Gee, I love lava lamps

Home movies gone bad

2008-12-15T02:03:00.001-06:00

Long, long ago, before I could drive, I was just a bored teenager looking for something to do when school wasn't in session. Unfortunately, my parents let me play with their old camcorder. Even more unfortunately, some of my old home movies showed up on Google Video somehow. The crazy thing is, I have NO IDEA how they got there. It says the videos were uploaded in 2004, but did Google Video even exist back then? Be warned, these next few videos will suck.

A lot.

Adult Swim Commercials

One of the first things I tried to do was re-create the old "AdultSwim" commercials on Cartoon Network using my video editing software. I took three stabs at it, but my first attempt was the best.

This one actually made the most sense of the three. There's a short story, a plot, and a conclusion. At the time, this was almost identical to the actual AdultSwim commercials.

My second attempt was just stupid. This was directly imitating an AdultSwim commercial I'd seem a couple days before, and the original sucked just as much as my remake.

This last one was just because I had some strange video of a friend from school making a funny face and I didn't know what else to do with it. Looking back, this one is also a pile of crap.

Action: The Movie

"Action: The Movie" was made in spite. I was bored over Christmas break one year and wanted someone to make a movie with me, but my family wouldn't help. I responded by putting them in the movie anyway. The plot is pretty basic -- the movie was designed to juxtapose the peace and quiet of downstairs where my family was watching TV with the chaos of the imaginary battle happening upstairs in my room. At the end, I call everyone out for not helping me. They even ignored me when I put the camera right in their freakin' faces! Oh well... I think this one turned out the best of all my movies.

Blueberry Jam

This was actually made before Action: The Movie, but its a little longer and more complicated, so I've saved the best for last.

Before you watch this, it is important that you understand a little bit of the background behind the formation of this movie. This was filmed in the summer of 2003 or 2004 when me and my twin sister (Sadie) were bored with nothing to do. We came up with a quick plot and grabbed some old costumes from her closet and this is what happened. I did the video editing and we took turns shooting and directing. When we originally recorded it, we didn't have any way to convert the video to PC, so all the editing was done by carefully rewinding and recording over the extra stuff (like walking to the camera and stopping it).

"Blueberry Jam" is hard to follow, so let me explain. It starts off with two title screens. We really didn't need two. What was I thinking when I added the second one? Anywho, the plot takes place in the town of "Blueberria," where everything is fine until the town gets suddenly attacked by giant oranges. Why oranges? Because that's all we could find to attack a town with. In that first shot, my sister is playing a Blueberrian citizen when she gets attacked by oranges. Before the oranges get there, I come in as her stunt double to take the hits. You can see our dog screwing up the shot in the background.

In the next shot, I'm in a giant blueberry suit (yes, we had that laying around in my sister's closet) and I'm supposed to suddenly see the giant oranges coming. Why do some Blueberrians look like people and other Blueberrians look like giant blueberries? I don't know.

The next scene is one of the few parts where one of us narrates the story. The drawing is supposed to be of the city of Blueberria, and those small grape things are Blueberries (aka, Blueberrians). I say, "All over Blueberria, pedestrians were getting plummeted by huge falling oranges with a fresh, fruity scent. (oranges drop, sister screams, quick cut) All over the city of Blueberria, there were few that remained after this horrible accident, it was so devastating." Then my sister starts playing the voice of the blueberry in front of the grave saying, "Aw, my poor children! Why did it half to be me?" I narrate, saying, "Poor Mrs. Blueberry lost all she had! Her two children were left alone; in their graves..."

Now the plot thickens! The scene cuts to outside again, where our heroine in disguise thinks aloud. "How can I help the Blueberrians with their problems? I'm only an ordinary civilian. I know!" (scene cuts, hat appears on her head signifying that she has transformed into a super hero. I know, its so obvious!) "I know! As captain... SADIE! Da da da daaaaa!"

Now it's Sadie's turn to narrate. "In the evil lair of the evil twin villains, Twin Swan and Twin Two Anna Haef (Twin One and Twin Two and a half, get it?), they are chuckling over the success of their sinister plot." The scene cuts to inside the bathroom where we discuss how well the plan is working and chuckle as the bad guys.

