Gainesville Goodies

My Cheeks Hurt

2014-03-06T20:40:00.001-05:00

Hello! I am in South Florida for Spring Break with Morgan and we decided to make another video. Enjoy.

P.S. I will eventually catch up on my Bachelor recaps. Whoops.

The Bachelor: Week 5&6 Recap

2014-02-27T11:35:00.000-05:00

Week 5:

Looks like we are staying in the western side of the world for one more week. Pabs took the ladies to Vietnam, which is ironically the "perfect place to fall in love." Aren't they all? Two one-on-one dates and one group date this week, and plenty of drama.

Renee's One-on-One:
Momma Renee was the first this week to go on a date. I was super excited for her date as she is one of my favorites this season. She was as giddy as a teenager going on her first date, and it was precious. Pabby escorted Renee through the streets of Vietnam...on an oversized stroller bike thing. Probably another clever plan for Pabs to put off having a conversation as long as possible. I wasn't super impressed with the ingenuity of this date, but there is also the possibility that this was one of their only options. I don't know much about Vietnam, but "tourist attraction" surely didn't come to mind. Then again, I thought the same about Seoul. I'm ready for some green grass and open spaces, please. Or a beach. Anyways, JP takes Renee to a local dress shop where Renee gets fitted for an authentic Vietnamese dress. Then she randomly disappears for a while and returns in a long blue kimono (is that the right word?). Pabs is blown away by how gorgeous she is, and while her dress wasn't one that I would buy, she did look stunning in it.

Dinner goes well, and that's about it. The two send off these little lantern things into the river which was really cute and reminded me of the Disney movie Tangled. Great movie. Unfortunately, Renee didn't get the kiss she has been DYING for, but she did get the rose which is just as good (maybe better).

Nikki's One-on-One:
Oddly out of place, the group date was saved for last and Nurse Nikki was the second to go on a date this week. This date was one of those cliche "face your fears" dates. Boo. Nikki and JP repelled down this cave known as the "Hell Cave." Nikki put on her weird headband across her forehead, and was talked into (kissed into) repelling much faster than Chelsie was talking into bungee jumping. Or at least it was edited that way. To be honest, I probably would've been slightly freaked out myself. Repelling down some random cave in Vietnam held up by Lord knows what kind of equipment. Definitely worth a five minute temper tantrum.

For the evening portion of the date, Nikki rocked a little black dress, and JP took notice. The dinner conversation went well and Nikki showed her nice, caring side. I can't decide if I like her or not. I think it just depends on the day, she's somewhat unpredictable with her moods. JP listened well, or at least it looked that way. More than likely he was just probably alternating between staring at her and attempting to translate everything in his head. Whatever he translated must've been good, because Nikki gets the rose and secures another week on the show.

Group Date:
Another random boating adventure, this time in nice brown muddy water. Mmm. Clare and Pabs share a boat as once again Clare has no friends in the house. Red flag, buddy. JP turns into his other self when he's around Clare, and NO ME GUSTA. He purposely "falls behind" and pulls his boat off to the side of the river to kiss Clare. Again and again. The editing made it look like the girls saw them, but JP swears that they didn't. I believe the girls. After that awkward boating adventure, JP leaves his one-on-one with Clare and rejoins the group. For a while. The groups wanders into a native's home and share a rather quiet meal together. Naturally, Clare is right next to Pabby and can't get through the meal without throwing a mini tantrum about the food. For 31 years old, she acts about 13.

The evening portion of the date is where things got interesting. Despite his extensive time with Clare during the day, Pabs pulls Clare away first and takes her to his personal suite for a swim in his pool. Apparently this is another one of Clare's fears? Cold water? Juan Pablo thinks it's super cute though. OF COURSE. Pabby also spent some time with Andi and Sharleen. And by "spent time," I just mean made out with. I just want to reach into the TV and punch him sometimes. We are five weeks in and I am still waiting on a meaningful conversation between him and one of the women. I understand it's reality TV, but you're supposed to be finding your future wife here! I sure would want to have a conversation or two before asking someone to marry me. Unless of course it was Ryan Gosling. It's occurred to me that perhaps Pabs isn't looking for a "mom" for Camila, but rather just a fun trophy wife/playmate type thing. Minus points.

Clare gets the group rose. *Glares from the other girls.* So, the night is over, right? Wrong-o. Clare pulls a Courtney and sneaks over to Pabby's room later that night and asks him if he would like to join her in the ocean for a late night swim. Keep in mind, Pabs has every right to say no. But, he says absolutely and the two frolic into the ocean to conquer yet another one of Clare's ridiculous fears. Now, what happened in the ocean has been the main topic of Bachelor conversation for the past few weeks. Some say, Clare included, that all they did was kiss. The majority of viewers suspect something more happened because following their ocean excursion, a great tension between the two of them was formed. At the cocktail party, JP has a conversation with Clare revealing that he regrets what happened in the ocean. So, what happened? Clare is taken completely by surprise and rightly upset as Pabs kind of blamed her for the whole thing. Juan Pablo has this weird way of saying really mean things in a sort of nice way to make the girls think what he wants them to think. I refuse to attribute it all to the language barrier. I think he's kind of a tool.

Clare comes back into the cocktail party wiping her eyes, blaming it on allergies. Good cover, babe. The rest of the girls know something is up because JP is kind of on edge. It's no secret that Clare is his number one chick at this point, so the rest of the girls are confused as to why there is this tension between them. Renee finally gets her kiss tonight. Although, at this point Pabs was probably just trying to keep his mind (and lips) occupied to avoid Clare. So I feel bad for Renee because I'm not sure if the kiss was genuine or not. She was overjoyed though, to say the least. Sassy Sharleen gets a few moments with Pabs before the rose ceremony, and spends most of them crying. She is an emotional roller-coaster, and I want off the ride.

Danielle, Kelly, and Alli (who?) all went home after a very dramatic and emotional week. We are down to eight girls, of which I like maybe three. In the next couple weeks, I'm hoping for two things. 1) Sharleen finally cracks and goes home. 2) JP gets called out by one of the girls and maybe gets punched. That would be awesome.

Week 6:

FINALLY! A destination worth talking about. This week, we were in New Zealand. Trees, cows, blue skies...it doesn't get much better, in my opinion. Pabs had two one-on-one dates and one group date this week. While this week wasn't filled with quite as much drama as the last, there definitely were a fair amount of tears.

Andi's One-on-One:
Despite appearing to be a front runner from night one when she stepped out of the limo, it's week six and Andi is just now getting her first one-on-one date. At least it's in the gorgeous New Zealand. I definitely would've preferred that to Vietnam or Seoul. The two board a speed boat and quickly go zooming off into the distance. Juan Pablo decides he's had enough of the boating and he hops into the water with Andi and guides her through some pretty tight rocks to a waterfall. Rightfully so, she's a little freaked out at how they are literally having to squeeze and suck in to get through these rocks, but Pabs pulls out one of his catch phrases of the season, "trust me," and Andi gets over it. Andi is rocking a one-piece on this date which I give her MAJOR props for, because she actually looks gorgeous in it. After a standard make-out session, Pabs' other signature move, the exotic part of the date is over.

The couple (can you call them that?) share dinner beside a local geyser. Apparently that is romantic? From the beginning, I was just waiting for the geyser to explode...and it finally did. Pabs and Attorney Andi were drenched in water and their date had to be relocated to some random spot. Andi thought it was super romantic; I would've been pressed that my dinner was ruined. Not surprisingly, there isn't much conversation shared between the two, but nonetheless, Andi gets the rose. It was the swimsuit.

Group Date:
This group date was probably one of my favorites in Bachelor history. At least the beginning was. Pabby took some of his ladies to this giant hill where they all rolled down it in these giant inflatable plastic (?) balls. It sounds kind of weird and lame, but it looked like a blast. The girls were absolutely loving it, and Pabs was absolutely loving being surrounded by women in bikinis. Total Pabs move.

For the evening portion of the date, Pabs took the ladies to Hobbiton, where the filming of The Hobbit (Lord of the Rings) took place. My inner nerd was loving it. Each girl got their time with Juan Pablo, long enough to share a few kisses but short enough to keep Juan Pablo from talking. Apparently Sassy Sharleen made the best impression because she secured the group rose. My precious. Cass didn't make quite as good as of an impression because she was sent home prior to the rose ceremony. On her 22nd birthday. Pabs reason for sending her home was the standard "I don't want to keep you away from you kid for even one more day," but I think the true reason was more along the lines of "Oh my gosh, you're 22?! How did I not know this until now?? BYE."

Clare's (second) One-on-One:
Either the producers wanted the viewers to see significant camera time of Clare and JP following their controversial frolic in the ocean last week, or JP really likes Clare. Regardless, Clare was the first to receive the second one-on-one of the season. Clare didn't waste time before bringing up the infamous ocean; she was clearly looking for an apology. Somehow Juan Pablo mumbled his way into what Clare thought was an apology; I didn't buy it. There was no actual "date" that I could tell, just a lot of passive aggressive comment towards each other...and some kissing. Clare and Pabs' relationship (if you want to call it that) is just extremely confusing to me. No substantial conversations, just these weird looks at each other and a lot of physical chemistry. Although, at this point I suppose I shouldn't be surprised.

The evening portion of the date was spent at JP's place, on the couch "talking." I use quotation marks because I'm not sure if Pabs actually said any words in English, or if he just pulled the standard "Mhmmm....you're cute" lines. Pabs did request for Clare to get into some of his sweatpants so they can just "hang out and be comfortable." If that's not sending any different of a signal than a late night ocean swim...I must be crazy. Clare got the rose. Duh.

Kat and Chelsie were probably considered the "bottom two" this week, and it was Kat that ended up getting the boot. Chels is likely to be the next one out the door, provided nothing crazy happens next week.

The Bachelor: Week 4 Recap

2014-02-09T21:10:00.000-05:00

Hey guys! Apologies for my delayed posting of this week and last week's episode recaps. I've been super busy with school these last couple weeks and have two exams and a paper this week. Prayers please. That being said, here's the recap for week four!

The Bachelor: Week 3 Recap

2014-01-21T20:08:00.003-05:00

This week on The Bachelor...a 21 year old who hasn't had a date in three years gets a chance at love, we witness the most uncomfortable kiss in television history, and a first grade teacher brings out the claws over a coveted 1-on-1 date. Also, Chris Harrison causes quite the stir with his choice of shirt in the opening scene where he delivers the first date card. His color blocked button down was likely the most tweeted thing about the show, aside from the infamous kiss.

Cassandra's 1-on-1:

So after her slight meltdown last week before the rose ceremony, things take a 180 turn for Cassandra this week as she gets the first date of the week. Juan Pablo aka JP aka Pablo aka Pabs promised both her and Renee that because they are mommas, he would work very quickly to figure out his feelings for them so he doesn't keep them from their children if there is nothing there. This week, Cassandra was up to bat. The two drove off in Pab's signature Tesla before changing rides into a stylish Jeep type thing. Not really sure what to call it. As they drove around this gorgeous lake, Cassandra tried to guess their destination, and just as I said "the water" to the TV (Yes, I talk to inanimate objects), Pabs drove full speed into the lake. The car magically transformed into a boat, pretty cool I must say. Cassandra and JP zoomed around the lake, although the car camera shots didn't look like it was quite as relaxing of a ride as one may think.

Eventually, the boat car thing got boring because they boarded a fancy yacht for the remainder of their excursion. It didn't take long before the cliche jump into the water occurred and Cass and Pabs shared their first kiss. Cute. The evening portion of the date took place back at Juan Pablo's house where they cooked dinner together. For those of you that didn't know, Cassandra hadn't been on a first date in three years prior to her date with JP. Again, Cassandra hadn't been on a first date in three years! Can you imagine? The only reason I stress this is because she informed the viewers of this baffling fact over five times in her brief interviews as if it was something absurd. Hun, you're 21. You got pregnant at 18 and have a two year old son to be taking care of. Not particularly shocking. Anyways, I digress. Pabs showed off some of his sweet moves and danced with Cass in the kitchen, easing some mutual nerves. The rest of the date went off without a hitch, Cass got the rose, and JP listened very intently to everything Cassandra had to say. Or, he was just staring at her beauty. Probably the latter.

