I'm Living a Charmed Life

Times for a MAJOR change 2018 .....

2018-08-12T13:04:00.000-05:00

For the past 9 years I have dreamed of living remote and spent my time planning and preparing for a life of adventure.

Life is a twisted, beautiful thing.... and I have chosen two live with no regrets.... the Bus was a compromise between my desires to live in third world countries serving women and children who had been forgotten... and my ex spouse whose greatest desire was to plant roots and live a life with predictable patterns and traditional methods met me in the middle and together we built the Bus.

Our paths have since diverted and we have come to a point that I need to sell the bus.

She has been a constant security blanket .... a reminder that sometime in my future I would be able to hit the open road and not have a care in the world as we gaze upon the smokey mountains of TN, or the rolling hills of NC.

ONE BUS FOR SALE-

Please share far and wide - this bus has MASSIVE FUN potential and WILL bring another person great satisfaction and security.

What I know about the bus (the technical stuff)

4 new tires put on in April 2018
all mechanical bus parts are functioning tip-top
the generator has not been fired up in a while. It was fully operational when we spent 2 weeks camping in 2015. Since that time we have used shore power-
the plumbing is operational
the 2 AC units are fully functional
the heater system (bus integrated) works great for driving-
Wood burning stove was used during cold nights and keeps the bus toasty- warm
there is PLENTY of under carriage storage and under maser bed "garage" for a family of 10 to live full time on the bus. We had PLENTY of room for more.

things that need to be fixed - The original bus door needs to be replaced with a custom door - It is drafty and loud - does not adequately lock (we use a wedge system to bar the door from being opened during the night and a padlock on the exterior for when we park and leave it)
The nature of a NON air tight bus means we did have some water on the floors causing some areas of the floor to get damaged- it is still minor enough we ignore it.

The cabinet doors have some loose hinges- nothing major.
Dinette table is having issues- we used old winnebago hardware and its just not cutting it for how active my kids have been. I purchased floor supports but have not been able to anchor them adequately yet.
the original radio stopped working - I purchased a replacement with USB and AUX options butt never installed it. Speakers worked last time the radio was on.

Times and Seasons

2015-02-06T10:31:00.001-06:00

It has been OVER a year since I have blogged. Our family has been through some trauma, some teaching and some tribulations.

Madi has gotten married and left the nest.

and the remaining children and I are in a completely new and unchartered territory. It has been very difficult to find where I fit, and what my role in daily life is supposed to be.

We are expecting our 8th baby in June. 20 years after we said 'I-Do' we welcome another spirit into our home.

I was encouraged to keep a record of the uplifting times in our lives, and to be honest this past year has been one I would prefer to forget.

Raising obstinate teenagers and seeing your offspring leave the nest are very difficult things. Although I have worked hard to prepare them for life out 'there' it hasn't properly prepared me for living in this realm.

My charmed life....

2013-10-07T20:21:00.000-05:00

I had an epiphany today.

I realized that I *TRULY* live a charmed life.

Now, don't get me wrong, I still work hard, and have irritants daily, but today is the prime example of a Charmed life.

Here is how my day went.

I woke at 6 a.m. to get my 2 full time students out the door, I had food in the pantry and fridge plenty to feed them both.
After they were both situated I got to gaze out my front windows with breathtaking views. They never get old.

I then had the rest of my crew wake and fed.

I took my 10 year old daughter, who is homeschooling full-time outside to the hammock, where we read for an hour while lazing in the shade. The views from this side of my house are equally stunning, and I shared with her how I thought, "This is the most beautiful view in all the world" to which she replied...." No, you are." tears and a lump formed. She and I snuggled and giggled together. (Hammocks should be mandatory for raising kids)

Then I wrestled my rowdy boys into that same hammock, seriously testing its weight capacity, and the 3 of us had a tickle war, I made the same observation to my 7 year old son, about the utter beauty of our view.... as if on cue, he replied, "Nothing is more beautiful than you, Mom."
Gasp. Sigh.

It was at this very moment, that i realized this life I live, full of laundry, and legos, errands, and errors. Truly is The Life.

I promise you I have VAST flaws and room for improvement. But today. I am their world, and They are mine!

One week later.......

2013-06-11T18:22:00.000-05:00

One week later , I feel as if I have very little to report, the adventure has long worn off, and we still wait.

for any future adoptive parents, the waiting is torture.

We wait for phone calls, Wait for appointments, wait for traffic, wait for the water to boil, wait for dinner, wait for any news....

we wait

and wait

and wait.

When the process is complete, then you will be finished!

The Court decree has been signed. Legally he is ours.
His passport has been printed. (being picked up today)

Today we are SUPPOSED to get his Medical exam (proving he is fit for travel)
We have our Embassy appointment tomorrow, it is only a 'file briefing' but we are PRAYING if we have ALL our papers in order they will process the exit visa and SEND US HOME!

Black & White

2013-06-11T18:20:00.000-05:00

There is right, and there is wrong.

We all attain to do what is right. Most of us can agree on that. So when you come to an issue that is grey-without a doubt you have to do some investigating and searching for the truth in a bad situation.

When you have seen something unethical bring about a HUGE blessing, it is hard to know where to stand.

Adoption has brought millions of children out of poverty, out of suffering and out of pain. So when you KNOW that the majority of adoptions have CORRUPTION throughout each case, how can you decipher where to stand?

I have not been overly angry about the unethical practices of some of the people who attended to my son's adoptions.

