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New version of Goodwizz Launched

admin@goodwizz.com (GoodWizz) — Sun, 03 Jun 2012 05:19:24 PDT

We are glad to present you the new version of Goodwizz. The website has got improved features for Wall, Algorithm Match, Direct Match, Games and Dating Services. We are working on many new features to be implemented very soon. So keep watching for even more features.

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"I Love You" In 179 Languages

admin@goodwizz.com (GoodWizz) — Wed, 25 Apr 2012 09:27:16 PDT

I Love You in Afrikaans - Ek is lief vir jou
I Love You in Albanian - te dua
I Love You in Alentejano (Portugal) - Gosto De Ti, Porra!
I Love You in Alsacien (Elsass) - Ich hoan dich gear
I Love You in Amharic (Aethio.) - Afekrishalehou
I Love You in Arabic - Ana Ahebak / Ana Bahibak
I Love You in Armenian - yes kez shat em siroom
I Love You in Assamese - Moi tomak bhal pau
I Love You in Assyr - Az tha hijthmekem
I Love You in Bahasa Malayu (Malaysia) - Saya cinta mu
I Love You in Bambara - M'bi fe
I Love You in Bangla - Ami tomakay bala basi
I Love You in Bangladeschi - Ami tomake walobashi
I Love You in Basque - Nere maitea
I Love You in Batak - Holong rohangku di ho
I Love You in Bavarian - tuI mog di
I Love You in Belarusian - Ya tabe kahayu
I Love You in Bengali - Ami tomake bhalobashi
I Love You in Berber - Lakh tirikh
I Love You in Bicol - Namumutan ta ka
I Love You in Bisaya - Nahigugma ako kanimo
I Love You in Bolivian Quechua - Qanta munani
I Love You in Bosnian - Ja te volim (formally) or volim-te Turkish seni seviyorum
I Love You in Bulgarian - As te obicham
I Love You in Bulgarian - Obicham te
I Love You in Burmese - chit pa de
I Love You in Cambodian (to the female) - bon saleng oun
I Love You in Cambodian (to the male) - oun saleng bonv
I Love You in Canadian French - Je t'adore ("I love you")
I Love You in Canadian French - Je t'aime ("I like you")
I Love You in Catalan - T'estim (mallorcan)
I Love You in Cebuano - Gihigugma ko ikaw
I Love You in Chamoru (or Chamorro) - Hu guaiya hao
I Love You in Cherokee - Tsi ge yu i
I Love You in Cheyenne - Ne mohotatse
I Love You in Chichewa - Ndimakukonda
I Love You in Chickasaw - Chiholloli (first 'i' nasalized)
I Love You in Chinese - Ngo oi ney a (Cantonese)
I Love You in Chinese - Wuo ai nee (Mandarin)
I Love You in Corsican - Ti tengu cara (to female)
I Love You in Corsican - Ti tengu caru (to male)
I Love You in Creol - Mi aime jou
I Love You in Croatian - Volim te (used in common speech)
I Love You in Czech - Miluji Te
I Love You in Danish - Jeg elsker dig
I Love You in Dutch - Ik hou van jou
I Love You in Dutch - Jeg elsker dig
I Love You in Ecuador Quechua - Canda munani
I Love You in English - I love thee (used only in Christian context)
I Love You in English - I love you
I Love You in Eskimo - Nagligivaget
I Love You in Esperanto - Mi amas vim
I Love You in Estonian - Ma armastan sind / Mina armastan sind (formal)
I Love You in Ethiopia - afekereshe alhu
I Love You in Faroese - Eg elski teg
I Love You in Farsi - Tora dost daram
I Love You in Filipino - Mahal ka ta
I Love You in Finnish (Minä) rakastan sinua
I Love You in Flemish (Ghent) - 'k'ou van ui
I Love You in French (formal) - Je vous aime
I Love You in Friesian - Ik hald fan dei
I Love You in Gaelic - Tá mé i ngrá leat
I Love You in Galician - Querote (or) Amote
I Love You in Georgian - Miquar shen
I Love You in German - Ich liebe Dich
I Love You in Ghanaian - Me dor wo
I Love You in Greek - agapo se
I Love You in Greek - S'agapo
I Love You in Greenlandic - Asavakit
I Love You in Gronings - Ik hol van die
I Love You in Gujarati - oo tane prem karu chu
I Love You in Hausa - Ina sonki
I Love You in Hawaiian - Aloha au ia`oe
I Love You in Hebrew - Ani ohevet ota
I Love You in Hiligaynon - Guina higugma ko ikaw
I Love You in Hindi - Main tumsey pyaar karta hoon / Maine Pyar Kiya
I Love You in Hmong - Kuv hlub koj
I Love You in Hokkien - Wa ai lu
I Love You in Hopi - Nu' umi unangwa'ta
I Love You in Hungarian - Szeretlek te'ged
I Love You in Icelandic - Eg elska thig
I Love You in Ilocano - Ay ayating ka
I Love You in Indi - Mai Tujhe Pyaar Kartha Ho
I Love You in Indonesian - Saya cinta padamu ('Saya', commonly used)
I Love You in Inuit - Negligevapse
I Love You in Iranian - Mahn doostaht doh-rahm
I Love You in Irish - taim i' ngra leat
I Love You in Italian - Ti amo/Ti voglio bene
I Love You in Japanese - Anata wa, dai suki desu
I Love You in Javanese (formal) - Kulo tresno marang panjenengan
I Love You in Javanese (informal) - aku terno kowe
I Love You in Kannada - Naanu ninna preetisuttene
I Love You in Kapampangan - Kaluguran daka
I Love You in Kenya (Kalenjin) - Achamin
I Love You in Kenya (Kiswahili) - Ninakupenda
I Love You in Kikongo - Mono ke zola nge (mono ke' zola nge')
I Love You in Kiswahili - Nakupenda
I Love You in Konkani - Tu magel moga cho
I Love You in Korean - SA LANG HAE / Na No Sa Lan Hei
I Love You in Kurdish - Khoshtm Auyt
I Love You in Laos - Chanrackkun
I Love You in Latin - Te amo
I Love You in Latvian - Es mîlu Tevi
I Love You in Lebanese - Bahibak
I Love You in Lingala - Nalingi yo
I Love You in Lithuanian - As Myliu Tave
I Love You in Lojban - mi do prami
I Love You in Luo - Aheri
I Love You in Luxembourgeois - Ech hun dech gäer
I Love You in Macedonian - Jas Te Sakam
I Love You in Madrid - lingo Me molas, tronca
I Love You in Maiese - Wa wa
I Love You in Malay - Saya cintakan mu / Saya cinta mu
I Love You in Maltese - Inhobbok hafna
I Love You in Marathi - Me tula prem karto
I Love You in Mohawk - Kanbhik
I Love You in Moroccan - Ana moajaba bik
I Love You in Nahuatl - Ni mits neki
I Love You in Navaho - Ayor anosh'ni
I Love You in Ndebele - Niyakutanda
I Love You in Nigeria (Hausa) - Ina sonki
I Love You in Nigeria (Yoruba langauge) - Mo fe ran re
I Love You in Norwegian - Jeg elsker deg
I Love You in Osetian - Aez dae warzyn
I Love You in Pakistan (Urdu) - May tum say pyar karta hun
I Love You in Pandacan - Syota na kita!!
I Love You in Pangasinan - Inaru Taka
I Love You in Papiamento - Mi ta stimabo
I Love You in Persian - Tora Doost Darem
I Love You in Pig Latin - I-yea Ove-lea Ou-yea
I Love You in Polish - Kocham Cie
I Love You in Portuguese (Brazilian) - Eu te amo
I Love You in Punjabi - me tumse pyar ker ta hu'
I Love You in Quenya - Tye-mela'ne
I Love You in Romanian - Te ador (stronger)
I Love You in Romanian - Te iubesc
I Love You in Russian - Ya tyebya lyublyu
I Love You in Samoan - Ou te alofa outou
I Love You in Sanskrit - tvayi snihyaami
I Love You in Scottish Gaelic - Tha gra\dh agam ort
I Love You in Serbo-Croatian - Volim te
I Love You in Setswana - Ke a go rata
I Love You in Shona - Ndinokuda
I Love You in Sign language - Spread hand out so no fingers are touching. Bring in middle & ring fingers and touch then to the palm of your hand.
I Love You in Sindhi - Maa tokhe pyar kendo ahyan
I Love You in Singhalese - Mama oyaata aadareyi
I Love You in Slovenian - ljubim te
I Love You in South Sotho - Ke o Rata
I Love You in Spanish - Te quiero / te amo / yo amor
I Love You in Sri Lanka - mame adhare
I Love You in Surinam - Mi lobi joe
I Love You in Swahili - Naku penda
I Love You in Swedish - Jag älskar dig
I Love You in Swiss-German - Ch-ha di gärn
I Love You in Tagalong - Mahal Kita / Iniibig kita
I Love You in Tahitian - Ua here au ia oe
I Love You in Taiwanese - Wa ga ei li
I Love You in Tamil - Naan Unnai Khadalikkeren
I Love You in Telugu - Nenu Ninnu Premisthunnanu
I Love You in Thailand - Khao Raak Thoe / chun raak ter
I Love You in Tunisian - Ha eh bak
I Love You in Turkish - Seni Seviyorum
I Love You in Ukrainian - Yalleh blutebeh / ya tebe kohayu
I Love You in Urdu - Mea tum se pyaar karta hu (to a girl)
I Love You in Urdu - Mea tum se pyar karti hu (to a boy)
I Love You in Vietnamese (Females) - Em yeu Anh
I Love You in Vietnamese (Males) - Anh yeu Em
I Love You in Vlaams - Ik hue van ye
I Love You in Vulcan - Wani ra yana ro aisha
I Love You in Welsh - Rwy'n dy garu di
I Love You in Wolof - Da ma la nope
I Love You in Yiddish - Ich han dich lib
I Love You in Yoruba - Mo ni fe
I Love You in Yucatec Maya - 'in k'aatech (the love of lovers)
I Love You in Yugoslavian - Ya te volim
I Love You in Zambia (Chibemba) - Nali ku temwa
I Love You in Zazi - Ezhele hezdege (sp?)
I Love You in Zimbabwe - Ndinokuda
I Love You in Zulu - Mina funani wena

Article Source - http://www.brosia.com/ILoveYou.html

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How to make a powerful dating Profile

admin@goodwizz.com (GoodWizz) — Wed, 11 Apr 2012 10:01:54 PDT

To begin with, you have to be categorical about what you're searching for. Do you really want to find love thru Online or are you searching for a long-term companionship. It is surely your call and there are no wrong decisions to become embarrassed with.

The next thing you really ought to know is that you'll find folks on online free dating who might not be geographically near to you. It makes dating practice rather tricky if not unlikely. If it's the situation you might end up spending much of your time simply for online interactions without being capable of seeing or touch somebody you like. Therefore , it is important to be listed on a well-known free dating internet site with countless members to stop your further failures and worries.

Select free online dating sites, which have enough associates in your neighborhood, your region or bordering areas. This is actually the easiest way to boost your percentages of meeting the ideal date and to work out whether or not that connection has a chance. One more thing to consider is whether a site offers interests groups to find people with similar pursuits to yours.

