Gonzogoose Roost

Change is Good

noreply@blogger.com (Brant W. Fowler) — Mon, 29 Sep 2014 20:52:00 +0000

The past few years have been especially rough for me for reasons I won't go into here. Bottom line is I was completely stressed out, depressed, unsure of myself and my future, angry, sad... you name it. I saw no way out, and even though I did pray and work, I just couldn't get my head above it to figure out a solution. That happens when you're that deep in a dismal situation.

Finally, an answer to my prayers came from an unexpected source, and I've been happier in the past few months than I have been in years. I am no longer in that awful, soul-sucking situation, and I finally have a clear head again. I only wish I could say the same for my mother and brother.

For those of you that don't know, on July 10th - coincidentally both my mom's and brother's birthday - I moved from Kentucky to Texas. A good friend of mine had an extra room and really wanted to help me out of the situation I was in. So after much prayer and consideration, I took the plunge. And ever since, I have been living in a small town in Eastern Texas.

I was skeptical moving so far away from the place I had called home for the majority of my life, and I had no idea what to expect once I got here. But really it's not that much different at all, at least not in the area I'm in. And the people I've met here and have surrounded myself with now are super kind, supportive and caring. Genuinely caring.

Change can be a scary thing, but it's something I desperately needed even more than I realized. And while things aren't perfect - they never are, right? - they are SO much better than I could have imagined. I am happy, I am revitalized, I am clear-headed and focused, I'm no longer stressed or depressed, sad or angry. I worry about my family, but aside from that, I am in such a better place than I have been for years.

I never thought of all the places I could go that I would end up in Texas. But I haven't regretted this move for one second. Who knew?

Change was needed, change was made, and now things are good again.

So for anyone that I haven't told yet that happens across this blog post, I apologize and I hope you can be happy for me. The move happened very quickly and I had little time to prepare, let alone inform everyone. The important thing is I'm in a better place, mentally, emotionally, spiritually and physically. Figuratively and literally. So be happy for me, my friends. I know I am!

-B

Think Before You Speak

noreply@blogger.com (Brant W. Fowler) — Fri, 27 Jun 2014 11:33:00 +0000

"Think twice before you speak, because your words and influence will plant the seed of either success or failure in the mind of another." - Napoleon Hill

One of my greatest pet peeves is when people speak on situations they have no idea about. When they share their opinions - secondhand at that - on situations others are going through without truly knowing the facts. But placing themselves in a position of an authority on the matter at hand.

Sure, we're all entitled to our own opinions, and anyone with two brain cells can look at a situation and form said opinion based on various factors. We all do that, but that's not what I'm referring to. What I'm referring to is when one hears one side of a situation and formulates not only an opinion, but also a response about the situation as if they were fully informed.

When we are faced with the situations of loved ones, we innately jump to defend that side without ever considering the other side at all. What we truly need is more objective thinking and reasoning and less one-sided, biased opinions informing our stance on situations.

I understand that sometimes, in certain cases, the fault of one party over another is undeniably clear, and in those cases, sure, we can rightly form an opinion based on those facts, one-sided or not. For example, if someone breaks into a house and shoots the resident, it is clear where the blame lies in that given situation. There is no reason to consider the other side. And while that may be an extreme example, it illustrates the point I'm making.

Take, however, a couple arguing. Let's say one party is feeling neglected, while the other party is feeling smothered. If you are close friends with one of these parties, chances are you will jump to their defense and place all the blame on the other party. But is that really fair? No, it is not. You don't know the full story and both sides of the argument. All you know is what one party relayed to you in confidence, and you have formed a biased opinion based on that information.

If you really wanted to help this hypothetical couple, and if they wanted your help (which is first and foremost here), you would listen objectively to both parties and then offer your assistance in helping them resolve what issues they were each dealing with.

I get that there's a sense of loyalty that comes into play in most of these situations, but I'm not just referring to couples either. This goes for friends, business partners, family members, religious leaders, political leaders, etc. We, too many times, base our opinions on a limited amount of facts and/or hearsay and never seek out the full truth of the matter. And then we present our opinions with some level of validity that paints us as an expert on the matter.

No matter how eloquent you may be in your presentation, your opinion is still one-sided and therefore uninformed, resulting in you speaking out of turn and potentially souring others on the party you've placed your judgment - however vague or mildly so - upon.

I will never claim to be perfect or to have all the answers. Nor will I ever make the statement that I am right all the time, or that none of my opinions are biased. I'm just as flawed and imperfect as anyone else, and I make mistakes like anyone else. I know what they are, and I try to correct them or learn from them as I can. I am accountable... when I have something to be accountable for. No one will ever be harder on me than I am on myself.

What I can say, though, is that I sincerely try to look at all sides of every situation, and to place myself in others' shoes as much as I possibly can when coming to a conclusion about something. No, I can't completely do that as we all have different experiences and none of us will ever truly know what another person has gone through. We all perceive things differently, and that degree of perception dictates how great or small various things affect us. One occurrence may be no big deal to one person, while it may be devastating to another. But still, I try.

That's all we can do. We try to better ourselves, we try to understand each other, and we try to live our lives as peaceably as we possibly can. To do that, we have to face ourselves and ask ourselves if we are truly making informed decisions and opinions, or if we're getting seeds of information or gossip and basing our entire philosophies off those tidbits.

The bottom line is, you may know certain things about certain individuals, and the situations they are in and the obstacles they face. But you don't truly know them and everything they've gone through, especially when you are only talking to the opposite side and never considering for a moment that the counterpart may have something valuable to add to your opinion on the matter at hand.

Think, people. Think before you speak and let the world know what your true motivations and instincts are, and what limited resources they are based upon. Think to speak to the other parties involved before making blanket statements based on half-truths and misinformed notions of what you feel are justified thoughts and actions. Think what effect your words will have on those who are familiar with the situation you speak of, even if you try your best to keep it vague. If you truly care, think. Or don't speak at all.

-B

Trying to Restrain

noreply@blogger.com (Brant W. Fowler) — Sat, 01 Feb 2014 23:58:00 +0000

I want SO bad to rant and rave here, but I'm not going to do that. I've mentioned several times how I don't want this blog to be me whining about this or that. I know you all don't want to read that, and I don't want to be remembered for that impression.

That said, I am having a really hard time restraining myself in that regard today. You ever have one of those weeks where little things build and build up until one last thing just sets you off? That's where I'm at today.

The past couple of days, some things have happened that kind of ruined those days. To say they put me in a bad mood would be the understatement of the year. Completely wrecked my focus and drive to the point of a near standstill. And then today, something that just happened just set me off. Just the way it was done and what little regard was given.

Anyway, that's where I'm at. I'm furious, but at the same time I'm just annoyed and frustrated with everything. I have spoken many times about needing a change, and that change has never been needed more than now.

In the interest of partial disclosure, my current living situation is anything but ideal, and I'm incredibly unhappy in it. But it's beyond my means at this time to change it. Every time I take a step toward that, I get pushed back ten. I am living with people I don't want to live with and don't really get along with, at least not anymore. And it has taken a huge toll on me, just ask my closest friends.