Group Date:
FINALLY. The soccer date I have been waiting for. JP doesn't have my heart quite like Sean Lowe does, but he did look rather dashing in his soccer uniform, or as my best friend Morgan would call it, costume. It's clear that Pabs was totally in his element, and it's really cool to watch. The girls would be competing against each other in a soccer game with JP as the referee. But, first, he was kind enough to practice some drills with the girls. It quickly became clear who had a soccer background, who was athletic, and who was hopeless. Southern belle Kelly was in the hopeless category, but she tried really hard, bless her heart. During the actual game, Sharleen got hit with the ball more times than a dodgeball player, even once by Pabs himself. I have a theory about the damages from the hits that I will share later. All of the girls played their hearts out, and even though the blue team lost, everyone got to stay for the rest of the date. Unusual.

Now, for the social mingling part of the group date, Andi and Nikki received honorable mentions in my opinion. Nikki and Pabs clearly have a very good connection, and he seems to be taking it slow with her which I actually see as a sign that he likes her a lot. Andi is very independent which I love, and so does JP. The two finally shared their first kiss in the concession stands at the stadium and I thought it was cute. She's still a front runner in my opinion, and I think Nikki is too. The real winner of the group date, and by winner I mean loser, is Sharleen. This girl. Her and Pablo spent their alone time in the center of the field, in full view of everyone. After some boring conversation, JP leaned in to kiss her and she pulled away. But then she came back and kissed him. I use the term "kiss" very lightly. It was the most uncomfortable, awkward, unnatural kiss I have ever seen, and everyone in social media seemed to agree. My theory that I mentioned earlier is that she got hit in the face one too many times with a soccer ball and the kissing circuit in her brain tripped up. I'm 99% sure Pabs wasn't feeling it either as he was like, "I like your shirt," which is code for "time to go back to my other girls." The rest of the women were pretty upset that Sharleen and Juan Pablo kissed in front of everyone. Wah. Nikki got the group date rose, which once again I was happy about, but I was pulling for Andi.

Chelsie's 1-on-1:

Prior to the reveal that Chelsie would be going on the last 1-on-1 for this week, Elise had a few things to say. Well, really just one. Elise could not talk about anything except for "how young Chelsie is" and how "JP doesn't want two daughters." Aside from her plain rudeness, I was mostly confused at how someone can be calling 24 year old Chelsie young when there is a 21 year old on the show! I swear Cass is lying about her age. Something doesn't line up.

Chelsie strikes me as a very down to earth, low maintenance type girl. Her and Pabs danced and sang to Venezuelan music in the Tesla on the way to their date. She didn't know any words, clearly, but still had a blast. The two stopped for some Venezuelan lunch, and Chelsie truly seemed to enjoy it. She's all about the food, and I'm all about her. However, Chelsie is not "all about" heights. In fact, she hates them. Good thing her and Pablo will be bungee jumping off a bridge today. When Chelsie found this out, she had a full fledged panic attack. It took her about seven minutes to decide to jump on the episode, although I'm sure it actually took close to an hour. After reassurance from Pabs such as "Just do it for me," (um no) they finally took the plunge. Cue standard metaphors as to how love is like falling off of a bridge. Spiderman style, Chelsie and JP shared their first kiss hanging upside down by their ankles. Super cool camera shot. Probably slightly uncomfortable, however, when you consider that the blood has rushed to their heads and their hanging by their ankles.

The dinner portion of the date was perfect. Pabs really seems to like Chelsie, I think, as he hasn't once mentioned in an interview how cute she is. Rather, he spoke about her easy going personality and maternal instincts. So, in my opinion, she's more than just a pretty face to him. The couple was "surprised" when Billy Currington showed up for a private concert. Chels and Pabs had fun dancing together, and they looked very natural. She received the rose and secured time in the future with El Bachelor.

"Cocktail" Party: On the morning of the cocktail party, JP snuck into the mansion and surprised the girls by cooking them a Venezuelan breakfast. He was excited to see the girls without their hair and makeup all done up. Sean did something similar on his season, and Catherine (his wife in a few days!) didn't even blink an eye when she had no time to get ready. A girl after my own heart. Southern belle Kelly was the first one down, accompanied by Molly, and was completely taken aback when she saw JP. She cowered away and covered her face. Not a good move if you can't see your potential fiancee without makeup on. Renee was an all-star and walked out with no makeup on and right up to JP for a hug. She's a mom, she has way more things to worry about than her hair and makeup. Pabs took notice and loved it. The breakfast went over very well with the girls; it looked pretty darn delicious on TV.

Juan Pablo cancelled the cocktail party and opted for a pool party instead. His thinking: see all the remaining in their swimsuits. The girls' thinking: show off my hot bod for JP. This is when the claws started coming out, with Kat hogging JP for chicken fights, Sharleen "kissing" him yet again in front of the girls, and Elise just being Elise. As I was watching the pool party, my main concern was not with the girls, but rather when this cold weather is going to leave so I can soak up my own rays! This polar vortex stuff isn't funny anymore.

Rose Ceremony: Christy and Lucy left us this week. I wasn't surprised about Christy, but Lucy's elimination did come as a surprise to me. I was almost positive I had seen more footage of her in previews of the season! I really thought she was going to be the cause of some drama among the girls. Turns out, she was really just a free spirit that didn't care much for clothes. I would've rather Pabs have kept Lucy over Danielle. Next week for sure this girl has got to be going home. Or Sharleen. That would be nice. Unfortunately, I think Sharleen and/or Clare are going to prove to be the dramatic women in the household. I'm not sure if I'm ready for all the claws to come out. That's when watching this show starts becoming emotionally draining.

It looks like the girls and Pablo Picasso pack up their things next week and head to the first destination of the season. The dates will be getting more extravagant, and the girls will be getting more and more unbearable.

My Top 5:

Chelsie
Renee
Nikki
Andi
Clare (although she seems a bit emotional)

The Bachelor: Week 2 Recap

2014-01-17T19:00:00.002-05:00

HOLA mis amigos. This week is the FIRST week of dates, which is really when the season STARTS. (I'm TRYING to write like JP tweets, with random and OBNOXIOUS capitalization. Bless his HEART.)

Clare's 1-on-1:
JP comes to pick Clare up in his awesome Tesla, and naturally all the other girls are jealous. They all follow the two outside and gasp, ooh, and ahh as JP blindfolds Clare and they drive off into the sunset. The viewers know from Sunday's extra episode that JP and Clare are headed to a "Winter Wonderland", complete with real (fake) snow. I have mixed feelings about the whole blindfolding thing. On one hand, it's romantic and I love surprises, but on the other (bigger) hand I think I would get carsick and probably ruin the Tesla's gorgeous interior. Luckily, Clare fared just fine and was giddy with excitement when they arrived to the date. JP piggy backed her across the snow and finally sat her down on the hill and removed the blindfold. Clare's reaction was precious and incredibly genuine. Her and JP frolicked through the "snow", ran through trees and slid down hills, or as JP would pronounce them, HEEEELS.

After a quick bout of ice skating, which Clare looked very out of place and not so graceful in, the date moved to the hot tub. Clare looked gorgeous in her bikini, and she snuggled up to JP to "open up" as all the girls feel they need to. Clare might have been a bit too open for date numero uno as she spent most of the time talking about her late dad, who was the "epitome of what a man should be." Also, she was massaging JP the whole time, which poor Crazy Amy did and she was sent home! JP must've liked Clare's touch better, because she got a rose. Just in time too. The first private concert of the season was starting. I hate that the girls still act surprised that they are a part of a private concert. That's ABC's signature move, ladies! However, I was surprised, and slightly annoyed, that the private concerts started on the very first date this season. Overall, I think it was a solid first date for this season. Clare did a great job of being herself; Juan Pablo did a great job of keeping the confusing accent and dialogue to a minimum.

Kat's 1-on-1: From a Winter Wonderland in LA...to Utah. JP sure has a variety of dates up his sleeve. Kat and JP board a private jet, and for whatever reason she thinks they're going to Miami. Really? Once again, I have mixed feelings about the whole private jet thing. Too loud and way too much turbulence for me. Or maybe I'm just really lame and old. Hmm. Anyways, JP disappeared (on a small plane, not sure where to) and returned in a flashy jumpsuit outfit with crazy neon colors and awesome sunglasses. He handed Kat a similar outfit, although much less material, and the two landed in Park City, Utah. Turns out, they would be starting this Electric Dance 5K. Now hold on just one minute. A 5K date? I would've definitely needed some prior warning that I would be running over 3 miles on my first date. And then I would have politely declined.

However, as the race started, it looked like an absolute blast! The running is more of a light jog with tons of pauses to just dance and have a good time. Yet again, an opportunity for JP to dance rather than speak. JP did know ahead of time that Kat loved to dance which is a plus as he has some pretty smooth moves himself. Naturally, the two found their way to the stage and led the crowd in one of the coolest raves I've ever seen. 5K aside, I would've 100% rather had this date than the lame Winter Wonderland. Kat gets the rose, and her and JP dance the night away.

Group Date: The first group date of the season...brace yourselves. The group dates always prove to be the most dramatic, and the most entertaining. On this date, JP took a group of girls to be a part of a charity photo shoot. Super fun, right? More like super funny. The charity that the photo shoot would be supporting was one I could get on board with: the adoption of dogs! And the models aka the girls posed with pups in some pretty interesting outfits. Notable outfits included a fire hydrant costume, a painted on dog, and cardboard signs. Now, to elaborate. Southern belle Kelly was sporting a painted on dalmatian? Whatever dog it was supposed to be, it was hilarious. She was painted head to toe in white and brown with a giant white spot around her eye. While other girls were dressed in beautiful dresses, sweet Kelly was a dog. She was a great sport about it though, so bonus points for her.

Undoubtedly the most controversy and drama came from the costumes that Andi and Elise were supposed to wear. No clothes, no swimsuits, just a piece of cardboard to barely cover them, that read "Adopt" and "Me" respectively. Naturally, the girls were stressing out about how scantily clad they would be, and for good reason. As a lawyer and a first grade teacher, posing practically nude on national television goes against everything they value and have worked for. Elise was quick and clever and traded her "costume" for Lucy's fire hydrant costume. Lucy is our resident nudist this season. Her job is listed as "free spirit", and she is every bit of that. Producers are clearly keeping her on the show to create drama with the girls. And cameramen are just begging to keep her around as long as possible. So, Elise was in the clear, but Andi was still stressing. JP came over to comfort her and informed her that he would also be posing nude in the photo shoot so everything was "allll goood." For whatever reason, this comforted her enough to convince her to do it. The three of them posed in the strangest photo shoot I've seen in a while. Quite the first date, eh?

As the sun went down, that's when things got interesting. Victoria was the star of the night, and not for good reason. It quickly became apparent that Victoria had one too many glasses of wine to calm her nerves. And as expected, she denied that she was drunk, insisting that "this is how [she] normally acts." Alright then. There was some provocative dancing followed by a quick exit to the bathroom. Here come the tears. Victoria was clearly past the tipping point as she sank to the bathroom floor and began to cry, whine, and yell. Renee, our resident mom, did her best to get Victoria under control and keep her from embarrassing herself any further, but she was beyond reason. Even JP tried to talk to her, and he too, came up empty. The night ended with Kelly getting the group date rose because she "was such a great sport", even though I thought Andi definitely was the best sport. But Kelly's cute too, so it's all good. Oh gosh, I sound like JP.

JP visited Victoria the next morning in the hotel she crashed at and rightly sent her home. Her apology, if you could call it that, was incredibly weak. As a 31 year old daddy, JP is long past the stage of drunk nights and immature girls. Byeeeee Victoria.

Rose Ceremony: This week's rose ceremony was uneventful, especially in comparison to last week's. We did find out however, on the group date, that Cassandra is also a momma. During the cocktail party, Cassandra had a mini meltdown about missing her son Trey, and resident mom Renee came to her rescue. JP also consoled her, telling her she was cute. Thanks for the kind words, JP. We lost Chantel and Amy L this week. Not too many tears, not too much drama. JP is now down to 15 women, a much more reasonable amount of women to date at the same time.

My Top 5:

Andi
Clare
Renee
Nikki
Kat

IT'S JUANUARY! (The Bachelor Premiere)

2014-01-15T16:37:00.001-05:00

Ladies and gentlemen, mujeres y hombres, we are back! After much too long of a hiatus (there was no Bachelor Pad this summer), The Bachelor returned with Juan Pablo. Someone on Twitter, probably Chris Harrison, affectionately named this month "Juanuary", as each and every week, viewers are "blessed" with two nights of The Bachelor. So, although The Bachelor technically premiered on Monday night, there was a "Behind the Scenes" look into Juan Pablo's life as well as the casting process of the girls that was broadcasted on Sunday night. You didn't miss much.

