It’s Anthony here – the creator and writer of the breakup guide. The ‘no bullshit guide to getting over your ex girlfriend’ contained over 17, 000 words, all from my heart and experience (not to mention the videos) and as confident as I was about the content – I was well and truly knocked off my feet by the feedback I received and the lives that it changed for the better.

I have received “thank you” emails from the UK, The US, India, Canada, Italy, Argentina, South Africa, Australia, Morocco….you get the picture – a lot of fucking people from many, many countries around the world! My latest count was 359 emails!

It hammered home my belief that getting over an ex girlfriend can be one of the toughest experiences a man can go through in life, and that there is a huge need for the right kind of advice.

So, What’s Next?

I’m currently on a sabbatical/time off from work, for one reason only: To create the worlds greatest breakup guide in Ebook form, which will also contain audio. I plan to make this THE go-to guide for the broken man, the first name on everybody’s list when they are struggling to get over whats-her-name. I’m talking some really revolutionary shit, here!

The product will be on sale – I know a lot of people won’t like that, but I am putting a crazy amount (and have already) of time into this and I make no apologies whatsoever, for trying to make money doing something that I love and hopefully providing a service. I only have good intentions.

What I Need From You

If you have benefited, or ARE benefiting from this guide – I would like to hear as much feedback below this article as possible. Tell me what has helped you. What the guide lacks. What I didn’t elaborate on and need to write more about. Any special circumstances I have missed out? Is the forum actually helpful, or does it just keep you focusing on the negative? Does the accountability on there actually help, or hinder your whats-her-name shaped hole in your heart?

No holds barred – help me, to help you out. Anyone who comments will receive the new and improved Breakup Guide for absolutely free.

I will probably edit this article as the feedback grows. Cheers for your time chaps, and keep that chin up!

Time until the new, improved breakup guide is released…

I have a couple of proven services to help you.

Take a look at the coaching services available – all guaranteed to help you get over your ex girlfriend and to focus on you and your kick-ass life:

Skype Coaching 1-1

You get:

. You and me, one-on-one

. One hour coaching talk on Skype

. A guidance email, in your inbox within 24 hours of the session – on everything we spoke about in the coaching session and what you need to do next

Investment:

$40 per hour (with free guidance email)

MSN Coaching 1-1

You get:

. You and me, one-on-one

. One hour coaching chat on MSN

. A guidance email, in your inbox within 24 hours of the session – on everything we spoke about in the coaching session and what you need to do next

Investment:

$20 per hour (with free guidance email)

…Or book in slots of 5 for an awesome discount:

Five-Slot Coaching Package

You get:

. You and me, one-on-one

. Five one hour coaching sessions on MSN or Skype (whatever tickles ya pickle)

. A guidance email, in your inbox within 24 hours of the session – on everything we spoke about in the coaching session and what you need to do next (because that shit is important)

Investment:

X5 Skype 1-1 Coaching Sessions (with free guidance email after each session): Usual price – $200…. discounted price: $160!!

X5 MSN 1-1 Coaching Sessions (with free guidance email after each session) : Usual price – $100…. discounted price: $80!!

One Week Crash-Course Package

You get:

. You and me, one-on-one

. 3 Skype and 3 MSN Coaching sessions (one hour each) in one week

. A free guidance email, in your inbox within 24 hours of the session – on everything we spoke about in the coaching session and what you need to do next

. A 45 minute MSN catch-up session one week later, to see how you’re getting on

. A  audio mail from me after the MSN session via email, designed to keep you on the right track

. A copy of ‘Double Your Dating’

Investment:

X3 Skype 1-1 Coaching Sessions (with free guidance email after each session): Usual price – $120

X3 MSN 1-1 Coaching Sessions (with free guidance email after each session): Usual price – $60

X1 Copy of ‘Double Your Dating:’ Usual Price – $19.97

Total value of package = $199.97 …discounted price: $100!!

**You must purchase ‘Double your Dating’, from this link to qualify. The $19.97 will already be deducted from the package**

Breakup 101 Coaching Package

You get:

. You and me, one-on-one

. 6 Skype Coaching sessions every week for 4 weeks

. A free guidance email, in your inbox within 24 hours of each session – on everything we spoke about in the coaching session and what you need to do next

. A 45 minute MSN refocus session at the end of every week, to define your goals and keep you focused

. An audio mail from me after the MSN session via email, designed to keep you on the right track

. A fully comprehensive report on your personal profile. This will show how far you have come, what steps you have taken and what you need to keep doing. (Oh yes!)