Anyone that knows me knows I work my butt off. But they also know where a lot of that pay goes, which is also not ideal. But it is what it is. I'm no slacker despite what certain people think of me. They just simply don't know me as well as they think they do, and have no clue what goes into what I do for a living.

I need to get out of here and I don't know how. Circumstances currently prohibit me from doing any other kind of work at the moment, and honestly, I don't have time for it anyway. I've got too much on my plate.

I don't know what I hoped to achieve in blogging about this, or whether it will make me feel better or not getting it out there. And I certainly don't know how to change things or I would have a long, long time ago.

If I can get my act together, I'll be a published author later this year. Prose, not comics. That's a huge step towards one of my dreams and goals, and one that could open lots of doors. That's then, though, not now. Still, I've worked for years toward certain goals and had many doubters, some of which live in this house with me. My hard work and sacrifice has paid off before, and it is paying off now. I'm not ready or willing to give that up.

So I don't know what the answer is. I just know if something doesn't change soon, both with my living situation and other circumstances that are prohibiting me from moving forward, I don't know what I'll do. I'm kind of an emotional mess because of these things. I do a pretty good job of holding it together and putting on a brave face and voice, but inside is raging sea of turmoil that I just don't know how to calm and set right.

The way I figure it, I need about $3-4,000 to get out of here and get a fresh start. Between rent wherever I go, past utility bills and new connection fees, food and supplies, and so forth, that would get me started. From there, it would be a struggle for a while, but I could manage I think.

Problem is, even though I'm constantly working, I'm not making enough to save that up in short order (and I have limited time - this house is up for sell), nor am I getting jobs that pay that large at this time.

Again, I don't know, I just felt like writing and really had to get this off my chest. I'm tired of complaining to my core friends, and though they are very supportive and never make me feel like I'm a bother, it still has to grate on people trying to enjoy their own lives or dealing with the own problems. So I turn here.

Whoever is reading this, thank you for indulging me. Any positive thoughts and/or prayers are greatly appreciated. And hey, if you're in the market for a letterer, logo designer or writer, keep me in mind!

-B

Year of the Gonzogoose!

noreply@blogger.com (Brant W. Fowler) — Wed, 01 Jan 2014 16:24:00 +0000

Happy New Year, everyone! I hope everyone enjoyed the holidays and has a wonderful year going forward!

The Chinese Zodiac tells you that 2014 is the Year of the Horse. I don't really pay attention to astrology and zodiacs, personally, but instead, I'm declaring my own distinction for 2014...

THE YEAR OF THE GONZOGOOSE!

That's right, this is going to be my year!

2013 was a rough year for me. Probably one of the roughest years of my life, and I've had some bad ones. Just situations weren't... optimal, and every time something good happened, it felt like ten bad things followed it. So I am happy to be shedding that year off and moving forward.

I do have New Year's Resolutions, but I'm keeping those to myself for now. One main resolution I have, though, is to KEEP my New Year's Resolutions! lol

I'm one of the many that keeps making them, knowing I'll never hold fast to them, and then doing it all over again the following year. But this year, I'm breaking the cycle. I am ready for change - I NEED change, in may facets and areas of my life. And so I'm going to make them happen.

I have been trying, BELIEVE ME! It just hasn't worked out. So this year I'm doubling, nay tripling my efforts, so I can finally have some peace of mind.

I often feel completely stressed out and overwhelmed. One goal is to not feel that way as much, because it is taking a toll mentally and physically.

As I stated in the last post, though there has been plenty of bad, there was some good that came from 2013, and those are the moments and instances I am cherishing and treasuring. They give me hope going forward. And that's where my focus is. Not looking back, and not even "looking" forward, but "moving" forward.

So while I won't divulge my resolutions for 2014 just yet, I not only intend on keeping them, I WILL keep them. I must. There's no maybe, no but, no if this happens or that. It's a done deal, signed and delivered. This will be the Year of the Gonzogoose!

HONK!

-B

Christmas...

noreply@blogger.com (Brant W. Fowler) — Sun, 22 Dec 2013 12:48:00 +0000

This year doesn't feel like Christmas to me. I haven't been able to get into the spirit of things. I've tried, and I'm sure I'll muster a little bit come the day. I'm just not really feeling it this year.

This past year has just been... trying. And things haven't quite fallen into place as much as I had hoped they would by now. And that puts a damper on things. Professionally, things are fine. Personally, things could be better.

This post isn't to whine about all that, though. I just felt like blogging, and this is what was on my mind. I do understand the true "reason for the season" as they say. And trust me, I'm not upset about gifts and all that. I do get joy out of giving, though, and that's just hardly possible this year. But still, that's not even it.

I had hoped a couple of things in particular would have worked out and come to fruition by now, but they didn't. And so the holiday I usually can't wait for (I'm the guy that's typically playing Christmas music in October in anticipation) just feels like another regular week filled with the same old stuff I do every week.

My surroundings this year are less than desirable, I'll be honest. I'm not happy about that. Circumstances have dictated this be the case for now, but I wish that were not so. And that's all I'll say about that.

I really don't mean to be a downer. Despite the negative crap that's gone down this year, and the current doldrums I find myself in amid my favorite time of year, some truly wonderful things have happened to me this year.

I was blessed with some amazing friends, who blessed me in amazing ways this year. Certain friends in particular were there for me in my roughest spots, and helped me get through in ways I hardly deserved. I have some true friends in my life that understand me, support me, and truly have my back, and I thank God every day for them. They have been a great blessing to me this year. I would have gotten through the tough times without them because I'm a fighter and survivor, and because God would have seen me through. But the way God chose to help me through was through the help of my friends. And for that I am eternally grateful.

This year, I've also made several new friends who have become a new community for me, and I enjoy every minute I get to talk to them, even if I don't get to see them.

And work, while up and down as always with freelance, has been surprisingly consistent throughout. Usually, this time of year, I find myself scraping the bottom of the barrel to find work. This year, I have three projects due before Christmas! So yeah, things have been far more steady than they usually are, and I can't help but be thankful for that.

So no, this year doesn't really feel like Christmas to me, nor am I in that jovial holiday mood, but I still count myself blessed and find myself thankful for those blessings that occurred throughout the year. If I can't have Christmas the way I would like, at least I can look back on these things and know that my Christmas came early and often, and that even better things await in the year to come.

God bless, everyone, and have a very Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays! Wherever you are, whatever you're going through, remember the blessings, however large or small, that have been bestowed upon you in your lives.

-B

Comic Frontline

noreply@blogger.com (Brant W. Fowler) — Sun, 24 Nov 2013 19:12:00 +0000

Comic Related, a website I co-own and co-run on a daily basis, has recently partnered up with Comic Frontline, a blogger run by my good friends of Dark Avenger INC.

Comic Frontline does the same stuff Comic Related does, posting comic news and reviews and other content. But there are some features and items posted there CR doesn't always cover, and by partnering with them, we have access to their content, and our RSS feed runs the latest five CR posts in their sidebar. So it's a great collaboration.