The agency did not assist us through the process, they ignored us. We had to navigate the entire confusing, frustrating process without a mentor or guide.
Then days before we were to travel we were emailed a 'liability waiver' I assume this is standard, but in the forms it clearly states that the agency IS NOT ACCOUNTABLE OR RESPONSIBLE for ANY fraud, misinformation, or any other effect of their representatives or their agents. Basically, we take your money, we make no promise of guarantee that you will get your son at the end of this ordeal, and we will not promise any action in an effort to assist along the way.

Very reassuring.

Then I found out the other 2 mom's who were adopting at the same time were charged $1000 LESS than I was. (friends' discount???)

There were so many discrepancies and irregularities, that my head was spinning. At that point, what was I to do? turn back? give up?
I was committed. (and they knew it)

Once we arrived in country the facilitators were very helpful, kind and attentive. They got started right away on our papers, and i felt like we were making real progress!

Then the lies ensued....First on day 8 of my time in Liberia, I was told that they had filed for his passport and they would be ready to request an embassy appointment within days! (of course I was ELATED-although suspicious)

then 3 weeks went by and each time I spoke with those same (kind, and helpful agents) they repeated the same information!
That any day now they were to file the passport papers and be ready to make an embassy appointment. It would have been funny, had it not been so infuriating!

I understand that 'professionals' want to keep their 'clients' happy, but I do not appreciate being lied to.
FINALLY after 5 weeks in the country we filed for the passport- and we completed the process. (while I awaited for my son to emerge from the government building for over 7 hours in the hot African Sun!)

That is only the tip of the ice-burg.

Then after our documents FAILED review at the US embassy the facilitator attempted to file documentation that was falsified. (he had bribed someone to create fake docs) I truly appreciated that they were trying to expedite the process, truly I do. But they KNEW it was false and they LIED.

When their lies were uncovered instead of MANNING UP- they tried to blame someone else!

Then the biggest frustration in ALL of the entire process- the agency HAD AGREED to do Divine's adoption, and they had made verbal promises and agreements.
After the stuff hit the fan with the MANY issues with the in-country facilitators we were told that they (Adoption Agency) was NO LONGER doing ANY adoptions in Liberia.

End of story.

They would NOT accept ANY new clients and they would not work on any more cases. They had 4 open cases that had already been contracted,and they were going to complete those and then wash their hands of the entire country. We had LENGTHY discussions about this decision.

They insinuate that the mishaps and issues that have occurred with my experience are some how my responsibility. Because I have shared openly the blatant missteps of their staff, I have shed doubt and mistrust with their agency, Um- Excuse me- MAYBE the fact that your staff have been DISHONEST and unethical could be the cause of that mistrust!! How can they blame ME (the customer) for their (the "Professional") mistakes?!

I do not comprehend how it can be my responsibility, I ONLY shared a VERY filtered very G-rated emotional experience, I have been told privately that my experience will deter other families to adopt. REALLY?

It is my DUTY as a Christian to hold my tongue, that regardless of the fact that I do not TRUST the ones who are handling ALL our paperwork in country, that the ethics and integrity are in question....

That if I LOVED the children, then I would NOT share these very same thoughts and experiences.

I am angry now-

This same agency who said, ""I had to stop adoptions now there as you know. I don't want to put the last hand full of adoption of have at risk either. I know you are not thrilled, and it is hard to be there so long and watch every little thing in the adoption."" ""I have families in process freaking out about some things you said, and I think other people in Liberia questioning things with us now, and it is sad to me. ""

Sad, is the fact that children are NOT going to have forever families because of the ethics and integrity (or lack thereof)
SAD is that despite the issues being reported- the agency is going to continue using these SAME agents (that have PROVEN they are dishonest)
SAD- is blaming the consumer for voicing CONCERNS and cutting us off- instead of attempting to remedy or offer solutions.

ANGRY i what I am.

ANGRY that this same agency is now doing adoptions for OTHER families. That they will NOT fix the problem, and that they will black list my family, and cut us off. communications has been their biggest weakness.

(we have not been in contact with them ONCE since Feb 16th 2013)

FED UP.

Reflecting and growing pains

2013-06-11T18:17:00.002-05:00

I have been so busy with survival mode, I have not taken time to write down our family happenings. (although all 2 of my readers have called me lately.so ha ha ha)

Here is the run down of the past 2 months, April was a recoup from Liberia, and all the health problems I developed while in that country, honestly I am not sure it is from bugs I brought home, or the heart break I have had from leaving behind so many people that I love.

I have had a hard time getting back on track, the house stays clean, the kids stay fed, but my heart is just aching to be a part of a solution.
The hunger. The vast need. The gluttony of our Nation. The whining and self serving acts we all participate in daily.

Coming home has brought me to my knees, it has developed a bitterness and judgement towards all (including myself) for the abundance we take for granted!

At the same time I have enjoyed my clean beautiful home, my endless supply of food, and my family that surrounds and lifts me with their love.
I speak to someone from Liberia at least 3 times each week. If 8 days go by without a call, I get worried, and I start sending texts to all my family there checking on them.

Do you want to know the theme for each conversation we have? they ask how we are all doing, and initially I think of all the irritants of my day, and all the things I have gotten frustrated with, and then recall how HARD life is for ALL of them. and I reply in gratitude "we are ALL doing good, kids are healthy, Wes still has a job, and we are doing fine." Then I ask how they are, and how family members are. Inevitably it comes around to illness, several hospital trips for Malaria, and the many other fevers that accompany the rainy season. Then we move onto funerals, and who has passed on, which family member is now gone. Then finally they speak of the love they have for me, and the gratitude for the meager support I offer ($30 a month) and my heart sinks. Internally I grumble at the $400 I spend on groceries and I complain about the amount of work I must perform, and here they are deeply grateful for the pittance I have sent.

that is the jist of our conversations, many times they ask me if there is anything I can do to help THEIR neighbors (for they all know SOMEONE who is worse off then they) or they just say they wanted to hear my voice, and know when I would return.

