I’ve been reading a lot about emotions recently, and I love the way Brene Brown describes guilt in her book, Atlas of the Heart: Mapping Meaningful Connection and the Language of Human Experience. “Like shame, guilt is an emotion that we experience when we fall short of our own expectations or standards. However, with guilt, our focus is on having done something wrong and on doing something to set things right, like apologizing or changing behavior.” Guilt, in moderation, can be a good thing. We can use it as an indicator that maybe an apology or change in behavior is needed to alleviate the feeling. As Brene says, it’s a feeling that comes from our own expectations, so guilt can also be an indication that our standards are just too high- I’m talking to you my fellow perfectionists! Many times we moms have such high expectations for ourselves that we feel guilty when we haven’t actually done anything wrong, the very definition of “mom guilt” in my opinion. If you suffer from this affliction then I have a hack for you! 

I recently finished the book, It’s Not Always Depression: Working the Change Triangle to Listen to the Body, Discover Core Emotions, and Connect to Your Authentic Self by Hilary Jacobs Hendel and highly recommend it! In the book, she presents a tool called “The Change Triangle” that has been life changing for me. In a nutshell, we all have seven core emotions (anger, fear, joy, excitement, sexual excitement, disgust and sadness). When one of these comes up and it’s too much, we block that feeling with an inhibitory emotion (guilt, shame or anxiety). If that doesn’t work, we turn to a defense like being vague, avoidance or blaming. Beneath our core emotions exists a magical, open-hearted state where we experience the seven c’s- compassion, curiosity, calmness, courage, clarity, confidence, and connection. When we can locate ourselves on the triangle we can work ourselves back to an open-hearted state.

Guilt is an inhibitory emotion, which means it’s blocking a core emotion. If you can identify which core emotion(s) you are feeling, then you will get back to an open-hearted state more quickly. Let’s take one of my examples above. I felt guilty that I couldn't attend both my son’s flag football game and my daughter’s art show that happened to be at the same time. Now, I can run through the core emotions, Do I feel angry? Yes, I’m annoyed that they happen to fall at the same time. Am I afraid? Yes, I’m afraid if I choose one event over the other it will hurt my relationship with my children and they will think I love one more than the other. Am I joyful? No. Am I excited? No. Am I sexually excited? No. Am I disgusted? No. Am I sad? Yes, I’m sad I can’t be in two places at once.

Ok, so this is where the hack lies. You can actually skip the step of identifying your core emotions, and can ask yourself a magic question instead. I once took an improv class and the teacher said, “Don’t get furious, get curious!” That is exactly what “The Change Triangle” suggests too. Feeling guilt suggests you have or will do something wrong, so when it comes to guilt the magic question is, “What crime have I committed?” In this example (and all “mom guilt” situations), there is no crime. I did not make the schedule for the football game or the art show. I am only one human and cannot be in two places at once. I love both of my children and would be at both events if it were humanly possible. If you have committed no crime, then the last and most important step is to turn your guilt into gratitude.

I can be grateful for a supportive husband that can take one of the kids to their event so I can take the other to theirs. I can be grateful for technology so we can take pictures and videos and share them when we meet for dinner after the events. I can be grateful I have understanding children who know I love them and that if I could be at both I would be. I can be grateful for the family culture we have created where our kids get to be part of the conversation about which parent goes to which event. I can be grateful for the one-on-one time I get with Tyler or Ember. I can be grateful Tyler is healthy and has the opportunity to play flag football. I can be grateful for Ember’s imagination and the opportunity to show off her work to the community. I can be grateful for Tyler’s football coach and Ember’s art teachers. The list can literally be endless if you allow yourself to really get in the attitude of gratitude. 

When we shift into a state of gratitude, we cannot also be sad, angry, afraid or any negative emotion. We are so hard on ourselves when most of the time we haven’t actually done anything wrong. It’s not a crime to love what you do for work. It’s not a crime to take care of yourself and let your kids watch a show while you take a bath. It’s not a crime to let your kids have some candy or a soda or pizza every night of the week (sometimes). It’s not a crime to be human and make mistakes. 

