GOD IS GAY

2012-01-06T04:02:00.000-08:00

To Kurt

Destiny is a mockery
When you play the dice with me
Though of making you to laugh
End up crying bluff

These words are not mine
So we cant be partners in crime
Ever since I lost myself
I have been using your help

Though about planting a seed
Fighting hard to buy a creed
Cut my self scratching as I did
Fuel your ego to feed

Myself alone and disarmed
Placed myself in edge to be harmed
There I found my solace
While I saw him tying his lace

Emptiness is fulfilling me
Staging my sadness as glee
Waving of waiting for
Too close all the door

And then I dont regret a thing
While I see your play and sing

Roby

Black Pegasus from my Dreams

2011-12-21T01:54:00.000-08:00

To Kurt
A white walled room, with a dais in the center stage
The sands of time were lost somewhere in the haze
And he was singing among the gods, with a guitar around his neck
And they didn’t mind him sing, said he was a fake

Some how I was looking for my brother, when I noticed him
Felt like an old man trying to dust his sin
Though in life I have seen his picture, though him to be thin
And the angles went off to their duties carrying proudly their angelic fin

He kept singing for all that mattered to him
Enthralling me to stay back as long as he sing
O how it feels to be mortals standing among the gods
Sadly we both ignored the gods and held on to each other

He played for me and me alone
Didn’t care if any one frown
I stood there for him and him alone
For his song made its way in my bone

The god took an insult when we mortals didn’t pay them heed
Said we are sinners and must be paid for our greed
All we did was entertain each other as long as we stood
But the angles came up to force us apart and sniggered under their hood

Then there was a trumpet sound announcing our demise
The angles will race in mighty Pegasus to show us their might
One mortal who is greater of we two will be challenged in the race
The idea was nothing much, but just to blacken our face

The angles sat upto the mightiest white Pegasus back
While he was given small and weak Pegasus which was black
And there the bugle range again, sounding the beginning
Though we both knew that the race won’t be clean

As they rode to glory, I found him trail behind
As if he was tired of all the toils of this previous life
Yet there he was riding behind every one
And it was just like that, we both were not having any fun

Well the human soul is mighty thing
The angles didn’t plan their bargain
He was born to win
And so his Pegasus suddenly took up wing

Ohh how lovely it seems when we mortal beat angles in their own race
I wonder perhaps that why they cover their hooded face
Yet one is foolish to underestimate the angles grace
One took out a crossbow to end the embarrassing case

I saw the bolts strike the black Pegasus down
He was winning, but now they won’t let him have the crown
I followed him with his fall
But the fall from the heave its way too tall

I knew where to find him again
Though I was not very certain
The doubt and fear in me would hold me back
But the curiosity make be back track

There I was again in a white walled room
Though none of us were supposed to be there so soon
The fire in the fire place was in full bloom
5 bloated figured stood there as if facing their doom

I tried frantically to look for him
I knew in my heart, that what happened was an unforgiving sin
I searched the bloated green face of theirs looking for my kin
Asking my self what I can do to find him

Then I look at the 5th one staring at me
The eyes were asking me to properly see
I didn’t knew now what to do, now once I have found him
I am too small to undo the sin

The five stood back looking through me
As they were looking through my soul to eternity
I was looking for one and still I wonder
The other four were brothers and sister who were waiting forever

They came time and again to amuse our desire
Yet no one understood their passionate burning fire
Though the cause was not too much dire
They would bribe the angle and get the black Pegasus on hire

Roby

The fallacy of We

2011-10-23T11:38:00.000-07:00

To Kurt

Perceptions of reality

Enemies of prosperity

Don’t ask me to live for thee

Don’t want you to live for me

Slimy altruist holding a gun

They slither like mucus while having fun

The cross section was never dissected

Bitter soft money is termed as pun

The leeches suck your blood and feast on u r heart

While your mind is in display in wal mart

Ask them where would they be without you

They know it and hence would ask to stand in a queue

Emotions and roses up for sale

On pretty baby, from where did you hale

Antique 2^nd hand beats the price

Originality is based on the toss of dice

- Roby

Wake up

2011-08-07T13:50:00.001-07:00

To Kurt
Life is a prison of myriad dreams
Wake up if yu will to hear the screams
Another life , another folly
Come on girl lets play jolly

Big daddy’s pulling the string
But the bird’s struggling with a broken wing
Acrid smoke killed the entire nightingale in B-wing
Now there s no one left to sing

The smoking gun is lying empty
Some one said the head wound wasn’t that deadly
It is said that she went out to find God in the night
While he sat behind, trying to heal his malignant blight

And then you hear bomb dropping
Liquid gold is the new thing in
So then there was a blood baths
But we sat back with a cola and a hat

Placed with a choice or an option
Doped away to elation
Floated in the clouds with the archangels
Came down to found everyone in bangles

And then came the macho bro of mine
And she said oh please don’t whine
Loaded with loads of steroid and attitude
Yet somehow their head was just too crude

Ask a question to answer my desire
Would you breed or would you hire
Whether passion is similar to fire
Or are the needs just too much dire?
Roby

The Gambler

2011-05-22T11:39:00.001-07:00

To Kurt
A sun tanned bloke state in the corner
Had nothing except his soul to barter
For him the flavor was always bitter
Yet he waited with dice to gamble his honor

Sweet sister cant see your face
Not sure whether its shame or disgrace
The holy father forgot to bless
As he sat in the corner of this place

Time is a mighty device
Never fails to wash your vice
Yet he tried to hold on to the slipping sand
With all the might offered by his hand

Rolling dice is a tricky subject
Can ‘t hold luck by a thread
He scratched his itch to fell himself
In a grand scheme to make amend

Laid eyes in the leprechaun’s treasure
Forgot to take the appropriate measure
Still he placed his bet in the table
There is nothing better than an all in
Roby