Oh, the Bachelor mansion. It is good to be home. After a quick introduction by Chris Harrison (my candidate for the next Bachelor), we are off and running. Juan Pablo (JP) gets some advice from former Bachelor Sean Lowe. There is the standard awkward "how to kiss girls" talk, just as Sean received last year from Arie. This conversation felt very forced to me as Sean and JP aren't actually friends and weren't even on the same season. Just a not so clever time filler. C'mon Elan and fellow producers. We couldn't come up with anything better? Sean Lowe stole the show in this segment and quickly reminded America that despite JP's adorable accent, he is and will always be America's best and favorite Bachelor. Yessir.

The Limos:
After another couple unnecessary bits, we are finally ready to meet the women. JP looks dapper as always, and apparently dapper enough to have 27 women rather than the usual 25. "Lucky" him. The first interactions are always very awkward as each girl often tries crazy things just to make a lasting impression on the Bachelor. This season was no different. One of the first girls that got my attention was Nikki, a gorgeous pediatric nurse that gave JP a stethoscope to feel her racing heartbeat. Cute, a tad sexy, but not over the top. Clare, bless her heart, stepped out the limo pretending to be pregnant. Now, as a father himself, JP handled the situation very well and played along until she admitted it was a joke. A very risky move, but Lindsay did something similar last season by showing up in a wedding dress and she made it to the final two, so maybe there's something to be said about being a tad crazy on night one. Keep an eye out this season for Clare.

I vaguely remember some mediocre piano playing as an intro, but I have no idea who it was. Either they were eliminated that night or they will be soon. When Andi, the final girl, stepped out of the limo, JP literally turns away at the sight of how beautiful she is. Now, prior to tonight I didn't think I was going to like her because her bio sounded like she was kind of a stuck up lawyer who was way too invested in herself and her job. However, she is absolutely stunning and they clearly have a connection. My fear that she might be this season's Tierra has mostly gone away and she is actually my front runner as of now.

Cocktail Party:
After meeting all the women, Juan Pablo comes inside and starts a dance party to break the ice. What a fun idea! The girls all clearly loved it, as it showcased his ability to let loose and just have a good time. Also, it allowed JP to dance rather than talk which is a bonus because his English is absolutely terrible. Settle in for a season of very little dialogue from JP. With a photo booth, and Kelly's dog Molly in the house, the girls seem to be having a great time.

However, the night is still young and everyone wants their time with JP. Amy aka Crazy Amy decides that it would be appropriate to take JP outside and showcase her masseuse skills. First of all, he's in a suit so there's no way this massage is actually enjoyable. Secondly, just no. It was so awkward to watch and JP was visibly uncomfortable. Needless to say, Crazy Amy didn't get a rose.

Lauren H., who looks strangely like Blakely from Ben's season, is just a mess. She literally cannot stop talking about herself and the breakup she so recently got out of. Despite her attempts to convince JP, the girls, and us that she has moved on, it's clear that she hasn't. Hang out in the real world for a while sweetie, reality TV is not the cure. I was happy to see her go home, for her own health, and for mine.

First Impression Rose: This season there is only Juan first impression rose. Get it? It's a pun. My last one for the season, I promise (False). Apparently the producers were no longer fans of multiple first impression roses, as seen on Sean and Des' seasons. When interviewed about the rose, some random girl said, "It's not just a rose. It's my future." Oh sweetheart, you are in for a rough season. As a shock to myself and most of America, Sharleen got the first impression rose. Probably in part because her dress was super risque and Juan Pablo pointed out it was "super cute." (Another fair warning...when JP doesn't know what to say/how to say it, he often resorts to "You're cute"). Sharleen has an extremely delayed response, and when she finally answers, she simply says "Sure." Weird. I'm just not seeing it, JP.

Rose Ceremony:
Chris Harrison reappears from the darkness to announce it is time for the rose ceremony. If you're ready, here's Juan Pablo. And if you're not, here's Juan Pablo. Nine girls will be going home tonight, quite a few! I was definitely appreciating that Kelly's dog, Molly, was part of the ceremony. Precious. Perhaps the best and only noteworthy moment of the rose ceremony was when Kylie misheard Kat's name for her own. Super awkward, but also incredibly hilarious. The best part is that she didn't receive a rose. See the clip below.

Overall, it was an entertaining first episode. Not quite on par with Sean, but I am looking forward to watching JP struggle with English the whole season and the girls continue to insist that his poor English, inability to communicate, and heavy accent is "so sexy."

My Top 5:

Andi
Renee
Clare
Nikki
Kat

The Bachelorette: Finale Recap

2013-08-06T21:38:00.001-04:00

It's here. It's finally here. Honestly, Desiree's finale couldn't have came sooner. This season was absolutely exhausting for me as viewer, especially towards the end. I don't particularly like watching TV and then going to bed emotionally drained from someone else's dating problems. Not normal. After last week, I was unsure that there was even going to be a finale, but after checking my TV Guide and seeing "The Bachelorette" for THREE hours, I confirmed one last time with Morgan and Lindsey for our girls night.

The episode begins with yet another interview with Chris Harrison. After many tears, dramatic pauses, and ridiculous questions from Chris, Desiree decided that she would like to have the rose ceremony and continue her relationships with Drew and Chris. The rose ceremony was awkward and hard to watch as she broke down in tears after mentioning what happened with Brooks. Although both Drew and Chris received a rose, I knew Desiree was far from choosing either one of the them as her fiance. Or so I thought.

Drew's Departure: As Desiree approached Drew for their "date", it was clear that she was completely closed off and they were heading straight for break up town. It was only a matter of minutes (on the show) before Des pulled the classic "I need to talk to you" line and Drew settled in for heartbreak. She explained that she didn't feel capable of loving him like he deserved to be loved. Drew was incredibly mature, receptive, and composed during this entire conversation, earning him more bonus points in my book. (As if that was even possible.) After a tough goodbye, Drew headed home to Scottsdale, where thousands of women were eagerly awaiting his arrival.

(If you didn't read this in the Spongebob narration
voice, we can't be friends.)

Chris' Date: So, I'm not entirely sure what switch this girl flipped overnight, but she was bright eyed and bushy tailed for her date with Chris. Like nothing ever happened. The two spent the day on a private catamaran in each others embrace. Desiree was her usual giddy, goofy self and it took me by surprise. ABC did some serious editing this season because these strong feelings for Chris were never this evident until now. Of course. Dinner, conversation, and the rest of the evening flowed perfectly. My skeptical glasses were definitely on at this point.

After spending the day with Chris, Desiree tells the camera, "How could I not have loved him from the beginning?" Hmm. Interesting. She decides that she wants Chris to meet her family. Bring on the brother. Chris is very excited and eager to meet her family and ask her dad for his blessing. Nate, Des' brother, grills Chris similarly to as he did Sean last season, but gives Des his approval in the end. Bravo. Des' parents are really quirky and at this point I decided that the two families would get along quite well, actually. Chris gets the dad's approval, and it seems like we will be moving forward with this whole process. Again, interesting.

Enter Neil Lane with his classic six gorgeous engagement rings. Chris is so excited and is 100% sure of his decision as he selects the ring for Desiree. I would be ALL FOR THIS if the whole Brooks thing had not gone down. I will try my best to support Desiree and Chris as I truly wish them the best, but it's just all a little confusing for me. Desiree looks stunning in her "final rose" dress, nothing new. She looks so happy to see Chris as he arrives, though he's looking rather nervous. He begins pouring his heart out as every proposer does and as he goes to get on one knee, Des stops him. Hold up. A fleeting moment of panic and excitement...quickly destroyed as Desiree just professes her love to him, clears up the whole Brooks thing (quite well, I might add) and gives him the go ahead to propose. More or less. She accepts Chris' proposal amongst tears with the words, "Yes. A thousand times yes." Beautiful, although stolen from Pride and Prejudice. Less beautiful. The episode ends and we arrive at the Live studio audience for the "After The Final Rose" show.

After The Final Rose: Desiree enters with the ring on her finger and a smile on her face. Chris congratulates her on her engagement, but wastes no time going into the tough questions. Brooks is the main topic of discussion, as he should be. Everyone was a bit confused how she could still pick someone after what happened with Brooks, and if Chris would trust her. She has nothing but positive things to say...so Chris brings out Brooks. Despite her claim that she was not nervous to see him, I immediately noticed a change in her demeanor. I could literally see her thinking as her eyes were constantly darting around the room. The conversation between the two is super awkward. However, Pro: Brooks cut his hair. Con: He didn't cut it short enough. Brooks leaves the stage, not fast enough for either of them I can imagine. For the rest of the show, Des just seems uncomfortable. Her meeting with Drew is nothing more than cordial conversation, though she did look more at ease with him next to her.

Chris comes on stage and the two make their debut as a couple. Yay. Their relationship looks a bit forced to me. I don't think Desiree had enough time to get over Brooks and fall for Chris, and definitely not enough time to get engaged. Heavens no. Chris tortures the audience with one final exit poem; I wouldn't expect anything else. I hope they stand the test of time and turn out to be as an adorable of a couple as Sean and Catherine, though that's shooting for the stars.

Undoubtedly the best part of the entire finale was the announcement of Juan Pablo as the next Bachelor! I am so pumped I can barely stand it. His season (I predict) is going to be absolutely hilarious, filled with adventures, and extremely entertaining. Word on the street is that ABC's website crashed last night from the flood of applications it received after announcing Juan Pablo as the next Bachelor. I believe it.

I will definitely be blogging about Juan Pablo's season, starting in January. Until then, keep an eye out for random posts, videos, and/or a new series on my blog! Thanks for going through this exhausting journey to find love with me!

The Bachelorette: Week 10 Recap

2013-07-31T15:22:00.001-04:00

Week 10

This Monday began the two part finale of Desiree's season as The Bachelorette. ABC advertised and promised that this would be the most shocking, drama filled finale yet...and they did not disappoint. However, they did leave the drama until the very end of the episode. Standard.

Drew: Drew and Des spend the day tooling around the island of Antigua in a sporty Jeep, stopping along the way to kiss. A lot. Drew is head over heels for this girl; he can't stop kissing her and saying 'I love you.' They attend a local festival with dancing, shopping, and awkward gestures from the locals. A local hands Des a heart made out of leaves or something weird and then proceeds to ask Drew and Des to kiss. Intensely. And then, he just sits there and watches. Creepy. The couple has dinner in their fantasy suite that Drew gladly accepted the invitation to. Drew talks of how excited he is to finally be able to say "good morning" instead of "good night." This kid really is precious.

Chris: Private island date. I knew it was coming. Although, this private island looked a little less than impressive. There was just lots of sand and not very many trees. As Des and Chris talked on the beach, I noticed that they were both squinting at the sun, but neither had sunglasses. Apparently, sunglasses are not allowed. That officially puts me out of the running for ever being on the show. At dinner, Chris presents Des with...another poem. I think this is poem number eight or nine. Enough is enough, buddy. Des couldn't care less though, at least it seems that way. She looks at him all wide-eyed as usual as he reads it aloud to her. They talk of where they would live if this whole thing were to work out, and Chris asks Desiree if she would be comfortable moving to Seattle. This is the first concrete discussion of plans after the show that I have ever heard. Some redeeming points to Chris to counteract his cheesiness. Just a few. Chris also accepts his invitation to the fantasy suite and the two spend the remainder of their evening in the hot tub, kissing and stuff. Eew.

Brooks: Here's where things get really interesting. Prior to flying out to Antigua, Brooks revisits his family to discuss some feelings and hesitations that he is having. Uh oh. Not a good sign. During his discussion with his mother and sister, he comes to the conclusion that he is not in love with Desiree, despite how much he wants to be, and will be breaking up with her when he arrives in Antigua. As we know, Desiree is in love with Brooks, (breaking protocol by telling us) so this is going to absolutely devastate her. Brooks talks with Chris Harrison and confirms his decision, though he was a wreck while discussing it. If he was this shaky and nervous while talking to Chris, talking to Desiree is going to be an absolute disaster.

And it was. As Brooks greeted Des, she immediately sensed that something was wrong. He led her to a bench where he began to try to explain what he was feeling, though he never said the words "I don't love you" or anything with the word "break up" in it. However, Des quickly put together the pieces and was crushed. As she should've been. The breakup itself took way longer than necessary and eventually got boring, in my opinion. I wanted to scream at Brooks to just leave already! Leave Desiree to cry and grieve. She needs to be alone and away from you to start the whole grieving and healing process. Having been in this almost exact same situation, I know how hard it was for both Desiree and Brooks. Many people just empathized with Desiree (which is fine and needed), but forget how hard it is to leave someone that you so desperately want to love, but just don't. Brooks made the mistake of staying with Desiree for way too long, trying to comfort her. That is not your place, bud! After what seemed like an eternity, Brooks and Des finally went their separate ways. Whew, that was exhausting.

