Gateway Gazette Features

Weddings - Sing a Sweet Tune With Wedding Music

2011-03-17T12:07:00.000-06:00

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Music is an integral part of both the wedding ceremony and the reception. Music often conveys emotions that are difficult to put into words. Additionally, songs and music help us to remember certain key moments more easily. That's why we often associate rites of passage with the sound track of that time in our lives.

Consider the following:
The Ceremony
Can you picture the bride and her attendants walking down the aisle without any music? .....
Many couples give careful consideration to the reception music and leave the ceremony music to chance - not a good idea.
While traditionally brides enter to "Here Comes the Bride," stricter houses of worship may not allow this tune or brides simply may prefer something else. Just keep in mind the tempo and length of the song so that it will match the gait and size of the wedding party.
If your house of worship provides the musician(s), arrange to sit down with this individual to talk about styles. Perhaps you can arrange to hear the selections. Also arrange to have payment or a tip provided for his or her services.

The Reception
You will likely have more wiggle room with your choices at the reception, depending on the venue. Brides and grooms usually use live performers or DJs who play pre-recorded music. Some performers offer a combination of both.
Consider the style of your wedding. Will it be formal or informal? Traditional or contemporary? Aim for music that suits the style or theme of the wedding.
When you are choosing music, consider your tastes, but the tastes of your guests as well. While you won't be able to please each and every person, the wider the range of music you have available, the greater the chance of people getting up to dance and enjoying themselves.

Contracts
Once you decide on your ceremony and reception musicians, it's important to sign a contract and work out payment agreements. Having the information in writing protects you in case the musicians don't deliver what was expected. Here are some points that should be covered in the contracts.
*   Price, deposit amount, additional charges (travel, food requirements, etc.) and overtime rates.
*   The number of musicians who will be attending and what instruments they play, in the case of a wedding band.
*   Names of specific people you want, such as DJ, lead vocalist, emcee, and what compensation will be made if these people are not available.
*   Date and hours they'll be working.
*   Additional services, such as dramatic lighting, dancers or party favours.
*   Number of breaks and how the break time will be covered, such as with recorded music.
*   Style of dress or costumes.
*   Specific music requests and list of your wedding attendants so they'll have the right names if announcements are being made.
Be sure to ask friends, relatives and others for musician recommendations. When you attend weddings, take the cards of performers you enjoyed. Contact prospective performers early on to ensure your wedding date is available.

Weddings - Wedding Issues

2011-03-17T12:05:00.000-06:00

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5 Possible Problems And Some Advice

1. The Wedding Know-It-All
The Problem: "My future sister-in-law is telling me I shouldn't wear a white dress because it would be too harsh with my skin tone, wants to register for gifts with me (as well as tell me what to register for) and is suggesting where we honeymoon!”

The Advice: When wedding suggestions cross the line from helpful to aggravating, it's time to redirect that input so that you don't end up arguing over something that might not seem .....
so significant a few years down the line. Assign specific tasks to keep her busy but still involved, like helping you confirm orders with vendors or assembling favours.

2. The Doesn't-Know-Her-Place Wedding Guest
The Problem: "One of our guests keeps insisting that we invite everyone on her 'party guest list' to our destination wedding - I even found an open invite on her MySpace page!"

The Advice: Some wedding guests take it upon themselves to suggest a few invitees and then some guests invite everyone on the Internet. Unless you want Tom from MySpace raising a glass to toast your union, make sure it's clear that there's only one guest list for your wedding. Luckily, rationalizing a small guest list is a lot easier when you have a destination wedding - just explain that you're having an intimate wedding with close friends and family only (she should feel honoured that she's one of them!)

3. The Testy Bridesmaid
The Problem: "I love my maid of honour, but getting her in a dress that wasn't black or covered every inch of her was a task. If we found a colour or a print, she would tell me that she didn't want to take attention away from the bride.”

