Futuri$tic Woo

M- Lifestyle Feature

2014-12-08T13:41:00.001-08:00

I had the pleasure of being interviewed for the magazine to look out for in 2015, M- Lifestyle! They are all about positivity, knowledge, empowerment and spotlighting young entrepreneurs. Please check out the article and follow them as they rise! http://mlifestyle.us/bold-beautiful-business-minded/

Embracing Change.

2014-11-10T08:12:00.000-08:00

Right around November every year things seem to move rather quickly. It feels like a transitional time frame where you begin to consider the things you wish to take into the year approaching and all that you want to leave behind. Like many people we can tend to go into control mode when we feel unsure of the changes that are happening so rapidly; consider if instead of fighting against change you embraced it and challenged the change to make you better, point you abrubtly to the direction you should be heading into and give you tools that will help you physically, mentally, spiritually, & finacially. Change happens to us multiple times a day but we don't pay it any mind because we have a comfort zone with change but when something appears as if it could threaten where we are now in life and spiritually we scatter and run & because of that we have just revealed ourselves complacent. I use the term complacent because that is how I felt spiritually during one Novemeber. I was comfortable keeping a certain distance from any and everything because I had years to retreat and just work on myself & business. But there is a certain level of business responsibility that now puts you on the level of doing Gods work.When you are in position to influence people you have the power to do anything with that influence including making it positive. Trust that whatever changed you are experiencing at this time is a part of the BIG picture & allow yourself to work through the shift & positively apply the lessons & blessings that change brings. Peace & Love. - B.Ross

A year ago today...

2014-09-28T20:18:00.001-07:00

I was so excited, nervous, anxious, & FULL of true faith when I signed a two year contract binding me to pay $232 a week for my salon studio. At the time I was leaving a TOP salon in Richmond that was paying me $15/hr plus tips (great start for a stylist) & I was working along side a team that was very talented with people I was able to learn from in a short period of time. Although all seemed to be well I still lacked fulfillment; in downtime I wasn't ok being a "maid", folding towels, replinishing product or even pretending I was busy... I wanted to do more, use my down time to work on more art & creativity so when the opportunity came to sign on with Sola I ran as fast as I could. For the FIRST time I made a huge adult decision that I consulted with no one with but Allah (God). I prayed relentlessly & literally said if the word (at the time I was studying from the Bible) is true GOD is my provider & I should walk by FAITH not by sight so let's see what happens when actually do just that. The night before my official open I cut off the lights, prayed & cried over the salon.

When I started I had less than $1,000 in my account, no savings, my student loans were piling up, medical bills from dental work were aquiring interest,

I had a credit card that I was working to pay off and from the outside looking in you can see I was in NO sane position to leave a steady check to make this solo commitment. Mentally I was aware that my financial situation may not allow me to prosper by doing this but spiritually I was in tune with what God was asking me to do & because I trust God I trust that the bottom line would be that all my NEEDS would be met. Once I signed on I shared my vision with everyone and announced what I was doing. I had a celebration dinner at C'est la Vin (which the owner graciously allowed me to reserve the space for FREE!), also that same week a photographer by the name of Will offered his services for FREE to capture the nights events).

