Just what is it about these twin 18 year old boys from Ireland who cannot sing, cannot dance, look like the offspring of Tin-Tin and yet stand scarily poised to take out the title of winner in the X Factor…? and what is even more startling is the fact that Simon Cowell seems to be warming to them after weeks of piling criticism on them. I can tell you what it is: they have what is known as ‘It’ and let me tell you something - they have ‘It’ in abundance. Last night as they stood beside that lovely Welsh sweetheart, Lucie Jones, on stage who did YOU look at?…if most of you were being honest you would admit that you were looking at John and Edward. Lucie is gorgeous and she has an incredible voice but she lacks that gimmick that John and Edward have, even if that gimmick is being the ultimate in cheese they have a gimmick none the less and THAT is what makes them so darn watchable. THAT’S the X Factor guys.

You can agree or disagree but these two kids have more people talking about their non-talent than any of the other contestants have talking about their talent. The truth is there is no single quality that defines the ‘It’ element - and you don’t need talent to have it. Simon Cowell knows this only too well. Just as there are many people knocking these kids there are as many more who pick up the phone each week and vote to see them again. Just consider past winners; Leona Lewis - a good singer but, in my opinion, dead boring as an entertainer. Alexandra Burke - good singer but, once again, I’ve seen more sparks fly off a car battery. And no, I can’t sing better than them but I also would not open my purse to buy their cd’s because they don’t entertain me.

John and Edward, for some strange reason, do. They sing out of tune and rarely ensemble - they dance to their own beat and probably have the thickest skins I have ever seen on two performers…which they will need more than anything in this business. They have been criticised more than any other contestant on the show and still manage to smile each week where certain other singers take every tiny critical word and beat themselves with it. But what really appeals to me is their bursting enthusiasm for going all out on stage, they really do put everything (whatever it is…) into their act - they set out to entertain. I say good luck to them.

Dannii is a well seasoned performer with experience going back years before big sister Kylie ever grabbed a micrphone and sang Locomotion. Just look at the picture to the left; bottom left of the photo is Dannii when she was simply Dannielle or Danny - she altered the spelling of her name after she left YTT. Dannii started out as a child singing and dancing in an Australian variety show called Young Talent Time. It was on every Sunday night and also launched the career of Tina Arena. The kids on YTT were all talented although not all went on to worldwide fame - they had to leave YTT when they turned 15. You either loved YTT or you thought it was pure cheese (I thought the latter…) but it certainly gave the kids a platform for their talents. Dannii was on this show from the age of six which makes her a more experienced performer in showbusiness than her sister.

There are talks that Young Talent Time is making a return to Australian television which excites some people and scares the daylight out of others. Whatever it does to you it will join the reappearance of several Australian landmark tv shows, Hey Hey It’s Saturday being one of them.

Well I certainly and I have made a list of some of these very people who seem to be everywhere, with everyone and frankly…WHY!

Alexa Chung (left): I had to list this woman first because I cannot figure her out at all. Strange name, strange looking, and the most awkward posture I have ever seen - she always looks like she is busting to have a wee. Someone teach this person the art of leg-placement please!

The Geldof Sisters: You have to place these two - Peaches and Pixie (they sound like cabbage patch dolls…) - together because they appear to work as a double act. They don’t seem to work, get invited to everything, look totally miserable, annoy a lot of people and - oh yes - their father is ‘Saint Bob’ Geldof. Fame by association yes - but I wonder what will happen when they age and their perma-sad faces show some wear and tear…the media should be ashamed of it’s collective self for convincing these two that they mean anything to the population…

Any female housemate from Big Brother: Enough said - can anybody DO something about Michelle Bass…?

Kelly Osborne: Sorry, but I still cannot work her out. I like Ozzy for sure, but after all her stints in rehab…what else does she DO!

