy wants to cop a feel, there needs to be some intent, if you know what I mean. So the raging feminist in me lost her mind and in crazy, self-righteous anger, began to punch the guy as hard as she could, and as many times as she could, knocking him down, and making him let go of her. Da Man reckons I hit that guy at least 10 times before he hit the ground.

Raging Feminist - 100 "you go girl" points vs Nasty Sexual Molester - 0

Ok so here's the other side of the story. Guy is at a bar and gets rip roaring drunk and accidentally staggers on to the dance floor, trips and grabs at a nearby girl's arm in order to steady himself. The girl is actually insane and turns on said drunken fool and begins to punch him senseless, even as he is falling to the ground. His poor friends come running over to his defense shouting "Stop! He was just falling! Please stop! He was just falling!"

Insane Girl - 0 vs Drunken Fool - 1000 sympathy points

To this day, I don't think I've ever seen so many frightened men with gaping jaws staring at me. If my head had spun around and I had spewed green vomit, I don't think they would have been half as scared of me. And I'm pretty sure the only person laughing was Da Man. I distinctly remember him telling the drunken fool's friends not to mind me as I was from Brooklyn. To which one responded, "let's get the hell away from The Brooklyn Girl." And that's how I got my nickname.

Now that I've thoroughly embarrassed myself, I leave the floor to our newest member, Mindy McGinnis who will be posting her inaugural truth or dare on Tuesday, March 27th! Until then, hope you all have a wonderful, non-violent weekend!

Introducing our Third Mystery Author!

2012-03-20T06:00:00.000-04:00

Ahem, drumroll please...

We Friday the Thirteeners are very, very, excited to introduce our third Mystery Author:

Mindy McGinnis

Mindy's making her YA debut with her novel NOT A DROP TO DRINK. To be published Fall 2013 from Katherine Tegen/Harper Collins, here's a teaser:

NOT A DROP TO DRINK, the story of a teenage girl surviving in a rural America where an ounce of fresh water is worth more than gold and death wanders the countryside as thirst, cholera, and the guns of strangers; when her mother dies in an accident, the girl must decide between defending her pond alone or banding together with a crippled neighbor, a pregnant woman, a filthy orphan, and a teenage boy who awakens feelings she doesn’t understand.

Not only does NOT A DROP TO DRINK sound fabulous, but Mindy's pretty awesome herself, and we are more than ecstatic to have her join us! But her hazing just wouldn't be complete without a Truth or Dare, so make sure to submit one for her here. She'll be answering a week from today, March 27th, so make sure to check back to see how she does.

In the meantime, please join us in giving a huge welcome to Mindy, our newest Friday the Thirteener!

Shannon Messenger Takes The Truth

2012-03-16T06:00:00.005-04:00

Looks like I'm up this week--and I left things up to random chance again and ended up with a "truth" from Alyssa. Hope you enjoy!

Got any burning questions you're dying to ask us? Or maybe you have some terrifying dares you want to torture us with. Feel free to submit as many as you want by going HERE. And come back next week to see Ellen Oh take on a truth or dare.

Also... Don't forget to tune in next Tuesday when our next mystery author will be announced...

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It's Almost Friday the 13th!

2012-03-15T06:00:00.001-04:00

That's right, folks! The second Friday the 13th of 2012 is fast approaching -- less than a month, to be exact -- and we've got a special post planned to celebrate the occasion

In addition to hosting a giveaway, we plan on writing a little something for you, our readers. (Think short story done exquisite corpse-style.) We're really pumped to write this guy, and excited to see how all our different styles will come together, but first, we need to decide on a genre! So help us out, won't you?

Be sure to check back on Friday, April 13th for the finished story! In the meantime, you can always leave us some more Truth or Dare options. Shannon will be answering one tomorrow!

Kelly Barson Takes The Truth

2012-03-13T06:00:00.003-04:00

The fabulous Kelly Barson is our guest author for Truth or Dare this week! Her debut YA novel, 45 POUNDS, will be published by Viking Children's Books, Summer 2013.

A brief teaser: 45 Pounds is about a sixteen-year-old girl, Ann, who doesn’t fit—not into her blended family and certainly not into Snapz! clothes. She’s certain that if she could lose 45 pounds before her aunt’s wedding, her life would be perfectly normal. She finds out, though, that there is nothing perfect about normal.

