Girl and a Dog Blog

Ornery Like a Certain 95 Year Old Man.

noreply@blogger.com (Girl and a Dog) — Tue, 07 Jul 2009 15:31:00 +0000

My ex-husband had a grandfather who was very, very old and lived in an an assisted living apartment in Ft. Lauderdale. He was known to have once chased a group of elderly ladies who were talking too loudly from the pool room while brandishing a pool cue and screaming obscenities.

Another time, when we visited for his 95th birthday, he accused me of stealing from him. We, along with 12 or so other family members, were sitting in the living room of his apartment when he looked over at me and said, "Kelli. Kelli. There was a photo of my son Arthur sitting on the shelf over there. It's not there anymore. Did you take it?" So, I had never even met this man before and now he is accusing me of stealing a picture of some other person that I had never met. Why yes mister, I did steal your picture. I just couldn't imagine the possibility of living a fulfilled life without that photo of Arthur as mine." Not a single person stood up for me or called the man a crazy loon, which would have been the case if this happened in my family, and this is precisely why they are now my EX-family.

To get to my point, this is kind of what Bella is like. She is a grump. Plain and simple. She likes to groan and growl and generally show her dissatisfaction with the state of the world. If you're sitting where she wants to sit, she'll whine. If you accidentally bump her, she give you a dirty look along with a growl of displeasure, and if, God forbid, you try and make her go outside when she does not care to, while she doesn't own a pool cue, she makes use of what she's got throwing an all out dog fit.

Note to Lulu: shhh......

The Subtleties of Sisterhood

noreply@blogger.com (Girl and a Dog) — Tue, 30 Jun 2009 18:26:00 +0000

I just walked past the door and happened upon this scene. My first thought was, "Oh, that is sooo sweet. Lulu went to sit by Bella, two peas in a pod." Upon closer inspection, I realized that Bella is laying on top of Lulu's leash so, while I would like to believe that this scene is all about love, I think it is much more likely that Lulu is being held hostage, knowing if she dares to move and disturb the Queen, she will get growled at.

Ahhh... sisterhood.

While I Was Out...

noreply@blogger.com (Girl and a Dog) — Sun, 22 Feb 2009 19:35:00 +0000

Pardon the complete and total lack of posts as of late, life has been a bit crazy. I honestly didn't think that anyone actually read my blog but since I keep getting asked when I am going to start posting again, I have deduced that maybe it is just the people in my own household that don't read my blog.

Just a quick little catch up about what has been going on since I have posted:

- Bella turned 5!

- The pipsqueak turned 1

- Baby YTBB (yet to be born) is now -9 weeks and counting

- My butt (amongst other parts) got significantly larger

- Lulu got hit by a car/truck, yet walked away unscathed

- Scott took a new job

- His new job is in Connecticut

- We sold our house

- We had to do significant remodeling before we could sell our house

- We rented a house in New York (on the CT border)

- We have not actually seen said house in person

- We are trying to figure out the logistics of getting one uncomfortably pregnant lady, one crazy puppy, one grumpy dog, and one poor guy, who will surely be in need of Xanax, moved half way across the country.

If nothing else, I'm sure it will be an adventure. It always is. :-)

Merry Christmas to all...

noreply@blogger.com (Girl and a Dog) — Tue, 30 Dec 2008 20:51:00 +0000

and to all a good night.

I'm Thankful for the Crazies

noreply@blogger.com (Girl and a Dog) — Thu, 27 Nov 2008 19:04:00 +0000

Happy Thanksgiving to my sweet little peanuts. I am thankful for all of the love, joy, and general chaos that they bring to my life. I can't imagine how completely dull life would be without The Goose and Crazypants. I am thinking of you both as I laboriously lay on the beach each day in Hawaii. Thanks for being my sweet friends Bella & Lu, and get ready... life is about to get a whole lot crazier.