The last part doesn't get much better. With the mask on, Sadie is suppose to be the villain Twin Two Anna Haef. She's apparently waiting on her co-villain who is apparently late for something. She calls me some made up word (there is no actual script, remember?), something like "fargle-snot." This is actually pretty similar to a work she would have called me in real life at the time. She finds me and I'm dressed as a villain in a crazy robe. My beard (and earlier my hair) is actually a plastic hula-skirt. When we enter, we do a crazy dance thing (like from "West Side Story," which we watched on TV the week before) and accidentally bump into each other. I ask if she's ready to commit more "evil deeds" when suddenly we are stopped by Captain Sadie. A brief battle with bad editing ensues, and the evil duo is defeated by Captain Sadie's "invisible laser beams." Sadie has this great zinger after she defeats me where she says, "Swan down, Two Anna Haef to go!"

After the battle, you see me saying "I claim victory!" and doing a crazy dance dressed as Captain Sadie. I swear we weren't high, just bored. Finally, its over.

Man, that kind of sucked. Strangely enough, watching all those old movies has inspired me to try and make a new, better movie... Maybe sometime over Christmas Break I'll make a new one for the first time in 5 years...

~jw

Neato Stumbleupon Trick!

2008-12-07T22:34:00.001-06:00

You might not realize this, but you can tell if a website has been reviewed on Stumbleupon by simply looking at the Stumbleupon toolbar! Here's how:

If the comment bubble has no lines in it, there have been no text reviews.

One line means there has been one review,

two lines means three reviews, and

three lines means three or more reviews.

Don't believe me? Try it!

~jw

You're doing it wrong...

2008-12-07T01:02:00.003-06:00

I was at Target looking for a Dirty Santa gift when I came across this...

Something is wrong here...

See, this is what a knight is supposed to look like:

...and THIS is what this kid looks like:

WTF, Target? Its not a hat. Its like they just grabbed some 12 year old kid that was waaaaay too big for the costume and shoved him in it anyway. FAIL.

~jw

Justin.TV times

2008-11-27T02:13:00.003-06:00

Watch live video from Gee I Love Lava Lamps on Justin.tv

Hey guys,

Recently, I started an impromptu show on Justin.TV, and it went fantastic! It went so well, in fact, that I plan to make it into a regular thing. From now on, you can come to this page to find out what times I will be broadcasting. When the time is right, head on over to http://www.justin.tv/zinggniz and join in the fun!

Looking forward to the next show, guys!

~Jw

Scheduled Broadcasts

Every Thursday from 10-11 p.m. (?)

Stupid cat attacks reflection

2008-11-16T01:44:00.003-06:00

This is my parent's cat. My Mom loves this cat, but my dad hates all cats. She asked him to take the cat to the vet to get it a tag, so my Dad legally named it "Stupid." Here's stupid attacking herself in the mirror:

Good times.

~jw

Gmail Capacity Experiment

2008-11-12T18:00:00.006-06:00

Gmail's storage capacity is growing at an exponential rate. You can even watch it grow live at gmail's login screen! As of this writing, a single Gmail account can hold 7262 MB of data. That's 7 gigabites of data, and growing fast. That leaves me with one question... is it actually possible to fill up a gmail account?

In order to test this theory, I've decided to start a little experiment. Simply email capacity.experiment@gmail.com as often as you want with as much as you want, and I'll update this page daily to let you know it's progress.

Here are some tips to keep in mind:
1. Text emails are small in size, so throw in an attachment or two if you've got the time!
2. Want to sign it up for spam? Go for it!
3. I will be checking the account daily and will post anything that's interesting here. Please don't send any personal data, so watch your default signatures!

Want to follow the experiment? Go to this discussion on the forum to see the "best of" emails that come in, or check back here every so often to see updates!

Any comments are welcome!

~jw

~~~~~~~~~~~

UPDATE: User Ziyonex suggests that people should subscribe the email address to Google Groups to receive more emails!

Also, jaffermaniar was worried that this was a big scam to collect email addresses. Well, its not. If you still are worried and don't want to risk it, send the message through one of these anonymous email websites:

Graph via ubergizmo.com

~~~~UPDATE (November 20th, 2008)~~~~~

"You are currently using 84 MB (1%) of your 7265 MB."