What to do once you've already found the right free dating internet site? First of all you need to pick is user name. Make sure that your user name is truly one off and shows something concerning your unique persona. An ordinary user name might not be able to trap people's interest and there is a high possibility of you being unseen. employ your creative head to create some appealing and intriguing user name. As an example, 'chocoholic ' will offer an excellent idea of your love to chocolate. 1 or 2 bad examples could potentially be 'sarah4love ' or 'sarahcares'. These user names appear suspiciously the same as online scammers.

Next, commit your effort and time in writing a superb profile. Significant is to make convincing strap line together with introduction, that may leave an optimistic perception of you. It is very important to spend some time on intro. Overview in the introduction must be easy to read, not very long and intriguing or snappy to make other visitors to trust and believe strongly in you. After, making a profile you are prepared to hook up. Send messages to the potential girl/beaus. Nevertheless, you must only get in touch with the people that are trustable; and never release your finance details to any person.

The next thing you really ought to know is that you'll find folks on online free dating who might not be geographically near to you. It makes dating practice rather tricky if not unlikely. If it's the situation you might end up spending much of your time simply for online interactions without being capable of seeing or touch somebody you like. Therefore , it is important to be listed on a well-known free dating internet site with countless members to stop your further failures and worries.

Select free online dating sites, which have enough associates in your neighborhood, your region or bordering areas. This is actually the easiest way to boost your percentages of meeting the ideal date and to work out whether or not that connection has a chance. One more thing to consider is whether a site offers interests groups to find people with similar pursuits to yours.

What to do once you've already found the right free dating internet site? First of all you need to pick is user name. Make sure that your user name is truly one off and shows something concerning your unique persona. An ordinary user name might not be able to trap people's interest and there is a high possibility of you being unseen. employ your creative head to create some appealing and intriguing user name. As an example, 'chocoholic ' will offer an excellent idea of your love to chocolate. 1 or 2 bad examples could potentially be 'sarah4love ' or 'sarahcares'. These user names appear suspiciously the same as online scammers.

Next, commit your effort and time in writing a superb profile. Significant is to make convincing strap line together with introduction, that may leave an optimistic perception of you. It is very important to spend some time on intro. Overview in the introduction must be easy to read, not very long and intriguing or snappy to make other visitors to trust and believe strongly in you. After, making a profile you are prepared to hook up. Send messages to the potential girl/beaus. Nevertheless, you must only get in touch with the people that are trustable; and never release your finance details to any person.

Article Source - http://www.articlesonlove.com/marriage/how-to-make-a-powerful-dating-profile.html

Goodwizz advices everyone to complete your profile and other related details to help find the right friends and match for you!

Five tips for staying out of the Friend Zone

admin@goodwizz.com (GoodWizz) — Tue, 27 Mar 2012 07:06:09 PDT

If your relationships constantly sway toward the platonic rather than the romantic, then, sorry to say it, but it's probably because of something you're doing. Luckily, it is possible to get out of the Friend Zone, and stay out for good: It takes a bit of bravery and just the right amount of physical contact. Some tips:

Ask him/her out right away: When you meet someone you might be interested in, time is of the essence in terms of establishing whether your relationship will be platonic or romantic. For shy people, the natural tendency is to slowly get to know the other person, even if your attraction is instant. But this is how people get stuck in the Friend Zone: They wait too long, then get to the point where any possible chemistry or attraction has (d)evolved into a comfortable, platonic friendship.

If you think you want to go on a date, ask them out right away. If you find there's no chemistry on the date, it's easy to develop a friendship from there. But turning friendship into romance is much harder.

Don't be too subtle: It might be painfully obvious to you that you have an enormous crush on someone in your friend group, but trust me, there's a good chance he or she has no idea. People who frequently get stuck in the Friend Zone are often extremely subtle flirters — unfortunately, eye contact and "a good connection" does not a flirtatious exchange make.

Odds are you're not coming on strongly enough (or at all). If you like someone, let them know you like them! It's worth risking potential rejection or embarrassment — you'll never get the romantic attention you want if you don't send out the signals.

Don't act goofy/self-deprecating: If you learn one thing here, let it be this: Everyone wants goofy friends. They just don't want to sleep with them.

I know, it's tough if your natural inclination upon meeting new people is to act goofy and funny so you'll endear yourself to everyone. This works — for friendships. Although humor is attractive, constantly making disparaging jokes about yourself or acting like the class clown does not make people think, "I have got to sleep with this person, the sooner the better."

Goofy is lovely, funny is charming. So save those qualities after you've landed a date. When you're first meeting someone, focus instead on friendliness and allure.

Don't be too available: A surefire way to land yourself permanently in the Friend Zone is to be completely available to the other person, with your emotions and time. Soon, you're the one he or she is texting when they're bored, or inviting out when they have no other plans. You'll feel like you're getting somewhere with this person and may think that if you just continue platonically dating, one of these days he or she will look at you across the table and suddenly realize that they're in love with you.

Except it very rarely works that way.

In truth, they're just biding their time with sweet, comfortable you, while thinking of that other person who is slightly unattainable. If you like someone, give them the option of dating you, or don't spend too much one-on-one time with them at all. They'll be forced to consider you in a romantic light, and if they turn you down, trust me: It's so much better than being helplessly strung along.

Establish physical familiarity: A good way to inch your way out of a Friend Zone is to slowly establish physical familiarity.

Think about someone you like; does the thought of touching them seem awkward or impossible? Then you need to work on becoming comfortable with casual physical contact. Start small: Put your hand on their back, rest your head on their shoulder. It's not so weird for friends to have that level of physical rapport, right?

If you put your head on his or her shoulder, and that person reciprocates by putting an arm around you, and pretty soon half an hour has passed and no one has moved, and things progress from there … well, you're well on your way to being out of the Friend Zone for good.

Article Source - http://articles.chicagotribune.com/2012-03-13/features/sc-fam-0313-avoid-friend-zone-20120313_1_friend-zone-friendship-attraction

Goodwizz is all dedicated turning friendship in to long lasting love and much more. Come join 113K members waiting for you. Joining Goodwizz is free, fun and exciting! Visit us at http://goodwizz.com

How To Kiss A Girl - Tips On How To Kiss A Girl For The First Time

admin@goodwizz.com (GoodWizz) — Mon, 12 Mar 2012 10:21:24 PDT

Many if not most girls decide right after kissing a guy for the first time whether they are ever going to kiss him again in the future. Your first kiss does not have to be perfect but if you're seen by your partner as a bad kisser it may be the first and last time you get to kiss her.

How To Kiss A Girl Step By Step:

Step 1. Make sure she is ready and willing to kiss you.

Trying to kiss a girl at the wrong moment or someone that is not into you can be very embarrassing! Pay attention to her body language. Unless she is very nervous she should give you some subtle signs that she wants you to kiss her or won't mind if you kiss her.

Step 2. Break the touch barrier.

It's much easier to kiss a girl if you have already established some physical contact with her such as holding hands. Don't be afraid of briefly touching her arm or hand casually while talking and see how she reacts. If it doesn't make her feel uncomfortable she may be ready to kiss you.

Step 3. Lean in for the kiss.

Make eye contact with her and lean towards her. Tilt your head slightly to avoid you bumping noses and close your eyes just before your lips touch her lips.

Step 4. Kiss her upper or lower lip.

Start by kissing either her upper or lower lip and be very gentle.

Step 5. Deepen the kiss.

If you feel comfortable and she is responding well to you kissing her, tease her lips with the tip of your tongue and wait for her to slightly open her mouth. When she opens her lips insert the tip of your tongue into her mouth and caress her lips and tongue with your tongue.

Do's And Don'ts:

Look after your personal hygiene. Smelling of sweat does not make you smell "manly" and will not make her feel like kissing you. In addition, make sure your breath smells fresh and that your hands and fingernails are clean.

Look after yourself. She won't mind that you have a zit on your face but make sure your lips are not dry or chapped. Nobody likes kissing dry or chapped lips.

Don't wait for her to make the first move. It's normally up to the guy to make the first move. Girls like guys that are confident so if you feel like kissing her and the time is right just go for it.

Make sure she is ready to kiss you. Even if you think you're the best kisser in the world, she will not agree if you try to kiss her when she is not ready for it.

Kiss her in private. You don't want people staring at you while you're kissing her. If it does not make you feel uncomfortable it may make her feel awkward.

Know when to stop. The fact that she is ready and willing to kiss you does not mean you may grope her. Girls do not like to be groped! And, don't try to see how far you can push her. Treat her like a lady and with respect.

Don't feel restricted to kissing her on the mouth only. Most girls love to be kissed in the neck. In fact, some girls prefer a guy kissing their neck to a guy kissing them on the mouth.

If you follow the above tips on how to kiss a girl you will have nothing to worry about and your first kiss should be a memorable one.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/6878967

Goodwizz wishes its users happy and memorable encounters. Visit and join Goodwizz at http://goodwizz.com to connect to 112K Members and counting! Its Free!

How to Impress Someone on a First Date

admin@goodwizz.com (GoodWizz) — Mon, 05 Mar 2012 05:45:31 PST

Have you been wanting to go out with someone for a while but are so nervous when they finally say yes that you don't know how to act or what to do? If so, read on for some basic advice on impressing your date.

1. Before the date do something that relaxes you, exercise, reading, yoga, singing your favorite song, whatever puts you in an easy going, happy mood. Wash yourself, put on antiperspirant/deodorant, brush your teeth, brush your hair, and don't forget to wear clean clothes! Make a list of conversation starters and questions you can ask them if you're having trouble finding a topic. Questions about their pet(s), taste in music, good books they've read lately, favorite thing to do outdoors, would you rather questions, are all good ideas. Remember these and read the front page of the newspaper, too.

2. If you are taking your car, clean it out! Bad environment = bad date. Same goes if they are going to come over.

3. Choose someplace that will be special to your date. If you're not sure what he or she will like, ask. You may want to take him or her out to eat someplace out of the ordinary (don't go overboard, as this can set a bad precedent).

4. If it is a formal date, greet him or her with a small gift. For example, a small box of chocolates or a single rose. This is even better if you know what types of flowers or candies are your date's favorites. Never try the single red rose on a casual first date, you may come on way too strong, as this signifies passionate love. Try baking a nice treat, getting a small stuffed animal, or something else that is unique to them. Never do anything big on the first date. The best gift you can give is your company.

5.Communicate openly and honestly. Talk to your date during dinner and listen to what he or she has to say.

6.If you are a guy, pay for the date, if you are a girl offer to pay for the date, if your offer is declined, offer to pay for yourself, if this does not fly, accept. They are trying to be nice. If you are a gay/lesbian couple, just ask them what they prefer to do and explain what you prefer to do and then compromise. A lot of gay/lesbian couples run into this problem because both sides want to pay for themselves, the best bet is to either take turns paying or pay for yourself.

7.Ask questions about the life of your date. Do a lot of listening, it's important not to over-chat them, try to listen a little more than you talk, but don't let the conversation just die out.

8.Look into your date's eyes. Eye contact shows interest.

9.If you are confident that you have a sense of humour and intelligence, make them laugh. But don't lecture.

10.Pay your date compliments, compliments are your best friend when dating, don't overdo it or offer anything insincere, try not to be too cheesy. Find one or more qualities in which to sincerely compliment them.