Today, I have a weekly feature starting on Comic Frontline going behind the scenes of what we, as comic press, do and deal with. The ups, downs, trial and error, good and bad. I started really early this morning with an intro column, followed by a full entry that just went live.

The first official installment chronicles my introduction into comic press for a site called Comic Avalanche. I talk about how I got involved, and how I ended up doing a LOT more than I originally intended.

Next week, I talk about the next site I was involved with, and then I'll be talking about Comic Related. After that, I plan to delve deeper into the ins and outs of what we do and how it's done. Should be an interesting journey.

Many times on this blog, I hold back because I know people from both my past and present, and from different divisions of my life read this. I know because I get comments from some of them, anonymously of course. Recently, I think I chided them in a post, can't remember if I deleted it or not. I was in a bad mood that day. heh I just got aggravated by the "anonymous" nature of the comments.

Anyway, that's neither here nor there. Comics are a part of who I am, and always have been. Anyone that really knows me knows I've read comics since I was six years old, and aside from a 5-year period just before and during college, I never stopped. Even then, I'd occasionally buy a couple here and there.

So, I'm not going to hide from that passion of mine anymore. I have many passions, and unlike many people I know, I don't feel like you have to turn one side of yourself off to let the other side shine. I think there's a balance, and moderation is key with everything.

Okay, so that rant is over. I do intend to try to post here more often now. And I'll try to keep the frantic ramblings like the last post to a minimum.

In closing, please check out Comic Frontline, not only for my new feature, but for all the great content over there... if you're a comic and TV fan that is. :)

-B

At Wits End

noreply@blogger.com (Brant W. Fowler) — Fri, 04 Oct 2013 15:48:00 +0000

It is SO hard to restrain yourself and keep it together when you are constantly being attacked, over and over again, by people who claim to love you.

Here's a tip: Don't offer a kindness only to throw said kindness in one's face every single chance you get. That's not kindness at all.

These people not only kick you when you're down, they run over you with a bulldozer.

And some people that claim to be Christians need to learn what that word truly means. You're not.

As you can tell, I'm having a VERY frustrating day. I know you are supposed to pray for your enemies, turn the other cheek, and all that. I've prayed, and I ran out of cheeks a long time ago. Life has dealt me some... very intense and unavoidable situations over the past few years, and I can honestly say the last year has been the hardest of my life. Considering my life, that's saying a LOT.

Bottom line is when you're in tough situations, you learn real quick what people in your life are truly like. And to be perfectly honest, I'm sick and tired of having toxic people in my life. I want to move forward, but feel stuck and don't see a way out of my current situation, at least not immediately, which is what I so desperately need.

That said, let me make a positive note, because it is highly warranted here. I was recently blessed greatly, beyond what I deserved by a very dear person. That eliminated a few issues and will ultimately help me immensely. And for that, I'm eternally thankful, grateful, and I praise God for it.

But sadly, there are still other issues and factors that I can't seem to get around, and it worsens by the day because of my living situation and those I'm surrounded by. I have tried, and tried, and tried to come up with a solution. I've worked my butt off, I've looked into things, I've done the legwork. But no solution presents itself. And those people I mentioned sure don't make it easier. And unfortunately, at the moment, I can't escape them.

This is not a whining post - this is me expressing my frustration in the only way that is possible for me at this time - through the written word. I have held my peace for a year, and I have taken, and taken, and taken. But expressing that frustration in other ways would only do more harm than good, so, again, I'm trying hard to restrain myself. Believe me, it's a challenge!

I don't expect anything from this post, and I'm not putting out another cry for positive thoughts and prayers (though I won't turn them away, either). I just needed to put this into words and try to get on with my day.

Why do so in a public format? As I've said before on this very blog, there's something freeing about releasing it into the ether of the internet. Just writing it for myself feels like bottling it up and gives me no true release. So here, my thoughts flow freely, yet vaguely. I don't feel the need to call people out specifically or divulge every detail of my personal life. I just need to express it in a way that gives me some kind of release.

But going back to the topic at hand, I just need a way out of my current situation and I can't find it. I wish I could be more specific, but that's all I'll say. Anyone that feels a similar way, I can relate and I sympathize with you.

-B

Back to the Page Once More

noreply@blogger.com (Brant W. Fowler) — Sun, 28 Jul 2013 23:06:00 +0000

While I am still feeling the urgency of my last post here, I found myself receiving a reprieve of a different sort. I mentioned last time that getting my thoughts out here was therapeutic, as writing always seems to be for me. It's kind of a way of channeling my emotions, and therefore gaining me some modicum of release.

This weekend, I found that release.

See, this past week has been extremely trying. The heartless and uncaring actions of certain parties brought me to a level of discontent and pure anger that I very rarely go to and, quite frankly, do not like reaching. In my early teens, I used to bottle up my emotions, letting everything build to a fever pitch, then they would explode in small fits of rage, which usually left holes in walls or items around the house broken. It was still rare, but very destructive when it occurred. I had yet to discover writing, and apparently art wasn't doing the trick in those isolated situations. I had no release, so I released it in the most base of ways.

I outgrew that quickly, and never looked back toward that type of behavior. I didn't care for myself at those times, as I reminded myself of my own childhood and those around me at the time carrying on in very similar ways. My entire life, I've strove to be the exact opposite, and those moments of weakness left me critical of myself.

When I discovered writing, it somehow helped me focus my thoughts, and I was able to get past fits of anger with just a few lines on a page. It didn't even need to be about the situations at hand, I just needed to write and it would wash away for a time. The creative arts tend to provide that release for some reason. Maybe it's the rush of creating, or the expulsion of energy that drives those emotions away, or rather helps you work through them, I don't know. I do know that art helped me through a lot, but eventually it wasn't good enough. Music and singing was always another strong means of expression for me, but you can't always belt out when you're frustrated. Writing, however, is silent and can be done just about anywhere.

This weekend, after the intense rush of anger and frustration that flooded me through the week, somehow I found inspiration to write. You may recall in previous posts how I've stated that I've had very little time to write, or had trouble finding the inspiration. For whatever reason, this weekend things clicked for me and I wrote, and wrote, and wrote.

I didn't have time to write - I do have a lot of work on my plate at the moment - but I just had to make the time, take the time this weekend, and I feel so much better having done so. Sometimes you just need to force yourself to break out of the monotony of the everyday life and do something for you. That's what I did.

I'd love to say I sat here and wrote half a novel, or something of that level of productivity, but that would be a lie. Instead, I channeled my writing in three different ways, giving me both expression and variety, which left me immensely satisfied.

First, an idea for a column on ComicRelated.com struck me. It was just something I had thought was a neat idea, but I wasn't sure I could pull it off. Before I knew it, I had written the introduction column to it, and planned out the format and schedule for it down to the day. More on that soon.

