An example of the modern migration towards venues that are more gastro than pub, The Mall Tavern carries it off with aplomb. It’s been a pub since 1856, but 2010 was the year that the Perritt Brothers gave it a serious lick of paint and got Jesse Dunford Wood to magic up a menu.

There are two main rooms on the ground floor, a bar area with bank seating, which becomes a restaurant area at busier times, and the main dining room, fronted by a full height orangery-esque window and decked out with reclaimed Victorian furniture and obligatory chandelier. Upstairs is a private dining room, outside a lovely little oasis of a garden. It’s a modern classic and well turned out, but far from without some quality quirks. A vintage glass whiskey dispenser hangs merrily above the bar, the garden is surrounded by plant pots that take the form of coronation mugs, and big curiosity cabinets hug the walls above the dining tables. But perhaps the real draw card is up the stairs, following the signs for the “Kitchen Table”.

The clue is in the name – this is a table in the kitchen. Eating here is a full on experience. It has to be booked in advance, but you walk through kitchen itself, get a cheerful hello from the team, and saddle yourselves down at a wooden table right in the thick of the action. A low slung carpet light hangs above; this is nothing like the fusty chefs’ tables at some restaurants. The menu is different to the main restaurant, with Jesse and the team serving you up their favourites, regularly accompanied by a background of disco tunage, and there’s even a bell on the table provided to ring for when you’re keen for more. They take bookings for as few as 2, for a special date (or a business meeting with a meat cleaver nearby) and as many as 8. And there’s a door that says “Whodunnit?”on it. What more could you want…

Back to the main restaurant, and onto the menu. In short, anywhere that serves gourmet Chicken Kiev (or Kyiv as they say here) and homemade Rolos is fine by us. It’s best of British classics with a charismatic twist, wonderfully done. The real draw is the Sunday roast, rated as London’s finest by the Roasted Sundays gang.

In the summer get here early for a spot in the garden and you’ll be more than set. All in all a fine spot to come for a hearty meal and a jolly good time.

The first of its kind, a GLP interactive review. Fill in the blanks in the comments if you’ve got the knowhow…

This review is incomplete and I’m sorry about that, I really am. But not to worry, it’s all about sharing now isn’t it? Collaboration. Community. So what I thought I’d do, no, we would do, if you’re pinterested, is write the review together. Like when Kofi Annan got the muppets to all sing the Alphabet song. Exactly like that. So, I’ll write the bits I know about and leave gaps which you can fill in using the comment box that the they tell me is located due south of this article. Remember Due South? God I loved that show.

-§-

The gentleman on the door looked like a Victorian convict. Charm wasn’t going to work here. Fluttering eyelashes were a no go. I considered thrusting my emergency pair of breasts forward, but decided against it. He might have had a cosh about his person. In the end my friends and I gave our names and joined the queue along Clarges Street. A man in an impossibly soft shawl-collared cashmere affair arrived, looked at the queue, snorted in disgust, gathered something leggy and blonde onto the back of his scooter and disappeared in a cloud of dust and cologne.

Eventually we were seated in a booth by the window and were glared at by those outside waiting to come in. The rest of the interior was part chalet, part diner – bespoke made luminaries hang, oak beams beam, copper wall mounted coat rails are trenchcoat ready. Apparently there’s the biggest lobster tank in Europe in the basement – and no you can’t pick your victim.  We ordered cocktails. I can’t speak for the others, but the martini was as clean and as strong as a freshly bathed Taylor Kitsch.

The waitress, with the assuredness of a house games mistress, talked us through the menu which consisted of three things. A lobster (broiled, grilled, or broiled then finished on the grill), a lobster roll, or a burger. I ordered the first, but I hear the others are ___1___.

Eating lobster can sometimes be a tricky business. It can be slapped down in front of you angry looking and impenetrable. You’re handed the sort of implements you’d expect to find in a Spanish Inquisitor’s pencil case and left to wrestle with it.

No such problem here. Within minutes of its death, my crustacean was put in front of me freshly broken up and utterly available. Even the claws were pre cracked, though actually this ended up being a little vexing, since one was cracked too far along and it didn’t come with a cracker thing (technical term) to do the honours myself. But the meat was perfect and could be doused in melted butter that came in a little boat. It was a perfectly indecent drooling, dripping gustatory orgy. The creature came with two additions. Chips, that were lovely, and a salad.

Photo from The Londoner

I sat back, removed my bib (oh, they provide bibs, did I mention?) and surveyed the disjecta membra of the meal. Replete, but not engorged, I asked what was on for pudding. Again, the options were limited. Either a sort of uncooked cheesecake or ___2___. The first was a paper pot of sweet gloop, shot through with vanilla. A casual assembly but it hit the spot.