I want to roam, wander, run free. I want to travel, if I could have my dream I would spend every other month traveling to Liberia.

But I know that is not realistic, and I know that my place is here, with my children, and I LOVE LOVE LOVE my children.
and so I plant roots, I dig in, I cultivate happiness and joy in my every action. and I pray.
I pray for; Quita, Ameila, Divine, Annie, Leslie, Washington, Othneil, Jeremiah, Alice, Elijah, Nancy, Aretha, Lucy, Barry, Mary, Nya, each of them touching me in my heart.

The foundations of our future.

2013-04-24T12:45:00.000-05:00

While I am deeply appreciative of the effort it takes to raise a child, I have also seen how the love of a child can induce mothers to do extraordinary things.

Divine's mother is very young, and very inexperienced. I wish there was more I could do than to simply send money for food. Trust me, I have wracked my brain and tired to come up with ANY solution to her poverty and education opportunities.

The decision is hers, and I fully support that her child NEEDS to remain with her.

What I can not help is the fact that the opportunities for growth, for stability and for health are very small.

I pray we can provide some of those basic needs.

I pray she and the 2 boys she is raising can remain safe and healthy.

I pray for wisdom to know what is next, and how I can move forward from here.

ANY funds you would like to send will be sent to Liberia to help Annie pay for food, school, medicine and living expenses.

thanks for your support.

Waiting....

2013-04-05T11:32:00.000-05:00

I am not a patient person. I admit it is my weakness. I like to MOVE once a decision has been made, I LIKE ACTION!

January 20th we decided to adopt Divine.

We are still waiting on the "Pastor" who is his temporary guardian to initiate the paperwork. Divine *WAS* being taken care of by my friends, and all heck broke loose and we were forced to return him to the Pastor.

Now months have passed, and his promises of transfer of care have not happened.

I am so sad. I don't want to fight OVER this child (although I am willing to fight FOR this child!)

I have asked my Liberian contacts to HELP with this move,and once I have this done, it will only be a matter of weeks and we can finalize the adoption.

But for now, we wait on our funding.

We need only $3,000. a tiny portion compared to the last time! For that I am THRILLED.

But I am getting anxious, I want to be able to PUSH things to happen, but can't in good conscience until I have ALL my funds ready.

Please consider a small donation. $5 is all I ask of you my friends.

Share our video of Divine. and PRAY he will be safe until we can return for him!

2013-03-20T17:22:00.003-05:00

It's DONE!!! A year long adoption journey and weeks of work writing a book and preparing it for sale, all for this moment!

Thanks to the tireless efforts of my co-author and biggest cheerleader, Susan and Sasha, my ever present friend and editor, we are ready to launch Fast Adoption Fundraising!

This is the moment when we need you!

Have you heard of 'book bombs'? A book bomb is a marketing strategy that includes MANY people sharing the book, and promoting the book all at one time.

I have the Ebook completed, and the sales page is nearly done, in the next couple of days the link to the book will go live. I need YOU to help me out by blasting this email to all your friends, family, and e-mail list to build anticipation for the sale.

We are offering Fast Adoption Fundraising at a REALLY LOW price in the hopes that it will reach MANY who could use what is inside, including:
• A simple path to raising funds in a limited time frame.
• The ability to expand your pool of potential donors exponentially.
• The power to effectively explain your adoption dreams to others.
• The understanding to solicit donations without offending family, friends, and potential donors.
• The knowledge to leverage online and offline media to reach your goal.
• The confidence to organize supporters, volunteers, and events with ease.

This book will benefit families that are in the middle of thier adoption journey as well as families who feel they can only dream of adoption. Fast Adoption Fundraising will help every family create a simple fundraising plan customized to their specific circumstances. In the book, share our journey, tips for success, and the inside scoop of our own experience.

Please like and SHARE our FACEBOOK page by following this link.

Share the FB page( https://www.facebook.com/FastAdoptionFunds)

SELLING this ebook is the LAST step in raising the funds to adopt Divine! We only need to sell 500 copies and Divine's adoption will be paid for!

THEN, ALL the funds will go directly to Borto Orphanage to FEED and CARE for over 40 orphans.

Thank you!

For anyone interested in FREE GIFTS- Share the email, make a unique blog post that links to the FACEBOOK page, and or BLOG about your involvement in our adoption journey, we will enter your name into a drawing for a FREE COPY!

Dee Gordon
Author of Fast Adoption Funds

Whole Hearted

2013-03-15T15:02:00.000-05:00

Do you do things Whole-hearted? Do you IMMERSE yourself in project, or commit yourself to a goal to the point of 'no gong back' or do you step cautiously, and carefully into every commitment, weighing the in-out and possibly scenarios?

One is not better than the other, as some who spend time judging,gauging, weighing and preparing may find they are better equipped to deal with things as they come along.

But how much time should you commit to an idea before you are COMMITTED? before you realize your whole heart and soul are not going back?

Having a large family, homeschooling, home birthing, living a lifestyle that is full of compassion and charity, all of these need full commitment, no turning back, you can't commit to a large family, and then say, "oops, that was more than I bargained for, and a wee bit more work than I anticipated!" and go back and fix it!

No turning back.

Once you have seen and the Holy Spirit has moved upon your heart, you are convicted.

Take it however you may, but the choice is an individual one, and while, i may not choose to follow your same lifestyle or goals, and I can respect that you are your own individual. I can still Love You.