11.Do something unusual and cheap, something you had to think about and put time into. Don't do anything huge, just go for a stroll in your neighbourhood or offer them cocoa, show them your favorite constellation, something interesting that you alone will be remembered for.

12.End the night with a kiss, if possible. As you escort your date to their place of residence shift the conversation to something romantic like the moon, or the stars or something. Use visual cues and body language from your date to let you know when the time is right to "make your move".

Tips

Don't wear overpowering perfume or cologne, but do wear some. It makes a statement.

Wear suitable attire, but don't overdress or compete with your date for fashion attention.

Try watching a chick-flick and picking up a few tips from it, these movies are completely formed around people's idea of the perfect dating relationship so use them to your advantage. The corny dialog might not be your favorite, but it will give you an idea of what is deemed as impressive.

Be natural. Be yourself. Don't make everything you say a line from a TV show or sound very rehearsed. Let whatever happens, happen. You'll never really get to know each other otherwise.

Warnings

On average, it's best NOT to stink of body odor, though there are exceptions. Most are turned off by evidence of poor hygiene

If you are dining, don't open your lips while chewing, or talk with your mouth full of food. Most find this disgusting and it will ruin their meal and impression of you. If you have difficulty with this, try smaller bites.

Table manners. Use them.

Don't come on too strong. Don't play incredibly hard to get. Strike the happy medium, the not desperate but not distant. Friendly and 'flirty' are a good combination.

If you make an obvious mistake and both of you know what happened, don't try to cover it up.

Be sincere is apologize and express you'd like to fix the problem. They will normally be okay.

Article Source http://www.wikihow.com/Impress-Someone-on-a-First-Date

Goodwizz wishes everyone a fantastic First Dates. We Welcome you to visit and Join us at http://goodwizz.com and find the Perfect Date. Its free to join 112K members!

Pair celebrate friendship with 100-mile walk

admin@goodwizz.com (GoodWizz) — Wed, 29 Feb 2012 05:27:48 PST

THIS summer, they will have been best friends for 50 years.

Now, Stephen Cochrane and Stephen Hawkins will celebrate their long-standing friendship with a 100-mile walk for charity.

By setting up the Friendship Walk, they hope to raise money for nearby good causes and inspire other people to recognise their friendships in the same way.

They are planning to walk the length of South Downs Way, stretching from Eastbourne to Winchester between Monday, July 23 and Sunday, January 29 – the same day as the opening of the Olympic Games in London.

The pair, both now aged 61, met when they were just 12 during their time at Southern Grammar School for Boys in Portsmouth.

They have been best pals ever since.

Mr Cochrane, 61, from Hylters Lane, near Chichester said: ‘We both sat down and it dawned on us that we had been friends for 50 years this year, and thought we had better find a way to celebrate it.

‘Then we thought of doing a walk, and it seemed silly not to raise money for charity at the same time.

‘There must be people out there who wish to celebrate their friendships, whether they have spanned two years, or 82 years.

‘It’s about people getting out and about, getting exercise and recognising their short or long-term friendships.

‘This potentially could get hundred or even thousands of people involved in the Olympic celebrations while at the same time raising thousands of pounds for charity.

‘I believe that this could be of national interest and could ultimately be the community event of this Olympic year.’

The pair want people to take on Olympic events such as running, swimming, cycling, sailing and horse racing which can be arranged alongside their walk.

The charities which will benefit from the friendship walk are Fieldfare Trust, Cancer Research UK, Leukaemia and Lymphoma Research, and the National Brain Appeal.

Mr Cochrane added: ‘We have both had friends who have passed away with cancer, and I have had a friend who needed brain surgery.

‘We also wanted to raise money for Leukaemia Research in memory of a colleague’s daughter, as well as the Fieldfare charity.

‘There are a lot of elderly people out there who lack access to the beautiful countryside.’

Article Source - http://www.portsmouth.co.uk/news/pair_celebrate_friendship_with_100_mile_walk_1_3570526

Goodwizz endeavours to create good and long lasting friendship among people of all age groups. Visit and join us at http://goodwizz.com. 112K members and counting. Its Free!!

How to Impress a Girl on Phone

admin@goodwizz.com (GoodWizz) — Mon, 20 Feb 2012 12:05:22 PST

Sometimes men try too hard to impress a girl on phone and they forget the basic simple things that can guarantee them success when it comes to impressing beautiful girls. If you are one of those men who can successfully get a woman’s number but miserably fail to get a date, then continue reading the dating tips below. I am about to unleash the rules of how to impress a girl on phone, stay focused:

Step #1 Building up your own confidence and self-esteem

Congratulations you got her number. At least you can tap yourself on the back, you've managed to get a beautiful woman’s number and she is interested in you.

Now man up and be confident about whatever you say to her. Impress her by talking about your achievements, your job and if you do not have any of those then try to impress her by talking about your good qualities. Whenever you feel nervous, remember there are millions of single women out there you can date online and offline.
Women are not impressed by men who cannot even have a simple conversation and flirt with them on the phone – if you do not want to be considered as a loser, start by not talking like one.

Step #2 Act Natural on the phone

You've heard it million times before and yet you cannot understand the basic logic behind this advice. When a man likes a woman, he finds himself in this powerful urge to impress her. As he has no idea on how to impress a girl on phone, this makes him act unnatural and can clearly be seen in the way he talks, for example he will try to impress her by saying only ‘cool things’ and things that she wants to hear. The moment that he notices she does not like something; he will quickly take back the things he said and try to give it a new dimension. Believe it guys, women know when you are trying too hard to impress them.

Step #3 Use a flirty and playful tone

No I am not saying you need to talk like Jason Stratham. A flirty tone is something that you can develop with practice.
First of all practice a sexy hello. And whenever you flirt on phone, speak slower than you normally do and keep the same flirty and sexy tone, pause at the right spots and let the conversation take its natural direction-perhaps paving your way to her bedroom!

Step #4 Flirt with her and compliment her

Don’t use your flirty tone to tell her about how sad you are to learn about the Japan triple disaster! Flirt with her and tell her how much you love talking to her, compliment her voice and let her know that you cannot wait to see her again – let her know that you are not here to be just a friend, you are looking for more than friendship!

Step #5 Listen to her and show interests in her

Don’t just brag about yourself and try to impress a girl while you flirt on phone by telling her about your past sexual conquests – this is the perfect recipe for disaster. Take the time to listen to her, show interests in her, learn more about her while at the same time tell her things about you and how many things you have in common.

Step #6 Do not lie to her

The biggest mistake made by men who don’t know how to impress a girl on the phone is lying. Keep in mind the classic saying “A liar should have a good memory”. Do not lie to her; a connection which is made based on a lie never lasts long. Always tell her the truth, women appreciate honesty.
If you can master the above dating and flirting tips, you can be sure that you will double your level of success to get a date. Always bear in mind that success comes with practice and experience. So don’t give up yet. Sometimes you may do everything the right way and still fail to impress a girl; don’t take it personally, learn to move on, there are ways too many single women out there to be wasting time on a specific woman.

Article Source - http://www.howtoimpressagirlz.com/how-to-impress-a-girl-on-phone/

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Merely 40 hours of video gaming 'Can Cure Cataracts'

admin@goodwizz.com (GoodWizz) — Fri, 17 Feb 2012 01:13:37 PST

40 hours of fast-paced action gaming could improve the vision of people born with cataracts, a new study has claimed.

According to a psychologist, surgery and contact lenses do not always work, and people experience visual difficulties into adulthood.

However, some of these effects can be reversed if the individual follows a short course of "game therapy".

"After playing an action video game for just 40 hours over four weeks, the patients were better at seeing small print, the direction of moving dots, and the identity of faces," the Daily Mail quoted Daphne Maurer, a psychologist as saying.

Maurer from McMaster University in Canada has researched how vision develops in individuals born with cataracts in both eyes.

Previous research found that a 40-hour "course" of video gaming could be used to treat "lazy eye" or amblyopia, a brain disorder in which the vision in one eye fails to develop properly.

"Those improvements tell us that the adult brain is still plastic enough to be trained to overcome sensory deficiencies," Maurer said.

Maurer is internationally known for her work on "synaesthetes" - a condition that makes people's brains link different senses.

The study will be presented at the American Association for the Advancement of Science in Vancouver, in a session called 'The Effects of Early Experience on Lifelong Functioning: Commitment and Resilience'

Article Source- http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/life-style/health-fitness/health/Video-gaming-can-cure-cataracts/articleshow/11924482.cms

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What Women Hates about Men

admin@goodwizz.com (GoodWizz) — Thu, 09 Feb 2012 09:31:35 PST

The relationship between men and women has always been a love-hate type. This article will describe what a woman finds most annoying in her partner. Though this is a much debated topic, we know for sure that a woman never likes a man who is weak or shows too much of interest in her initially. Similarly there are many points that psychologists have tried to analyze. It would be very easy to put it down in a few simple points, but perhaps it is best to debate this topic by asking questions. How would you feel if you see your man with another woman enjoying a cup of coffee at the coffee shop around the street corner? Chances are, you would feel a sense of jealousy, even if the woman is just an office colleague who just wanted to feel a little relaxed. This is just an example and hundreds more can be cited. Any relationship can survive just on one sentence ’Trust me and I will never let you down’ If you really mean it, this can be the foundation of any statement.

Many Psychoanalysts often point out that women often contradict themselves while expressing what they desire and do not desire in men. Though women publicly admit that they like men who are strong, secretly they like a man on whom she can wield certain amount of power. Well for all the men reading this article, the Billy Joel song ’She is always a woman for me’ is how we would love to define her. No matter what, men will always enjoy the company of women. Let me now bring out certain points which women definitely find annoying in a man. Imagine your boyfriend calling you up every 15 minutes, when you are in the middle of a busy road. Regardless of how much you love your partner, this can become very irritating, as you would feel you are free to be on your own, due to the constant phone calls.

Now imagine you are on a first date and he starts talking about the amount of money that he has made in the stock markets or the new Ferrari that he has bought. I am sure more often than not a woman would not like to hear about these things on the first date. While do talk about what they do for a living on first dates, it is usually considered annoying and ruse for someone to brag about their earnings.

It is also likely (majority of the times) that a woman would not like a person who would show insensitivity towards her feelings. This is a mistake that many men make and women do not like this attitude from them. There are many other factors that women generally do not like in men such as arrogance, lies, submissive behaviour, etc. Never ever show a woman that you have a weak character. This is one of the traits that women dislike in a man. It is a mistake that many men make by making a woman feel that he is ready to fall at her feet. Contrary to a man’s thinking that a woman would appreciate it, women get annoyed with men who are too submissive and ready to do anything for her. This does not mean that a woman does not want a sensitive man who is open about his feelings, but it does mean that a woman still wants a man to be his own person, think for himself and claim what he wants from a relationship.

A woman’s relationship with a man is very delicate and she looks for a strong shoulder to rest her head. A woman always likes a man who has a big heart and ready to share and care. A self-centred man is rarely loved by women and more often than not will crave for female company. You are setting yourself up for failure, if you show undue interest in other women when you are with a woman. This is a behaviour that women dislike and will definitely put her off. Manipulative attitude is something that women dislike in a man. Hence, try to be as open in your behaviour as possible and at the same time do not fall prey if she displays manipulative behaviour. Keeping these points in mind, you can win over a woman. Remember that love blossoms slowly and you need to give your woman time and space if you really want to win her over. We have tried to explore few points that make a woman annoyed with a man. There may be many more and hence it is always advisable that you always be yourself when you are on your initial dates.