And…

Nicola McLean: Your guess is as good as mine. Googles herself obsessively (well, we all need a hobby - HI! ), has landed herself a footballer husband so is set for life financially - must have been the two silicone footballs inserted in her chest that he found attractive. Likes to stir Katie Price and emulate alter-ego Jordan but ain’t in the league.Wow - three lines written about her…is this a record for Nicol…Nicole…Nicoli…NICOLA! (phew, I knew I’d get it eventually)

Pointless celebrities, pointless people, pointless…like this article. Feel free to add some more…

Meet the Grewals. This a family, a very British family, in modern day Britain. They are Sikh’s and three generations of the family live under the one roof - whether or not we get more than brief glimpse of snatches of The Kumars remains to be seen, but I will be watching for sure What is more I hope that certain people who argue about who and what constitutes ‘British’ today tune in to the show.

Where it all started…

This concept is not new of course. Reality television featuring fly-on-the-wall coverage of everyday families began way back in 1978 with a documentary about the Wilkins family of Reading. But it was the eye-opening series filmed in 1992 at 48 Macintyre Crescent in the waterside suburb of Sylvania Waters in Sydney, Australia that heralded the new medium of reality television that we know today and what an introduction it was! it was narrated by 15 year old Micheal Baker, son of Noeline.

The ’stars’ were the Donaher and Baker families headed by Laurie Donaher and his formidable partner Noeline Baker. They were a couple living together in one of Sydney’s more affluent suburbs during the height of the Keating Labor Govt and the ‘recession we had to have’. The things which particularly stood out were the contrasts in lifestyles between the couple and their adult offspring - Laurie and Noeline living in luxury in a waterside home whilst Noeline’s son, Paul and his pregnant fiancee Dione, live in a rented weatherboard house in the not-so affluent Western Suburbs (Mortdale) of Sydney on a very basic wage, often unable to afford fuel for their car.

This series sparked intense debate among Australians who found themselves glued to the series - you either loved Noeline or you hated her but you could not ignore the fact that this family represented very well the lives of millions of Australians. It was like holding up a mirror to the masses…and many did not like what they saw. The overriding message though was it showed that in Australia there is a high quality of lifestyle available to anyone - it just takes a lot of hard work to get there, it is not just handed to you on a plate. No doubt the Grewals of Great Britain will demonstrate that in their own way as well.

After the series ended the family went on to mixed fortunes:

Micheal Baker (teenage son of Noeline) - at the age of 23 Micheal was involved in a hostage drama in 1999 when he was one of six tourists kidnapped by Rwandan rebels in Uganda. He was freed eventually unharmed.

Mick and Yvette (Laurie’s son and daughter-in-law) - remained happily married and several years after the series Yvette gave birth to a son, a brother for their two daughters.

Paul and Dione (Noeline’s ever-battling son and daughter-in-law) - sadly despite the birth of son Kane during the series, and their on-screen wedding, Paul and Dione’s marriage ended rather acrimoniously with Dione accusing Paul of domestic violence and fleeing to Queensland with their child.

Noeline and Laurie Donaher - The couple eventually married in Monaco but separated during the late 90’s. They have since reunited and are now living retired on the Gold Coast.

Noeline’s recording of ‘No Regrets’

But this whole Andre vs Price saga has become tiresome and neither should be using the media or their respective reality shows (and they both are) to score points against the other. They are both using various magazines to shoot down the other over the latest thing being said or done - Pete whines about her constantly in his show while moaning at the same time about ‘moving on’. He needs to know that the media will not let up about the breakup with Katie until he ends all the speculation by revealing his reason(s) why; we can all speculate - personally I suspect he and his side of Can Associates decided among themselves that he could do better without Katie, that he no longer wanted, or needed, to share the limelight with her (that being with her gave him…) and he wanted to be just ‘Peter Andre’ and not ‘Katie and Peter’. I also suspect something deeper regarding one issue that seemed to be a bone of contention between them when Katie did her recent interview with Piers Morgan - regarding the miscarriage - but that’s as far as I will go on that one, let’s wait and see. His show does make for cringeworthy stuff at times as his sycophantic entourage work overtime to constantly reassure Pete how wonderful he is, looks, sounds…

I remember that nasty row on TV between Peter and Katie in that shop in LA and I remember being surprised at the side of Pete that emerged during it. All I’m seeing lately is a very bitter Peter Andre starting to show a rather unpleasant side to himself - just as Katie has already shown hers - and I am wondering if he is at all aware of it…