2011-02-20T23:07:00.000-08:00

______________Blank_________________

TO KURT
@#$))@$
WE R THE MOST INTELLECTUAL SELF
$%#%#$%
SOMEHOW I AM LYING TO MYSELF
%^$^)@!
THE MOST FUNNY ASPECT IS
)#$(@%^
I KNOW YOU ALL ARE DOING THE SAME AS ME
^(*@#$)@$
THE BITCH IS HUNGRY FOR MORE
(#@*$@#
REMINDS ME TO INCREASE MY LORE
($#%**#
THE SIN IS A SINNER S BREAD
!#*$#%^
AND HOW THE GOD TORMENT OUR HEAD
($%#$%*
THE SUNNY SKY IS GOOD TO LOOK AT
($#%#$%
TOO MUCH SUN FOR U R NAKED EYES IS BAD
($#%**@
THE MAKER MADE A FAULTY BALANCE
@#$@$%
HENCE WE RECORD ALWAYS HER ABSENCE
*@#$&&
THE STARRY NIGHT IS NEVER TOO BRIGHT
@#*@#$(
THE DEVIL IS ALWAYS RIGHT
*!)(@#$(
AND WHEN THE TIME IS RIPE
(#$%*##
THEY WANT US ALL TO FIGHT
(*@#$$%
TALKS ABOUT GLORY AND HONOR
#$**#$%
MAKE ME COMPARE IT WITH OTHER COMMODITIES AND FODDER
$%(^$%^$%^%$^**@#$()!(@#****#%#$%#))))*(!@$#%$%^^%((*@$#@$#@#$@($*2

ROBY
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++XXX++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
=================================================================

The Chocolate

2011-02-18T02:34:00.000-08:00

Ashim ran over to bring in the cloths from the shop. As he was busy watching the kites fly and fight over the dominance in the sky, he just lost his track of time. Then suddenly it rained. He hated when it rained. Rain always brought him back from his high flying dreams to the reality of the earth.
He realized that he needed to bring his sahib's cloths which he had given to laundry. He didn't mind doing this but he was hugely attracted to the kites, the birds, the other kids playing football etc. So he ran and waited in the shop till the rain stopped.
His mother died while giving birth to him and his dad was in the joint for killing a shopkeeper over a fight. He didn’t bother much about it because he knew that he had a dream and no matter how hard his days were he always had the nights to his name where he was a high flyer in his dreams.
His sahb was a good man with bad manners. Sabh was some Government officer and he used to work in their home for five hundred rupees a month and two square meals. Sabhs son Mayak was ok. At least he would play with him, let him fly kites and ask him to do the balling. But this gratitude came at a cost. Ashim had to take the blame of all the mess that Mayank made. Often it has been that Ashim has been manhadled by Shab but he didn't mind that.
He knew he was giving a small price for the only fun he had in life.
As Ashim was stepping out of the house he was given twenty rupees by Mayank to buy him Chocolates. Ashim has been instructed that he should not tell shab about this and once he is back he must give the chocolate directly to Mayank.
Ashim knew that Shab hardly notices much and whenever he brings in the laundry ironed from the shop he was asked to put it in the table. Ashim came home to find the family waiting for him.
Instantly he knew that there has been problem and he was into trouble.
As soon as he entered he was bombarded with questions. He was searched for and then shab found the chocolates in his pockets. When asked from where he got the money Ashim didn't have any answer. He has been in this situation earlier and he knew that by keeping mum he will end up with few slaps and bruses from his sahib and at the end everything will be forgotten. But somehow deep in his heart a fear gripped him. He understood this time things weren’t simple. It was not about breaking a flower vase, or a window glass. Shab was constantly asking him from where he has got the money to buy the stuff. Then so it happened that few days later he was thrown out of the house to fend for himself and even that day it was raining.
Today as Ashim sat on his office watching the raindrops wondering why it does always comes back to him on a rainy day. In front of him was the vigilance report on the corruption cases and the prime accused on the same was Mayank Banerjee. As destiny had it the tables has tuned. Ashim was the General Manager of a ruputed Bank and Mayank was a branch manager. Mayank's father was suffering from terminal cancer. Mayank lost his wife 3 months from the date in a Car crash and was the sole bread earner for his two kids and his ailing father. The only thing that went in Ashim's mind was what to do. His rage for this family was too much and yet he found himself in a position that the only feeling that came to him was pity. Pity for the family.
Ashim knew what he had to do. He typed his resignation letter and stated that Mayank has been acting as per the directions of him and submitted that down the line Ashim has been the main actor in the corruption that has been taking place in Mayanks Branch.
He then wrote a letter to Mayank's dad......

Respected Shab
I don’t know if you remember me but I am the small 6 year old kid who used to work in your home. I was thrown away from your place by you because you were under an impression that I was stealing your money.
Now its been 38 years and somehow I found myself in a very complicated position. Your son, Mayank has been found as the responsible person for various fraud and corruption charges and I am the one who have to take the decision. I contemplated a lot and tried to comprehend what my act should be. One small itch of my pen and I knew that Mayank would be turned out of this office in the same manner you turned me out of your house. Sadly I had time to again regain myself. I had my whole life at that point of time. But I think Mayank doesn’t have the same opportunity like that of mine. So Shab at the end, the boy who used to do the chores of your household is doing what he has done best in his life i.e. take the blame for your son's act.
I don’t want to make any point here except for the fact that how wrong people can be while making a judgment and even while making a judgment they must at least think of giving a second chance. I am thankful that you didn’t give me a second chance else I would have been a household servant for the rest of my life but somehow I felt that I have to give Mayank another chance. Anyway its too late for him.
Warm Regards
Ashim