. A copy of ‘Double Your Dating.’

Investment:

X6 Skype Coaching Sessions per week, for four weeks (with free guidance email after each session): Usual price – $40 X 24 = $960

. X1 45 minutes MSN refocus session: Usual Price: $15

X1 Copy of ‘Double Your Dating:’ Usual Price – $19.97

Total value of package = $994.97 …discounted price: $420!!

**You must purchase ‘Double your Dating’, from this link to qualify. The $19.97 will already be deducted from the package**

If you have any questions about the coaching sessions, or still are  unsure – feel free to contact me (with no obligations) with the subject being “Coaching Enquiry.”

Now you’re back on the scene as a single guy, wondering how to get a girl to like you may be occupying your thoughts right now. Before you even consider dipping your toes back into the world of dating, I can’t stress enough that you accomplish your primary goal here in getting over your ex girlfriend. Girls can smell lack of confidence and insecurity in a man and they are much more than likely to like you, when you’re not sobbing on their shoulders about “that bitch that tore your heart out.”

Nevertheless, assuming you are ready to get back in the dating game, but need that extra confidence boost and a bit of a helping hand – I’d like to suggest the perfect book for this situation. It is no fluke that ‘Double Your Dating’ has been bought and downloaded as an ebook over 10 million times. The advice is revolutionary to a low in confidence and clueless guy, who would like to get more girls to like them and in turn, get more options in the dating pool.

I’m not going to lie, when I was first told about this book – I was highly skeptical and apprehensive. I’ve come across many so called ‘dating/ pickup guru’s’ on the internet before and their attitude seemed somewhat shady and crude. I was wrong. David De Angelo’s book is the best place to start, for a guy like you who is interested in a practical and decisive dating advice, while successfully getting more girls to like you. If you have missed the boat on countless opportunities with women, spent nights wondering “what went wrong” or why she blew hot and cold – DYD could be a welcome breath of fresh air to you.

Have you ever seen an average-looking, non-rich guy with an insanely hot girlfriend and thought “what the hell!?” Your first thought may be something like “lucky bastard, some guys have all the luck!” Well firstly, that kind of attitude is not going to be productive in getting a girl to like you. Secondly, this book explains exactly why you don’t need to have Hollywood looks, a heavy wallet or constantly be showering women with compliments and gifts in order to get them to like you.

This book is about how understanding how attraction works. Girls get hit on everywhere they turn and they hear the same old stuff every day, but this book blows all that out of the water and helps you to stand out. The author of this book’s inspiration is exactly the same as mine in writing my breakup guide. He was sick and tired of getting crappy advice, which continued to not work and knock back his progress – so he did his own research from personal experience and is now sharing it to guys in need of help. The only difference is I am an expert in how to to get over an ex girlfriend and he is an expert on how to get a girl to like you. Or more girls, for that matter!

This isn’t about being a male whore – it’s about ignoring all the unconventional advice which has left you disillusioned, when it comes to success with women. Whether you want to be a ‘Casanova’ kind of guy, who meets new women all of the time. Or you want to meet that special women, or get a particular girl to like you, who you have had your eye on for a long time – this book will really help you in this area of your life.

Purchase ‘Double Your Dating:

High Fidelity

Rob, (played by John Cushack) a record store owner and compulsive list maker, recounts his top five breakups, including the one in progress. Although this movie is conclusively centered around a breakup; it’s often hilarious and gives a very realistic look into what goes through a guys mind post-breakup.

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Swingers

This is a story about Mike, (played by Jon Favreau) a guy who left his girl in New York when he came to LA with hopes of becoming an actor. It’s been six months since his girlfriend left him and he’s not doing so good. So, his pal and some other friends try and get him back in the social scene and forget about his 6 year relationship. Swingers is the quintessential guy movie and truly one of the sharpest male-oriented comedies of the 1990s.

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Forgetting Sarah Marshall

Peter (played by Jason Segel) is a composer and a likable sad-sack who’s devastated when his girlfriend of five years, Sarah Marshall, the star of a cheesy CSI-style crime show, dumps him. He weeps, he mopes, he does all the embarrassing shit we wish we never do in a breakup – then he books a holiday in Hawaii, where his ex and the new guy are staying. I’m not a huge Russel Brand fan but was surprisingly amused by him and this film is an easy watch. P.S. The brunette girl in Hawaii is smoking!

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500 Days of Summer

The film starts with the guys voice saying something like; “if you’re looking for a happy ending – this is not one of them.” An offbeat romantic comedy about a cynical woman who doesn’t believe true love exists, and the young man who falls for her and fails to cope with her mixed signals. The main character reflects on the years spent with his hypothetical ex girlfriend and the trials and tribulations that came with it. VERY funny in parts!