And you can understand that just because I am not the same as you, does not mean we are on opposite teams.
And just because you 'support' my projects does not mean I am asking you to financially support me, or them! One of the GREATEST ways you can SUPPORT me is in sharing the campaigns that I create or manage.

I have an overall goal to provide for the needs of many Liberian citizens, through agriculture, midwifery, enterprise, education, health opportunities and advocacy.

This may overwhelm YOU, and that is ok, I am not asking you to perform the necessary tasks to accomplish these goals, what I AM asking, is you have the compassion and desire to see OTHERS succeed and you SHARE, the videos, the links, the plans, the goals. Share with you friends, neighbors, your Doctor, your teachers, your students, share it with everyone you come across, because SOMEWHERE in your network is someone who WANTS to be a part of this project, and only through your kindness of sharing will we find one another!

Feel free to fill out the Volunteer form if your ready to commit (even if that means $5 per month and sharing one video)

COMMIT

COMPASSION

CARE

you can fill it out online:

Volunteer Survey

More than words?

2013-03-12T15:07:00.000-05:00

It has been over a month since I last wrote. I apologize, and plead ALL the happenings have kept me occupied!

On February 16th 2013 Peter and I flew home to be reunited with our family!

What a triumphant time that was!

Then once we had rested and settled into our home routine (48 hours) we started looking back on the needs of our Liberian family, and the ways (big and small) that we could make a difference.

We are so blessed to have all that we enjoy, more food than 80% of the world population can ever fathom.
We have resources left over after all our necessities to peruse entertainment and pleasure.

Somehow all that was hard to swallow.

Somehow the little things that brought me great enjoyment before, now brought me sorrow.

I can no longer enjoy those little rituals, for the knowledge that if I gave up, just a little more, I would have enough left over to share, help, and lift those who had so little.

To put it in perspective, the annual tuition for a school age child is $80
The monthly costs to charge and use a cell phone (a vital need in Liberia) $30
Costs of taxi/shuttle transportation to get to work (if your lucky enough to have a job) $45

average monthly salary - $45-125

You can see just with this, how Up-side down these people are in their resources, I have not even mentioned food.

the food in Liberia is sold in such small quantities (.20 cents for a baggie of rice) and at first i could not understand/comprehend why this was?

Then when i saw those mothers going to the market or food stands any buying their daily provisions, I realized.

It took them all day long to find the means to buy $1 worth of food for their families.

And they had several mouths to feed. It is astounding what we all consider "NEEDS"

I am trying to be compassionate with out being judgmental.
I know this is my short coming, as I can not understand why OTHERS can not feel moved to do the same.

I am a work in progress, and I so appreciate ALL who have jumped onto my bandwagon and made THEIR sacrifices to help in any size, way or portion to help!

can we learn from reflection.....

2013-02-08T02:54:00.001-06:00

February 8th 2013

More than a month as passed since I left my family and entered the unknown.
I have slept without my babies, my comforts for 6 weeks. I miss my children fiercely, but I know they are taken care of, fed, loved and safe. For this I thank my Heavenly Father and my earthly parents and in-laws.
When we counseled with our agency about the possible issues during the adoption, corruption was never mentioned. We never imagined the level of deceit that we would be faced. Living amongst the beautiful people of Liberia, I am starting to get it.
For almost 20 years these same faces had to run, hide and survive day to day with murder, war and starvation.
For more years than many of them lived in peace, they lived with the visual of children, mothers and fathers being slaughtered before their very eyes.

Some of the stories you hear make your stomach hurt. Some infuriate you, but if you listen, and try to have an understanding of what has shaped their character, their resolve and their future, you can understand how the grey area becomes so wide.
These beautiful people had to learn HOW to survive, beg, steal and borrow. They had no choice but to hide in the hills, to disguise their tiny babies in the bush, to dodge the bullets, machetes, and the rebels. The kinds of atrocities that occurred on a daily basis would change any person. NO matter how deeply convicted they started out.
I am by no means justifying their actions, and I do not plan to work with these people that do not know anything but lies and corruption, but I am beginning to understand. My heart is moved with compassion, pity for the men and women that came out after this terrible war with the views of right and wrong completely skewed.

Let us ALL evaluate what life experience we have that encourages the same.
What breeds mediocrity, laziness, and gluttony?

What is it in each of US that promotes the character traits that allow us to slide far from the man or woman we are destined to be, and become those that average efforts, and average rewards are ‘good enough’

Good enough is never enough, I beg you to consider to look into YOUR heart (as I gaze into mine) and grasp the qualities of Honest, Brave, Respectful, Hard working, Faithful, Integrity, Respect Charity, Obedience, Virtue, Courage, Honesty, Leadership, Accountability, Self control, Delayed gratification.

Where am I lacking, where can I improve. Where am I rationalizing my actions based upon my personal experience that is keeping me from attaining these qualities?

I had a powerful experience yesterday that once again reminded me that I am doing the Lord's work.
I am fighting a battle for a valiant spirit, that Heavenly Father Knows and Loves. Peter will grow up to be a great man a leader, and an honorable example.

I am blessed to be his mother.

Borto Orphanage- Donations

2013-01-23T02:20:00.000-06:00

For those of you wanting to help with Borto Orphanage, here is the details I have worked out so far.

they have NO NGO's that support them, and the Missionaries that helped them organize and start the blog have returned home and stayed in contact, however have not kept up with the blog. I have asked to be allowed to update the blog, and the other 2 ladies who went with me, (Kelley & Kristi) are also willing to support the children in every way they can.