In summary, it’s lobster and it’s Mayfair, and at around £20 for food—not including drinks, though why wouldn’t you?—it’s worth it. We’d only have spent the money on ___3___.

Open Monday to Saturday, 12 to 10:30pm (last orders).
Closed on Sundays and Bank Holidays. No Reservations.

By Oliver Ray

Our criteria were: inside the M25, outside the inner London boroughs, worthy of a day trip, and all the usual GLP qualities. Here are the results.

West:

Santa Maria Pizzeria, 15 Saint Mary’s Road, Ealing, W5 5RA, Tel: 020 8579 1462

Widely reputed to be London’s very best pizza joint, these guys keep it authentic. Napoli style. A lovely white frontage and a period window shows you the way to a tiny inside, within which clever table placement keeps things on the cosy side of cramped. The walls are decorated with black and white photos and the odd canvas of colourful art, but the real star here is the food. The pizzas are ridiculously good,using authentic ingredients, and the key is the dough – which the guys work hard to get elastically perfect. It’s a busy spot but well worth the trek.

Dolls House on the Hill, Harrow (inc Headstone Manor / Harrow Musuem)

Harrow on the Hill is one of those places that looks like Britain does in the mind of a dreaming tourist – all Hogwartsy and resplendent in bold brick academic buildings (those would be the school’s) and weatherboarded rickety houses. A little way down from its most famous educational seat is Dolls House on the Hill. It’s part quintessential English tea room, part quirky caff, all good. It’s girly, but charming – polka dot table cloths, quotes written on the apex ceiling, that kind of thing. Cakes are the speciality, and they are indeed special. Make a day of it and head to the nearby Harrow Museum at Headstone Manor – a moated timber frame manor house dating from 1310. That’s fully old school.

Thanks for the tip off: Vivienne Yip

Stein’s Bavarian Beergarden, Richmond Towpath, 55 Petersham Road  Richmond, TW10 6UT, Tel: 020 8948 8189

It’s amazing what you can do with a wooden shack. Apparently Richmond has a higher than average German population, and what we know about the deutsch is that they like bloody massive glasses of beer whilst sitting next to rivers. Stein’s delivers on these fronts. Not so long ago this site was a dilapidated old wooden kiosk. Reinhard, who also heads up Anglo-German architecture firm 3S, stepped in to rebuild the site entirely, giving it a full modern, wooden clad, makeover. The result is one of the most stunning and different places to enjoy a pint, or a litre for that matter, in London. Steins are dished out by bright young things in token lederhosen – but this is no underground beer hall with a band from Croydon doing a German accent and throwing bratwurst at you; here weeping willows overhang the wooden benches as the river slips by and the beer slips down. Wunderbar.

East:

The House Mill, Three Mill Studios, The Miller’s House, Three Mill Lane, Bromley-by-Bow, E3 3DU, Tel: 020 8980 4626 (The House Mill)

This is sort of two venues in one – one to look at (Three Mills Studios) and one to go in (the House Mill). First, the studios. Being from Kent an oast house is a familiar sight. If you’re not from Kent, you may be thinking what the funk is that cyclinder of brick with a sail on top. Well it’s an oast house, and it’s how they used to dry hops in the old days. And there’s one of Britain’s finest examples in the Lea Valley, East London. The Three Mill Studios themselves are a film studios, playing host to television’s finest including Ant & Dec Saturday Night Takeaway and Footballer’s Wives. Next door, in the House Mill, you will find the largest tidal mill still in existence in the world (though it’s not milled since ze war). Dating from 1776, the grade I listed building is more than a little bit special. Guided tours of the mill are offered for £3 for 45 minutes. The House Mill is open every Sunday from May to October from 11am – 4pm and on the first Sundays in March, April and December, the last tour is at 3.30 pm. And, crucially, the Miller’s House Café is serves light snacks and refreshments.

Trinity Buoy Wharf / Fatboys Diner, Trinity Buoy Wharf, 64 Orchard Place, Canning Town, E14 0JY. Tel: 020 7515 7153

Trinity Buoy Wharf is a lot of things, but uppermost amongst them is an arts centre and the home of London’s only lighthouse. What was once a workshop and area for experimentation in navigation (hence the lighthouse, built in 1864) which was originally given its starter signal by a certain Henry VIII in 1514, is now something of a workshop and area for experimentation in all manner of cultural exploits. There is street art, with tours, the tiny Faraday Effect museum, a container city, sculptures, the ‘Longplayer’ which is a never ending piece of music being played within the lighthouse, and a whole host of constantly changing temporary art and multi media exhibitions. Once that’s sufficiently scrambled your mind, it’s time to descramble your stomach, which is where Fatboy’s Diner comes in. It’s an original 1950s American diner, with views of the lighthouse and over to the O2 Dome on the other side of the river. They go in hard for all0American favourites, from signature Fatburgers to soul quenching milkshakes. Check out the 360 panorama on their site.

