God & Gays: Bridging the Gap The Movie. The Message. The Movement.

Luane's riding 100 miles in summer heat...why?

info@godandgaysthemovie.com (Zernus Productions) — Wed, 01 Apr 2009 23:08:00 +0000

From previous posts, you'll remember Luane ran a marathon (that's 26 back-blowing miles...at once) two years ago with Team in Training which raises funds for Leukemia and Lymphoma research. This year, she's willing to put on very tight pants with a pad in the butt and ride 100 miles (all at once) in summer heat through the mountains of Lake Tahoe, CA to do the Team in Training Century Ride. Our baby Jordan and myself will be there to cheer her on.

We need your help to raise $2500 for the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society. Donate now online at: http://pages.teamintraining.org/sj/ambbr09/lbeck

Since Luane's marathon, a 40-year old teacher of the two boys she helped raise was diagnosed with leukemia and is currently desperately seeking a bone marrow match to stay alive (know anyone who's German and Native American?). She has a husband, she has kids and a life she'd like to live. Luane, who's German but not Native American, couldn't just not do anything.

We're asking for your donation and support for Luane, the teacher, and the thousands of others touched by the disease. Every bit helps so to donate: http://pages.teamintraining.org/sj/ambbr09/lbeck

Meet someone who's alive today because of people giving to Team in Training...below is also a very inspiring story written by Luane's training coach, who's also a cancer survivor.

We all have a story.........Here is part of mine!
Even though I don't like the limelight, I am involved in Team in Training because I do feel that it brings awareness and hope to those that now meet face to face with cancer. All of us will encounter a love done with this deadly disease some day. But, as we become educated, the fearthat cancer carries with it is tackled, and hope is born! With hope comesaction. We can then take steps towards contributing to something greater than ourselves. I truly believe that the greatest satisfaction is not only challenging ourselves to overcome life's many steep mental and physical climbs, but to share the gift of life that each of us holds. Through my surviving Hodgkin's Lymphoma, I want to show that life after chemo, life after radiation, life after spinal cord damage...... is life as we make it. I admit, I still have the fears of a shortened life due to chemotherapy poisoning, a destroyed thyroid and heart damage, but I am not going to let it slow me down. "Life is short" they say, but a childhood friend once told me why *he* did not fear death: he said "it is the lastthing I will ever do, so why worry now?!" Clever. I try and live by thatmotto. With my involvement in Team in Training, I hope in my own way that Ican help give those that will be diagnosed with cancer the same great odds that I have been given. At the same time, helping individuals attain their fitness goals and take on a daunting challenge such as a 100 mile bike ride, gives me immeasurable joy. I have seen so many lives changed! This change happens to those that look fear straight in the eyes, use the resources available to them and then never look back as they work hard to the end. A person's goal is never met in a solo effort however! It is always a team effort. This is the philosophy that Team In Training promotes, and I believe in.

Thank you for your support,

Mike

We all appreciate anything you can give: http://pages.teamintraining.org/sj/ambbr09/lbeck

Thank you for...being you and for being in our lives.

Kim Clark

Portia Apologizes for Marrying Ellen

info@godandgaysthemovie.com (Zernus Productions) — Fri, 27 Mar 2009 16:26:00 +0000

Movie Posters Arrive

info@godandgaysthemovie.com (Zernus Productions) — Sun, 22 Mar 2009 00:50:00 +0000

Our distributor sent us some theatre posters and boy are they huge. We don't know where we'll put them but I'm thinking of taking it around our screenings and talks and take photos with it like Amelie's gnome (and taken over by Travelocity's ad campaign).

Believe it or not, I sometimes forget we have a movie (actually two) available for rental and purchase all over the world. It's a trip when I see it listed on Amazon, in Barnes and Noble and on Netflix. It's been 5 years since our first movie released and I guess I just won't get used to it.

Some people ask what's next for us...Luane wrote a very funny narrative script and we're in pre-production in getting it funded and cast....and when that starts to happen, it'll be for a different blog. In the meantime, we enjoy seeing God and Gays proliferate around the country. Thank you for watching it and we hope it's done ya some good.

Prop 8 Hearing on March 5th in California - A Day in Catholic School

info@godandgaysthemovie.com (Zernus Productions) — Wed, 04 Mar 2009 03:37:00 +0000

This week, I spent an entire day speaking at an all-girl Catholic high school (my third year there) junior's class about the movie and all things GLBT. It happens to be the week the California Supreme Court are also hearing oral arguments on the legality of prop 8. There's a ton of places to go to get filled in so I won't duplicate it here but one thing I said to each class was that they were in live history.

I let the class drive the discussion and we often ended up talking about the whole "us vs. them" societal evil. We talked about the movie Milk, prop 8, the holocaust, interracial marriage, women's suffrage, native american genocide and Chavez's work for the mexican farm workers. Each class would see the connections on how the "us vs. them " paradigm remains alive and well to this day...the "them" just keeps getting updated. Currently the "them" are GLBT folks. Next up, according Rev. Dr. Mel White and many others...actually you can see its been happening for a few years now, are muslims (just ask Sally Kern - see March 2008 postings).