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Kramer Vs Kramer

A timeless classic of fucked up relationships and the emotions that come with them. A just-divorced man must learn to care for his son on his own, and then must fight in court to keep custody of him. Dustin Hoffman and Meryl Streep are simply fantastic with this portrayal! Food for thought guys; Everything is handled with grace and compassion.

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Eternal Sunshine of a Spotless Mind

A couple undergo a procedure to erase each other from their memories when their relationship turns sour. If you can relate to the underlying theme of wanting to rid your ex girlfriend from your mind, this is a great film. If you have come to understand that acceptance can sometimes be a great thing and not a compromise or a ‘settle for’ – this is a moving film.

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About Last Night

This film gets ripped by most, but I like it. Rob Lowe & Demi Moore find each other and enter an on-again, off-again relationship. Demi looks hot in a 80′s-sweater-8-sizes-to-big kind of way, and Jim Belushi is outstanding as Lowe’s well-meaning but crude best friend. More realistic about relationships than most Hollywood productions and highlights the tribulations after the ‘honeymoon period’ is over.

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Closer

Fucked up doesn’t even begin to cover it! Some say it’s depressing – I personally think it’s a VERY accurate portrayal of feelings after a web of deceit and the affects of the tender male ego after a breakup, especially the scene with Julia Roberts and Clive Owen. He responds “BECAUSE I’M A FUCKING CAVEMAN”, when she asks about his jealousy of the man she’s now with. This searing story of betrayal isn’t for kids.

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Sliding Doors

Gwyneth Paltrow and her disturbingly accurate English accent, misses the tube train as the doors shut before she gets the chance to get on. The film is cleverly wrote and shows how different that split-second in her life would have been if she did, or did not get on the train. Throughout the film you get to see how her life goes in both ways – if she got the train, it would’ve ended in a breakup and vice versa. Sometime breakups truly are a blessing in disguise and this film focuses on this.

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The Break-Up

I know, I know!! You’re a guy and whenever you hear the words “Jennifer Aniston,” your chick-flick radar sets off it’s panic alarm! This film makes the list because it represents how damaging it can be when you listen to the wrong breakup advice while showing you some couples are just not meant to be. Also, this ‘battle’ of the sexes that you can become embroiled in, shows that there truly is no winner.

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Annie Hall

Woody Allen’s writing, directing and acting of a neurotic stand up comic, with a history of failed relationships is simply genius. Woody is firing from all cylinders, nailing one joke after another in this modern American classic tale of a man who loses his mind because of his love of a woman.

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If you’ve found yourself here, the chances are you are really struggling with the effects of your break up. Well fret not; you’ve come to the right place. Before you go any further I’ll quickly tell you my story and how I came to write this guide and more importantly – why you should take time to read it.

My Story

My hands were sweating, staring down at the floor to avoid the awkward silence. To outsiders, my three year relationship with my ex girlfriend was perfect and we were the golden couple. I myself knew the real truth and that our relationship had a time limit – and here it was.

Although it was mainly a mutual decision to end it, I was the one who seemed to struggle the most coming to terms with the situation. She moved on very quickly into another relationship, while my life proceeded to fall apart at an equally alarming rate. Death of a loved one, followed by a crippling debt and losing my job all got on top of me and I just could not cope.

I made all the mistakes that men make when going through a breakup. You name it I did it. My health, looks, dignity, self-esteem, confidence all took a knock in devastating fashion and I was by far the lowest I had ever been in my life. As I scoured the internet for some sort of help all I got was further disappointment. The advice was either misleading, weak or aimed mainly at women and I never felt more alone. As I began to heal at my agonizingly slow pace I decided to chronicle my thoughts, actions, and feelings – putting them in to words for a future reminder to myself, should I ever find myself in this position again. I became very intrigued by how many men shared my story and how they also allowed it to ruin their life.

Finally, the day came when I was free from the burden of heartache, I no longer thought about her. I’d picked my life up from the pits and I could see a better future for myself. Alas, I met another girl! She was gorgeous, intelligent, sexy, funny, she understood me – I’d really hit the jackpot with this one and was willing to change my life dramatically and move hundreds of miles away from home for her….

… Until the day she decided to suddenly dump me. Now to say this one was out of the blue would be the understatement of the century! I was completely crushed and I fell in to my old destructive habits from my previous breakup and history was starting to repeat itself. I was truly devastated and I could feel myself falling in to the person I was years before and it was a scary thought. Determined to not slip back – I read my previous notes/journal.