Seriously?

noreply@blogger.com (Girl and a Dog) — Fri, 14 Nov 2008 20:43:00 +0000

So it seems that little Lu may be going through some sort of mental breakdown. Last weekend it was the scary scary ribbons and today she has decided to add the television to her list of evil-doers. That would be the same television, in the same place, doing the same thing that it always has.

She has been sitting on her pillow growling at the tv for about an hour and a half now. Well, that might not be fair, she only growls when something on the tv moves. Needless to say, I am about to completely lose it. Even Bella has started to give her dirty looks.

Maybe, like Scott, she thinks that I may not have the greatest taste in television programming. Is it possible that the two of them could be in cahoots and this is some sad little attempt to try and make me turn off the tv and clean the house? I'm going to put on Animal Planet and see if that helps. Otherwise, it may be Puppy For Sale. Dirt. Cheap.

Update: Rob Lowe just came on Oprah and Lulu is going crazy. Apparently not a fan. I guess she is too young to appreciate his work as Billy in St. Elmo's Fire.

Evil Like Babies, Bunnies, and Rainbows

noreply@blogger.com (Girl and a Dog) — Mon, 10 Nov 2008 20:54:00 +0000

On Saturday night, we were sitting in the living room watching a movie when we heard a growl coming from the other room. Bella was, as usual, splayed out on her pillow trying to recover from a long day of napping so I used my powers of deductive reasoning to figure ou that it was Lulu. Growling is somewhat new for Lulu. If we are out on a trail and unexpectedly run into someone she deems sketchy, she will produce a low, guttural grown and usually run the other way.

Scott went to check on her and I asked what she was growling at. He said, "I have no idea, she seems to be growling at the corner." Um, okay. So we went back to the movie and called her in to the room. She came in, but a few minutes later was growling somewhat ferociously (for Lulu). My thought was that some kind of rodent got into the house while letting the girls in or out and that we just weren't seeing it. I got up and went into the room and really tried to determine what she was growling at and finally figured it out. Are you ready? It's pretty scary. Here goes:

Yep, she was growling at a jar of pretty ribbons. Scott took the jar down to show her and she ran up to it, growled, and then hauled out of the room. We still have no idea what she found so disturbing about the ribbon jar but what I find most interesting about this whole scenario is that the jar of ribbons have been in the exact same place since we brought her home in March. In fact, I have probably not even picked it up to dust, and now it is back in its place and she seems fine with it. So I guess either my ribbon are possessed by The Devil or Lulu is one fry short of a Happy Meal. I know what my guess is.

Stink, Stank, Stunk

noreply@blogger.com (Girl and a Dog) — Mon, 27 Oct 2008 21:21:00 +0000

I recently returned from the scene of the "armadillo incident." Apparently, I was not a very animal friendly person in a past life and I am now being punished for all the prior sins of my former self.

The weather here has turned cool and breezy, giving the girls an extra dose of, in my opinion, unnecessary energy. Since they were being fussy, I packed them up in the car and we headed out to play. For some reason, lately, every time we go to this particular location, Lulu becomes quite disobedient, not listening, running off, and generally being a pain in the behind. Nearing the end of our walk, I could tell that she was considering taking off, so I leashed her and headed back to the car.

I hadn't really given much thought to Bella, as she usually sticks pretty close. I called her and she was pretty far back, obviously enamored with something sure to be gross. I told her to "leave it," which she usually obeys but not so much today. So I, being too lazy to go all the way back and get her, proceed to watch her somersault into God Knows What on the ground and rub around in it. Now Bella isn't really known to roll in disgusting things so I am thinking this must be super special for her to partake in. Finally, after about 10 minutes, she comes trotting up, happy as a clam.

Well, I am not so happy. I am already annoyed and then get the joy of smelling her coming about 15 feet before she gets back to us. I look her over and notice that she is covered in what I can only describe as smelly, smelly goo. I still, two hours later, can not figure out what this goo actually is and, in order to not have to make myself gag more than I already have today, have decided not to delve any deeper into this mystery.