The Advice: If one of your bridesmaids is a little nervous about showing some skin or wearing a bold colour, it's better to find her an alternate option than to force her into something she's not comfortable with. For a modest maid of honour, make a strapless dress more conservative by incorporating a wrap, a fun cardigan or a vintage bolero jacket in a complementing shade. Or play up your colour palette in a subtler way with jewellery or hair fascinators. Look at the bright side - compromising now will give you a little leverage when you serve as a maid in her wedding.

4. The Over-Eager Wedding Guest
The Problem: "A woman my mother works with wants to do my ceremony music and a customer of my mother's always volunteers to help and acts like she is family. I hardly know her!”

The Advice: You know that expression about too many cooks in the kitchen? Meet its wedding equivalent. Having a lot of people offer to help you plan sounds like a blessing, but when assistance comes from left field, it can feel like more of a hindrance. If you feel like someone's eagerness is a bit more than you need, let her know how grateful you are for the offer, but that you're in great shape, planning-wise, and that if anything comes up that she could help with, you'll be sure to call.

5. The Children-Or-Bust Wedding Guest
The Problem: "My husband-to-be has a niece and nephew (both under five) and his sister, her husband and his parents said they would refuse to come if the children aren't allowed."

The Advice: A lot of couples choose not to invite kids to their wedding, but if you risk a boycott by some VIPs, find a way to soothe the situation. Offer to hire a babysitter and set up a private area with games, colouring books and a few comfy pillows for little ones to crash on if the reception runs past their bedtimes. Your relatives might even offer to chip in once they see how accommodating you're being, but if they don't, the extra expense will be worth bypassing the drama of a fight with your new family.

Weddings - How to plan a wedding - a Step-by-step Guide

2011-03-17T12:00:00.000-06:00

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Wedding Day Peace of Mind - Priceless!

Twelve months before the Wedding
Get yourself a binder with paper and dividing tabs.
Discuss with your fiancé and his/her families, plus your own, to determine a budget.
Decide on your wedding theme e.g. Christmas, Fall, Snowflakes, Black and White, etc.
Select a wedding date with your fiancé and families.
Decide on your wedding attendants.
Book a ceremony and reception location(s).
Book your professional wedding photographer, florist, caterer, videographer, and DJ or wedding musicians.
.....

Nine months before the Wedding
Make an appointment with your officiant. For most religious ceremonies, you may be required to attend pre-wedding counseling. For civil ceremonies, your officiant may require a meeting to discuss your wedding ceremony.
Wedding gown shopping and first fittings should be looked after at this time.
Shop for your wedding accessories, wedding veil or head piece and wedding shoes.
Begin preparation of the guest list. Be sure to include both sides of the family as guest lists are often a contentious issue. It will take time to decide on long lost cousins, work friends, neighbours, etc.
Decide on gift registry locations and register.
Begin your search for your honeymoon location. If you are getting married during a peak holiday season such as Christmas, you may need to book your honeymoon up to nine months in advance.

Six months before the Wedding
You need to meet with the wedding professionals who will assist you on your special day. The menu should be mapped out with your catering company, a review of requested wedding photos with your photographer, flower choices with your florist, a discussion with your videographer on the amount of footage and locations for videos and your preference for music with your DJ or wedding musicians.
Limousines and/or other wedding transportation should be booked. Wedding carriages or winter horse drawn sleighs should be booked and pricing confirmed.
If you are ordering wedding invitations and/or save the date cards and wedding announcements, you need to decide on a provider. If you are making your own wedding invitations and other wedding stationery, you should choose a wedding invitation kit template package. Announcements should be sent out to those friends and family who you have not included in the ceremony.
Honeymoon trip should be booked and final budget plans for the honeymoon confirmed.
Bridesmaids and Flower Girl dresses should be decided upon and ordered.
Start shopping for wedding rings.

