Benefits 

• Deepens Intimacy.
• Aligns Chakras (energy centers).
• Enables eye contact.
• Makes kissing easy.
• Stimulates the A spot and the head of the clitoris due.
• The cross at the angles positions the giving partner closer to the receiving partner’s body encouraging deep penetration.
• The cross at the ankles also raises the hips of the receiving partner from the surface of play, creating a more pleasurable angle for penetration.
• It’s easy for partners to sync their breathing is this position.
• Close proximity makes baby making a breeze if you’re trying to get pregnant.

Hazards 

• Crossing at the ankles and wrapping the legs around the partner on top may not be possible for partners who are larger in size.
• Pressure from the weight of the giving (top) partner’s body may be uncomfortable if not leveraged correctly.
• Penetration may be too deep for partners who find cervical penetration to be uncomfortable.
• Can make escape difficult for couples using the withdrawal method for birth control (pulling out).
• May feel uncomfortable when used by penises with severe curves.
• Crossing the ankles may not be accessible for receiving partners with short legs or thick and short legs.
• If you’re trying to avoid pregnancy, this position may be a threat to birth control.

Where to perform the position

• In a bed.
• On a couch.
• On the floor with pillows underneath the top partner’s knees to prevent bruising or rug burn.
• On a chaise.
• On a day bed at your mama house.
• On the hood of a car parked in a garage.
• On a grassy knoll on top of a blanket underneath you favorite tree in the park.
• On the beach underneath a tent facing the water.

How to get into position 

• The receiving (bottom) partner lays on their back (with pillows underneath the head if performing in a bed). The receiving partner lifts their legs and opens them to allow the giving (top) partner to position themselves in between. The giving partner penetrates the receiving partner while the receiver wraps their legs around the lower back of the giver, crossing the feet at the ankles. The angle of this position can be adjusted using pillows underneath the lower back of the receiver.

Have you ever tried this position? How did it work out for you? Chime in by leaving a comment below!

Please remember to practice safer sex by confirming consent, asking for recent STI tests, using condoms when unsure about a partner’s status, and getting tested regularly. 

Benefits of Yab Yum: 

• Aligns the Chakras (energy centers) of each partner.
• Creates connection through the use of eye gazing.
• Generates communication between the genitals before penetration.
• Places the female partner (or the partner on top) in control of the pace of the position.
• Easy to get into and to switch into different positions from.
• Builds Intimacy.
• Generates body heat because of the close bodily contact.
• Comfortable for both partners.

Drawbacks of Yab Yum:

• Mobility for the partner on top is limited based on core strength.
• The weight of the partner on top must be supported by the bottom, penetrating partner.
• The legs of the partner on top may tire after a few minutes in this position.

Details about Penetration:

• Provides angled penetration.
• Grants access to cervical penetration (heart chakra connection).
• The closeness of bodies produces deep penetration.
• The deeper erogenous zones can be accessed via this position (p spot and a spot)
• Clitoral stimulation is achievable in this position.
• Anal penetration is possible in this position.

How to Perform this position:

• The female partner ( or partner being penetrated) straddles the male (or penetrating) partner with one leg on each side of their body. The feet can be placed flat on the bed or folded behind the bottom partner’s lower back.  Using the shoulders or the back of the neck for support, the partner on top using the tailbone to hinge the hips forward and backward to stroke.  The movement is slow, controlled and short strokes.  The partner on the bottom can assist by holding their partner’s hips for support and gently guiding the motion.

Where to perform this position:

• In the middle of the bed
• At the edge of the bed
• On a couch with wide cushions
• On the floor on a rug or a yoga mat
• In the backyard in the sun or under the moonlight
• On a beach under a palm tree or in a tent

How to make this position Tantric: 

• Envision a red ball of light sitting within your pelvis and your partner’s pelvis. Sync your breathing together and imagine the red ball of light rising and falling within the pelvis as it glows brightly. Continue to keep your breath in sync as you move in rhythm together, and maintain eye contact.

Before I get into how you can begin and maintain your journal, let me explain more about what a erotic journal is specifically.