So it's been about one week and so far the response has been a little week. If we're gonna fill this puppy up, we need all the help we can get, so spread the word! Special thanks to all of you who have emailed already! Keep it up guys! 99% left to go...

~jw

Fix - How to install WAD files on a Wii with the newest firmware, v3.3

2008-11-11T06:31:00.002-06:00

Like many of you out, I carelessly updated my Wii to firmware version 3.3 before waiting to see how it affected homebrew, but don't worry! There IS a way to still install WAD files yet! To do this, you must have the Homebrew channel already installed, or a lot of patience with the Legend of Zelda glitch. This also works as a good way to get around the "re: -2011" error.

Here's how:

1. Go here and download this batch file to patch a legit copy of IOS15 to IOS16.
2. Click here to go to a page with what looks like a broken link to download IOS15. For now, the link there actually works (I am not hosting this file, so if it disappears you may have to do some googling).
3. Drag the IOS15 wad onto the batch file, and the new file (called IOS16.wad) will be created in the same directory.
4. Finally, use this copy of WadManager to install the new IOS16 wad. IOS16 should install fine because it registers in the Wii as a legitimate IOS update, unlike custom WADs. This specific copy of WadManger was tweaked to work with IOS16, so after you update you can install any WADs you want!
5. Install this WAD to retain all the updates of the newest firmware 3.3. Make sure you have no gamecube memory cards or any USB things plugged in. (via http://wiibrew.org/wiki/Wii_Shop_and_IOS51_installer)

And that does it! I'm still working on getting Backup Games to work, but you can go to this page for help on that. The only issue I've had so far with backup games is trying to get a WAD version of the dvdX installer. If you want even more compatability, you can try to downgrade your IOS with Waninkoko's downgrader.

Best of luck!

~jw

Things that suck: Technology upgrades for games

2008-10-15T10:06:00.001-05:00

Okay, this one is a bit of a double-edged sword. On the one hand, it sucks when you purchase an awesome, new iPhone, then five months later a new model comes out and makes your phone obsolete. On the other hand, its awesome being able to buy an old Pocket PC with wifi for only $20 on eBay.

Unfortunately, the problem goes from "understandable" to "freaking ridiculous" rather quickly when you look at the gaming market.

Case in point:

Today, the new PSP 3000 comes out. Not long before it, PSP Slim for $199. Stupid me bought the original $350 PSP "fat" way back in 2006, only two years ago. Two years, three upgrades.

The same thing happens to a much more noticeable scale with PC gaming. People have come to accept the fact that computers are getting faster and more powerful at an exponential rate, but do programmers have to program games that only run on top-of-the-line systems? Many of the games that are being programmed right now will never run on the computers of today. While it is much easier to upgrade PC gaming units than console units, wouldn't it make more since to program games with the average computer in mind? Instead, people have to download demos or pirate the games before hand just to check and see if the game can even run.

Ultimately, the real problem isn't that today's computers aren't powerful enough to make fun games, it's just that programmers have lost their focus. One of the reasons the Nintendo Wii outsold the competition so fast at the start of the console wars wasn't because of the graphics, but was because the whole concept was based around making games that are affordable and fun. When did the goal of computer programmers change from making good games to making good-looking games? More importantly, when will it go back to the way it was?

~jw

P.S. I do not not condone the pirating of PC games. Just throwing that out there...

StumbleUpon "Experiments" suck

2008-10-11T01:00:00.005-05:00

They always start off the same way...

"Hey guys, I wanna try an experiment! Everyone give this website a thumbs up on StumbleUpon and lets see what happens!"

Who do you think you're kidding, jerk? You know EXACTLY what will happen. 20 or 30 new StumbleUpon users will give you the thumbs up, and two hours later, BAM. You've got 30,000 hits.

BUT YOU SUCK. You know why? Because you've just ruined the point of StumbleUpon. You have to earn a thumbs up, you can't just ask for it. You are essentially just raping the system, and because of that, YOU SUCK.

