Ms. D was not only a principal, but also a friend and mentor to many for the 35 years that she ran the school. She was the very first feminist I had ever encountered. Tolerance, acceptance, generosity, modesty and thinking outside the box were instilled in our little 4 year old brains, and we were reminded almost every day that we were independent individuals and the only thing that stood in our way is ourselves. My favorite memory is of her telling me “when faced with authority, question it and fight it, but never conform to it.” Basically, she told me to be a rebel. And that’s exactly what I have been my entire life.

She was an Ursula like character, with a booming voice that could scare even a lion. She could make any person weak in the knees. Including me… I had a special relationship with Ms. D because I spent a lot of time pacing nervously outside her office, waiting to be dismissed. Yes, I was a horrible student who was always sent to the principal because no one could handle me. But I also played a lot of professional tennis and was thus on the road three months of the school year. So asking for her permission for leave was how I learnt about the true person she was. She respected me for my decision to pursue tennis, and because I was not the average bookworm. I reported to her after every tournament and after every exam cycle. My grades fluctuated immensely but she never paid attention to it. Not even when a teacher threatened to fail me, did Ms. D tell me to apply myself to academics. She waited for me to fall and learn, all the while keeping a protecting eye on me. When I fell, which I eventually did, and had to quit tennis, I told her of my decision. She looked at me that day, smiled and went about her work. From a woman who doesn’t smile, this was clearly a big deal!

While the anecdotes are endless, what I realized today was that she was my parent and there has always been a little part of her inside me, preventing me from ever giving up and inspiring me to be an independent soul. I realized that there was so much about my life that I had not told her. Most importantly that I was gay! We haven’t spoken in years, but for some reason this was important to me. And that is exactly what I did. I got an A4 paper and on it I wrote on it “It’s important to me that you know. I am gay and I have the courage to live my life no matter what society throws my way. This courage within me could only have come from the 12 years I spent under your wing. I am unsure what you would have said if I had told you this in person, but I know that I would have cracked another smile out of you.” And that’s when I cried.

As I walked up to her office for a final goodbye, I could feel her presence embedded in the school stone structure. Her office door so familiar, I even remember the font in which a sticker on her door once read “Please do not disturb.” Cancelling the ‘not’ was Ms. D’s doing. As I walked out of my stone home of 12 years, I never felt more inspired to live my life to make Ms. D proud. And I know one day she will crack a smile at me from heaven.

Just to share, this was her favorite prayer:

May the road rise to meet you.

May the wind be always at your back.

May the sun shine warm upon your face;

The rains fall soft upon your fields and until we meet again,

May God hold you in the palm of His hand.

Trikone Chicago <http://www.trikonechicago.org/> presents our bi
monthly fundraiser with special tribute to Lahore Vagistan who has
returned to us!

Get your groove on while DJ Mozes spins the sexiest Bollywood sounds.

Friday May 18th, 2012, 10pm – 2am @ Big Chicks, 5024 N Sheridan Rd, Chicago

$5 suggested donation. Special performances by Lahore Vagistan at midnight!

“Human beings are all members of one body.
They are created from the same essence.
When one member is in pain,
The others cannot rest.
If you do not care about the pain of others,
You are not worthy of being called a human.”

Homosexuality is found in 450 species and homophobia is found in just one, humans. Its hightime we open our hearts and accept people for what they are, and help them to stop living a lie.

Chennai Dost invites you to join hands for “Stop Homophobia/Transphobia” – a Candlelight Vigil on May 17th, International Day against Homophobia/ Transphobia. Irrespective of gender, sexuality and other differences, let us all unite to celebrate the diversity and put an end to the inhumane act– Homophobia / Transphobia. Let the light we hold, bring an end to the darkness that dwell in many hearts and parts of our society. This is an effort of Chennai Dost, to increase the awareness on alternate sexuality & gender issues and to develop a better tomorrow in which no individual is discriminated or humiliated of one’s gender or sexuality. Let us try and build a society in which no one is forced to hide behind a mask and let everyone live with the dignity of who they are.

Come let’s all get united and show our solidarity to STOP HOMOPHOBIA / TRANSPHOBIA.

VENUE: Opposite Chennai Press Club.
DATE: May 17th.
TIME: 6 pm.

1.

AUGUST
(2011) 100 min / Feature USA Dir: Eldar Rapaport

Two former lovers, Troy and Jonathan, reunite after a long-ago painful breakup. After spending several years in Spain, Troy returns to Los Angeles and decides to phone Jonathan and meet for coffee. A seemingly innocent rendezvous turns into an attempt to revive the past. Only this time it’s not that simple, as Jonathan has a new beau, Raul, and is trying to make the right decision a second time around. The film jumps times and perspectives and offers overlapping story lines to project circular feel and repetitiveness. With subtlety, “August” explores themes of timing, interlacing of emotions, and the complexity of making choices. It won the Best Feature at Iris Prize, the world’s biggest LGBT prize.