Three months before the Wedding
Guest list needs to be finalized by you and your fiancé and BOTH families. We can't emphasize enough that you need to have the blessing of all concerned when it comes to the guest list.
Final decisions and ordering of wedding rings.
Visit hairstylist for a consultation and have your first wedding day hair run through.
Make wedding day appointment with hairstylist. Don't forget to include your bridesmaids if they are having their hair professionally styled for your wedding.
Research and review requirements for blood tests.
Research, review and book hotel rooms for out of town guests who may require accommodation.
Follow up on your wedding gown and confirmation of delivery dates for your gown and those of your attendants.
Attend your first wedding gown fitting including all accessories and shoes.

Six to eight weeks before the Wedding
Prepare your wedding invitation kit templates for printing, including the Thank You cards.
If you have ordered your invites from a commercial business, be sure they are ready for you.
Address and mail the wedding invitations.
Shop for and purchase any wedding gifts for your fiancé, attendants, parents and grandparents.
Attend your final dress fitting including wedding accessories.
Spend time wearing your wedding shoes so that you are not crippled before the wedding dance starts.
Test a spray on tan if you plan to tan for your wedding.
Make final decisions on your wedding hair style and any hair colour changes should be made.
Pick up your wedding rings from your jewellery shop.
Print out your personalized Thank You cards from your wedding invitation kit templates or purchase generic Thank You cards.
Send any Thank You cards for wedding or shower gifts received over the past weeks.

10 - 14 Days before the Wedding
Confirm with your caterer with one final review of the menu.
Confirm with your officiant the venue and time of ceremony.
Confirm with your photographer, florist, videographer, DJ and/or wedding band.
Confirm your honeymoon reservation and any special requests for the wedding night.
Address any wedding announcements, stamp and set in preparation of mailing on your wedding day.
Final visit to your hairstylist to review any last minute concerns or changes.

One week before the Wedding
Attend any last minute parties or bridal showers in your honour.
Write any Thank You cards for gifts received at these functions.
Give the caterer your final number of guests expected to attend.
Bridesmaids and Flower Girl confirmation of the time they are expected to arrive.
Purchase travel insurance for the honeymoon if you are leaving the country.
Purchase travelers' cheques for the honeymoon holiday. Double check to be sure that travelers' cheques are accepted and easily cashed at your final destination.

Weddings - Superstitions and Trivia

2011-03-17T11:57:00.000-06:00

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Wedding Bands
The ancient Egyptians began the practice of wearing a wedding band. It was a symbol of unending love, since the ring has no beginning and no end. Giving a wedding band of gold represented purity. In medieval England, the practice of wearing the ring on the third finger of the left hand was because of the belief that the veins in the left hand led directly to the heart. By wearing the ring on this finger, the couple were "joined at the heart."

Best Man.....
It was in ancient Germany that the Western European tradition of a Best Man began. In olden days it was sometimes necessary for a man to kidnap his bride from a neighboring village and he needed his strongest friend (his Best Man) to help with the kidnapping and to stand by him at the wedding ceremony to fight off any relatives that might try to take her back.

Engagement Rings
The giving of an "engagement" ring was first practiced when the groom "purchased" his bride. By giving a token, such as a ring, he pledged to marry her in return for her dowry and social status, among other things. The tradition of giving a diamond began with the Italians. It was believed that diamonds were created from the "flames of love" and represented everlasting love.

Boutonnière
It was the knights of yore who gave us the Western European tradition of the groom wearing a single flower. It was customary for a knight to wear a flower or a colorful handkerchief belonging to their lady fair when they entered a tournament. The tradition later evolved to the groom wearing a flower from his bride's wedding bouquet.