Article Source - http://www.love-sessions.com/what_women_hate_about_men.htm

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The Power of Love

admin@goodwizz.com (GoodWizz) — Wed, 01 Feb 2012 08:35:40 PST

Love is as critical for your mind and body as oxygen. It's not negotiable. The more connected you are, the healthier you will be both physically and emotionally. The less connected you are, the more you are at risk.

It is also true that the less love you have, the more depression you are likely to experience in your life. Love is probably the best antidepressant there is because one of the most common sources of depression is feeling unloved. Most depressed people don't love themselves and they do not feel loved by others. They also are very self-focused, making them less attractive to others and depriving them of opportunities to learn the skills of love.

There is a mythology in our culture that love just happens. As a result, the depressed often sit around passively waiting for someone to love them. But love doesn't work that way. To get love and keep love you have to go out and be active and learn a variety of specific skills.Bottom of Form

Most of us get our ideas of love from popular culture. We come to believe that love is something that sweeps us off our feet. But the pop-culture ideal of love consists of unrealistic images created for entertainment, which is one reason so many of us are set up to be depressed. It's part of our national vulnerability, like eating junk food, constantly stimulated by images of instant gratification. We think it is love when it's simply distraction and infatuation.

One consequence is that when we hit real love we become upset and disappointed because there are many things that do not fit the cultural ideal. Some of us get demanding and controlling, wanting someone else to do what we think our ideal of romance should be, without realizing our ideal is misplaced.

It is not only possible but necessary to change one's approach to love to ward off depression. Follow these action strategies to get more of what you want out of life—to love and be loved.

Recognize the difference between limerance and love. Limerance is the psychological state of deep infatuation. It feels good but rarely lasts. Limerance is that first stage of mad attraction whereby all the hormones are flowing and things feel so right. Limerance lasts, on average, six months. It can progress to love. Love mostly starts out as limerance, but limerance doesn't always evolve into love.
Know that love is a learned skill, not something that comes from hormones or emotion particularly. Erich Fromm called it "an act of will." If you don't learn the skills of love you virtually guarantee that you will be depressed, not only because you will not be connected enough but because you will have many failure experiences.
Learn good communication skills. They are a means by which you develop trust and intensify connection. The more you can communicate the less depressed you will be because you will feel known and understood.

There are always core differences between two people, no matter how good or close you are, and if the relationship is going right those differences surface. The issue then is to identify the differences and negotiate them so that they don't distance you or kill the relationship.

You do that by understanding where the other person is coming from, who that person is, and by being able to represent yourself. When the differences are known you must be able to negotiate and compromise on them until you find a common ground that works for both.

Focus on the other person. Rather than focus on what you are getting and how you are being treated, read your partner's need. What does this person really need for his/her own well-being? This is a very tough skill for people to learn in our narcissistic culture. Of course, you don't lose yourself in the process; you make sure you're also doing enough self-care.
Help someone else. Depression keeps people so focused on themselves they don't get outside themselves enough to be able to learn to love. The more you can focus on others and learn to respond and meet their needs, the better you are going to do in love.
Develop the ability to accommodate simultaneous reality. The loved one's reality is as important as your own, and you need to be as aware of it as of your own. What are they really saying, what are they really needing? Depressed people think the only reality is their own depressed reality.
Actively dispute your internal messages of inadequacy. Sensitivity to rejection is a cardinal feature of depression. As a consequence of low self-esteem, every relationship blip is interpreted far too personally as evidence of inadequacy. Quick to feel rejected by a partner, you then believe it is the treatment you fundamentally deserve. But the rejection really originates in you, and the feelings of inadequacy are the depression speaking.

Recognize that the internal voice is strong but it's not real. Talk back to it. "I'm not really being rejected, this isn't really evidence of inadequacy. I made a mistake." Or "this isn't about me, this is something I just didn't know how to do and now I'll learn." When you reframe the situation to something more adequate, you can act again in an effective way and you can find and keep the love that you need.

Article source - http://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/200212/the-power-love

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SOCIAL NETWORKING COULD HELP SAVE AMPHIBIANS

admin@goodwizz.com (GoodWizz) — Mon, 23 Jan 2012 09:03:39 PST

HARNESSING THE FACEBOOK GENERATION’S PHOTO-SHARING HABITS COULD HELP TRACK AMPHIBIANS AROUND THE WORLD.

BY NAOMI LUBICK

You’ve surely heard how tweeting has connected birders through the social media site Twitter. Well, champions of amphibians are linking up the same way. These creatures are disappearing at alarming rates around the globe, from salamanders losing their forest habitat in Central America to frog populations worldwide threatened by a deadly fungus called chytrid. About a third of all amphibian species face extinction. Even as some species vanish, researchers are enlisting the public’s help to find them—and map their locations through an online social network called the Global Amphibian Blitz.

The online portal, hosted by iNaturalist.org and cosponsored by the Smithsonian Conservation Biology Institute, among others, allows people to upload their photos of frogs, salamanders, and their cousins, tagged with geographic locations. Posters can sign on through Facebook, Google, or even Twitter. Hard-to-identify creatures are flagged with question marks; users, experts, or site curators can then attempt to ID them.

So far the resulting map of amphibian sightings has logged photos capturing more than 500 of the 6,000-plus species across the planet—even one, Holdridge’s toad (pictured above), that was presumed to have gone extinct in 2008. The scientist who posted that sighting intentionally used false coordinates in order to protect the population, which highlights some of the problems of relying on a social network to do science. Just as on Facebook, people can lie about their identities, or the origins of their amphibian photos. “It’s pretty much open source,” says Vance Vredenburg of San Francisco State, a cofounder of the project who studies emerging infectious disease in amphibians. But the network also has “powerful checks and balances” from regular users—just like Wikipedia.

Despite its imperfections, the effort could possibly prove priceless. Citizen scientists can be the eyes and feet on the ground for professional herpetologists, who have limited funding and people power, Vredenburg explains. For his own research, Vredenburg fully expects that someone will report a population of yellow-legged frogs that survived chytrid but his team missed. Clues to how such populations handle the onslaught might help researchers save other amphibians.

Article source- http://www.audubonmagazine.org/articles/conservation/social-networking-could-help-save-amphibians

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What a Positive Outlook in Life Can Do for You

admin@goodwizz.com (GoodWizz) — Mon, 16 Jan 2012 10:03:13 PST

Aside from assisting you attain your goals, an optimistic disposition in life also permits you to forge meaningful relationships and touch other people's lives. However, it may be quite easy to utter that you will probably be a positive person. However, being sincerely positive in life is another matter than simply saying that you are going to be one. Do you genuinely practice positivity? Are you now wondering how this could be applied in your everyday life, not just in small measures, but in a constant, habitual way?

Acknowledge the Negative.

Most people get the wrong concept that optimism indicates getting devoid of any negative thoughts or feelings. That would be utopia, with no more room toward development. Being positive entails acknowledging the negative, but not surrendering to it. Naturally, undesirable notions can nonetheless spring up within your mind, concerns will worry you, and distressing recollections can generate feelings like anger and loathing. As an alternative to containing them, just acknowledge and accept them as they are, and insist that they will not damage your moment. As the saying goes, "Pain is inevitable. Suffering is an option."

Never Compare.

Never compare yourself to others. Indeed, once in a while you might notice yourself swooning at another someone's high-end gadgets or outgoing personality, but do not reach a point where you feel terrible about yourself. Every entity is unique, and you might not have an outgoing personality, but you will be a mindful and thoughtful introvert.

Widen Your Abilities.

As an alternative to dwelling on what you don't have, focus on your talents. Hone them and learn new things. A talent not shared and honed is a huge waste. Life coach programs focus on developing individual's skills as a portion of the procedure to obtain objectives.

Pause.

With everything so loud and all so busy nowadays, peace and quiet has been neglected. No matter how hectic your schedule is, attempt to allot even just several minutes to pause and stay calm. Pray, meditate, recite a mantra within your mind, listen to relaxing music, whatever does it for you. Pausing creates a sense of stability and builds up your intuition, as a professional life coach will most likely agree.

Live in the Present.

Becoming positive is also being elated; however, joy is just not a objective, but a state of being. Although happiness is characterized by elated emotions, it's it really is an attitude of the heart, a choice which you merely make. To be happy indicates to take pleasure in the present moment. According to the works of Eckhart Tolle, the present is all there is, and worrying about the future and gripping to the past blinds you from acknowledging what is here. Taking pleasure in the present is a portion of professional life coaching programs that aid people fulfill private goals.

Joining an Online Dating Site? All Tips No Tricks!

admin@goodwizz.com (GoodWizz) — Thu, 12 Jan 2012 00:36:00 PST

Online dating sites have been around for years now, assisting more than hundreds of partners around the globe to find their one true love.

More individuals discover online dating sites more dependable and fun instead of meeting friends of friends, because in this manner they have a chance to talk and get to know each other before eventually seeing one another.

Since we are talking about how online dating operates and what are the benefits you can get from this, I have listed down some do's and don'ts of online dating.

Tip #1

Do not share your personal or financial details to anyone you have never seen or met before - individuals you don't know or simply just anyone who's not familiar.

Do not send money to someone you just met online, especially wire transfers. Always keep in mind that by using wire transfer the sender doesn't have protection against loss or scammers. In addition, with wire transfer overseas, it is really impossible to reverse the transaction or trace the money after sending.

Do not give your credit card details, or any bank information. I guess that's a no brainer right?

Tip #2

Here are certain things that you may want to pay attention to when interacting with different people online. You may be dealing with a scammer if you are asked for the following details

1. He or she will ask you to talk or chat outside email or any messaging service.

2. He or she suddenly talks about destiny or fate.

3. He or she might state that he/she was recently widowed or left by his or her partner.

4. He or she might demand your address and tell you that he or she might send out some flowers or gifts.

5. He or she may declare that she or he is living in the US but currently travelling, living or working abroad.

6. Lastly, he or she requests for money.

If in case you may come across these strange things, you might want to reject that person and never talk to him or her.

Tip #3

Always bear in mind what your real intentions are when making an account on these online dating sites. You have to always remember that these sites have their pros and cons and it is up to you on how you'll manage yourself given these situations. Finding someone whom you want to share your whole life with shouldn't be expensive. That someone should value, respect and love you for what you are, because that is the most important part of being in love.

Online dating sites should assist you when finding someone you want to share your lifetime with. Let it be your tool to a happy marriage or a happy relationship. Not a tool to having financial problems because you gave your account details to someone you don't know and someone who will abuse you.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/6724866

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Psychotherapy: Love Cures?

admin@goodwizz.com (GoodWizz) — Tue, 03 Jan 2012 22:47:19 PST

Sigmund Freud in writing to Carl Jung said, 'psychoanalysis is in essence a cure through love'. However, the L-word has been avoided in psychotherapy and almost avoided as a four-letter word!