If in your questioning, you discover you did actually do something wrong, by all means, repair the relationship with an apology or a change in your actions, but I would venture to guess “mom guilt” is always unwarranted. Next time, you are feeling it, remember, “don’t get furious, get curious,” “what crime have I committed?” and then shift from guilt to gratitude. It definitely takes some practice, but soon you will break that pattern and live more and more in your natural open-hearted state.

I’m grateful for the way my brain can take information from multiple sources and boil it down to something I can use in my day-to-day life to be a better human, wife, mom, and friend and that I get to share it with you, dear reader. I’m grateful for Brene Brown and all I have learned from her through her work. I’m grateful for “The Change Triangle” and the way Hilary Jacobs Hendel presented it so practically and clearly in her book that it’s now a tool I can use without having to be her therapy client. I’m grateful that my “mom guilt” is unwarranted and I finally have a tool to let myself off the hook for crimes I did not commit. I hope this is as helpful to you as it is to me.

Blessings, 

Lindsay 

I didn’t know it at the time, but I’ve come to discover, I am a huge people-pleaser. His question stirred a swirl of thoughts in my brain. I said I would post a blog every week, this is what “good” authors do, this is what’s expected of me, I’ll let my readers down! I replied, “I'm writing a blog post, it’s due tomorrow.” He looked confused, so I tried to make it more clear to him, “I said I would write a blog post every week and it comes out on Friday so I have to finish this tonight so it goes out on time.” Again he just stared at me in confusion. He could tell I was stressed, so he proceeded cautiously, but his words felt like freedom,

“Who says you need to write a blog post every week?” he asked.

“Well, I said I would.” One of my core values is integrity, so if I say I’m going to do something then I will bend over backwards to make it happen.

“And why does it have to be every week?” he asked.

“Well, I guess it doesn’t. I just picked that because it seemed pretty standard and what other authors are doing.” This seemed like a perfectly reasonable explanation in my mind but in reality I had no idea what was “standard” in the industry or if there even was a standard. It was probably something I had heard at a business conference somewhere but the difference is I wasn’t selling books to make money. That was a happy side effect but not the main goal for us.

“So, if you make the rules, do you really need to finish this tonight? Why don’t you come to bed?” The bed did look inviting.

“Well, I don’t want to let my readers down.” I said matter-of-factly. And then came the innocent question that shot a bullet into my heart, but also freed me from the burden I had created for myself.

“What readers?”

This question stopped me in my tracks and shrouded me with doubt. I’m sure there is a way to actually track that information, but as someone who is not very tech savvy, I had no idea how many people actually read my blog. When I first started blogging, I was doing it for all the wrong reasons. I was doing it for others. I was doing it because it was expected that an author would write a blog, but why? I did it because I thought it was what I was supposed to do, but I didn’t particularly enjoy it. It stressed me out and as a busy mom with two kids, I already had enough of that in my life. 

After that night, I stopped putting so much pressure on myself to keep up with blogging. Mike helped me realize it was a stressor I didn’t need in my life. After that night I only blogged if I got the same question over and over again, because it was easier to put it in a blog post I could share than type out the same response multiple times. Now, however, I have grown and learned a lot about myself over the past few years and I’m ready to dive back in on my own terms. At almost 40, I am finally learning to feel my feelings and follow my heart. I thought about writing another book, but that idea tied my stomach in knots.

I thought, maybe the knots are because of excitement, but when I got quiet I heard a voice that said, “why don’t you start smaller and start blogging again?” That idea opened my heart and true excitement poured into my heart and this blog post is what poured out.