So now what? Des was very much in love with Brooks, but he didn't feel the same way and left. In my opinion, after watching her get so torn up by Brooks' departure, there is no way that she can pick either Drew or Chris. It just wouldn't make any sense. So, for the first time in Bachelorette history, I think she chooses no one. If Brooks decides to come back for whatever reason, I think she would accept his proposal and they would both be making a huge mistake. I feel for this girl, I really do. Crossing my fingers for everything to turn out okay for her, at some point down the road.

The Bachelorette: The Men Tell All (Week 9)

2013-07-23T20:56:00.000-04:00

Welcome to The Bachelorette: The Men Tell All. Let's put all of the men that have been cast off this season in one room and watch them confront each other. That is, if their egos can all fit in the same room. Honestly, I was not looking forward to this episode. Two hours of drama is just not up my alley. That being said...

As the men are introduced, the loudest applause goes to Juan Pablo and Zak W, and the loudest 'boo's went to Ben and James. No surprises there. After a brief recap of the drama highlights of the season, the floor is opened up for the guys to discuss their feelings. Here we go.

Jonathan was the first to catch a little bit of heat for his fantasy suite opener and he quickly apologized for that and we all moved on. Lucky break for him. Bryan was the next to be put in the hot seat, though he was not present for the grilling. Coward. The general consensus among the men was that Bryan was not there for the right reasons and had absolutely no business going on the show with a girlfriend back home (even if she was completely psychotic.) Once again, agreed. Let's move on to the more interesting stuff please, Chris!

With Ben in the hot seat, things heat up. But, only slightly. He explains his less than graceful exit with saying that he had just been dumped and battered about huge things in his life for eight hours straight. The guy was bound to crack at some point, right? However, I wish he could've cracked a little sooner and high-fived Michael G...in the face...with a chair. Ben was the classic snake of the season that none of the other housemates liked. One could compare him to Tierra of Sean's season, but not nearly as bad.

James was in the hot seat for way too long. Honestly, looking back, the drama of this season was rather disappointing. The main controversy with James surrounded a conversation between James and Mikey in a limo. For more on the whole James drama, feel free to read my recap of Week 6. As he is questioned by Chris and the other men, James gets defensive instantly and starts talking really fast and stuttering again. I'll give this guy some grace, but America certainly did not. Life goes on after the show. There was no master plan to become to the next Bachelor; this guy just said the wrong thing at the wrong time in the wrong place around the wrong people. Amidst all of the shouting, pointing, and yelling, poor Juan Pablo is caught sitting in between Mikey and Kasey. Somebody get this guy a seat change.

Juan Pablo was next to be put in the hot seat, but for different reasons. That man sent the hot seat up in flames. So America, and the other guys, all have a crush on Juan Pablo. Literally no one had anything negative to say about Juan Pablo. He is the clear fan favorite...next Bachelor anyone? I'd watch.

Zak W is wearing the same outfit tonight that he was wearing on the night he was let go. Wait a minute, did he just come from Des dumping him? One would think so by how torn up over Des he still is. In a very creepy conversation with Chris Harrison, Zak reveals that he wrote a secret in invisible ink in the back of the journal that he gave Des. Very National Treasure of you. When Desiree arrives and confronts the men, Zak decides it would be a good idea to break out his guitar and sing Des a song he wrote for her...How did ABC let this happen? Aside from this just being a disaster in general, his performance looked a lot more like an audition for The Voice than a heartbroken song for Desiree. It was clear that she felt incredibly uncomfortable, as did everyone else watching that. He lost a lot of points in my book for that. Too desperate, bud.

The show ended with a three minute compilation of hilarious bloopers. I wish we would've watched two hours of that! Next week will begin the dramatic two part finahhhhhle (as Chris Harrison pronounces it). My prediction: Brooks leaves due to cold feet, Des is torn up and chooses no one. But, Brooks then realizes he made a mistake and comes back and they get engaged. Honestly, I have NO CLUE.

The Bachelorette: Hometown Recap (Week 8)

2013-07-16T20:46:00.001-04:00

Though it is rather obvious, I feel the need to mention that my blog template has once again changed. The template that I was previously using malfunctioned and I reluctantly switched to this current one. Although it is not my favorite, it does have a few cool features: A poll (be sure to vote before next week), a link to follow me on Twitter, and links to popular posts if you are looking for something additional to read. Hopefully all the recent switching isn't too crazy for you; I promise I'm done for a while.

Week 8: Hometowns

Hometowns! This week, Desiree got to meet the families of Zak, Drew, Chris, and Brooks. This was arguably the best week of hometowns this show has seen in a while, but it didn't go without its usual quirks and awkward moments.

Zak's Hometown: Zak was up first and he was visibly thrilled to be showing Des around his hometown of Dallas, Texas. Their date started with Zak telling Des about a dream that he had, a very confusing, strange dream involving Sno-Cones, children, and penguins. He then disappeared, leaving Des (and me) perplexed. Zak returned moments later in an ice cream truck...the family ice cream truck. He and Des would be serving Sno-Cones to an elementary school full of eager children. Absolutely precious. This date actually looked like a blast and Desiree was clearly enjoying herself and enjoying seeing Zak in his element.

As Desiree and Zak walked into his house, they were greeted enthusiastically by his family. His mom was adorable and I fell in love with her instantly. She was so welcoming to Desiree and so excited to meet her and get to know her. Definitely not the typical potential awful "mother-in-law" situation. The conversations between all of the family members and Desiree went seamlessly and the family concluded the evening with the performance of an original song written about welcoming Desiree into the family. With such a genuine family, I knew Desiree was going to have a terrible time sending Zak home, if it came to that.

As Zak said his goodbyes to Des, he presented her with a promise ring and told her that he loved her. Although Desiree couldn't say "I love you too" back, (or so we thought...) she expressed how touched she was by his gesture and kind words. Overall, this hometown date went as perfectly as possible, by the books.

Drew's Hometown: Welcome to Scottsdale, Arizona: home of one of the few men in the world that can rock a bright pink shirt. Drew and Desiree start the day off by picking up Drew's severely mentally handicapped sister and bringing her home to spend the day with her family. Drew's sister's reaction to seeing her brother is priceless. Though she cannot formulate words or much of anything, her screaming is clearly from excitement and she rushes over to give Drew a big hug. Desiree is touched by being a part of this experience and, with her loving reaction to meeting Drew's sister, she slips into the family perfectly from the very beginning. Upon meeting Drew's family, it's instantly clear that he comes from an incredibly loving family and they welcome Des with open arms. In her conversation with Drew's father, he shares with her that he has met an angel, his daughter. Des is brought to tears and tells the camera that she is "ready to move in."

Drew tells Desiree that he loves her, and boldly. Des' reaction is more passionate and receptive than when Zak told her, which places Drew in front of Zak for best hometown date.

Chris' Hometown: Remember earlier when I said despite the overall awesome hometown dates there were some awkward moments? Well, it's time. The time that Chris and Desiree spend alone is not awkward at all; it's perfect. They play baseball in his home field and have an absolute blast. The connection between the two of them is easy to see. Things don't get weird until Chris' dad takes Desiree into the basement for an adjustment. Whoa, back up. Even though Chris' dad is a chiropractor, I don't see any reason why showing Des his "skills" is necessary, especially on the first meeting. Strike one. It just gets stranger from here, as camera shots of Chris getting his nose adjusted, as if it's a daily occurrence, by his dad are shown. Strike two. Honestly, I just got some weird vibes from this family. There was nothing outwardly wrong with them, no fights broke out, but something just seemed off. I don't see Desiree fitting in as well with Chris' family as the others.

With a less than compelling exit, Chris slides into last place thus far.

Brooks' Hometown: There are few things that I really love about Brooks. Primarily, his sense of humor. He is incredibly witty, as shown on almost every episode this season. Des is really into him...really into him. Brooks and Des canoe in a local lake and despite taking water, they have an absolute blast. Brooks has had some reservations almost every week, and it's obvious that Desiree is ahead of him in the "feelings" category. He's hoping that talking with his family will ease some of his hesitance and help him move forward in the relationship. Upon walking through the doors of Brook's home, the two are greeted by an enormous amount of hugs, screams, and hellos. Also, everyone is wearing name tags. His whole family is hilarious; I love it. The conversations are very meaningful, but not many answers to the deep questions asked are shared with the viewers. Brooks seems to feel more confident after talking with his family. HOWEVER. He is the only one not to tell Desiree that he loves her this week. That's big. (Or at least in the past it has proved to be).

Rose Ceremony: Once again, we are shown an incredibly confusing interview between Chris Harrison and Desiree. I refuse to discuss it because honestly, I'm upset. The editing these past couple of episodes is terrible and really making me frustrated. As I watched the episode with Morgan and Lindsey, we all agreed that these new pre-rose ceremony interviews need to go. Stat.

Brooks is called first, followed by Chris. Despite his two strikes, he slides in and is safe. "The final rose...when you're ready." It goes to Drew. BOOM. Spot on prediction on my part, though relatively unexpected. Zak is heartbroken, as was I. I was hoping that Chris would've packed his bags, but poor little Zak has to go home to his adorable mom and explain why Desiree let him go. And the hardest part will undoubtedly be coming up with that explanation. I feel for that guy, I really do.

Next Week:

"The Men Tell All" airs next week so there will be no elimination. Instead, we will have a reunion of 22 testosterone filled, protein packed, guys. There will be screaming, yelling, pointing, and most likely...crying. Get excited ladies and gentlemen.

The Bachelorette: Week 7 Recap

2013-07-09T23:01:00.001-04:00

Week 7

This week, Des and her suitors traveled to the island of Madeira, well off the coast of Portugal. We are down to just five men, which means that next week is hometowns! My favorite week, personally. But, before we get there, one man needs to go and a few more dates need to be had. No sight of Chris Harrison at the beginning of the episode, and no personal delivery of the date card. (Turns out, Chris was supporting a friend at a charity golf tournament which is why he was late for filming. Fun fact.)

The episode began with a mini-reunion of a few of the girls from last season: Catherine (Sean's fiance), Leslie, and Jackie. Getting the girls' opinion on the guys seemed to really put Des' mind at ease after having it shaken last week with James. It was so good to see that the girls remained friends even after the show ended! I approve.

Brook's Second 1-on-1: The man who got the first one on one date of the season has gotten his second. Go Brooks. The two drive off in a super sexy...Smart Car and head for the mountains. They spent most of the day driving, not exactly my ideal date. When Brooks and Des finally made it to the top, they settled down on a rock in the clouds and shared a few kisses and good conversation. *Cue unnecessary amounts of metaphors to how "love is like being in the clouds."* I swear those lines are scripted. While atop the mountain and amongst the clouds, Des and Brooks create a few "adjectives" to describe the stages between like and love. They came up with "stepping", "skipping", "jogging", "running", and "finish line." Pardon me, but those are four verbs and a noun. Don't mind me, just the grammar police over here. As cheesy as these terms are, keep them in mind as they play into the show later on. Brooks and Des finish off the night with a private fireworks show, courtesy of ABC. First week without a private concert! I think ABC has been reading my blog...

Chris' Second 1-on-1: Chris, another front runner, and Des spend their day on a private yacht in the royal blue waters of Madeira. With an awkward send off from the guys atop the balcony, the date is underway. Chris and Des seems to have some really good chemistry and she is giddy when she's around him. He really is the dark horse of the season in my opinion. Des and Chris beach it on a private island (typical) and hike through beautiful trails and flowers. At dinner, Chris tells Des that he loves her...through yet another poem. I'm sorry, but I am over the poetry at this point and wish this guy could just talk to her not in Iambic pentameter. Des is still clearly touched by his expression of love and it's pretty clear that this guy will be getting a hometown date.

Michael's 1-on-1: Michael finally gets his first one on one date, seven weeks into the show. He was behind the eight ball from the very beginning of this episode and it was clear to the audience that he would be the one going home. Although, if I was Des, I would have sent him home a few weeks ago after his 2-on-1 date with Ben. But, alas. Desiree and Michael spend the day exploring Madeira, trying weird tropical fruits, and riding on a manpowered go-kart type thing. It was just strange, and boring. Michael does open up to Des, but it was just too little too late. It was clear that her relationships with other four guys had progressed much further than her's and Michael's and there was no time to catch up. Time to throw in the towel, bud.