Although I dated this girl for a shorter length of time to girl number one, my feelings were much stronger for her. I thought we were going to last and I was not expecting for her to break up with me. I was more than aware of how badly my life could turn if I let it, so I had to fully commit to carrying out my own advice. It wasn’t easy – it was still fucking HARD, but after immersing myself in my notes I stayed true to myself and I was astounded with the results. I found that with the help of the guidelines, studies and affirmations I had made, I carried on with my life and the pain was much shorter lived than expected.

You see, when it comes to a breakup there is no short-cut when it comes to what you feel. But there IS a short-cut with regards to how long you feel it for. We really do make life harder than it needs to be.

Happy in my success, I decided to use my notes and transform them in to a guide for guys in the same situation. As stated on the FAQ’s girls are certainly welcome on this site, the guide is wrote in the voice of a guy to a guy because – I’m a guy! All people hurt after a relationship ends but I do believe that generally, men are pretty lousy at it and need a bit of direction…

**CLICK HERE FOR THE NEXT CHAPTER**

Get over your ex girlfriend is the name of this website and that is exactly what it focuses on doing. Now, if you have a quick Google search of “how to get over your ex girlfriend,” it’ll only be a matter of time before you come to a “how to get your ex back” article or often a whole website devoted to it!  My personal opinion on this is – this makes me want to vomit. These people give you false hope and encourage you to cling on to something that is usually not possible. I think it’s really sad that people will play on your emotional vulnerability like this while also asking you to part with your money!

I don’t care if you broke up with her, she broke up with you, mutual ending or whatever. How you broke up does not matter, everyone has a right to be sad when it comes to the end of a relationship with somebody we love. What does matter is; you understand your goal here. Sure, some couples do get back together after a breakup and live happily ever after. Actually, my close friend is an exception to this rule and is now happily married. However this site has purely one goal: To fully support and show you how to get over your ex girlfriend. If you want the ‘cling on to hope and feel worse’ people, then this is not the place for you and I suggest you click that little cross on the top right of your screen, good luck to you.

This site is for people who have simply had enough. You’ve had enough of the sleepless nights, the comfort eating or even complete lack of appetite. You’ve had enough of having no confidence, fearing over the uncertainty of your future and mostly – you’ve had enough of thinking about her every single moment of your day. You need to commit to this guide and also to getting over your ex girlfriend and putting your life back on track.

Along with the supported audio, this guide is pretty detailed (over 17, 000 words) and you can either read it in one sitting, sporadically – or both. I advise you to bookmark or subscribe the site and read it in your own time and to really take in what is being said, please don’t race through. Please note that this guide will test you. It will test your willpower and will ask of you to do things that make you uncomfortable. Even if you slip up now and then; stay relentless and remain focused on your goal. If you’re serious about wanting to get over your ex girlfriend, the time is now. I have put a lot of energy in to this guide and I sincerely hope that this brings you what you need. Now let’s get started on getting over your ex girlfriend and taking control of your life.

**CLICK HERE FOR THE NEXT CHAPTER**

Breaking news: Men feel sad sometimes and breakups hurt everyone. Contrary to popular belief, it seems men have feelings too! But of course you know this, however it doesn’t mean that everybody else does – and that’s why you’re here. Society likes to tell you that it’s moved forward and is accepting to men who express their feelings, but it’s just not completely true.

Women generally have more permission to talk about their feelings, and can expect an abundance of sympathy from their family and peers during such stressful times. Since the dawn of time men have been taught to internalize their emotions and any sign of showing of sadness is seen as weak. Men wear masks; we don our poker face, shrug our shoulders and lie to others and even ourselves when asked about our well-being…because that’s just what guys are “supposed to do.” But don’t feel to sorry for us because the hard truth is; we don’t really help ourselves!

If you went out in the streets right now and conducted a survey about men’s behaviour after a break up, it wouldn’t take long for you to hear a woman say something like:

“Men are cold during a breakup and they handle it better”

Or

“Men don’t feel as sad as women after a breakup”

And of course we know this isn’t true. How come women seem to have it all worked out with this emotional balance business. while we seem to have been left behind? Well there are a few reasons, but I staunchly believe in one number one factor behind our broken-hearted poker-faces…

Why men don’t show emotions like women do

It all started in the playground. Have you ever hurt yourself as a child and been fobbed off with “big boys don’t cry?” No malice is intended of course and there is nothing wrong with that as the intentions are to condition the kid to toughen up. That’s ok. That’s fine, but it does put a mental note in the boys brain that although he feels the pain, he is not allowed to show it. Next time the boy feels pain – he stifles his inner torment with a stiff upper lip (sound familiar?)

