FWeekin Fail

Update: Absenses and All That

2015-06-30T00:02:00.002-05:00

So, to anyone who's visited in the past, oh, forever, you know I haven't been updating this blog much. There are a couple of reasons for that. Don't worry, I won't leave you hanging. The truth is, FW stopped being something light-hearted and got ultra serious for a bit. Then it stopped being that and just stopped being something I cared about at all. My alliance, I.LAW, had stopped really remotely resembling the alliance it had started out to be. In some ways that was not a bad thing. However, whenever a creation takes a life of its own (fully recognizing that I was one of multiple creators and cannot take full ownership, nor would I wish to), sometimes you lose that connection to it that made it special for you. Now, I.LAW and In Exile will always hold a dear place in my heart. That's why the corp still exists, though not in an active form. However, they can't hold my attention. For those who don't know, in my real life, I am a law student. That entails a good deal of stress (largely good stress) and time. I got burnt out on EVE because I was burning out on life. All of these things made writing a light hearted satirical blog about FW rather pointless. It's still pretty pointless since I unsubbed my accounts a month or two ago. However...

I'm not done with EVE. I'm not. EVE's been a part of my life for almost 8 years. I need some space at the moment, but I know I'll be back to it. But, what of this blog? What will I write here? Will I write here? What the hell will I say?

That really depends on what I do when I get back. The way it looks, I'll probably be heading out to null-sec to rejoin friends. Why? Because I'm an old bittervet. It's comfortable. Also, I'm not a PVE sort of person and null-sec ratting is about the only PVE I can stand. So, that's the update. Now you know what I'm doing and I can say that I've written something here. With any luck, I'll get the urge to write fun stuff ridiculing the day to day life of null-sec. I'm probably going to have to change the name, though. FWeeking Fail wouldn't really work, would it?

So, patience. Patience and maybe a dancing llama?

Yeah. Dancing Llama.

Necro Time

2014-04-17T20:33:00.004-05:00

So, I've been away from this blog for a LOOOONNNG time. Seriously. It's been forever. Any readers I have left (which is probably not many at all) will probably not really care why I've been neglecting this particular blog of mine. Well, tough nuts, I'm gonna tell you anyway.

First, it should just be said that the metagame and all the attendant out of game stuff that fuels this sort of blog kind of dried up for me. To be honest, post-Inferno and over a period of time, a lot of the things that are uniquely Faction Warfare stopped really being uniquely Faction Warfare. We have our weird sov mechanic which is about as inane as the null-sec one. We have a host of null-sec style alliances now involved. The tight-knit community of FW players has become a sea of new faces which I haven't really gotten to know as well. This goes for both sides. When I first came to FW in the Amarr-Minmatar warzone, it was a vibrant community of people fighting for the sake of fighting. Pew was commonplace because there weren't really any other mechanics available that were worth a damn. I saw the same enemies on a regular basis and they became familiar. While both sides got frustrated with each other from time to time, I think a lot of people also had generally favorable views of the enemy, if only because they were willing to come out and kill or be killed in pretty close to even fights, some of which got pretty large. I'm not going to say that these fights stopped completely post-Inferno, but the fundamental nature of FW changed, and not for the better. This sapped my desire to write about it after a while, especially since I've never attempted to present a fair or balanced or even honest portrayal of the happenings in FW. This blog was always meant to be tongue-in-cheek. I think you can see why I ran into writer's block. It stopped really being funny.

Second, real life got really busy for me. Seriously. I'm a law student now, which takes up considerable time and energy. Nights when I had time, I often was too tired to even consider a three hour fleet (not to mention TZ considerations which would have me up until 1 a.m. before my 8 a.m. class). I am beginning to have a better budget of time and energy, which may free up more time in the future (or maybe not. Law school is a crapshoot that way). Also, I'm married, and wives have a funny habit of wanting to see their husbands from time to time. It's another thing in the balance, as it were.

Third, I have another blog which is an RP blog. It's a creative outlet for me and allows me to explore some topics vis-a-vis philosophy, morality, and other concepts of a literary nature. I'm not the next fucking Faulkner (I'd prefer to be more like Chuck Pahlaniuk anyway, honestly). I'm just saying, I like to write. RP > FW Trolling. True story. As the warzone stopped being terribly engaging for me, I started logging on more for the RP (because why just be a nerd when you can be Uber-Nerd?). So, basically, I stopped updating this blog in favor of frollicking through homicidal maniac pretend land and writing short stories about my characters, each of which tend to run the gamut from cold sociopath to manic emotional wreck on a regular basis (but in a classy way!). Also, people die a lot. Yeah. My stories involve a LOT of death (I stopped counting the bodies a while back after it started being meaningless...I mean 5 digits is excessive). Shameless plug time. If you want to check out my fiction writings: The Path of Strife. The newest post is first, so you should probably go to the archive and start at the beginning, or it won't make much sense (soooo much history).