I have these wipes in my car and spent a good ten minutes wiping her down. I thought I had done a decent job until I closed the door to my car and dared to breathe. The stench, which I will spare you from describing, was unbearable. I swear if we were a little closer to home, I would have made her trot along side the car. Of course, to keep "Bella pace" I would have had to drive about -2 mph.

Once we arrived home, I tried to scurry her into the bathroom, bribing her with her favorite treats, the equivalent of dog crack. She ran into the bathroom, grabbed the treat from me, and hauled ass back down the hall and into her fort. Bella's "fort" is underneath the dining room table. That is her safe place and where she goes when she is feeling scared, vulnerable, or just plain doesn't want to do something.

Getting Bella out of her fort is almost impossible. There are a few tricks that sometimes work and I tried all such tricks to no avail. I have given up for now, which may sound lame but, believe me, is just a matter of being realistic. She may have won this battle but just wait until Scott comes home and BAM, we win the war. You will be bathed you stinky stinky dog. Until then, I will just concentrate on breathing through my mouth.

Happy HOWLeween

noreply@blogger.com (Girl and a Dog) — Mon, 27 Oct 2008 17:33:00 +0000

Here's wishing you a Happy Howleween from Bella and Lu. Yes, I am aware that I need to update my technology and that not everyone enjoys watching sideways dark videos but I figured it would be in the spirit of Halloween.

Have a howling good day!

Misunderstood

noreply@blogger.com (Girl and a Dog) — Fri, 24 Oct 2008 18:24:00 +0000

Yesterday, I was at the dog park and a woman started a conversation with me about the girls' collars. I told her that it was my business and we chatted. She called over 2 of her friends to show her the collars and I noticed that one of the women was carrying a leash that I had made. She was a very nice older woman with a thick German accent. The next part of the conversation went something like this:

Me: "Oh, that is one of my leashes."

Her: "No it isn't"

Me: "Hmm, can I see it?"

Her: "Sure"

(So I look at the leash and absolutely know that I made it and hand it back to her)

Me: "Are you sure. I really think that it is"

Her: "No, my daughter bought it for me"

Other lady: "I think she got it at Petsmart"

Me: "I don't think they carry these at Petsmart"

Other lady: "Oh yes they do, they have several cute designs"

At this point I feel like I am in an episode of the Twilight Zone but don't know what else I can do to convince these ladies that, in fact, it is one of my leashes. So I think to myself, "Whatever crazy ladies." I tell them to have a nice a day, and continue on our walk.

A couple minutes later, I run into the woman with the leash and she says to me that she thinks there was a misunderstanding. Apparently she thought that I was literally saying that the leash was mine, as if she had taken my leash. So, while I thought they were crazy for not understanding that I really did make her leash, they thought I was accusing her of stealing my property. I guess in the kingdom of crazy, that would make me the Queen.

Roadkill

noreply@blogger.com (Girl and a Dog) — Mon, 13 Oct 2008 00:12:00 +0000

For all of you non-Texans, let me introduce you to the armadillo. Be sure and take a close look at this beautiful creature. It is kind of like a possum (and who doesn't love a possum?), but with a lovely shell. It also somewhat resembles a shelled rat. I don't believe that I have ever seen an armadillo alive, only as quintessential roadkill splayed on the side of the highway.

I saw an armadillo today and, while it had already met its demise, it wasn't on the side of the road, nor was I in my car. Nope. While on our evening walk, Lulu proudly pranced up to me with a dillo hanging from her mouth. I had the joy of spending 5 minutes wrestling one of God's most stunning creations from her mouth only to have her run back 2 minutes later, giving me the opportunity to repeat the process.

So, while my dear husband was somewhere in Boston, presumably swilling cocktails and having a fabulous dinner, I was spending my evening extracting rodent roadkill from Lulu's jaws.

Good times.