I’m not committing to blogging on a time frame, but I’m excited to share some lessons I have learned about myself over the past couple years and as they pour out of me, I will pass them along to you. I actually don’t even care if anyone reads these words because now this blog is for me. I shared a journal entry with a friend the other day and she was really touched by my words. I think I was given a gift of words to encourage others with the lessons I am learning. If these words encourage even one person then it has all been worth the effort. I have never written to be known or make money but only to positively impact others lives and that is my wish for this humble blog moving forward.

If you have found your way to this page, I’m grateful you are here. I’m grateful for the freedom Mike gave me that night with his questions and that he has always wanted the best for our lives. I’m grateful my kids are older now and don’t need me as much, so I can have more time to fill up my cup to be the best mom I can be. I’m grateful for these words that flowed through me onto this page and that they may give you permission to let go of something arbitrary in your life that is stressing you out. Have a blessed day,

Lindsay 

1. Timer- Our Alexa helps me with not burning meals. I’m constantly asking Alexa to set timers while I’m cooking. You can even name the timers, which is super helpful when you’re cooking more than one thing at a time. Our kids use the timer feature almost daily to keep track of their screen time use. When the kids have trouble with sharing, Alexa steps in to help them create a “time contract” with each other (I will play with this toy for 5 minutes and then you can have it for 5 minutes). The timer feature is also helpful when brushing teeth. Set it for 2 minutes and tell the kids they have to brush until the timer goes off.

2. Reminders- I don’t know about you, but I have so many thoughts bouncing around in my head that I often forget the most simple things. Alexa helps our family stay on top of those activities that happen regularly by setting reminders. Always forget trash day? Have Alexa remind you! Tired of nagging the kids about bedtime? Have Alexa set a reminder. We have a reminder go off every weekday at 7:30 P.M. that says, “Last Call.” This is a reminder to the kids that the kitchen is closing so if they need a snack, drink or haven’t taken their vitamins yet, it’s time to take care of it. We also set a reminder for 8:00 P.M. to remind the kids screen time is up for the day and it’s time to plug their devices in outside their bedrooms. When the kids were doing virtual school during the pandemic, we set reminders to hep them self-manage their class load.

3. Announcements- If you have multiple Alexas in your house, like we do, this feature is awesome. Our house is pretty spread out and I don’t like yelling up to the kids or running all over the house to find everyone. This feature will make an announcement to all Alexas on your network. I mostly use this feature when dinner is ready and everyone comes running. Alexa even adds a dinner bell which is super fun. This is a one way communication. Those hearing the announcement cannot respond over Alexa. Also note: If you have more than one home and your devices are all on the same account, the announcement will happen in all places.

4. Drop In- This feature is similar to an announcement, but only goes to the Alexa you specify. Let’s say I want to let Ember know it’s almost time to leave for horseback riding and I know she is in her room. I can ask Alexa to, “Drop in on Ember’s Room.” It will ring a bell in Ember’s room and then I’m able to talk to her and she can respond back. When communication is over just ask Alexa to hang up. Note: You will need to know what you’ve named each device in the Alexa app for this to be effective.

5. Music- I love to listen to music and I’m also not super tech savvy. I love how simple it is to play music through Alexa. All you have to do is say, “Alexa play some music,” and she will. If you know a specific song or artist you’d like to hear you can ask for it by name and she will play it as long as it’s available. We have come across a few songs Alexa can’t play.

6. Games- One way we can get the kids to hang out after dinner and help clean up is to play games on Alexa while we do the dishes. There are many to choose from and some of our favorites are: Jeopardy, National Geographic Geo Quiz, Either Or, Are You Smarter than a 5th Grader?, Song Quiz, Trivia Battle and Harry Potter Trivia.

7. Audiobooks- We love to listen to books in our house and Alexa makes it so easy. After we read a book together at bedtime, the kids fall asleep to a book they’ve heard before. They set a sleep timer so it turns off automatically in 15-30 minutes. I like to listen to audiobooks while I fold laundry or tidy up the house. If you have an Audible Subscription all you have to ask Alexa is, “Listen to [book title] on Audible.”