Anywho, that's pretty much it for now. So, I dunno, go watch porn or something.

Why MMORPGs

2013-07-14T13:19:00.004-05:00

I was considering today why it is that I prefer MMORPGs over most other game types. Eve certainly has the pvp aspect, which I feel is probably a solid draw for a large number of players, but it can't be denied that pve is the biggest draw for games like WoW and its ilk. I can't really speak for anyone else in regards to the selling point of Eve in general. I can only really speak from my own experience.

Also, just this once, the trolling light is off. I'm actually writing a serious post.

Role-play

I didn't RP for probably the first year and a half to two years of playing Eve. At that point in time, it was something for myself and a bunch of work friends to do when we got home. I was in the Navy at the time, and my work friends were really my only friends, and my wife wasn't there at the time. So, Eve became our hobby, and one that cost much less than our old hobby of getting absolutely shit-faced at the nearby bar. I vomited slightly less, as well, which I saw as a definite improvement.

We formed our own little corporation and began to play around with running complexes and other pve nonsense, but I began to be quite bored with it. I managed to become CEO and I made us join with a pvp alliance in Geminate, and quickly splurged to set up system sovereignty in an out of the way system. This was back when sov was a matter of putting up and keeping up POS's. So, my little corp of 10 people held a shitty system for a very short period of time. Inevitably, much larger and more active alliances swooped in and ROFLSTOMPED the bajeezus out of our alliance. This was when I pulled us out of the alliance, got our towers out safely (True Sansha Large tower is not a pleasant thing to lose), and quickly went about killing noobs in high sec to get my fix. Before long, I had become estranged from my corp. I had lived in low-sec with maybe 3 ships to my name for about a month, killing where I could. But, this really wasn't enough to keep me playing.

I took a long time off before I came back and resumed my old high-sec ganking ways. I happened upon someone recruiting for TNT and decided to finally make my break with high-sec for good. I settled into null-sec rather comfortably for several months. But, then null-sec politics came into the picture. I decided I didn't want to be there anymore. An old friend's wife convinced me to join Amarr FW. This is where the reason I play MMORPGs finally came to be.

I met some very interesting people in KotMC. But, Shalee was probably the most important for the purposes of this discussion. Between her and Rin, I had been convinced to try out this RP business. It was shaky at first. I didn't know what RP was supposed to be like, and so I sat and watched for my first few tries before I began to really get the hang of it. I started an RP blog, intending to flesh out my character beyond the unscripted chatroom interactions. That blog (The Path of Strife) is now 108 posts long, and my character sufficiently complex that I am constantly interested in seeing what he will do next. He's gotten a life of his own.

That's why I play MMORPGs. MMOs allow you the ability to truly create another life, to breathe life and personality, neuroses, etc. into a character of your creation. MMOs provide another world, another history, and another framework in which to place that character and to explore their choices. It's not just about blowing up spaceships for me. It's about watching the triumphs and failures of a person I've grown quite attached to.

That's why I play MMORPGs, and that's why I RP.

The Ups and Downs of Taking a Break

2013-07-11T14:27:00.003-05:00

I recently took some time away from Eve. I've been reflecting a lot on it, which is kinda weird. However, this isn't the first break I've taken and there are some similarities I've found in every one of these absences.

The Good:

A break is good sometimes. After too many months of sinking more time into this game than just about any other aspect in my life, internet spaceships begins to actually seem like serious business. Losses start to seem suddenly important. KB stats are watched closely. Tempers begin to flare over imagined slights against imagined character. Stress begins to find its way into what is ostensibly an escape from stress. In short, you get way too wound up. Then, you start to log on because you feel like you owe it to everyone else. You play, not for fun, but out of obligation. Like a job. This leads to burnout. You just get tired. You find yourself loathing logging in. You begin to resent the game.

Thus, we get to the good parts of taking a break. You get to recharge. Your time away allows you to wash away all that negative shit. Then, when you finally venture back online, you see it fresh and the things that got you hooked originally hook you again. The thrill of blowing shit up. The camaraderie. The antics on comms. Even the vile fleet porn links.

The Bad:

The bad generally depends on how long you were gone. A few weeks comes with almost no drawbacks. But, if you drop off the radar for several months, like I did, it's not always so pretty when you return. Especially so if you are a director. Granted, as it's been stated, I'm a pretty shit director who didn't do much anyway, but when you return you find what little you did do is being done better by others. You find that the slew of patches that came out while you were away have fundamentally changed everything and you spend weeks trying to catch up. You find new members who don't even know who you are. The cozy atmosphere you created is replaced with one where you question what it is you are supposed to even be doing. Further, the corp you left may not be the same one you come back to. May still be the same people and same name, but things change when you're away.