Sounds pretty amazing, right? In the meantime, Kelly's chosen a truth submitted by blog reader Alyssa: What is your most embarrassing memory?

In my novel, 45 POUNDS, the main character, Ann, suffers many embarrassments. Unfortunately, those moments weren’t hard for me to write because I have a plethora of my own memories to draw from. The hard part is choosing just one! Since several of Ann’s embarrassing moments involve clothes, I thought I’d choose a fashion-related memory.

Around Halloween a few years ago, I wrote a last-minute skit for my church. Since I wrote it on Thursday to be performed on Sunday, there was no time to find a real cast; my daughter and I would have to do. There was also no time to find a fairy godmother costume. Again last minute—Sunday morning—I improvised. I yanked an old bridesmaid dress from the back of my closet: a poufy floral number, circa 1989. Thrilled that it fit, I was all set. But wait! The Velcro crisscross straps in the back kept coming free and flapping every time I moved.

My husband suggested safety pins. What? I wasn’t sure if we had any. Besides, I was in a hurry. Like a fashion designer pulling a scarf off one runway model and draping it on another to save the day, I would just take some scissors and remove the problem. They were just late 80s extraneous details, weren’t they? It’s not like I needed those straps. I was more than, um, ample enough to hold up the dress. Snip. Voila! Fairy godmother costume complete!

No time for rehearsal, my daughter and I entered stage right on cue. The church had an excellent turn-out that morning, as if they knew this was my acting debut. I did my part. I folded laundry as I “argued” with my daughter. I bent to pluck a towel from the basket. The dressed slipped down my right shoulder. I shrugged it back to place. With a washcloth, the left slipped. I shrugged again. Then the “doorbell” rang. As I stood, the V-neck widened and inched down my shoulders. I adjusted as I answered the door, exaggerating the motion, like it was scripted. I had this under control.

The final thirty seconds, which felt like half an hour, involved my daughter and me dancing and was supposed to be funny. Knowing how precarious my dress was, I was reserved, despite the instructions to be animated to increase the laugh. It didn’t matter. When I moved right, my dress slipped left. When I moved left, the dress slipped right. I tried to use my dancing as a vehicle for recovery, but it—along with mean old Mr. Gravity—only made it worse. But, even then, I refused to believe what was happening. I kept dancing, convinced no one knew but me.

Then I saw the church secretary’s eyes widen. Her husband, one of the elders, looked away. Scanning the congregation, it was obvious that my problem was visible beyond the front row. And not a single laugh. Then it hit me: I had not only debuted as an actress, but also as a stripper. And in church no less. After I slithered into the pew next to my husband, he whispered, “You might want to change, like, now.”

No one has asked (or should I say allowed?) me on stage since then, which suits me just fine. I’ll stick to writing. At least then the embarrassing moments aren’t my own. Except, of course, when I voluntarily expose my mortifying secrets to the world-wide blogosphere.

Kelly Barson graduated from Vermont College of Fine Arts with an MFA in Writing for Children and Young Adults, and is represented by Sara Crowe of Harvey Klinger, Inc. She lives in Jackson, Michigan, where she embarrasses herself publicly more than she cares to admit. You can find Kelly at www.kabarson.com, on Twitter: @kabarson, or on Facebook at www.facebook.com/pages/KA-Barson/256820997724421

Thanks so much for playing, Kelly! Come back this Friday, March 16th, to see our own awesome Shannon Messenger talk Truth or Dare. You can still submit one here!

April Tucholke Takes The Truth

2012-03-09T06:00:00.071-05:00

Mikael Riikonen from Stockholm, Sweden truthed me this: Have you ever been in a fight?

Yes, Mikael. I have been in a fight. I have totally been in a fight.

Time: Summer, a few days after my junior year of high school.
Setting: an open field in the middle of nowhere.
The event: The M****** senior party. Note: I did not go to M****** High School. I went to the K-12 farm school a half hour away.
The story:

My tan cousin Rob had come up from California for a few weeks and he was driving my grandma's car because she didn't use it anymore anyway. My older brother was passed out in the back seat. He wasn't drunk, just asleep. We'd heard rumors of the M****** senior party but we only had a vague idea where the hell it was. My cousin finally stopped the car on a pitch black gravel road. We got out, and listened. Yep. Music. Laughter. Straight north.