Brick Lane Music Hall, 443 North Woolwich Road, Silvertown, E16 2DA. Tel: 020 7511 6655

Not, as its name would suggest, in Brick Lane – indeed that’s where it started off, but Brick Lane Music Hall is now in Silvertown which is better explained as the area around London City Airport. Standing alone is a former church that has been amazingly converted in to Britain’s only dedicated home for music hall.  Music hall is a a peculiarly British type of entertainment, most popular between 1850 and 1960. It’s a mixture of songs, comedy and variety acts, which used to take place in pubs, but then got so popular they built music halls out the back. You could sit, eat, drink and be made merry by the entertainment laid on. Television, cinema and concerts saw its demise, but the Brick Lane Music Hall has upheld the tradition. There are matinees with afternoon tea and evening shows with a three course dinner. There are traditional music hall bills and plenty of brand new material. A truly unique place for truly unique entertainment.

South:

You Don’t Bring Me Flowers, 15 Staplehurst Road,Hither Green, SE13 5N, Tel: 020 8297 2333

So named after the Neil Diamond song, this little corner of Hither Green combines florist and café, and is swimming in charismatic detail like weatherboarded walls, a big pinboard of cards, all kinds of art all over the place and general paraphernalia galore. We’ve often thought that florists and fancy dress shops must be the amongst the happiest places to work – no one goes to either in a bad mood, save for a funeral wreath – and these guys certainly live up to that. It’s set over two floors, with the upstairs like a living room for the café side of the bargain and downstairs the florists. Tea comes in old school teapots and cups, and the food selection is predictably delicious. Particularly great is the iced sliced lemon cake.

Thanks for the tip off: Chas. Early,

Café St Germain, Crystal Palace, 16-17 Crystal Palace Parade, SE19 1UD. Tel: 020 8670 3670

A bit of Paris in the Palace. Crystal Palace that is. Café St Germain has been here for donkey’s years, or âne année as they might say here – well, since 1997. But it feels older, and it’s become the real heart and soul of the community here. Inside it’s a treat, wooden indulgence all over, French photos on the walls, smart marble brasserie tables, and a tickle of scene setting music in the background. As you’d expect the coffee is formidable, and they serve up a mix of continental and English breakfasts, and specials every day. Not at the same time, though we’re sure they would if you asked nicely. There’s a heated patio outside for a post of alfresco, and the Paris feel is completed with a view of the Crystal Palace antenna – the area’s very own Eiffel Tower. Once you’re done head over to Crystal Palace Park for a look at the famous dinosaurs.

The Ivy House, 40 Stuart Road, Nunhead, SE15 3BE. Tel: 0207 277 5522

We love pubs with stages. This a pub with a stage. In this case it’s a wonderful ballroom with a stage from the 1920s with gold lamé curtains. There are three large rooms and a garden, making this pub something of a whopper. But it still has an amazing community feel – there’s always something going on, whether it’s film nights, music and acoustic nights quiz nights, or the odd boot fair thrown in there for good measure.

UPDATE: Since posting this we’ve found out that the Ivy House has closed due to threats of redevelopment. Help save it here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/211251488989675/

Thanks for the tip off: Sally Grant

North:

Mandir Temple, 105-119 Brentfield Road, Neasden, London NW10 8LD. Tel: 020 8965 2651

There are some buildings in London that are just beggar belief. Most, in our humble view, were made before WWII. The Neasden Temple, as it’s known most often – because because the full name BAPS Shri Swaminarayan Mandir is less easy to tweet – was created in the 1990s… in India. Whilst it was assembled here, the largest Hindu temple outside of India was actually created over a mere 3 years by master craftsmen back home, then shipped over in parts to be assembled in its new home of Neasden. It’s an utterly incredible space, rich in ornate detail, replete with its towering white pinnacles, smooth domes and intricate marble pillars, all based on ancient Vedic principles of art and architecture. It plays host to not only Hindu events but is all kinds of others, including multi-faith stuff. But just as a pure, spectacular, unexpected place to visit, it’s hard to beat.