The night of the celebration dinner was so special because many of my close friends & family were there & they all signed a beautiful framed poster I had put together to hang in the salon to remind me that I CAN do all things through Christ & in moments of doubt their encouraging words would uplift me. From the moment I started working for myself my higher self has been growing unbelievabley. There is no greater feeling than depending on the Lord & even in tight times having unwavering faith & watching things work out brings beauty to any pain. My first year has had MANY challenges as well, there has been times my account has been overdrawn, often I do not get paid because my business & personal expenses exceed income but each time things seem to be unbearably tough I still smile, thank GOD In advance & the trial doesn't last long. Through the toughest of times I believe in GODS planning & purpose even more & I'm thankful for still having my rent paid for the salon, still being able to get to work, feed myself, and my clients would never know the personal hardships I faced to have the salon open & he blesses me with the spirit to make my clients feel better about themselves & sharing the word. In the beginning of the difficult financial times I started a Fundme account to raise building funds so that I could rest assure I would be able to stay open and the response from Facebook friends was amazing! They helped me raise $800! I was able to actually not touch that and I transformed that same account to a foundation fund that will act as the funds to help get materials, workshops, food, and clothing to non-profits (including the one I founded that's currently in development the Blushed Beauties Flundation). All in all this 1st year has been a test of not only my faith, but my integrity, patience, diligence, & attitude and I'm so humbled and blessed to have made it through! I went from 50 clients to over 180, I have been able to maintain my most important finances & although I still have a ways to go I KNOW this second year will be even more amazing. There are so many blessings that I could share but that would make this blog a book (which may manifest one day). I literally have something GOD sent happen to me if not every day every week so just know the Lord is REAL and waiting for you to act in complete love, humility, and courage! You can achieve all things when you think in your higher self and abandon the need for materialistic things (those things will come naturally )invest in your vision and in the vision of others. The UNIVERSE is waiting for you! Thank you for helping me make this first year a success without you all I wouldn't be able to do it by myself! Love, B

I prayed FOR you, I prayed for YOU.

2014-06-15T23:21:00.002-07:00

I prayed FOR you long before we met & you were chasing women following behind their behinds, when I dwelled in the smallest corner in the back of your mind, I prayed for YOU I prayed for patience when you were too young to receive me that in due time we'd align prayed infidelity would escape us & I'd never leave you to grieve me & we'd never fight over money 'cause neither one of us is greedy that was me, praying for you when I was just an idea attached to your prayers with no face, the spirit to comfort you after Jesus when you were in that lonely place it was my prayer that you would stay and I'd be blessed by your grace I prayed that you'd see me manifest beyond the spiritual existence that you boxed me into When You could only see me in your dreams I prayed for YOUR dreams to come true I prayed over your eyes so that you could see beyond myself in addition to love, patience, wisdom, health, and wealth I prayed for beauty and power so the universe would connect me and you I prayed for YOU I prayed for patience for the moments I can't get you out of a rut and in times of hardship I prayed for a satisfying makeup 'cause we make up what love is and I only want to see Love in you "my God" (I'm in awe) I prayed FOR you and MY prayers came true.

Lead by LOVE.

2014-04-27T21:50:00.001-07:00

I FIRST want to say that this post is a reflection of my personal beliefs which happen to be influenced by MY spiritual relationship with God. It is my prayer that the reader(s) of this respects my views if there happens to be disagreement with the following statements I make. We are all different and nothing can be perceived perfectly. This blog will be broken down in two parts, the FIRST will be my story & the second will be the message I have for followers of Christ.

THE TESTIMONY:

As a child my parents raised me to believe in Christ, they took me to church, they taught me how to pray, praise, & fellowship, I was directed to read the bible, & through all of this embedded in me was the culture of what it is to be a Christian amongst Christians ... on SUNDAY. Monday - Saturday I learned what it was to be a Christian outside of church, I learned that WE go to church because we need a healing, we were imperfect, we born into sin, & as a child those things translated into we were "bad" & in order to not be bad I needed to accept Jesus as my Lord & savior and be SAVED. I'll never forget the time when my parents were urging me to be baptized. I personally wanted to wait because I didn't believe I was saved yet, God had never spoken to me, I had never been moved by him, I still didn't understand the logic of God & Jesus being ONE because they said Jesus was his son... Oh and the Holy Spirit was like Casper the friendly Ghost in my eyes but I was getting older & I wanted to honor my mother and father so I was baptized. After my baptism I felt great, THAT DAY. Realistically I was still a little girl who hadn't even had her first period yet, still thought boys had coodies, and didn't know that any other religion other than Catholic exsisted (and I thought all Catholics were just like Baptist Christians but white people, haha.) Fast Forward to my teen years when I actually was mature enough to LISTEN in church, I heard a lot of sermons that were 80% telling us everything we are doing wrong and warning us about being condemned to hell and 20% of the sermon was from the bible. Now, not only am I feeling the pressure of adolescence (boys, vanity, popularity) but I'm scared to talk to God & I fear going to hell more than being excited that one day I'll make it to heaven. I didn't LIKE how church made me feel. As a result of the church experiences that haunted me, I left the church when my parents could no longer tell me what to do and I grew into a young adult who prayed fearfully and cried constantly repenting for doing things that came naturally to me, I realized I was a sinner. I feared that although I was baptized, I read the bible, I believed, & I repented for my sins that somehow I could still end up in hell because I would never be good enough. Christians were always there with their non comfort and judgment when you did something wrong so I learned to keep secrets & to lie because I didn't want to dissapoint them, not knowing that those very people who seem to always have a word for the life of others had secrets too & told lies... Years later when the hypocrisy of it all had been made clear and the similarity of ALL people was exposed, I met people of many other religions/lifestyles & I no longer feared death but believed death for a child of God is the reward for fufiing your purpose on earth. I communicated with God outside of just prayer & God started to make his presence more and more known to me. I was still sinning something terrible (college years... I'm sure YOU all remember those years) however I was developing a spiritual relationship with God outside of church and my concious kicked in (the beginning of discernment) & because HE knew that nobody from my past could lead me to church but that's what I needed he placed a woman in my life who became my mentor. How this woman and I met would be another post, but she was the FIRST Christian I had met that saw my "ugly" and never said ONE discouraging thing to me. She never mentioned me going to hell, she SHARED stories of her past with me and explained the LOVE God had for all of us despite what we've done and more than anything when I did something right she glorified me! Her acknowledging me for my right doings made me want to do more right because her silence was the equivelant of a rainy day and I desired the light of happiness more than the loneliness of darkness. She led me back to church & I started sharing for once my LOVE of God! Eventually I FELT truly saved (and I wasn't yet in the eyes of Christians) I knew this because in order to join the ministry of this church I would have to not drink, smoke, shack up... You know all the things most of us have once done in our lifetime. And at the time although the church I was attending didn't turn out to be quite the fit for me because that application made me feel the same inadequence I felt as a child in church she STILL loved me and when I think of Christianity I think of her leading by example & love because to her it doesn't matter where I worship as long as I worship & she had faith that GOD would work on me all she had to do is love me. I know that story was lengthy BUT I said all of that to work up to my message which is LEADING BY LOVE.

THE MESSAGE:

Did YOU know? A Christian who makes it their business to magnify a sinners sin, or act as if through their personal relationship with God they have attained the right to order the steps of others does more to turn people off from God & church than lead them to it? Remember the things you've done in the darkness while exalting him in the light before you break down the terms of what being "saved" is or is not, we all felt the embarrassment of feeling like the preacher was talking to US. Part of being a Christan is being tested, failing sometimes, learning, & literally giving life to the phrase that "there is no testimony without the test" and guess what? We are never done testing until we are resting at least I'm not. Like anything else in order for things to manifest we must SPEAK it. So when I see people posting or preaching about HOW God wants people to be, how people who believe in Jesus should or shouldn't act, & mocking the level of where people who exhault his name are at I immediately feel pitty for the one "condemning" more than the one that "should be" condemned. A persons habits & immaturity doesn't take away from THEIR personal relationship with God so if one minute they are posting about the goodness of God and the next they are cursing people out remember they are still being tested and you were not always where you were. The fact that they KNOW God is a blessing and organically they will change because GOD is in control. If instead of criticizing we celebrated EVERY time the Lords name was mentioned, perhaps people would want to say it more & live it more. We must learn to mind our business, turn our cheek to the small immature things and GIVE LOVE and represent The Lord by being that example, and it takes not a finger pointed to do so. I'm guilty of judging & I believe we subconsciously all do but I'm not going to verbally discredit a persons belief because they are growing in Godliness. I won't acknowledge them when they do bad, that does more. If we are ALL imperfect what good is it to point out specific imperfections of others as if our sin is less than theirs. Let's be encouraged to lead by LOVE.