Drew and Zak's 2-on-1: I know what you're thinking. Another two one one date?! With two of my favorite people?! Don't worry. Although there is a rose on this date, no one will be going home until the rose ceremony. So, there's not as much pressure and Des admits that it feels more like hanging out with two of her guys friends...both of which she's romantically involved with. Interesting. Drew and Zak race real go-karts around an amazing track as Des waves the checkered flag in her high heels just like in the arcade racing games. Zak wins by a mile, not even looking back to see Drew, let alone letting up on the gas. His first place in the race earns him the first one on one session with Desiree. He shares a bunch of drawings depicting the progression of their relationship and Des clearly enjoys that he is artistic and creative. Zak really has a way of making Desiree laugh, and it's fun to watch. Drew's time with Desiree is once again, impecable. She spends most of the day trying to get Drew to "let go" and he talks of how he makes sure the people he lets in are trusting. Drew also shares with Desiree his excitement for her potentially meeting his entire family, and Desiree can't help from smiling. Drew's kindness and caring personality is almost contagious it seems. Drew gets the rose, which really indicates him as the front runner, in my opinion. Overall, it was probably the coolest two on one date in Bachelor history.

Also, I would like to point out that both of these men wore Converses to this date. Major bonus points in my book.

Rose Ceremony: Prior to the rose ceremony, Des and Chris (thanks for finally showing up) have a really bizarre interview. Chris gets Des to admit that she is at the "finish line" with Brooks, which means that she loves him. Hold your horses. I could've sworn the Bachelor/ette were in a contract to where they couldn't say they were in love with a specific person until the final episode! I am so confused. At that point, it seemed as if she was ready to just end the rest of the show and choose Brooks. But then she tells Chris she's also falling for Chris (the other one) and he's confused as well. Basically, this entire interview was a waste of my time and hurt my brain. Des sends Michael home at the rose ceremony. His exit is very graceful and he makes it clear that he has nothing but good things to say about Des and respects her decision. He also wishes her luck and comments that she has four great guys. True, but a weird comment from the guy that was just eliminated.

So, Brooks, Chris, Zak, and Drew will each take Desiree to their hometown next week to meet their family. This coming week is really the make it or break it week. Things can change so quickly and front runners can go home in the blink of an eye depending on how their family reacts to Desiree. Because of this, I don't feel completely confident in my prediction for who will be going home next week, but I'll give it a shot anyways.

Elimination Prediction:

Zak W.

The Bachelorette: Week 6 Recap

2013-07-02T20:48:00.003-04:00

Week 6

HOLA. Bienvenidos a Barcelona para esta episodio! (Welcome to Barcelona for this episode). We are six weeks into Desiree's journey to find love and this week Spain is the "perfect place to fall in love", as is every other place they have and will visit. Chris meets the boys in a local plaza and hands out the first date card; it's for Drew. Holla.

Drew AKA Jay Gatsby AKA perfect.

Drew's 1-on-1: Finally. My man Drew gets his well deserved one on one date. Drew meets Desiree in the streets of Barcelona looking gorgeous as always and Desiree reveals that they will be spending the day exploring Spain. Drew couldn't be more pleased and it's obvious that he is so genuinely excited to be here with Des and spend any time possible with her. Love him. Over tapas and wine, Drew reveals some of his family history with Des. His hero is his recovered alcoholic father, and this story really touches Des. She is appreciative of how open Drew is, as if he had a choice. I'm not sure what it is about Drew, but he just radiates on camera. There is just something about this kid, and I'm a fan. Before the two can enjoy their dinner, Drew spontaneously grabs Des by the hand and leads her into a dark alley...(stay tuned)...for a super romantic kiss. Des loves it, oh girl. Of course, she offers him the rose, and he accepts. What happens next is probably one of the smartest plays in Bachelorette history. After securing the rose, Drew decides to bring up the house drama with James. Smart move, homie. He gives her the option of hearing what he has to say, and she chooses to listen. Des seems very appreciative of Drew's information, though obviously hurt. Almost perfect date; I just wish Drew would have held his tongue for a week or two longer.

Group Date: Gooooooooooooooal! Looks like the boys will be facing off in a soccer game this week. Juan Pablo's dream date. As a former pro soccer player, it was clear that Juan Pablo was in his element and loving every second of it. Brooks made a hilarious comment that "Juan Pablo's name is directly translated to 'You have no chance. And I am going after Desiree at this moment in the soccer field.'" Kid has jokes. The boys face off against Desiree and a team of seemingly harmless girls. But to the boy's surprise, a combination of these girls hidden soccer talents and James' terrible goalie skills caused them to lose the game 10-2. I could see all of their egos deflating on the field.

The men ready to play soccer, and James. Terrified
of anything that comes near his overly sculpted body.

It was clear from the moment the group date "cocktail hour" started that the drama with James was going to come up. And quick. It wasn't long before Kasey pulled Des aside to back up Drew's story and the other men confronted James. Though his facial expressions showed surprise at the allegations of him "positioning himself to be the next Bachelor", his excessive cursing, sweating, and rambling said otherwise. Des decides not to give out the group rose and sends all of the men home, expect James. Duh duh duh. She confronts him about everything that has been said and it's clear (to me) that James is a big fat liar and needs to pack his bags, protein, and 'roids, and head home to the Jersey Shore. Despite it being clear to the audience of James' intentions, Desiree gives him the benefit of the doubt and decides that they both need to "sleep on it." Not my favorite choice of hers, but as long as she got rid of him by the end of the episode, I would be pleased.

Zak's 1-on-1: Zak was filled in by the men in the house about the James' situation and he knows that Desiree is probably emotionally exhausted from last night, and makes it a point to put that all aside for the day and just let her smile and be herself. Precious. The two head to a local art studio and sketch a couple of models. We have known from the beginning of the season that Des loves to draw and be artistic, and she is clearly in her element, and Zak loves that about her. He's actually not too bad of an artist himself and impresses both Desiree and me with his sketches. After the first sketch of a man in a trenchcoat, a male model walks in in a robe, drops it, and poses nude for the two. I was dying laughing at this point. Zak's facial expression is priceless, poor guy. He sucks it up though, and that is commendable. Zak and Des draw each other and I have absolutely no words for Zak's drawing of Desiree. She literally falls to the floor dying laughing in one of my favorite moments of the season. Zak ends the excursion by walking into the room in a robe and dramatically dropping it to pose for Desiree in his underwear. Once again, hilarious.

Dinner is perfect, and Zak reveals to the camera that he is in love with Desiree. 100%. Uh oh. I love this guy, I really do, but I have a bad feeling that he is going to end up getting his heart completely broken and I'm not looking forward to watching that. Zak gets the rose and ends the date with another dark alley/cave romantic kiss with Desiree. Boy, the guys have really stepped up their game this week.

Let's just all take a second to appreciate three of the guys
spying on Des and James' intense conversation from
the balcony. Perfect.

Rose Ceremony: Woah woah woah Chris. Why are there only three roses on the plate?! Apparently, three men will be going home tonight. I freaked out a little, because I really only wanted James and Michael G. to go home. Who else would she send home? Not Juan Pablo. He's freaking adorable, hilarious, and really sweet. And definitely not Kasey...well, maybe Kasey. Turns out, this girl decides to keep litigator Michael G (for whatever reason) and send Juan Pablo, Kasey, and James home. Despite James' rather unattractive plea to stay on the show, Des makes the right decision and sends him home. Drew makes the perfect comment that she had a really tough choice tonight sending home two great guys, Juan Pablo and Kasey, but that justice was done in sending home James and that is most important. Agreed.

I refuse to address the preview for the rest of the season because I can't even handle what's going on in it and...well yeah, I just can't. Sorry.

Predictions for Hometowns:

1. Drew
2. Brooks
3. Zak
4. Chris

Michael G. goes home.

The Bachelorette: Week 5 Recap

2013-06-26T00:39:00.002-04:00

This week, my family, Morgan, and me are in the Ozark Mountains relaxing and rejuvenating. However, don't think that just because I am surrounded by beautiful scenery, wildlife, and God's great creations, I would miss out on The Bachelorette. No sir. Morgan set her alarm for 7:00 and the entire family proceeded to watch The Bachelorette together in our mountain home living room. This was my my dad's, mom's, and uncle's first time watching the show, and their reactions were perhaps more entertaining than the show itself.

Week 5

Chris' 1-on-1: This week, Desiree and the men travled to Munich, Germany on their first leg around the world on this "incredible journey to find love." The first 1-on-1 date was for Chris. Desiree had never been to Europe before this trip, so she and Chris spent their date meandering through the streets on Munich, struggling with German, and drinking lots of beer. They found their way to the Rock Hall in the city centre and began to dance to the local music.

*Camera changes to Bryden at the hotel*. Bryden is clearly still struggling with his feelings for Desiree and in a conversation with James, determines that it would be best for him to head home. He sets out into the streets of Germany (with the camera men) to find Desiree and Chris and inform Des that he has decided to leave. Not your best move, Bryden. I smell producers all over that set up. Regardless, Bryden finds Des, to her and Chris' surprise, and asks to talk to her for a few minutes. By this point, I think that Desiree knows whats coming and she is not surprised when Bryden breaks the news. Although she is not surprised, she is clearly upset, both at the news of his departure, but probably more so at the fact that he flew all the way over to Germany and then immediately decided to leave. Bryden and Des say an incredibly awkward goodbye, sans hugs or any form of affection, and Desiree heads back to her date with Chris. She is determined to "stay positive and not let Bryden affect the rest of her day", as she holds back the tears on camera. Fail. The rest of Chris and Desiree's date goes very smoothly and it is clear that the two have a connection I had not seen on camera prior to this episode. Chris has moved his way up to the front runner position, and I'm a fan. Des and Chris kiss frequently throughout the dinner and cliche private concert, much to my father's displeasure and clear disgust.

Group Date: Desiree takes seven men on a group date sledding down the most picturesque mountains I have ever seen. The date begins with a yodeling lesson (and a little marriage advice) from a local German. Juan Pablo quickly embraces the situation and turns it into a rather comedic viewing experience. Juan Pablo is growing on me each week, and it's not just because he has an accent and is incredibly good looking. He's flipping hilarious. This group date truly looked like an absolute blast! Following the sledding adventures, the group heads into a private manmade ice castle and begin the rotation of Desiree. Brooks is the first to secure one on one time with Desiree, followed by Mikey. Before Mikey can make his move, Zak pulls a hilarious stunt by yodeling right behind the couple and stealing Desiree away. Desiree genuinely finds this funny and she has no problem leaving Mikey for Zak. Bad sign for Mikey. James has a solid one on one session with Desiree, despite Brooks awkwardly creeping on the two as they shared a kiss. Weird.

Throughout the course of the group date, it becomes clear that a few of the guys have a problem with James. In overhearing conversations between James and Mikey, Drew reveals that James plans to become the next Bachelor and profit off of the publicity back home. Rude. Desiree is unaware of this new house tension, and remains so throughout the entire episode. ABC is saving that drama for next week, ladies. Brooks secures the group rose in what seemed to be a bit of a lack luster group date, romantically at least.

Ben and Michael's 2-on-1: Uh oh. The dreaded two on one. Each season, there is one date card that every man prays his name is not on, and that is the 2-on-1. Desiree will take two men on one date; one stays, one goes. It promises to be the most awkward, tension filled date of the season, and this one did not disappoint. Ben had already been quite the source of tension in the house, particularly with Michael. Flashback to week two when Ben stole Desiree away from Michael as he was revealing his diabetic condition to her. There is already too much tension between these two men (boys) before the date even begins. Michael promises to the viewers to reveal Ben as the fraud that he truly is and plans to use his litigation skills to do so. Oh boy. Ben is his usual arrogant self and saunters around the house waiting for the date to begin.

Desiree, and her perfect humor, fools the boys into thinking that they will be doing the Polar Bear Plunge into the frigid water. Just as she counts to three, she reveals that they will instead be swimming in their own "hot tug." A hot tug is just like a hot tub, but a boat. This would be perfectly romantic if there weren't two guys on this date, but for whatever reason, ABC finds it necessary to put both Desiree and the men through this torture time and time again. The tension between the two men grows as Michael starts throwing not so subtle comments at Ben about his faith and his role as a father. Ben keeps his cool and seems to be taking the hits well until a fastball about his son knocks him out at dinner and he leaves the room to "gather his thoughts." At this point, I would have sent both Michael and Ben home for acting like immature idiots, but Desiree decides to keep Michael around for another week because she can "see a future with him." First bad move of the season, chicka. Despite her (the producer's) poor choice in keeping Michael, Ben is gone which is definitely a plus. What's the saying about not having your cake and eating it too?