Donations of GOODS rather than money are WELCOME- we are working on 2 separate leads that have shipping containers scheduled to leave the midwest and arrive in Monrovia port.

These 2 containers are shipped via two individuals who ship frequently, and we hare hoping they will allow us some space for when we do find materials (Especially School supplies)

I have been looking into areas that sell the supplies to manufacture items here (specifically Aquapoinics) And for the most part I believe we can get these items in country. (Close to US prices, so long as a Liberian represents us in the purchase)

It is my sincere hope that many of YOU will plan a trip here to see the need, and to implement YOUR own program, for now, I am the only contact for the orphanage, and if you have concerns about the integrity of the donations, please let me know, i am working on a system of accountability to ensure your donation is used for EXACTLY what you intend.

The more people that come here to inspect and verify on their own, the more we will be assured our funds are being used appropriately.

Divine!

2013-01-22T16:03:00.000-06:00

I met this sweet tiny little guy the first visit to the Orphanage (they call it a foster home, and they run it well, but it is still for Orphans, and it is still bleak)

Divine was hiding off by himself, and Kristi in our group scooped him up, and he nuzzled into her.
I felt a pang of jealousy as I was smitten with him, and wished I had been able to snuggle with him.

Of course i enjoyed holding all the other special needs babies, and meeting all the people who had been a part of Peter's past.

but I could not get his face out of my mind.

We visited with the babies several times, and each time Kristi would pick up Divine, and claim him ;)

She even started talking about adopting him, I spoke up then, that if she was not able, I would love to step in.

Kristi spent time in serious prayer, and with a heavy heart knew that she was not able to adopt Divine at this time.

I waited until the evening to ask her if she was sure of her decision, and then shared with her my thoughts.

God Works in Mysterious Ways Slideshow: Deanna’s trip to Monrovia was created with TripAdvisor TripWow!

Between the two of us, we were captivated by this very timid, very tiny little boy.

Then I had to start campaigning to my husband. With all the government issues that were taking place, and all the uncertainty, he was not ready to have a conversation about more children. (At least not more $10,000 children)

It took a few days of scattered conversations before he realized I was serious.

We had late night conversations about the technicalities, and complications, then we had EARLY morning talks about the Path God has chosen For us.

It is undeniable that once you have walked with these children and fed, bathed, and prayed over these children, you can not go home at night without the feeling of responsibility. You NEED to help them, and all the luxuries of life loose their luster.

How can I NOT reach out to a child, a child that so desperately wants to be loved, held, protected.

How can i not?

So here I am. Willing and yet, unable to move forward. It will take $5,000 up front to begin the paperwork.

Stepp

ing out on faith. again.
Praying for the loving support of our friends everywhere!

redundant & impotent

2013-01-18T03:23:00.002-06:00

The story in Afirca is redundant. The need is astronomical, the poverty is gut-wrenching.
The majority of Africans are lucky if they get one meal each day.
They are accustomed to going without, of making do, of building from scratch. They take the wild grasses and sticks and make a hut, they take the fabric and make dresses (Called Lapa)

They are simple, and quiet people.
Most would be mortified if they knew you felt sorry for them.
Most would never ask you for anything, although they look at you longing and hope you can FEEL the pleading in their hungry eyes.
My morning started out with a vis

it to Al. he is the 7 year old boy that started having leg tremors and eventually lost his ability to walk. He has an enormous head, the Dr.’s have said it is a ‘brain infection’ so ambiguous. But honestly no one here has the technology (nor the power and knowledge) to do more than the very basic.
His mother asked me to help her save her son. He is loved, he is cared for, and he is slowly dying.
Next we visited a school in Coca Cola factory village, it is a neat little subdivision of homes that are cared for by people who CARE. They keep the lawns swept, and the yards clean, of the 150 homes, only 2 or 3 own a car. These are very simple humble people.
Quita my good friend has started a school in her neighborhood; she and her husband are the caregivers to many in need.
The school was organized, clean, and well run. The few books and supplies they did have fit onto one table less than 4 ft long.
The children all wear their uniforms and come HUNGRY to learn. They arise early in the morning, (most have never even heard of breakfast) and walk to the school, where their parents have paid $1300 Liberian dollars for tuition. They meet from 8 a.m. until 2 p.m. when they get home, they clean the yard, house and do the laundry by hand, they begin the preparations for dinner, and then the nightly dinner dishes. This is their one meal each day. 6 o’clock.
The kids are cheerful, helpful, hardworking and appreciate affection and attention. The staff is loving, giving and dedicated. They have given everything to protect and serve God’s children.
Looking through this album is surreal to me.
I have touched their faces, I have held their hands, and I have honestly fallen in love. (with more than a few)
What can I do? I am only one person. I am NOT wealthy, influential or powerful. I am only me. A mother, a neighbor and friend.
One thing I cannot deny is regardless of the gross discrepancy between the needs and the resources. I will continue to be their voice. I will continue to pray for them, and I will hope that you will join me, in any way you can.
A master plan on the needs, and future of Borto Orphanage :
Finding a permanent location for the children and staff to live. (at the present they are squatters)

Find the funds for building the home and dormitory for the 41 children they presently have.
Encourage the Liberian government to LIFT the moratorium on adoptions.
Find the resources to bring sustainable food sources to the orphanage: including
Aquaponics
Goat herd
Chicken flock
Some way to produce income in the country to provide for their ongoing needs.
Sponsors for the children’s school needs and daily meal.