Second, I finally was able to gather my thoughts for a concept to a prose anthology I was invited to participate in months ago. It's called Singularity: The Rise of the Posthumans, and is a sort of futuristic steampunk superhero anthology. Being new to pulp-style writing and not having written prose in quite some time, I struggled with both a concept and wrapping my head around the method. I was a bit intimidated as my collaborators consist of many accomplished authors, and some of their concepts were similar to my initial idea. So for months, while dealing with all kinds of other distractions, I wrestled with the project. This weekend, it all finally broke and I churned out a complete bio/synopsis for my character and his story. I've yet to hear back from the project head, but even if he dislikes it, I'm proud of myself for getting to this point. Now, of course, I have to write a 6-10,000 word short story in a month! But that's okay, I'm up for the task.

And third, I wrote a blog post, again on Comic Related, about a certain story element in a current story arc going on in the world of comics. It's such a small thing compared to the other two, but it still left me with the same level of satisfaction.

I love to write, and at times I feel like I don't have time, or can't process my thoughts given my circumstances, workload and situations. This weekend, I proved to myself that I can - I just need to make or take the time to do so. If for nothing else, for my own sanity.

Did my writing this weekend solve all my problems? Of course not. But still, it gave me peace about them, at least for the time being. The writing bug has bitten me once more, and I want to give into the insatiable hunger that it has left me with. As I said, I love to write. And so I shall write.

-B

Seeking Change

noreply@blogger.com (Brant W. Fowler) — Sat, 06 Jul 2013 01:46:00 +0000

Do you ever have one of those days you just want to scream? You just need some kind of release, but you can't get it in your current environment? You feel like punching everyone and everything in your path. Of course you refrain, but it's just bottled up and you want to let it out.

Today has been one of those days for me. What started off as a rather calm day quickly took a turn as forces surrounding me turned it into a nightmare. Now usually I can write my thoughts out and kind of channel my emotions that way. But in a public blog, that's not always the best course of action.

For some reason, though, just writing those thoughts privately, sharing with no one just doesn't do the trick. That said, I'm not going to divulge the day's events here. This is more of a diversionary tactic, writing this post, in hopes that I can release enough of the pent up frustration to rest easy.

The past three years of my life have been very, very trying. Setback after setback has impeded me, and attack after attack has thwarted me at every turn. First, there was being ill and initially getting no help at all to take care of that illness, which resulted in losing half my clientele from being too sick to work. Then my mom got even sicker and had major surgery to correct that sickness after terrifying my brother and I. And almost immediately after, we lost everything with seemingly no remorse to those taking it from us.

There have been many smaller obstacles and pitfalls mixed throughout as well, a couple of them recent. And a couple of big ones as well, which I won't yet go into.

The past 9 months, I must say, have been the most difficult of my life. That is saying a lot, considering everything I've been through. But this time, unlike past times, it hasn't been one or two things causing havoc, it's been countless things stacked upon each other with seemingly no let up through the course of it.

I am a man of faith, and my beliefs have never wavered, but I must admit that my faith may have a little bit. And hope, at times, seemed a foreign concept to me. I know I have to keep my heart set, and stand upon that faith, which has seen me through many trials in my life. It's just incredibly difficult when it feels as though there is no defense for the onslaught pouring against me.

Still, I know who I am and where I am, and no one needs to tell me that. Others may think they know better, or assume things about my situation or where my place should be. That matters not. What does matter is my own walk, and that is between me and God.

Not to sidetrack, I just wanted to cover my bases as I have no clue who reads this blog. Most that comment are anonymous, which truly says volumes in and of itself. Not about me, but about them.

In any case, today has been a day of frustration, anger, discontent and sadness. Funny that, considering something good happened before all that came crashing down. Though I guess that rings true with the way things work. There's always bad with the good.

Honestly, I just want a fresh start - a clean break. Unfortunately, I'm nowhere near in a position to make that particular dream a reality at the moment. I can't just think of myself, and that's the way it has always been. That's not something I regret, but still it is a burden that has weighed on me at times, and does so now.

I am constantly looking toward change - ways to correct things and set things anew - but it's not nearly as easy as just doing it. I''ve never, ever been one to put myself above others, always looking to do what is right for those around me before myself. It's who I am - who God made me. Sometimes I wish I could be a little more selfish, quite frankly. But it's just not in my nature. Unlike many people I know as it turns out.

Am I bitter? A little, I'll admit. And angry, and hurt above all. But I'm not weak - not by any stretch of the imagination. I have been knocked down more times than I can remember, but never knocked out. I will bounce back, I know that in my heart. I do have faith and even hope that will happen. Even on days like today, when all hope is sapped from me, I find it again. Maybe it's just survival instinct, but no, I know it's more than that.

I wish things were different, sure. I wish I had done many things differently. I'm not perfect, after all. That's not an excuse, just a statement of fact. But I wasted so many years feeling my dreams were wrong or that I was not supposed to follow them, and I was miserable because of that. I won't give up on my dreams, no matter how bleak they seem at the moment. Nor will I conform to others' perception of who I am again as I did in my younger, more naive years. If people won't accept me for who I am then they don't deserve to be in my life.

The bottom line is I need to find a way to remove myself from my current situation, and forge my own new situation. I need to not surround myself with forces that cause me such grief and compile the very emotions I seek to escape at the moment. I just wish I knew how to make that happen - how to change things and quickly. I don't have time for long-term plans at this point. I need a quick miracle, and I jest not.

I have been the recipient of miracles before. Miracles that have saved my home, my family, and even my life. I am a believer of miracles, and I do pray Not as much as I should, but I do. And not only for myself or my situation, but for those around me, those I care about, strangers, and even enemies. It's what I know to do.

Will this bring about my miracle? I can't say. All I know is that I NEED change, and I need it fast. Writing this won't bring that about, I know. But even without divulging details, as always, this process has been therapeutic. I have my release now, and so I can rest.

God bless.

-B

Freelancin' Blues

noreply@blogger.com (Brant W. Fowler) — Fri, 24 May 2013 18:32:00 +0000

I have work. Boy, do I have work. The problem is, I've already been paid for said work. And so I'm constantly having to look for MORE PAID WORK, and thus find myself doing quite the juggling act to stay afloat. And unfortunately, sinking more than floating (which is coincidentally true in swimming too - while I can swim quite well, I never could float, I sink).

It wasn't always this way. Once upon a time, I had a bunch of regular clients with regular, monthly issues, plus other steady work that kept me doing okay. Then a number of things happened that caused all of that to slide WAY down. I got sick - really sick - and eventually had surgery and recovery. During that period, I unfortunately lost a couple of clients. The company I was doing other work for also went out of business during this time. And then the economy took a down-turn and less and less of my regular clients were producing books anymore.

So now, I have a couple of regular clients, and a handful of repeat clients. Seems like just when I'm about to run out, someone contacts me out of the blue as someone has told them about me, and it is always a welcome opportunity for me. But one can not live on those random occurrences with any feeling of financial security.

Right now I face that situation. I was running low this month and an old client hit me up out of the blue. So that will help in the short term. But it's just not feasible for me to keep on at this rate.

So what do I do?

