I am reading a wonderful book about the teacher student relationship in Vajrayana Buddhism. These are my favorite quotes:

"The vajra master is dangerous in the sense of the danger a vaccuum cleaner poses to a carpet, or that a bath poses to body odour. The Lama is dangerous to our dualistic conceptions-but beyond that, he or she is the compassionate surgeon who saves our lives. The surgeon's knife cuts us open-but if there's a cancer to be removed, then the operation is to be welcomed." Trungpa Rinpoche

"The Lama is the ecstatic, wild, and gentle figure who short-circuits your systems of self-referencing. The Lama is the only person in your life who cannot be manipulated. The Lama is the invasion of unpredictability you allow into your life, to enable you to cut through the convolutions of interminable psychological and emotional processes. The Lama is the terrifyingly compassionate gamester, who re-shuffles the deck of your carefully arranged rationale. To enter into vajra commitment is to leap from the perfect precipice. To find yourself in the radiant space of this choiceless choice, is the very heart of Tantra. To leap open-eyed into the shining emptiness of the Lama's wisdom display, and to experience the ecstatic impact of each dynamic gesture of the Lama's method display is the essential luminosity and power of the path." Ngak'chang Rinpoche

"Among the false tertons there are many who are harmonious with people, who seem to have disciplined conduct, and are fortunate and charismatic. At the same time, among the authentic tertons there are many who are loose in speech and behavior and who, without the least hesitation, get involved in many activities that people will condemn. In that way the tertons take many grave obstructions of the doctrine on themselves in the form of infamy and ill repute and they use them for the practice of taking every experience in the great equal taste. One cannot judge tertons as inauthentic because of their imperfect mercurial character, even to to the slightest extent."  Do-drupchen Rinpoche

"If those who lack realization form a committee which sets up standards to which their teacher must conform, then what could such teachers teach that such students could not teach themselves- without the necessity of having a teacher? If the committee is composed of realized beings, why should they dictate the behavior of other realized beings-when they understand that realized behavior is unbounded? If they do not understand that realized behavior is unbounded, then they are evidently not realized and therefore disqualified from making any comment on those who are." Ngak'chang Rinpoche and Khandro De'chen

We the people need to insist that our government rules like Gandhi. Truth makes non-violence possible. Governments with secrets can't be trusted.

The creative urge, constant craving, the desire to do something different, is the reality of existence. Mastery requires commitment and focus until perfection is complete.

Some one asked me for advice because his friends keep telling him that he ought to hire a masseuse that provides happy endings, but he can't find one. He wanted to know if I could please tell him how he can make sure he is going to get his penis rubbed, if he makes an appointment to get a massage, as therapists keep hanging up on him when he asks.

This is what I told him-

"As absurd as it may seem, having sexual contact with the intention of sexual arousal or sexual gratification in exchange for money, is illegal.

What two people do in private, however, once they have gotten to know each other, is a matter of personal choice. You and your masseuse can have sex, if you want, as long as it occurs after the massage is over, and there is no additional charge for it. But asking a perfect stranger to provide sexual services over the telephone is not only rude, insensitive, and illegal, it is stupid. And nobody wants to massage stupid people.

My advice is that you become willing to invest in a massage, or two, or three, and get to know the therapists professionally. Who knows? One of them might like you and enjoy serving your needs. But if you continue seeking what you are looking for in the manner that you are going about it, you are more likely to get arrested, than what you want.

If I were looking for an open-minded massage therapist, I would consider the price, how long she has been in business, whether or not she requires draping, as well as whether she works out of her home, or an office. Another way to increase your odds of picking a masseuse who enjoys going above and beyond the call of duty, is to join a website that allows customers to post reviews of massage service providers. Then you can talk to members behind closed doors and find out who they recommend. But don't ever forget that your mileage may vary.

Massage therapists are human beings with individual tastes and preferences. They are NOT the slaves of their potential clients sexual needs. It is impossible to know, without meeting someone in person, and getting to know them, whether or not it would be comfortable proceeding to something more intimate than a massage.

If you want a massage therapist to promise that she will provide sexual contact without meeting you, how can she be sure you won't show up filthy? People who ask perfect strangers to break the law over the telephone are much more likely to do that, you know. And how can she be sure that you won't have sores, or warts on your penis? Or that you don't have a horrible contagious crotch rash?

Would you send money in advance to secure an appointment with somebody who promised to provide you with sexual gratification? What if she was sick and filthy when she opened the door? What if her house smelled horrible? Would you go in and collect your pre-paid sexual gratification anyway? I think not. So why are you looking for somebody who will indiscriminately promise to do something illegal with strangers who call on the telephone? Is that the kind of person you really want massaging your penis? I hope not.