When a young girl falls over and expresses her pain, she is told “poor you” and is comforted until she feels better. Thus, the girl grows into a woman who shares her pain with others in order to heal – because that’s acceptable. Now, I know what you’re thinking. That all the above doesn’t matter, and a young boy should toughen up because the world is sometimes a cruel and tough place. Although I wholeheartedly agree with the latter, let me tell you this. It DOES matter. I said at the beginning of this guide that if you want to heal and get rid of this hideous fucking feeling – you must open up your mind and you must understand that we men have been conditioned by not only society norms, but a number of other factors. Forget everything you think you know already!

You’re Not Bruce Willis and that’s ok

After reviewing the taboo subject of men dealing with feelings and why it is so, we have identified the problem – so now it’s time to move on with a solution.

With media depictions showing tough guys such as Bruce Willis and Clint Eastwood putting their feelings to one side and saving the world post-breakup, it amplifies the ‘big boys don’t cry’ ethos, adding pressure to our need for a macho image and leaving us in envy of such tough guys.

Well guess what, you’re not Brucey boy and that’s ok. It’s a film, it’s a fantasy. I don’t care if you’re the toughest cowboy in town or, a bad-ass who can single-handedly take down masses of Russian Terrorists without socks or shoes; heartache can happen to the very best of us. So what’s a guy to do? Well, like many of the scenarios in this programme we have to take a leaf out of women’s book, but modify it to suit our genetic coding and comfort.

It’s normal for men to feel ashamed after a breakup because men aren’t supposed to feel anything at all. It’s time for a shift in thinking…

**CLICK HERE FOR THE NEXT CHAPTER**

Typically speaking, when a woman endures heartache, she calls upon her reliable network of friends and they arrange a meet-up in military fashion. She’ll talk, her friends will listen. She’ll cry, her friends will cry with her, while watching movies together and putting in a shift of boosting her vulnerable self-esteem. This is what is affectionately known as a ‘support group.’ A support group is basically a group of people, who provide each other with morale support in a time of need, and this is what you could do with right now.

Don’t worry… I’m not suggesting you call your Mate “Dave” up and demanding he hugs you while you cry together watching ‘Dirty Dancing’ with a tub of Ben n’ Jerry’s!! (Unless that sounds tempting, go knock yourself out). One of the reasons women heal faster after a breakup is the fact that they have an amazing network of people to talk to and confide in. Research shows that women tend to have more friends than men, due to their sociable nature and also that typically, men rely on romantic relationships for emotional support while women rely on their peers. Don’t believe me? Think hard about that friend of yours who you don’t hear from anymore since he got with his gal. Maybe you were that guy??

One thing to consider is you are NOT looking for pity. Nevertheless, you need SOME sort of support group. Typically, as a guy your first choice of a support group will be a group of guys who want to take you out and get beer down your neck in order to “just forget about her.” Although they mean well, you should approach this invitation with caution or you will find yourself drunk-dialing ‘whats-her-name’ or even worse – turning up at her door. Not cool.

At the same time, you don’t want to be boring the shit out of your peers by telling them how you are suffering more than anybody else in the history of man-kind right now. No matter how caring your friends or family are; there will come a point where it’s too much and you will only bring those people down with you. Definitely not cool.

You will also find that if you had that type of support group, you will receive a concoction of advice from different people who have had different experiences. You do NOT need to be confused right now. So what’s your option?

The FREE Ex Girlfriend Forum

I decided to write this programme not only as a guide to faster healing, but also to create a candid support group for guys who are struggling with a break up. I had nobody to talk to when I was at my lowest and I found most of the online advice to be totally shit and detrimental to my healing. This guide and the ex girlfriend forum are the tools I wish I had when I was paralyzed with fear, sadness and most of all I felt like nobody understood.

On the forum you will have people who understand exactly how you feel and what you’re going through, (one of them being me) and nothing beats empathy when you’re miserable. That’s right, you don’t need sympathy – you need empathy! Not someone to say “poor you,” but for someone to say; “I understand how you feel.” That is way more powerful than receiving the puppy-dogged eye treatment and these are extremely powerful words when said and meant. You’ll witness people at different levels of a breakup than you are. You’ll see people ahead of you, or hopefully people way behind you and you’ll think to yourself “poor bastard, I remember when I was that screwed up.”