Nevertheless, reality presses home because 'love' has been smuggled into the counselling process using euphemisms such as 'unconditional positive regard', 'transference', 'counter-transference', 'empathic attunement', 'warmth', 'rapport', 'alliance', 'holding environment' and even 'intersubjective field'!

These euphemisms, however, are not to be entirely discounted-even if some rely more especially on being related to a particular form of therapy--for they express various features of therapeutic love.

Not romantic or erotic love: these forms of love are clearly not permitted in therapy (even though a past master of therapy, Carl Jung, became sexually involved with one of his patients who survived the ordeal to become an outstanding psychiatrist herself!). This give and take of 'love' takes place within the confines of a professional healing relationship subject to the ethical standards of the appropriate profession involved.

One way to understand the problems many clients bring to therapy is to understand them as 'love phobias' (Stephen Diamond, 2011). The client is afraid to love another and consequently afraid to be loved in return. Possibly s/he was brought up by a depressed parent who was unresponsive to her cries for attention or for holding if she were hurt. She then 'decides' not to look for love anymore because of the fear of being rejected.

Imagine such a person in a marriage or relationship that requires a flow of love between the two people in order to be an intimate relationship at all. Erich Fromm went so far as to say, that only by loving another can one be loved. Love in this context includes recognition of the uniqueness of the other and full acceptance of that uniqueness.

In this regard it is good to be reminded that Jesus Christ's recital of the greatest commandments both call for Love. First to love God with all one's being and then second to love neighbour as one's self.

But how does one love if one cannot love, if one lacks the love-ability?

We can only learn to love by being and feeling loved and therefore loveable. Despite Fromm's edict that we must love in order to be loved the New Testament has reversed this order by saying that 'we love Him [God] because he first loved us' (1 John 4.19, KJV). We were/are loved by God [first] therefore we love God!

Loving God is a foundation for loving others because others are made in the image of God. Why wouldn't we therefore love others made in His image? Still these words may be just words in an old Bible for some; and that is where psychotherapy may help. For in good psychotherapy the client receives consistent attention, support, acceptance, nurture, 'holding' and caring. The client receives 'love' from the therapist and in return usually experiences love (admiration, respect, honour, trust).

This mutual love dynamic can have a powerful effect upon the client's presenting problem, particularly if that problem is a relationship difficulty. This conclusion follows because overcoming a 'love phobia' means being more able to love and more able to be loved which are the prerequisites for an intimate relationship of quality.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/6735064

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We stop being selfish at 33!

admin@goodwizz.com (GoodWizz) — Thu, 29 Dec 2011 23:39:19 PST

Our selfish outlook takes a backseat when we turn 33 and we start considering others’ feelings more often, a new study has revealed. Researchers at Make-A-Wish Foundation UK, a charity that grants wishes to youngsters fighting life-threatening illnesses, came to the conclusion after studying the attitudes of 2,000 adults aged from 20 to 60. "It's never too early to put other people before yourself," Spokesman Emma Cronin said.

According to the study, when we reach 33, we are also more likely to make an effort with parents and grandparents and take a positive attitude towards ending feuds with family or friends, the Daily Mail reported. The older we get, the more selfless we become in almost all areas of life except volunteering in the community, the report suggested. Most people concur that having kids is the turning point in changing our attitudes towards other people because this is the time when we apparently find ourselves worrying more about others and doing things for them, like checking how they are getting home, offering to help with childcare and doing airport runs.

The study found that 40 per cent of those under 33 admitted being very selfish and putting themselves first in all circumstances. Yet, 40 per cent of this age group often volunteer for charity or their community - higher than any other age group. Researchers found that the age at which we are most selfish is our teenage years, with people revealing that just growing up made them more likely to consider others.

Article Source- http://lifestyle.in.msn.com/relationships/article.aspx?cp-documentid=5682933&page=0

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Top Ten Reasons for Divorce

admin@goodwizz.com (GoodWizz) — Tue, 20 Dec 2011 01:02:00 PST

Some people marry each other, divorce and then re-marry. This sounds ridiculous but it happens and in most of the cases marriage ends in divorce, never to come together again. Most people try to linger on to their marriage. They do not know when to divorce. Let us try to understand the reasons why people want to divorce.
Some frequently cited reasons for divorce:

1. Lack of commitment towards marriage, sexual incompatibility and infidelity

Commitment may be lacking in one of the partners because marriage happens not always out of love. It could be seen as making a good deal and when it is found that the deal is not what he or she expected divorce happens. Besides, people looking for quick solutions cannot sustain marriage for long.

Philandering habits die hard and this leads to infidelity. People with uncontrollable libido or unhappy with his or her partner cannot be loyal to their partners. So when the wife or husband comes to know of his or her partner cheating on him or her divorce turns out to be the answer. The question that arises is when to divorce.

2. Lack of communication between spouses

Without communication no relationship can be effective. Keeping your resentments simmering within, your partner does not come to know what is happening with you and this is likely to create distance between you and your partner.

3.Abandonment, Alcohol Addiction, Substance Abuse

When one of the partners deserts his or her partner for quite some time or a longer period divorce emerges as the answer. One leaves his or her partner because of the latter's bad habits.

Alcohol addiction and abuse prevent marital bliss because of the change in behavior pattern which makes an adverse impact upon mental peace and physical security.

4. Physical Abuse, Sexual Abuse and Emotional Abuse

These abuses are not uncommon and tolerating them is not good and a person who loves himself or herself would not put with such abuses.

5.Inability to manage or resolve conflict

Lack of maturity disables one to manage conflicts and handle personality differences or irreconcilable differences'

6.Differences in personal and career goals

People who cohabit before marriage have higher rates of divorce than people who didn't cohabit before marriage because differences become gigantic in course of time. Initial comfort before marriage was imagined to take things ahead in future but in reality it does not happen.

7. Different expectations about household tasks and financial problems

When expectations do not match it affects relationships most. This leads to personality conflict because none of them are willing to do things or are ready to sacrifice their time and comfort.

Because what one wants the other to do, the other does not do there is dissatisfaction and frustration. In such instances love becomes sour. This exacerbates with financial problems because material needs remain unfulfilled and creates discontent in the minds of both the partners as one cannot give and feels humiliated and the other is frustrated because of long standing inconveniences.

8. Intellectual Incompatibility and Inflexibility

Intellectual incompatibility creates misunderstandings. And the smarter person feels frustrated while the less intelligent partner is mad about not reaching the level of intelligence of the other and makes life miserable for himself or herself and for the others also.

9. Mental Instability or Mental Illness

Insanity does not allow space for normal communication.

10. Religious beliefs, cultural and lifestyle differences

Cultural values clash unless we are highly adaptive in nature. Orthodoxy leads to intolerance and conservatism gags the spontaneity of life. So this leads to divorce after some time of marriage

When a person has a valid reason to divorce, he or she knows when to divorce. After all, there is no point in hanging on to a person. One should take appropriate action and break-off the relationship.

Article Source- http://www.articlesbase.com/divorce-articles/top-ten-reasons-for-divorce-5497400.html

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Rules of Friendship

admin@goodwizz.com (GoodWizz) — Tue, 13 Dec 2011 10:10:08 PST

What are the rules of friendship? What are the guidelines for creating an enriching, productive, and long-lasting friendship? This article answers these questions and more.

A lot has been written about romantic and family relationships but very little about friendship. Why is this? Do friends play a less vital role in our lives?

Most of us approach friendship in a lackadaisical manner as if it is replaceable, temporary, or of less value than family or romantic relationships. Certainly, there is less built-in permanency in a friendship than there is with family members, a spouse, or a committed romantic relationship. But does friendship have a weaker capability to enrich and support our happiness? I would say no. I would also say this is especially true for singles. This is why the rules of friendship are particularly important for singles.

No other people in your life will understand, or sometimes even comprehend, the challenges and benefits of being single than other singles. Family members and friends who have spent most of their lives married will not be able to relate to the struggles and pleasures of being single. This is why friendships with other singles is such a vital aspect to being single successfully. This is also why the rules of friendship are of such importance to being happily single. This is true whether you seeking a partner or not. You will be much more successful in creating a quality relationship with a potential life-partner if you approach it from a position of independence and "preexisting" contentment and happiness.

A few quality single friends can become your family of sorts. They will be the best ones to go to for advice and encouragement on issues related to being single. They might be the ones that you prefer to spend certain holidays with because you all share a common bond and understanding. If you compare this with spending every holiday at a family member's house full of couples, children, and you - the only single adult in attendance - an occasional alternate plan may lift your spirits. Try organizing your own holiday party with your single friends and see how much more fun you have. The ability to have fun with your friends is one of the residual benefits of following the rules of friendship.

If you consider that there are no built-in family or legal ties to support its sustainability, a friendship has certain unique attributes that other relationships do not. Here is a list of attributes that are unique to friendships as compared to family, spousal, and committed romantic relationships. These attributes are not apart of the rules of friendship.

· Friendships can end instantly without any further responsibilities.

· Friendships can last beyond the lifespan of family members and spouses.

· Friendships have no stake in inherence issues.

· Friendships have no stake in career choices.

· Friendships have no legal, social, or monetary obligations that ties them together.

· Friendship are only bound by common interests, shared values, mutual respect, and love.

Rather that present the rules of friendship from the perspective of what a friend should do or be for you, I am going to describe your responsibilities. Since, based on the Law of Attraction, you draw to you and create the type of friendships that you expect and conceive in your mind, it only makes sense to focus on you. Here are the rules of friendship.

Rules of Friendship

· Remain equally loyal in good & bad times.

· Respect the person not the position, title, or assets.

· Always do what you say you will do.

· Never bad mouth a friend to others.

· Keep their secrets a secret. No exceptions!

· Always be an optimist, never a naysayer.

· Always be honest, but never critical.

· Always value and appreciate your friends.

· Always be grateful for your friends. Never take them for granted.

· Always focus on what you appreciate about them, not on what you dislike.

· Consider their point-of-view before trying to get them to see yours.

· Never expect anything. Give what you want to receive first.

· Help without expecting a return favour, but do not do it unconsciously.

· Take a stand in your friendships. Be who you are.

· Do not allow your friends to persuade you to do things that you know are not in your best interest.

· Do not allow your friends to persuade you to violate your morals and principles.

· Do not try to change your friends. Accept them as they are.

· Do not criticize, critique, or condemn your friends.

· Graciously, but firmly, teach your friends how to treat you.

· Maintain your friendships with periodic quality communication by email, phone, and in-person.

· Strengthen your friendships by sharing fun, challenging, and intellectual experiences.

· Let them know how much you value their friendship.

· If you love a friend, have the courage to tell them. (This applies to both men and women.)

If you follow these rules of friendship, you will enjoy many close friendships throughout your life.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/1553128

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HOW TO LET GO OF A PAST RELATIONSHIP: 10 STEPS TO MOVE ON PEACEFULLY

admin@goodwizz.com (GoodWizz) — Wed, 07 Dec 2011 03:56:32 PST

by Lori Deschene

“The amount of happiness that you have depends on the amount of freedom you have in your heart.” ~Thich Nhat Hanh

Nine years ago my heart was in a million little pieces that formed the basis for a million regrets.

I had my first serious relationship in college, when all my insecurities came to a head. My ex-boyfriend had to juggle multiple roles, from therapist to cheerleader to babysitter.