I encourage you to rearrange your priorities and have more reasonable expectations. You are being indiscrete. You are making an illegal request. People who make such requests are either police officers looking to arrest someone, or simply ignorant people so desperate for sexual contact they will take stupid risks. People who repeatedly take stupid risks eventually get arrested. And sometimes the cops offer to drop the charges on stupid people who get themselves busted, if they will work under cover and snitch out prostitutes. Does that sound like fun to you? If so, you are a dangerous person, and nobody wants to massage dangerous people.

If you can find somebody who is willing to promise sexual contact if you buy a massage, it will most likely be an undercover cop pretending to be a masseuse, and you will get arrested. My recommendation is that you stop seeking guarantees and start trusting in your ability to make friends and influence people. Embrace the mystery. Would it really be so terribly bad to recieve a few massages without any happy endings in order to find somebody who likes your energy, enjoys your company, and feels inspired to serve you in such a manner?

When you make illegal requests of perfect strangers over the telephone, you are conveying a disturbing sense of neediness and hunger, and you are unlikely to find anyone who is willing to serve you. Massage therapists are educated professionals. They expect to be treated with respect. Asking them to break the law is not only indiscrete and risky, it is disrespectful. Massage therapists offer a legitimate service. It is not prostitution.

If your sexual need is so intense that the promise of prostitution is the only thing that will do, then go to an impoverished business district and look around for young women dressed up in skimpy outfits standing on the street corners, with unemployed men watching out for them. They will make you a deal. Their pimps will beat them up if they don't.

You are much more likely to find what you are looking for, if you don't ask. The same is true when shopping for escorts. There simply aren't any guarantees. And until society chooses to decriminalize the exchange of sexual contact for money, there won't be any. I wish you luck finding what you are looking for."

Marianne Fictitious became a massage therapist and enthusiastically began practicing massage. She hadn't worked at the Spa very long when her wrist began to ache. It was time to move the practice home. She would charge the same, and make twice as much on her own.

She didn't have enough "regulars "to support her yet. It would be unethical for her to take clients with her when she left, because the Spa invested the advertising money to bring them in. She would have to start over, and develop her own customer base.

After placing ads in several places Marianne's phone began to ring. Much to her surprise, most of the calls were from men. They were asking strange questions that surprised her.

"Do you do full body massage?" they said.
"Of course, is there any other kind?" she replied.
"Do you require draping?"

The word "require" confused her. The massage school taught her it was unethical NOT to drape. But she was losing 3-4 customers every day because people didn't want to be draped. She began to wonder about the ethics of instilling shame in massage therapists for honoring client preferences. 

There was an unusual tone in some of the callers voices that made her uncomfortable. It quickly became apparent that some of them just wanted to talk to her on the phone. They were not interested in making an appointment. The hunger and need they conveyed was disturbing. The impoverished state of the human condition made her sad and angry.

Marianne quickly realized she would have to get a job doing something else in order to make ends meet, or start massaging people who didn't want to be draped. She chose the latter. At first she wasn't sure if it was the worst, or the best decision of her life.

To be continued....

Blair isn't sure why some men like to put their hands around her throat and pretend they are choking her, but they do. Fortunately it doesn't happen very often, and nobody has ever harmed her. When it does happen, which is rarely, she is always surprised, but not frightened. She says fear doesn't arise because of the state she is in when she meets a misogynist.

Blair is empathic. Being in the presence of somebody who hates women makes her wish she was dead. Misogynists can't derive any pleasure from killing a woman, who would rather be dead anyway. Fortunately, these deranged states of living hell are just temporary. Blair's desire to be dead always passes quickly. And when she is in the presence of a philogynist, she is happy to be alive.

She just wishes there were more of them on the planet.

When people shake hands, hug or have sexual intercourse an exchange of energy occurs. Orgasm causes the energy exchange to increase significantly during sex. Mutual simultaneous orgasm results in a complete union of souls. The two become one. If nobody has an orgasm, the energy exchange that occurs during sex is negligible, no more than a handshake.

In order for human beings to achieve their potential as sexual beings, mutual simultaneous orgasm must occur. Coming together in such a manner is an extremely complex and subtle accomplishment, one that most people have only experienced via fantasy. To achieve the ideal, skill and competence are greater assets than luck.

Sexercise is important for overall health. It keeps the gonads toned and oxygenated. Carrying babies in their wombs does this for women. But men can't get pregnant. That is why they need sex more than women do. Men will make temporary commitments, if necessary, for the privilege of having sex on a repeated and regular basis, even when they don't want a family. 

That is why Prostitution is the oldest profession, because having sex is crucial to the health and well being of mankind. It is what kept cave men from killing their wives and families and taking more attractive women during primitive times. Prostitution prevented the human race from becoming extinct. But there are so many people on the planet now that more consciousness is being required to preserve the species. Profane prostitution isn't enough to save us any more. Elevated awareness is needed. People know this. That is why Tantra has become so popular.

