Goodbye to the Dad that Can't...

Thats better...

2007-10-09T14:11:00.000+01:00

So last night was my week 4 weigh in. A 6lb loss made me a happy chap . That takes my loss to 2 stones and 5lbs now. I have to say that is more than I expected in 4 weeks.

The trick now is just to keep up that 5-6lb loss every week. The LLC tries to encourage us to look at things in monthly blocks but I can't help focussing in on the weekly figures.

Anyway I have just finished lunch (the new peanut crunch bar - a great improvement) and have a hard afternoon ahead so I will sign off.

All the best

Nick

Well that's the first milestone achieved...

2007-10-08T10:37:00.000+01:00

Today is a big day for me. Today is the day I shall look back on when as one of the most important in my weight loss journey. Why is today such a big thing? Well today is the day that not just one person, but actually two people have commented that I have lost weight. I've had comments before but each time it has been from someone that knows I am on the diet. These two people didn't and it means a great deal to me. I've always been the sort of person who thrives on praise and recognition and I feel so bloody good now. Thanks to those whose kind words have given me such a boost.

Tonight is weigh in and I am a bit nervous about it. It needs to be 5lbs plus, please, please and several more pleases! I have stuck to plan and have upped my walking over the last week. I have to say that I can already tell the difference just from my increased capacity to walk without muscle pain. Another thing, from day 1 of the diet I have completely stopped snoring. The fact that it was from so early in the diet makes me feel it isn't just weight related. I know that dairy products can increase phlegm etc. and I drank a lot of milk, often immediately before bed. Anyway whatever had helped me is certainly getting me a better nights sleep. My wife is chuffed too!

So fingers crossed for the weigh in and I shall post results here tomorrow.

All the best

Nick

Spitting my dummy out

2007-10-03T11:51:00.000+01:00

Hi

Its been a few days since my last post. Candidly I didn't have too much to write about so instead of boring the reader to death I haven't bothered to post.

Monday was my 3rd weigh in. I have of course stuck rigidly to plan and was fully expectant of a 6 or 7lb loss. Stepped on the scales, closed my eyes and heard the magic words of "4lbs loss". "What?" was my disappointed reply, surely the scales are wrong! "No" came back the firm retort. My innner voice then told me that it was obvious that the LLC had developed some form of dyslexia or had clearly lost her ability to count. As far as I was concerned that was all more likely than me, king of all weight loss, only having lost 4lbs! Well unfortunately (should be fortunately but you know what I mean) none of those things were true. I had only lost that amount. I am ashamed to say that I pretty much sulked my way through the next 24 hours.

I've had nice messages of support on Minimins and they all cheered me up. My wife then did her best to make me feel good about it and all of that has had the effect that was intended. I am now just on 2 stone loss in 3 weeks and I am very proud. However it is so typical of me; I am utterly extreme in all I do and it is something I need to work on. I have to accept that I won't be losing half a stone every week because I don't want to be spitting my dummy out too regularly.

So a big thanks to everyone that left me an encouraging comment.

All the best

Nick

A real test

2007-09-26T11:36:00.000+01:00

Yesterday I left for work feeling really good. The 9lbs loss was all I could think about and I had a big smile over my face; it soon dropped. 40 miles from home I realised that I had forgotten my food packs for the day. It was bad enough that I had to go all day without them but on top of that I was going to football that evening straight from work and wouldn't get home until 11pm. How was I going to survive? What if the team lost and I was depressed and hungry?

Well the beauty of this diet is that I just didn't feel hungry; not once. The day passed, my team won the match and I arrived home at 11:03 and made myself a veritable feast of Toffee bar and double Raspberry shake.

Its such a contrast to a normal day with football at the end of it. Yesterday I consumed 500 calories. Previously that would have been at least 4,000.

I am already noticing that I can walk more easily and my fleece felt very comfortable last night instead of tight. It's working and I am so in the zone now.

All I want now is for someone who doesn't know I am on the diet to mention my weight loss! When that happens I think I will have to have a celebratory Ginsters....oops Toffee bar :-)

Cheers

Nick

Weigh in news...

2007-09-25T10:50:00.000+01:00

So last night was my second weigh in. I had had a good week in terms of abstinence but strangely I just felt that I wasn't going to have lost that much. So I stepped on the scales, closed my eyes and hears "9lbs"! I am delighted with that, really delighted.

I found the weekend very hard this time. It's not that I'm hungry it's more that I am missing food. Previously I would travel home on a Friday and I'd be looking forward to my takeaway, KFC at football and a roast on Sunday. It's actually amazing at how much food dominated my life (and still does). Not having that enjoyment took its toll on Saturday and I have to admit to being a bit grumpy and a bit stressed by it. It soon passed though and I feel a million dollars today.