There is a ton of flatting work I have access to, but I'm REALLY slow. Plus lettering pays better when all is said and done - there's just not nearly as much work available for that anymore. So while I do like flatting, and I am good at it, until I get faster (or get a Cintiq or Bosto or whatever), it's not going to sustain me sadly.

I've already said lettering (and logo design) jobs are hard to come by these days. (If you're looking, I am for hire!)

I REALLY don't want to go back to 9-5 - I HATE that lifestyle, I really do. I worked freelance successfully for nearly a decade and LOVED the freedom of it. Going back to 9-5 is a HUGE step backwards for me. If it comes to that, of course I'll do it - what choice would I have? But I have to try to keep my sanity first!

I think writing could be the key. Not just comics, but prose (which I'm getting into seriously very soon - more details on that when I have more to report), articles, whatever. I just really don't know where to start. Sure, I've been paid for writing before - comic scripts, SEO articles, data entry, etc. But I've never tried my hand at like writing for publications or other websites and the like save for a few movie or wrestling reviews.

I will continue lettering - and again, I'm for hire! - but I think writing will eventually take me farther.

In the meantime, I just have to find a way to stay afloat. Things are about to shift around here, and I need something stable. I think I'm going to finally finish revising my website (gonzogoose.com) and start submitting to companies earnestly. But I really do want to look into paid writing jobs out there as well.

Anyone have any tips on that? I am a member of a couple of freelance sites, but most of the jobs I see there are technical writing, which I'm not interested in at all.

In any case, I'm just having a bit of the freelancin' blues as I see bills come in and have to continuously scramble for jobs to keep up. Not a fun way to live, let me tell you.

-B

If There is No Struggle...

noreply@blogger.com (Brant W. Fowler) — Sat, 11 May 2013 23:23:00 +0000

This week has been one of the most difficult weeks I've had for a long, long time for reasons I won't go into here. But the range of areas it affected in my life go from emotional, to physical, to spiritual, and all of those areas were significantly battered and beaten over and over again.

I guess it speaks of my resolve and God's hand in my life that I am able to so casually blog about it in the aftermath. That certainly doesn't diminish the effect these incidents had on me, though. And that has caused me to do a lot of thinking. A LOT of thinking. Thinking about my choices, how my time is spent, who in my life is good for me and who isn't, what things I need to do to change certain circumstances, what I want, what I need... just everything in life in general.

I realize throughout the course of this blog I go through these things that occasionally cause me to be introspective in a random post here. And I typically list all this things I'm battling, either vaguely or right out. And then I always manage to find some shred of positivity to tack on the end of my long-winded diatribe. But let's be honest - there isn't always a visible silver lining, even if there is one hiding on the other side.

This is one of those times. I see everything I've fought against during the course of my life - everything that has brought me to the point I'm at now. I can look at those things and say "if I had done this" or "if this hadn't happened to me" but none of that can be changed, and thinking about those things only adds to the stress and frustration already present. So then I can try to look forward and see what wondrous things await me if I can just get there.

The problem, then, lies within the present. And therein lies the problem. Because I don't see a way out - none that I would consider anyway, and none nearly fast enough to get me the results I so desperately need immediately. So how do you go from point A to point B when you can't see the path?

Some out there will say "through prayer." And that's fine and well. I trust God, I believe in God, and I have prayed my entire life. Prayer has brought me through many a thing. I don't care whether you believe that or not. But sometimes... it's not that I don't think prayer works, or that God's on vacation for this problem. It's just that sometimes God expects us to dig our own way out. And I feel this is one of those times. But I just don't see how.

I know what I want to do, I really do. And it's not what I'm doing right now, at least not completely. There are parts of what I currently do I enjoy (and wish I was getting paid for them), but there are other things I wish I could leave behind and do something else.

Don't confuse this post thinking just because of that last paragraph, though, that this is all about money or work, it's not. There are several things in my life I need changed and need changed fast. I've needed them changed fast for years. And believe me, I have tried and tried and tried, despite what some would tell you who, quite frankly, don't have a clue what they're talking about and have not walked in my shoes.

I am just completely and utterly frustrated about several issues in my life and I just can't see a way through them, around them, over them, under them, etc.

Sometimes in this blog I get a little melodramatic - you might say this is one of those times. For the most part, I really do try to keep my personal struggles out of the public eye. I have a few select friends I vent to once in a while, and I appreciate them for that. But on social media, in front of the camera, on websites and forums, or whatever I try not to do that. I don't like being "that guy." I already feel my professional reputation has been damaged due to circumstances beyond my control that I can't really explain to people, so I certainly don't want to add fuel to that particular fire by being "that guy" across the internet.

This blog, though, is therapeutic to me in times like this. Perhaps I should just keep it private like a journal and not post it to a blog. But there's something liberating about letting the world read what I've written.

I have let down a lot of people in recent times. Not intentionally in the least bit. In fact, I tend to over extend myself trying to do everything and end up falling short. But the past 6 months have been a whirlwind - heck, the past two years have been the absolute hardest years of my life. And coming up how I did and experiencing what I did then, that's saying a lot, trust me. I'm not trying to make excuses, but those let-downs have begun impacting aspects of my life and career and I keep trying and trying to repair them.

The fact is no one will ever be able to walk in anyone else's shoes, not totally. And so no matter how much I explain, sometimes people just don't see it. They can empathize or sympathize, but sometimes they just get tired of hearing it. And that shows they just really don't understand. And that's fine, I don't expect them to. Hopefully they know me well enough and trust me enough to know who I am and how I am.

I don't know if there is a point to all this rambling and jumping around, which I am well aware of that I'm doing. I just know I needed to write. I should be doing other things right now. I should be working. I should be proofreading and revising this before it posts. I won't though. And I'll still work most of the night as I always do, regardless of what people like to believe.

I don't know what the answers are to my situation. And I'm so vague in posts like these that no one reading could possibly offer me any specific advice. I'm not looking for it. I'm not looking for anything really, I just wanted to let it out. Talking to my friends and even my mother just weren't enough this time. I felt I needed to write, and so I am.

Writing. I realized recently that I have always been a writer. I considered myself an artist above all else when I was a kid and a teenager. Then that passion turned to singing as I gained confidence, and that has remained my number one creative passion ever since. In college, thanks to a fabulous teacher, I fell in love with writing, but still considered it second to singing. And I still love singing and music. But I have come to the realization that I have always written in some form or another, and it's what I find the most solace in. The creativity of it; the freedom of it just enthralls me. I am able to express myself in ways through writing I'm just not able to in any other way.

I am honest with myself when it comes to my skills and abilities. I am an okay artist. I have a long way to go, and I'm still not the most creative artist. I am a bit too logical and analytical to really be able to express myself artistically. I am addicted to symmetry, for example, and that's not always called for artistically. And singing, I'm a good singer I think. I'm not a great singer, and I know that. I accept that.

Writing is different, this rambling novel aside. It just comes so naturally for me. When I actually begin to write, I have a hard time stopping. And if I'm writing a story, it just comes to me as I'm typing.