For Anyone Thinking How Much Fun It Would Be To Have Rhodesian Ridgebacks...

noreply@blogger.com (Girl and a Dog) — Mon, 06 Oct 2008 20:23:00 +0000

Consider this fair warning. This is what Ridgebacks like to do when they are not busy lying on their pillows, basking in the sun, or trying to steal food from unsuspecting victims. They also enjoy displaying these types of shenanigans when people come to visit. I can be sitting at home having a perfectly peaceful afternoon, the dogs snoozing away and having shown no signs of any action, beyond lifting their heads to check for treats that might be falling from the sky, in hours. Then, someone will come over and all bets are off.

Apparently, to the average Ridgeback, having a stranger enter the house is secret code for, "READY? GO FOR IT! New person in the house. Let's make it good! " Now, unless the visitor has a Ridgeback or two of their own, they usually look at you with 1. shock, 2. bewilderment, 3. dismay, and 4. pity. At this point I will try and explain that, no, they aren't always like this, that in fact, it is sometimes hard to even get them up off their pillows to go outside and go potty. They will usually nod and look at me like, "um hmm, sure." Hasty exits tend to follow shortly thereafter.

Sometimes I think back to the pre-Lulu days. Everything was so much simpler (and quieter) back then. Then I look at the two crazies, rolling around on the floor, howling/ barking at the top of their lungs, and a huge smile comes across my face. I wouldn't trade it for the world.

Lulu Rides the Short Bus

noreply@blogger.com (Girl and a Dog) — Tue, 30 Sep 2008 17:31:00 +0000

These pictures were taken when my friend Jes (hi Jes!) took Lulu for the day. Jes has 2 Ridgebacks, Dakota, who probably weighs more than she does, and Aby, who is her boyfriend's dog. Jes also has a Chocolate Lab named Bailee, who could not be found in the picture, as she was left at home for lack of being a Ridgeback.

So Jessica took the dogs for a morning hike at Turkey Creek and then later in the day they headed to Blue Hole in Wimberley. When they got in the truck to head to Wimberley, apparently Dakota decided to assert his dominance over Lulu by growling at her every time she touched him. As you can see from the photo above, this gave Lulu very little room to maneuver, causing her to be growled at frequently.

This was Lulu's solution to the problem. While I give her huge props for ingenuity, I can't help to, once again, wonder what in the world goes through that dog's head. I have never in my life seen a dog sit like this by choice, much less in a car. I have had these photos for several months and every time I think of her cruising down the road in this position with that look on her face, I can't stop giggling. What can I say? She is one of a kind.

By all means, please make yourself comfortable

noreply@blogger.com (Girl and a Dog) — Tue, 23 Sep 2008 17:59:00 +0000

When Bella was young, I really had a hard time accepting that she didn't want to snuggle with me. I used to daydream about how nice it would be for her to sleep in bed with me. Well, I got to fufill my dreams with Lulu, who LOVES to snuggle and thinks that sleeping in bed is the greatest thing in the world. Be careful what you wish for, as now, I would give anything to get that darn mutt out of my bed!

Originally, the plan was that Lulu could get in bed as soon as it was light outside. Yes, I know that this is a faulty plan since we could never quite effectively communicate this idea to her. All she understood was, "Sweet, now I'm allowed on the bed." Little by little, she began jumping in bed at an earlier time. Sometimes she was like a ninja and neither of us even heard/felt her, while other times she would land on some part of my body, causing me to curse her, visions of newly forming bruises floating through my head while trying to fall back asleep.

Lately, her bed interloping has become even more brazen, as if it is her God-given right. At some point during the night, I will usually wake up freezing cold, as the covers have been pulled off of me. I will be relegated to the tiniest little edge of the bed, alarmingly close to toppling off the side and Lulu will have her ENTIRE body smushed into me as if she is trying to accomplish this final feat.