Superstitions Abound
Believe it or not, there were also superstitions on the day and month that a couple wed on

Monday for wealth
Tuesday for health
Wednesday the best day of all
Thursday for losses
Friday for crosses
Saturday for no luck at all

Married when the year is new, he'll be loving, kind and true.
When February birds do mate, You wed nor dread your fate.
If you wed when March winds blow, joy and sorrow both you'll know.
Marry in April when you can, Joy for Maiden and for Man.
Marry in the month of May, and you'll surely rue the day.
Marry when June roses grow, over land and sea you'll go.
Those who in July do wed, must labour for their daily bred.
Whoever wed in August be, many a change is sure to see.
Marry in September's shrine, your living will be rich and fine.
If in October you do marry, love will come but riches tarry.
If you wed in bleak November, only joys will come, remember.
When December snows fall fast, marry and true love will last.

Something old
something new
something borrowed
something blue

The white wedding gown was not a symbol of purity, but rather a symbol of joy.
What wedding today would be complete without the white wedding gown? Prior to the 16th century, however, this most important Western European Wedding tradition was not common. It wasn't until Ann of Brittany popularized the white wedding dress in 1499 that the tradition became part of Western European wedding culture.

And finally it is time for the groom to carry his new bride across the threshold
And finally, what wedding tradition would be complete without the groom carrying his new bride over the threshold of their home? This Western European tradition began with two beliefs. The first one was that if the bride were to trip or stumble as she entered her new home (as she crossed her new threshold for the first time) bad luck would plague the marriage. The second belief was that evil spirits inhabited the threshold of a new couple's home and that if the bride stepped on the threshold the evil spirits would enter through her feet and the marriage would be doomed. The romantic answer, of course, was for the groom to carry his new bride across the threshold.

Weddings - Valley Vines by Sarah Harrold

2011-03-17T11:42:00.000-06:00

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A California Wine With A Western Spirit

Are you stuck in a wine “rut?” Do you wander around the wine racks in your local liquor store looking at every bottle, occasionally thinking “I wonder what that one tastes like?” or “that one looks interesting,” but in the end you always grab that same familiar label? .....

Maybe it's a comfort thing; you know exactly what you are getting every time you open the bottle. Perhaps you just really love the taste and no matter how many times you enjoy a glass, it never seems to get old. Then again, you could be just like the majority of the population and have a fear of change. Whether it's twelve, twenty or thirty dollars, no one likes to pay for a product and not know if they are going to love it or end up dumping it down the kitchen sink.

I can help; my name is Sarah Harrold from Valley Cold Beer and Liquor in Turner Valley. My plan is to showcase some of the many wonderful wines out there and to help you break out of your “wine comfort zone.” After all, if you never try anything new, you will really be missing out on some wonderful wines. Please keep an open mind; wine is a personal preference, but there are many products to choose from.

My first wine to showcase is the 2008 Lucky Horseshoe Merlot from Hayes Ranch, located in Livermore in the North Central Coast region of California. This area of California has warm days, cool nights and a long growing season, which develops ripe, round, fruit flavours. Produced by the Wente Family Estates and represented by Simmer Fine Wine & Spirits Inc, Lucky Horseshoe has a varietal content of 85% Merlot, 15% Petite Sirah and an alcohol content of 13.5%. This Merlot has exciting hints of spice and berries, which exhibits aromas of plum, bramble and a hint of herbaceousness. With medium tannins and a smooth, long, fruity finish on the palate, this is definitely a delightful wine!

This Merlot will be best paired with roast beef, tenderloin, pork, any pasta with a meat sauce or hard cheeses. Personally, I prefer to enjoy a glass on its own, surrounded by friends. Priced below sixteen dollars, I highly recommend the Lucky Horseshoe Merlot.

Visit us on our website at www.valleyliquor.ca or email info@valleyliquor.ca for more information on the upcoming in store tasting and specials for this wine.

Please enjoy responsibly. Don't drink and drive.

Weddings - Receiving Line: Etiquette, Options & Tips

2011-03-17T11:37:00.000-06:00

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What they say about weddings is true: It'll all be over before you know it. So then how can you ensure you'll get the chance to talk to each and every guest before the bell tolls? Enter the receiving line - the most formal and efficient line dance you'll ever do. Here's how to connect with your company and give guests your most heartfelt greetings and gratitude.