They took a lot away from the discussion and got their questions answered of which they had many. I wish I could do these kinds of talks every day, everywhere. Imagine how much could be accomplished when we actually talk and get to know each other....

See us on Ellen??

info@godandgaysthemovie.com (Zernus Productions) — Sun, 22 Feb 2009 01:21:00 +0000

The first time coming in from the front, the next time from the back. That's my philosophy on how we'll get on Ellen one day. My sister made the first part come true by getting four tix to the Ellen show audience. My mom, sister, Luane and I were on the show with Naomi Watts Wed Feb 18th. My mom and sister were shown 2-3 times, they sat in the "dance row" and Luane and I were on the first aisle she dances on, I had an aisle seat so you see me 2 or 3 times as well. We had a great time, it was a neat experience, my hands hurt from clapping so much. We're half way there...

Before the taping, a friend of mine who edits the TV show Chuck took us for a tour around the Chuck set and we watched the actors block and rehearse a scene. We got to meet one of the Nerd Herd, Scott, who's a very cool guy. He was the character who was a Missile Command champion in a previous episode. We walked around the set, with the baby even who didn't make a sound.

We saw Kristin Chenowyth from Pushing Daisies and Wicked (NY) who fell for the baby's cute cheeks. It was good to be back on the Warner Bros. lot again.

We were only in LA for 24 hours, to do the show and tour and bolt back, man that was a crazy trip. I attached a photo of Luane on the lot with the baby.

I'm Turning 40

info@godandgaysthemovie.com (Zernus Productions) — Mon, 09 Feb 2009 05:18:00 +0000

My big 4-0 birthday is coming up and with the new baby taking up all possible energy, I won't be having my big party with everyone I've ever met in my life boogeying the night away while eating chocolate chip cookies as I had always dreamed. Instead, my mom and sister are in town for my grandfather's memorial 5k run and family reunion so we're going to have a baby shower.

I don't know yet what I'll do exactly on my birthday, but it may involve sleep...I'll have to make it up later in the year, like a 40.75 birthday party.

Racial Workshop...and a baby?

info@godandgaysthemovie.com (Zernus Productions) — Mon, 26 Jan 2009 04:11:00 +0000

This weekend, I've been helping shoot video for a weekend workshop Rev. Deborah L. Johnson is running on the Power of Privilege. She's taking on the hardest and deepest wounds around racism...and connecting them to all the other "isms" in our society...classism, sexism, heterosexism and so on. It's been profound seeing all they all operate under the same fear and how she puts things into perspective and lowers the threats, teaching us to see the big picture, it's been an amazing weekend. She hopefully will release it on DVD soon.

Before the workshop started, Luane and I got a call for a newborn still in the hospital. Luane and I have been licensed fost/adopt parents at the County for just over a year and this is the first time it looks like we'll actually get a kid. We're learning all about him...how he's in the NICU because he doesn't have the natural capacity to know how to suck. He was exposed to meth while in utero.

We've been trained and are prepared to take on this challenge and help him recover sooner than later. We're so excited, we can barely sleep...when that's what we need most of before the critter comes home and owns our nights.

Wish us luck....

Inauguration Day

info@godandgaysthemovie.com (Zernus Productions) — Wed, 21 Jan 2009 23:02:00 +0000

I had three favorite parts to the Inauguration today:

Rick Warren's prayer was milktoast, superficial and muted
Obama is now our president
Rev. Joseph Lowry was sincere, humorous (I was waiting for his rhyme to include "And the gay will have his day") and grounded

I watched the ceremony from my office, online. God bless the internet and the addition of streaming video. I had several friends in the million+ crowd and could feel their excitement as I cried while watching Obama swear in. I've never in my life known when the inauguration ceremony was, nevertheless watched it. This one, I couldn't wait for, it was like a concert I've had tickets to for eight years.

Inauguration Prayer - Bishop Gene Robinson

info@godandgaysthemovie.com (Zernus Productions) — Mon, 19 Jan 2009 03:48:00 +0000

The man whom conservatives call the reason for the current Episcopalian church split just because he's honest in who he is, speaks a prayer of unification and oneness for Obama, and all of us...

A Prayer for the Nation and Our Next President, Barack Obama

By The Rt. Rev. V. Gene Robinson, Episcopal Bishop of New Hampshire

Opening Inaugural Event

Lincoln Memorial, Washington, DC

January 18, 2009

Welcome to Washington! The fun is about to begin, but first, please join me in pausing for a moment, to ask God’s blessing upon our nation and our next president.

O God of our many understandings, we pray that you will…

Bless us with tears – for a world in which over a billion people exist on less than a dollar a day, where young women from many lands are beaten and raped for wanting an education, and thousands die daily from malnutrition, malaria, and AIDS.

Bless us with anger – at discrimination, at home and abroad, against refugees and immigrants, women, people of color, gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender people.

Bless us with discomfort – at the easy, simplistic “answers” we’ve preferred to hear from our politicians, instead of the truth, about ourselves and the world, which we need to face if we are going to rise to the challenges of the future.