One breakup advice cliché I do agree with is writing your negative feelings out. It helps you to understand your feelings better and you’ll get to write your demons out on the forum without anybody judging.

I’m so confident in this guide that I truly believe you will witness success stories in the ex girlfriend forums that will inspire you to feel hope, get better and take control of your life. I will encourage you to mix with other guys as I look to build a community here. If you’re not ready for that yet, you can simply read other guys feelings on the forum and see if you can relate at all.

Weekend Waller

It’s important to choose a few days (when you are not at work or needed) to feel sad. That’s right; I want you to choose sadness. Allow yourself to be as miserable as possible, but make sure it’s within reason (and don’t fucking call her, please). It’s you’re right as a human to feel sad and it’s vital you acknowledge this emotion. Your male brain may try to hijack this and look for a distraction but trust me, running from your feelings on this will catch up on you. Plus, it’s only for two days.

Chapter Summary:

. You’re not Bruce Willis and that’s just fine, although it would be pretty cool to shout “Yippee ka-yay, motherfucker!” while blowing shit up, this I can’t deny

. It’s ok to say “I’m struggling” sometimes and it doesn’t make you less of a man

. Women heal faster because they confide in their support group, your best support group is right here and the ex girlfriend forum because it’s full of people who understand how you feel.

A Polite Warning:

The next few pages of this guide are going to contain some written exercises that will take a few minutes. If you are anything like me, you might be tempted at this point to skip over the exercises and start reading the next chapter, especially if you are in a hurry or have had a shitty day. For your own sake, please don’t! I will tell you why.

When I first started learning about this topic, I was too quick to hear an idea, agree with it and move on to the next without really taking it in or taking action. I never stopped to actually experience it for myself or absorb the information, until it was too late. I think that on some level I thought I was maybe smart enough to understand it without writing anything down or doing anything that would change my feelings. There is no magic potion, gents.

You can easily forget information and you do not take in 100% of every written word you read. Writing down these activities will NOT take much time and they will get easier. I’m not asking you to do this for shits and giggles guys, I’m asking you to do it because I have 100% conviction it will help you! And that’s my job here, I won’t say it again. I’m giving you the tools that you need to get over your ex girlfriend and get on with your life as quickly as possible. It’s up to you if you want to use them. Peace out!

Chapter Exercises

. Register absolutely free to the ex girlfriend forum and introduce yourself to the community. (You don’t have to use your real name, full anonymity will be respected if you desire). You aren’t alone, my sad friend.

**Please Note** After registering, check your junk mail for registration details. Also, ignore the grey toolbar that appears when you sign in. It’s worthless and I’m looking in to getting rid of it, thanks.

. Change your crazy-ass, spam paranoid, password to something more memorable in your profile when you’re all registered

. Choose sadness when alone for a few days, it’s your divine right as a human being to be sad

. Introduce yourself here in the forum

**CLICK HERE FOR THE NEXT CHAPTER**

Repeat after me: “After giving myself the permission to be sad; I am now going to choose to man the fuck up!” I reckon the title of this chapter might come as something as a surprise to you. You might be thinking something along the lines of; “so you give me loads of new age crap about feeling our emotions and now you are telling me to suddenly man up?”

You betcha.

As stated in the previous chapter, there is nothing wrong with looking for help. There is nothing wrong with admitting you are sad and there is certainly no crime in admitting that you are struggling with your breakup. There is nothing wrong with seeking empathy. I’ll tell you what is wrong though – continuing to play the victim card and letting this setback control your life in a negative way, allowing it to destroy you.

Choosing to completely feel your sadness can feel quite liberating, but there has to be a timeline on it. The reason for this is because you can become addicted to your pain. Yes, as fucked up as it sounds – you can become addicted to sadness. The more you dwell upon a subject the more you are inclined to flounder in your own misery and make a habit of it. And why is that so? Because it’s easier, that’s why. When you are feeling the hardest hit, it’s easier to make excuses to why you can’t make it better. It’s easier to dwell in your own misery and stumble around in inaction, than it is to take action and rise above this agonizing time and crack on with your life. Sometimes life throws these curve balls at you and when it does; Manning the fuck up is the only option.

Well guess what, you’re not going to choose easy. From this moment on you’re going to man the fuck up, take back control of your life and become an even better man. The key to the break up survival is dignity. Being a pathetic, sobbing, begging wretch or being verbally abusive towards your ex is not going to make things better. Hold your head up and have some respect for yourself and man the fuck up.

Easier said than done though, huh?