8. Set up a Morning Routine- Alexa can even help you with your Miracle Morning! You can set up a routine on Alexa, so all you have to say is, “Alexa, start my day” and she will walk you through your morning routine. You can play different songs or add different skills at different times to use as part of your S.A.V.E.R.S. You can set up a meditation timer for your silence, play a song with embedded affirmations, play a soft song for visualization, and upbeat one for exercise, set it to play your audiobook for reading and finish with another soft song for your journaling practice. For specific directions on how to set it up CLICK HERE.

9. Jokes- Our kids love to tell jokes and make others laugh. Alexa has a jokes on all kids of different subjects and they’re all clean. My kids love to ask, “Alexa, tell me a joke” over and over again.

10. Answering Questions- My kids love to ask questions that I simply don’t know the answer to very quickly. For example, my daughter always wants to know how many days there are until the next holiday or her birthday. Luckily, Alexa has this information readily available. Instead of me pulling out my calendar and counting the days, Alexa will tell her. I am a terrible at spelling. If my kids ever ask me to spell something, I tell them to ask Alexa instead. I’m also not very good at math in my head, but Alexa is great at it! Alexa has also settled many debates in our household with her wealth of knowledge. No need to argue over something Alexa knows the answer to.

Some of these features, you probably already use, but I hope I shed some light on some new features or a different way to use them to help your family. I’m grateful for the technology that makes many tasks easier, so I can spend more time with my family and on my highest priorities. I’m grateful Alexa helps keep me on track, makes our mornings more fun with jokes and music and saves me time in locating my kids at home. I’m grateful how simple technology has become that even I can set these things up. I’d love to hear how you use Alexa in your home. Please join the conversation in our Facebook Community.

As an entrepreneur, I learned that it’s better to not recreate the wheel, but to model after someone who has already successfully done what you are hoping to do. As a new homeschooler, I heeded this same advice and found some great people to emulate. One such mentor is Julie Bogart from BraveWriter.com. I attended her conference and one thing she said really stuck with me and became my new motto. She said, “It's not that we think we can do school better at home, but that we can do HOME better than school. We must retool our understanding of home to support learning instead of replicating school.” It is my belief that humans are born with a love of learning. Babies are like little sponges. They learn to roll over, crawl, walk, talk and be in the world just by being themselves. Young children WANT to learn and they learn through play. It’s not until kids are in school for a few years that the love of learning is stripped from them through mind-numbing textbooks, limited real-world social interactions and decreased autonomy. Thankfully I know there are some truly innovative schools and teachers out there trying to change our school system, but for the most part public school has not changed since its inception during the Industrial Revolution. If you’d like to learn more about our personal reasons for choosing alternative education, CLICK HERE. 

I believe NOW is a great time to reimagine and co-create a beautiful learning experience at home. Learning at home doesn’t have to look or feel like school. Julie calls this “enchanted education” and it’s not something that can be manufactured or coerced, but it can be fostered and encouraged. My invitation to you, is to take this time to reconnect with your families and allow your kids to do some things they love and don’t always have time for when they are at school all day. Does your child lose track of time when they are skateboarding? Let them. Does your child love to read? Let them read as long as they want. Is there a subject they are really interested in? Find an online class on Outschool.com and let them dive in!

For your kids to fully buy-in, they have to be involved in the discussion! My encouragement is to sit down with each of your kids and come up with a schedule/rhythm together that they have a hand in creating. You can give them your input, but make sure they feel heard and that their ideas are taken into consideration. Our kids' world was just ripped out from under them and their sense of security has been shaken. Research shows that having consistency and a predictable routine can help kids get back that sense of security. If you need some more insights on the topic, check out this blog post by Amy McCready called Why Kids Need Routines. 