Bless us with patience – and the knowledge that none of what ails us will be “fixed” anytime soon, and the understanding that our new president is a human being, not a messiah.

Bless us with humility – open to understanding that our own needs must always be balanced with those of the world.

Bless us with freedom from mere tolerance – replacing it with a genuine respect and warm embrace of our differences, and an understanding that in our diversity, we are stronger.

Bless us with compassion and generosity – remembering that every religion’s God judges us by the way we care for the most vulnerable in the human community, whether across town or across the world.

And God, we give you thanks for your child Barack, as he assumes the office of President of the United States.

Give him wisdom beyond his years, and inspire him with Lincoln’s reconciling leadership style, President Kennedy’s ability to enlist our best efforts, and Dr. King’s dream of a nation for ALL the people.

Give him a quiet heart, for our Ship of State needs a steady, calm captain in these times.

Give him stirring words, for we will need to be inspired and motivated to make the personal and common sacrifices necessary to facing the challenges ahead.

Make him color-blind, reminding him of his own words that under his leadership, there will be neither red nor blue states, but the United States.

Help him remember his own oppression as a minority, drawing on that experience of discrimination, that he might seek to change the lives of those who are still its victims.

Give him the strength to find family time and privacy, and help him remember that even though he is president, a father only gets one shot at his daughters’ childhoods.

And please, God, keep him safe. We know we ask too much of our presidents, and we’re asking FAR too much of this one. We know the risk he and his wife are taking for all of us, and we implore you, O good and great God, to keep him safe. Hold him in the palm of your hand – that he might do the work we have called him to do, that he might find joy in this impossible calling, and that in the end, he might lead us as a nation to a place of integrity, prosperity and peace.

AMEN.

Would You Still Hand Me the Ketchup if You Knew I Was Gay?

info@godandgaysthemovie.com (Zernus Productions) — Sun, 11 Jan 2009 23:53:00 +0000

Luane and I live, funny enough, in the most religiously conservative part of our county. Everyone's white, Christian, 2.5 kids, suburbans and soccer games. Churches thrive here. There's Christian camps in the woods. The local Peet's coffee even let one of its employees who's a congregant gather donations for her church with a purchase of a coffee. The No on 8 and Yes on 8 battle was quite fierce right in our own backyard.

There's a breakfast place Luane and I go to pretty often where the staff walk up, know what we want to eat and are always happy to see us, no matter how grungy we may look. They don't know our names or what we do for a living, although a month ago our photo was on the front page of the local paper. We look different in baseball caps.

One time we were there, the guy next to us heard me talk about how we were just interviewed for 90 minutes on KGO radio, the #1 radio station in the San Francisco Bay Area. He decided to let us know his opinion on how gay marriage is ridiculous, blah, blah, blah...Mind you, were sitting having buckwheat pancakes, catching up with Luane's mom for a leisure Saturday breakfast out. One would think that's a safe thing to do.

Alas, with our experiences on the road with the movie in some of the most conservative parts of the country, we have become alert at all times for conversation hijackers. Fortunately, we're grounded in who we are, and understand this is a guy wanting to be heard and helped. He's in essence asking someone to help free him from his own thought bondage. Our work is to be part of this experience for folks, so we handled it with compassion....and still it was unsettling for both him and us. But we both grew from it, I'm sure.

The last time we were in the cafe, I wanted to ask the table next to me if I could borrow their ketchup. They were a straight couple, older. I had hesitated in asking them. I just wanted to eat my eggs, not get into it again with someone, as I realized I had become more hyper-sensitive when I'm out about town in who I engage with in conversation since prop 8. Prop 8 had introduced this "neener-neener" mentality where the yes voters felt they had the right to say what they wanted about gay people and marriage. I'm sure many gay people had either gone back in the closet or something similar. Luane and I won't do that, but we're also careful of choosing our battles...we never start them mind you....we never start them.

So, I have eggs, I like a dash of ketchup, the straight couple next to us has the bottle. I have lots of choices, I choose the brave one and ask the couple for the ketchup. They smiled, were very pleasant and we had a nice and polite exchange. I even returned the bottle with my third thank you. Then, I started to wonder in my head...if they knew I was sitting here with my female partner, my spouse...if they knew I was gay, would they have treated me the same way?

I recognize straight people may be blown away that me, or any gay person would actually have questions like this, but I know I'm not alone. We're all a bit gun shy, just in different ways. I pray for the day that I won't have to be looking around our favorite breakfast place to make sure we're in a safe space. I want that for everywhere around the US, and the world. I hope you want that too.

Join the Impact

info@godandgaysthemovie.com (Zernus Productions) — Sat, 03 Jan 2009 22:40:00 +0000

Yes, we've been away for a while and a lot of life has happened...what an amazing end to 2008. The election, Our Family Matters conference in Nashville, Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas and a New Year.

Plus, we're still celebrating the exciting news that the DVD is finally in wide release, available everywhere DVDs are sold and rented. This one includes a never-before-released audio commentary with Luane and I...which is funny and packed with behind-the-scenes info on how we made the movie. I had a cold and in the spirit of "keeping it real" we didn't re-record once I was well; we like the raw, in the moment feel like you see throughout the documentary.