The Remedy:

Generally, the best thing I've figured out to do is to simply go out in fleets, chat in corp chat, and spend time reconnecting on comms. Before long, you feel reintegrated. Your rustiness begins to fade, and so does that feeling of uselessness. That, and it's hard to be bummed when you blow up a fleet of minnies in shinier shit.

Anyway, I'm just using this post as a way of dumping the things I've been thinking onto screen and maybe purge some of it. Catharsis by verbal diarrhea or whatever.

Absence Makes Me Itchy

2013-07-05T11:08:00.002-05:00

So, I haven't written on here in a long time. A lot of that is due to an increase in RL obligations. However, I think a lot of it is also my being increasingly out of the loop regarding the "big picture" of FW.

Here's what I mean by that. I used to give a crap about sov. Not a huge crap, mind you. However, I cared somewhat. Then, despite what I thought would happen, sov suddenly meant ISK. That ruined sov for me. I didn't think it would, but the character of FW changed such that a lot of the "pvp4fun" was replaced by a desire to crush the other guy so you could increase your ISK. Further, tons of people flocked to FW for the purposes of getting space-rich. The status quo never really returned.

All is not bad news, though. Pvp is still enjoyable. However, nowadays I spend almost all my time in frigates fitted as cheaply as possible and leroying into minmatar gangs of cruisers of all tech levels, usually in greater numbers (lulz ensue).

That's okay, however, because it seems we happen upon all sorts of people in the warzone who derp themselves to death anyway. (http://eve-kill.net/?a=kill_related&kll_id=18563570)

And then there's the obligatory hotdrop from PL. We stumbled on their Hyperion and said "What the hell, why not?" and engaged. After about 10 mins or so, navitas arrived, popped cyno, and my slicer got up close to an Aeon shortly before going boom.

So, despite not giving a crap about sov, I will say I'm diggin the fights (if you wish to call them such) that I've encountered since my return to Eve. They may lack in the epic quality of some of the bashes of years past (battleships at Huola/Kourm), but they make up for it in lighthearted fun. I'm back and itchin for more.

A Strange Christmas Gift

2012-12-27T16:33:00.001-06:00

This is probably not news to most of my readership, which, I'm still not convinced is more than like Shalee and maybe five other people. However, assuming that this site does have a few other interlopers, I'll go ahead and give my own thoughts on the rather bizarre series of events this past week.

I left town for a few days to go see family in my hometown three hours away. On my way there, my mother in law was sent to the emergency room and then the ICU for critcally low blood sugar, difficulty breathing, infection, and a host of other complications. My wife and I raced to deal with this issue. After attending to those matters, we came to my parents' home where I checked my messages and discovered that my corp was essentially gone. This was Christmas Eve. My initial reaction was "Seriously?" I quickly fired off my own recommendations for how to deal with the situation.

By Christmas afternoon, In Exile was born, I.Law was gone, and people were already beginning to move. See, for us, it's not about the name. It's not about the stats. It's about the people. And this is why the actions of Sab0tag3 and his little buddy Druiel Druphestos were pretty much an epic failure. They don't understand that, because that's not how they are wired. See, when Sab0 tried to pull this nonsense the first time almost a year ago, we kicked him. We set him red, and that's pretty much how that ended for us. For the most part, we just moved on and stopped giving a damn. I can't really say I've given him much thought at all in the past year. So, when this business went down this past week, I took it as a compliment. Apparently, we've been quite at the forefront of his.

So, now we've got a new corp. We're already at 96% efficiency with 7 capital kills. When I finally get home, I'll be moving my toons over and will be going right back to business. That's what we do. So far, I am pleased to see the massive support of I.Law's members quickly joining up under our new banner. Thanks for not taking this to heart. I continue to be proud of all of our members.

So, I am writing this largely to say that we aren't going anywhere. We aren't letting this get to us. And, to Sab0tag3, allow me to say this: Merry Christmas. You have my deepest sympathy, and I hope you do well in your future endeavors, even if those endeavors continue to be mean-spirited attempts to ruin my Eve gameplay.

To everyone else, have a wonderful holiday. I look forward to being able to return to logging in sometime in the next few days.

-Ryven-

Infidelity

2012-12-10T11:36:00.001-06:00

I feel like a cheater. I have, for over four years, been married happily to this wondrous game, Eve Online. Ok, so we took a trial separation in 2010, but, otherwise, our marriage has been strong. Then fall 2012 hit and I have been running around behind Eve's back. I have a mistress or two. And I am red with shame.