What is most interesting about the whole situation is the fact that Lulu has somehow acquired the ability to transform her 65 pounds into at least 250 pounds of lead weight. I have about as much success moving her when she is splayed out on the bed as I would trying to pull a semi-truck with one of those straps around my forehead. Also somewhat bothersome is waking up with your dog's face less than 1" from your own, her nose pressed against yours, as if performing some odd form of doggie nose-to-nose resuscitation. Move your nose, she moves hers. Seriously, it's kind of weird.

I decided that I just couldn't take it anymore and she needed to sleep in her own bed so, the other night, we started out with her in her bed. At about midnight, I woke up to a tiny pathetic little whine. I turned on the light and Lulu was sitting sweetly right by the bed looking at me with the saddest little puppy dog expression. Her little eyes could barely stay open and she put one paw on the bed and let out a tiny whimper. I screamed as loud as I could, "GET IN YOUR BED! NOW!" and she headed back to her bed and hasn't tried to get in our bed since. Yeah, so anyways, that is my dream version. What really happened was that I was a complete pushover and let the little punk back in bed. She has been bugging the bejesus out of me every night since.

Dear Lulu,

noreply@blogger.com (Girl and a Dog) — Tue, 16 Sep 2008 14:44:00 +0000

Dear Lulu,

I thought that the time has come for us to have a little talk. It has come to my attention that maybe you have become just a tad too interested in the potty goings on of both yourself and others.

While it is quite amusing to watch you in your tripod potty pose straining and contorting your neck to be able to view what is happening back there in realtime, given that you go potty several times a day and are now over 8 months old, I would think that maybe you would have realized by now that, yes, the same thing comes out every time. It's like you think that maybe, just maybe, one time you'll look back and be pooping jerky bones. I hate to break it to you little Lu, but I don't think it's gonna happen and, if it does, you'll still be the first to know, whether you're looking at the exact moment or not. Meanwhile, losing your balance while trying to see and falling into your poop on a daily basis is not cool.

I have also been asked by Bella, and a host of other dogs that have been intruded upon, to suggest that maybe it would be possible for you to back off a bit while other dogs are doing their business. Running up to dogs in the park and putting your face 2 inches from their junk mid-business is not especially appropriate behavior. Might I suggest that you could establish say a 4-foot privacy zone around all potty-going dogs, which you could stay outside of until all processes have been completed. Then, have at it, and explore to your hearts content. I promise your won't be missing out on much.

Lastly, both Scott and I would like to request that the privacy zone apply to us also. I know it might be a surprise to you, but having you run up to me and literally try and stick your entire head between my legs while I am "otherwise occupied" seems just slightly weird to me. I mean maybe it's just me, but I'm not really comfortable with it.

Please know that I am in no way trying to stifle your, shall we say, uniqueness. I promise that, even if you adjust this one idiosyncrasy, you will still remain plenty "unique." Plenty.

Love,

Respect My Authoritah!

noreply@blogger.com (Girl and a Dog) — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 21:23:00 +0000

The following scenario happens at least once a day in our household. Each time that I head to the bathroom, Bella and Lulu follow me so as not to miss all the fantastically interesting things that happen in the bathroom. Bella usually plants herself down right in front of the door so that she can make sure that no harm comes to me and/or to prevent my escape through the small window above the tub. Lulu sits behind her, presumably helping to hold up the wall.

After I am finished putting my hair in a ponytail, washing my hands, or doing whatever one may do in the bathroom, I step over Bella and head to wherever I am going (usually my computer). After a few minutes, I will begin to hear a low whine/cry coming from the hallway. As per usual, the volume and intensity will continue to escalate until I go to see what, pray tell, could possibly be going on.

What is going on is that Lulu wants to get past Bella but is too scared to do so. There is, most likely, plenty of room for her to pass, but Lulu will sit there until Bella moves, at which point she will bolt past her, another dicey situation narrowly averted. This same situation happens in the car when Bella decides to lay down across the backseat, forcing Lulu to the back and away from the window that she is so keen to stick her mini-head out of.