Some people have wondered how life was like for us during and since prop 8 and thank you for your kind notes and prayers...for they are for all of us as discrimination rears its ugly head just as it has done once religion gets involved in issuing rights to minorities. All good is coming from this though...if you've not heard of the online grass roots group JoinTheImpact.com, check them out and get involved. Often people are left feeling helpless as the Goliaths seem too big to do anything about...alas, the bigger they are, the harder they fall...just look at a history book that hopefully is accurately written.

Prop 8 is asking for us to have conversations, to deal with social equality once and for all. This is our chance to stop the abusive pattern of demonizing a segment of society and continuing the craziness of "us vs. them". It's never worked, it won't, we need to accept we are all one and get over the spiritual immaturity to believe anyone is better than anyone else. So this is my wish for 2009. We're all one, so let's start acting like it. Enjoy the freedom that it invites, the peace, the diplomacy. Have fun today.

Obama, Warren and Lowry

info@godandgaysthemovie.com (Zernus Productions) — Thu, 04 Dec 2008 07:51:00 +0000

What are we to think or believe about Obama's action around inviting Pastor Rick Warren from Saddleback church in Southern California to speak at his inauguration? Some feel slighted, some are confused, some are downright pissed. There's a lot of hurt already from prop 8 and now one of the major funders and champions gets a worldwide stage next to our next president. We thought we voted discriminatory and arrogant conciousness out of the White House in November. But this is victim-speak.

I get why he did it, and it still wasn't the best move. With a country packed with pastors of influence, why choose one who openly chooses to go against the unconditional love and respect for all God's creation Jesus teaches?

Feels like a big ouch...and not just from people in the gay community. There are many stunned straight people as well. It was an unneccessary move, with so many other better choices.

He did get it right with choosing Rev. Dr. Joseph Lowry, who ran with MLK and is very open in supporting the gay community, to also speak at the inauguration. I wish Lowry got all the attention, he's the one that deserves it. I praise Obama for choosing him, he has the right message of oneness, reconciliation and peace. Anything outside of that doesn't deserve a pulpit, it's not worth our time.

Rick Warren has made oodles of money from his churches and book sales. I've had friends from Soulforce scheduled for months to have a lunch with him only to arrive to an awkward hug and his rapid disappearance.

I encourage you to not fall for the Warren hype, focus on Lowry, his message ought to get our attention and celebration. The Rick Warrens of the world only survive when there's an audience that'll listen. The more we don't listen to the rhetoric, the faster it'll go away and the more space is made for the Lowry's of our one world.

Marriage is a Basic Human Right

info@godandgaysthemovie.com (Zernus Productions) — Sat, 18 Oct 2008 19:53:00 +0000

With the election around the corner and people buzzing about mailing in their ballots to make sure they vote (and the extra postage it takes), it's been a fascinating ride watching people for me. Outside my door near the parking lot is a sign telling people to vote for a proposition that would take away my right to be married to the person I love. It's here, in my face. When I see it, my stomach is quesy because it's a child crying for help, it reminds me of the pervasive fear in our society. Prop 8 is a projection of desperate control by actually changing the constitution to make discrimination legal. What year is it? What state is this? California and America is better than that.

Rev. Deborah has a video breaking down what Prop 8 is about, check it out:

Although on the surface Prop 8 in California is saying to vote for it to "save marriage". Just like any other marketing term, you say it often enough and people will start repeating it and believe it actually means something. With just a brief amount of thought, one would recognize the proposition and its stance has nothing to do with marriage, saving it or not. There's already studies saying the divorce rate will drop with same-gender couples marrying...because people will actually marry who they genuinely love rather than who they think they are supposed to marry.

We see No on 8 signs around town too, many of them vandalized. I think to sum up the tension that exists on this topic around marriage equality is with the no on 8 sign torn right where it says "equality for all". The tear separates "equality" from "for all".

Anger manifested. Even McCain's current campaign strategy is built on deflection and anger..."it's the other guy's fault", "look what he's doing and not doing". It's all distraction, no ownership or integrity behind it. That same mindset of fear trickles down to the little No on 8 sign with torn equality.

How did we get here? When did our hearts get so suffocated as to be so desperate to make discrimination against a segment of society legal? When did it become okay to vote on someone else's relationship? What if your relationship was up for a popular vote right now...every day someone is marking their ballot and deciding the validity of your relationship...they don't know you, and they don't care to.

No, really...take a second and feel what that would be like for you. Even when Prop 8 is defeated, I drive out of this state and I'm no longer married. Can you just imagine what that feels like? On my federal taxes I have to lie under penalty of perjury and state I'm single...and sign my name to it. What would that feel like to you?

Below the drama and victimization, this proposition is about changing the state constitution. The California Supreme Court (which is a Republican majority) recognized that it was unlawful to not allow committed same-gender couples to marry, they did not "give" us the right, it was there all along. Equality is built into the constitution. It's been a given since the beginning. The pilgrims left England so they could create equality and not suffer persecution. So we're now being asked to reverse the very premise the country has been built on? For what? People loving each other?