The Boogaloo, 312 Archway Road, Highgate, N6 5AT. Tel: 020 8340 2928 ‎

A musos pub if ever there were one. Whilst that can sometimes lend itself to a pretentious crowd, on the whole it seems to work out ok at Boogaloo. You can’t miss it, it’s a bright red triangular fascia on a corner near the merrily be-titled ‘suicide bridge’ in Highgate, which fronts a fairly substantial pub behind. The walls are covered with photos of musicians old and new, mostly old – it seems everyone who’s played a guitar or who wants to has been here at some point, and the odd quote is fixed up here and there too. Head all the way through and you’ll find a fairy lit courtyard with some comfy furnishings. A big draw is the juke box, for which an album must be at least 10 years old to qualify (assume therefore that 5ive has now made the list) and where competition for pound nuggets is tight. They also run vintage clothes markets on Saturdays.

Thanks for the tip off: Oliver Brignall.

Muna’s Restaurant, 599 Green Lanes, Haringey, N8 0RE. Tel: 020 8340 8411

How many Sudanese / Eritrean restaurants have you been to this week? This is an East African experience like no other, and Muna herself makes sure you have a good time. The interior is decked out in all kinds of Sudanese artifacts, with a tranquil little garden at the back. Food comes on the traditional injera, a sort of big bubbly pancake that you tear and fold around communal portions. It’s a very social eating experience, and one that takes a little bit of skill and a fair few paper paper napkins to clean up after if you’ve not done it before. The food itself is all kinds of flavours you may not have got your hands on, literally, in such combinations before – like aubergine salad, fish stew, puy lentils, cardamon and cinnamon, as well as lovely more familiar beefs and rice. Top it off with a Ceremonial coffee in a pot like you’ve never seen before, and you’re laughing. A heads up that the service can be a little inconsistent, but that’s not why you’re here – and when it’s good it’s great.

Honourable mentions:

West:

The Musical Museum, Brentford. The world’s foremost collection of automatic instruments, like Wurlitzers and little musical boxes and stuff. Has a tea rooms overlooking the river.

East:

The Vanbrugh: Greenwich. Great pub named after one of the greatest men ever. Fact.

Black Lion, Plaistow. Proper boozer.

Abbey Mills Pumping Station, West Ham: ‘The Cathedral of Sewerage.” A Byzantine masterpiece; rarely open but utterly spectacular.

South:

La Capanna, Cobham. Lovely wooden beamed Italian restaurant.

The Montpelier and Back Room Cinema, Peckham. Cracking pub with a tiny cinema out the back.

The Old Police Station, Deptford. Do-it-yourself art centre in, err, an old police station.

North:

The Old White Lion, Finchley. Big friendly local.

The Royal Standard, Beaconsfield. For a shade beyond the M25, one of the oldest and most wonderful pubs in all the land.

That’s  all for this week – should keep you going for a while. If you’ve got any more great little finds to share, let us know in the comments. Follow us for more on Pinterest, here or Twitter, here.

Queen of Hoxton rooftop, 1-5 Curtain Road, Shoreditch, EC2A 3JX. Tel: 020 7422 0958

Queen of Hoxton have got rooftop revelry down to a fine art. Commanding an outpost that sits right on the border of the City and Shoreditch, their mahoosive terrace has a great vista over this part of town. They keep it fresh, hosting regular rooftop cinema events (starting again in May) and they’ve just given it a timely spring revamp, adding a new bar, some crazy graff, and rumours of a hot tub bubbling. If the weather’s good this spot’s hard to beat for an after work drink or date for that matter.

Learn to cook a green Thai curry with Montaz the Amazing

Thai green curry cooking with Montaz this Saturday 21st April: The Amazings serve up the life skills of older folk as activities for you to get involved with and learn from. Montaz knows his onions, and his coconuts, and will give you a masterclass in preparing a top-notch green Thai curry. You’ll walk in fresh as a bamboo sprout and walk out fed, skilled up and proud. Highly recommended.

RIB Thames Trip, Boarding Gate One, London Eye Millennium Pier, Southbank. Tel: 0207 928 8933

Sightseeing can be dull sometimes. But sightseeing on a speedboat is a different kettle of fish. See the sights at 35 knots per hour. Speed dating indeed.

Kayaking at West Reservoir Centre, Castle Canoe Club, The West Reservoir Centre, Green Lanes, N4 2HA.

Kayaking in the West Reservoir (which is ironical North London) – as if a date weren’t potential for that sinking feeling already… Enough of that negativity, head over here for something you’re both really going to remember, and get in a kayak shaped boat. All welcome, and you get a free trial to get you started. Oarsome?

Learn how to be a Cowboy or Cowgirl, Circus Space, Coronet Street, N1 6HD. Tel: 020 7613 4141

Ever since Toy Story graced our lives, everyone has secretly wanted to be Woody. And now finally, we can. Learn lassoing, whip cracking and knife throwing at Circus Space near Old Street roundabout all in a day’s work. Perfect dating skills.