An Erotic Journal is the place where you document your sexual feelings, sexual desires, fears and experiences.  

Your Erotic Journal is the place where you can be free to express yourself as you please without judgement.  The goal in using the journal is to get into the habit of focusing on your sexuality and making it a norm to discuss it in some form.  Typically, we choose to think about sex when we feel aroused and want to engage in some type of activity to satiate the desire.  While it’s okay to think about sex when we want to meet the need, it’s also a good habit to be aware of when and what you’re thinking about sex throughout your days.  The minute inspiration strikes of any kind is the time you should write in your journal.  You will discover from going back and reading previous entries that sex is on your mind more times than you think.

Steps to beginning a Sex Journal 

1. Go to your local book store, or any store that sells journals,  and choose a journal that speaks to you.  Pick one that has a cover that draws you in and appeals to your senses.  You want to feel connected to this book to have motivation to use it often.
2. Use the inside of the front cover to dedicate the journal to your erotic musings. You can say something like: “I dedicate this journal to my sexual thoughts, experiences and desires.” Whatever you are moved to write in your dedication, make sure to remember that this journal is only for the purpose that you set for it, and nothing more.
3. Make the time to write in your journal. Dedicate at least 5 minutes Daily to write in your journal.  If daily is too much for you, dedicate 3-4 days out of the week to documenting your erotic thoughts.

And that’s it! Creating an erotic journal is simple.  It’s the use of it that often proves to me more challenging for those who aren’t used to expressing themselves in this way.

Pushing beyond your normal expressions is a form of therapy in itself. And knowing that you have the power to shift your perception is a mighty form of medicine. You have autonomy over your life and its experiences. Use your journal to do the inner work that is necessary for your healing and liberation.

1.  ADMIT THAT YOU’VE FALLEN OFF

Go ahead and do yourself a favor and admit that you aren’t happy with where your sex life is right now.  Admittance is the first step in changing anything about your life. Make sure to also admit this to your partner if you are in a relationship.  A happy sex life is a team effort, and you won’t be able to move forward in deriving what you want from your sex life if you and your partner aren’t on the same page.  If you are single, you can have a conversation with yourself that you record on a voice note on your phone, via a video you film of yourself, or document your feelings in a journal.  If you don’t journal at all, now would be a great time to start.  If you don’t know how to begin a journal for yourself, checking out this article on how to do just that.

2. FOCUS ON WHAT YOU WANT

After admitting that you’ve fallen into a rut, it’s natural to begin thinking about all of the things that have gone awry in your relationship with your partner or with yourself.  Refrain from falling into the sunken place of self pity and blame, and immediately begin to think about the sex life that you want to have.  What is your ultimate goal for your sex life? Do you want to have more orgasms? Do you want to take more exotic trips? Do you want to build a larger collection of sex toys? Perhaps you want to have group sex with other like minded people or experience intimacy with the same sex.  Ask yourself the question: “What do I want to experience in my sex life” and make a note of whatever comes to mind.  If you haven’t the slightest clue about what you want, it’s time to do some research.

3. DO SOME SEXY RESEARCH

Make the time to do a quick google search of the things you’re interested in. The internet is filled with sources of information on sex toys, sex acts, sexy get aways and the like.  Beyond taking the your search to the internet, find places in your city that can advocate for your sexual exploration.  Lingerie shops, sex stores, adult clubs, strip clubs, nudist groups, BDSM Clubs, sex positive meet up and more are available to you wherever you live. Have fun discovering new ways to cater to your sexuality and uncovering new things about yourself.

4. MAKE TIME TO PLAY

The only way to improve of your sex life is to put in work! You have to make time to incorporate erotic play into your daily life. Remembering that sex is about exploring intimacy and play is essential to your improvement. Sex isn’t just about reaching an orgasm and feeling good.  It’s also about feeling empowered in your choices as a sensual being and connecting to all of life’s pleasures.  Schedule time for yourself or for you and your partner to connect intimately within the things you’ve pinpointed as interests.  The time you schedule can be as little as 10 minutes or as much as 3 hours.  However much time you feel you need to completely explore your desires without stress or strain, SCHEDULE IT! No one is going to advocate for your pleasure, so it’s your responsibility to make it so.