Here are some items that are needed and their costs to purchase in country.
41 Mattresses $30 each
6 loads of zinc to roof finish the roof $150 each
One acre lot to purchase from the government $2,000
Salary for each person who works at the orphanage
House mistress $100 (x3)
Cooks $50 (x4)
Security Guards $50 (x4)
It can feel like a black hole of hopelessness.
Trust me. If I spend too much time thinking about that, I may give up.
But if we each take a little portion of the garden, and tend to it with our love and attention, it will matter to those we serve, no matter how small our plot is.

Accra, Ghana

2013-01-10T06:57:00.000-06:00

We made a stop in Ghana when the Delta flight was canceled due to mechanical issues.

Needless to say, all 200+ passengers were scrambling and unhappy. Delta offered to put up everyone at local hotels, which were surprisingly nice.

I ended up bunking with wonderful Dr. Faith Lamb-Parker. She is brilliant, compassionate, and funny. We had a great time.

The day we arrived in Ghana was the day before their Inauguration of a new President.
The streets had colorful ribbons, and UN diplomat planes on the tarmac.

It was very exciting.

After Ghana, we arrived in Liberia. (My original arrival date was Jan 4th, I arrived on Jan 8th) I had lost my phone on the plane during our disembarkation in Accra. Every phone number I needed was on that phone, and I had no way to contact either the Hotel, nor the friendly Quita who was to pick me up and deliver me to the hotel.

Again, Dr. Faith to the rescue, she helped me file the paperwork for the lost bags, and then had her private driver deliver me to the hotel. (after we had to stop for diapers and water at the supermarket)

I finally arrived at Moko's around 7 pm. local time.

Peter and I were HUNGRY and anxious to get showered and fed.

Moko's staff was wonderful, they ordered us a pizza and brought it to the room.

Everyone here in Liberia is friendly, helpful and kind. I have been so blessed by the Agency staff, and by all I have met.
I do have to say; I already have 2 mosquito bites, and Peter & I are both feeling a bit under the weather. But we made it to the pharmacy yesterday and hopefully our meds will help us to feel better soon!

I wanted to make a list for anyone who is traveling here; things NOT to forget at home, because even though they have a super market, they do not stock things like we have at home.

Items we are missing:
Huggies Diapers (the diapers on the shelf here have plastic exterior and tape tabs)
SHOES my flip-flops have broken and I have not seen a great place to buy better shoes. (they have wheelbarrow carts selling shoes made from recycled tires, but i have worn those in the past and they can be uncomfortable)
American Clothes are a premium around here, you wont find an easy place to replace your lost luggage! (there are NO shops/malls here)
A good hamburger! (I ordered a burger yesterday, and honestly it reminded me of the scene in Les Mis during the song "Master of the House" if you get my drift?
the french fries were good, but Peters plate of Chicken & Rice was $13!!

For now that is all that I have compiled on the list, mostly because I figure, we can live without anything else. I have not even tried to find a swim suit, as that was also lost in the luggage, but I suppose I can swim in my leggings and tee shirt.

New York, New York 2013

2013-01-04T22:17:00.000-06:00

Our unplanned visit to NYC has been an adventure! The tickets to get to Liberia today were ONLY routed through Ghana, and I do not have a visa for Ghana, therefore I would not be able to fly there. Lame. So we made the best of a batch of sour milk! Peter and I checked back into our hotel room (that we checked out of 4 hours earlier) We charged up the cel phone, and hit the streets of NYC. Our shuttle driver (Henry) was AWESOME. He told me which train to ride, and where to get off, told me how to find yummy food.... New Yorkers have a reputation.... Let's just say the newspaper vendors can be RUDE. (one hawking papers sounded JUST like Rosie O'donnel...with attitude) any Who.... the NYPD are GREAT, and the professionals I have met with are some of the nicest folks I have ever met, Delta ticketing agents (known for ATTITUDE!) were SUPER kind and helpful!!

Unplanned visit to 9/11 memorial

2013-01-04T09:09:00.000-06:00

As Peter & were delayed at FJK airport, we decided to go on an adventure! We hiked to the subway (yeah!) and walked to the 9/11 memorial site. We were going on less than 3 hours of sleep, so we honestly did not take much time, just walked through the 16 security check-points, looked into the 2 vast water falls, and then scuttled our way back towards the subway. i had to carry Peter almost half way, as even HE ran out of energy! (hard to believe!)

Scavenger hunt....

2012-12-11T23:33:00.000-06:00

One place I frequently stop into is Habitat for Humanity Re-Store. They sell used items for rock bottom prices, a gallon of pain can be less than $5 sometimes I go there, I look through the paint aisles and if I find a color I like, I buy it and save it for a project. I have about 15 gallons of paint in varying colors in the basement. This week it came in handy. We have been saving every last penny for our traveling expenses, while it is Christmas Time and everyone else is out shopping and adorning their home with the latest styles, we are scheming, planning and enjoying a simplified Christmas. I am pretty sure it is the nesting instinct, even though Peter is already here with us, it is nerves from the upcoming events that are causing me to stress, worry ad fidget. So Last week I called in the helpers and on Monday we painted, for 10 hours straight, and then this week I painted solo some more... I am so happy that I had these paint colors stashed away for this time, when I had the energy and desire to "DO SOMETHING" but I needed to limit my resources! What fun it was to paint the 'projector screen' onto the wall, and then the boys room got a little wains-coat type accent color, in all, i feel accomplished. and now i go back to planning our global journey!

The joy & the Pain

2012-11-28T15:22:00.000-06:00

Being a mother has brought immense JOY... First smiles, First Tooth, blowing kisses, snuggles throughout the morning, Watching them discover their reflection in a mirror.