Rose Ceremony: Desiree once again opts for no cocktail party, but also no pool party. It's straight to the rose ceremony. This upsets Drew in particular as he was determined to out James in his one-on-one time with Desiree. However, this could've been his saving grace as the person that outs another man often ends up going home instead. Hold on, Drew! I want you around for a lot longer. Because there was no rose ceremony, it's clear to the viewers that the person she is sending home is Mikey. He is the only one left that she hadn't kissed and it was evident that their "relationship" and connection was not nearly as strong as the other men in the house. He says a curt goodbye and exits stage right.

The preview for next week shows drama on drama on drama. Be prepared for an obscene amount of man tears, Desiree tears, and perhaps even some Chris Harrison tears. Who knows? That guy gets pretty involved with this show. Hopefully we will get rid of all the snakes in the house next week and the show can refocus on the actual dates and Desiree's search for love. Fingers crossed.

Top 5:

1. Chris

2. Brooks

3. Drew

4. Zak

5. Juan Pablo

The Bachelorette: Week 4 Recap

2013-06-18T22:16:00.000-04:00

Week 4
Let the traveling begin! Sort of. The Bachelor and Bachelorette are known for having exotic dates all over the world, dates us normal people can't even imagine. This week, the group left the house in California and boarded a plane to Atlantic City, New Jersey. Con: Not exotic and a disappointment for the viewers. Pro: The majority of the guys look like Jersey boys, so they should fit right in. #passtheprotein.

Brad's 1-on-1: Brad gets the first date card, and he is thrilled to have the one-on-one with Des. Duh. However, before the date starts, Zak and Mikey both foreshadow Brad being spent home.The general consensus is that Brad is really sweet, but really quiet and not for Des. Not sure if it's the single dad factor or what, but the boys are convinced Brad is going home, and by the time the date starts, so am I. Poor editing on ABC's part. Brad and Des spend the day on the boardwalk playing carnival games, riding rides, and eating all sorts of delicious deserts. They hang out in a giant sandcastle city on the beach before heading to dinner inside a local lighthouse. During dinner, it looks like Des isn't really feeling the vibes with Brad. The conversation is definitely struggling. Between the long pauses, awkward laughs, and boring dialogue, it's clear that Des is going to send Brad home. (Despite her standard "I'm conflicted" interview). She makes a last ditch effort to keep it alive by suggesting they climb to the top of the lighthouse. During the climb, we have more voiceovers from other guys predicting Brad's demise. And they're right! Brad doesn't get the rose and packs his bags. He had nothing but positive things to say about Des in his exit interview. Brad is a sweet guy, but it was clear that he was not the one. And then there were 12.

Group Date:

On this week's group date, the men competed in a "Mr. America" pageant. Boy, I knew I was in for a treat as soon as Chris Harrison announced it. And by "treat" I mean me shaking my head more times than I can count and being in a continual state of embarrassment for all the boys. The pageant consisted of the standard interviews, talent show, and swimsuit competition. The men performed in front of a live audience full of screaming women. I probably would've peed my pants I'd be so nervous. There were some very interesting answers during the interview process. We found out that Juan Pablo has a kid too. What. Lots of dads this season. Mikey gets really serious and sentimental with his answer and draws quite the laugh by stating that guys aren't just a piece of meat and are emotional as well. And then proceeds to take his shirt off during the talent portion and do handstand pushups, acting exactly like a "piece of meat." Brooks is rather humorous and keeps a lighthearted attitude throughout the entire competition, even smashing his ukulele on stage. It's hard for me to pick a standout from all of the "talents" because they were all incredibly entertaining. Between baton twirling, men in heels, guitars, hula hoops, tap dancing, and Shakespeare readings, I couldn't figure out where to look. (Just kidding, I was staring at Drew). The swimsuit competition was...interesting. For whatever reason, ABC felt it necessary to put a handful of these guys in speedos. Ew. No one, not even Ryan Gosling, should ever wear a speedo. At the end of it all, it is Kasey that takes the title.

During the remainder of the group date, Ben causes more house drama by stealing Des away from the group and sitting right in front of all of them to talk to her. Zak W. plays Des a song on guitar that he wrote and impressed both Des and me. He had a surprisingly good voice. His performance and sweet personality got him the group rose; I approve.

James' 1-on-1: For James and Des' date, they take a helicopter tour of New Jersey with an American Red Cross volunteer. It's the first helicopter ride of the season, though not in the usual context. They spend their ride looking at all of the damage that Hurricane Sandy did to New Jersey; it is absolutely unbelievable what nature can do. They meet a couple that has lost almost everything due to Hurricane Sandy and grow quite fond of them. The older couple shares that Hurricane Sandy came on the night of their 38th anniversary. Des is touched by their story, and after conferring with James, decides to give their date to these Hurricane Sandy survivors. Bonus points. James and Des hit up a local pizza for dinner and share deep conversation. James is (over)honest and shares that he cheated on a past girlfriend. This makes the situation rather awkward as Des was cheated on. She is disappointed in James' mistake, but she appreciates his honesty and seems to move on from that conversation with an incredible amount of ease. Des and James join the older couple for a private concert by Darius Rucker. (Count 'em, three private concerts this season). Des gives James the rose and the night ends on a positive note.

Cocktail Party and Rose Ceremony:
The main focus of the cocktail party was Bryden. Despite his wonderful first date with Des, he has been lacking some feelings for her since then, and has "fallen behind where [he thinks he should be]." Des makes it clear in her one on one time with Bryden that she wants him here and hopes that he will trust the process and stick around. This gives Bryden enough reassurance to accept the rose she offers him. But barely. The dummy stands there for what feels like an eternity after Des calls his name before walking forward to accept the rose. Zack K. is sent home tonight, and it comes as quite a shock to him. However, he manages to keep his composure in his exit interview and hold back the man tears.

Top 5:

1. Brooks
2. Zak W.
3. Bryden. If he can keep his head in the game (so to speak), I still think he will go pretty far.
4. Drew
5. James (Although, the preview for next week shows some pretty sketchy stuff with him)

The Bachelorette: Week 3 Recap

2013-06-11T23:10:00.001-04:00

Week 3
We are already three weeks in everyone. There's no cheesy intros this week, thank goodness. The first date card is given and we start the episode with a group date.

Group Date:

Today, the boys will be competing in a game of dodgeball. This is going to be good I can tell. Let the testosterone fly. As the men are learning dodgeball techniques from some local professionals, Chris Harrison walks in the door. Somethings up. For you Bachelor/ette newbies out there, anytime Chris shows up unexpected, there's a plot twist coming. This one: "winner takes all." The team that wins the match stays for the rest of the date, and the other goes home. This means that half of the men will get more quality time with Des and the other half will go home, cry together, and drink their sorrows away. On cue, and to a terrible theme song, the men walk out in a V formation, short shorts, headbands and all. Just like a scene out of the fantastic movie Dodgeball. Sans the hilarious Ben Stiller and Vince Vaughn. Drew wins the first game for the Blue Team. *Swoon*. But the Red Team makes quick work of winning the second game. It all comes down to the final game. Of course. And Brooks takes a hit. In the finger. He's down and out for the count ladies. Red teams tries to "bring it home for Brooks", but fails. It's Blue, more specifically Zack K., that wins the game...and more time with Des. Just kidding. Des pulls a standard "everyone's a winner" card and lets everyone come to the after party. How boring.

Camera shot switches to overdramatic ER scene with Brooks. Apparently he passed out as they were setting his finger back into place. Man up, dude. Anyways, Des and her slew of men now cheers over their first of many drinks of the night. Brad is the first to open up for night. He has a son, surprise! Des is accepting and so genuine in her appreciation for him sharing his life with her. *Tender moment*. I really do love her. Brooks steps out of the car looking like a hot mess, still in his dodgeball garb. But despite his puppy dog eyes and pity card, its Chris that gets the group rose. I was hoping that Brad would get the rose, but I like Chris equally. (I'm surprising myself and really starting have quite a few favorites this season, despite the terrible season premiere.) Des and Chris walk away into their own private concert. Standard. COME ON, ABC. Give me something new!

Kasey's 1 on 1: Prior to Des and Kasey's date, Des gets a call from Chris Harrison. Once again, the viewers immediately know something is up. It appears that someone in the house has a girlfriend. And that someone is Brian. Despite Des' attempt to coax the information out of him, he continues to respond, "Yeah, I'm definitely here for the right reasons. I'm ready to find love". And then his girlfriend walks through the door, and jaws drop. It's about to go down, ladies and gentleman. Basically, it was a lot of yelling back and forth, including confessions of domestic violence as the girlfriend shouted "Yes, I threw rocks at your face!", before Des made the final call and sent Brian (and his equally crazy girlfriend) home. She means business, boys.

Well, it's finally time for Des and Kasey's date. A few hours and too many man tears later. Looks like Des and Kasey will be dancing on the side of a building in Sunset Blvd. Normal happenings. Well, they looked incredibly uncoordinated, but it did look like fun! Their romantic dinner is quickly interrupted by monsoon-like winds and they jump into the freezing cold pool. Bad idea. The rest of the date goes downhill and it turns into the weirdest date of all time. Thanks, Brian for ruining the whole day. Despite the circumstances, Kasey still walks away with a rose. Des admits on camera that her mood was shaken from earlier today and she wants to give Kasey another chance, since none of this was his fault. So, success...although it was probably one of the most boring one on one dates in the show's history.

Group Date #2: This week, Des opted for two group dates as she felt that this early in the season, she still needed time with all of the guys in order to make good decisions. Solid choice, Des. Looks like the boys will be learning good ole fashioned western stunts today in a clever product placement for the new movie The Lone Ranger. Each of the men perform a combination of stunts and sweep Des off of her feet. Juan Pablo impresses Des the most and gets the extra time. They watch The Lone Ranger in a special private screening and share their first magical kiss. After the movie, Des talks with a few more men and James really steals her heart for the night. He's absolutely precious and is lacking some confidence. Keep in mind, this guy is jacked and rather attractive, but for whatever reason, he's not sure if Des likes him. Turns out, she does. James gets the group date rose. Yay!

Eliminations: Des cancelled the first cocktail party of the season and opted for a pool party instead. I love this girl more and more each week. Prior to the pool party, Ben steals Des away for a 15 minute car ride. Typical. The only main events of the pool party were seeing fifteen men sitting together in a hot tub and Brandon telling Des that he is "falling in love with [her]." You can tell Des is taken aback by this comment, and Brandon ends up going home as Ben secures the final rose of the night. Brandon is shocked as he doesn't get a rose, just hours after he tells Des he is falling in love with her. It was too much too soon, buddy. During his exit interview, he couldn't even cry because he was just "out of tears." No surprise there. He's been crying since he arrived on the very first night.

Top 5:

1. Drew. I'm just obsessed with him and I think his lack of camera time early on in the season is a good indication that he will hang around for a while.
2. Brooks. Still hating the hair. Still loving his personality.
3. Bryden. Des is totally into the military men! And for good reason.
4. James. Des and James seem to have quite a few inside jokes together and enjoy being silly together. A huge part of love, in my opinion.
5. Zak W. I'm still loving Zak; he's flipping hilarious. I'm hoping he gets a one-on-one next week.

The Bachelorette: Week 1 & 2 Recap

2013-06-04T18:34:00.001-04:00

Last season, on the Bachelor, Sean Lowe dumped Desiree (Des) Hartsock in one of the most heart wrenching exits the show has ever seen. Des literally begged Sean not to let her go because she was "100% certain that [he] was making a mistake." Despite Des' plea, Sean let her go and went on to propose to Catherine Giudici. (They are still together and planned to have a TV wedding in the near future, yay!) Perhaps the biggest reason why Sean let Des go was her crazy, overprotective, judgmental brother who called Sean a "playboy" on national television. Although Sean tried his very best to hide his anger and frustration with Des' brother, it was evident that the two of them did not see eye-to-eye and that sent Des packing.