The whole relationship revolved around holding me up. I realized this soon after it ended—that I spent three years expecting someone else to love me when I didn’t love myself. The guilt and shame kept me single for almost a decade.

I dated, but it was always casual. I’d start getting close to someone and then find a way to sabotage it.

Long after I let go of the man, feelings about the relationship held me back. I was afraid of being vulnerable. I was afraid of being hurt. But mostly I was afraid of hurting someone else again and having to live with that.

If you’ve been holding onto an old relationship, now is the perfect time to let go. Here’s how you can start moving on:

1. Practice releasing regrets.

When a relationship ends, it’s tempting to dwell on what you did wrong or what you could have done differently. This might seem productive—like you can somehow change things by rehashing it. You can’t.

All dwelling does is cause you to suffer. When you start revisiting the past in your head, pull yourself into the moment. Focus on the good things in your current situation: the friends who are there for you and the lessons you’ve learned that will help you with future relationships.

It might help to tell your friends to only let you vent for 10 minutes at a time. That way you’re free to express your feelings, but not drown in them.

2. Work on forgiving yourself.

You might think you made the biggest mistake of your life, and if only you didn’t do it you wouldn’t be in pain right now. Don’t go down that road—there’s nothing good down there!

Instead, keep reminding yourself that you are human. You’re entitled to make mistakes; everyone does. And you will learn from them and use those lessons to improve your life.

Also, keep in mind: if you want to feel love again in the future, the first step is to prepare yourself to give and receive it. You can only do that if you feel love toward yourself; and that means forgiving yourself.

3. Don’t think about any time as lost.

If I looked at that unhealthy relationship or the following decade as time lost, I’d underestimate all the amazing things I did in that time. True, I was single throughout my 20s, but that made it easier to travel and devote myself to different passions.

If you’ve been clinging to the past for a while and now feel you’ve missed out, shift the focus to everything you’ve gained. Maybe you’ve built great friendships or made great progress in your career.

When you focus on the positive, it’s easier to move on because you’ll feel empowered and not victimized (by your ex, by yourself, or by time.) Whatever happened in the past, it prepared you for now—and now is full of opportunities for growth, peace, and happiness.

4. Remember the bad as well as the good.

Brain scientists suggest nearly 20 percent of us suffer from “complicated grief”—a persistent sense of longing for someone we lost with romanticized memories of the relationship. Scientists also suggest this is a biological occurrence; that the longing can have an addictive quality to it, actually rooted in our brain chemistry.

As a result, we tend to remember everything with reverie, as if it was all sunshine and roses. If your ex broke up with you, it may be even more tempting to imagine she or he was perfect and you weren’t. In all reality, you both have strengths and weaknesses and you both made mistakes.

Remember them now. As I mentioned in the post 40 Ways to Let Go and Feel Less Pain, it’s easier to let go of a human than a hero.

5. Reconnect with who you are outside a relationship.

Unless you hop from relationship to relationship, odds are you lived a fulfilling single life before you got into this one. You were strong, satisfied and happy—at least on the whole.

Remember that person now. Reconnect with any people or interests that may have received less attention while you were attached.

The strong, happy, passionate person you were attracted your ex. That person will get you through this loss and attract someone equally amazing in the future when the time is right. Not a sad, depressed, guilt-ridden person clutching to what once was. If you can’t remember who you are, get to know yourself now. What do you love about life?

6. Create separation.

Hope can be a terrible thing if it keeps you stuck in the past. It’s not easy to end all contact when you feel attached to someone. Breaking off the friendship might feel like ruining your chances at knowing love again.

It’s helped me to change my hopes to broader terms. So instead of wanting a specific person to re-enter your life, want love and happiness—whatever that may look like.

You will know love again. You won’t spend the rest of your life alone. In one way or another, you will meet all kinds of people and create all kinds of possibilities for relationships—if you forgive yourself, let go, and open yourself up, that is.

7. Let yourself feel.

Losing a relationship can feel like a mini-death, complete with a grieving process.

First you’re shocked and in denial. You don’t believe it’s over and you hold out hope. Next you feel hurt and guilty. You should have done things differently. If you did you wouldn’t be in this pain.

Then you feel angry and maybe even start bargaining. It would be different if you gave it a second go. You wouldn’t be so insecure, defensive, or demanding. Then you might feel depressed and lonely as it hits you how much you’ve lost.

Eventually you start accepting what happened and shift your focus from the past to the future.

You have to go through the feelings as they come, but you can help yourself get through them faster. For example, if you’re dwelling in guilt, make forgiving yourself a daily practice. Read books on it, meditate about it or write about it in a journal.

8. Remember the benefits of moving on.

When you let go, you give yourself peace.

Everything about holding on is torturous. You regret, you feel ashamed and guilty, you rehash, you obsess—it’s all an exercise in suffering. The only way to feel peace is to quiet the thoughts that threaten it.

Letting go opens you up to new possibilities.

When you’re holding onto something, you’re less open to giving and receiving anything else.

If you had your arms wrapped around a huge bucket of water, you wouldn’t be able to give anything other than that bucket, or grab anything else that came your way. You might even struggle breathing because you’re clutching something so all-encompassing with so much effort.

You have to give to receive. Give love to get love, share joy to feel joy. It’s only possible if you’re open and receptive.

9. Recognize and replace fearful thoughts.

When you’re holding onto a relationship, it’s usually more about attachment than love. Love wants for the other person’s happiness. Fear wants to hold onto whatever appears to make you happy so you don’t have to feel the alternative.

You might not recognize these types of fearful thoughts because they become habitual. Some examples include: I’ll never feel loved again. I’ll always feel lonely. I am completely powerless. Replace those thoughts with: All pain passes eventually. It will be easier if I help them pass by being mindful. I can’t always control what happens to me, but I can control how I respond to it.

10. Embrace impermanence.

Nothing in life lasts forever. Every experience and relationship eventually runs its course.

The best way to embrace impermanence is to translate it into action. Treat each day as a life unto itself. Appreciate the people in front of you as if it were their last day on earth. Find little things to gain in every moment instead of dwelling on what you lost.

When I feel like clinging to experiences and people, I remind myself the unknown can be a curse or an adventure. It’s up to me whether or not I’m strong and positive enough to see it as the latter.

Article Source- http://tinybuddha.com/blog/how-to-let-go-of-a-past-relationship-10-steps-to-peacefully-move-on/

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The A-Z of Fulfilling Relationships

admin@goodwizz.com (GoodWizz) — Tue, 29 Nov 2011 10:57:14 PST

The A-Z of Fulfilling Relationships

Great relationships don't just happen. And as we're often reminded, they're the result of hard work, commitment and trust built over a lifetime of interaction. Since there are no short-cuts, it pays to be mindful of the basic attitudes and qualities that create strong, successful marriages, families and friendships. See how you measure up in our list of must-dos and must-avoids!

A = ADJUSTMENTS

Successful relationships are all about adjustment and compromise. The happiest couples will tell you there's no way to forge a lasting relationship without give and take. Adjustments are a necessary part of living together, and it's something both parties need to make. Don't insist on your way all the time or try to force people into behaving how you think they should.

B = BLAME

Pointing the finger of blame is often what we do to deny our part in a conflict. The problem with this is it never solves anything and it nearly always triggers a negative reaction. When you're playing the blame game, you get the other person on the defensive, which makes it difficult for him or her to think rationally about what you're saying (even if you've got a valid point!) and respond in a positive manner.

C = COMMUNICATION

Good communication is the foundation of all healthy relationships. Make an effort to communicate rationally and be sensitive to the other person's point of view, feelings and state of mind. Don't forget communication involves listening as much as expressing your own thoughts, feelings or views.

D = DESIRE

Contrary to what popular culture dictates, sexual intimacy goes beyond mere physical gratification. So while passion and desire are important aspects of a loving relationship, it's only within the context of marriage (where there is a foundation of real trust, commitment and loyalty) that you will feel truly connected to your partner and genuinely loved.

E = EMOTIONAL IQ

Paying full attention and really listening when someone is talking is the key to identifying emotionally with him or her. Building a close rapport with the important people in your life comes naturally when you learn to show sincere concern for them. As the saying goes, people don't care how much you know, till they know how much you care.

F = FORGIVE & FORGET

Hurt by something a loved one did and can't get over it? If the relationship is worth salvaging, and if you yourself are struggling with anger and bitterness, it's time to try forgiving and forgetting. Cut yourself and your partner some slack. It may be a one-off mistake that he or she committed in the heat of the moment. Resolve the issue and move on - you owe it to yourself.

G = GIVE 100% OF YOURSELF

The more of yourself you're willing to invest in relationship, the more fulfilling it becomes. Your commitment and willingness to work at it, no matter how tough the goings gets, is the most obvious way to build a strong marriage. It will mean sacrifices of time, effort and emotional energy, but the lifetime rewards are well worth it.

H = HONESTY

This is the cornerstone of all successful human relations, whether personal or professional. Without honesty, there is no trust, and without trust there is no growth. Watch your motives, though, and see that honest words are always spoken in a loving manner for the benefit of the other party. True honesty is never an excuse to attack another person's weaknesses or destroy their confidence.

I = INDEPENDENCE

Everyone needs space to grow and evolve, so learn to appreciate other people's individuality. Clinging to a partner and spending every waking moment together may seem romantic at first, but you'll soon find that you need some form of interest independent of one another to keep the relationship fresh and exciting.

J = JEALOUSY

This green-eyed monster rears its ugly head in even the best of relationships, when the insecurity is not addressed at an early stage. Jealousy clouds rational thinking and provokes ugly words or actions that leave lasting scars. While it may be linked to a loved one, it is never motivated by love, but rather a fear of not being loved. Constantly reassuring your loved ones of your affection and devotion helps to keep this damaging emotion in check.

K = KINDNESS

Never underestimate simple acts of kindness in showing someone how much you appreciate and love them. Finding opportunities to do little favors, extend thoughtful gestures and pay heartfelt compliments to those around you keeps you from taking people for granted.

L = LAUGHTER

Take time to laugh and share simple pleasures with your loved ones. A sense of humor is a great tool for defusing tense situations and lightening the pressures of daily life. The most treasured memories often include an element of joy in them.

M = MANNERS

Simple courtesies such as saying 'please' and 'thank you', minding your table manners or putting another's needs before your own are often allowed to slip as familiarity sets in. Politeness and consideration always make others feel valued.

N = NURTURE

Seek to nurture others through encouraging words, sharing in their successes and reinforcing their value and self-worth. The knowledge that someone believes in you and your dreams is a powerful affirmation and it paves the way for deep, meaningful friendships.

O = OPENNESS

Avoid rigid mindsets or expectations which are a sure-fire recipe for disappointment. No one is perfect and we all have quirky traits, so keeping an open, easy-going attitude towards a loved one's peculiar habits, without trying to change them, will save you ( and them) lots of unnecessary stress.

P = PATIENCE

Patience is vital in any successful relationship. It's the one quality that no couple can do without, for better or for worse, and the extent of one's patience can determine how frequently conflict occurs.

Q = QUALITY TIME

Carve out space and time for the special people in your life. Never crowd your calendar with so many activities and social commitments that you fail to factor in quality time with your spouse, parents or close friends.