Thankfulness.

2014-02-16T20:27:00.001-08:00

Every single day I am amazed by how God truly loves me. The faithfulness of The Lord despite the many complexities of my being gives me a peace that allows me to be WELL with things. I still experience every human emotion, I still have bad things happen to me, I still make mistakes BUT I'm in a constant state of growing and my life is fruitful (& I'm not talking about materialistic things) Pam made a great statement tonight that she tells her children so nobody feels jealous, she said "Every child gets what they NEED" & the same applies to us as adults. We don't always get what we WANT but look at how God has always provided you with the tools to have what you NEED. Don't tally up the THINGS people have (the car, the clothes, the friends, the house, the relationship), you don't know what that person has been through to have those things social media is an illusion, nobody truly post EVERY detail of their life. I PRAY seriously that everyone can just mute their own thoughts, assumptions, opinions & be still enough to let God comfort you & continue to provide you with what you NEED. ❤️ Love.

((NEW POEM))

2014-02-06T19:21:00.002-08:00

Sleepless nights Scattered thoughts Broken images "truths" untaught

Angry voices inside my head the man that haunts me beneath my bed Darkness surrounds me blinds my view morning light the sky is blue

Slaves of day the field is green No such thing as the American dream

False idols new religions history aligning them all

Jesus mocked guns cocked the kings crown falls off

Black power black hate black cards black clothes the new black hoarse men riding by on dirt roads

Silent cries Long goodbyes Or no good bye at all

Pretty girl Little girl Whose dream to be queen still lives on

Barely living Getting by

Fairytales were all lie

Now she wishes she could live beyond what's up in the sky ... she desires to fly She reads books & gets high

Then delivers a message to the world "Wake up it's time to rise"

"Aha!" Moment. (This isn't a poem)

2013-12-05T20:07:00.001-08:00

Loving is easy, what makes it seem difficult is us constantly trying to find "IT" duplicating "love" by comparing it to the past non-lovers we had. Tallying up the mistakes and waiting for any reason to not love is NOT love. I think we are made to be vessels of Love & love is heartbroken when misunderstood, mocked, and things fall apart. I feel love is authentic, it comes naturally like a mother loves her child. You aren't taught how to love you "just know" what's right. Love doesn't make you second guess everything, love needs no other confirmation it's certain like God is. Love is an action that's in constant motion, it is not SELECTIVE & it can't be controlled. Love isn't anything like "sorta kinda" or LIKE... Love makes you "judge not" & Love never dies, or lies. The irony of all this "love" talk is I think we've misused the word love and do things in the name of love way before we experience the spiritual reality of actually BEING "Love" or like Love (God). So, because I've grown into Love, naturally, organically, & without a parade I will believe others when they say they "Love" me because perhaps just like me they may have grown into Love too. Most of the times people "love=luv=like" me and things get difficult but because I've always Loved them I will forgive, I will not distance myself far enough to be unreachable, Love has the same number & is always there when you call. I really LOVE people, even people I don't like & that Love saves lives, lends a hand, listens, & prays, feeds, holds, cares. * I want to say thank you to my #1 Love,GOD (the perfect Love). I also thank those family and friends who truly love me like I love them. I knew it instantly because you guys exude love & are easy to love!... ❤️

Subconscious Thoughts From "The Heart" - By B. Ross

2013-11-25T22:25:00.000-08:00

Oh bitter heart of mine, you lie to yourself pretending to still hold warmth but you are cold /
You desire the bliss of lovers yet chuckle at the not so happy endings / You long to be right more than you long for the light to enter the dark cavity of where purity once lived /
Fairytales of your virgin years now become the horror stories of your future, your heart no longer believes in "US" /
once sweet heart, you've dried and withered from the scorching romances of summer, fall winds sweep your cheek to erase the silent tears you've cried for me, & by snow fall you are as dark as 6 o' clock /
in the end dear heart of mine
you are left with only a portion of life which you've reserved /
you reject anything other than perfection and so, you are left, with only your God. Thank God He's enough.