The End of a Rainbow

2011-02-17T11:56:00.000-08:00

He was worried because it was unnatural for him to be worried. This has never happened to him. From his very young age till today he had lead a carefree life. Never wondered about silly questions like “what if" and "why". He found himself sweating. The beads of sweat in his forehead made him realize of an unknown feeling. A feeling which can be traced back to the pre historic age. A feeling which he cannot apprehend and neither can describe.
Where did it went wrong? That was a constant sentence and an apprehension that crossed his mind over and over again.
Though he was heavily sedated with alcohol and some heavy dose of marijuana, his clarity was not infected by this. He was wondering about his life and the meaning of the same. Some how he was not able to comprehend its purpose and neither can define the path he has followed. He stopped and wondered if he has followed any path or was he just wondering in a dark forest with no visible path.
Answers are not easy to find, especially in a day. Somehow he knew that all through his 25 years of life he has been living a life of a parasite. Maybe looking for sympathy or maybe looking for empathy. He was wondering why he needed that. Was he not good enough. He has always been good enough. But then he realized he has been lost for a long time. His childhood was married with the constant issues related to his dad and his mother. Somehow he blamed his mother for the same. Somehow he blamed his mother for every thing including his dads untimely death. Reason for the same is still not comprehendible by him. He remembered the time he used to spend time with his brothers and sisters. When he looks back it seems everyone was just playing the role of being his brother or sister and no one really cared about him. As if the stage was set for a big drama and he was just another side kick actor in the same. Somehow he never wanted that. He always wanted the lead role even though he believed that drama's were a waste of time and nothing in a drama is real.
His role as the side kick was also negative. He was mainly portrait as a erratic guy who was more or less as a villan who has scraped of the peace of mind of all his family and friends. He was sick of playing the bad guy. He wanted a release from the harsh reality and went for the age old drugs and alcohol for escapism. It was good in the beginning but then somehow he was hooked on to it. As if he just can’t let it go. As if he needed it everyday like a fish needs water. There was an initial pleasure in it till the whole thing fell apart. It started to consume him. He loved to hate this dependency of his.
Still the questions burnt in his mind and heart. Where did it go wrong that he faces this dilemma? His fight with his own brothers to prove a point. His pointless argue with his parents how they have been biased towards his brother, how he have been ignored, treated like a scum in his wake of life?
No it doesn’t matters anyway now. He couldn’t even hold a pen now. His dependency and withdrawal has made him even handicapped to hold a pen. His hands shook like the leaves in the winter wind and he knew that before it is too late he has to take the step else he may never be able to use his hand again.
The girl he fell for was just the last nail in the coffin. All she said was she was not interested to be even parsed by a beast. So here the beast laid down in vain trying to comprehend where in the path did he lost love. Was it ever known to him? Did he took things granted or was anything ever granted to him. So now it was just the time which needed him to do what was required of him.
The only rational he had was if any part of you body has contacted malignancy that part must be cut off and burnt. So he knew at that time what must be done. So he took the pills. All of them and thought about her, wondering till he saw the bright light and a voice of his dad calling him from the other side.

Somewhere later in the night his younger brother would find him with a noose around his broken neck. He was afraid to die so he overdosed himself with the pills and so when he fell asleep the noose just killed him. That’s how came an end of an unknown actor and no one noticed.

Endless Helpless

2011-02-13T11:15:00.001-08:00

To Kurt
To be here and watch you all
No matter weather big or small
Your race to win and stand tall
To gain , how much they can fall

The tiny spark of old
Has consumed you for your hold
Now you want to beat me in the race
Dont worry I will give up with all the grace

If challenged you threat of blood or gold
Oh what wicket devil has you on his hold
And here I am stuck in the queue
To break free from it, chances are few

And there they are playing God
While together they all fought
Against their own brothers and sisters
Too please the bloody ministers
Roby

My issues

2011-02-13T11:12:00.000-08:00

Well
To start with I am back to ground zero where again I have stopped appreciating things. I mean I have a job, I am earning good enough for me and my family but I am not happy. I mean it’s been so long I have had a hearty laugh without having to think what happens tomorrow. The whole thing is a sell out baby and now I am fading out. God NGO as well as corporate life sucks and sucks real bad and the worst part is people get used to it and the way I am getting used to it. I mean hell why...........Maybe you get too much of something you don’t want and that suffocates you and that is what has happened to me. Maybe I am too scared to take the first step to break my own cage and maybe I want to play it safe. Thing is when I see you all I donno how you live a life so fucking regular, so fucking predictable, so fucking absolute and you know I am fucking jealous of you all coz no matter what you all have time to plan for your self and I don’t. I mean here I am licking the boots of the dirty, filthy lazy government assholes and then the only time I get is the time when I travel from one place to another.

My music, my sketching, my plans go out of the ceiling once I am engrossed into my job while I see my seniors ( well most of them except one) delegating things to us. I mean what kind of assholes they are when they call themselves Leaders. Fuck no way any corporate house can make a leader....Humankind is not that advance to take the place of God to make leaders. They are only born. Frankly once very simple way of defining a leader is one who will work/lead from the front and will have a cause. Others see them fight and jump in to the leaders cause. A Manager is one who will make other jump into the fire to do all the dirty work and once the fire has consumed all the other, the manager remains to rant on and take all their credit to his/ her name. You all decide which one you want.
As they say there are two types of people in the world, Most of them who talk and few who do. I mean in the name of leadership I am watching people do some serious stuff which is not supposed to happen. But then frankly speaking that’s nature eh. The big fish in the sea eats the small fish and the big fish is in turn eaten away by another bigger fish. Gods a pretty dramatic asshole frankly if she has really created this universe like this but then again the greatest mistake of God is humankind. I mean look at us, the highest in the freaking food chain, acting demi god of the earth and look how we breed like ants and cockroaches. The malignancy and the dramatic enthusiasm to produce more of our own kind and then feed them to fight against their own kind. Man I have issue with too many thing and I am clearly not sure why or what but somehow the whole idea of one person cheating another person, one person not valuing another’s feelings or needs or wants makes me very angry. I donno but somehow I have so much of anger build over time that I am very unsure how I will react the day it will erupt. The worst part is I am not sure what to do with my life except the fact that I want the 10 things happen in my life and somehow I am selfish to the extend that it happens fast so that I can die fast.
I mean when I look back to see my parents I find them in peace. My dad struggled a lot, and by lot it means a lot for an orphaned poor farmer boy, who has to bear loads to pay of his school fees to pull a fight against all the odds and come to the place where he is now. I mean I got so much in my childhood I am fucking impossible and I don’t value anything. I got everything in life, like most of us, I had a great childhood but somehow I have grown up to be fucking self centered asshole and now I am not also fucking sure why I cant smile when I am supposed to smile. But when I look back I see my father do what he wanted to do. He broke out of poverty, he broke out of the chain coz he wanted something different. Other of his friends are still there, the way they were so yeah he did something different. Why am I so scared to break out?? Is it coz my ideas, my wants doesn’t go parallel with my parents?? Rest of the world I don’t even give a shit coz I know at the very core you all are as filthy as I am.
Roby

The Last Stand

2010-11-22T11:22:00.000-08:00

To Kurt

No matter what
I am crazy yes
You make me feel
Dizzy yes
I know that
I will never know
Too many choices
Too many places to go
Love to love
The pun of love
Love to hate
The truth of death
Then I wonder
Where to wonder
Save your sympathy
Who will care for thee
The moments gone
And I am waiting again
Addicted to your
Hypocritic wonder
And I saw her
In the wake of the edge
Why do I care
Why should I fetch
And there you go
With your lore
And Here I am
Making my stand
Will you run away
Would you turn back
I dont care
Coz I dont wonder
You maybe in a cross road
Or in the middle of a road
I am in dead end
Or is it the start my friend
Plans to plan
And I wanna run
And yet here I will make
My final Last stand