...and people know it. Look at these reviews from this "experiment:" (click to see it bigger)

Even though you've just earned almost 10 dollars in one day from all the hits, you've essentially shot yourself in the foot. Your blog now has a crappy reputation, and its gonna take a lot more than a few thumbs up to over come that.

So in conclusion, I think I speak for all of us SU users when I say, YOU SUCK.

~jw

P.S. Stumble Cards also suck. Click here to see why.

Make a custom Wheel of Fortune puzzle

2008-10-09T22:37:00.004-05:00

Use this nifty tool from Atom Smasher to make your own custom image from Wheel of Fortune! Simply use an underscore to indicate empty boxes and hit "Make Image." If you make a good one, post it in the forum under this discussion!

Here's one that I made:

Now it's your turn!

IF IT'S GOOD, POST IT HERE!
~jw

10 creepy old-school video game drawings

2008-10-09T17:59:00.009-05:00

Try to guess which video game each picture is from! Click on the images to see them full-size. To see the answers, highlight the yellow bar of text.

Game 1

Give up? This one is Kirby!

Game 2

Give up? This one is Mario!

Game 3

Give up? This one is MegaMan!

Game 4

Give up? This one is actually a little harder than the others because it is based off of a flash animation called Platform Hero! You can see the original animation by clicking here.

Game 5

Give up? This one is Snow Bros!

Game 6

Give up? This one is Adventure Island!

Game 7

Give up? This one is Balloon Fight!

Game 8

Give up? This one is Bomberman!

Game 9

Give up? This one is Burger Time!

Game 10

Give up? This one is Dig-Dug!

~jw

P.S. I've been unable to find the original artist for these images, despite my hardest efforts. If anyone knows, please tell me in the comments so that I may give credit where credit is due! Thanks!

New Facebook layout installs Adware

2008-08-11T15:33:00.007-05:00

I believe the new Facebook installs adware on your computer every time you visit their website, and I can prove it.

Here's what happened. As many of you may know, I'm an active user of the social network StumbleUpon. Today, when browsing StumbleUpon's video site, I saw this:

Seems pretty normal so far... WAIT. ...What's that?

That share button looks really out of place. For one, the text has a white background, while all the other buttons have a nice dark background. Also, notice that this share button is next to the default share button.

This led me to a theory... I recently swapped over from the old Facebook to the new Facebook layout. Perhaps Facebook installed some kind of code into Firefox when I made the transition to add their "share" link to different sites.

To test this theory, I swapped over to Internet Explorer (a browser I never use to visit Facebook with) and reload the same page. This is what I saw:

See? No share link in IE. After I cleared out my cookies and cache in Firefox, the link disappears. Every time I visit the new Facebook and come back to Stumble Video, the link returns until I clear my cache again. Facebook puts what is essentially adware on my computer every time I visit their website.

Got something to say? Discuss in the comments.

~jw

Mozilla Firefox 3.0.1, Portable Edition for U3

2008-07-31T18:15:00.008-05:00

After searching unsuccessfully for a U3 version of Mozilla Firefox 3, I decided to create my own with the help of PackageFactory. The file is in *.u3p format and is about 11.2 MB download.

DOWNLOAD

Source 1:
MegaUpload

Source 2:
Rapidshare

Enjoy!

~jw

Dear GrandCentral...

2008-07-29T13:42:00.007-05:00

For those of you who don't know, GrandCentral is Google's new baby phone service that I was lucky enough to become a beta tester for. According to GrandCentral's FAQ,

"Based in Fremont, California, GrandCentral provides an innovative web-based voice communications platform that helps you manage all your phones and phone numbers through one simple interface. You get a single phone number that forwards to all of your phones, giving you one number for life."

It's thanks to GrandCentral that I can safely put the "Call Me" button on the right side of this page. One of the ways GrandCentral helps its users manage their phone numbers is through the use of online contact managing. When I get a call at my GrandCentral phone number, the first thing I hear is a recorded voice politely saying, "Call from... (name). Push one to accept, two to ignore, three to pick up and record..." If the person calling is one of your contacts online, then the computers does its best to say the name on its own. If it's a number that GrandCentral doesn't recognize, then it asks the caller to state their name when they first dial. This feature in particular has a tendency to confuse callers at first, but its great for screening calls from my end of the deal.