A gift for Jill : Oct 2013 "Pink Promise" survivor recipient

2013-11-22T12:16:00.002-08:00

This year Blushed by B.Ross launched a new stylish way to get women involved in supporting Breast Cancer Awareness Month. With 5 shades of pink nail polish we were able to donate a portion of the proceeds to a local Breast Cancer Survivor. In the gift bag our recipient Jill received an array of goodies including a Visa Gift Card & a beautiful mug with scripture from local business 3 inspirations. Below is the story of Jill, written by her daughter Brien who nominated her. And so it begins at a normal doctors checkup where my mom, Jill Hughes, expresses concern about what feels like a bruise on her right breast. The moment that changes your coarse in life; yet you don't even know it until later, when you get that phone call. Two mammograms, two biopsies, and an mri later, Jill knows for sure that breast cancer is now her new path. Very quickly there were many doctors appointments. Decisions like lumpectomy verses mastectomy and which type of reconstruction will be best needed to be made. It became apparent that although the doctors were important, it was more important that Mom did her research and chose the treatments that would best benefit herself. My mom made the brave decision to have a double mastectomy with reconstruction via expanders and implants. Her thoughts were to get rid of the cancer and the possibility of getting breast cancer again. As her child, I worried because this was such a drastic surgery compared to the option of lumpectomy. But I knew, although our opinions mattered, as her family our job was to simply support the woman we love so dearly. This proved to be a longer road to travel than anticipated. The mastectomy and placing expanders in went smooth, but there was another battle to fight. During the healing process infection began to set in. Mom spent an extra seven days in the hospital and had a pic line inserted so that she could administer her own antibiotics at home. Ultimately, one of the expanders had to be removed and replaced. More surgery. Finally! Two years after this whole thing began, Jill got her final surgery. Permanent implants to complete the process. My mom was very lucky to have chosen a plastic surgeon that was willing to hold her hand from start to finish. Through the frustration of this infection in which he was unfamiliar, he did not give up or pass her through the system to someone else. Although the cancer is gone, Jill s life will never be the same. Nothing is to be taken for granted. Through education, strong support, and her choice to fight, my mom has been an inspiration for all of her family and friends. Her best advice yet: Life is only ten percent circumstance while the other ninety is how you chose to deal with it. Brien Culliton

Don't Cry.

2013-11-02T04:36:00.001-07:00

Ever heard the phrase "Don't cry over spilled milk?" then actually spilled a glass of milk before? If you're guilty of a shakey hand, someone bumping into you, or just plain clumsiness I'm sure your initial reaction went a little something like "(fill in appropriate curse word)"; but once you got a paper towel to clean it up you probably discovered a few things...

MILK does more good than harm. I've spilled milk and realized it cleaned the floor better! In actuality milk repairs cracked china, cleans patent leather, softens dry skin and hands, helps sooth bug bites, removes ink stains from clothes, polishes silverware; must I go on? This isn't a post on the wonders of milk but it's one to remind you that in life there are some "spills" that don't require a tear to clean up. Some people may come into your life and it seems like they are there to pour into you until it "runneth over", like a glass that's too full. When what seems like a mess occurs, you still have the upper hand to react however you CHOOSE (Catch this: I didn't say you have the option to FEEL how you choose, but REACT). When the "milk" spills don't make a huge fuss over it, clean it up, polish yourself off, think of this post and laugh because you're probably going to be better off than you were before! There are many surprises in life disguised as a "spills". Happy tipping! LOL ;)

I am NOT afraid.