2.
Centerpiece Feature

GIGOLA
(2010) 102 min / Feature FRANCE Dir: Laure Charpentier

Set in 1960′s underbelly of Paris, adapted and directed by Laure Charpentier from her own novel, Gigola is a story of a mercurial woman who abandons herself to the sensual world of Sapphic desire. After her lover’s suicide, an emotionally aloof Georgina butches up as Gigola and becomes part of the notorious nocturnal life of Place Pigalle. Her encounters with an infatuated and aristocratic Odette who keeps showering her with
riches, makes her wealthy. Using that money she tries to free a fellow prostitute from an Italian gangster-pimp’s ownership, and in the process falls in love with both of them. Starring the gorgeous Lou Doillon who exudes sensuality and vulnerability equally and the rugged and handsome Eduardo Noriega (whose film ‘Burnt Money’ is also screening at KASHISH this year), the film even has a saucy musical number performed at a lesbian nightclub. Celebrated French actress Marissa Perdes makes a fabulous cameo as Odette, a wealthy, older aristocrat who lavishes Gigola with money and sports car in return for sexual favours. This movie is classy and saucy with an interesting take on hustling.

3.
MEN TO KISS (Original Title: Maenner Zum Knutschen)
(2012) 83 min / Feature GERMANY Dir: Robert Hasfogel

A tale of chaotic relationship of the unequal couple of Ernst and Tobias. Though opposites attract, respectable banker Ernst is often unsure, whether bubbly and always cheerful Tobias takes their relationship as seriously as he does. Soon their relationship is put to a test by the sudden visit of Ernst’s eccentric female friend, Uta. She schemes to drive a wedge between the pair, forcing Tobias to rise to the challenge, with a little help from his friends to checkmate this unwelcome guest. An upbeat sitcom with a fun ensemble cast and vibrant images of gay Berlin make it a memorable tale of love, friendship and loyalty. It’s a time to laugh, cry and fall in love.

4.
MY LAST ROUND (Original Title: Mi Último Round)
(2011) 87 min / Feature CHILE, ARGENTINA Dir: Julio Jorquera Arriagada

Every chance is worth fighting for! Set in a machismo-centric town of Southern Chile where homosexuality is taboo, the film follows the love story between Hugo, a young kitchen hand and Octavio, a middle-aged local boxing champion. When Octavio is advised never to box again for risk of permanent brain damage, the couple moves to the capital Santiago, hoping to live their love – secretly defying it from the hostile outside. But nothing turns out as planned: the romantic advances from his new boss’s daughter threaten to unravel Hugo’s relationship with Octavio, while also serving as the catalyst to drive Octavio back into the ring for one last fight. My Last Round is an astounding and heartfelt story from Latin America, a quiet, sure-handed meditation on a working class relationship between two men.

5.
THE OWLS
(2010) 66 min / Feature USA Dir: Cheryl Dunye

OWLs stands for Older Wiser Lesbians, aging revolutionaries who are caught between a culture that still has no place for them, and a younger generation indifferent to their contributions. This film, an experimental thriller/ film noir is about four OWLs who accidentally kill a young lesbian and hide the body, without reporting it to the authorities. Their guilt and long-kept, dark secret comes back to haunt them, as an unexpected stranger shows up in their lives, bringing tension and discord. Little do they know that this mysterious stranger has a plan which includes all four of them. A funny, humane look at the bonds that restrain, and the dreams that remain. Created through a participatory filmmaking process with an all women cast and crew, ‘The OWLs’ is a narrative/documentary hybrid style that entwines scripted dramatic action with commentary by characters and actors. In this way, the literal collective of lesbian/queer artists who made The OWLs also influence the meaning of the film, reflecting the community relationships that have been so defining in the growth of this generation.

6.
WE THE OUTSIDERS (Original Title: Aamhi Ka Tisre)
(2011) 109 min / Feature INDIA Dir: Ramesh Laxman More

Inspired by the life of India’s most well known transgender person Laxmi Narayan Tripathi, the film is a poignant tale of the stigma and discrimination faced by transgenders among their families and in society; and how with the help of a support structure, they can be empowered too. Bablu, an adoloscent, encounters a strange feeling of being a woman trapped in a man`s body. And with this, begins his painful journey. Abandoned by the family and the society, Bablu has nobody to turn up to, except for the community of eunuchs. He takes refuge in their world which is a very different world altogether, with a different system and different traditions. But here he finds love, courage and inspiration from Anu, an outspoken transgender activist who is fighting with the society for assertion of identity and rights. Anu and her followers challenge the society and system and seek recognition and respect for their existence within the social mainstream. Featuring a cast from Marathi film and theater, ‘We The Outsiders’ is a realistic portrayal of the third gender.