Yes it is, I’ve been there and it’s hard not to shut yourself away from the world and it’s hard to know how to start getting better. Well this is your first step…

Look Good

It’s as simple as that and as superficial as it sounds, it certainly does help. You see it’s easy to feel sorry for the sad, unshaven and dishevelled looking bum in the mirror. Right now I want you to make nothing less than a 100% effort with your appearance.

I want you to be open and honest with yourself right now; what needs tweaking? Maybe you’ve let your hair grow untidy? Call the hairdresser and book an appointment ASAP. Maybe you’ve grown a messy, grubby beard that doesn’t go with your withdrawn ‘woe is me’ puppy dog eyes? Shave it off. Now. Don’t give a shit about what clothes you are wearing tomorrow? Start to give a shit; get your best clothes ready now.

Looking good in order to feel good; this is one thing that women do and they do really well post breakup. Have you ever bumped in to an ex girlfriend and she’s suddenly become insanely hotter than ever?? Well it’s no coincidence, it’s because they’ve been working on themselves. I’ve heard conspiracy theories that women do this in order to screw with your head and it’s a revenge attempt as if to say “look at what you’re missing.”

I disagree; don’t buy into that crap and don’t focus on it. Of course, some women will have this warped mindset but it’s not about that. Women have clocked on to the fact that they deserve to feel and look their personal best. It’s a motivational boost that is vital in order to progress after a breakup.

Still not convinced? Why do you think pretty much every single armed force in the entire world requires their soldiers to shave, iron, march and clean to perfection? It’s because they understand the connection that looking like shit on the outside has a direct affect on how the individual feels on the inside. When you look shit, you start to feel shit and vice versa. It’s not rocket science, soldier. To get over your personal war you need to man up by accepting you feel pain, but marching onwards regardless. Allow Mr Sly Stallone to put it in a better way:

Chapter Exercise

Next step

Shaving and haircuts are stuff that can instantly improve your appearance, but some other things take time. So here’s what I want you to do…

Get naked.

I’m serious. Yes, I did say that. No, don’t worry; I’ve not tricked you to joining this site for a perverted alterior motive, I don’t want any pictures. What I do want you to do is walk over to a mirror and write down here what you don’t like about your body. It has to be changeable stuff, don’t sweat the receding hairline. And I’m sure I don’t have to remind you to do it in the company of your own home

Be brutal. Be honest. Have you acquired ‘relationship fat?’ Maybe you’re the opposite (like I was) and you’ve suffered a loss of appetite leaving you closer to resembling Christian Bale in ‘The Machinist?’ What would you like to change? Write it down. Don’t be embarrassed; this is your personal journal of improvement and you can choose to hide your identity on the forum. This can be quite a depressing thing to do at first but it will suddenly become more empowering, trust me. Pull no punches with this for maximum effect.

So what did you come up with? Start writing an exercise plan here immediately, targeting what you want to change. You’re back on the market now, son.

Congratulations, you’re on your way to improving yourself inside and out. I know some people loathe exercise, but guess what – you need it. Don’t be lazy. The benefits of exercise are huge. You’re a man, you are designed to run and push your body to limits. Man up and start an exercise plan right now. Ask in the forum for advice (or just Google) if you’re new to the world of exercise. I’m also considering creating an exercise resource guide to go alongside this chapter. Try not to feel too daunted, getting in to shape takes time and effort. If you’re seriously unhealthy and unfit just start with brisk walks for half an hour and build from there.

I could bang on about the importance of exercise some more, but I’d need a whole new guide for that. Just remember this simple equation: Exercise=Confidence.

Confidence will be your saviour. Chances are your confidence levels are low right now. Well, let’s work on that.

Don’t surrender. Take pride in your appearance. And please write this all down!

**CLICK HERE FOR THE NEXT CHAPTER**

The No Contact Rule is absolutely vital in order to heal after a breakup and if ignored can seriously halt your quest to get over your ex girlfriend. Part one of this guide examines and explains the very few exceptions to the No Contact rule. I have devoted a substantial amount on this subject for a reason – I believe it’s where a lot of guys go wrong and it’s the absolute golden rule of surviving a breakup.

So what exactly is the ‘no contact rule?’ Well I’m pretty sure you’ll already know, but allow me to elaborate.