Sexual intimacy without skill and competence involves grotesque forms of awkwardness and encompasses perversion. The moral majority has traditionally considered abstinence to be the only viable alternative. The emergence of tantric teaching is an indication that society is ready to embrace sexual practice as a legitimate means of confidence building and skill development. 

Copulation without commitment or compensation requires an alignment of intention to remain balanced. People have sex for different reasons. If one person is having sex to relieve the stress of inexperience, and another is having sex to bond intimately, stress will be transferred to the person who's intimacy needs are frustrated when the relationship is over.

Sacred prostitutes are willing to embrace and endure the awkwardness of inexperience in order to teach skills and heal the wounds of sexual repression. Should society view them as criminals because they have a desire to be compensated for this service to humanity?

In hive cultures, the leader dictates specific behavior. Individuality is sacrificed for the sake of the group. Button pushing is used to test integration. The goal is total assimilation, achieved by the elimination of feelings. There is an inherent lack of compassion mistaken for enlightenment.

The need to control orgasmic bliss is due to an awareness of the laws that govern chaos.

Formation and colonization is inevitable because nature abhors a vaccuum. Only those with an experience of complete emptiness can appreciate the ultimate good fortune in all of this. The gift is to contemplate whether suffering is needed as a reference point to know joy. The challenge is to abandon unnecessary suffering.

Many people believe that large families were a tradition in the past because the more kids you had, the greater chances that one of them would be successful and take good care of you in your old age.  But there were other compelling reasons for a large family tradition, too. The bedrock basic one is that men who marry, tend to do so because they want somebody to have sex with on a repeated and regular basis. Marriage gives men a sense of entitlement.  Having sex frequently prior to vasectomies, tubal litigations and the birth control pill, resulted in a whole lot of kids. Wives were afraid to say no to sex because men might leave them for somebody else. The more kids you had, the less likely he would be to abandon you for someone else and start a new family.

Trina was a precocious teenager, who thought her step father was attractive. Her mother was strict and didn't want her dating. One day when frustrated and angry at her Mom, Trina acted out and flirted with her "Dad." She expected him to tell her that she'd been inappropriate, and some day she would meet someone her own age to love. He didn't. Much to her surprise, he began to spend more time at home when her Mother was at work. Dad said he didn't want her to be ashamed of what had happened, that it was perfectly natural, but her Mother probably wouldn't understand. Trina promised not to tell, because her mother didn't understand anything that Trina did.

Trina had a crush on her Dad for several months and felt jealous when he showed affection toward her Mother, but what could she say or do? So she turned her attention towards Lenny, a boy her own age at school. When her mother wouldn't let her go out with Lenny, Trina couldn't suppress the anger she felt. She told her mother that she had been kissing and fondling her Dad for months, so why should going out with Lenny should be such a big deal? Her mother was shocked and threatened to have Trina's Dad thrown in prison.

Trina didn't want that to happen. So she told her Mom that she was just acting out in anger, and she was never really involved with her Dad. Trina's Dad began to intervene on Trina's behalf and encouraged Trina's Mother to let her date. But he kept finding opportunities to spend time alone with Trina, too.
Trina didn't want to be alone with her Dad any more, but she endured it because she didn't want her mother to send him to prison.

Trina is twenty five years old now. She lives alone and thinks the penalty for molesting children is too harsh. If she hadn't been worried about her mother sending her father to prison, her whole family could have gotten some counseling, she explains. She would have seen to it. But the punishment didn't seem to fit the crime, and she wasn't willing to press the issue. She became her step Dad's mistress instead.

I don't like eating at most healthy food restaurants because their soy sauce gives me a migraine, their beans and greens blow me up like a blimp with painful gas, the arginine content of brown rice is so high that I get a herpes attack, and bell peppers have a whang that makes me feel sick when I taste it. So I prefer to buy organic vegetables at the farmers market and eat healthy things at home.

When eating out, I take a hand full of vitamins and go to a regular place. A mustard burger and a lemon berry slush from Sonic are a lot better for me than something touted as healthy that is guaranteed to make me feel sick. Sonic delivers my food in less than a minute and their burgers don't give me gas. So tie me up, beat me and call me a hypocrite. I don't care.

My most favorite SAD (Standard American Diet) restaurant in the state of Texas is The Golden Corral at Ben White and S. Lamar. They have a wonderful buffet, the best bread pudding I've ever tasted, and their yeast rolls are as good as my grandmothers, may God rest her soul. My favorite waiter in the whole world also works there. His name is Keith. For only a $3 tip he kisses me on the cheek, calls me "Miss Gayle," tells me I'm pretty, remembers the name of my favorite dog that died years ago, and attends my needs with so much care that I feel like the Queen of England. Now that is some good service.