2013-08-28T19:20:00.001-07:00

My people,

Over the past few years there has been prominent clues suggesting us to research the integrity of our country & rethink the term "freedom" (FREE DOOM as rephrased in a Kanye West song). The fact that we have a sense of simple daily decision making freedom does not dismiss how we are enslaved by the political & media lies that keep us ignorant & misinformed or that we are thrown into financial bondage by outrageous taxing, interest rates, & petty legal "fees". The American people are forced to hang ourselves by consuming the products that they tax us on and with that tax the money is used for everything BUT the betterment of our people and the people in other countries. The small over publicized acts of "help" in other countries made by the government are most times propaganda used to throw off the true intent on invasion... many blame it on illuminat but no matter the cause of these sick mind games you can hear and see via YouTube & other resourceful outlets the cries & warnings from celebrities and other multimillion dollar persons who have attest to the greed & power those "above us" seek & have. Although all these things get us worked up and upset & were constantly THINKING of how to escape this revolution that is happening we must realize that every generation will go through revolution and revelation. Do not allow the news, music, & media destroy your joy or anger you. If you can't do anything about it PRAY. There is POWER in prayer. My hope would be for us to MAKE the government (everywhere)stop the making of bombs, & other chemical destruction weapons. Ban it ALL! The people will have nothing to fight with & innocent people can stop dying. The problem isn't the mass majority it's the few who hold the money & the power so I want you all to pray for peace & love but more importantly pray for the revolution to be televised because in 2016 we will have to start the process of election once again and with all that's happening in Syria and all around the world we need US in office. Real people, people who've been abused by the system. We need to get organized with one another. That is all for now I'll be giving more of my perspective at later times & doing some videos... Rem this blog is only MY opinion & it's neither wrong or right so if you choose to disagree do so respectively Peace.

2013-07-03T21:40:00.001-07:00

July fourth.

2013-07-03T21:17:00.001-07:00

Today, as God would have it I am spending time alone gathering my thoughts and truly mediating on my Plan of Action. In everything there needs to be a P.O.A, many times we know where our destination is but we fail to plan the route in which we will get there. When planning each and every small detail matters (think about if our navigation was general and ill-detailed). The more detailed the plan the quicker the fail and the faster the recovery so you can get back on track. YES I said the quicker the FAIL. Every plan doesn't work the first go around but a client of mine told me that her office's motto was "if you fail quickly you can recover and try something new". There is nothing worse than trying to force your first plan to work after seeing NO results. If you feel like things aren't going as planned yet you have written down your P.O.A go back and make revisions. Just like a essay, making revisions doesn't make it a new story it makes it a better one! Happy Fourth! Happy learning!

Don't do it!

2013-06-24T21:26:00.001-07:00

Fast Forward.

2013-06-24T21:17:00.001-07:00

Ladies & Gents:

If you were happier in life before someone came into it then it is time to let them go. So many times we try to prolong a relationship that we see potential in because we believe that out of patience there will be loyalty & positive results. This is NOT always true. Realize that everyone is dealing with their own personal journey and if that person is not heading in the same direction you are dont get off track and make a million u turns in hopes that things will go the way you WANT to see them go. Many times we allow people to stay in our lives well past their expiration date because there is no argument or "reason" to just stop being friends however; the moment things become complicated and intentions are not known (after you've tried to discuss it) then it is time to move forward. As working individuals every moment of spare time is precious time. Why spend your precious time on those who can't effectively communicate & leave you feeling uneasy. Out of the many things in life we can't choose who we are friends with is one we should choose wisely. (I hope that this reaches those of you who know where you're headed & need to gain focus. We all play the same role at one point in time to people & maybe WE are the friend that someone needs to let go. Either way stay on YOUR track & allow those who genuinely want to stick around do so.)

Things Fall Apart

2013-06-20T00:09:00.001-07:00

2013-06-20T00:07:00.001-07:00

What is in my head if far more important than what's in my closet

~ B. Ross (My current read continues to be side tracked by looking up every word I don't understand & every reference I'm not familiar with.)

Truth.

2013-06-17T22:47:00.001-07:00

To most ppl I appear as an open book but nobody really knows 100% of me. So many things I actually leave unsaid because I know some people can't communicate effectively ... Or struggles I go through that would take more than a 15 min conversation to understand. People "ain't got time" but the blessing in that is it forces me to allow God to occupy more of my time. He knows every moment I'm alone I'm talking to him, confiding, & being my pure self unfiltered & questioning his place for me & what I can do better, how to be more still. I need to be less available mentally from this world & physically to the ppl of the world. It's important that in the midst of spiritual growth I distance myself to allow a clear vision on THE PURPOSE.