Week 1

Des was a fan favorite from the very beginning of the show, so it was no surprise when she was announced as the next Bachelorette. Last week, twenty-five men arrived in limos and did their very best to impress Des in what proved to be probably the most entertaining and definitely the most embarrassing entrances of any season. From Diogo, who arrived as a literal version of Des' "knight in shining armor" to Zak W. who arrived shirtless with the opening line of, "Do you accept these abs?", the entrances were one for the books. In my years watching the show, I have always found the first night to be incredibly awkward. The Bachelorette has to stand and smile at the arriving limos that she can't see into, give out an unnecessary amount of half-hugs, and say "Thank you" to countless genuine, but obligatory "You look beautiful" from her suitors. A few standouts were Kasey the "hashtag guy" who greeted Des with a few hashtags that described her including #marriagematerial and #letthejourney begin. I'm still a tad #onthefence about Kasey, but will give him a fair shot. Magic Nick made Des "disappear" in the cheesiest magic act of all time. Hint: He gets sent home. Ben greeted Des with his son and eventually got the first rose of the night. Or should I say his son did?

Among the attempts to impress Des, we watched the most memorable (and sleazy) bachelor on night one, Jonathan, invite Des not once, but three times, to a "fantasy suite" that he had created somewhere in house. After turning him down politely twice, Desiree said no once again and asked him to leave because he was making her feel very uncomfortable. Go Des! It was clear that Jonathan was not here for the "right reasons." Stay tuned as this becomes a mantra for this season. In an unnecessarily long rose ceremony (as always), Des sends her first handful of guys packing and prepares for her first week of dates. Although I was not particularly blown away by any of the men, my top 5 picks thus far are:

Drew. He's gorgeous, rocks a Gatsby hair-do, and completely owns it. Also, but less important, he seems like a genuine guy with a good sense of humor.
Brooks. Despite his lack of air time on the season premiere, he was shown heavily on the "This season on The Bachelorette..." previews which included a one-on-one date that looked like a "destination date", hinting towards him making it pretty far in the season.
Bryden. A military vet, Bryden immediately stole my heart. He is a tad more reserved than most of the other guys, but seems to be very respectful and a good listener. Two great qualities in a man.
Zak W. Even after appearing shirtless and coming off as an egocentric guy, Des chose to keep him around for another week. ~~I think they must have had a good conversation or two off camera that led Des to her decision.~~ Let's be honest, Des (along with America) was impressed by his abs and accepted them with open arms.
Juan Pablo. A former Venezuelan pro soccer player, Juan Pablo swept Des off her feet with his soccer skills and indecipherable accent. I predict Des will only keep him around for a few more weeks to serve as eye candy before sending him home. Adios!

Week 2

It's the first week of dates! Which means, it is also the first week of drama. Buckle up everyone, this season is going to have an unusual amount of man tears. At the beginning of the show, Chris Harrison walks in with his ever-so-perfect timing and sets down the first 1-on-1 date card of the season. It's for Brooks.

Brooks' 1-on-1: When Brooks hears his named called, he looks as happy as a newly adopted puppy and rushes off to get ready for his date. AKA throw on a different shirt and not brush his insanely long hair. Des arrives in a blue Bentley and the two drive off together as the other guys look on enviously. Their first stop: a bridal store. Des tries on numerous wedding dresses and Brooks does the same with tuxes before they each decide on one they like. All as a joke, of course. The two make their way to the Hollywood sign and climb up the side of the giant hill to sit on one of the huge letters. Des claims that the only reason they are allowed to come up here is because Hollywood is celebrating its 90th Anniversary. Yeah, right. You're up there because ABC paid big bucks for you to be. Following their adventure, Des and Brooks have dinner on a bridge with a private concert. Standard Bachelorette date. Not impressed. Aside from his terrible hair, I really like Brooks. Des did too, because she didn't hesitate to give him the rose and go in for their first kiss. Overall, I would say a very successful date and Brooks remains a front-runner.

Group Date: Des invited fourteen men on the first group date of the season to a giant mansion where they would be filming a rap video with Soulja Boy. What. Going into this date, Des knew that it would be embarrassing for both the guys and herself, but she hoped they would all roll with the punches and let loose. The title of their rap was "All The Right Reasons" and it starred Des and all of her bachelors in rare form. The costumes were absolutely hilarious, particularly Brandons skimpy short shorts, but I must admit it was a step up from all of the v-necks that the guys came in wearing. Some of the guys struggled with their lines, and others proved to be true rap stars waiting to be discovered. Just kidding. This was the absolute whitest bunch of guys I have ever seen and Soulja Boy could not keep a straight face he was laughing so hard at them. The video shoot came to a close, thank goodness, and Des and her herd of men headed to their soiree. All of the men fought for Des' time and attention, but in the end, it was Ben who got the group rose, to many of the guys' dismay. By this point, a few of the guys have been rubbed the wrong way by Ben and it is clear that he will prove to be the source of drama in the house this season.

Bryden's 1-on-1: The lucky winner of Date #2, Bryden and Des drive off together on a road trip around California. I'm sorry, but I don't think I would want to spend most of my first date with someone driving. No thanks. Des and Bryden stop at a beach and Ojai for a romantic dinner. Though Bryden seems nervous for most of the date, (at least on camera) he really opens up to Des and shares some tough things about his past. She is blown away and this earns him the rose, taking the pressure off for the night. Well, not quite. The two end up in a hot tub hanging out, just talking, and it is clear that Des is waiting for Bryden to make his move. But he never does. Personally, I read that as a sign that he respects women. +1 point. However, the impatient and bold (you go girl!) Des says, "Just kiss me already." and the two share a wonderful first kiss together. Blah blah blah.

Cocktail Party and Rose Ceremony: This is when it gets real. Real fast. Despite already having a rose and being "safe" for the next week, Ben finds it necessary to interrupt Michael G. during his heartfelt conversation with Desiree about living with Type I Diabetes. Word spreads through the house like wildfire and the guys quickly become angered with Ben. A few confront him directly and he apologizes, sort of. Many of the guys think that he isn't here for the "right reasons", a phrase said way too many times throughout this episode. At some God-awfully late hour of the night I'm sure, Chris Harrison walks in and *clinkity clinks* his glass and the cocktail party is over. It's time for the rose ceremony. Des returns from her deep deliberation and the guys "ooh" and "ahh" at the sight of her in her stunning dress. Yet again. However, I wasn't a huge fan of her dress tonight and decided that if I were ever to become the Bachelorette, I would make everyone wear normal clothes, all the time. Nike shorts and a t-shirt would become the new staple. Anyways, back to Des. She sent three more men home tonight, but one came as quite the surprise to America: Robert. Robert is absolutely gorgeous and America just couldn't figure out why Des would send him home so soon. She later tweeted out to her fans: "Sorry ladies! Robert aka Liam Hemsworth's brother dated my friend before so I couldn't keep him around. #thebachelorette #friendsfirst." Ahhhh. It all makes sense now. I knew I recognized that flawless face.

My Top 5 After Week 2:

Brooks
Bryden
Drew
Zak W
Ben (unfortunately)

More Info About The Show (If You're Curious)

She's Baaack.

2013-06-04T16:08:00.000-04:00

♪♫♭Guess who's back? Back again. Schmidty's back. Tell a friend. ♭♫♪

My Spring semester was absolutely crazy busy, and left me with very little time to blog. I also had very little to write about, but I'm back with lots on my mind! So, what did you miss the past six months? Well, let me break it down for you:

I struggled through Financial Accounting (for the second time), but made it out alive and with a passing grade!
I have been "CrossFitting" harder than ever before and have seen some great progress with my strength and endurance. In April, I was awarded the Female Athlete of the Month at Gator CrossFit. I am so blessed to be part of the Gator CrossFit community and look to forward to each and every workout. Well, almost every workout.
On April 11, my roommate and best friend Callie and I attended a Taylor Swift concert in and had the time of our lives.
Over the past two semesters, I have watched eight of my closest friends turn 21 and we have took Gainesville by storm each and every time. On Friday, it will be my birthday, and I will finally be...20. #Junebabyproblems
Atop Snowshoe Mountain, on March 9, my beautiful cousin Marie married the man of her dreams in the most picturesque wedding I have ever been in. I didn't meet her husband Brad until the wedding rehearsal, but I immediately felt like I had known him for years. Brad and Marie are truly a match made and heaven and I am so honored to have been a part of their wedding and cannot wait for their future together.

So that's what you missed. The past six months summed up in a paragraph or two. Of course, I'm probably leaving out more than I realize, but those were the highlights that came to mind. This summer, I am in Gainesville taking Managerial Accounting and Calculus 2 (prayers, please). Despite the courses I'm enrolled in, I expect to have a significant amount of free time these coming months to get back into blogging. My project for the summer will be a weekly Bachelorette recap. The Bachelorette (sister-show to The Bachelor) is a another ridiculous (addicting) dating show on television that occupies me each and every Monday night. Though it won't be comparable to my summer in Rome, I hope it still proves to be entertaining and worth the read. I will be posting on Tuesdays with the recap from the previous night. In addition, I hope to be able to throw in another post every now and then in the mix. I'm so excited to be writing again; thanks for reading and enjoy!

Writer's Block

2012-12-09T16:54:00.001-05:00

As the new year approches, I have been struggling to think of things to write about. Each Monday, I have sat down at my computer and tried to come up with something to post, but as you can see, for the last 4 Mondays I have been unsuccessful. For those of you that have been following me from the very beginning when this blog was "Make Way for Alligators", it has been a year and a half now. Unfortunately, I have written about all of the "timely things" such as New Years Resolutions, Valentine's Day, Christmas, and more. As 2013 rolls around, I would feel weird writing about those same subjects again for much of the content would probably be the same. My daily life in Gainesville is not nearly exciting enough for me to write about, trust me. Being almost entirely consumed by school, I'm afraid that my blog would become much too educational for my liking.

So, here's the plan. I will be taking a hiatus from my weekly blog posting until further notice. I don't expect this to be very long, but I think I need some time let my brain relax. Hopefully after this break I will have come up with and stored away great material to write about for many Mondays to come. I apologize for any inconvenience this may cause you...which I'm assuming is none. I hope you all have a wonderful holiday season and a fantastic start to the year 2013. That is, of course, assuming the Mayans were wrong and we all make it past December 21, 2012.

President Obama Re-Elected

2012-11-12T11:25:00.000-05:00

Well, it's official. With the re-count of Florida finally in, President Obama will have another four years in the White House. On November 6, all of America tuned into their televisions as the votes trickled in and the projections started being made. For the first hour or two, Republicans felt pretty comfortable that Romney would win this election. At the time, he had many more electoral votes than Obama and was also leading in the popular vote. Democrats, however, were also extremely confident that President Obama would win this election. As the voting polls in the more populous states began to close, it became clear that Governor Romney would need to win almost all of the battleground states to pull out a victory in this election. Even at the sight of this large feat, Republicans remained confident and assured their viewers that Romney would pull out a "straight-line" victory. As 10:30 p.m. approached, none of the critical states could be accurately called as all of them were still too close to call. Just after 11:00 p.m., breaking news came in that President Obama would win Ohio. The Democratic Headquarters was beyond excited as this would almost surely secure President Obama four more years in the White House. The Republican Headquarters was quiet and tense as the audience stared at the television hoping for some sort of miracle for Governor Romney. That miracle would never come. President Obama would go on to win Virginia, Nevada, Colorado, and Florida giving him 332 electoral votes, many more than the 270 required for re-election. President Obama would also win the popular vote by almost 4 million votes. The last time than an incumbent lost re-election was George Bush Sr., so it was most definitely a stretch for Governor Romney to pull out a "W". Despite his loss, Romney clearly gave Obama a run for his money in what ended up being a pretty close election.

It's clear that America is changing, both demographically and in our mindset, and America wants a President that sees this change and views it as progress. I hope, and am optimistic in the idea that, without another election in his future, President Obama will be more apt to work with both parties and accomplish more of the goals that he had previously set out to do. To his defense, this is no easy feat. America is clearly divided, which I find to be very discouraging. I think that both parties need to make significant changes and an effort to work together. Some say that in order to have a chance at winning the election in 2016, Republicans need to completely rebrand their party and come to the middle on issues such as gay marriage and abortion. Unfortunately, these are two of the issues that Republicans believe most strongly in and the likelihood of that happening seems to be very slim. In my opinion, America is at a very critical point in its history. I will be very interested to see what happens in these next four years. I hope that in 2016 we will see an America that truly has moved forward as President Obama has so coined the term.

One Week Until The Election

2012-10-30T12:59:00.000-04:00

Alright ladies and gentlemen. We are officially one week away from the 2012 presidential election. Next Tuesday, (weather permitting) America will make its way to the voting polls and cast their ballots. Analysts are claiming that this could be the closest election since 2000, and Ohio could very well be the deciding state. As candidates are trying to put in their final words and last attempts at persuasion, Hurricane Sandy hits the northeast coast. Meteorologists claim that this storm will be felt by nearly one third of the United States. Hurricane Sandy has already caused 26 storm related deaths and millions are without power. New York City is almost unrecognizable as cars float down the flooded streets of Times Square.