The party was scattered, and murky--what you'd expect a party in a field at night to be. A few people had turned on their car headlights, and thin, yellow beams bled through the dark. It made everything feel creepy and a little sad, like hanging out under a streetlamp at three in the morning on the worst street in town. Kids drank from red plastic cups, tripped over clumps of dirt, and tried to look like they were having fun. I stuck to my cousin's side because I didn't really know anyone, and my brother (who did) was still asleep back in the car. Some drunk guy felt me up from behind, and, as Rob and I shoved him off, I began to wonder why I'd thought crashing this party had been a good idea...

...and then I felt fingers claw into my hair, grab it at the base, and pull. I was yanked so hard I hit the ground and got a mouthful of dirt. I turned over but I couldn't see what was going on because my long yellow hair was in my face--until I realized that the blond hair blocking my sight wasn't my own. It belonged to the girl on top of me. I'll call her T. So I was rolling on the ground, T pulling my hair so hard my eyes were watering, and in the blur I saw that kids had started gathering around to watch us. I could hear Rob calling out to me, but I still couldn't see anything but yellow yellow yellow. I should have been screaming at this point, but all I did was say stupidly, over and over, Rob, please get her off of me, this is undignified. In the end I wasn't sure if it was T's fist or foot that hit my face, but my lip ripped open. Blood filled my mouth and started pouring down my chin and soaking into my hair. Rob finally threw T off and the crowd held her back so we could leave. Rob gave me his shirt and I sopped up some of the blood on the way to the car. The end.

Trivia:
Two of the Thirteeners were actual brawlers in high school, not accidental field fighters like me. Their code names are Brooklyn Girl and Four Posts Fighter. Any guesses who they are?

Poll:
A. Raise your hand if you've been in a fistfight.
B. Raise your hand if you think my fight would have been cooler if T and I had studied martial arts and had gone wuxia on each other instead of all that sissy hair pulling.
C. Yeah, turns out the handsy drunk guy was T's boyfriend, and had mistaken me for her, because of our mutual long blond hair. Which still doesn't remotely explain why I ended up in a catfight. (This isn't a question, just some btw info).
D. Fill in the blank: M******. If you can guess the name of my hometown, I'll give you $1000.*
E. True or False: T and I became friends after the fight. Sort of.
F. True or False: I made up this entire story. My parents are American, but I actually grew up in the tiny village of M******, Hautes-Alpes, France.
G. None of the above.
H. All of the above.
*Not really. But I'll be impressed. Impressed enough to send you a gift card or something.

Next up: the lovely Shannon Messenger. Send her truths and dares.

Kendare Blake Takes The Dare

2012-03-06T06:00:00.000-05:00

Kendare Blake is daring it up with us this week. She's the author of the brilliant, terrifying Anna Dressed In Blood, and its sequel Girl of Nightmares (out August 7, 2012). Kendare Blake digs travel, animals, Greek mythology, bloody meat, vegans, and writing books that scare the hell out of people. April Tucholke dared Kendare to start an urban legend, because, well, urban legends are awesome. Here we go:

For those who don’t know, a psychopomp is a portent of death, a spirit that foretells or announces when a person is about to or has recently passed. Family members of hospital patients recount stories of animals rapping against the hospital windows in the middle of the night. They turn to see yellow eyes or a flutter of wings, and when they turn back to the patient’s bed discover that they have died.

This psychopomp is different. As the story goes, this photo was taken on the same day the cat died. When the distraught owner posted the photo online, it prompted sympathy. Until the owner himself died, approximately two weeks later. Prior to his death, he told family members that he had seen the cat, outside in his garage. While that death cannot be attributed to the psychopomp cat, others have reported experiencing a strange sensation after looking into the cat’s glowing eyes. They say that after looking into its eyes for several minutes, a strange, panicked feeling takes hold, for no reason. Some say that they see the cat shift, or move, or its expression change. It should be noted that these responses are rare.

Though no harm or death can be attributed to this image, legend has it that if you stare into the eyes of the psychopomp cat, it will become your psychopomp, and will appear to you in the days preceding your death.

Okay, that's it. Thanks, Kendare! Let's make this baby happen. Stare into those glowing eyes, people, and spread the word. Who knows...maybe we will get this into snopes. Or, at the very least, give someone nightmares--which I hear is really good karma.

Next up: April Tucholke, this Friday, March 9.