When I first started using GrandCentral at the beginning of 2008, there was an option on the "Address Book" tab to import contacts from Microsoft Outlook or other digital contact managing software. Unfortunately, that feature mysteriously went into "update mode" and stopped working for about seven months. After waiting anxiously for the feature to return, the feature decided to disappear this week all together. Heartbroken, I wrote this letter to the Grand Central team (picture added for dramatic effect):

From: John Wesley
Subject: Import/Export contacts
Date: Sun, 27 Jul 2008 15:27:47 -0700

For a while the Import contacts feature was having an "Upgrade," but recently it simply disappeared! What's going on? Will it ever come back? This is one feature that I'm not sure I can easily live without. :(

Please respond to let me know the GrandCentral workers are real and
that this service has not simply been abandoned. I love grandcentral, but you're letting me down... It's almost like being cheated on by a girl you've only dated for like six months but still felt really connected too. Yea, it probably wasn't going to work, but damn it was
nice while it was working. Maybe, just maybe, we could make this work. If we try. Together. GrandCentral, let's forget the past. All those things that happened? Let's leave those behind and move on with our lives... NO. Let's move on to a BETTER life. I believe in US. Don't let me down. <3

Immediately after sending this email, I received an email stating how it was unlikely for me to get a return email concerning my issue, "...due to the large number of emails received daily." Luckily, my love note was heart warming enough to generate a response:

Hello,

Thanks for your report.

The import and export functionality in the GrandCentral Address Book are currently unavailable. Our engineers are working diligently to find a solution.

We apologize for any inconvenience this issue may have caused and appreciate your patience and cooperation.

Sincerely,

The GrandCentral Team

Well, that's better than nothing, but not by much.

I still love you, GrandCentral, but you have to stop these games. STOP TOYING WITH MY HEART! :'(

~jw

P.S. All pictures found via Google Images. If you feel I have misused or stolen and of your work, please tell me in the comments and I will remove the picture. Thanks!

What's lower than "lol?"

2008-07-27T00:21:00.007-05:00

If you're reading this article, then you hopefully know what the internet is. If you know what the internet is, then you've probably heard this expression: "lol." Lol (pronounced "lowl") is an acronym for the phrase "laugh out loud," and is commonly overused to fill silences in online conversation. Don't have anything to say? Then just type "lol" and move on with your life.

Unfortunately, this blatant abuse of the term ultimately forced internet users to come up with a more powerful version of the expression when something comical made them actually laugh. This led to the birth of "LMAO," or "laughing my ass off." Sadly, even "LMAO" is loosing its meaning as people begin to misuse it more and more as well.

Well today, no more. If you do audibly laugh at something, I propose using the old acronym, "lol." For simply humorous moments, I propose the use of a new acronym: "jag," which stands for "just a grin." While it might sound a little strange at first, it will catch on through proper use. To help explain, I've created a brief chart. Observe:
Get it? Stop the abuse. Spread the word.

~jw

P.S. Thanks to the comment from "Hmm," I've fixed a typo I made. Thanks! You're right. :)

5 more reasons the RIAA is retarded

2008-06-28T00:04:00.005-05:00

As of June 26, 2008, the RIAA has sued the following people:

Homeless people

"In Warner v. Berry, where the RIAA was suing a man who lives in a homeless shelter, the Magistrate Judge -- Hon. Kevin Nathaniel Fox -- recommended that the plaintiffs' application for a default judgment be denied, and that the plaintiffs be ordered to show cause why they should not be sanctioned under Rule 11. The Judge agreed that the default judgment should be denied, but chose not to sanction plaintiffs' attorneys."

Dead people

"Lawyers representing several record companies have filed suit against an 83 year-old woman who died in December, claiming that she made more than 700 songs available on the Internet."

People without computers *or* internet

“Plaintiffs are informed and believe that Defendant, without the permission or consent of Plaintiffs, has used, and continues to use, an online media distribution system to download the copyrighted recordings, to distribute the copyrighted recordings to the public, and/or to make the copyrighted recordings available for distribution to others’.”