Learn.

2013-06-10T22:15:00.001-07:00

Today I watched a documentary exposing the corruption of our government. None of what I saw surprised me because I've known that many of the disease and viruses that plague us as a people have been man made, injected in insects such as mosquitoes and tics, and spread as bio warfare on our own people. What I got out of this was however very interesting. I realized that WE the tax payers intrust and enable the government to control our land, heck its our money that pays their salary! Because they do so well with hiding their intentions of scientific studies we are blinded by these attacks. The less we come together as a people the more TIME the government has to create all kinda of disease and even creatures to keep us as their slaves (like the humanzee, now picture that mixed with you not being able to own a firearm! How could we defend ourselves against that?!?). Here is my challenge for you for the week ( hold me accountable so I do it too!): For every meaningless Facebook, twitter, or Instagram post you make you need to post one that holds value. This post can be a fact, a quote, a discovery, or something educational. Imagine if we all shared something interesting that we knew! It could spark someones passion to research more! We need to lead together before one day we wake up to a world of chaos (which is occurring somewhere right now) Don't SLEEP. Get money, get a passport, read books, and be prepared.

Help me, help myself.

2013-06-05T21:44:00.001-07:00

The other day I told MYSELF "I believe everything I say for everyone but ME". After the words left my lips I felt overwhelmed with emotion because finally I realized that it was my subconscious thinking that has been hindering me from obtaining the full bliss I so desperately seek. Not only was that moment a reflection of how I thought of my love life but it literally told my entire life (money, friends, ect) At that moment, all I could do was go into what I call RECOVERY.

I FIRST identified the issue by taking a pause AFTER I spoke today and seeing how it effects my emotions (this goes against the proper way of pausing before you speak) for example: A coworker told me how she met the love of her life on Match.com & I jokingly replied saying I was going to join. (PAUSE) My negative subconscious immediately went off in my head telling me that it wouldn't happen that way for me, there was no way I could meet someone & fall in love & him actually be GOOD. See, the problem isn't if it would or wouldn't happen (that's Gods work) the problem is me immediately expecting less than I desire. The reason I needed a pause after my FIRST initial thoughts was to make sure I accurately identified with my own emotion before my learned behavior of altering my responses to sound optimistic jumped in the way.

After I figured out what my issue was I then began to think, 'why don't I believe great things for my love life?'. I went through a list of reasons, thought about things like 'am I too picky?', 'is there bad karma I could have caused?', 'is it ME?'... Aha! That's IT... My next point! I was associating my CURRENT issue with the PAST when the past holds no value for TODAY. At that moment I laughed, prayed to GOD to fix my attitude towards love and being single and I realized that things are the way they are not because of Karma (if that was the case half of the happily married couples I know would be in a world of distress), things are how they are because God is allowing me to recognize things about myself that perhaps I wouldn't even notice if I was in a relationship. My current lesson is still in session & I'm learning to not just say things and believe them with my head... I need to believe GOOD things for me with my heart. Believe good things for YOU. You owe it to the child you once were, the child with no fear, no stigmas about love, the optimistic you to believe you will be what you want to be when you grow up. WE are never too grown to grow. As a reminder of this to myself check out my new lock screen/background pic on my phone lol ;) I'm a soon to be QUEEN

*Feel free to leave a comment ;) I would love to start discussing the topics on my blog!*

Tatted up? Or Telling tales?

2013-06-03T20:25:00.001-07:00

ALL of my tattoos are inspired by something. This Tree happened to be a cover up for a tattoo I got in Arabic that just so happened to mean nothing according to a friend from Sudan I met years after. The reason I chose this gnarly tree was because there is a quote that I often repeat to those I meet and that is "A people without knowledge of their history is like a TREE without roots" Marcus Garvey. The three birds represent my sisters and I... I will always respect them and take with me the things that they have taught me. This tattoo is still in progress because I want to dedicate this tree to my entire family, they are my ROOT. Maybe I will add more birds or maybe I'll add names and make them look like branches. Regardless of anything I have NO REGRETS.