Real life and Guild Wars 2. These are the harlots that have stolen me away on many a night. Real life demands my time. RL is a greedy, clingy bitch of a mistress. I would leave her but she blackmails me with my future. Guild Wars 2 dazzles me by placing no demands on me at all. She tempts me with her laissez faire.

I confess this in hopes it can bring me some slight absolution, and perhaps Eve and I can repair our broken relationship.

Surge

2012-11-20T10:43:00.001-06:00

So, these past few weeks have seen a dramatic increase in the number of Amarr in fleets. We have also had a number of impressive victories (cruiser fleet annihilating a smaller bc fleet taking 0 losses. Yes, we outnumbered you, but still, 0 losses?). This is likely to continue. I.LAW is actively recruiting and at a pace that I am constantly amazed by. It seems every time I log on I am asked to weigh in on approving an applicant. This pleases me. I.LAW has grown from a small group of ~10 to nearly 100 members. We are about to break into battleclinic's top 500 corps. Considering our meager beginnings, this is an accomplishment. I attribute it to a culture of inclusivity, patience, and a vast wealth of experience and knowledge.

So, is this a self-aggrandizing post to massage my own ego?

Hmm...yeah, I guess so.

Not Really Down or Out

2012-10-12T11:44:00.001-05:00

A lot has been said regarding morale. A lot has been said regarding the Amarr. Claims have been made that we are a beaten force. That we are a ragtag bunch of demoralized players obstinately clinging to the memory of a playstyle desecrated and systematically and brutally sodomized to death by a ghastly bag of winner take all game mechanics. I take exception to these claims.

It is true that we are outnumbered. In terms of active players logged in at US primetime, it is common to see double digit numbers in Militia chat, compared to average 200+ in Minmatar. It is true that we fundamentally haven't made a strong territorial push in some time. It is true that mechanics have been skewed out of our favor. We have taken some haymaker punches.

I don't feel that we are even remotely beaten. We recently gained Agony. Fweddit and others who left for Caldari are back in our warzone. Our pilots log on night after night, eager to fight. For a while now, there was a sense of alienation from system sov. I feel like this must be temporary. The Amarr are more unified, cohesive, and brimming with potential than they have been in ages.

So, don't count us out. And, in the off chance that some non-fw pilot reads this, come join Amarr. You will unlikely fly with a cooler bunch of people. Forget easy mode. Come here and prove your mettle. Here, we play on Hardcore.

Happy Birthday to I.LAW

2012-10-09T00:10:00.001-05:00

So, Almity reminded me of this tonight. It has been one year now since the bunch of us left KotMC and formed the awesome group that is Imperial Outlaws. Looking back on this past year, it's shocking how it both went by ridiculously fast, and also how it's very difficult for me to really remember EVE before these guys.

When I.LAW formed up, I was surprised to get invited to be a director by Shalee and Eran. I was not a big deal or anything, and in KotMC, I never really was sure if I fit in or not. I certainly liked most of the people, but wasn't really sure how I was recieved or whatever. So, naturally, I was really surprised to find I was not only welcome in I.LAW, but that I was being called to do more than just be there.

So, I had to think it over, but I made a critical decision that has shaped what I've become in this game. I've had a wonderful opportunity to help shape a small community into what is, without a doubt, one of the most enjoyable group of people I could ever hope to get to know. Somehow, we manage to attract cool people, and we cultivate an environment of fun and a pretty large helping of expertise.

A lot has happened in the past year. Being called all kinds of nasty things by both sides for our controversial move to Otosela, and then to Egghelende later on. Being set KOS by CVA at some point because of our NBSI policies (which didn't cause the end of the world after all). Having to deal with being locked out of almost every station in FW. Having to deal with being outnumbered and then being called whiners. Generally speaking, we've persevered quite nicely, and we've adapted.

There have been some rough times and some tempers have run high. That nasty corp theft bullshit, for one example. Almity gets a bit cranky from time to time, though we still love him. Interestingly enough though, Shalee is the glue that holds it all together. Almity is the fighter. Shalee is the glue. Me, I'm the comic relief and that chill dude in the corner saying, "Hey man. It'll be alright." So, if you haven't ever gotten to know us, you probably should. Why? Because we're awesome.

Frigate Fun

2012-10-06T09:58:00.001-05:00

I have been logging on for a lot shorter periods lately. School, work, marriage, and Borderlands 2 have kept me busy. So, I haven't been involved in any of the LNA bashes. Instead, I have been enjoying a lot of tiny frig solo or two man roams. Surprisingly, I haven't been shorted. It has been some of the best fun I have had in ages.