Interesting: “has used, and continues to use”. However, the Walls don’t even own a computer.

People in a stroke

"The defendant John Paladuk was living in Florida at the time of the alleged copyright infringement, and had notified the RIAA that he had not engaged in any copyright infringement. Despite the fact that Mr. Paladuk suffered a stroke last year (pdf), rendering him disabled, the RIAA commenced suit against him on February 27, 2007. Suing the disabled is not new to the RIAA."

The wrong person knowingly for two years

"On Monday, the RIAA conceded that, after nearly two years of litigation, it was targeting the wrong person."

~jw

How to use your gmail account as a disposable email account!

2008-06-22T18:54:00.000-05:00

Starting about two years ago, web users started using temporary email accounts to sign up for web services and to avoid spam. Well, instead of using one of the many fake-email-address-generating websites, you can use your very own Gmail accounts with no worries! Here's how!

1. Once you're logged into your Gmail account, click "settings" in the upper right section of the page.

2. Now change to the "Filters" tab.
3. Now click "Create a new filter" on the bottom of the page.
4. In the "To:" form, enter your regular Gmail account address, but add two periods between the last two letters of your email account. Because Gmail ignores the periods, emails sent to that address would normally end up in your inbox.
5. On the next page, select "Skip the Inbox" and "Delete it," and then select "Update Filter." Optionally, you can also select the check box next to the "Update" button to remove all previous emails sent to this version of your email address.

Congratulations! Next time you want to sign up for something online but don't want to receive spam, give them your email account with the two additional periods. All emails sent to this address will automatically be put into the trash and marked as read, never to bother you again! If you need to receive an email to activate your account, just look in the trash. Also, this means that your "spam" folder doesn't fill up with unread mail. Awesome!

~jw

Sad Pokemon

2008-06-17T18:03:00.018-05:00

WARNING! Some of these are NSFW.
I stumbled upon these pictures HERE a while back and couldn't find any other sources, so I thought I would post them here to make them easier to view! Click on the pictures to see them at their original size. Enjoy!

Getting the f*ck out of the way

2008-06-12T14:05:00.002-05:00

Its the newest trend! Give it a shot!

10 Things that make me mad, in no particular order

2008-06-12T13:36:00.006-05:00

That guy at the gym who runs really fast while you're jogging and laps you three times, then leaves. You've ran 10 laps and he's only run 3, but it still makes you feel like crap.
People who answer their cell phones at the movies.
Automated phone things when you call customer service. Google perfected it with 1-800-Goog411, but no one else seems to be catching on yet...
Learning that humidity can ruin Motorola phones and void the warranty on a muggy day.
Coming up with a great idea in the car, but then forgetting it when you get home.
Remembering that idea, and realizing that it wasn't that great after all.
Grocery shopping.
When old people can't figure out how to use a touch-screen checkout pad.
Having one item at Wal*mart but getting stuck behind long lines of people shopping for families of 12.
Politics.

Sorry that was so random. Had to get that one out....

~jw

Know yourself better -- Internet Hobby of the week

2008-06-11T14:08:00.009-05:00

What happens when you take Wikipedia and mix it with Dictionary.com? You end up with the Urban Dictionary. At Urban Dictionary's website, definitions are submitted by users and then voted upon by visitors. Words that normally don't make it (link nsfw) past Webster's strict standards easily top the charts on the Urban Dictionary.

So think about it... Doesn't it suck that you can't add yourself to Wikipedia's website? Fortunately, at Urban Dictionary your more than welcome to define yourself. In fact, you may find that your name has already been defined!

Here's the definition of the first half of my name:

john

1564 up, 385 down

a person who uses the services of a prostitute

"Police ran a sting on the newcomer johns at the whorehouse"

john

681 up, 332 down

A toilet, outhouse, etc. Referred to in the movie Robin Hood Men in Tights, in which they were named after the awful king, Prince John.

"Here is the new Bill that has been sent to you, Mr. President."

Not too flattering, huh?

Here's the definition of my girlfriend's name:

Maria

383 up, 90 down

The most sexy girl you will ever meet, known to blow the minds of many men. Extremely talented and beautiful, eyes cut from stars.