Roby

Cold Cold Day

2010-11-19T00:13:00.000-08:00

To Kurt

And its a cold cold day
Its winter time and the colds here to stay
And its a cold cold day
Cant see the sun wanna get away

With no one by my side
Its not hard to hide
Yet hard I tried
Still you creep inside

And its a cold cold day
And damp and dark as the fogs sway
And its a cold cold day
We try out hard to make our way

With no one watching me
Oh Please I need some empathy
With no soul on around
Oh please I need a home to stay

And its a cold cold day
With no here to make it go away

Roby

Drops

2010-10-16T05:52:00.000-07:00

Really sucks when in rains in October during the pujas.....this time it happened every day

The Last Rite

2010-09-05T15:18:00.000-07:00

To Kurt

The days grow old and the songs go dry
The leaf went gold and the mood wept and cry
The wound wont heal and I am beyond redemption
To make a comeback is just another apprehension

Good bye, I never been what you wanted to be
Though Honesty have been from mine towards thee
The body refuses to take the burden of mine
25 years seems too long a crime

And here I am facing death on its eye
A truth eventually which you all will try
And here I am scared of taking the dive
Oh how much I love my pathetice posetive vibe

And when its all done by the end of the day
I will be in a place far far away
I will waiting for you brother in the end of the light
U may be scared but dont worry I will help you in your flight

Roby

Death smiles on us all, the best a man can do is smile back. This poem is dedicated to my brother who committed sucide because he couldnt quit drugs. No I am not ashamed for him and neither I find him disgusting. He made choices in life that was his own and lived by it and died by it. At least he didn't faked his life by a plastic smile in his face stating everything is ok. I will still remember his words stating " if an organ in your body is affected by cancer, the best treatment is to cut it off from your body".....I know he is there in the end of the tunnel waiting to receive all of us when we make our journey...I just wish that he found the peace there that he didn't find here.

Sail for the hrizon

2010-06-15T04:04:00.000-07:00

To Kurt

The body was the vessel with my heart as its captain
Sailing was really fun with all these makeshift arrangement
Though mostly the ship never had a sail or a mast
Yet the fun was to wonder in the sea which we perceived vast

There were no albatross neither a jingle bell to toll
Though the sky looked like as if it was about to fall
The mast held on and so the speed
But never ever the captain gave a damn to speed

There were many ports to reach many places to visit
Though it was never mandatory to follow a list
Amid sharks and whales the ship kept its sail
Amidst stormy waves and lashes of hail

No need to worry about the father son and the ghosts
To sail by its own self was what mattered most
Though there were few or many who crossed road
Yet to sail alone was what the captain told

ROBY

Paranormal or Abnormalities

2010-06-03T12:42:00.001-07:00

Hi
Well as far as I can tell I have a certain belief in spirits, Gods, Devils but I have rather been confused all over my life on the issues wether any one of us can contact them or not. I am gonna share a few incidents of my life which I have yet been unable to explain to my own self in a very satisfactory level but I know that there are several possibilities which can fit in that case.

INCIDENT 1
The weird act of Brownie

Brownie was my dog when I used to stay in Shillong. I still donot knwo what breed he was coz I am not very good with Dog lore, only I remember that he was kinda huge and brown and furry and hence I kept his name brownie. Thing is brownie was originally the dog of the landlady Mrs. Fhukan but somehow she didnt like the dog after she bought two new spitch hence she turned browine out of her home. Borwnie got to stay in the compound though and mom and me somehow stuk notes with brownie.
In the same compounf stayed another tenant like us. They were from Assam and the kids of that family were my friends at that time namely Giti and Anirban.
Now this incident happened on the day when Anirbans Mom received the news of her dad's (anirbans grandfather) passed away. The family couldn't leave for Assam that day itself as there was curfew after 40 mins in shillong and a band on the next day.
Any way I was young and it didnt matter much to me but only the aspect that Anirban never came to play with me that evening made me bored. In the hills people eat early and go to sleep early. Same were we as mom dad and my self would have our dinner by 8 in the night and go to bed by 8:30. Before having dinner we used to also make arrangement for Brownie's dinner.
That night though brownies behaviour was a bit changed. After evening only we can hear borwnie barking loudly and running across the compund specially near to Giti's and Anirbans home as if chasing someone. The barks became persistent and mom, Dad and myself went out to see if brownie was ok. Whenever brownie saw us it would sooth him a bit and he would stop barking but then again as we entered our house he would start barking like hell. Even our assamese neighbours were worried that wether there was any person stalking to steal or something like that. Though given to the fact that cases of theft in Shillong in those days were as alien as finding a Dragon in Saturn. But anyway stray cases of drug addiction etc are always there.
So no matter what brownie kept the barking persistent even when we went for bed. Again twice I saw dad getting out in the compound and then brownie became quite. So any way we all gave up on him and thought that he must have gone crazy. After sometime though we heard a huge shriek from our Assamese neighbour. And then can hear the parents calling my mom and dad frantically. On enquiring the family stated that as they were lying in thier bed and they could hardly sleep due to brownies barks both the husband and the lady saw the lady's dads apparation standing right in front of them beside thier bed.
The whole story really scared me. Moreover the whole night brownies weird barking and the same night a ghostly sighting by our neighbours really puts up this question....Can dogs really see ghosts???
Before the event and after the event I never had heard brownie bark that much.....he was a fat happy go lucky kinda dog....

Next post will consits of the next three four incidents....

Enlightenment

2010-06-02T05:32:00.000-07:00

To Kurt

The mirror shows my inner fear

Getting high was so much dear

I will ever medicate

Will you ever forget to hate

I can make you laugh again

Or is there something else you gain

Willl ther be no peace again

Sorry state in a princely game

The smoking gun was left aside

And he lay there in his plight

The nurse gave us the lactating milk

Jesues I need your wine to drink

And then I see him in my dream

He forgot to smile, thats what it seems

And then I reaslise he hanged himself

Dead man never likes to play games

My though compiled into this

Will you ever walk out of me again

Oooo this is me in Love again

When I start melting

And She will see another me

When I am through with my fallacy

And If I be ever allowed to know

Everything I will ever know

Roby

Mindless

2010-05-31T06:21:00.000-07:00

Catastrophy....Air India crashed in the run way while it was making a landing....
Defense consulting is something that is catching up, What is democracy father....Father replies "Son Democracy is something for which we will give up our lives"... There I saw Che smoking a cigar in one poster, And kurt singing rape me with Mahatma Gandhi......somehow the leaves of the oak tree is still green ...though the ice in the Nathula pass is yet to melt....or does it at all melt. Ohh I forgot Dr. Pachaury and his climate change and Micheal Jackson RIP....Bihar needs a new life line and there was a political game been played in West Bengal , Eyeing the dead 100+ in the Howrah Kurla express......Now that free guns are available in the country ...Take U r Pick Baby. Blemish blashphemy and their toothless charity....Whos pulling the strings ....And our RBH left the company and I am at loss....Rhea Joshi made a come back ....And God wheres the truth in all this ......