Merlins, Punishers, Incursi. Sure, I die more. But who gives a shit? I still rake in a steady supply of kills. And I don't have to deal with LNA. Good trade.

Wifflin' With the Brickbat

2012-09-16T10:09:00.001-05:00

So, last night, with no official fleet, a few of us rolled around Siseide blappin what we could. I lost a corm to pirates and a ruppy to lolfrigs, and decided to try something different: my punisher, fitted out in the style I now call the Asshat Brickbat. What followed was a killing spree.

http://ilaw.killmail.org/?a=kill_related&kll_id=14638905

Wolf couldn't kill it. Firetail couldn't escape. My Brickbat busted minnie ass like wiffle balls all over Siseide. I do want to say thanks to the minnies we killed, though. Good sports about it.

Oh, and I have rekindled my love for the Punisher.

OMG Promo!

2012-09-15T12:32:00.001-05:00

So, Blink has taken over Eve. I admit that I am a Somer Blink addict. My corp seems to have similarly caught this affliction, and now during our nightly roams it is common to hear that single word that derails comms for the next five minutes: Promo!

I can't complain though. Blink has funded my pvp, gotten me a carrier and a dread, as well as a few other choice items I would not have otherwise. So, in the absence of good solid pvp, Blink has taken over Eve.

Drought

2012-09-01T10:41:00.001-05:00

So, I've been a bit quiet lately. This is partly because school started back up and I have far less free time. This is also because very little of note has happened.

We still go out in fleets, but the choices seem to be roam around and sigh in frustration at the uncatchable shit, or suicide into the massive LNA fleet du jour. Sadly, we start off with the former and end the night with the latter and groan at the Minmatar's proclamations of superiority.

I have been reading other blogs and getting a feel for what is coming, but, at this point, I don't see any of it honestly mattering. Honest, good, amazing fights are what I want. What I get is far short of that mark.

Can I realky blame LNA for having more numbers? Can I blame them for using them? Can I blame them for not feeling like they should gimp themselves? No. No, I blame Inferno for making this an ISK printing machine. I blame the "crush them" attitude it engendered.

Anyway, I'll keep hoping for a better FW, but, the current iteration, and possibly the next, give little hope for a return to pvp being the real focus of fw.

Post-Exodus

2012-08-25T15:49:00.001-05:00

So, I am a little late posting this, but better than never.

Recently, an asston of peeps fled Amarr militia to go seek greener pastures. Some were not surprising (Nulli, Fweddit). Others were (FATE, Moar Tears.

What remains is a large chunk of 24IC, newcomers Agony, a rough collection of small corps I hadn't heard of until this week, and old friends TMFED and I.LAW. (If I left anyone out, well, oops.)

So, outnumbered: check.

So, what sort of prospects do the Amarr face? Well, oddly enough, there have been several good fights. On the other hand, several roams have ended with disappointment at the ridiculous amount of stab/cloak/mwd shit out there. Few engage, most flee. It doesn't feel like we are down and out.

Of course, LNA and company do occasionally bring lolwtf fleets, but, it looks like fights will not be going away and that is what's important, really. Not sov, not LP. Blappin shit in the face. That's what it's about.

Retrospection: I.LAW, FW, KotMC

2012-08-18T13:12:00.001-05:00

I came to FW back in 2011, early in the year. My corp in null-sec was breaking away from TNT and moving elsewhere, so a lot of people began looking for something new. I had a RL friend in KotMC, so I put in an app and moved the three ships I still owned down to Amarr.

KotMC was a warm and inviting atmosphere and I gave RP a try. PvP was essential to the corp and in this way, I managed to make friends with Shalee, Almity, Eran, etc. When KotMC fell apart, I wasn't sure where I was going or what I was going to do.

Shalee and Eran extended an invitation for me to join the fledgling Imperial Outlaws as a Director. I am a bit of a narcissist, and the idea of helping shape an FW corp from the beginning appealed to me. As our starting roster began to fill up, I knew we had a great thing going. Almity, Eran, Shalee, Phione, Kato, Czech, etc. And Sab0tag3, who will probably be KoS forever. We wanted to do things differently. So we did. A year later, we're in the top 900 all time corps on battleclinic. We consistently win fights. We've gone up against TEST. And most importantly, we have fun. I am very proud of what we've become.

Flash to the present.

In the post-Inferno world of FW, a lot of people seem to have begun to fixate on the economics of it all. They fixate on LP and ISK and some mythical concept of money=1337 skills. I am one of the poorest bastards in Amarr militia, btw, so I must suck at EVE.

The latest news in FW is that Fweddit is Caldari and Moar Tears will be too. Admittedly, this puts the rest of us in a position some might call dire. I personally feel that it is only dire if you care about sov or ISK. If the goal is to have fun, well,then the situation need not be dire at all.