5. REMAIN COMMITTED TO SEXUAL CONSCIOUSNESS

Your sexual preferences and desires will change as you continue to grow and go throughout life. Make a commitment to remain conscious about where you are in your sexual journey, and check in with yourself often.  You can prevent yourself from falling back into a rut by keeping your sexual needs within the forefront of your consciousness. Remember, your sex life is your responsibility, and the power of enjoyment is in your hands.

We can’t fight anatomy 

For every vagina there is a penis that fits it, and when a vagina meets a penis that doesn’t quite measure up the owner of said penis must know how to put a woman in the right positions to accommodate for a lack of or an overabundance of size.  After being put into the right position, the stroke that follows is just as important.  Whether your penis is too big for the vagina you’re interested in entering or too thin or short for the depth and width of the vagina, the fact of the matter is YOU CAN’T CHANGE PHYSICAL ANATOMY.  There is no such thing as a penis being too small…but there is such a thing as a penis being too small for the vagina it is in.  There are a variety of vaginal sizes and every woman has a preference of what type of penis she prefers to enter her, but no matter what your size is your confidence in how you use the penis you have is sexier than being the owner of a 10 inch wang.

Know the sex positions that work with your penis

How about we focus less on what your size is and more on how to use the size that you currently have.  If you’re still hung up on having what you perceive to be a small penis, let me put some things into perspective for you: The average penis size is 5.5-6inches WHEN FULLY ERECT. So if you are a man that fits within those measurements, you’re penis size is average.  Measure your penis when it is fully erect and not in its flaccid state.  Use a tape measure to accurately measure your penis from the base of the shaft to the meatus (opening) of the penis. If your penis meets a vagina that it can’t properly fit into (too large or too thin) then you must know what sex positions to put your partner in to create a pleasurable experience for the both of you.  According to the kamasutra, a man with a large penis paired with a woman who has a small vagina will always result in a sexual dynamic that isn’t pleasurable for the female (receiving) partner, so in this case shallow strokes and clitoral stimulation are critical.  In the case of a vagina being wider than the size of the penis it meets, the male partner will have to place his lover into positions that narrow the vagina.  Instead of focusing so much on how big your penis is, begin to educate yourself of the hundreds of sex positions in existence.  All you need are 6 go-to positions that can accommodate any vagina you encounter. There will be more education on sex positions here on my blog in the near future.

Stroke game must be proper 

There is more to a dick stroke than the commonly performed “jack rabbit” stroke.  I know I know, you see all of these well endowed men in adult flicks delivering lighting fast, stabbing strokes into your favorite adult starlet’s sacred space with and you believe this is the only way to satisfy.  I have to break the news to you that this stroke is one of many and often more painful than it is pleasurable.  You must know how to slow down your stroke, how to speed it up, how to curve your stroke, how to shallow stoke, how to deepen your stroke when necessary, how to swirl your stroke. And most importantly, you must know how to stroke to LAST. Every woman is stimulated by penetration in different ways. Some enjoy g spot stimulation, while others enjoy deep penetration near or of the cervix.  All of these stroke techniques will be broken down for you in the future on Glamerotica101.com

In 2017 there is no reason why any man shouldn’t be aware of just how important stroke and size is to a sexual dynamic.  Experiencing genital mismatch is common, but it’s nothing to worry yourself about when there are solutions.  Knowing how to position your partner to accommodate for whatever sizing issue there is and knowing how to stroke to seal the deal is what sets the experienced lovers above the rest.  Stop spending so much time obsessing over your penis size and begin to learn how to use what you have properly.  Also, learn how to read a woman’s body and cater to her interests.  There is more to pleasing a woman than what your penis has to offer. Personality, honesty, trust, compromise and being present are just a few of the factors that contribute to an amazing sexual relationship.  Learn how to become a well rounded man who is aware and present and watch how your sex life begins to improve.