Trip to Eltham Palace and Gardens, Court Yard, Eltham, Greenwich, SE9 5QE. Tel: 020 8294 2548

This is a special trip for sure. Only 30 minutes away from Charing Cross. A glamorous 1930s Art Deco mansion in a medieval setting with 19 acres of beautiful gardens to wander around for all you lovers out there. Back in the day, this site was also the childhood home of Henry VIII. Old School. Be sure not to miss the magnificent Hogwarts-esque Great Hall while you’re there.

Visit Mudchute City Farm, Pier Street, Isle of Dogs, E14 3HP. Tel: 020 7515 5901

London isn’t the first place you associate farms with, but there are actually a fair few in the city – mostly dotted around East. The biggest is Mudchute, a full 32 acres of countryside in the middle of the Isle of Dogs. Were it not for sky being scraped by the nearby Canary Wharf monsters, you’d never think you were in the city. Alongside the standard chickens, goats, cows and sheep, Mudchute rock a few llamas too, or half a Pushmi-pullyu to the littl’ns. The café here is also particularly good, and it’s all easily accessed on the DLR. Admission free.

Sing a Long to ‘Grease’ at Prince Charles Cinema, 7 Leicester Place, WC2H 7BY. Tel: 020 7494 3654 ‎

A cinema date with a twist. No snogging in the back row this time though folks. Because you’re going to need those vocal chords working at full pelt. Fancy dress. T-birds. Pink ladies. Heckling. Sing-a-long lyrics on screen. You get the picture. Grease is the word. Next date 28th April. Who knows, maybe “You’re the One That I Want” will finally work out a treat.

Horse Riding in Hyde Park, Hyde Park Stables, 63 Bathurst Mews, London W2 2SB. Tel: 020 7723 2813

Horse riding in Hyde Park, next to the Serpentine Lake on a beautiful spring morning doesn’t get much more picturesque. And to all the fellas in the room, pull this one off and you may just come away looking like a stallion, lest you’ll be having a ‘mare. Ahem.

Tour the BBC, various London locations.

The Beeb is a British institution. And now you can be in on the drama too. Go behind the scenes. Check out memorabilia from the different shows. And maybe sneak into a celebrity dressing-room or two.

That’s it for now, follow us for more on Pinterest here, or Twitter here, or head over to DoingSomething to find yourself someone to do all this fun stuff with here.

Crocodile, wildebeest or locusts anyone? It’s like The Lion King turned into a restaurant (where the circle of life comes to an abrupt culinary end). ‘Hakuna matata’ clearly didn’t quite work out. With dishes and décor from literally the four corners of the earth, you won’t forget this gastronomic adventure in a hurry.

Started by Bruce Alexander in Jan 2000, Archipelago strives to take diners on an adventurous culinary journey without trying to gross people out. Although they serve some somewhat exotic delicacies, this is not the Bush Tucker Challenge and we can happily confirm you will not be plated up any eyeballs or testicles. In fact no offal is to be found on the menu – their ingredients are all organically reared without any help from growth hormones and chemical additives or other such bad stuff.

Archipelago is most definitely one of London’s most exotic and unusual dining destinations. As famous for its décor as it is for its menu, the dining room is packed full of peacock feathers, palm trees and artefacts from all over the world. There’s a sort of ‘Zen den’ downstairs, and every corner of the interior is filled with the likes of miniature Buddhas (not covered in hair), wooden parrots or bamboo trellises.

Signature meals, including seared zebra, kangaroo fillet and African crocodile bites, are offered alongside more conventional dishes of chicken and fish and exciting vegetarian choices. But it’s not novelty grub at the expense of flavour – the kangaroo and zebra we had were genuinely delicious. Start your evening with a cocktail or two in the bijou ‘Peacock Lounge’ bar. Apparently some even have 24crt gold in them. As you do.

Thanks for the tip off: Dave Foot, Rick Elmos, Ramin Beheshti and Grazzie Bell.

So it’s about time for some lesser-known marvels to take centre-stage. Waiting in the wings, here are 19 thespian haunts to wax lyrical about… and if we’ve missed any of your favourites, stick them in the comments.

Central:

Donmar Warehouse, 41 Earlham Street, Seven Dials, Covent Garden, WC2H 9LX.

Okay. Okay. Technically the West End we admit. Not ideal to fall at the first hurdle. But we had to make an exception for the Donmar. There’s more drama going on here than in Jedward’s dressing room. Never so fine an hour as when Chiwetel Ejiofor donned Othello’s dancing shoes.

Thanks for the tip off: Sue Bell.