The Joys of Tier 4 or How I Missed the Party and Went Broke

2012-08-12T22:46:00.000-05:00

So, I'm sure a bunch of you have already read about Amarr's slightly abortive run at T4/T5 from that unassailable pillar of journalistic integrity, Susan Black. Well, my story is a little different, largely in that it is true.

I found out about the cashout about 48 hours before it happened. I was at work for around 20 of those and asleep for about 10. I was at work when Amarr hit T4. I came home to find us bouncing back and forth between T3/T4. Naturally, I tried to cash in as much as possible. However, I only had 80 million ISK to use as capital, and LP cashout does require initial investing. So, I managed a miniscule cashout overall. I missed the party. RL sucks sometimes.

A few things worth noting, though. Nulli basically pulled a null-sec move and said, "We got what we wanted." and bounced out. Can't blame them and I am not surprised. Most folks I talk to are already sick of this plexing bullshit.

Second thing of note: all the minnies ever talk about anymore is ISK. There is a reason for this. They can't brag about thier combat victories, because they're too busy carebearing to have any. They can't talk about anything but carebearing because that's all they do anymore.

Me, well, I may have had a disappointing payout, but whatever. Only reason I am even talking about this shit is to counter other posts. Truthfully, Amarr would rather pew pew than give a fuck about plexing.

Symbiosis vs. D*ck-Stomping

2012-08-12T00:43:00.000-05:00

Lately, a conversation or two have caused me some concern.

There are those in Amarr FW who have voiced a desire not only to win, but to damage the minmatar to the point they stop logging on. This was not said in a joking manner but in a very serious discussion. He was not alone in this viewpoint. I can only surmise that there are similar individuals in the minmatar faction.

This blog is not meant to be kind or gentle. It is meant to be crass. So, my response on voice comms was calm and measured and fair. Here, well, not so much. If you, the reader, hold the above opinion, please try to remember that this is internet spaceships and if you all rage on me, not only will I not give a fuck, but I will take it as a compliment.

That out of the way, here is my response: Are you fucking serious? If, per chance, we were able to stomp minmatar dick to the point they need prozac to continue living, what then? Shoot gallente? Fuck that. We're Amarr. We shoot minnies. Gallente are just a side of chicken with my juicy fuckin waffles. (For those who think chicken is the main event: you are crazy and I cannot help you).

The reality is, FW is a symbiotic system. It is a disequilibrious system in which each side strives to win, but for the most part is best when near a dynamic equilibrium. Those are fancy ways of saying that FW is best when both sides are out shooting each other and are relatively equal in power projection. Amarr NEEDS Minmatar, and vice versa.

So, while I enjoy killing them in space and find several to be absolute douche-canoes, I understand intrinsically that stomping thier dicks TOO fiercely and savagely is counter to my desire to continue ROFLstomping them in space. Blow up thier ships. Don't destroy thier desire to play.

This message brought to you by Nicolai's Methamphetamine Lollipops. Now in exciting Strung Out Strawberry!

Today's Patch

2012-08-08T23:15:00.000-05:00

So, I log on today to the sound of lots of praise for the new patch. Let me go ahead and add my own.

Nicely done, CCP. Not that any of you wonderful peeps read my shit. But, still, thanks. You managed not to piss off any of the people I talk to on a regular basis with a patch. That's an accomplishment. So, I'll cover a few highlights and then get on to making fun of something, b/c that's what I do.

Big thumbs up goes to the new fittings rollover mouse thingy. Not b/c I needed to be able to see it when I roll my mouse over but because there's finally a place you can read the range of your missiles. Why this didn't happen sooner is a complete mystery to me, but, it's here now, and I am pleased. Which is what CCP cares about...me being pleased. *rolls eyes*

Frigates got repurposed? I'm not sure how I feel about this, actually. I mean, on the one hand, mining frigates were pretty much pointless. On the other hand... now I see these Tormentors and Slashers everywhere. WTF? Stop it.

Apparently, some modules got love too? The T2 armor plates are finally worth using, and as usual, the price tag has skyrocketed. Sell orders upwards of 9 million have appeared in Jita. The ECM t2 mods are still not significantly better than their meta 4 counterparts however, and all my ECM homies are sad pandas now.

Anyways, I guess overall I'm saying good job. CCP managed not to make me cry.

Now, can my Kitsune get some love?

Pve Pwnage, Blog Dramas, etc

2012-08-03T23:03:00.001-05:00

So, I missed a lot while I was away. Nulli Secunda arrived. 30 some odd systems went vulnerable. Amarr took Kourmonen (this made me smile while also making me sad, since I wasn't here for it).

