Funny Jokes And Messages

Definition of A Kiss

noreply@blogger.com (Sirish) — Fri, 16 Dec 2011 09:41:17 PST

Prof .of Economics : Kiss is that thing for which the demand is always higher than the supply.

Prof .of Accountancy : Kiss is a credit because it is profitable when returned.

Prof .of Algebra : Kiss is infinity because two divide by nothing .

Prof .of Geometry : Kiss is the shortest distance between two lips .

Prof .of Physics : Kiss is the contraction of mouth due to the expansion of heart .

Prof .of Chemistry : Kiss is the reaction of the interaction between two hearts .

Prof .of Physiology : Kiss is a juxtaposition of two orbicular muscles in the state of contraction .

Prof.of dentistry : Kiss is infectious and antiseptic .

Prof.of philosophy : Kiss is the persecution for the child ,ecstasy for the young and homage for the old .

Prof.of computer science : what is a kiss ? it seems to be an undefined variable !

Prof .of English : Kiss is a noun that is used as a conjunction ,it is more common than proper ,it is spoken in the plural and it is applicable to all .

Prof.of architecture : Kiss is a process which builds a solid bond between the two dynamic objects.

Apology

noreply@blogger.com (Sirish) — Tue, 06 Dec 2011 04:59:32 PST

Apology doesn't mean that you were wrong,or other person was right.it means that your relationship is valuable than your ego

AllLaugh

noreply@blogger.com (Sirish) — Sun, 04 Dec 2011 03:23:13 PST

The human body is wondering who is the leader?!

The heart says :It's me I circulate the blood.

The brain says :No ,It's me because I control everything.

The Liver says : No, me ,because i feed.

And the Anus said : No It's me.

All laugh.

Then the anus refused to open for seven days.

The liver has exploded,the brain was stewed and heart stopped beating.

Moral :

Even an asshole can be a leader !

Goodnight sms

noreply@blogger.com (Sirish) — Fri, 02 Dec 2011 22:03:32 PST

i may not comment on everything you post

i may not always respond on time

i may seem like I'm not here

but if you get this then you must know you are very special to me

Good Night.

worth

noreply@blogger.com (Sirish) — Tue, 29 Nov 2011 08:46:52 PST

"i wont force myself to have space in your life...because if you really know my worth...you'll make one for me.." :-)

A friendless life is like a flowerless garden.But i have a beautiful garden with a wonderful flowers .One of my best flower is reading my sms.....good98.

classmates

noreply@blogger.com (Sirish) — Thu, 01 Sep 2011 03:50:26 PDT

C - caring

L -love

A - ad vicing

S - sharing

S - strong

M - matching

A - active

T - talented

E -eligible

S -students

"CLASSMATES"

competition

noreply@blogger.com (Sirish) — Sat, 04 Jun 2011 05:01:27 PDT

In a 100 meter race,

It was announced "1 2 3 start".

All started running except laurel.

Hardy : why are you still waiting?

Laurel: hu! I too know numbers. My no. is 4.

Hardy : ahh????

Bet

noreply@blogger.com (Sirish) — Fri, 03 Jun 2011 21:48:03 PDT

Laurel: I lost Rs 800 by betting on cricket match, 500 once and 300 again for same match.

Hardy: How?

Laurel: I bet 300 again for highlights.

Hardy : ahh?????

Wild Horse

noreply@blogger.com (Sirish) — Fri, 03 Jun 2011 21:48:03 PDT

Teacher : which is the oldest animal in the world?

student : “ZEBRA”

Teacher : shocked,how?

student : because its still “black and white”.

teacher : ahh??????

House of God

noreply@blogger.com (Sirish) — Fri, 03 Jun 2011 21:48:03 PDT

Person : Father ! can i smoke while praying..?

Church father : No..You must not..

Person : then, can i pray while smoking..?

Church father : ahh ????????

Not at any time

noreply@blogger.com (Sirish) — Fri, 03 Jun 2011 21:48:03 PDT

Never say "I love you"

If you don't really care

Never talk of feeling

If they aren't really there

Never Hold my hand

If you mean to break my heart

Never say Forever

If you ever plan to part

Never look into my eyes

If you are telling me a lie

Never say hello

If you think you'll say Good-bye

Never say I'm the One

If you dream of more then me

Never lock-up my heart

If you don't have the key!!!