I don't know where I'm going with any of this. It's one random statement after another, and I have now gone beyond rambling into near babbling. So I think it's time to call it quits for this post and move on to something else.

Before I do, though, let me just close with this: I am frustrated, and I am emotional. I'm kind of a mess right now, anyone close to me will tell you that. I try to keep it together, and I try to keep all the pieces moving. I am finding happiness where I can, and that comes in the form of podcasting and comics right now, I'll be honest. Those are the things that are keeping me sane at the moment. Getting to talk with friends about like passions. But I'm also struggling. I'm working towards several things, trying to make several dreams happen, all the while trying to keep my head afloat and it's hard. It's beyond hard, it's nearly impossible given all the factors I am currently dealing with.

So while I am not looking for anything from anyone reading this in terms of comments, advice, or even a kind word, I will ask for one thing though. Send thoughts and/or prayers my way. I can always use those.

I have gotten a lot of support from people in recent months. Some old friends, some new, and some total strangers that appreciate the things I do. I appreciate and thank all of you, sincerely, from the bottom of my heart. Without you all I honestly don't know if I could have made it through my most recent struggles.

And with that, I bid you farewell until the next random post at some future date and time.

-B

No NaNoWriMo

noreply@blogger.com (Brant W. Fowler) — Tue, 27 Nov 2012 02:06:00 +0000

Hey everyone, I'm sad to say that I didn't get it together to do NaNoWriMo this year yet again. :(

I really wanted to, but time just kept getting away from me. And now on the 26th I don't think it would be wise to attempt to write a 50,000 word novel in four days. lol

Next year I'm going to be ready for it for sure. I wish things had worked out this year, and I greatly appreciate all the support I received encouraging me to enter it. I'm sorry I let you all down.

-B

Getting Ready for the Holidays

noreply@blogger.com (Brant W. Fowler) — Sun, 11 Nov 2012 05:28:00 +0000

Today was a day of searching for missing garland, finding out it was in the one tote I didn't look, hanging said garland, testing lights and just having a good time with the family.

No, Thanksgiving isn't here yet, but yes, decorations for Christmas are starting to go up. There's just no time to do it up for Thanksgiving this year, so Christmas stuff will be up just a little bit longer this year.

This is all at my aunt's house, where we have Thanksgiving and Christmas for the whole family (30 people this year, give or take - it's been up to 50 or so in past years), and they go all out bringing the spirit and feel of the holidays to warm the household.

I don't always get along with my family, and I'm sure we get on each others' nerves. But I do love them, and they I, and the holidays tend to pull that out a bit more. It's a time of year we all love very much and really get into. In the past, I've posted photos of the holidays with my family.

So today went a long way in getting me into the spirit of things. I was feeling the love, feeling the magic a little bit. Lord knows I could stand to skip Thanksgiving dinner, but having missed the past two years with my family due to various reasons, health being a major one, I am looking forward to this year.

2012 has brought me a lot of heartache and hard times to be sure, so I am ready for my favorite time of the year and to end the year on a good note. I can taste the pumpkin pie and hear the Christmas carolers already!

-B

I Want a Cintiq!

noreply@blogger.com (Brant W. Fowler) — Sat, 10 Nov 2012 03:15:00 +0000

I would so love to have a Cintiq. If you don't know what that is, check this out:

http://www.wacom.com/en/creative/products/pen-displays/cintiq

I'd love to have the 24HD one or at least the 22HD one. But yep, they cost more than my computer did! Guess what I'll be adding to my Amazon Wish List?!

Speaking of, I was a little surprised to find that neither Amazon nor eBay had them any cheaper. Not that I could afford even a used one at the moment, but still.

I think it would come in incredibly handy for flatting work, and I wouldn't mind trying to do some digital drawing on it too. Not sure if it would be good for lettering, but definitely for logo design work.

I have at least one friend that has one and I must admit I'm jealous. lol

One of these days... that would be a great tool in my work for sure.

-B

To NaNoWriMo or Not to NaNoWriMo

noreply@blogger.com (Brant W. Fowler) — Fri, 09 Nov 2012 05:38:00 +0000

So here we are eight days into November and I have yet to decide if I will do NaNoWriMo or not.

For those unaware, NaNoWriMo, or National Novel Writing Month, is an event that happens every November where writers commit to write a 50,000 word or more novel by the end of the month. Generally, this involves writing every day during November.

As I said, I've missed over a week of this already and would have a lot of ground to cover. I have wanted to do this for a few years now, but I usually forget about it until November is already here. So it keeps passing me by.

This year was sadly no different. Due to some personal issues, I didn't remember it again this year until November 2nd. But then, after asking some people on Facebook and Skype, I decided I'd do it. The problem is I got extremely busy the past week and have yet to start, even though I did sign up for an account on the 3rd.

Another problem is I have no idea what to write about. I mean, I have several novel concepts at various stages, but I don't really want to use those on this They all require some research or planning, and for this I kind of want to just come up with something and wing it at this point. I'm still trying to decide exactly what to write about.

At this point, I'd have to write about 2,300 words per day to reach the goal. That measures out to about 11 pages a day. Given my workload, I'm just not sure that's possible now.

If I do decide to go ahead and do it, I'll update here with a link to my project page. If I don't enter, I am definitely doing it next year.

I love writing, and I rarely get a chance to write these days. I'm always working doing lettering and flatting, or posting on CR, or podcasting, so there is very little time for writing left. And that's why NaNoWriMo is so important to me - it kind of forces me to do what I love.

Keep checking back for updates. I'll make a decision by tomorrow.

-B

Today, I'm Not a Fan of Yours

noreply@blogger.com (Brant W. Fowler) — Sat, 06 Oct 2012 15:16:00 +0000

How much bad news can one receive in 24 hours? I won't attempt answering that as I don't want to bring more on myself than I've already gotten.

Today has been wrought with bad news after bad news, and bad attitude after bad attitude. And it's only 11am!

I'm in a pretty bad situation at present, and the events of late last night and this morning have done nothing but compound the situation into something dismal. So I am not a fan of this day in the least bit.

You know, most people love the weekends, Saturday in particular, because it's a day of rest, away from the job, and they're able to just relax and enjoy it.

Me, I work every single day, no reprieve. And yet I have very little to show for it. Doesn't seem right, does it? But work isn't even the problem. I still typically enjoy Saturdays. I usually make time to watch a movie, I podcast with some friends, and I, yes, work. But my work is fun, so while it does get monotonous and dreadful at times, it's still fun work.

But when you have a cloud of bad news and bad attitudes flooding down on you on top of an already dire situation that you see no way out of, well, let's just say it makes the day a little less enjoyable.

I pray things lighten up for the remainder of the day, or that I'm able to simply drown everything out. Because right now I just want to scream or hit something. It's days like this I really wish I had a punching bag. heh

So, today, hurry up and go away. Maybe tomorrow will be better, or at the very least more bearable...