So you’ve had your heart shit on from a large height, you’ve begged, pleaded and lost all dignity after failing to win back your ex girlfriend. Or maybe you’ve broken up with her and although you know it’s for the best, you find yourself hanging on even though it’s doing you no favours. The No Contact rule is when you completely cut yourself off from your ex and cut her out of your life, the two variations of NC are:

1.)  Informing your ex girlfriend that you won’t be contacting her anymore and that she shouldn’t contact you

2.)  Cut off contact with your ex girlfriend, don’t tell her and ignore any efforts of her contacting you

So here’s the conundrum – which one do you choose? There isn’t a perfect choice and everyone has their own personal situation, but I prefer number one. I’ll leave the option up to you, if you’re not on speaking terms, number two is perfect. If you are keeping in contact and it’s doing your queasy-stomached feeling no good, choose number one. Nevertheless – stick to your decision and stay strong! I’ll help you to compose a NC message later on if you’re up for it but stuck for words.

Now this is somewhat a controversial subject and I’m sure it will lead to the word “but” being used in abundance.

“But you don’t understand”…”

“But she’s my best friend”…

“But I need her…”

“But she needs me…”

Enough already! I’ll explain in further detail the pros and pros of NC but first I will discuss the very few delicate exceptions to this integral rule:

The Exceptions to The No Contact Rule:

You and your ex girlfriend have children together:

In an ideal world you could just disappear off the face of the earth because you have only your own feelings to consider. Unfortunately this is not an ideal world and if you have children, it’s a much trickier situation. If you have little ones feelings to consider, don’t bring the kids in to this and don’t use them as a pawn in any sick kind of game. Tell whats-her-name something like; “look, I know this isn’t an ideal situation, but I think it’d be better if we only contact each other if it concerns our child/children.” Say it with confidence and without bitterness, if she’s unreasonable then that’s her problem, be the better person and you’ll be thankful for it later on.

You work with her:

Ouch mate, very ouch! If it’s not the job of your dreams then I suggest an intense job hunt. You’ll have a double fresh start and a new distraction, not to mention a change of environment. If it is the job of your dreams, stay professional and never ever talk about your former relationship and spend as little time as possible together. You could say the same to her with regards to no contact as the above example but replace the word “children” with “business” or “work-related.”

You have shared financial responsibilities:

Whatever it is; mortgage, car payments or credit card debts – you must act immediately. Don’t let it draw out, attack it before it becomes too much of an issue. You might need to meet up if you are required to sign papers and its best you do it sooner rather than later. Note that after my 1^st breakup I did this the wrong way round. I held out for a month of No Contact, only to have to meet up to discuss our shared debts. Then I found myself back at square one. With whats-her-name number two I had learned my lesson and took the bull by the horns; sorted out everything fast, then implemented the No Contact Rule. It made things substantially easier.

Well that’s the end of the exceptions. If you don’t qualify for any of the above then I’m afraid the no contact rule is compulsory for you. So are you up for it? Well you better be, because going ex girlfriend cold-turkey is something that requires 100% downright commitment.

I’m sure you will have some doubts in your mind on this and I’m not going to pretend it’s easy. While the complete loss of a person from your life who you once shared an important time with is painful in itself, the benefits far outweigh the initial turmoil and the potential unnecessary suffering.

Before we move on to The No Contact Rule part 2, which will act as a reinforcement of the importance of no contact, I want you to do yourself a favour. If you choose to inform your ex girlfriend about your decision to follow the golden rule of no contact – do it now. Don’t drag them feet now. Say something along the lines of: “Hey, I’ve been thinking and I believe that this is the best thing for us. I really think it’s in our best interests if we cut contact with each other.” Or something similar, do not leave any possibility for her to think it is anything else than what it is. Avoid words like “right now” or “at this time.” Visit this part of the forum, for other examples.

Then press ‘send’ (assuming you have not met up with her).

How does it feel? It should feel good and you should feel damn good about yourself. Why? Because you’ve just taken control of your life, that’s why! But of course you will feel an array of emotions that will contradict your thoughts that race throughout your head.

But what if she replies? Should you reply? Have you made the right decision? It’s quite normal to freak out after this, but not to worry. Go straight to the next page, I’ve got that covered. In fact, have a 5 minute break after this information overload. Men have short concentrations spans and I don’t want you missing the point.

Chapter Summary:

. You need to remove the main source of pain in order to heal, and that source is whats-her-name

. There are a few exceptions, but there are a few tweaks that enable you to use The No Contact Rule as much as possible

. Cold Turkey is not easy, but it’s better for you in the long run

. Be proud when you’ve made the decision, this is symbolic in your recovery

Chapter Exercises:

. If you’re choosing any of the NC message choices, do it now. What are you waiting for?

**CLICK HERE FOR THE NEXT CHAPTER**