Most interesting to me is the fact that, for the most part, Bella is incredibly tolerant of Lulu. Just this morning, Lulu was trying to force Bella into playing with her by standing about 3 inches from Bella's head and barking her incredibly high-pitched bark incessantly straight into Bella's ear. Bella just sat there calmly ignoring the fact that Lulu exists, while I, on the other hand, was furiously Googling puppy voice box removal on the internet.

There are times when Lulu does get growled at, but that is usually when Bella is sleeping and Lulu strays a bit too close to Bella's rear end. I can only assume that Bella is somehow communicating some warning to Lulu that I am not aware of. Now, all I have to do is figure out how to channel some Bella mojo for myself then BAM, they won't know what hit them and I'll be playing them like a fiddle (I do realize this whole scenario is highly unlikely, but it doesn't hurt to dream).

I Heart Bella Bleu

noreply@blogger.com (Girl and a Dog) — Fri, 05 Sep 2008 18:17:00 +0000

Scott and I ended up with Bella because of my brother-in-law's dog, Desmo. Desmo was just an incredibly great dog and I loved him like he was my own. During the process of debating what kind of dog to get, we found out that Desmo's sister Scooby was expecting a litter. I could think of nothing better than having a dog just like Desmo. We brought Bella home and quickly found out that Bella had no intention of being Desmo II (duh). While they did share some characteristics, such as refusing to go outside in the rain and stubbornly locking up at any moment during a walk, usually in the middle of a busy intersection, she completely missed out on the traits I was so looking forward to such as being affectionate and wanting to snuggle up with me on a couch or bed.

Bella is her own dog and does things her own way. She does not give love indiscriminately, it needs to be earned. People are drawn to Lulu because she is pure love and happiness, while Bella is a harder nut to crack. She is uncomfortable, ill at ease, and nervous around new people and situations. I understand that, I am kind of like that too. I wish I could scoop her up and make it all okay for her, but I can't, as that would be highly uncomfortable for her. There are many times when she does need love and affection, but it is usually in a standing position, in order to hasten a speedy retreat if necessary.

What Bella is, however, is incredibly loyal. She is my friend. Actually, she is my best friend. We spend an enormous amount of time together, and have since she was a puppy. She knows what I am feeling and vice versa. If we are out hiking and someone approaches that worries me, she will, undoubtedly, growl at them. Not exactly cool, but you get my point.

People say that Ridgebacks attach to one person. I am her person. She loves me unconditionally. For me, it is a different experience to love something that needs you, and it makes me love her even more. I know if something happened to me, Lulu would be just fine, but I don't know that Bella would. Have I made her too dependent on me? Possibly, but it's a little late to change that.

When we got Bella, and then Lulu, we made a commitment to take care of them for the entirety of their lives. It is a commitment that I hope I have to uphold for an incredibly long time, as I cannot imagine my life without the joy that they bring. They are as much a part of my family as my husband, parents, and sister. I feel like, in many ways, Bella and I have grown up together. She has taught me so many lessons, the most important being how to love something/someone for what they are rather than what you want them to be. It is a lesson that, once accepted, makes for a much happier life. I am incredibly grateful for that knowledge.

I am now going to go over to where she is laying and try and give her a hug. She is going to jump up, possibly growl, and run away thinking, "Geez, hasn't she learned anything yet?" I have, but I still hold out hope. :-)

Organic Beds

noreply@blogger.com (Girl and a Dog) — Tue, 02 Sep 2008 17:27:00 +0000

This is the first Girl and a Dog organic dog bed. It is made from a certified organic cotton/ hemp blend fabric which is just beautiful. The stuffing is recycled soda bottles and they are all hand silkscreened by moi. Bella and Lu say, "woof, woof, bed is awesome, seriously. now can I have some treats?"