-B

Contemplative

noreply@blogger.com (Brant W. Fowler) — Wed, 03 Oct 2012 21:25:00 +0000

This morning on Facebook I posted that the day was ripe for productivity. And it started off that way... for about half the day. Then I ran out of steam and kind of just wasted time for a while.

My days aren't over in a 9-5 slot, and usually see me up into the wee hours of the night, so there's still plenty of time for productivity. But I can't help but chuckle at the lack thereof presently that sees me blogging instead of working. :)

One thing about wasting time is you''re left with your thoughts. And today has been that kind of day for me. Sometimes being left with one's thoughts isn't necessarily a good thing, but for me today it was neither good nor bad, it just was...

I have been thinking a lot about my life lately. Sometimes I'm looking forward, other times I'm stuck ten years in the past. That wasn't the case today, it was more along the lines of taking a look at my life and trying to figure out what exactly I want out of it.

I am a creative and passionate person, so there are always ten dozen things I want to do at any given time. There are multiple areas I have some talent and skill in, and many times I want to produce in all those areas at once. Obviously that doesn't and can't really happen, but the desire is still there.

All the same, I often wonder if the choices I've made have put me on the correct path. And I'm talking strictly career here, not spirituality. I know that path, and I know where it lies for me. That's a whole other topic I'm not trying to touch on right now.

Bottom line is, if I'm being truly honest with myself, I'm not doing what I am most passionate about and what I love the most. I enjoy what I do, and I have fun with it. I don't intend on stopping, but at the same time there just has to be more for me.

I have never wanted to be average and live an average life. I'm not necessarily looking for fame, but the monotony and complacency of the average person doesn't appeal to me. I've been down that road many times. I've followed paths others wanted me to and I was miserable. And I'm not talking your general "I hate work" misery, I'm talking completely unhappy and hating every waking moment misery.

There are people in my life that don't understand that - that don't understand me, and never have and probably never will. And I'm not saying one doesn't have to make sacrifices and do what they don't want to do at times. Believe me, I know a thing or two about sacrifice. But at the same time, I won't ever be satisfied by that existence like some can or choose to be. It's not me - it's not who I am.

So, I've really been contemplating where to go from here. I'm at a crossroads right now in more ways than one. There is change being forced upon me, leaving me in a pretty bad place quite frankly - one with little hope at the moment in fact. And while I don't see a way out of that particular situation I still find myself trying to figure out where I'm going.

I know what I want, and I know some ways to try for it. But there are still huge obstacles in my way. I just have to figure out just how passionate I am about certain dreams, how much I'm just going through the motions with others and figure out a plan of attack.

So I guess in a way, the latter half of this day has been productive in a manner of speaking after all. Not productive in terms of actually accomplishing tasks and goals like the first half of this day was, but productive at trying to work things out for the near and distant future.

As you can surely tell, I have been quite contemplative today, and I gather I will continue to be for a while.

-B

Deadline Days

noreply@blogger.com (Brant W. Fowler) — Thu, 20 Sep 2012 10:15:00 +0000

Man, I need to stay on top of things a little bit better I think. Deadlines have been creeping up on me more and more in recent weeks. Good thing I work well under pressure!

I've had a lot going on and have been dealing with a lot in both my professional and personal life. So once again this blog has gone silent. Sorry about that. Just the way it is right now. One of these days I'll get back to the dailies.

Today's going to be a busy day and I've already been up all night. But as long as the work keeps coming in I'll be thankful and take the stressful deadline days as they come.

My deadline today I was just reminded of a couple of hours ago, so that aforementioned stress factor is kicked into high gear right now. But I got this!

Seriously, I actually do work better under the gun like this. I tend to procrastinate anyway, but with everything I've been dealing with of late it's just made it hard.

I've also been working on multiple projects simultaneously, and inevitably one is going to get shuffled to the back for unintentional reasons. When that happens I momentarily freak out, then I suck it up and get busy, and get it done.

Just to toss in a quick update, my mom is doing well. She's recovering quite nicely and is almost back to her normal self as far as being up and active. There are still occasional nights where the pain from the surgery hits her hard, but she's a fighter and she's handling it like a champ.

Anyway, I just wanted to toss up a quick post to remind everyone this is still here and not vacated like other things in my life soon will be (don't mean that to be cryptic, just those in the know will get that).

Back to work then, I have a deadline!

-B

Craziness

noreply@blogger.com (Brant W. Fowler) — Mon, 10 Sep 2012 08:47:00 +0000

I apologize for not posting more... I want to, but life is just kind of a mess right now. If I told you everything that was going on with me it would make your head spin, trust me.

This has been a crazy few months. My mom had a big cancer scare and major surgery, but she's recovering fine and completely cancer free, praise God. I''m moving somewhere, though not sure where. I've had computer issues, and all that just barely even scratches the surface.

Bottom line is I'm under a ton of pressure right now, and I just don't have much time to collect my thoughts, let alone write them down. I promise I will eventually return to consistent blogging, but I couldn't tell you when that will be.

Until then, it'll just be these random short posts, or most likely random short posts on Facebook instead.

Besides, there haven't been any monumentally interesting things happening in my life to talk about, and again, I haven't had time to get all philosophical or introspective lately. heh

Know this: I still love God, I still love music and singing, I still love comics, film and television, I still love my family and friends, I'm still working ALL the time, and I still try to stay as positive as I can be, which isn''t always easy, believe me! So I'm still the same person, I'm just going through a lot. Be patient with me.

-B

There Are Miracles

noreply@blogger.com (Brant W. Fowler) — Tue, 24 Jul 2012 17:48:00 +0000

One week ago today began a very trying and scary week for me and my family. My mother went into the ER around 3am last Tuesday morning for stomach pains she had been dealing with for some time. Me and three of my aunts all had our gallbladders out over the past few years, and her symptoms sounded a lot like ours. So we all assumed that's what it was.

They ran a bunch of tests, but all her blood work and vitals looked good. They gave her stuff for her stomach and sent her home while waiting on ultrasound test results to come through.

Late last Tuesday afternoon the hospital told her they found something and that she needed to get to a hospital immediately. So she went to the nearest hospital to where she was at the time, which was in Lexington at UK. After waiting for about 3-4 hours she finally got taken back.

At about 2am I got the call from my aunt who was with her that they did more tests and found a mass, and that it was ovarian cancer. Needless to say we were all distraught. We lost my Nana and my aunt, both on my mother's side to cancer in the past. My little brother, 20, lost his dad when he (my brother) was only 3 months old. Not to cancer, but my point is he's already lost one parent he never really got to know. He was angry.

The next few days were filled with lots of questions, confusion, anger and sadness.

They ran a biopsy on Wednesday, but it was going to take two days for the results to come back. In the meantime, they drained 4 liters of fluid from her stomach and more from her lungs. I saw her on Thursday and she was mostly in good spirits, believing in God that she was going to be okay. After all, ovarian cancer is treatable and there's over an 80% rate of survival after treatment. There were a couple of times she broke down, but that was more her not wanting Zach (my brother) and I seeing her like this. She was scared, but more angry.