While it sounds like I'm beating a dead horse repeatedly in the head with a baseball bat, I am still shocked at how strangely carebearish FW has become. There's still the crazy chestbeating. But, now it's about PVE shit. This just saddens me. I had a local-trolling conversation with SilenceIkillyou earlier (I am certain I mispelled that name, but whatevs). He made some statements (mostly lol statements, I imagine) about Huola's major selling points. All of these were financial ones. When did that become EVERYTHING. I mean, honestly, when did fights become unimportant and LP become everything? I spend 90% of my time broke as hell, and I don't mind most of it because I'm getting kills and flying around in fleets loving the hell out of it. Carebears everywhere nowadays. It's an infection! Like Herpegonosyphillitis of the earlobe, but worse.

In the realm of the more hilarious, Susan wrote a blog post that was ludicrously funny (to me).
TROLOLOLOL

This blog made me smile. Seriously. And for good reason. It makes reference to Amarr FW being fweddit's nerd paradise. Then further down it states fweddit has had little to no impact at all on Amarr FW. Which is it? Contradictions abound. Then there's a false dichotomy where Nulli's arrival can only result in two possible outcomes (come on! You talk about Locke and shit but don't remember basic logical fallacies?).

There's some garbage about Minmatar being awesome or something, and some statements about Amarr having no credibility, which is HILARIOUS. Really, I don't get why people got mad. This is obviously a joke post, right? RIGHT?

Anyway, so, Shalee Lianne wrote a response that highlighted some of the same silliness I just did, and so, Susan responded with a funnier response: WAAAAAHHHHH

I died a little inside. She was being serious? Times like this, I'm just stoked to be a troll. Susan, darling, just calm down and laugh more. Further, be a troll. Wear it with pride. Don't deny it. I don't.

Long Time, No Post

2012-07-31T11:18:00.001-05:00

I'm taking this moment to say "Sorry" to all my readers (yes, like, all twelve of you). I haven't written in a little while and I didn't even give any sort of warning ahead of time. I probably should have. For those who weren't in the know, I have been out of town for the past week or so. I headed out to San Diego for a wedding and have been so busy going from one thing to the next out here that I hadn't gotten around to sitting down and writing anything at all. Now I'm sitting in a hotel in Los Angeles watching the Olympics. Women's soccer.

So, I logged onto Eve last night to discover the Amarr have been VERY busy while I was away. A gazillion vulnerable systems, and last night, we took Kourmonen. Holy shit. Of course this would happen while I was away. So, in addition to explaining my absence, I felt I should go ahead and say good job guys. I am certain the Minmatar will try to cheapen it and say it's because of some sort of null-sec assistance. My response is: pfttttttt!

Anywho, I'll be back on Eve more here in a few days. Keep fighting the good fight.

Carebear Stare!

2012-07-21T10:24:00.000-05:00

Seems nowadays, whenever we go out fleeting, it is either a draught or a rorrential fuckin biblical flood. There's no middle ground. Last night, we roamed and roamed and found about jack shit as far as war targets. When we do encounter them, it is either one or two lonely targets or an omgwtfbbqfleet of epic proportions. This is pretty rare nowadays. Seems like the minnies have been replaced with carebears who do nothing but run missions in bombers and vigils in search of magical LP. What happened to you guys? Seems like you all sold out. You turned into squishy cuddly carebears who only seem to wanna fight about twice a week. Stop that carebear crap and come play FW like a boss. Actually pvp.

Egghelende

2012-07-15T10:12:00.002-05:00

Last night, whilst trolling the wonderful Late Nite guys who seemed to think camping high sec gates was better than fighting our gang, Silence was nice enough to tell me and Almity that, by virtue of our living in Egg, we can't comment. Well, apparently, I can, because I am. Some folks seem to think I.LAW's move to Egg was some sort of retreat. Not really. It is a very short trip to Huola. In fact, I spend very little time in Egg. Most of my time is spent in fleets down by Kourm and as far away as upper Metro or Kurn/Sahtogas. I am out in fleets looking to fight minnies. I was out doing that very thing last night. Sadly, they seemed more interested in ganking haulers on the Otelen gate. So, what's my comment? Well, apparently the LNA peeps think that if you live in a system, you aren't supposed to leave it. Hence why I seldom see them further than 4 jumps from Huola. Get out more, my agoraphobic friends. It is amazing what happens when you do.

Clean Out Yer Ears

2012-07-11T16:43:00.002-05:00

So, there is apparently some confusion on the Minmatar side. I figure I'll use this opportunity to try to make things less, well, confusing.