Before I list all the resources I’ve used personally with my kids, I also want to say don’t worry if you don’t use a single one. Give yourself and your kids some grace right now. Your world has also been turned upside down. If your kids don’t learn one more academic thing this whole school year, they will be okay! I think the most important thing we can do for ourselves and our kids right now is to just love them and spend as much time with them as we can. It really doesn’t take much time per day to accomplish academic learning especially when it’s focused (check out my friend Kalenna’s book The Five Hour School Week for more convincing of that). It also doesn’t take much time daily for our kids to feel our love. Parenting expert Amy McCready says it only takes 20 minutes a day of “Mind, Body & Soul” time to fill our kids attention buckets (so they don’t start seeking attention in destructive ways).

A great thing to know to help set up a great learning experience at home is how your child learns. CLICK HERE to download a free assessment to figure it out :) This may be a fun place to start. If you’re looking for some ideas of where to get started on the academic side, here are some websites/ programs we used when we were homeschooling or our kids use now at Acton Academy:

Reading and Writing

• BraveWriter.com 

• Lexia 

• Spelling Classroom

• Newsela

• Kahn Grammar

• Audible.com

• Learning Dynamics

• Books We Love

Math

• DreamBox

• Kahn Academy

• Aleks

• Education.com

Other Resources

• Outschool.com

• Pintrest

• Teachers Pay Teachers

• Free online college courses

• FamBundance Tools to help with family connection

• Help to set up a Morning Routine for kids

• Growth Mindset Tools

• Mindfulness Tools for kids

I’m grateful for technology that can keep us all connected during this weird time of social distancing. I’m grateful for all the brave healthcare workers on the front line of this pandemic. I’m grateful that we live in a time with so many options and that many of them are free or discounted currently to help support parents making this shift to educating at home for the time being. I’m here to support you, if you have any questions, I’m easy to find in our Facebook Community :) Stay safe everyone!

In Gratitude,

Lindsay

I first heard Hal Elrod speak about the Miracle Morning in 2014 at a 1 Life Fully Lived conference. On the plane ride home I devoured the book and was excited to start implementing it into my life. I realized I had been using my two small children (6 and 2 at the time) as an excuse for not pursuing my dreams. After hearing Hal speak, I realized that was just a cop out. As he says, “The moment you take 100 percent responsibility for everything in your life is the same moment you claim your power to change anything in your life. However, the crucial distinction is to realize that taking responsibility is not the same thing as accepting blame. while blame determines who is at fault for something, responsibility determines who is committed to improving a situation. It rarely matters who is at fault. All that matters is that you are committed to improving your situation.” My husband and I decided we were going to commit to the 30-day challenge.

That first night, we set our alarm clocks an hour before we typically wake up and were so excited for what the morning would bring. Our first morning was not miraculous. We woke to both of our children standing by our bedside before our alarm event went off. Needless to say, we were discouraged, but we weren’t ready to throw in the towel. The next morning, the same thing happened and then next. After some trial and error and our two year old daughter saying, “Mommy, I want to do what you’re doing,” we decided to invite them to join us for our S.A.V.E.R.S.

We taught them how to meditate and to say affirmations, they exercised with us, we read with them and gave them special journals in which they could draw their dreams and goals. It started to become my favorite part of the day. Once they realized we had expectations of them in the morning, they started to sleep in to their more regular time, which meant Mike and I could more easily wake up before them to secure our own oxygen masks before assisting them.

As we became more purposeful about the way we started our day, our household became more peaceful all the time, not just in the morning. As Mike and I were consistent about working on ourselves as human beings we noticed it rubbing off on our kids. It was truly magical! About a month into our experiment, our son, Tyler (6 at the time), said to me, “Mommy, I don’t get it. Why do I have to save my life every day?” Bless his sweet little literal heart. I explained to him that when Hal created this practice that it truly saved him from what he calls his second rock bottom, so that’s why he named it the life S.A.V.E.R.S. I truly love the creativity of children, so I told Tyler we could rename it and C.H.A.R.M.S. was born.