I will have to come to terms with the 'loss of enjoyment' factor and I think that it will be replaced with other things over time. On Saturday I think I was almost grieving over food; like it had died and gone away for ever. Weird.

Anyway football tonight. Come on lads please win; don't force me into KFC ;-)

Cheers

Nick

Taste buds

2007-09-20T10:25:00.000+01:00

Hmm, something strange is going on. My taste buds seem to be changing on a daily basis. Last week I really enjoyed the two Caramel shakes I had so I thought I'd get a few more in for this week. Double shake last night, utter filth. Same has occurred with the Thai soup. Come on taste buds give me a break.

I read on minimins that new flavour bars are coming next week. That represents a ray of hope for me as I don't like any of the existing ones and the thought of not chewing anything for 6 months does leave me somewhat deflated.

I know I am only 10 days in but I am finding it relatively easy going at the moment. Sure I have times when all I can think about is Nando's chicken or 100 weight of Sweet and Sour Chicken but those thoughts soon pass. I picked up a useful phrase on Mike's blog (www.mylighterlife.co.uk): "Do I want this food more than I want to be slim?". If I even start to think about food I just ask myself that question, it certainly seems to be working as a method for abstinence at the moment.

Everyone who knows I am on this diet has been really pleased about my first week's weight loss and the encouragement is very welcome. But strangely I have already had people saying things like "but surely you'll take Christmas off" and "don't do it for too long". I know that people are only trying to be nice but I know myself that unless I get to the end in one swoop then my chances of success will be reduced. So 6 months of abstinence it is, hard but in return for the extra years I'll get its a small price to pay.

All the best

Nick

First weigh in

2007-09-18T09:40:00.000+01:00

So last night was my first weigh in. I hadn't weighed myself at all during the week but I had an idea that it was working as my waist and chest were both a couple of inches smaller. So I stepped on the scales and was delighted to have lost exactly one whole stone! I wasn't lacking in motivation anyway but I have to say I was given another big boost by that. I know that a big loss is expected in the first week and that it will get smaller but it is a great step forward.

So all in all a good start; long may it continue!

Cheers

Nick

A religous experience (of sorts)..

2007-09-17T09:38:00.000+01:00

Well something happened to me on Saturday that confirms to me that there must indeed be a God. I have come to this conclusion as I have definite proof that the Devil exists and therefore if the Devil exists the God must do also. "What's the proof of the Devil's existence?" I hear you cry. Well simply this: the lighter life nut crunch bar. Nothing but the most malevolent influence in the universe could have concocted such a thing. I was so looking forward to chewing something and my hopes for food enjoyment were dashed in one mouthful. I guess you are now under the impression that I didn't enjoy my first bar!

I was also proud of my resolve on Saturday. I travelled with my football (and eating) partner and watched my team lose at home. Normally the grinding and gnashing of teeth would have been accompanied by ridiculous quantities of terrible food to try and soften the blow. Not this time. I reckon that is the first match I have been to in five years when I did not indulge in an eating frenzy, and I'm pleased as punch.

Tonight is my first weigh in. I have kept to plan completely so I am hopeful of some encouraging news. I'll post an update tomorrow with the result!

All the best

Nick

I'm obsessed with food

2007-09-14T10:12:00.000+01:00

Last night was hard. I just couldn't stop thinking about food. I wasn't hungry at all but every waking moment seemed to be spent thinking about food. I tried to distract myself but even when watching the maginficent Heroes I was still thinking about Bacon Sandwhiches instead of Saving the Cheerleader (in joke for Heroes fans).

Anyway I didn't sway and I tucked in to a Mushroom soup and a Hot Chocolate. I have to say I really like the soups.

My wife said that she thought my tummy was smaller this morning. I know it was just encouragement but its still nice to hear and is just an example of how supportive she is being. She has taken to doing no cooking when I am in the house and prepares and eats all of her and the kids meals when I am not there. I'm very lucky to have her.

Today is day 4 and tomorrow I can have a bar! Oh yeah baby a whole bar! The thought of chewing is strangely very appealing to me.

Can't wait for the weigh in on Monday. I haven't stepped on the scales at all so far as I have found it can be counter productive.

All the best

Nick

The first test...

2007-09-13T09:37:00.000+01:00

If you were to mention my name to someone that knows me they would undoubtedly think of two things, 'big' and football. In fact when it comes to me the two things are linked in that my very regular trips to watch football matches are my worst time for gluttony.

I've asked myself why this is, and here are the reasons:

1. I seek emotional comfort from food. My team on the whole makes me unhappy because they are talentless and therefore I eat. In fact I would go as far to say that after a particularly depressing away game that chilled food cabinets at garages and service stations quake with fear at my imminent arrival.

2. I try to alleviate boredom with food. See above.

3. The guy I travel with is also a big guy and the shackles come off when we're together. There's no shame in 2 pasties, family bag of wine gums, several donuts and banana milkshakes when I am with him.