Temptations

2010-02-01T11:30:00.000-08:00

To Kurt

When it was then I was always looking for answer
Though now I have ended up only with questions to last forever
Wondering in the orchids looking for apples
Didnt realize I was lost among peach tress and maples

Expecting not to expect gains in love
Though I would love to shoot the white dove
Always wanted to know one simple thing
Is hell a cold or a Hot place to live in

The road I hate has always been a crossroad
Accepting change for me has never been bold
Flowers now dont appeal to me
Strangely I know that color is fallacy

Fell in love with the darkness within
Ohh how much fun their is in sin
Temptations is the resultant of free will
The time is ripe to give in

Somehow love is just mimicry
May be it is just a Camouflage of hypocrisy
Maybe it tastes like wild strawberry
May be it is nothing but a disjoint fallacy

I wish I was in you
And wish you to be true
I wish to know.........
Everything I will ever know

Roby

When I was unemployed.....:)

2010-01-20T23:50:00.001-08:00

Well guys

This is the part of the life which I am really greatful that it happened to me. Thing is when one is unemployed one have a lot to time to sit back and evaluate many aspects of life. It may range from what you want to do in with your life, setting your priorities or it can be planning in short term phases. Moreover you have the whole lotta time to do all those thing which perhaps you missed out doing during your busy student life or job life.......

Well the day I was coming back from New Delhi....I was very relieved that I am no more in TERI and specially no more working under Akanksha. It was a real sucker of an experiance working under a person whose managerial capabilities are comparable to a 2 year old kid and whose temperment is much more unpredictable than the wether of Cherapunji.....and a project which doesnt even had any susbtance in it. So any way given to all these aspect I was relived that I am no longer working in LaBL or with Akanksha or with Debojit.

So thing is as I was coming back I had this aspect in mind is I wont start looking for job for the next two months. I wanted to be myself for few days you know. Be very fucking true to my own self. So the first day like after lunch I saw the movie Ashoka was aired in the TV. U know guys it was one hell of a feeling that I could see that movie while lying down in my couch without even have to worry that I have some official delivery tommorow. That was the first time I felt what peace really meant in life. I mean perhaps I feel asleep while watching the movie but when I woke up i felt refresed. It was a feeling perhaps I guess I havent felt for many years @ that point of time.

Well to say that life as unemployed guy is not at all bad. I was like free to read as many novels I would like to and spend my whole day stuck inside one of them, or I could learn a few more bit of cooking from my mom, or I could go ahead learn astrology as long as I wanted to and then I could play guitar till my guts were satisfied with the fill of melody i used to produce. Yeah and apart from that I used to make priorities for myself also. Which meant thing which Sudeep once asked me...what I want to do in life??? A very very important question which I guess most of us should ponder about.

The best part of my unemployed life was to raise a kitten whome I named Fatik. The litter was 5 days old when I found him. Well he was techincally the son of my tenants Tom Cat whos names Krishna. Now given to the fact that Krishna was a pet tom cat whoes area of dominance was the total locality where I stayed Fatik was born to him and another cat...(which is not a pet). But the mother gave birth and brought it to our home and then kkinda left it there. So from there on started my odessy with cats. So from litterally feeding him with milk and stuff and raising it...the whole experiance was quite unique. Cats have really thier issues you know. Like a dog loves his master or owner or how ever you wanna put it....Cats are not so easy to break. Cats got personality and charisma which Dogs I find lack very much. U give a dog some food and dogs are fucking too cheap and they will fall for you. Where as U can never ever break a cat by just offering him food. He will make you feed him then tell you well that was fine but dosnt expect me to do a back flip for your entertainment like a dog does.....Thats the Cat Attitude.

Unlike dogs a Cat will come to you only when he feels like coming to your. No matter how much you call he wont even bother but when a cat comes you then he makes sure that you comfort him to his/hers satisfaction .....soo you see cats need thier own space where as dogs are made to fit in our own space.....but any way ...

So with Fatik also these were very common you see. Few new stuff that I observed with Fatik was that dude was very close with his dad than that with his mom....there were times when both these cats behaviour made me wonder if staying with humans for 5 generations have altered thier behaviour in some manner or what....But any way raising a kitten to a adult tom cat is something and a nice pass time for me during my unemplyement days....

The best part of being unemployed for some time is to do stuffs which you always wanted to do....you know those small things that you had missed out in life....like say catching up with frds, or say going fishing, or say watching back to back movies till u r back starts to ache....

But the best part is to be with your family full time and catch up which you missed perhaps in u r student life and the part of your professonal life when you were not near them......

Frankly I got to know my cousin sis a bit....I actually have never spend much time with her, I got to go to a lot of places with my mom which perhaps didnt happen after 8th standard,,,, U know doing small things like eating pani puri in the road side thella was a great experiance....Visiting all my relatives was something really great.....till the day I was unemployed I never knew that I had some many relatives.....attend every fucntions that came in my way and enjoy it as long as it lasted......Some times doing nothing is a bliss....and I loved every bit of it till it stayed. Perhaps it made me realise that yeah money and job are necessary but the values of family and fun is also as important as the former parts. Well how long has it been that you have take out some time in the cold winter afternoon to enjoy the golden sunshine in your back while you read your favourite novel...???? How often is it that your have been to fishing or something you like doing best with your childhood friends with whome perhaps you lost contact something like 10 years from now.......Well thing is every small things becaome so fucking valuable in life @ that moment...aint that great...

Drifter or Wanderer....Is it the same???

2010-01-19T08:56:00.000-08:00

During my PRINCE 2 certification I met two people in Malviya Nagar Guest House during my dinner every day. Though the first 3 days I hardly talked to them but on the 4th day it so happened that somehow I asked for the rice from one of the two. As he was passing on the rice we began to exchange plesantaries while he asked me what's u r job profile in here. So I said I am bloody consultant in e-gov and blah blah blah. To this he asked I must have had a IT background to which I nodded. He then asked I must also have had a Master's in IT also....to which rectified him that I do have a masters but its in Forest Management.