An axe murderer on death row retains the right to be married...so regardless of what you feel about people's behavior, marriage is a basic human right. It's incredibly dangerous to allow a group of people motivated by fear to start picking and choosing which segment of society gets to be equal and who doesn't. Who's next? Muslims? Immigrants? Whoever the threat du jour is.

California has been here before with interracial marriage in the late 1940s. The same argument was used, the same fear tactics and here we are again. The world didn't explode when an African-American fell in love with a Latino-American person. The world still won't explode when same-gender people fall in love. Plus, it's always been a part of the human race, it's not like being gay started a few years ago.

Please understand what trying to control other people's behavior creates. The division, not only as a society but also with people feeling the division internally. Whenever we feel confusion, we must just seek peace. Our inner guidance will step up if we allow it to.

I don't tend to touch anything that is fear-based...my criteria are love-based: are people treating other people equally, is this proposition fair, is it expanding rights allowing people to become more of who they are, is it freeing. If it feels like control, fear, anger...I want nothing to do with it.

And my inner Anne Frank believes people will do the right thing. I can't imagine how and why I'd be qualified to vote on someone else's life and especially their love. It's absurd that this is even happening, it's desperate to take control when it would nothing of the sort. Committed same-gender people will still be married and they will continue to marry, nothing would change...except greater alienation, which is exactly the opposite of what we need as a society right now. We have to be there for each other at a time like this. We have to stand up for each other. We have to protect the constiution as it was written to treat all people equally. Please vote no on prop 8.

God and Gays DVD Release November 11th

info@godandgaysthemovie.com (Zernus Productions) — Wed, 15 Oct 2008 21:02:00 +0000

We're thrilled to announce that God and Gays: Bridging the Gap is being re-released on DVD Tuesday, November 11th! So, pre-order it from Amazon, Save it in your Netflix queue, tell a friend...think of the holidays and who could use a movie to remind them of just how loved they are, just as they are...thank you for supporting us all this time. Enjoy the movie!

God and Gays Shows in Los Angeles Oct 23-26

info@godandgaysthemovie.com (Zernus Productions) — Wed, 15 Oct 2008 20:59:00 +0000

We've heard from our film distributor that God and Gays: Bridging the Gap will show for one week at the Los Angeles Laemle Grand. Spread the news, invite friends and enjoy the movie!!

Ray Boltz Headlines Our Family Matters

info@godandgaysthemovie.com (Zernus Productions) — Thu, 02 Oct 2008 20:52:00 +0000

This year's conference is really shaping up...I can't believe the enormous support we're getting from people who want to volunteer, attend and participate. People have been waiting for someone to do something like this and now that someone has, all kinds of energy is around it.

And the timing couldn't be better. Recently, Ray Boltz, the widely-successful contemporary Christian music artist, 3-time Dove Award winner with his biggest hit, "Thank You"...came out. He's gone public and has a whole new CD he's working on.

Our Family Matters is a perfect match for Ray Boltz and he'll be headlining our celebration concert on Saturday night, Oct 25th. With Valerie Joi Fiddmont and Holy Trinity Community Church also performing...let's just say you have to be there to see the grand finale we have planned.

Join us in Nashville Oct 22-25 for Our Family Matters. Come and see Ray Boltz, Dr. Jack Rogers and Rev. Deobrah Johnson in person. There's nothing else like it.

Luane and I Got Married

info@godandgaysthemovie.com (Zernus Productions) — Wed, 01 Oct 2008 20:35:00 +0000

For our 4-year wedding anniversary, we decided to get married again! This time, legally. We did just the opposite of our first wedding and had a very intimate ceremony officiated by Rev. Deborah L. Johnson of Inner Light Ministries. We held a sunrise ceremony on a beautiful park-like setting overlooking the Pacific Ocean, surrounded by trees.

I cried, no surprise there. I really lost it when Rev. Deborah was standing very close to me and said "lawfully". My mom said she didn't even think of the importance of that word until she heard it and saw my reaction. My mom even said she thought of other parents who've shunned their kids for "being gay" and how much they would miss experiencing with their kids. She teared up thinking all she would have missed. She's my best friend and I'm glad she's always chosen love when it comes to hard stuff.

The key thing was this felt different. Not different in my love or my promise to Luane and our partnership, but...different. It meant no one could say to me, "your relationship isn't the same as mine" even though I've never believed it anyway. With straight people surrounding us, going into the county building and getting our license....it felt very real. I don't expect you to understand, but if you've ever just believed in yourself and who you are when no one else did, you can relate. Just by sticking to your commitment and clarity of who you are, you just waited for the others to catch up. When they did, it felt...different...and maybe even surreal. That's what it's like.

I'm behind on getting the photos up because of all the planning work around the conference, but I will get them up eventually. Thank you for all your emails of well-wishing for our special day!

Hallmark Unveils Gay Wedding Cards

info@godandgaysthemovie.com (Zernus Productions) — Tue, 26 Aug 2008 18:06:00 +0000

I got this forwarded from RetailWire today....