North: 

King’s Head Theatre, 115 Upper Street, Islington, N1 1QN.

We’ve reviewed this bad boy before. And we’ll do it again. This intimate space has previously been everything from a boxing ring to a pool hall and, judging by its quirky interior covered with photos, many a famous face has graced its stage.

Thanks for the tip off: Annette-superninja Teaispointlessbutcoffeeisgreat KenobiBowie Davis (Annette your parents took some real liberties naming you).

Almeida Theatre, Almeida Street, Islington, N1 1TA.

One of the better known theatres amongst the North London theatrical Massif. The Almeida is a handsome old bird, rejuvenated with a facelift back in 2003; 19th Century grandeur meets 21st Century chic.

Thanks for the tip off: Margarida Naves.

Jacksons Lane, 269a Archway Road, N6 5A.

Jacksons Lane is a multi-arts venue based in Highgate, right across the road from the underground. Its artistic programme is grounded in innovation showing everything from contemporary circus to physical theatre, cabaret and dance, with the occasional high profile comedian gracing the stage. Every summer, the venue plays host to Postcards – a festival of circus, cabaret and extraordinary performance. Featuring the likes of Mooky, Marawa the Amazing and Briony Kimmings, it’s fast becoming a key event on the London arts calendar and the venue of choice for those in the know.

Thanks for the tip off: Ade Berry.

Little Angel Theatre, 14 Dagmar Passage, Off Cross Street, Islington, N1 2DN.

This little pocket rocket is one for the littl’ns. The master puppeteers here know how to pull the audience’s strings. And unlike other marionette shows, theirs won’t leave you wanting to Punch Judy in the face.

South:

Young Vic, 66 The Cut, Southwark, SE1 8LZ.

The Young Vic needs little introduction. It’s the younger, edgier, more hipster offshoot of the much celebrated and never overrated Old Vic, a stone’s throw away. Always good to support young actors as well. Even if you fancy just a drink in a lively bar after work, you can do much worse than the Young Vic. Comes in to its own in the summer months on the outside terrace.

The Union, 204 Union Street, Southwark, SE1 0LX.

This fringe stalwart has a delightful cafe attached to it. Easily missable, you won’t regret stumbling across this underground den of theatrical endeavour.

Thanks for the tip off: Alastair Brookshaw and David Westerby.

Polka Theatre, 240 The Broadway, Wimbledon, SW19 1SB.

Another one for the hobbit folk. Luckily their cheery and colourful productions are far from diminutive. From storytelling sessions to in-house productions, there’s more happening here than on Sesame Street. Plus there’s a playground. Jackpot. And a cosy cafe. Rollover Jackpot.

Theatre 503, at The Latchmere, 503 Battersea Park Road, SW11 3BW.

There’s nothing peripheral about this fringe theatre above The Latchmere pub in Battersea. It’s small but, like Chuck Norris, often packs a big theatrical punch. Infamous for pushing provocative and fearless new writing, much again, like Chuck Norris.

Thanks for the tip off: Nina Coglin and Vanessa Wilkins.

The Brockley Jack Studio Theatre, 410 Brockley Road, Brockley, SE4 2DH.

With only 50 seats, this place puts the ‘little’ in great little place. It’s a chameleon of a performance space so don’t expect simply theatre. There’s film, comedy, cabaret, writer workshops and much much more.

Thanks for the tip off: Chas. Early and Gareth Thesaurus Ellis

West: 

Tricycle Theatre, 269 Kilburn High Road, NW6 7JR.

The quaint little Tricycle doubles up as a cinema as well. Facebook fan Denise also recommends ‘Small and Beautiful’ restaurant next door. Just the ticket.

Bush Theatre, 7 Uxbridge Road, Shepherd’s Bush, W12 8LJ.

Don’t call it a comeback. The Bush Theatre moved from the pub to the Shepherd’s Bush library up the road and hasn’t looked back since. Revamped and reloaded, new playwrights still love sprouting up in its fertile soil.

Finborough Theatre, 118 Finborough Road, SW10 9ED.

If there are two things we love at GLP towers, it’s wine and theatre. Here you’ll find both free flowing in abundance for The Finborough Theatre shares its bed with the Finborough wine café.

Thanks for the tip off: Rupert N H Munday.

Pentameters Theatre, 28 Heath Street, Hampstead, NW3 6TE.

The pub/theatre love affair continues in the shape of the Pentameters Theatre, nestled above The Horseshoe public house in the glorious heart of Hampstead village. This intimate 60 seater is slightly rough around the edges but, as ever, that’s half the charm.

Lyric Hammersmith, Lyric Square, King St, W6 0QL.