The problem is that football plays a very important role in my life and I will always go to the games very regularly. This area of my life is actually going to be my first and biggest test. Come Saturday I am going to put myself in the lions den; no failures this time though, I want to be slim too much.

Anyway day 3 today and my first experience of the caramel shake; it wasn't too bad at all. Still have a headache but don't feel as bad as I did yesterday.

All the best

Nick

1 down, many to go

2007-09-12T09:53:00.000+01:00

Strawberry for brekky, Thai Chili for lunch, Chocolate for tea and Chicken for supper. Add to that 5L of water and that my friends is day one done. The soups are so much better than the shakes and I can see me paying a swift return to the LLC to swap some.

I have had a headache since 5:30 yesterday and have now developed a bad cold (borderline flu/TB I think). I'm not sure if that has anything to do with LL but I suspect it is pure coincidence.

My boy has asked me why I am not eating anything. "I want to get rid of my big fat tummy" was my reply. He looked at me and said "but I like your tummy Dad!". What a great boy he is. He then went on to ask me why I had got a big tummy and I explained to him that it was due to too much food and too much beer. Being the loyal son he is he explained to me that it was my brothers fault that I had too much beer as he had clearly forced me to drink. I heartily agreed in a very cowardly way.

Its those sort of chats that will actually continue to spur me on. I know now that I am going to be around to continue to have them and to enjoy seeing my kids grow up. Having the mediacal at the Docs has re-assured me that I have not left it too late to do something about the years of gluttony and I am going to make sure that I don't go back to it again. I've just got too much to lose.

I also want to thank someone while I remember. I am sure you will have all read the blog that Icemoose wrote. It was like reading my own life story and had given me such inspiration. Thanks mate.

Good luck to you all!

Nick

The big night

2007-09-11T09:15:00.000+01:00

So last night was the big night; my first Lighter Life meeting.

I ventured there with a great deal of excitement and a little trepidation. I arrived, took my seat and watched the other 5 guys go upstairs for their weigh-ins. Each arrived back downstairs with varying degrees of Cheshire cat like grins. I guess the group had lost nearly 30lbs between them, very inspiring stuff.

My turn came and my counsellor gave me my materials and took my weight etc. Its good to have got that first entry into the book; it feels like I can now start to look forward to the subsequent entries and watch the numbers tumble.

We talked, as a group, about the activities that we do on a daily basis and which of those things are more likely to include over eating. Clearly mine were depressingly high in number. Although I do take personal price that I am able to hold off eating while using the lavatory. Who says I don't have will power?

I have read so many mixed reviews about each of the food packs. I just thought I would go for a random selection and then hone it down from that initial taste. Strawberry was my first packet. I have to say that as the moist strawberry juices flowed over my taste buds I knew that I had made a brilliant decision.......

Anyway, onwards and upwards and bring on the Thai chili soup!

Cheers

Nick

Hello to you all....

2007-09-05T10:04:00.000+01:00

Picture yourself sat on an aeroplane.

As you watch your fellow passengers board the plane and walk down the aisle towards you you start to think of your exciting journey ahead. Its then that you see him. You all know who I am talking about, the fat guy who is sweating and wheezing towards you and is having to walk sort of sideways for fear of breaking everyone's shoulders.

"Oh no, please don't sit here" you think to yourself. You can't help but think it.

Well I'm that guy. And believe me I know that's what you're thinking.

I always feel bad for the poor sod that has to sit next to me. Of course that feeling of guilt only lasted until I could further their discomfort with as much food as the airline could give me.

Well I've had enough of it. In fact I've had enough of everything that being fat has given me and I am determined to do something about it.

I have called the blog Goodbye to the Dad that Can't because that sums me up. I am the Dad that always says he can't. "Dad play football with me", "Dad come on the slide with me", "Dad play rough and tumble with me", it's not that I haven't wanted to, more that I am just not physically able. Of course you might say "well you couldn't have really wanted to enough, or you would stop searching the cake ingredients cupboard for glace cherries when you're bored and you've eaten everything else". Yes, you could say that and I guess it may be true to an extent. But it does hurt to keep saying no, it does hurt to see other Dad's doing all those things.

So my plan is to join Lighter Life. I went for my check up at the Docs yesterday. He was unaware of the specific diet but was very supportive. I got a clean bill of health (although the two strips velcro on the blood pressure arm band did seem to be struggling to meet; must be all that muscle I guess). I hope to start on Monday at my group and I just can't wait.

I know there aren't any guarantees and it is really up to me. But this time I do feel I have got a great chance, mainly because I really want to do it for my kids, my wife and most of all for me. So if you get chance, stop by and read the blog. Your comments will be most appreciated (bar any "get lost fatty stuff", I get too much of that from the kids already ;-)

Thanks

Nick