7.
FAMILY KHUSREYAN DI
(2009) 95 min / Feature INDIA Dir: B. D. Sharma

A blockbuster comedy that KASHISH has dug out from the Punjabi mainstream cinema! Moti Dogar, the local Robin Hood of a village is shot down while saving his entire village from being sold to the Village headman. Subedaar Tota Singh, a retired army man manages to keep Moti’s death a secret. Before the headman’s goons could forcibly get the entire village vacated, Tota Singh even finds a look-alike of Moti. The only hitch is that the look-alike is a hijra. Will this hijra be man enough to save the villagers from getting homeless? The film’s ‘right-in-your face’ comedy punctuated with songs and even a laughter track, is surely not niche cinema, but a not-to-be missed film just because it has its heart in right place. For once, this is a film that doesn’t cry about how society treats hijras, but where hijras are needed by the society!

8.
TALES OF THE WARIA
(2011) 56 min / Documentary USA Dir: Kathy Huang

Indonesia is home to the world’s largest Muslim population. It is also home to a community of transgender individuals known as Warias, biological men who live openly as women. TALES OF THE WARIA follows four characters from this little-known community as they search for romance and intimacy. At times comical and at times heartbreaking, the film uncovers a world that not only defies our expectations of gender and religion, but also reveals our endless capacity as human beings to search for love – whatever the consequences. This eye-opening multiple award documentary, shot in the scenic coastal region of South Sulawesi, takes us to nightclubs, salons, and into the characters’ homes and hearts, to offer glimpse of a life, culture and community that is rarely talked about and often misunderstood.

9.
RITES OF PASSAGE
(2012) 70 min / Documentary USA Dir: Jeff Roy

The film documents the gender transformation of Maya Jafer, known to her blood relatives as Mohammad Jafer. As a devout Muslim, daughter of an abusive father, immigrant from India (Chennai) to the US, holistic medicine practitioner, and holder of TWO (not one) PhDs, Maya has had to meet a lot of challenges in her life. Her whole life, Maya has had to fight to be the person that she really is. Shot in vérité style, this film is an honest and truthful first-hand look at the real life struggles and joys Maya, and indeed other transgenders face when undergoing their own rites of passage towards fully realized self-hood.

10.
THE LOVE PATIENT
(2011) 95 min / Narrative USA Dir: Michael Simon

How far would you go to win back the love of your life? Perhaps send flowers, write poetry or even serenade that man of your dreams until he can take it no more? Paul, a hot but self-centered hunk and ad executive has other, more extreme ideas when sensitive hunk Brad drops him and begins dating another man. Not used to losing, and determined to regain his love, Paul decides to pretend to have a life-threatening illness in what he sees as a foolproof method in ensuring Brad’s return. But will the tangled web he weaves, get him in hot water rather than in to the arms of his hot man?

J came back on Thursday night after a week with his folks. It was lovely to see him at the airport – you see, we usually don’t go to pick each other up. London is an unforgiving city during rush hour traffic and generally we make our own ways back home. But this time I decided to go get J from the airport (being the die hard romantic that I am) and for those of you who know London, City airport is only 15 minutes from Canary Wharf where I work! Plus, I think I really missed him this time. Perhaps, I realized how much goes on in my life without my knowing only because J just makes it happen!

We have been together so long that I have forgotten what it was like to be apart. The other day I could not find any fresh socks in the sock drawer. It was only then that I figured that J is like my laundry fairy. Miraculously, twice a week the laundry is done, smelling fresh and crisply folded into our wardrobe. I was really cold last Sunday after I came back from my big road trip. I had no clue how to work the new complicated computer controlled heating device. So, I just put it on manual and have had the house heated to 21 degrees all week with no timer working (I shudder to think of the bill). If J was around, it would have been perfectly timed to heat the house up an hour before I got back so I could draw myself a long warm bath and not bother with domestic technology. On Sunday night, when I opened a bottle of wine sitting in front of the telly, it dawned upon me that I actually missed the old fella. Drinking a lovely merlot watching rubbish TV on your own on a Sunday evening is no fun.