Roll wit me!

2013-06-02T23:53:00.001-07:00

LOVER FRIENDS.

2013-06-02T21:57:00.002-07:00

When I was a teen my parents would always introduce the guy I was dating, to family as my "Friend". As if the introduction really made any difference, I was always offended; I felt that whoever I was dating at the time deserved the label "BOYFRIEND". In my late teens/ early 20's my friends and I would say 'I don't want a boyfriend I want a MANfriend'. NOW I say, 'it would be nice to just have a FRIEND'. It's funny how the saying "Your parents are always right" rings a bell whenever I get those "AH HA!" moments in my head. With age you're suppose to grow and as you grow you realize that the slick comments made by your parents were almost a foreshadowing. At 24, I realize most people in our lives don't even know how to be a friend let alone more. A friend is someone who is like next to kin. Friends should be the people that hold you accountable when you're wrong, they should be loyal, support your business endeavors, and when you're not around a FRIEND is one who speaks so highly of you (despite ALL they could say about you) to the point that even you're surprised by your own greatness. Today when I sat down and thought about what I wanted in a soul mate "FRIEND" is what came to mind. Think about it, we ALL have "friends" that we argue with, then we make up; friends who we don't have to talk to everyday but when we come together it's like we never skipped a beat. Friends become the God parents to our children, they are our designated drivers (with whom we trust our lives even when they've been drinking too, only less than us), and friends hold our secrets (the ones family may not even know about). Why wouldn't you expect that GREATNESS in your future spouse? If you can be a great friend; someone who is honest and loyal you can perhaps move forward to becoming something more, like FAMILY. I challenge my people to evaluate the substance of the relationships around you. Are you with your friend? No matter if the dynamic of the relationship changes REAL friends last forever. Love last FOREVER. Boyfriends & Girlfriends come and go. SEEK friendship, not a title, because a real friend will know how to handle your heart without having to label you anything other than their FUTURE. Wherever there is friendship I'm sure love is somewhere waiting near.

XO- Ms. Ross

Sometimes I'm THE student.

2013-04-02T21:45:00.000-07:00

Somebody I once wanted turned out to be the greatest teacher to me. With his consistent inconsistency he first taught me patience. I become infatuatuated quickly because it is rare that I let people into my mental space however, I never let my heart lead me because my heart has no "reason" behind decision making and with this man dropping in and out of my life it made me respect the space of those who have dreams and ambitions (assuming his busy schedule was in fact due to his career). I never want to be a distraction so I learned to be patient and appreciate the attention and time I did get. With his charm he taught me humility, I'm always the one being chased but once the doors of communication seemed open I allowed myself to humbly express how I felt. Being able to be humble empowered me, I felt bold enough to say what it is & that was a breakthrough for me :) Lastly, he taught me that I am not owed anything, I can't control everything, and that I'm capable of making respectable decisions for myself. The last lesson he taught was a multitude of lessons but in the end this man who I wanted so bad but did me so shady (so I felt) is the first one I have no ill feelings towards, I'm not upset, I'm not angry, I didn't even mention anything about his phoniness because honestly I GET IT! Sometimes when ppl enter our lives we try to fit them in a space that we can label, even if that space isn't available we try to reserve it for them later. The truth is God works in mysterious ways so when you feel like you've been let down, realize that there is a lesson that was learned and if your open enough you can receive it and realize the role of people in your lives are already determined. Put less emphasis on WHAT role people are playing and focus on WHY they play their part. :) SN: I hope this man understands however, I am a Taurus woman with pride so I will never make an effort to talk or see him again unless I'm awkwardly in the same room with him BUT if he comes across this blog... I did appreciate the lesson and I wish we could have just ended it right there, that night when it was just us, the sand, and the moon. That would have been in some way a happIER ending.