Well this struck him hard in the face. Then I told him that I am here for the PRINCE 2 certification and hence I am kinda stressed out. To this he replied that never ever take this certification courses for promotion purpose only. Try to utilize it in your own life. Then he said he was also doing PMP certification himself.

Any way the next day his boss...the other guy was also there in the table and when I got introduced to him he was like...woaha....The momet he heard forest management...I knew what he was going to ask next...

Well given the fact that I did B.Tech in computer science then Forest Management then worked in TERI for 1 year 3 months in Renewable Energy stuff and then was job less for 7 months where I travelled a bit with Hans to his kerala farm and then ended up in Wipro as a e-gov consultant who is rite now doing his PRINCE 2 certification and @ the same moment his also trying to do a distance course in Bussiness Law ...it is evitable a person will ask me ...." WHAT DO U WANT TO DO IN LIFE"

U know what I answered....I said I wanna be a farmer who owns 200 acers land...and do farming and ranching there....

To this all that person asked me was..." U dont wanna be a part of this devine rat race"

Well answer was I already am....but I somehow at time get out of it from time to time......

"Well the above description of me by me may most probably potray myself in fornt of all of you that I am a drifter. A person who dosnt have an aim or a ambition......
Well ....but I myself would rather coin the word wonderer associated with me than being termed as a drifter....All my steps in life was a choice...it was like they say in Russian ruolettee....One shot...Everything was a choise. I tried mostly not to make a compromise by keeping my expectations low perhaps...like from day 1 I wanted to be in IIFM more than perhaps I ever dreamed of been in IIMs. Thats choice....and wondering from the B.tech to Forest Management was also a choice...so no I am not a drifter ....I am a wonderer.. I explore things....and the journy continues. These two Wipro guys whom I met said that I am yet to make a choice in life>>> :)
Maybe they r right maybe I already made the choice...."To be the wonderer"
Wat I want to ask is ..." Why worry so much about making choices and doing one thing day in and day out when you know that one day you will outgrow your own self...??"....Life is simple..Life is complex....but thats just a point of view....:) But frankly speaking we all are in a pilgrimage.....soo why worry....the day we complete our pilgrimage, that day life comes to full circle and then the wonderer completes his/her journy....that I think then perhaps will make sense......But till that day lemme wonder in this Garden of Eden...coz i would love to taste the honey of all the flowers that bloom here....:

Being a judge??

2010-01-15T06:09:00.000-08:00

Many high class wackos who proclaim themselves the saviours of our society often says...dont judge people, if yu do yu wont have time to love them......,,,,,,
Then again this trend of homosexuality.....India made it legal few months....Dont know if thats a big deal or not but I dont care.....
Wat I wonder @ time s is if all men and all women becomes homoseual then thats it.....judgement fucking day...aint that so guys.....

No no no dont think i am talking about fucking human rights or any thing against being a gay or lesbian.....it just an observation....
And then again u will find ppl who says they dont judge people........
My 2 cents on this is....if u ever meet this kind of a person remember that this person is the most judgemental in nature.....and also a fucking hypocrite.......
I mean we humans are only different than animals coz we can judge....how can u deny being a fuckign human ass......
Two things are as primitive and as basic in human nature....one is to judge another is the thirst of blood......
Thats it guys this is u.....this is wat we r.....we restrain our thirst for blood because we have the sense of judgement that urges us to restrain.....how in the holy gods name can u resist what yu r.... Do you think this makes you a good human...fuck u if u think like this....U r not being honest with u r though process which makes u a filth is all I know.......Humans are and will always be judgemental..that is what completes us...that is what fullfil us................That is what we are....can u deny it....but yeah yu can always mask it proclaiming that u r Godly.............Remember guys Like Matter has an Anti Matter without which matter is not complete....God s anti mater is Satan without which God is not complete.....hope when u make a choice u can judge the path which leads to these two directions.......Be a good judge....

Love Wanted Unwanted....

2009-12-08T00:35:00.000-08:00

Well to start with Varuna a frd of mine has written something like " Love is an illusion" as status message in Facebook. I tried to counter it but thing is somehow deep down I belive in the same at times.....but when I sit back a look back within the scores of breakup...(Some how all break ups I have witnessed in my life are from the girls side) I found few couples held on very strongly through good times and equally through bad time.....

SO no matter how much I think that Love (among couples) is an illusion people near and dear to me have always compelled me to think otherwise......

TO share some of these couples:-

Sumit and Roli

Sumit is one of the underdogs from IIIT. We were 6 guys in that group. All good for nothing. 5 out of 6 had world class breakoff. Sumit and Roli held on. Now happily married. I guess love was true in this case

Himaghna and Paromita
I came to know Himo when Paromita just walked out of his life. Till that day to this day....the same Paromita went half insane when Himo had an accident and now shes looking after his day-to-day need.....@ the end Himo would have found it difficult to make it alone with a half broken Jaw

A Swiss Gentle Man and his dead wife
(I forgot to ask that guy his name)

I met this old man from Austria sitting next to me in Train. When I asked him what brings him here. He said 22 years back me and my wife came to India and loved the place. Few days back my wife died in my arms. All she said at the end was to burn her body and spread the ash in the Ganges river in India. Thats why he was here...........

Well I donno what love is. Mita says its about staying near to your near and dear one and giving a shoulder to them when required. Do I belive in what she says?? It dosnt matters. I though belive that few time people do love each other.....and no dont confuse me saying this with making compromises. Its just love I guess..No definition, no assimilation, no presumption, no bad joke