So, what does this powerful storm mean for the final week leading up to the election? Well, immediately it has forced both candidates to cancel campaign appearances. With the race as close as it is, these final week appearances were critical for both President Obama and Governor Romney. Some news stations are saying that this storm will benefit President Obama not only by giving him the opportunity to act "presidential" in handling this natural disaster, but also by possibly slowing the steady momentum that Governor Romney had been gaining in the past few weeks. As voters focus on this storm, Republicans worry that the independent voters may forget about the debates and provide Romney with some what of a uphill climb as November 6th approaches. That being said, I believe that both candidates are doing the politically correct thing by essentially not making this storm political. It's important that in these times of trial and disaster competition is temporarily set aside to "come together" as a nation.

Stay safe in this crazy weather, and I will see you next week when we will have a winner of this 2012 presidential election!

Vice Presidential Debate 2012

2012-10-15T18:02:00.002-04:00

Contrary to the Presidential Debate last week, the debate between Vice President Biden and Congressman Ryan struggled to name a clear winner. However, if one had to be chosen, most sources say that Vice President Joe Biden was the victor. The style of this debate was polar opposite to the Presidential Debate we saw just a week ago: both candidates were seated and the tone was much more combative. Now I don't believe that either of these characteristics are inherently negative, but I did not "enjoy" this debate nearly as much as President Obama versus Governor Romney. Whether it was through masking laughs (or in Biden's case, outright laughing), interruptions, or consistently fact checking the other candidate, it was clear that these two men had no intentions of playing clean tonight. Biden had some serious work to do following his boss's performance in convincing America that the two really do want to be reelected this November, and Ryan was expected to continue the energy and solid performance of Governor Romney.

In my opinion, I found the moderator to be biased in favor of Joe Biden. After asking around, I received mixed opinions. Political party affiliation had no effect on opinions, so I can only conclude that it depends on the person. I saw a woman who worded questions in favor of Biden and often challenged Ryan on what he was saying. She continually pressed for more information, which in many people's opinion made her a great moderator. In mine, however, I saw it as helping Biden in making his points. Biden received many comments about his performance, and most of the negative ones referenced his constant interruption and blatant laughing at Ryan. Despite his etiquette, Biden was still named the winner by most sources.

One of the last topics discussed was defense and foreign policy. Each candidate has clearly different views on what America should be doing abroad. Having grown up in a strong military family, I have the upmost appreciation for our troops. I would love a world in which everyone got along and war wasn't a concern, but that won't happen in this lifetime. Having accepted that fact, I strongly believe in having an equipped military. I find it hard to justify backing out of every operation abroad when on September 11, 2012 we experienced a terrorist attack in Libya. It's clear through the increasing attacks, protests, and crimes towards the United States of America that was are not every country's friend and still have very real enemies in this world. Better safe than sorry.

I am looking forward to tomorrow's second Presidential Debate as it will focus much on foreign policy. I am eager to hear both sides' opinions, but almost more eager to see the energy and attitude that President Obama will bring following his poor prior performance. I highly doubt that President Obama will let Governor Romney walk away with another victory so easily. I am expecting (and hoping) for a much more engaging debate tomorrow evening.

Round One: Romney

2012-10-08T20:56:00.000-04:00

Last week, President Obama and Governor Romney participated in their first debate leading up to the election in November. I was very excited for this debate as I am still looking to finalize my decision on who I will be voting for. The results of the debate, however, surprised me. Both Democratic and Republican sources named Romney the clear winner of the debate. America knows President Obama for being a compelling speaker, and on Wednesday, we were all shocked. President Obama gave off the presence that he just didn't want to be there and wasn't prepared at all for the debate. President Obama's body language was submissive, and also dismissive. He wasn't able to retort to many of Governor Romney's comments and often laughed off Romney's statistics. Romney's constant eye contact with the President and correction of the statistics President Obama was revealing let him easily dominate the stage and get his points across much more clearly and compelling than President Obama.

If I'm being completely honest, I didn't fully understand much of what was being said. I was either analyzing the delivery too much or I simply don't understand much of politics. What I did hear was both candidates talk of a balanced budget for our country, though both presented different definitions of what that entails. The passive aggressiveness of both candidates made me rather uncomfortable. Governor Romney often talked over the mediator and beyond his time. I know that he was just trying to get his point across (and he did), but it still made me uneasy. While the debate's content is extremely important, I believe what resinated with America was the presentation of the material. Governor Romney clearly came prepared to debate any and every topic, while President Obama lacked his spark and usual eloquence. An overwhelming majority of the country was disappointed in our President, but don't count him out of the race just yet. Although Governor Romney jumped significantly in the polls, (I'll leave the credibility for you to determine) most polls still show Obama winning the election. It's clear that both candidates still have their work cut out for them in the next 29 days.

This Thursday evening, Vice President Joe Biden and Paul Ryan will take the stage for their debate. Let's hope that both candidates come fully prepared and equipped to make their case for this country.

Just One of Those Days

2012-10-01T23:01:00.001-04:00

Welcome to October everyone! It's breast cancer awareness month and Halloween will greet us on the 31st. Unfortunately, I've been having one of those "bleh" Mondays and am having a bit of a writer's block. School has been very challenging this semester thus far, and I spend most of my days in between Calculus, Accounting, and Statistics. On these ever so rare days when I just don't have the energy or mindset to write something compelling, I feel like I still need to give you a little something. When in doubt, search YouTube for videos and hope that my readers don't get too upset with me! :)

Fall is Here! And so is TV.

2012-09-25T21:35:00.000-04:00

The first official day of Fall was three days ago, the 22nd of September. Now, with Fall comes cooler weather here in Florida, the changing colors of leaves, college and NFL football, but for many, television season premieres are the highlight of Fall. America loves its football, and we love our TV. Colleges across the United States thrive on football season and the University of Florida is no different. Every game day in Gainesville, the town shuts down and turns completely orange and blue. People come together for the common love of the Florida Gators. I've never seen anything like it. Oh, wait. Yes I have. Every game day in Tallahassee is the exact same, except with garnet and gold. (Much prettier in my opinion).

Saturday, Sunday, and Monday nights, America sits glued to their televisions watching anxiously as each and every play unfolds. This year, the replacement referees of the NFL have been causing quite the controversy as many of the calls have be clearly wrong and caused the wrong outcomes of games. During the week, however, television shows tend to dominate the evenings. This year, some of the noteworthy shows on television are:

1. NCIS. Returning for its 10th season, the #1 drama on television will undoubtedly captivate millions of American's attention, mine included. NCIS is one of my favorite shows on TV, if not my favorite, and I am anxious for it's return.

2. Modern Family. On Wednesday, Modern Family will return to ABC. Modern Family heavily dominated the Emmy's and it's no secret why. With a brilliant cast and possibly more brilliant writers, Modern Family is a comedy that's impossible not to love.

3. The X-Factor and the Voice. I group these two together for the purpose of categories. Both are signing competitions and competitors. The preference toward one or the other will most likely come from which judge panel the viewer cares for more.

4. The Big Bang Theory. Sheldon Cooper, the genius scientist, makes this nerdy comedy a show for the entire family. Well, if your family is composed of nerds. The canned laughter and the science jokes create a rather cheesy sitcom, but I absolutely love it.

5. New Girl. New Girl is back for it's second season and I couldn't be more thrilled. With a character named Schmidt, I automatically love the show. The quirky humor and charming Zooey Deschanel keep me coming back each Tuesday night for another round of laughs.

6. Revenge. Now, I have yet to see this show, but from what I have heard it is amazing. Revenge is an intense drama based on avenging the death of a loved one, and it's season two premiere has been highly anticipated.

7. Glee. Broadway on TV, almost. For those that love to sing and dance, Glee is the perfect one hour escape to sing along with the talented cast and pretend to be a Hollywood star. At least that's why I watch it...

8. The Office. This Fall, The Office will premiere its final season on the air. After 8 seasons of laughter, tears, and joy, Dwight and Jim will have their final feuds before saying goodbye to their fans. Many people have stopped watching The Office for the past year due to the departure of Michael Scott (played by Steve Carrell), but it still holds a strong fan base that I believe will carry through it's final season.

This Fall, it's clear that there are tons of television shows to watch and keep up with. Pick a few, but don't forget to spend time with friends and family or head outside for a little bit. And if you're a student like me...remember to study!

Michelle Obama Speaks at UF

2012-09-18T16:29:00.001-04:00

Yesterday, the 17th, the First Lady of the United States made her way to the O'Connell Center in Gainesville, Florida. The word that Michelle Obama would be in town spread like wildfire last Thursday. Callie (my roommate) and I waited in line for over two hours to get tickets to see Michelle Obama speak. The line was short, but moved incredibly slow. We were bombarded by people trying to get us to register to vote in Alachua County (no thank you) as well as making sure that we were indeed registered to vote somewhere. When we finally made it to the front of the line, we provided volunteers with our name and address before receiving our free ticket. We filled out the bottom as requested by the volunteers and made our way home.

The First Lady was scheduled to speak at 3:30 p.m. on Monday, September 17th. As this was a once in a lifetime opportunity, I skipped my final class of the day to go wait in line. Callie, Justin, and I arrived at the O'Connell center at 2:00 p.m. However, by this time the line had already wrapped around the parking garage and through much of the parking lot. It took us over an hour before we made it in the building. While we were waiting in line, we learned that you could not bring backpacks inside which was unfortunate considering that I just came from class. Justin, (Callie's boyfriend) kindly volunteered to take our things home and miss the speech. What a good boy. Part of me thinks that he really didn't want to go or wait in line any longer, but we won't hold that against him. ;) As Callie and I neared the front of the line, a family of four cut in front of us (and about a thousand other people) and scooted under the rope. I didn't say anything to avoid starting a fight, but I thought it was rather rude. Secret Service personnel screened us just like airport security before we entered the building. It was absolutely packed. However, the organization of this event was less than efficient, particularly the seating arrangements.

Michelle Obama did not take the stage until 4:00 pm. 30 minutes later than scheduled. I'm sure there are reasons why she was so late, but I was still a tad peeved to be waiting for so long. When she did walk out on stage, the crowd roared. We all stood and applauded for the First Lady. I listened intently as I want to make an informed decision this November. Here are some of the points that she made that stuck with me: 1) "We don't get anywhere on our own". Now, I'm sure this wasn't meant to be insulting, but I thought it was a little bit of a risky statement following her husbands "You didn't build this" comment. She continued to say that for every time that we accomplish something, we have a community to thank, a special teacher, or someone that helped us along the way. While that is not entirely false in my opinion, I think the statement she made was a little bit too strong. 2) The Obamas will always tell us the truth, even when it's hard to hear. Very false. No politician, Democrat or Republican, will ever tell the people the entire truth. They have a campaign to win. Politicians have two goals in life: Get elected, and get reelected. Many times, the "hard truth" wouldn't allow them to get elected, so they tell the people what they want to hear instead. That comes as no surprise to me. That's part of politics. I watch the news knowing that there is no way that I am getting the full truth and I have come to accept that. So, the fact that I am getting lied to doesn't bother me nearly as much as politicians insisting that they are telling me the truth. 3) When President Obama took office, the newspapers were using words such as "meltdown" to describe the state of the economy. Interesting. During President Obama's term, we were minutes away from a government "shutdown". 4) The slogan of "GM is alive, Osama Bin Laden is dead" continues to be used heavily through the campaign trail. 5) Women. The First Lady made many appeals to the women in the audience, countering Governor Romeny's "War on Women". 6) With ObamaCare, children can stay under their parent's insurance until the age of 26. To me, that seems a bit ridiculous. In many ways I'm sure that is helpful, but I find it to be more enabling and crippling than helpful. I don't think that that encourages independent young adults.

Florida is a battle ground state. Our votes in this election are critical. I believe this is largely why Michelle Obama came to Gainesville to speak, and Tallahassee later that same night and I don't blame her. She knows that we will have an influence on this election and she wants to make her case for "4 more years". I think Michelle Obama is a wonderful speaker, just like her husband. I also think that she is a loving, dedicated wife and that speaks volumes to me. During these last four years at the First Lady of the United States, she had made great progress in the effort to fight childhood obesity and I admire that. Following this speech, however, I am not sure that I agree with much of what was said yesterday and will be eagerly watching the debates that will begin shortly.

Happy Tuesday! Make it a great one!