The song. "Maria.. I just met a girl named Maria."

name person girl hot awesome

And every word of it is true!

So what are you waiting for? Look yourself up from here:

~jw

Firefox has sold out

2008-05-29T21:19:00.004-05:00

First off, I would like to remind the world that I love Firefox. Really, I do. Its a great web browser, its fast, and I love the extensions.

Unfortunately, I feel that Firefox has finally sold out. A couple of days ago, The Mozilla Company (makers of Firefox) posted on its blog that it plans on setting a new Guinness World Record for "the most software downloaded in 24 hours." While Firefox has always had huge community support in the past, this time feels different...

For one thing, this wasn't "spontaneously" started by the community -- this was purposefully devised by the Mozilla Co. to promote Firefox. This quickly changes the scenario from "cool community support" to "huge marketing scheme." This news has shown up everywhere on the internet, on television, and has even gotten people to make a pledge to download. The Mozilla Co. has always had interest in spreading the usage of its browser, as shown by its teaming up with Google to promote blogger support through the use of Adsense. This leads me to the real question... Has Firefox sold out and gone corporate?

The answer is yes. Fortunately, like with Google, few people care.

~jw

The Pet Spa

2008-05-28T00:28:00.008-05:00

If you love a cat you just met on the street more than your grandmother, don't watch this clip.

After doing some basic research, I found some more info on this insidious device. Aparently, CBS News did a report on this device some time back. Check it out...

The best part is when the dude actually gets in it himself! I almost lost it!
Click HERE To see their official website.

~jw

American democracy is greedy, and that's a good thing

2008-05-24T21:54:00.004-05:00

I've just had a moment of profound clarity that need to be shared with the world. Democracy is inherently greedy.

American Democracy is Democracy as viewed by the American people., which focuses on the power of the individual. The phrase laissez fair (literally meaning "let do" in French) was attributed to describing American economics in the 18th century, which essentially meant that businesses should act in their own self interest and allow the "invisible hand" of the market to work itself out. This view of economics rose from the political jargon of the American Revolution.

How is American Democracy greedy?

American Democracy is greedy because it promotes the welfare of the individual instead of promoting the welfare of the masses. The American people are all crying out, "I want what is best for ME."

How is this good?

In economics, this principal generally works itself out. As every business fights to become the best it can be individually, many companies inherently must fail. When businesses close in America, it is a kind of modern Darwinism, in which only the strongest survive. This leads to the United States becoming one of the most powerful countries in the world.

On a societal level, this causes what many people hate about the American attitude -- pride. Everyone in America is told by his or her surrounding society to become the best. Theoretically, this creates competitive job markets, challenging educational systems, and higher quality of life overall for the society. Like Darwinism, the weak die off leaving only the strong. Theoretically, that is.

Why is America no longer an American Democracy?

In the past 100 years, America has started down a new path. The Civil Rights movement, the fight for Women's rights, and the newly emerging fights for immigration rights and sexual rights are changing the focus of American politics. While these movements were and are unarguably important in the fight for justice and equality, they have also changed what Americans view as acceptable.

Instead of protecting the welfare of the individual, the American people are attempting to protect the welfare of the group. People have become overly sympathetic toward the weak in our society who have traditionally faded away. Because of this new struggle to save the weak, the American way of social Darwinism begins to fail.

Why is that a problem?

If the weak cannot die off, American Democracy fails. Therefor, America fails.

For example, lets look at the average American's quality of life. To find the average of this data, we must consider and weigh the best against the worst quality of life that people are living with. If we allow the worst to disappear, the nation has a higher overall average. If we preserve the worst, the average quality of life dips.

This can be seen in a very real life situation -- the "No Child Left Behind" act. Because parents hate to see their students fail, schools are now being forced to lower their standards to allow almost every student to eventually pass. Contrary to how beneficial it may initially seem, this has the overall effect of lowering test scores on a national level, and slowing down the talented students.

It is the struggle to succeed that makes America America. If we take away that struggle, we take away what made America great.

What is the solution?

Unfortunately, there is no easy answer. Simply put, there needs to be a balance between the fight for social welfare and individual welfare.