Article Preview:

Two months after California sanctioned same-sex marriages, Hallmark announced plans to introduce same-sex wedding cards. Making no direct mention of same-sex unions, the cards feature two tuxedos, overlapping hearts or intertwined flowers, with neutral best wishes inside. One says: "Two hearts. One promise." What do you think of the market opportunity for same-sex wedding cards? How big a backlash, if any, do you expect Hallmark will receive for introducing the cards?

*************

One topic that is often talked about in the gay community is the challenge of walking into a Longs to get your partner a birthday or anniversary card and none are really accurate. For Luane, I've been settling for the To My Wife cards, but we're among the camp who aren't into the wife title. Sometimes I'll scratch out the Wife part and put Partner. Many of our straight friends aren't into 'wife or husband' as well, so it's not just the gay community looking for cards to reflect current relationships. Partner is much more widely used, gay or straight, in relationships. Partner feels more equal, more deliberate, more committed for the right reason.

Yes, there's been independent artists and stores creating same-gender (same-sex is also not an accurate statement) cards for years. And, there's been occasions when I don't have the time to order cards on line or go to San Francisco to find a store that might have the tone and words I want to say in a beautifully decorated card to express my love, so I run to the local Walgreens. Or, I make my own and bypass the whole inaccurate card purchase.

It's been a joke, it's been a frustration, now it seems it'll finally be a thing of the past. We'll say, "remember when there was only husband and wife cards? As if those titles were the only choices to box in what we called our partners...and ourselves?"

Thankfully, Hallmark is joining the long list of companies who get that gay relationships are still relationships, and we too deserve an appropriately loving and sentimental wedding card for our partner. It's all the same. Love is love. I'm looking forward to the day I can get Luane a Valentine's card and not have to scratch off the Wife.

Vow to Vote No on 8 in November

info@godandgaysthemovie.com (Zernus Productions) — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 18:50:00 +0000

There's a large coalition of churches, resource centers, politicians, companies, universities and community members unified to defeat prop 8 in November. To learn more, support the defeat which will allow Luane and I to be legally married, go to: www.noonprop8.com for more information. You can donate no matter where you live.

For Luane and my (second) wedding at the end of September, we're asking people to give gifts not to us, but to the campaign. We do this not just for ourselves, but for the rest of the country. We see people coming from all over the country to marry here in California, regardless of their state recognizing the marriage or not. It's important to the couple, to make that public step, no different than what it means to a straight couple in making the commitment.

Thanks for your support, we're continuing to do what we can to help people realize that along the same lines of freedom of religion, freedom of race, there's freedom of orientation. It's a basic freedom.

I've been told by countless moms who at first had the "ick" factor in their heads. Then they recognized how they've been teaching their children to appreciate the differently skinned kid in their class, the different religion practiced by their family friends, the different body sizes kids come in...and yet to be inconsistent in appreciating the diversity of who people love.

So, the "aha" moments are happening...people are getting we're all the same on the inside and just expressing ourselves uniquely on the outside. Part of God's tapestry, that's all it is.

The first federally recognized same-sex marriage will happen on the Coquille reservation

info@godandgaysthemovie.com (Zernus Productions) — Wed, 20 Aug 2008 19:41:00 +0000

This is fascinating to me...Native American reservations are "federal" land and a committed lesbian couple will soon be married on their reservation, thus the marriage federally recognized? As horrific as the Native Americans have been treated since, well, forever, by governments, wouldn't it be nice to have this moment in history for them?

I'm also excited about this for two other reasons...I have Muskogee blood in me, from Oklahoma. My ancestry is a part of the Creek tribe and the Turtle clan. We were on the Trail of Tears from the Carolinas and Florida area. We still have heirlooms carried along the Trail within our family. It's a history that is very real to me. When I saw the 30 Days episode this summer where Morgan Spurlock lived on a reservation for a month, I was so moved...it took me back to my childhood and what family was like on the Native American side.

My grandma, at a family reunion, gave us all Native American names. Her name was Owl. She called me Gazelle. Which, at first I was concerned...did she see me as someone who ran away as a defense? I'm clearly not doing that lately if so....then, I learned it was due to my very long legs and my athleticism. So I keep exercise up in my life, gotta keep that girlish Gazelle figure.

The other relevance is I grew up in Oregon. Most of my life has been in California, however I still consider my roots as an Oregonian. For those Oregonians out there, your first question is if my family is Duck or Beaver, and we're Duck even though I never attended Univ. of Oregon.

For this monumental event in LGBT history to collide with my ancestral makeup, makes me feel even more proud. The Natives are first in something again. And good for Oregon to be the state to have it happen.

The Art of Words - No on 8 Description Upheld

info@godandgaysthemovie.com (Zernus Productions) — Fri, 08 Aug 2008 20:15:00 +0000

In California, same gender committed couples are getting legally married. We hear of hundreds of couples coming from out of state, as far as from Tennessee and beyond to have the dignifying experience of respect for their relationship even if their own state won't recognize its legitimacy. It's an amazing time and I'm proud to be in the front row watching the authentic happiness and tears of joy on these couples' and families' faces.