We’re not great at maths at GLP HQ but there’s one sum we can do: divinely beautiful theatre + idyllic rooftop garden = great little place.

Puppet Barge, The Puppet Theatre Barge, opposite 35 Blomfield Road, W9 2PF.

All aboard the floating theatre. Now that’s not something you get to say in every review. Anchored at lovely Little Venice. 55 seats. Puppets. Kids’ classics galore. Like JC, this intimate theatre walks on water and is just as miraculous.

East:

Theatre Royal, Stratford East, Gerry Raffles Square,
 Stratford,
 E15 1BN
.

This is one of the more grandiose theatres on our list, dating back to 1884. Known for its musicals and comedy as well as its new theatre productions.

Thanks for the tip off: Nina McMillan.

The Space, 269 Westferry Road, E14 3RS.

This converted church is an excellent adaptation. More than just theatre, it’s a self-described ‘performing arts’ centre, where you can watch plays but also attend workshops and do all things artistic. And, as if that wasn’t enough, it nestles up to the delightful Hubbub cafe bar next door.

Arcola Theatre, 24 Ashwin Street, Dalston, E8 3DL.

Theatre is like film in real time. And there is no better place to witness it than in the form of our grand finale: the Arcola Theatre. One of the most (if not ‘the‘ most) well-respected small theatres in London. Now there’s an accolade to write home about.

Thanks for the tip off: Nici Virley and Stephen Campbell.

I’m afraid that’s our curtain call folks. But before we take a bow, pray tell, which is your favourite little theatre? Drop us a comment below. Or follow our charming chirping on Twitter.

Old or young, the deeply held desire to be one of the cool kids at the back of the bus never really leaves you. Nestled in a surprising location, just 100m north from Deptford Bridge DLR, is the chance to go back to those hierarchical days and live it the way it should have been first time around.

Not long after turning the corner onto Church Street, an imposing number 30 red double-decker bus bursts into your line of vision. It stands out from its surroundings as if it has crashed into the Bird’s Nest Pub next door and crashed into your consciousness.

A warm welcome greets you the minute you step aboard and discover the retro fitted diner that lies within. Chatter fills the air as people take the staircase to the top deck, settle into their cosy seating and decide what on earth to indulge in first.  You see, with a 2am bar license, cocktails, and pizza, like mama used to make it, the Big Red is far from an ordinary bus. From our experience, we can heartily recommend the Pizza Italiano and Pizza Flamenco.

If that is not enough to tempt, after your meal walk across the flower-edged outdoor terrace to the 50 foot graffiti-covered trailer to watch a film or even take in some live music. Afterwards, wander back to relax on a big comfy sofa under the canopy sail. Mystic Meg can rest easy, she won’t be needed  to see where we will be, mojito in hand, come summer.

Owner John’s dream was to create a quirky part installation, part pop up, great bus- based dining space. He has more than succeeded. On a site with plenty of room to grow and endless plans afoot this year to expand the Big Red experience, this bus, thankfully, isn’t going anywhere; so make it your final stop.

Boris/Ken take note: this is how London transport should be.

By Tanith Heap.

“Even if happiness forgets you a little bit, never completely forget about it.” Jacques Prévert

So comes up one of the results of a Google search when trying to work out the name of this little bar in Hoxton square. It is a ‘blink and you’ll miss it’ cocktail joint, nestled secretly below a cafe. You could easily mistake it for a dive, but as you walk down the stairs towards a sign saying ‘bar’, the smell of incense hits you awakening your curiosity for what might be down below. You don’t get incense in dives.

Stepping in, a dimly lit bar bathed in warm red and white lights greets you. Clientele are eagerly chattering away with cocktails in various stages of consumption in front of them. A lively hum of conversation fills the room as waiters speed by delivering drinks and food. The bartenders, dapper young chaps, are shaking away the drinks combined from the many bottles of spirits decorating the shelves on the wall behind them. It is small, but yet comfortable – though it gets busy so booking in advance is recommended.

What’s quite striking about the venue is that it doesn’t have the upmarket polished ‘faux Speakeasy’ look that most cocktail bars seem to be going for these days, but still maintains a quaint old-worldliness about it. It unashamedly looks put together with comfortable chairs and cushions surrounded by exposed brickwork walls licked with a red paintbrush. Music, mainly various forms of jazz, flows out of the speakers combining itself into the laid back hustle and bustle of the atmosphere. The customers are a mix for the area that straddles itself between Shoreditch and the City. The drinks menu is small but hints to works for all tastes. Prices are on average with most cocktail places in London, but the results are high quality concoctions making you want to complete the whole menu.