The doctor came in while I was there - or one of them anyway - and told us all the other tests so far had shown negative for any cancer. She did have a mass and her gallbladder was in fact causing problems as well, but no cancer yet. The biopsy was the big test though.

The next day, we finally got the results from the biopsy... no cancer! We were cautiously optimistic at that point, praising God, but knowing that they could still find something. They decided to do another biopsy on Monday just to be sure. If they found something, they'd put her on chemo for three months. If they didn't, they'd do surgery to remove the mass and the gallbladder and also to make sure they didn't miss anything.

So the weekend was a long one. We were very confident she would be fine, but still, there was that tiny bit of trepidation given they were still concerned enough to run more tests. Granted, they were just being thorough, but still, I personally wanted to prepare myself mentally either way.

Finally, Monday came along. I talked to mom Monday morning as she was waiting to be taken down for the biopsy. She was eager to get it over with. Finally around noonish they took her down. I didn't get another report until around 3 or so. The second biopsy also proved negative!

And they took her right into surgery from there. There were actually two masses they removed, and her gallbladder. And none of it was cancerous! The masses were caused by her fibroid.

I talked to my aunt at the hospital around midnight last night and mom was still pretty out of it. So I've yet to talk to her since surgery as I type this, but hope to see her soon. She has no cancer, and now the masses and the gallbladder which were giving her so much trouble are gone. She'll be home by the end of the week!

There was a LOT of prayer going up for her. Many friends of mine who don't even necessarily believe in God, or are at the very least not religious were praying and sending their thoughts. And of course all of us who do undoubtedly believe were praying. There were many, many people praying for my mom.

We were told without doubt that she had cancer. In fact, the first doctor that saw her told her she had cancer and she was going to die. My God is greater than any doctor, though, and my mom is now cancer free!

I don't care what you think or what you believe, I know a prayer was answered, and I know God has a plan for my mother. There are miracles, and we just had a big one. Thank you, God, and thank you to all of my friends and family that sent out your prayers and positive thoughts, or just simply your support. God bless

-B

Knights of P.O.W.E.R.

noreply@blogger.com (Brant W. Fowler) — Wed, 04 Jul 2012 06:29:00 +0000

My friend (and the artist on my comic, Wannabez) has started a Kickstarter project for a series he has wanted to get out to the world for years called Knights of P.O.W.E.R.

He has some really cool incentives for those who pledge, so if you'd like to check it out, see the embedded box below. And here's the description for the series:

Five survivors of tragedy have joined together to save others. This is their calling... This is their power.

Ten years ago, the Journeymen, in an effort to save their youngest member Skyblaze and New Jersey, managed to defeat and possibly kill their worst enemy Valence... but in the process sacrificed themselves. Nowadays, a grown-up Skyblaze and his girlfriend Gel operate as heroes and meet others inspired by the Journeymen. Tech Enforcer, who lost his son to senseless violence, acts as a mentor for Sapphire Red and Steelglove, two heroes with very painful pasts.

Preventing a political assassination brings the five together to form the Knights of P.O.W.E.R. Despite the tragedies each of them faced in their own lives, they refuse to be considered victims and provide hope and strength by example. Working together, they share some of their most closely held secrets in order to help each other... and also to survive the return of Valence, who plans to use their powers against them so she can kill the last of the Journeymen and their legacy.

-B

Comic Related Con

noreply@blogger.com (Brant W. Fowler) — Sun, 01 Jul 2012 05:07:00 +0000

Well, not exactly, but sort of.

One of my partners in ComicRelated.com, and the founder of said site has, along with his partners in another company, Pandora Promotions, purchased Derby City Comic Con!

So, the last week of June 2013, Derby City Comic Con will continue, but under new management, and will serve as the home base con for Comic Related!

We have joked and contemplated about a Comic Related Con for years now, and this brings it to fruition.

There are still a ton of details to be released in the coming days and weeks, many of which I don't even know. As I mentioned, Chuck purchased this technically outside of Comic Related, but has teased it since day 1 as a Comic Related connected thing. So we'll see exactly what plans he and Pandora have for the con soon.

We will be recording a podcast very soon talking with Chuck about all those details.

Regardless, it's a pretty cool and pretty big happening for Comic Related!

-B

Big CR Announcement Coming

noreply@blogger.com (Brant W. Fowler) — Fri, 29 Jun 2012 18:53:00 +0000

Comic Related, the comic news website I co-own, is making a big announcement this weekend. We've been teasing it for a little while now, and the time has finally arrived for the reveal.

Watch this thread for the news to break, or the main site for a press release about it in days to come. We'll also be doing podcasts talking about it.

http://www.comicrelated.com/forums/index.php?showtopic=11939

It's a pretty big deal for CR, so stay tuned...

-B

eBay Listings

noreply@blogger.com (Brant W. Fowler) — Thu, 24 May 2012 16:02:00 +0000

Hey folks,

I have over 70 items listed currently on eBay I need to sell, and fast. I'm having to move and need to sell these both for the money and to have less to lug with me when I leave this place.

I think everything I've listed so far is brand new, most factory sealed or never read. The only things used are the few DVDs and PS2 games. All the other items (mostly graphic novels, some prose books and other collectibles) are brand new, and fairly priced.

So please take a look around and see if there's anything you like.

http://www.ebay.com/sch/gonzogoose777/m.html?_nkw=&_armrs=1&_from=&_ipg=&_trksid=p3686

I'll be listing more stuff as I have time in the days to come. I added 20 items this morning alone.

Thanks!

B

Looking for an Art Team

noreply@blogger.com (Brant W. Fowler) — Sat, 19 May 2012 12:57:00 +0000

I just finished writing a short story for inclusion in the print edition of the Zone 4 webcomic adventure strip. It's a fun, humorous story that I had a ton of fun writing. I'm in need of an art team for it. Here is the "ad" I've been posting around about it:

I am looking for an art team (penciller, inker and colorist) for a short 8-page story that will be included in the print edition of the Zone 4 webcomic as an extra. The script is already finished, and reference for characters will be provided.

The Zone 4 webcomic is an adventure series based on the likenesses of the cast of the long-running weekly podcast of the same name. The first webcomic story, which is now complete, can be read in its entirety here:

http://www.zone4podcast.com/webcomic

The 8-page short in question is a full-format comic story featuring some of the friends of the podcast as spoof characters of a certain mainstream superhero team. It is comical in nature, but all styles will be considered.

I sadly can not pay for your services, and believe me I wish I could. However, I am willing to trade services if that's something that would appeal to you. I letter (Image, Arcana, etc.), design logos and of course write.

I can also offer some sort of exposure for your talents on http://www.comicrelated.com, a popular comic news site I co-own. Be it a spotlight, interview, whatever.

All-in-one and individual disciplined artists will be considered.

There's no tight deadline on this. We are hoping to get the book published this Fall, but beyond that it can be worked on around your other work.

If you are interested, please email me at gonzogoose @ brantfowler.com with the subject "Zone 4 Art Submission." Serious inquiries only please.

Thanks!
B