Susan Black recently reported that Amarr were going to be ditching and fleeing over to the Caldari Warzone. Well, she's half-right. Which I suppose is an improvement over her usual accuracy. Susan's Inaccurate Post

What's actually going to happen? Well, my corporation, Imperial Outlaws, will be switching to Caldari Militia in an entirely financially motivated move. We will not, however, be moving to the Caldari/Gallente warzone. Why? Well, because, that would be silly. We'll stay down here and continue to do what we always do, except we'll be getting paid better. So, again, since it's apparently still unclear, we'll be staying in the Amarr/Minmatar warzone.

Susan, in her usual, fair, balanced, and non-chest-beating way, posted a wonderful summary of last weekend in which Minnies hit T5 and cashed in for LOL-ISK. (Lame-sauce Weekend) Of course, it left out the ROFLSTOMPING that they'd been getting in Late Nite TZ, which is really funny, since they're Late Nite Alliance and I hardly ever see them anymore during their eponymous time zone. Should they consider changing their name to Late Dock Alliance? Or perhaps, Let's Not Attack. They could keep the same ticker then. Lame Nerds Alliance? Interestingly, the highlight of MY weekend: Bahamut's Archon did not make it into her weekend summary at all! *GASP* So much for honest journalism. I mean, my writing is totally biased and slanted, but, that's totally intentional and I don't think I ever stated otherwise.

Actually, I'm mostly appalled that her description of the weekend mentioned nothing about fighting at all. It was all about ISK and LP and how the Minmatar are totally better than Amarr because they are making more money. I lol'd in my cheerios. Then, of course, there's the mention of how Goons didn't help them make T5 this time. Then I had to stop laughing. You guys aren't serious, right? You're fucking kidding me, right? This is a joke, yes?

Allow me to explain why this "the goons didn't do it" line is a load of horse shit. Okay, so, the Goons dump loads of LP into the system. The Amarr struggle to take these systems and drop to T1. The Minnies sit on T3-T4 and think they're the ones making it happen. Meanwhile, they cash in their LP occasionally for ISK. The Goons back out of the minnies. The Amarr make some gains and drop Minnies to T2-T3. Now, here's the thing. The Minnies ALREADY HAVE A MOUNTAIN OF LP at this point. So, of course, by dumping LP into the system, LP you already had, and upgrading the majority of systems YOU ALREADY HAD, then yes, T4 was easily maintainable. Combine this with the Amarr steadily running dry on ISK and losing their desire to even care anymore, and yes, the Minnies gained T5, while piggybacking on the massive inroads the goons had already gained them. Sorry, Minnies, but you did this BECAUSE OF GOONS.

Well, not entirely. You also did it because most of us figure, why take a system and give you more LP to take it back?

Which brings me to my next point: Poetic's Suggestion.

Take a moment to read that. It's interesting, and frankly, it makes my response much more understandable. My response: Fuck that. Oh, and clean out yer ears.

We don't want your self-imposed reset. We'll take back the warzone when we're good and ready. And clean out yer ears. Why? Because there's more mention of us fleeing to Caldari warzone. I'll say it again: WE'RE STAYING, just with different LP store and uniforms.

Now, before the almost certain round of "You mad, bro?" comments, I'll simply say: yes. Totally. I'm fuming. I'm gonna blow up in a fit of rage and stab 47 koalas to death. And then poo on the Liberty Bell.

Of course I'm not mad. This is a game. And I am totally a trolling bastard who likes to go off on rants. However, I do feel part of what I do is to dispel bullshit. And believe me, folks, there's no shortage of that around here.

The Minnies and Thier New Groove

2012-07-08T07:47:00.001-05:00

These past few nights have been great. The Minnies have unleashed thier grand new strategy: running full speed into a brick wall repeatedly. I get online a bit late in the US TZ. Around 9-10 CST. I usually play 2-4 hours a night. I have gotten 84 kills already this month. My efficiency for July is over 99%. Why is this? Well, lemme tell you. The first reason is a little system called Arayar. It went vulnerable and the Minnies tried weakly to capture it. Our fleet kept crashing them and blapping what we could. And they kept coming, haphazardly. Eventually, they brought a rather large force, and, yet again, we bitchsmacked the hell out of them. Then, last night, in Kourm/Kamela/Kam, shit got real. We had a rolling fight on Kourm/Huola gate that left me exhausted. They just kept coming and we just kept swatting. Fweddit lost a lot of thrashers. The Minnies lost cruisers, bcs, a domi, a heretic, and others. It was glorious. So, I want to say, thank you Minnies for the delicious kills. I also wanna give a special shout out to Kevin, a neutral in a 3.4 billion isk scorp navy who generously allowed us to blap his brains out on Kourm gate in Huola. I made 120 mil off of you, and my stats for July are now way in the green. Much love. http://ilaw.killmail.org/?a=kill_detail&kll_id=13924545