So many fun, happy moments.... Then the opposite can be said as well, Sick babies, emergency rooms, 31 days in ICU, disappointments, postpartum depression, sneaking out (teens), ornery neighbors that seem hell-bent on torturing your children ;)

what do we focus on? Where do we linger?

Natural man tendency is to linger on the negative. Which then creates a stronger memory of that negativity. We as mother's need to fight the impulse to linger in the mire. We need to take out those happy moments like a treasured photo and bask in that glorious memory. To look at it from every angle.

It is this method of noticing the GREAT times, the GOOD deeds, and the HAPPY moments that we will then be led to smile more.... and ENJOY our journey of Motherhood. I pray that you will make a list of all the finest moments in your recollection as a Mother. Go ahead. Right now. Bask.....

red heads, new teeth, warm newborn breath, nursing sounds, First coo, the first moment you held your babe, giggles, crawling, fascination with ceiling fans, first outings, park days, first words, mama, dadda, creativity, hard work,

Happy Thanksgiving!

2012-11-21T22:55:00.001-06:00

We are so abundantly blessed. We decided that the Holidays would be dismal if we were not able to break bread with our close friends (might as well be family) So we saved our pennies, and packed our car, and drove 10+ hours I WILL say I did not enjoy the drive, I was already stressed by the time we hit the road, and my energy has been depleted since I had walking Pneumonia last month. It took all I had just to ensure everyone had clean clothes and undies. But persevere we did, and we arrived last night at 2:39 a.m. Tuesday. (ugh) All the Grove kids were awake and awaiting for our arrival....we hugged, squealed, and promptly sent all the littles to bed.... Today was a typical day of relaxing, and energizing at once. the Wonderful Daddy's took all but 2 kids to Timbertown play area while Sasha and I visited on the couch and Madi & Jolie made pies.... We couldn't ask for a better afternoon. (OK massages and a shopping spree would have been fun...BUT) Tomorrow is Thanksgiving, and we have more food than many 3rd world nations see in a month on the menu. We are so very blessed. Food to eat. Family to enjoy it with. Warm and safe beds to rest. Freedoms. Testimony. Love. Hope.

A little slice of Heaven

2012-09-28T18:47:00.000-05:00

I have 4 Amazing, Beautiful, Creative and Awesome Daughters, They are my best friends, and my biggest helpers.

My wonderful husband took my oldest daughter on a "Father & Sons" Camp-out in Payson in 2001 and was asked NOT to repeat his appearance sans sons.

So for all these years my girls have missed out on camp outs with their daddy. Party it is my fault, as I have a "Honey-do-list" lone enough to keep 4 handy-men working full time year round. (Yes I know I am demanding)
So I need to take a chill-pill once a year and let him take his kids camping.

This year, My Wesley has 3 SONS! and none are newborns!!

He was able to attend the Father & Sons campout with no guilt and worry!

So I took my lovely daughters out last night for a GNO, and we had A BLAST! Shopping, lunch Dinner, Swimming at an indoor water park....then chasing cookies and movies until we were all too tired to stay awake.

We came home this afternoon to see Daddy & the Boys prepare and leave for their first ever campout. (without mom)

Not only did my amazing husband take our 3 boys. he also volunteered (honestly with NO prompting from me!) to take our Sweet friends' 2 boys while THEIR amazing father is off in Idaho training for his new job.

HOW COOL IS THAT!?

Man I snagged a great guy~!

So tonight, my 16 year old is at the Home coming game, She took her 14 year old sister, my 12 year old is entertaining a friend and my 9 Year old is playing at her friends' house.....

While I sit here, with a clean house, a full fridge, and nobody to tend to!

A-MAZING.

This is a little slice of heaven, knowing my boys are doing what boys love most, (playing in the dirt and camp fire) and my girls were utterly spoiled rotten and content, I feel accomplished, sincerely accomplished, like I have done all I can do in life to succeed.
(Plus I rode my bike 4 miles so I get bonus points eh??)

2012-09-10T23:16:00.001-05:00

How did we get here?

2012-08-09T08:40:00.002-05:00

I wanted to share a story, one that spans over 13 years.

in the summer of 1998 I lived in Orem, Utah and attended the best ward (church ) that ever existed, the entire congregation was so focused on service and love, that no one was ever left to feel alone. We were all so connected and I mourned leaving that area many years later.

I was pregnant with my second child, and had seen a beautiful young black girl attending church occasionally, who was equally extended in pregnancy as I was. She was so quiet and shy, at first I thought she did not speak English. I was a bit self absorbed in my pregnancy and did not take the time to reach out to her.

I gave birth on September 16th 1998 to a fat little cherub that was immediately diagnosed with having a heart defect. I was on a constant circuit to doctors and specialty clinics to figure out exactly what her ailment was.

She screamed 24/7 and was NOT an easy, enjoyable newborn. ;)

10 days after she was born, I received a phone call from Bryce Chamberlain (who I am assuming was the ward mission leader at the time?) He told me of this young, sweet girl without a family, that had given birth that morning and could use someone to reach out and support her. He asked that I make a trip to the hospital and introduce myself.

I was nervous, I did not even know her name, and remember, I honestly thought she did not speak English, so I was afraid the meeting would be a total disaster.

I approached her assigned room in the Maternity ward, and knocked on her door, she was sitting up in her bad, alone in a dark room. I told her who I was, and asked a few questions.

She had given birth early in the morning, and by the time I had arrived it was close to lunch hour. She had been left alone since the birth, and no one, not even the nurses had taken the time to explain to her what was happening. The most shocking part, she had NO idea where her baby was, She had not seen nor held him and she was patiently waiting for someone to bring him to her. Her older brother had dropped in and brought her a lunch, but otherwise she was utterly alone.