Recently, the Secretary of State released the description for the ballot measure that's made its way to the CA November ballot which would actually amend the state constitution to disallow gays and lesbians to marry legally. This is the wording:

Proposition 8
ELIMINATES RIGHT OF SAME-SEX COUPLES TO MARRY.
INITIATIVE CONSTITUTIONAL AMENDMENT

Changes California Constitution to eliminate right of same-sex couples to marry. Provides that only a marriage between a man and a woman is valid or recognized in California.

Fiscal Impact: Over the next few years, potential revenue loss, mainly sales taxes, totaling in the several tens of millions of dollars, to state and local governments. In the long run, likely little fiscal impact to state and local governments.

The folks being paid from mostly out of state organizations who got the signatures for the measure freaked and sued (again) to get the wording softened. They wanted it to be more like defining marriage as one man and one woman. This is the art of words...making something distasteful taste good.

The announcement was made this morning on the suit:

According to Mike Swift at the Mercury News:
" A Superior Court judge this morning rejected a suit filed by Prop. 8 proponents against the ballot title proposed by Attorney General Jerry Brown. Judge Timothy M. Frawley said Brown's language was neither false nor misleading, handing a victory to gay rights supporters who want a clear statement of what a constitutional ban would mean for gay couples who have married in California this year."

So, it's inevitable for the people of California, who don't want to really treat people differently, who are raising their families to accept those of different faiths, cultures, backgrounds and color of skin will simply add orientation to the list of basic fairness.

Luane and I are making our wedding plans...we're getting married (again) in September. I'll marry her as many times as it takes to stick. I hope you'll join the millions of others across the country to get educated on this proposition.

Have you seen Swing Vote yet? It's about knowing what you stand for and putting that education into play at the polls. You can help others get educated as well. You're invited to support the No on 8 Equality for All folks at: http://noonprop8.com

Shooting in Knoxville, TN

info@godandgaysthemovie.com (Zernus Productions) — Mon, 04 Aug 2008 23:37:00 +0000

By now, you may have heard of the sad and traumatic shooting that happened during a Sunday service at a church in Knoxville, TN which resulted in 2 deaths and 4 people in critical care. The church was Unitarian Universalist and targeted by the gunman because he believed he could find "liberals and gays" there to blame for his current state of life's misfortune.

Yes, the church was well known in the area as being open and affirming, which means it is public in its welcome for any who want to come with deliberate outreach to gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender folks. It's well documented that churches who become open and affirming, actually grow in general, as many straight folks return to attend a church who genuinely welcomes everybody.

Learn more about the shooting: http://www.knoxnews.com/news/news/local/church-shooting/

For the Knoxville tragedy, my and Luane's heart go out to the church attendees, their families and the leadership of the church. It also goes out to the man who felt the best way to handle his anger and frustration with his life was to externalize his pain and force others to feel the wounds he feels. The whole situation is sad...projecting blame on strangers for one's unhappiness...whether through the violent use of a gun or of the tongue. They are linked and do tremendous damage and even death...physically, spiritually and emotionally.

With Our Family Matters coming to Nashville, TN in October, we intend to help the state of Tennessee heal from this tragedy by offering a safe place for people to come and get their questions answered, to provide support for those who seek solace, to provide community for those who otherwise feel isolation.

Come together, help Tennessee heal and join us, no matter where you live. For more information and registration: http://www.ourfamilymatters.org

Ellen DeGeneres Gets Engaged...and So Do We.

info@godandgaysthemovie.com (Zernus Productions) — Mon, 19 May 2008 23:46:00 +0000

There's been nationwide hoopla over the California Supreme Court favoring the decision to not allow discrimination of sexual orientation to be used in legal marriages. In my world, everyone is talking about it. The celebration, the tears of joy, more heads held up high, more kids finally feeling their same-sex parents are getting the credit for their relationship they so very much deserve. It's been incredible.

I was told of a minister I know who at an early age really believed that with this culture, there'd never be an African-American president nor marriage equality in her lifetime. So you can imagine what this year has been like for her...

I truly believe in people, it's my inner Anne Frank. I do have faith that people do want to do the right things, be loving and understanding as they seek that for themselves as well. I'm proud of California.

Many people have asked if Luane and I are going to get (officially) married now that we actually can legally. So, just to let you know, yes, of course we are. We already are married anyway, all the hard work of the relationship, the huge commitment ceremony we had in 2004...all that's done. Getting a marriage license is the easy part. We'll probably do it in a private setting since that's Luane's preference (mine was the big party...we complement each other well).

The trippy part of all this is marriages will begin to be legal on June 16th which is one day after Luane's birthday and the anniversary of my middle sister's death. That date means a lot to me and now it means even more.

The Human Rights Campaign is circulating a petition for Million for Marriage. If you'd like to sign it and be a part of the growing number of people coming out of the woodwork to support those of us in long-term, committed relationships towards marriage, please go to:
http://www.hrcactioncenter.org/campaign/millionformarriageac. There will be a reserved place for you at the banquet table in heaven. Thank you for standing for equality of all people, just as Jesus did.

Some of you may have heard or seen Ellen DeGeneres make the big announcement on her show last Friday. My favorite part of this is the audience reaction which causes Ellen to get choked up and Portia dizzy with laughter. It's a beautiful scene...enjoy.