Few Long Nights of my life

2009-12-06T22:23:00.000-08:00

There are few nights which are like memorable not because it was plesant but because it was awful, tiresome, cold, risky and yet charming at the end when you are through with the night. Its like a long journy which tests your patience, your intigrity and perhaps your character as a whole. Well its not like a win or losse situation here but its more like a survival test in your life......and how few people from whom one expects the least comes to your rescue and ho some of those people who are near you leaves you to your situation .....
Night @ Road: Gangtok to NJP
This year 2009 when there was Aila in West Bengal I left Gangtok for Kolkata on the next day. As I had my tickets book for a train named Garib Rath which was supose to leave the next day early morning @ 4 from NJP. Hence I started from Gangtok @ 6 in the evening. The fact that via a luxary car it will take around 4 hours and one hour given to the monsson factors to reach NJP.
As usual the journy started with me buying a big Kurkure Pac and few fags for my trip and two bottles of water. I made a halt @ Rongpo to withdraw few amount of doe to make my payment to our travel agent. Everything was cool except for the fact that it was raining all through the day and the rain hadent yet stopped till then.
I was about to reach Melli....Another Bengal Sikkim border when there was a huge traffic in front of our car...." I said hell man....must be another landslide"...took out a fag and got off the car to have a reccee of the situation....The only thing that blew me out of my mind is I saw a jewel like light from the headlight of the cars in the traffic for a stretch of about 3 km and then a break in the same which means that either the road is damaged there or there is laqnd slide. The former case is much worse for me than the later case. Well that was my first guess when I came to knew that there was landslide which has just taken place in the heart of melli and army officials have blocked off the road. Well I needed to take a call on the situation as the traffic behind my car....given to the fact that I had two options to take a road from either Jorethang or rabangla which will take me out from the other side of melli but both these roads were equally fatal and risky to travel in night and givne to the fact the Finance Secretary died in the road accident in the road to Ravangla few months back to me.....
Any way when I presented the case to my driver he said there is a third option which is much more riskier but shorter ..It was the NTPC road from Rongpo to Kalimpong which will take me to Teesta from where I can have a smooth sail to NJP. Given to the fact that I had a lot of time in hand I wanted to venture through Jorethang as the road was much safer but was worries as I didnt knew exactly where in melli the road was blocks...so the tought passes me that if I am unlucky then I might end up in melli Jam from the other side....Hence I rejected the idea of Ravangla and Jorethang and opted for the Kalimpong road......Now the only draw back in Kalimpong road was it was much steeper.....with no other car or vehicles which ply in that road and chances of landslides in this road was as high as in any other hilly road........So the only person with whom I can share my experiance was Himaghna.....So well I called him up and gave him a detailed replay of the situation I was through.......for some time everything weas exciting but smooth then suddenly I found out that NTPC has a check post which has the road blocked off . After pleading a lot with the officials who were sleepgin the time we reached there they aggred to open the road block for us but stated that there can be land slides further in the road and if so ....and if we turn backl they wont let us return through that road block again......any way me and my driver were the men of the moment...and the goal was to reach NJP any how.....after 20 mins drive .....our worst fear... large chunks of boulders and muds in the road...The only option is both of us got down and fought for 20 more minutes to remove the boulder when suddenly without any warming few more boulders missed me by inches and just behind me there was anothr land slides.....ohhh hell gain,,,...Me and my driver made a hurculian effort to clear of ass much as we can ...after like 40 mins there was a bit of clearance and somehow we tok out the qualis through it....with off courase few scratches and muds in our hands........
So the road from there to NJP through kalimpong was chilling..beautifull through the cluods and uneventfull.....On reaching NJP I came to knew that our car was the onyl car from Gangtok which reached NJP.....but then again I had to stay awake till four in the morning....Somehow my mom and himaghna made it possible for me to stay awake till that time.........
This one night made me realise how much himaghna as a frined perhaps understands me and how much my mom also as a frd will stay awake for me ..:)
Train from Delhi 2 Bhopal...
This is about my return trip from Delhi to Bhopal during nmy 2nd OT. Well given to the fact that I didnt had any warm cloths or bed shets etc to protec me from cold I told Abhishek Kar (Dada) that I would like to share his sleeping bag in the train. To this he aggred and I was quit content. but Sam somehow said to me...you might not be able to share the Air bag with dada...he wont share it with you....so he made me drink 4 pegs of Rum and 3 joints of Hash....So thati become so numb that i wont be able to fell the chill.....On reaching the train I found out Binny (another class mate of mine) has one big Quilt...which was very luring for my case....but any way I was content that dada wil share his sleepign bag with me....
Any way as the train started I brought up the case about sharing dadas sleeping bag to which he didnt give me a direct answer./...Then after few more discussions he made me understood that he is in no mood to share his sleeping bag.....and after some time he went to the upper bunk and that made it obvisous that "dude no sleeping bags for you"""
So I rationalised that I am smelling old monk and I m high on has so who the hell would like to share nything with me....I didnt even though about asking binny s help with the quit 1st I was swmelling rum, 2nd I was a guy she a girl and it was very awkward situation for me to ask for a quit to spend the night underneath it, 3rd I though when Dada after everything back out...there was no reason she should help me...given to the fact that I was totally in a haze and Dada has also passed on this message to Binny si she was aware of my situation....AllI did was I took off to the middle berth and tried to getr a sleep...Man It was mid november and it was cold like hell....
suddenly binnys motherly instincts kicked in...she called me and said I can share her quilt......Man it was so fucking generous for her to offer a totally detuned guy to share her quilt.....Till this day and perhaps till days to come I will always be in debt to the little warmth she provided me with her quilt....It was a life saver from sure shot pnemunia......Any way after that I tried to be as much decent as I can be so that binny dosnt fell uncomfortable ..and perhaps in that aspect I kept her talking till 4 in the morning after which her speech was getting slurred and she had to sleep.....So I kept on sitting in the one end of the seat till early 6 o clock in the morning after which we came to knew that the train was 4 hours late.....so after a cup of tea somehow I managed a small nap ....
But in the end when a guy back oyut of sharing a sleeping bag which would perhaps made it much easier for him to do...It was a girls maternal insticnt which was a life saver for me.....Cant really forget that aspect in life....
The Bus Ride from Jim Corbett to Dehradun
This was one hard night for the 5 of us who were in Utteranchal. We were taking a overnight from Ramgarh to Doon when one small incident changed the total scenario in the journey. A couple with thier kid was in the bus and the husband wanted the bus to stop in a certain location which was just few meters away from the bus stop. So the eternal debate started between the two Indian Males i.e the bus conducter and the husband. At the end it was a threat from the husband stating that he wont let the bus move without paying back for the insult.
Any way aroudn 15 mins from that area there was a bus junction hence the bus stopped there and the driver and the conducter went to have thier dinner over there...Few mns from that moment the husband turn up with few local goons and gave one heck of a beating to the driver when he failed to find the conducter......So at the end no matter what the driver refused to drive ...and stated that if hes made to drive the bus he will drive into valley intentioanlly....
So it was mayday for us...I as usual took off all my stuff and so did my 4 other companions namely Satya, Binay, Prov and Ashu.....So 5 of us were having 12 luggages and hence we all missed the next bus to doon....on been left stranded in the bus stop @ 12 in the night I did what I did the best...I started playung guitar////...After sometime when I looked up I saw ppl surround me and look at me like i was an alien playing banjo in a rooftop...
One smart ass also asked me a question...hey dude whats that stuff you are playing....Harmonium????
I said WTF man...I packed the guitar and went for a smoke...We came to know that the next bus to doon will come after an hour.....Meanwhile satya wzas taking pics of the place where there was that awsome greek god fight between the driver and the husband when suddenly few ppl came to him and said.."" Sahb..please dont falsh this nwes in tommorows paper....we can pay you something to keep this aspect a secrect""""Satya was an ass and rejected the money and said honestly that his interest was just to capture the moment and not a reporter......
Ay way thing is the next bus the only passangers were we 5 guys and it was cold like hell......The Driver in the initial moment said.." Guys if u wanna ride in my bus I will take you to Doon in my own speed..." Well as we had all the time in life so we were quit good with it.....Ny way by the time we reached Haridwar....It was cold cold cold like hell and it was raining also and windy..... most of us were trying to sleep in the seat...with Satya who was stuck in between the Gap of the seat to keep himself Warm....
We Reached Doon @ 3 o clock in the morning..It sonwed the night and Doon was also cold like hell in the last week of December....
The thing is somehow we Managed to pull that night through together.....