Why Have One? .....
A receiving line is the best opportunity to greet each guest individually and thank him or her for coming to your wedding. And if you're having more than 50 guests, it's considered proper etiquette. The line also guarantees your guests a minute of face-to-face time with you, a chance to hug, kiss and congratulate you both, and to say things like "The ceremony was lovely." If you rely instead on the more casual greet-them-as-you-see-them approach, you may spend the whole party in a tailspin, ducking out of conversations to say hello to people you haven't greeted yet, and inevitably you'll end up missing someone.

When and Where?
Generally the receiving line is formed immediately following the ceremony or at the beginning of the reception. You'll want to take spatial constraints into consideration when choosing where to line up so that family and bridal party members aren't standing on top of each other and guests have room to move in a smooth, orderly procession (which in turn makes the line go faster so you can all get on to the party). Proper ventilation is also crucial to avoid sweaty brows and swooning bridesmaids. The most commonly used ceremony site areas include the hallway or vestibule at the head of the aisle, outside the entry doors, down the front steps or on the front porch. At your reception site the options are many, depending on the party space: consider the cocktail lounge, the lobby, just outside the doors leading into the main room or the reception room itself, perhaps on the dance floor. Ultimately, pick a spot where you and your guests can stand comfortably for the duration.

Who Stands in it?
Traditionally, the bride's parents, as hosts, head the receiving line and are first to greet guests, followed by the bride and groom and then the groom's parents. Many lines we've seen also include the entire bridal party (if there's room) and sometimes even grandparents (if they're able). Today, however, with more couples contributing to or paying for their own weddings, the lines have blurred (so to speak). The couple may wish to stand alone, especially if the majority of guests are their friends or they may stand with just the moms while the dads circulate among and welcome the crowd during the cocktail hour.

Divorced and Remarried Parents
This may be one of the stickier situations you'll encounter when orchestrating the big day and the resolution often depends on the relationships between the relevant parties. If your parents are divorced, they should not stand next to one another in line - even if they are sharing hosting duties - as this gives the impression that they are still a couple. Instead, place Mom on one side of you and the groom, then the groom's parents, then Dad. If this arrangement doesn't sit well, consider placing another family member or an honour attendant between them. And what about stepparents? Should you include them too? That depends: Do you have a good relationship with them? Is your mom/dad capable of sharing this duty with your step mom/dad with civility and grace? You should strive to make everyone feel as comfortable as possible. If this arrangement gets the green light, simply have your father stand with his new wife, and your mother with her new husband. This way guests will understand the relationships.

Introductions All Around
The receiving line is where your hosting duties as the bride and groom kick off. It'll no doubt be a whirlwind of faces, but as much as possible you should introduce your new spouse and your parents to all the guests they have not yet met. First names and the guests' relationships to you should suffice. Likewise all guests should take it upon themselves to offer this same information as introduction to attendants and family members whom they've never met as they proceed down the line; simply shake hands, offer congratulations and keep moving. The bride and groom need only accept everyone's hugs, kisses and best wishes and thank them for coming. It's that simple. And yes, you'll end up with a lot of lipstick on your cheeks, but fear not - you're allowed to make a bathroom pit stop before heading to the party.

Variations on a Theme
As is common nowadays, traditions such as the receiving line are ultimately open to interpretation. Depending on the size of your guest list, you may opt to greet guests in other ways. One couple we know personally dismissed guests from their seats right after the ceremony, one row at a time (although we wouldn't recommend this for gatherings of more than 150 people, or if guests have to remain seated - and suffer - through hot sun, rain, strong winds or other inclement conditions). If you have fewer than 50 guests, you might decide to turn cocktail hour into the meet-and-greet opportunity instead of a formal receiving line. Whatever you choose, the basic tenets still apply: Greet each of your guests in turn and thank them for joining you on this joyful occasion.

- The Knot