Sticky Situation

noreply@blogger.com (Girl and a Dog) — Thu, 28 Aug 2008 19:14:00 +0000

Both Lulu & Bella love chewing sticks. In fact, Lu loves sticks so much that I got to wake up at 5:30 am to clean up a pile of sticks that she threw up (we're still working on the don't swallow the stick part).

On Monday, we arrived at the parking area for our hike and the lot was full. The only time the lot is ever full on weekdays is, once a month, when a group of "older" folks come out for a hike. They are very friendly and we have never had a problem, with the exception of one time, when I spent a few minutes chatting with a few of them and Bella took that to mean that they were now part of our group (Bella likes keeps track of whomever is in our group and waits for the stragglers). It took about 1/2 mile for me to convince her that they were not, in fact, part of our pack and that she could proceed without the 30 elderly hikers in tow.

On this day, the group was smaller and I pulled the dogs over to the side to let them pass. They all said hello and were walking past when Lulu noticed that several of them were using walking sticks/ hiking poles. Well, Lu set her sights on one man's stick and proceeded to do her BADUMP, BADUMP, BADUMP puppy approach, grabbed the bottom of his pole and tried and take it from him. All the other hikers thought that this was quite funny, but the owner of the pole? Not so much. So he starts trying to poke her to get her away from his pole but, of course, she took this to mean, "let's play," went down into play bow, grabbed the pole in her mouth and began violently shaking her head. After more shaking by Lu and pole poking by the man, I managed to wrestle her away from this poor man's pole and walked away. Actually, Lulu pranced away proudly, while I quickly scurried away, symbolic tail tucked between my legs

Tick Tock

noreply@blogger.com (Girl and a Dog) — Sun, 24 Aug 2008 17:24:00 +0000

When Bella was young, she had a trainer named Sapir. Sapir was a former dog trainer for the Israeli army. Sapir scared the crap out of us and we did whatever he said. Bella followed Sapir around like he was The Messiah. I remember Sapir saying something which I now take issue with, albeit safely from my home halfway across the country. Sapir claimed that dogs have no sense of time. If you ever spend the afternoon in our house, not only will you feel quite sorry for me and run far far away as soon as possible, you will also come to the conclusion that Sapir is full of hooey.

Bella eats twice a day, breakfast is around 7 am and dinner is at 4:27. Why 4:27 you ask? Well, I have figured out the 4:27 is as long as the time can be pushed without one of us losing our mind. The picture above was probably taken around 4:05. At 3:55, she was most likely standing behind the sofa where I was sitting, letting out a moan to indicate that she might, in fact, fall over from starvation at any moment if I was not careful. I usually ignore her, at which point she comes over to the side of the sofa and lays her head on the arm, looking up at me with pathetic eyes and tries a new tactic, the moan/whine combo.

As I kindly provide her with periodic updates such as, "22 more minutes," her moany-whine progressively gets louder, more high-pitched, and more desperate. I continue to ignore her, so she usually runs around in front of me in hopes that it was only my lack of peripheral vision that was standing between her and her dinner. After realizing that this is not the case, she will come over to me, let out another moan, and stick her giant schnoz between me and whatever I am doing. I usually have to tell her that she still has 12 or so minutes left and she should probably go ahead and lay down. She will let out a dramatic groan, letting me know exactly what she thinks of me as she falls to ground with a thud. At this point her eyes are glued to me, waiting for any indication that it is time.

At the slightest movement from me (it could be a sneeze), she will jump up and race to the kitchen and sit waiting for her food to be served. I put her bowl in front her her, she has to wait until I say okay, and then she inhales her dinner. At this point, I have had to endure at least a half-hour of pre-dinner hell for the 30 seconds of sheer bliss she likes to call dinner. And, just for the record, God save you if you are busy at 4:27 because she doesn't care if you are about to take a phone call from the Dalai Lama, 4:27 means 4:27.

Perhaps if we had actually heeded all of Sapir's training advice, Bella would be a normal dog that ate dinner at a normal time and I would be one Valium farther away from a stay in rehab, but where would the fun be in that?