I was enraged! Being that I too had just given birth to a baby (at a different hospital) and this hospital had a reputation for being cruel to unwed mothers (they would shame them, or ignore them as in this situation)
I immediately approached the nurses station and asked where Claudine's Son was?

They had admitted him to the NICU and had not shared any of those details with this new delicate, scared mom. I immediately escorted her via wheelchair to the NICU where I was witness to the first time she was able to see and hold her new baby boy. He had aspirated and was on oxygen, but she was able to hold him.

My mothers instinct took over and I began asking questions, of who was there to help her, who was she going home with, did she had a crib, car-seat, clothes, diapers, and did she have any idea what to expect for this stage in life.

She was totally naive, she had nothing for this new baby, not one thing, no bottles, no diapers, no bed, not one single thing. I was overcome with the desire to protect and aid this sweet, soft spoken young girl who was left utterly alone in her weakest hour.

I left the hospital after she had spent time with her new son, (which she asked my help in naming, Dante Christopher)
and I immediately went to work, I called in my Visiting Teachers, and the Relief Society president, and together we urgently put together a baby shower, hosted by another ward sister (maybe Leslie Louw?)

We were able to arrange for the baby shower the day Dante was released from the hospital. Claudine, Abigel, and I spent a few hours in the NICU nursery spending time with the new baby boy, as well as teaching Claudine how to pump her milk (since none on the staffing had taken the time to put the baby to her breast, and had already given him a bottle...grrr....)

It was a major struggle to overcome that hurdle, but together the 3 of us became inseparable.
When Dante was released and brought home, Claudine spent most of her days at our home, she 'lived' with a 2nd cousin in a house less than a block from me, however they had several children and felt that she was a serious burden, the mother of the house also felt like Claudine should be punished for her teen pregnancy and therefore refused to assist of nurture her in any way.

I was honored to assist, nurture, love, teach and coach this impressionable young girl, she was only 8 years younger than I, but she was so very innocent as the ways of life, and especially parenting (her mother had died in Haiti when she was a very young girl)

For the next 5 years Claudine lived with us off and on, she would get an apartment, and work really hard (while we kept Dante for her school, or work schedule) Dante & Abigel shared a crib for the first 2 years, and then shared a friendship for the 3 after that.

in 2004 When our family moved to Alaska, Claudine sadly stayed behind in Utah.

And we lost contact, with her moving around and not keeping the same phone numbers, I had no way of finding her, I attempted many times to contact her 2nd Cousins family, but they were dead-set on tormenting this young girl, and would like to me telling me they did not know a "Claudine"

For years I would have dreams tormenting me, not knowing where she was, or how they were doing, it was the most heart breaking separation I have ever endured.

3 years ago I got the most wonderful gift.

Through facebook, we were able to reconnect and be reunited. Claudine had become a wife, and had given birth to 2 more sons! She lived in Atlanta where her husband works at Lowes, and they have built a life.

I spent a week with Claudine last summer at my home in Missouri, where we reminisced and rekindled the loving relationship not seeing each-other for 8 years was HELL.

Being able to connect through email,phone and our yearly visits has been such a blessing!

Claudine has now given life to a beautiful new baby girl, she has allowed me to come stay in her home and love on all her babies.

Here is the odd part, I feel a maternal connection to her deeper than anything i can describe, the pride and joy that she and her babies bring me are overwhelming, so even though we are only 8 years different, I feel a motherly love and protection over her.

and a pride that can not be described, she has raised 3 little boys to be obedient, orderly, intelligent, compassionate, clean, respectful, honorable, everything you would ever want in your children and grand children. She has accomplished. she and her husband Simon are loving, attentive and give instruction and guidance to these kids, they could NOT be better parents!

I could NOT be more proud of the job she has done, knowing how little she knew about babies, and how much we went over during those first years of Dantes life, and how AMAZING she has been for these 4 kids.

I am bursting at the seams seeing her, and knowing these kids. They are so wonderful! So beautiful. So precious. So perfect.

I am so grateful for the phone call i got almost 14 years ago, inviting me to meet and support a young, scared, unwed, innocent, naive little girl.

I am so grateful for the opportunity to reunite and maintain our family connection.

What an honor it is to see this woman, and be privileged to love on her and these babies.

World's Ugliest Cake

2012-08-01T21:06:00.000-05:00

Baked by My lovely daughter. OK I know it may sound rude to say it, but this cake was ugly.

Really ugly.

As ugly as ALL the cakes i have attempted to make..... but you want to know the most beautiful thing about this cake?
Gracie. Yep she is the most beautiful part of this cake, let me explain.

Gracie turned 12 this past week, she and I had a great fun afternoon of shopping and one-on-one time, I let her choose the shops, and her gifts, you would think that a 12 year old girl would beg for clothes, jewelry, make-up etc.....

Not this one.

She is a gem.

She wanted only one thing for her birthday, supplies to bake.

So we bought cookie cutters, and measuring cups, spoons, Cupcake papers, decorations, sprinkles, recipe books, magazines, and ingredients. We bought it all. and then for HER birthday she baked us cupcakes, and every day since she has been learning new recipes, and teaching herself how to frost, how to get a layered cake to release from the pan......that is the lesson for today.

How to get the cake to come out of the pan in one piece.

and so we ate the ugliest cake. It was also by the way the most moist, fluffy, scrumptious cake i have ever eaten. and yes, I ate a sugar laden baked treat. (by the way the only fake sugar in it was the frosting, everything else was a natural sugar)

but a mom's got to do the tough jobs, and tasting this cake was a real sacrifice. It. was. amazing. Ugly, but amazing!