If our nation went all the way toward social welfare, we would be living under socialism. Unfortunately, people are instinctively greedy, and history has shown that socialism in most cases leads to corruption and fails. If somehow we managed to achieve socialism without corruption, our country would loose its global power and become average in terms of overall prosperity. The preservation of the weak means a decrease in overall power.

Alternatively, if America focused only on the promotion of individual welfare, our country would prosper as a whole, but certain individuals would suffer horribly. Children in school that could not live up to the challenge of our highly demanding public education systems would have to take lower level jobs with bare minimum wages, far below current minimum wage. There would no social security, only private businesses that offered competitively priced insurance plans. The US government would only serve to deal with what the market could not.

The ultimate solution would have to balance between these two concepts, leaning more toward individual welfare to preserve what is America. In this ideal country, the government would exist to function as a preserver of justice and manager of foreign affairs. Churches, charities, and non-profit organizations would exist to distribute social welfare, while the government would manage the greedy, self-serving world that businesses and individuals competed in.

WAIT A MINUTE... That sounds like... Separation of church and state?

Think about it.

~Jw

P.S. Comments on this are more than welcome. What is your opinion?

Four Misnomers about Windows Vista

2008-05-21T22:11:00.006-05:00

There's no denying that Windows Vista has a bad rap. When my old laptop died, I was kind of worried when I found that every new computer came pre-packaged with Vista. I ended up replacing it with a very suave HP Pavilion dv6815 Entertainment Notebook featuring Windows Vista, and I have to admit -- it's not bad.

The Expectations

Like most users of the Internet, I have heard the horrible things said about Windows Vista, and that is what I expected when I first booted up my new laptop. Throughout high school, I experimented with various Linux distributions and shell edits to the Windows platform -- I know my way around a good operating system. These are the things I've heard said about Vista:

1. It's slow
2. It isn't backwards-compatible
3. It's asks too many questions
4. It converts people to Mac computers

Strangely, I happen to disagree with all four of these concepts. Lets start at the top of the list...

1. It's slow

There's no denying that Vista tries really hard at being pretty, and unfortunately, this can take away from performance. What many people don't seem to realize is that these settings can all be turned off from the control panel.

Still, I will confess that Vista does use considerably more system resources than XP, but that is to be expected as we move toward newer technologies. Now-a-days you can't even buy the newest PC video games unless you also poses a brand-name , top-of-the-line, I-really-like-hyphens computer. Even then, the darn thing will be too slow for Crisis 2. While XP should definitely stick around, it won't be necessary for long as computers get more and more powerful. Computers from 1995 are now laughable by today's standards, so the resource issue is no issue at all -- Microsoft is just trying to step ahead of the market.

2. It isn't backwards-compatible

That's the silliest rubbish I've ever heard. When you launch a program, you can right click on the icon to launch it in "XP mode" or any other previous Windows operating system. In the months that I've owned Vista, the only program I couldn't get to work was Peer Guardian 2, and that's probably because I didn't try hard enough.

3. It asks too many questions

Sometimes it does seem a little excessive on security to ask before launching a program from my desktop that I clicked on, but honestly its not any different than the "sudo" admin method used in Ubuntu. The only difference is that in Vista you don't have to retype your password each time. Security is nice. Stop complaining.

4. It converts people to Mac computers

Don't you hate those commercials with the lame Windows guy in a suit and the "cool" Mac college kid making fun of the suit guy? Me too. Mac marketing people are smart. They know their audience, and they know what people have been saying about Windows. Their advertisements only perpetuate the misnomers about Windows.

Macintosh computers are built with one concept in mind -- ease of use. Everything about a Mac is designed to just work, and it does just that. Windows, on the other hand, has traditionally been designed to be flexible. The new Windows Vista seems to be Microsoft's attempt at a compromise between the two. I love some of the new features in Windows, even if they seem overly simplified, but it's no Mac.

Macintosh marketing is working to convert people to their brand by leaching on to Microsoft's scarred reputation and sucking on it like the media sucks on Obama's preacher.

In conclusion...

Vista isn't bad. While it's still stupid to upgrade from XP to Vista, it still doesn't deserve the bad rap that its been given. So come on, guys... Lets try to love, OK?

~Jw