Oilcloth Swatches

noreply@blogger.com (Girl and a Dog) — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 22:16:00 +0000

For those looking for swatches for the oilcloth collars, here they are.....

Hibiscus:

I wanna rock and roll all night....

noreply@blogger.com (Girl and a Dog) — Mon, 18 Aug 2008 14:07:00 +0000

and party every day.

From the Bella puppy archives. This is a real, untouched photo. I was simply taking it because her ears looked funny when, out of nowhere, Gene Simmons channeled her body. doo doo doo doo.

Saving Some for Winter?

noreply@blogger.com (Girl and a Dog) — Wed, 13 Aug 2008 22:54:00 +0000

When Scott came home from work Monday night he was all, "WHAT is wrong with Lulu's face?" Me: "What do you mean?" Him: "Um, HELLO, she looks like a chipmunk." I'm not really sure how I missed the fact that she appeared to have two super balls stuffed into her cheeks but I guess I'll have to give up all my dreams of winning any Mother of the Year Awards.

So Tuesday morning I took Little Bit to the vet. The diagnosis? "Hmm, I'm not really sure what it is. Maybe she got bit. Try some benadryl." I must preface this by saying that I really do like my vet, but, call me crazy, I was hoping for a bit more insight. Furthermore, I kind of think that maybe some sort of diagnosis-less discount could be in order. I'm not asking for free, as I did take her time but, let's be real, I took her time in order to find out what was wrong with my dog and ended up walking out with little more than I came in with, with the exception of the possibility of a peaceful benadryl induced afternoon. I guess that's worth something.

When I got home, I posted on my breeder's Yahoo Groups page and within minutes received several replies saying, "Oh, that happened to my dog too. They told me he/she swallowed a bee," and, while I suppose it is possible that there is a rash of bee-eating Ridgebacks on the loose, I am somewhat dubious. All these replies did, however, provide some much-needed reassurance that she would be fine eventually. I will have to admit I was a bit disheartened to find the general consensus was that the benadryl was not necessary. Then I decided it's probably better to be safe than sorry. Right?

P.S.- Lu wanted me to send this picture along to show Bella isn't the only one that can be a ~~wanker~~ winker.

Because there is nothing cuter than a puppy...

noreply@blogger.com (Girl and a Dog) — Tue, 12 Aug 2008 19:38:00 +0000

Since I have absolutely nothing better to do, such as making the 9 million collars that I need to, I spent the morning looking at sweet photos of Bella and Lulu as puppies and decided to make my very first mosaic. Not exactly a work of art but cute nonetheless. There are 9 Lulu's and 11 Bella's. Sorry Lulu, just a mistake that I was too lazy to fix. Enjoy!

A Sad State of Affairs

noreply@blogger.com (Girl and a Dog) — Fri, 08 Aug 2008 21:40:00 +0000

Today I was starving, so I opened the freezer in search of something to eat. Here is what I found:

2 bags raw diet chicken patties (for Bella, not me)

1 bag raw diet venison patties (smells just like you would imagine it to)

1 bottle Tito's Vodka (precariously close to empty)

1 roll Raw Advantage Organic Chicken Dinner for Dogs

1 bag with remnants of an entire cow femur that was cut up for the pups

1 bag mini York Peppermint Patties (my kind of patties)

1 Amy's Organic Cheese Pizza

1 box Morning Star Veggie Cakes

1 Pint Haagen Dazs Light Mint Chocolate Chip (good stuff)

1 box Caribbean Mix Frozen Fruit Bars (would probably be fab mixed with the vodka)

1 pint Haagen Dazs Raspberry Vanilla Swirl Frozen Yogurt (probably smells like meat)

After a delicious lunch of of veggie cakes and peppermint patties, I was thinking that, given that we have completely given over the freezer to the dogs, you would think that the least they could do is to learn how to run down to the store and fetch mommy some more Titos.