In times where everywhere with vodka and cranberry juice can call themselves a cocktail bar, Happiness Forgets sticks out by a mile with their quality of drinks, laid back atmosphere and friendly vibe welcoming all who want to relax in this cosy cavern.

By Naz.

A thousand years after the Great Pyramid at Giza was completed, a document we have come to know as the Ebers papyrus was written. It is one of the oldest known medical texts in existence. If you want to see it you have to go to Leipzig, which might seem like a bit of a stretch, but you can get there and back in less time than it takes to get a ticket for Da Vinci at the National which rather puts things in perspective.

The Ebers—named for Georg Moritz Ebers, a staggeringly bearded Egyptologist—is the first text to mention enemas. This all proves a couple of things; That a) in some ways, the ancient Egyptians were an incredibly advanced people and b) give it a thousand years and people get bored. One assumes they also invented the hose pipe, the filter funnel and the phrase, “Just what the hell do you think you doing down there?”

70 million cups of coffee are drunk in Britain per day. And most of it is mediocre. Pick an orifice; the effect will be much the same. And in London, though there are a number of good places in central and out east, these are often full of people who tweet astride fixie bicycles. This irritates and counteracts the otherwise pleasant aperient effect of whatever species of coffee you’re drinking.

Which is why it was nice to hear about quite a new place to the southwest, in the verdant suburb of Putney. Artisan has been open since October and has already been getting good press from those blogs that like to talk about beans. I took Tom, because he knows more about beans than I do.

The place is light and airy, and funky light fittings crowd the red ceiling. The chairs are taken from the set of Bladerunner and could be comfier. A large counter laden with all kinds of appetising comestibles takes up one corner. On this also sits the ‘sexy’ (according to their website) La Marzocco FB/80. That’s a coffee machine. We tend not to sexualise kitchen appliances, but its got all sorts of knobs, handles and squirts a variety of fluids and, hey, it’s the 21st century. At GLP, we just want you to be safe.

I ordered a black coffee, and Tom had a flat white, because occasionally he is insufferable. It was excellent. I could launch into an encomium, describing how the perfect crème broke into an archipelago of aerated caramel islets bobbing across liquid that was as richly hued as a rare beetle’s carapace etc etc. But basically, it’s good. Very good in fact. So good that the owners, Edwin and Magda, could be a bit smug. Though they aren’t, because they’re too busy and too nice. Tom’s flat white was also excellent. He used an expletive to convey his pleasure. (It was ‘fuck’. Can we say that here?)

Since we were there, it seemed rude not to sample the food. A sausage and caremelised onion sandwich hit the spot and so, apparently, did the BLT. Their muffins (American—blueberry and raspberry) were extremely edible. And, if you like your lapsang, they do a nice Russian Caravan blend.

There are lots of little shops and cafes in Putney. You’ll see them one month and they’ll be gone the next. Fugacious. Ephemeral. Forgettable. Behind the still drying paint and carefully chosen furniture they just aren’t that good. Artisan is a nicely positioned local serving great coffee. And actually, that’s enough. They deserve to stay.

By Oliver Ray

When the kebab shops and rollerdiscos of Dalston get too much, jangle the doorbell at Fee Fee la Fou HQ for a brief escape into wonderland. A newly opened island of colour on Bradbury Street, this is quite a find. It could go one of two ways – hideously zeitgeist or endearingly quirky; fortunately it’s the latter.

Essentially, FFLFHQ is a curiosity shop full of things made by artists and designers, lovingly curated and presented by shopkeeper and artist in residence, Fee Fee la Fou. Inspired by ‘The Shop’ – Tracy Emin and Sarah Lucas’s project space – as well as an exhibition at the Museum of Everything curated by Peter Blake, Fee set out to create a place to bring curious products to curious people, and it does so rather brilliantly. Fee sells her own work and the work of other artists; everything is hand picked based on the things that inspire her – the circus, neon, unrequited love, Aesop’s fables, and camouflage, to name but a few.

The result is that this doesn’t feel like just a shop. It feels like the inside of someone’s bonkers dream. From the elephants on the wallpaper to the specially made helter-skelter, every corner of the shop is filled with something of interest. Everything is for sale and everything has a story to tell. Fee Fee la Fou herself is on hand to give the run down of where each item comes form and what the hell it means. You’ll find everything from stunningly appliqued cushions, limited edition prints, interspersed with rainbow coloured jewellery and the odd retired carousel horses. GLP favourites were the range of bright and barmy teapots studded with characters, each unique and so intricately made you could spend an hour studying them. Perhaps over tea. If you really wanted to. FFLFHQ takes ‘retail is detail’ to some kind of ridiculous new level – head on down.

By Caroline Collinson-Jones