Mathematics

noreply@blogger.com (Sirish) — Fri, 03 Jun 2011 21:48:03 PDT

Mathematics may not teach us how to love or how to minus hate..but..

it gives us every

reason to hope that every problem has a solution.....

G00D Night.

Gravel

noreply@blogger.com (Sirish) — Fri, 03 Jun 2011 21:48:03 PDT

1 stone is enough 2 break a glass

1 sentence is enough 2 break a heart

1 second is enough 2 fall in love N

1 SMS enough 2 Keep relations in touch ....

Ante meridiem

noreply@blogger.com (Sirish) — Tue, 06 Dec 2011 04:51:00 PST

Morning has a great meaning.In every morning SUN says “Wake up like me” Sky says “Aim my height” Wind says “Refresh like me” Have a great day .Good Morning.

Strong fondness

noreply@blogger.com (Sirish) — Tue, 06 Dec 2011 04:51:50 PST

“Affection is not measured when both take care of each other;

it is measured when one ignores and other still continues to care

Good morning.

Fling

noreply@blogger.com (Sirish) — Fri, 30 Dec 2011 09:48:36 PST

Old love story: starts from eyes Grows with Gifts ends with tears

Modern love story; Starts from mobile Grows with Recharges Ends with SIM change

charliechaplin

noreply@blogger.com (Sirish) — Tue, 06 Dec 2011 20:25:39 PST

Charlie Chaplin -

1.I am very lucky to be alone,Because i have nobody to loose

2."My ambition is to make the whole world to SMILE, because the world made me to CRY" DO good even to those who hurt you!....

Charlie Chaplin's three heart touching statements :-(1st) nothing is permanent in this world,not even our troubles.!

(2nd)- i like walking in the rain,because nobody can see my tears..! and

(3rd)- most important the most wasted day in life,is,the day,in which,we have not laughed!!

"My pain may be the reason for somebody's laugh. But my laugh must never be the reason for somebody's pain".

anecdote

noreply@blogger.com (Sirish) — Fri, 03 Jun 2011 21:48:03 PDT

Three nice stories

1.Once all villagers decided to pray for rain,on the day of prayer all people gathered and only boy came with an umbrella.THAT'S FAITH.

2.Example of the feeling of a one year old baby. when you throw him in the air ,he laughs because he knows you will catch him.THAT'S TRUST

3.Every night we go to bed,we have no assurance to wake up alive the next morning but still we have plans for tomorrow.....THAT'S HOPE.

Good morning.

Pecuilar

noreply@blogger.com (Sirish) — Fri, 03 Jun 2011 21:48:03 PDT

sardar creates new mail id

gmail@sardar.com

google shocks

computer blocks.

user jumps

hacker dies.

virus cries.

sardar rocks.

Good morning.

Proportional

noreply@blogger.com (Sirish) — Thu, 29 Dec 2011 00:58:16 PST

Newtons Law Of Love-

Every Boy on earth is attracted to a Girl With a force Directional proportional to Her Beauty And inversely proportional to power of her dad/Brother.

Good Morning.

impulse

noreply@blogger.com (Sirish) — Fri, 03 Jun 2011 21:48:03 PDT

LIFE and TIME are the world's best two teachers
Life teaches us the use of TIME & TIME teaches us the value of LIFE.
good morning Have a nice day.

adulation

noreply@blogger.com (Sirish) — Fri, 03 Jun 2011 21:48:03 PDT

TO LOVE SOME ONE - IS NATURAL.
TO BE LOVED BY SOMEONE - IS LUCK
TO LIVE WITH SOMEONE YOU LOVE - IS ACHIEVEMENT
TO LIVE WITH SOMEONE WHO LOVES YOU - IS LIFE

coffee

noreply@blogger.com (Sirish) — Fri, 03 Jun 2011 21:48:03 PDT

sometimes we struggle through a tastless coffee till d last sip,
and find the sugar lying at the bottom..
---that's LIFE..
sweetened but not stirred well...good morning.

Love is a

noreply@blogger.com (Sirish) — Tue, 06 Dec 2011 04:50:10 PST

Love is a greeting card'

Life is a progress card'..

Lover is a warranty card'

but good friendship is a guaranty card.

Gud night.

Guts

noreply@blogger.com (Sirish) — Fri, 03 Jun 2011 21:48:03 PDT

Love v/s exam

Love : lots of thoughts in mind..but no guts to express.

Exam : lots of guts to express..but no thoughts in mind...

good morning...