So, honey, how does it feel to be equal?

info@godandgaysthemovie.com (Zernus Productions) — Thu, 15 May 2008 22:58:00 +0000

Today the California Supreme Court voted in favor of allowing gay and lesbian people to marry; the mostly Republican court voted for marriage equality. Even the Governor is supportive of the ruling and says he will not support a state constitutional amendment if it comes to that in November.

I've lived to see it and feel it.

When my email was barraged by well wishers, congratulations, news bulletins and impromptu party invites to celebrate tonight when the announcement was made, I just smiled and said thank you. I then turned to Luane and said, "so honey, how does it feel to be equal?" It was actually kind of a joke because we've always felt equal. No one can "make" us feel unequal anyway. It's just an awesome feeling that others are finally getting it too.

What's so wonderful about this announcement is that our government, at least in California, is finally catching up. It's finally recognizing people as people. It's finally opening its heart and teaching those who have yet to catch up to what equality looks like legally and how the world will in fact not come to an end.

There will be no world destruction, nothing negative will happen except hopefully it'll encourage people who've been internally homophobic towards themselves or lying to themselves and those around them to be open, honest and authentic. And still, I feel that's hugely positive, even if painful in the short term. I've been through it, I know the peace that comes with reconciliation of sexuality and spirituality.

The courts setting this example can only protect kids like Lawrence King, can only increase the number of marriages between people who do actually love each other - thereby reducing the number of marriages between people where one or both are doing it out of duty and self-oppression, denying their same sex attraction and then dragging their partner and eventual kids into their baggage. As Jason Stuart says at the end of our movie, "C'mon straight people, if you let us marry each other, we'll stop marrying you."

Over the years I've been quasi keeping score of who will be last institutionally to be open and affirming and it's been neck and neck with churches and governments. With the United Methodists at the end of April still not living up to their own slogan as a denomination, "Open Hearts, Open Minds" and the California Supreme Court filled mostly of Republicans decision, gotta give major points to government in this round. Churches are falling behind, but they always have a chance to gain footage again, especially with two Democratic candidates both deflecting and saying "it's up to the states" and a Republican candidate just flat out against marriage equality.

Even with the UMC ruling, there are many many UMC churches making their own statements to their local community. In Hoquaim, WA last Saturday night, Darlene Bogle, Roby Sapp and Dotti Berry showed our movie and led a fantastic discussion afterwards to a filled room. The host of the screening was the local UMC. People, when given the chance, will authentically open their hearts and open their minds.

In the words of Rev. Deborah Johnson, "you can't stop an idea, who's time has come."

Thank you, California. Maybe I'll not have to lie on my tax forms anymore and check the box saying Single...thank you for the opportunity to be more of myself.

More info: Yahoo News

May Day: Today's National Day of Prayer

info@godandgaysthemovie.com (Zernus Productions) — Thu, 01 May 2008 22:07:00 +0000

It's May Day, for several reasons.

1) It's May 1st, so...it's also the first Thursday of the month which means we have our free, live teleconference call tonight with all of you who have signed up on our email list.
2) It's National Day of Prayer and
3) The United Methodist General Conference just voted to keep in language excluding GLBT members and leaders as they are deemed "incompatible with Christian teachings"...at least for another four years until they vote again. They'll one day be embarrassed by that decision like churches have been in using the Bible to support slavery and other oppressions through history. There where a host of contradictory votes, see this press release for more info.

Like you, I get sent all kinds of e-newsletters, email blasts, article links and I'm grateful people help us keep in the loop on the temperature of our United States...I'm very grateful actually. I then get to experience what's most important to people.

As much as the articles, links to videos, etc we receive to be a bummer to read like #3 above, it's no longer in my nature to really give it a lot of attention and energy. I do occasionally find myself impatient however.

I know in my soul the UMC Conference and others who are like-minded are on a losing side. It's just a matter of time. There's no winning here in excluding people. It never works. No discrimination, no exclusion, no us vs. them, no paradigm of "you must change or go away so I'm comfortable" has ever lasted, it's always been defeated once people start choosing love rather than fear. And this will too. This is what I pray for on this National Day of Prayer. For all of us to be enlightened and empowered to become more of who we are and meant to be on how God made us to be.

And for patience.

With California and other states possibly again having to deal with annoying ballot measures on banning gay marriage - an argument and use of tax dollars that even Republican Governor Schwarzenegger calls "a waste of time", the race is neck and neck of which behemoth will come in last: the government or the church in the obvious "letting its citizens be themselves without the intervention of a mis-interpreted Bible". Separation of church and state, right?

So, all this to say I invite you to join us on our call tonight with Ann Craig from GLAAD as we talk about the media representation of the gay community and how it affects public opinion. I spent 8 years as a media management, theorist and production instructor at a college in California so I'm extra thrilled to have this conversation.

Remember, it's the first Thursday of the month so that means it's God, Gays & You Live Interview Series time. Hope you can join us and if not live, then check out the recording tomorrow at: www.godandgaysthemovie.com/archive.