I guess I take it all for granted when J is around. I pull my weight around the house with the cooking and the bills but I guess one only really appreciates something when you don’t have it (even if it is temporary). Right, so I’m going to show my love by whipping up a big meal for J this evening. I bought some beautiful artisan chorizo yesterday so I’m going to experiment with a chicken and chorizo dish that I tried a while ago. The best way to your partner’s heart is definitely through their stomach. And a bit of Spanish chorizo and a lovely glass of Rioja will definitely do the trick!

Roast chicken, chorizo and potatoes with thyme and butter beans

You will need (serves 2)

250 gms of chicken breast diced

250 gms chorizo. Don’t buy the supermarket sliced crap! For this to work you need a proper chorizo sausage!

4 cloves of garlic finely chopped

2 medium white onions finely chopped

1 tin of butter beans (or if you have no access to butter beans,

3 large potatoes

1 tablespoon fresh thymes leaves

1 teaspoon of dried oregano

2 red birds eye chillies

The zest of 1 lemon

1/2 tablespoon of paprika

1 tablespoon fresh parsley chopped

pepper to taste

1 vegetable stock cube

2 Tablespoons vegetable oil

Cherry tomatoes for decoration

To make

It looks like a lot of ingredients but this is actually a really easy main dish to make.

Peel the potatoes and cut them into quarters. Par boil them in a saucepan. Pre heat the oven up to 200 degrees centigrade

While the potatoes are boiling, dice the chicken, cut the chorizo into thick slices and keep aside.

In a frying pan heat one tablespoon of the vegetable oil. When the oil is hot, sauté the onions, chillies and garlic till golden brownish. Then add in the thyme and paprika and fry for about 5 mins on a low flame.

Use an ovenproof baking dish and spoon the sautéed spices into this. Then add the oregano, chicken, chorizo, par boiled potatoes, butter beans and pepper and then mix well. Sprinkle the stock cube over the mixture and oven bake for about 30 minutes. Do not add salt as the chorizo and the stock cube contains enough salt, you can always add more if it is not to your taste.

After 30 mins, take out of the over and then plat up with the cherry tomatoes as shown in the picture. Garnish with fresh parsley. Voila! Its a super tasty and lovely dish and especially yummy with some full bodied Rioja.

Now, the next session of the club is on for the 20th of May. But we’re not going back to Kari just yet. Why, you ask?

Because, as a special interlude, we have invited poet Arundhathi Subramaniam to hold a poetry session with the Queer Ink book club. She will read out some of her poems to us, and later, discuss what it takes to write poetry, and how sometimes, beautiful thoughts don’t need novels or stories, but stanzas and lines, to find expression. So all you poetry lovers and readers out there, do drop by for a lovely Sunday afternoon filled with poetry and chai.

I first met Arundhathi at an event organised by SPARROW, an organisation run by Tamil author Ambai,which had just come out with a book on translated folk stories written and told by women.
There, Arundhathi had read out a poem she had written, and I was enthralled.

Arundhathi has a gift to make every word count. In a form that only allows so many words, her choice of words and precision of feeling has awed readers around the country and globe.

Arundhathi has written three books of poetry – On Cleaning Bookshelves and Where I Live. Her third book is also titled Where I Live, but has a new selection.Her work has been translated into Hindi, Tamil, Italian and Spanish and used in several anthologies. In 2005, she co-edited an anthology of contemporary Indian love poetry in English, called Confronting Love. I’m really excited about having her at Queer Ink. Please spread the word and see you on the 20th!

Date : Sunday, 20th May 2012

Time : 12PM-2PM

Email ‘events@queer-ink.com’ to rsvp and for venue details.

Let’s get straight to it: why erotic stories?

Queer lives are becoming increasingly visible in writings and art, in demanding for rights, in challenging the law, in voicing protests, in starting organisations, in making an online presence; robust, vibrant and diverse voices are being heard in India and South Asia. This book is an attempt to add to those voices.

Moreover, erotica as a genre, has personally interested us. In terms of contemporary queer erotica, a lot of what is available is published in and about the West and we wanted to read more queer erotica from non-Western contexts. Within erotica, queerness has not been available in the public domain too readily though it has existed and has been shared quietly. So this anthology is an attempt to bring out those sexy, simmering writings and art. We also believe that queerness can take a fresh view on sex and sex lives and that queer erotica can challenge some of the normative structures of sexualities and genders.

How has your experience of putting this book together been?

We have thoroughly enjoyed putting the book together. It has been a thought provoking and exciting journey. Through this process we have also had the support of Shalini Krishan, the editor at Tranquebar. To start the process, we sent out an open call for submissions to queer lists, literary groups and blogs in India and the South Asian diaspora globally. Other than India, we were able to reach out to groups and individuals from Bangladesh, Nepal, Pakistan and Sri Lanka that engage with queer rights, writings and art. We also invited some published authors and artists to contribute to this anthology. Responses to this endeavour have been mainly positive and well received. The stories that were submitted have expanded our own ideas and notions about erotica. Erotica is pretty subjective, actually, like most art and literature – so your good could be my bad. Now we’re waiting for feedback and reviews about the book!