R = RESPECT

Mutual respect is central to a strong, satisfying relationship. Even if you disagree with another's actions or opinions, you can still show respect for them. As correct or informed as you think you are, never put down or belittle others. Instead, learn to appreciate their unique strengths that complement your own weaknesses.

S = SELF-WORTH

A healthy self-image is important as it enables you to receive love as well as give it. If you cannot love yourself, it is unlikely that you will be receptive to other people's expressions of affection towards you. It can be very frustrating for people to keep trying to convince you of how much they care if feelings of low self-esteem and lack of confidence keep getting in the way.

T = TRYING TIMES

Tough times are inevitable, and can pose a challenge for any couple. Whether it's financial, health-related or an issue of broken trust, these seasons test the true mettle of your commitment to one another. Unless you're in an abusive situation, eliminate the option of divorce or separation from your mind completely. Too often, it's the convenient solution which deprives you of the opportunity to strengthen and deepen your love for one another through adversity.

U = UNDERSTANDING

Being understanding of others comes from putting yourself in their shoes to see why they speak or behave a certain way. Trying to understand their insecurities when they act up, and accepting them as they are without being judgmental builds bridges rather than walls.

V = VACATION

Stressed from the hustle and bustle of city life? Take a vacation with those you love, to rekindle romance or just create memories to treasure.

W = WIDENING SPACES

It begins as a sense that you're drifting apart or from a prolonged difference of opinion, but if you're not careful, you'll soon let go and let the gap between you widen. A few missed calls words left unsaid and sweeping issues under the carpet can all result in a huge chasm. Don't let indifference set in - keep the communication channels open.

X = XTREME MEASURES

Sometimes, it takes tough love to protect the people we love from themselves, such as when there's an addictive habit involved. Caring enough to confront them and taking extreme steps may be necessary to nudge them towards admitting and seeking help with these issues.

Y = YIELDING

A mature love does not insist on getting its own way all the time. And not every subject needs to become a raging debate if you learn to distinguish between essential and non-essential issues. Being gracious and yielding occasionally can promote a healthy give-and-take relationship.

Z = ZEROING IN ON A PROBLEM

The most effective way to deal with any problem arising in a relationship is first to admit that it exists. Avoid generalizations on how bad or impassive the state of the relationship is, but rather take time to reflect and identify specific issues affecting it, and see how these can be addressed.

Article Source - http://herbsforlove.com/hfl/articles/The%20A-Z%20of%20Fulfilling%20Relationships.php

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The Psychology of Friendship

admin@goodwizz.com (GoodWizz) — Wed, 23 Nov 2011 10:38:20 PST

With social networking the very crux of modern virtual living, it is simply not possible to avoid a psychology of friendship. But friendship may not be as simple as it seems as it has got several layers and complexities and friendship can be of many types. Yet friendship like love depends on the single factor of attraction and in this case, it is more of a mental and emotional rather than physical attraction. So when romantic love begins with physical attraction, friendship is more mental, emotional or psychological.

Among maybe thousands of students we meet in school or a few hundred we meet at the workplace, we finally become close and attain a level of friendship with very few or limited people. So like love, friendship also goes through our internal filter and as we choose our lovers unconsciously, even our friends are chosen unconsciously as we intuitively understand who could be our true friends.

Apart from the fact that there is this unconscious and intuitive filter which we exercise when we choose our friends or lovers, we also do get consciously attracted to people with whom we develop long lasting relationships and friendships. This attraction could be sexual but most likely we are attracted to the personality, to someone whose personal style, mannerisms and attitudes seem fascinating, intriguing or simply similar. There could be a narcissistic theory to this as we choose friends who may look, talk or think like we do and usually there is this mental rapport from the very beginning. Just as love could happen at first sight, friendship could also begin with 'like' at first sight.

Now this liking could have several gradations and in some cases you would simply like to remain as contact as in social networking. You simply follow a person on twitter or add someone as friend on face book because there is this basic or unconscious liking or at least a realization that there could be some gain from the virtual relationship. However this is the first superficial layer of friendship just as you would smile at or share a piece of news with a complete stranger in a train without ever keeping in touch or meeting again. This sort of friendship is the 'random friendship' variety.

Most of your social network friends who you do not know would be such random friends and strangers who you meet once and share a random conversation in a flight or a train or a bus would also be such random friends. This is the first layer or stage of friendship and in most cases we do not go beyond this stage. Most people we meet in our lives would be such random friends. This is a friendship of no expectations on both sides. This sort of friendship fulfils our basic social interaction and communication needs. Say for example, you give a speech at a conference and some people ask you questions and you answer them, to you these are your listeners but in this basic interaction there is a sense of rapport and almost an initial level of friendship. These, your listeners who choose to communicate with you are your random friends and they fulfil your interaction and communication needs.

The next stage of friendship is the distal friendship stage is which there is some unconscious or conscious expectation from the friendship and there may be a conscious sexual or emotional attraction. This sort of friendship is with people you regularly communicate with and you are also most likely interested in their activities. Distal friends are people you may or may not meet but are people with whom you want to maintain a long term and meaningful relationship and in most cases you have some knowledge of what goes on in their social or personal lives. This is the second level of friendship and second type of friendship and although there is expectation from this sort of relation, there may not be any clear idea as to what expectations there are. You simply know that you want to remain in touch with such friends and they are more than just contacts. These friends fulfil our power and recognition needs as with such friends we are assured that there are people in the world who care about us and are interested in our lives, dreams and achievements.

The third stage and type of friendship is of close proximal variety and this is the friendship between family members, close school friends, close workmates and friendship between spouses and lovers. In this sort of friendship there could be many expectations and there is sometimes an intuitive emotional connection. The initial reason for friendship could be physical attraction as in spouses or simply emotional connection as with family members or there could be a shared life and shared physical activity as in case of school or work friends. The close or proximal friends would know most details of your life and this sort of friendship entails expectations of sharing which may or may not be realistically possible. For example if sons and daughters leave home to work or study abroad, the parents who are still close friends would expect that their children would talk to them every week and this may not always be feasible. These close or proximal friends or stage of friendship fulfils our basic security, love and safety needs.

Thus from these stages or types of friendship you would know that the most essential types of friends are the close friends followed by distal friends and then random friends. Some individuals have more random friends than others and are thus of outgoing extroverted personality. These individuals are generally more curious about the world, have leadership are more open and communicative, they are also possibly very creative. However their primary needs are for social interaction and communication.

The second type of individual has more distal friends or social contacts with whom they are neither too close nor are they completely aloof. Such individuals have a wide range of social contacts with expectations but few random contacts and they are of mixed extroverted-introverted personality pattern. That means on a scale of 10, their extroversion would be 5 to 7. The primary need for such individuals is power or recognition. Of course this could have varied possibilities as with public or social figures and personalities such as writers, actors or politicians, there will naturally be more random contacts, yet as natural preference some public personalities will prefer social recognition as opposed to social communication. This preference is the basis of their social personality and would define the kind of friendship they choose to have.

The third type of individual is completely introverted and these are poets or artists or simply individuals who like to work on their own and lean heavily on their close network of friends and family members. Such individuals may have limited social contacts and very few random contacts and may not enjoy leadership positions. In some cases their introversion or aloofness would overshadow any leadership skills they do have. Such individuals could be very creative as well but this creativity may lead to complex ideas and highlight the subjective. In this case close friendship which fulfils love, safety and security needs are the primary needs of such individuals and such individuals are more emotion and security, or home and family oriented rather than communication or recognition oriented. From these three friendship patterns it is possible to delineate these three types of social personality based on social interactions.

Of course at the moment this is popular psychology and very little research in social psychology has studied levels of friendship, friendship in social networking or friendship styles that could relate to personality. Yet in the future psychology would not be able to avoid such research and with increased importance of social networking and virtual friendship, psychology will have to study how friendships are formed, why certain people become our friends and why different levels of friendship are attained with different individuals. Although there are theories on friendship and group formation in children, more studies into adult relationship formation and friendship would be necessary in psychology. Research studies will also have to be conducted to determine whether people with more random friends are ever curious creative types seeking communication and whether people with more distal friends and fewer random friends seek power and achievement and whether introverted individuals primarily lean on emotional security. With increased technological possibilities and an ever connected world, friendship remains a very fertile area of study in the social sciences.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/5325602

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How to Talk to Women

admin@goodwizz.com (GoodWizz) — Sun, 13 Nov 2011 01:27:59 PST

by Allen Thompson

By golly, you’ve actually met a woman.

Maybe you’re in bar. Maybe you’re at the gym or Laundromat. Maybe she’s someone you know from work. Or maybe, even, you’re actually out on a date.

In any event, now you’ve got to do something scary, something unpredictable, something with the power to launch a future romantic relationship, or end one before it even gets started. YOU’VE GOT TO TALK TO HER.

What do you talk about? Should you tell her about your childhood, your therapist, your plans for the future, the wart on your big toe? What if you can’t think of anything to say? What if you say the wrong thing? And, by the way, what would be the "right" thing to say? Do you have a clue?

Most guys don’t. When your average gent converses with a woman, he’s basically just flailing blindly at the wind, hoping by chance that something he says will "connect" with the woman and make her fall for him.

Needless to say, this is not the "Don Juan" way of doing things.

You need to have a plan. You need to know DEFINITELY what works and what doesn’t, what to talk about and what not to talk about. You don’t want to leave her feelings to chance or to fate. You want to be charming and in control.

And that’s what we’re going to discuss right now.

Now there are many many aspects of a conversation. This particular article focuses on the conversational TOPICS that you should focus on when wooing a beautiful lady. Those topics which will almost GUARANTEE increased interpersonal attraction. Topics which will leave you in complete charge of the conversation, and which will leave you the option, IF YOU SO DESIRE, of future conversations, dates, or an intense romantic relationship.

Are you getting excited?

Okay, so WHAT exactly do you talk about?

Well, the first thing to remember is that men frequently err by talking TOO MUCH. They often monopolize conversations, droning on and on about topics that bore women to tears. They think they’re "impressing" the women when, in reality, they’re "depressing" the women.

Just because a woman listens to you and acts interested in what you’re saying doesn’t necessarily mean she really is. She might just be acting polite while silently wishing that the date would hurry up and end, or that you would go away... and never come back.

So key number one is DON’T TALK SO MUCH! Try not to monopolize the conversation and try to LISTEN to what SHE has to say. Remember, everyone is incredibly interested in what they themselves have to say. People will talk to you about themselves for as long as you will listen.

So stop worrying about what you’re going to say next. Focus all your attention and energy on listening to what the woman is saying to you. Try to visualize or "feel" what she’s saying.

This does take a little effort. It’s not very hard to do, but it’s not something that men "naturally" do. You simply have to concentrate.

Now when listening you want to pay particular attention to any "seeds" or free information she happens to throw your way. Seeds refer to subtle hints that women give that point to conversational topics that they would like to or be willing to discuss.

An example:

Bob: You come here often?
Kim: Actually this is my first time here. Just moved here from Florida.
Bob: Oh. I come here every week. I love this band. It’s pretty crowded tonight.

Bob is clueless.

Kim gives him plenty of free information to follow up on. It’s almost as if she’s testing him to see if he has the intelligence or social skills to capitalize on what she says. Bob fails.

So what would be the "right" thing to say?