Waiting List didnt confirm

This happned on my Latest trip back from Gangtok to Kolkata. Thing is Everything from entering West Bengal started to go wrong....Three Road blocks and stuff like that was making me edgey. Then also the fact that my ticket didnt get confirm. Ny way when I reached NJP station I took out all my luggage and then forgot to put my mobile....... As the Car left I remembered I left my mobile in the Car. I saw a guy in red track suit standing in front and asked him " dude I left my mobil" can I use u r mobile and call mine so that the driver can help me out with my mobile....
Then I realised I dont remember my mobile number and then suddenly I remembered that I have the bill from this car and then called up....Well thanks to that s guys help with his mobile I got my mobile...... Then Next I saw my W/L has not being confirmed and my e-tickets got canclled by itself
Next I kept pesterning the TTE to give me seat in A/C....I overdid it so much that he said ...bhayee I m the TTE for the sleeper class....then he took me to the TTE for the A/C and he said boss no seats available in A/C..even I gave my seat to another guy who just gave me a lucrative offer....
So I was left with no choice and opt for Sleeper....The TTE for the Sleeper class was a bihari guy, Nice and cool and said that I need to buy a general class ticket and he will help me out with my seat....
So next is I ran over and baught a general ticket and then bribed the TTE with 400 bucks ....and he said ok u go and sit in the 7th seat in S-2 coach

When I reached i saw another guy sitting there....i was fuckign furious..I asked him how much the TTE took from him and he said nothing....DAmn I thought am I the only one today whos having a bad day....but next the TTE came over and took 600 bucks from him and alloted him a seat in 63 no. berth...
Then the TTE after finishing his job and stuff came to me and chatted over for 2-3 hours....I learnt fwe things like presently TTE get 37k salary, then they make 400 from each persons in sleeper class, and they avoid their job in AC class as the scope of taking bribes from thatr place is very vry low and risky.....
So after Malda the TTE got off and told me not to worry....but sadly for me the worry was the cold......
Of all my jounrnies in life this was the coldest...I did had my self clothed with 4 layers of warm cloths but no blanket or quit made life hell specially my legs were cold and my ears were freezing....The best I could do is took my towel and used it blanket.....
No matter wat I couldnt sleep, I couldnt keep my eyes open for long....but somehow I kept my date with the cold and reached kolkata early in the morning...

Then and Now

2009-11-20T01:24:00.001-08:00

Then :-

I used to dream a lot

Now: -

I still do the same

Then: -

I used to play a lot

Now:-

It is only restricted to computer games

Then:-

I was too crazy about my girlfrd

Now:-

I am too crazy about her still now

Then: -

I was always afraid of marrying her

Now:-

I am still afraid of the same

Then:-

Planning was a thing for old and foolish

Now:-

Seems I became the old and foolish

Then:-

I couldnt sit at any place for more than 10 mins

Now:-

Now its not more than 5 mins

Then:-

I could give my right hand to learn play guitar like SLash

Now:-

If I give my right hand how will I eat

Then:-

I loved the winter afternoon

Now:-

Round the year its winter for me

Then:-

I wanted to eat a lot of kurkure

Now:-

I spend that money in smoking

Then:-

Cycling was my favurite past time

Now:-

The same thing didnt transfer to bikes or cars so I avail to walking

Then:-

Working all night was a nightmare

Now:-

Not working all night is a nightmare

Then:-

Wanted to be in Airforce

Now:-

Thankgod I am not there

Then:-

Wanted to be a guitarist

Now:-

I am one..well half aked thoug but yet

Then:-

Promises were made to be kept

Now:-

Committments are made to be broken after payment :)

Then:-

I liked to sit alone near a medow or a pond by myself for long hours

Now:-

I miss those lonely moments

Then:-

Paper weights and the design inside it used to facinate me a lot

Now:-

Its only a paper weight

Then:-

I wanted to be financially independent

Now:-

I am financially enslaved

Then:-

Pastries and Burgers in Monginis were a delicacy

Now:-

Its junk food

Then:-

Porn magazines were costlier than gold

Now:-

Burn magazines to keep me out of cold

Then:-

A Girls smiles at me used to mean she fell for me

Now:-

A girl tell " I love you" seems like a bluff to me

Then:-

Swinging from one coconut tree to another through its leaves was estacy

Now:-

Cant tell for sure which one is a coconut tree and which is a palm tree

Then:-

Making Paper plans and flying them was like getting high

Now:-

Even Cream cannot take me that high now

Then:-

Paper boats were our passport to the dreamland fantasy

Now:-

Floating in the raft of hopeless mystry

Then:-

Sharing tiffin was fun

Now:-

U need to buy bad pun

Then:-

God was Gay for me

Now:-

God is still Gay for me...though its upto you all how you comprehend this word GAY....

In the end I always think life is a journey so rather than taking too much trouble in locating the next destination we can always enjoy the road and look back at times to the passed stations which sometimes do bring a smile in the lips.

Rather than cribbing what I have done in life I would always like to live as what I am doing right now......