How did you go about the process of vetting (no pun) the stories?

Good writing was of course an important element but it was not the be all and end all. We wanted to prioritise stories that expanded traditional notions of sex. So we do have stories that complicate consent issues, that go out of the private space into the public, that involve more than just two persons. We have tried to be diverse and the stories reflect lesbian, bisexual, gay, trans and queer lives! We have tried to bring in regional representation as well. With this selection of stories, we were also hoping to highlight the multiple emotions that the sexual can elicit. So the stories here are sexy, cheeky, dark, intriguing and downright hot!

The collection looks explicitly “queer”. Do all authors feel the need to be associated as “gay writers”? Do you think there exists this pressure from the gay audience to ‘stick to the queer fiction’ alone?

Our call for submissions was an open one and there was no specification that only queer-identified authors could write. Also, we have used the term queer very broadly. Queer in this anthology represents non-normative genders, sexualities, lives and perspectives and is not restricted to LGBT identities.
We don’t think there’s a pressure to stick to queer fiction. But we believe that given the general dearth of writings and images on queer lives, the queer audience welcomes queer fiction and writings that reflect their lived realities, lives and experiences. Reading literature that is queer is likely to represent a reality that is closer to one’s own experiences.

What would you really like to see on the Asian queer literary scene?

A lot more queer writing! Literature that reflects a celebration of the plurality and non-conformity of sexualities, genders, sexual expressions and lived realities. Writings that join the dots between everyday lives and larger socio-political contexts of caste, class, ethnicity and economics. Writing that goes beyond LGBT identities and complicates and broadens existing notions of sex, desire, genders, relationships, power structures and silences. Themes of pride and survival. Themes of diversity. Also writings in different regional languages. While we cannot undermine the difficulties of living as a queer or gender variant in a heterosexually constructed world, many people make the tumultuous journey from shame to pride. We need to see more stories of such courage and the joy of being who we are!

Do any of the stories explore how larger social and political issues fracture and frame queer relationships?

Yes. Like we mentioned before, we have chosen stories like that. Also we started out by placing this anthology in a context of larger social and political issues. The call of submissions itself invited writers to challenge and broaden the normative.

Are the stories mainly sexually playful?

Our call of submissions invited authors to explore themes across ages, abilities, regions, genders, sexualities and sexual expressions. We were quite direct in asking for stories on BDSM. So we made an attempt but do not have a story exploring S/M directly, though many stories are definitely quite explicit in their sexual content. There are traces of bondage, of domination, of power play; consent lines are blurred, sexual games are played and sex is taken out into public spaces.

Some are of the opinion that sexuality is the only currency being exploited in the queer world. What is your take on it?

Since the struggle for queer acceptance is the recognition and rights of people with non-normative sexualities and genders, it seems that this is all queer lives are about. But our lives, like most lives, are about many things; about ordinary everyday things. It is not just about sex and sexuality but that is what tends to get most articulated or examined in the public domain.

When is the book out? And we can expect a Big-Bang launch?

The book hits bookstores in India in early June. It will also be available online. We also invite you to our book launch events in June in Bombay and Delhi. For details, follow us on Facebook. We promise you that Close, Too Close will leave you quite thrilled and craving for more!

Meenu and Shruti
You can reach them at queerotic.stories@gmail.com

“At a certain point, I’ve just concluded that for me personally it is important for me to go ahead and affirm that I think same-sex couples should be able to get married,” Mr. Obama said.

This is particularly important since Obama has always stated his opinions on same sex issues as evolving, and this was the step everyone was looking for. Obama made many promises to the gay community prior to taking office, and many have been critical of this work. However, Obama has always followed through on his support. With the up coming elections, and seeing as to how it is expected to be a close race, with Wednesday nights statement, Obama has sacrificed a reasonable number of voters.

Should Obama make it to a second term, I am certain that he will write down DOMA. All very exciting especially since it was Secretary of State Hilary Clinton’s husband who had enforced and signed DOMA, and it was Hilary Clinton who, not too long ago, lectured the world on gay rights!

Two thumbs up for the entire White House!

Deen – you inspire me to be true to myself.

Jan Villa, by Natasha Mendonca (20’)

After the monsoon flood of 2005 that submerged Bombay, the filmmaker returns to her city to examine the personal impact of the devastating event.