Well... she mentions that this is her first time in the club and she just moved here from Florida. Bob could have properly "watered the seeds" by asking a) How does she like the club, band, etc? b) What brought her here from Florida? c) How long has she been in the area? d) Where in Florida is she from? e) How long was she there? f) What’s it like there?

Kim’s two short sentences gave Bob tons of information to follow up on. Tons of conversational topics that she has indirectly indicated that she’d like to talk about. But Bob was too worried about himself. Too worried about the impression he was making. Too worried about what to say next to LISTEN to what she said.

Do you see the importance of listening now? You must concentrate on what she says and block everything else out of your mind. If you listen you never have to worry about what to say next because the other person is "telling" you exactly what to say.

Kim even subtly indicated that she was attracted to Bob (or at least not repulsed by him). How? She didn’t blow him off. She gave him some free information to talk to her about. This may have been a conscious decision on her part or it may have been a somewhat unconscious act. In any event, Bob didn’t pick up on it and blew his chances with her.

Keep in mind that if a woman likes you or would like to get to know you better, she will GIVE YOU free information to follow up on. She will throw out some seeds for you to water. If she’s not attracted to you, she won’t give you much of anything and it will be very difficult to maintain a decent conversation with her. No matter how charming you are, if she doesn’t "help you out some" you’ll eventually have to admit defeat and walk away.

So be sure to listen for the topics she’d like to discuss.

Now in order to converse for maximum attraction, you need to keep two other things in mind. You need to tell her about yourself. And you need to maintain a proper talk/listen ratio.

You may have heard or read somewhere that people like to talk about themselves and that you should spend most of your time listening and asking questions if you want others to like you. This is true... to a certain extent.

People DO like to talk about themselves and they DO like those who listen, ask questions, and seem interested in what they’re saying.

But...

If you’re goal is to charm this lady, you’ve got to do more than that. You’ve got to tell her something about yourself. Specifically, you’ve got to "tell her" that YOU TWO ARE VERY MUCH ALIKE.

You do this by making "me-too" statements.

That is, it is desirable to bring yourself into the conversation when you can relate yourself to something she’s talking about or make yourself seem similar to her.

For example:

Kim: I really miss Miami.
Jim: I can imagine. I spent two weeks in Miami last summer. I loved it. Even thought about moving there myself.

Jim is smooth.

Jim didn’t ask a question (this time). He told Kim something about himself that made him seem similar to her. Now if Jim has also been listening and asking questions, then he’s probably doing very well with Kim.

A good talk/listen ratio would be around 40/60 or 30/70. That is, you want to spend around 30 or 40 percent of the time talking, and about 60 to 70 percent of the time listening. And you should spend as much of that 30 to 40 percent as possible in the "me-too zone."

Think about it this way...

Let’s assume you just went on a dinner date with a lady you like very much. If you monopolized the conversation and spent most of the time telling her how "wonderful" you are, you can pretty much expect there won’t be a second date. I hope you can understand this.

On the other hand, imagine you’d spent the entire two hours together sitting there, listening, and asking her questions. You probably did much better. She did seem happy. She did seem to enjoy the conversation. But still...

After the date she’s going to go home and think about the date. And she’s going to think about you. She’s going to think about whether she should spend more time with you or not.

The fact that you haven’t said much of anything all evening is going to be your downfall... BECAUSE SHE HAS NOTHING TO THINK ABOUT.

You haven’t told her anything about yourself. She still has no idea if she should be interested in you or not. She knows you don’t monopolize the conversation and you’re a good listener. And she likes that. But that’s not enough to spark any kind of emotion in her.

Now imagine you’d spent 60 to 70 percent of the date listening to her (really listening and asking questions), and about 30 to 40 percent of the time telling her about yourself. Specifically, telling her about yourself in a way that makes the two of you seem very similar.

This time when she goes home, sits down, grabs something to drink, and starts reminiscing about the date (and you), she’s going to have something substantial to think about. She’s going to think what a wonderful conversationalist you are. You didn’t monopolize the conversation. You didn’t bore her with details of your job, your childhood, or the health of your colon.

And because you spent a substantial amount of time pointing out how similar the two of you are, she’s going to think that you are very SPECIAL. (After all, you’re just like her. You must be.)

People always like others who are similar to themselves. By being similar to me, you essentially validate my perceptions of the world. I will see you as clever, intelligent, charming, and likeable... because you’re like me.

(It’s true that opposites do SOMETIMES attract. But only under certain situations. On the other hand, similars ALMOST ALWAYS attract. You should always go for the similarity angle during the first part of a relationship. You’ll can reveal to her your "unique" qualities later.)

And don’t worry or feel cheated because you don’t get to talk about the things you want to talk about. If you play your cards right during the first few conversations or dates, you’ll have plenty of time later on to bore her with all your "interesting" stories.

The first few conversations (dates) are critical and you have to "play" them right. That means listening for free info, asking interested questions, and making "me too" statements. It’s a simple 1, 2, 3.

Article Source- http://www.sosuave.com/articles/at/converse.htm

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How to Remain Calm In ANY Situation

admin@goodwizz.com (GoodWizz) — Tue, 01 Nov 2011 09:11:58 PDT

Have you ever been out somewhere and all the sudden you feel that creeping, cramping, and suffocating feeling come over you? You try to fight it off but it just gets worse and you know it's nervousness, don't you?How does a person get rid of that?

Well when I was younger I had it really bad, everywhere I went I'd be nervous to the point of actually going to the doctor for it. He said I had social anxiety disorder and that I'd need to be put on medication for it for the rest of my life! What a crock of crap.

THAT STUFF CAN BE OVERCOME WITHOUT THE NEED FOR PILLS

Here's the proof; I took the meds for a time then started working to overcome the need for them using the techniques I'll describe here in a minute. It honestly felt like I was going insane for a time after stopping the pills (it's been 7 years now) but eventually as I took the steps to become more self-confident and to have a bit more self-esteem, I started to come out of the fog of needing them.

I've done some pretty crazy crap though in trying to get over my fears of people. Taking it to the point of dressing ridiculous out in public with stuff painted all over my face and wearing a dress, while yelling "hey everybody!!!" just so that I'd have no chance of redeeming myself from or fearing any kind of rejection. Now you aren’t got to go THAT FAR OUT THERE with it, but it does help bad cases.

I finally and proudly got to the point of giving many speeches in public, going to parties on a regular basis, and hanging out with crowds I've never thought I'd get along with. Not saying ANY of this to brag but just to let you know where I came from and that it's possible, no matter where you're starting at. Anyone can get this handled.

Now here's a small list of non-crazy things that I've found to work REALLY WELL in becoming naturally calm...

· Control your breathing, begin taking deep breathes and try to get it down to where it's a habit.

· Repeat the word "relaaaax" in your mind when you feel nervousness coming over you. Even do it while you're in public.

· Picture your body in your mind, and gradually relax each muscle in it, from your head to your feet one muscle at a time.

· Do basic meditation while you're by yourself. Lie down and relax your mind and body. There are all kinds of sources out there that can help you and give you more info on this.

· Start pushing yourself to get into increasingly more public situations. Doing this by itself makes all the lesser stressful things that use to make you nervous, look like nothing. Start talking to strangers while out one on one...then maybe try talking to a group ect.

· If you can, start giving speeches at meetings or groups. Toastmasters’ international is a great place for this. It's a public speaking group that meets in an area probably close to your home. Try looking them up on google sometime if you're interested.

· Learn more about human relations and communication. Half of self-confidence and comfort comes from knowing what to do in a situation

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/6652695

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Politicians should not ignore social media

admin@goodwizz.com (GoodWizz) — Tue, 25 Oct 2011 22:53:10 PDT

POLITICIANS who ignore social media do so at their peril, warned Rishi Saha, British Prime Minister David Cameron's former digital head honcho.

Mr Saha, now regional director with global public relations firm Hill and Knowlton, said embracing social media was not "just about being on Twitter".

Having a presence on the micro blogging site was one of many weapons politicians should have in the communications bag.

He believes it would be remiss of governments and politicians to dabble in social media without first "just listening".

"People say 'what should you do if you're a government or a politician, what should you do in social media?'

"The first thing I always say is before you do anything, just listen … just listen. Which is actually to some politicians a bit of an alien impulse but it's the most valuable thing that you can do," Mr Saha said.

The concept of grassroots politics had not changed with the advent of social media, but there are more tools available to understand conversations on the internet.

At No.10, Mr Saha and his team used various tactics and tools to conduct digital media monitoring.

Conducting real-time analysis of conversations provided up-to-the-minute insights into what "people were actually talking about", he said.

Such analysis was crucial as it could shed a light on the vast chasm between what concerned voters and the issues politicians and journalists were engrossed in.

"Very often some issues that are incredibly important to people are just not talked about in the media because there's no news hook.

"For example one of the big issues on social (media) is around the price of energy. Only quite recently has this gotten onto the political radar and is being talked about.

"But that's one of those issues where there's an issue that insight and data and social media analysis tells you is being very heavily talked about (but) it's not making it into newsprint and that's an interesting phenomena," Mr Saha told The Australian after a digital conference in Sydney yesterday.

He said politicians and the media "tend to talk about a certain set of issues that interest them and it's often quite unscientific what those issues are but the public are talking about a whole set of other issues".

Digital has enhanced, not replaced, grassroots politics.

"Politics used to be organised. It used to have mass political party membership; you had a much stronger grassroots operation. Now, digital is another form of that.

"You can listen to people's conversations, you can understand what people are saying on public forums, and it informs what you can talk about as a government because ultimately one common refrain against government is that the things you're talking about aren't relevant, and there's a big distance between what I care about and what you're obsessed with.

"Using some of these analysis tools to understand what people are talking about is really valuable because it helps you understand the issues that people are focused on," he said.

Mr Saha, who worked at Downing Street with Mr Cameron's former communications head Andy Coulson, said trust and reputation was key to any successful relationship between government and citizens.

Mr Coulson, who has been charged over phone-hacking and corruption, was the former editor of the now-defunct News of the World, published by News Corp, owner of The Australian.

Mr Saha described his working relationship with Mr Coulson as "very very professional".

"I always found, in my own dealings with him, in a working context he was always very very professional. He listened to advice (and) he made decisions quickly.

"Clearly a lot of the issues which are now being talked about referenced the period before we worked together when he was at the News of the World and there are clearly questions that have to be answered and that's going through the courts at the moment and he'll have to answer those questions".

Mr Saha said "there are people much better qualified than me" when asked how News Corp should navigate through the situation, but ultimately, he said, it came down to trust and reputation.

"Trust is one of those things that once you break it, it takes a long time to rebuild."

He said a British survey had shown that in 1987, 11 per cent of people didn't believe anything the government said. In 2010, that figure had shot up to 40 per cent.

"When you're dealing in that context and when trust has been lost there's not one gimmick that's going to change it … it's not like one quick thing … it's about working at it for many many years (and) trying to be as open and transparent as you can.

"You've got to work at it, you've got to be open and transparent and you've got to get that trust back."

Article Source - http://www.theaustralian.com.au/media/politicians-can-not-ignore-social-media/story-e6frg996-1226176818205

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Help us Spread Goodwizz!

admin@goodwizz.com (GoodWizz) — Wed, 19 Oct 2011 13:12:09 PDT

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