Benefits of this position

• The female partner receives direct stimulation of her clitoris
• Arousal can be achieved for both partners (men or women who enjoy performing cunnilingus can become aroused during the act).
• The vagina increases its lubrication
• The vagina lengthens to prepare for penetration
• Blood rushes to the pelvic area to cause the clitoris to become erect, which makes the vagina more sensitive to stimulation
• Endorphins are released into the blood system causing relaxation.
• Performing this position on a table spices up the sexual experience

Hazards in this position

• If the table isn’t strong enough, it may collapse
• The hardness of the table’s surface may be uncomfortable to the female partner after a long period of time
• The performing partner could become light headed if they stand with their legs locked in this position.

Props needed

• A sturdy table
• A Pillow to place behind the receiver’s head (optional)
• Places to perform this position
• The living room Coffee Table
• The dining room table
• An island in the kitchen

HEALTH DISCLAIMER
** Always remember to know the STI status of both you and your partner.  You can find a testing site near you by visiting www.gytnow.org or get tested in the comfort of your own home by ordering your own testing kit at www.mylabbox.com.  Using a barrier during oral sex can reduce your chance of contracting an STI orally.  Use cling wrap, a dental dam or a condom split in half to cover the vulva if you are unsure of your partner’s status**

HOW TO GET INTO POSITION

1. The female partner can either lay herself down on the table if she is tall enough to reach, or the performing partner can carry her to the table and lie her down (this option is sexier and safer for the female partner).
2. Once positioned on her back, the female partner spreads her legs into a “V” shape to allow her partner to position him/herself between her legs
3. The performing partner can either bend his/her knees to bring their face near the female partner’s vulva or position themselves on their knees, whichever is more comfortable depending on the height of the table.
4. The performing partner can grab the female partner’s outer thighs to lift the pelvis closer to their face or to keep the legs spread enough to eat the vulva properly.
5. At this point, both partners should be in position and the king should be ready to feast.

LAY BACK AND ENJOY QUEEN.

Benefits 

• Creates intimacy through eye contact
• It’s comfortable for both partners
• Grants access to the clitoris
• Helps stretch the female partner’s hips to make switching positions more comfortable
• The shape of the vagina changes, which can create a new type of stimulation for both partners
• Easy on the back for women who have lower back issues
• Places the female partner in submission
• Great for lovers of missionary positions
• Shallow penetration is possible in this position
• the female partner can control depth of penetration by using her elevated leg to guide her partner

Hazards

• This position may be uncomfortable for women who aren’t used to stretching
• Can be uncomfortable for men with knee issues

Props to use in this position

• A few pillows underneath the pelvis
• A clitoral vibrator for dual stimulation
• An inflatable wedge to create a more pleasurable angle for the female partner’s body

Places to perform this position

• In a bed in the bedroom
• On a large couch
• On the floor of the living room
• On a beach with black sand
• In the park, in the dark
• In the back of a SUV or large sedan with space for two

SEXUAL HEALTH DISCLAIMER:  Please remember to KNOW YOUR STI status and that of your partner before you begin any sexual activity.  Get tested together by finding a testing site near you. Visit www.gytnow.org to find a testing site near you OR get tested in the comfort of your own home by using at home testing via mylabbox.com  DON’T FORGET TO USE CONDOMS correctly and consistently throughout the entire sexual experience.

How to get into position

**This description is written for the heterosexual couple, but this position can be performed by same sex couples.  Female partner=receiving partner (bottom) and male partner=giving partner (top)**

1. The female partner lays with her back flat on the surface of choice and lifts both legs in the air
2. The male partner positions himself on his knees and places his pelvis near the pelvis of the female partner.
3. Once in position, the male partner takes one leg and places it over his shoulder while guiding the other leg down towards the bed with the knee bent and the lower leg positioned either around his waist or near his leg as pictured above.

Always remember to adjust sex positions for your comfort and have fun! There is no wrong way to do any positions so make it work for you.

Enjoy

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Last year, Amber Rose sparked a mainstream movement with her SLUT WALK, taking a stand against slut shaming and calling on women to be proud to be SLUTS if they so choose to be.

In this video, I lend my advice to the PROUD SLUTS of the world. It’s alright to be a slut if you choose to be, but there are a few things you need to know.