We started playing with the words of the S.A.V.E.R.S. At the time, Tyler was just learning his letters and Ember was 2, so all she could really do was scribble. Scribing was a pretty difficult task for them, so we decided to change that to CREATIVITY. The idea was they got their brains active in the morning and do something independent of mom and dad so we could accomplish our scribing at the same time. To accomplish this, the kids had to have free access to art supplies. We turned the corner of our kitchen into a creativity station for them. We stocked it with paper, markers, coloring books, stickers, paints and paintbrushes, PlayDoh and a dress up bin. They loved the autonomy and truly looked forward to their creativity time each morning.

Next, we wanted to expand on exercise to also include personal hygiene and a healthy breakfast, so we called this category, HEALTH. Our kids enjoyed having dance parties in the kitchen with us in the mornings, playing Simon Says, doing Cosmic Kids yoga, jumping on our mini trampoline, doing the 7 minute workout app and going on walks with us around the neighborhood. We wanted to use this as an opportunity to teach them about nutrition and what were healthy food choices and also develop good habits like getting themselves dressed on their own and brushing their teeth and hair consistently. We printed them out little checklists that had pictures of the tasks we wanted them to complete each day and it worked like a charm (no pun intended ;).

AFFIRMATIONS often feel really strange when you start them as an adult and they’ve made such a positive impact in my life that we had to include them for our kids. I suggest keeping them really simple for kids. Our kids created ABC affirmations that followed the alphabet. We made them little notebooks from legal sized paper we folded in half and stapled together. Each day for the first 26 days, they would choose a new word and then draw a picture that represented that word to them. We started with A and went all the way to Z. This was their creativity, affirmations and reading for the first month. Here is a video Tyler saying his ABC affirmations if you need some inspiration. 

Audible is our favorite way to listen to audiobooks :)

READING was another we couldn’t change. It’s so fundamental to becoming a life-long learner that we had to keep it. I think as parents we often read with our children at bedtime, but by then we’re tired and so are our kids and it can often be rushed. We started listening to audiobooks during breakfast and on our way to school. Audiobooks have truly changed our lives. I don’t often make time to pick up a physical book, but with audiobooks we can all be listening to the same information and doing something else like driving, dishes, laundry, exercising etc. Also, when started practicing the Miracle Morning, my kids were not yet reading independently, so audiobooks were the perfect way to allow them to have autonomy with reading. Some people think audiobooks are “cheating,” but in my opinion an audiobook is far superior to not reading at all.

Mike and I had already been practicing meditation for years before we discovered the Miracle Morning. To us, silence and visualizations were both part of meditation, so we combined those two S.A.V.E.R.S. and called it MEDITATION. In hindsight, I wish we had called this category mindfulness, because this is really what we want our children to grasp. We are always telling them to be aware of their surroundings. Children can actually teach us adults so much about being present in the moment. Also “meditation” for a child can look very different than what we think of as meditation as adults. We do a lot of things to help our kids increase their mindfulness skills, like walking meditations, listening to guided meditations, breath work, and sharpening their senses. 

The last of the C.H.A.R.M.S. is SERVICE. This is one we added because we wanted our kids to become servant leaders. We believe we all have inherent strengths and we are called to use them to make the world a better place. We also wanted our kids to know they are a valued member of the household and capable of helping out. Building this into their morning ritual means our kids are always looking for ways to be of service. I believe what we focus on expands, so if they are looking to be of service, that’s exactly what they will find. As they add value to their world they increase their intrinsic motivation to add even more. 

When we wrote the book, we didn’t realize that the C.H.A.R.M.S. are actually our family values. Also we intended it to be a morning ritual, but for us it has really turned into our lifestyle and helped me become a better parent. We have started asking our kids questions based on the C.H.A.R.M.S. in everyday situations and are intentionally reenforcing our family values to our kids on a daily basis.

• When they are having a sibling squabble, I can ask, “What creative solution can you come up with for this problem?”

• When they are doing something that isn’t good for their health, I can ask, “Is that a healthy choice?”

• When they do something that is in alignment with their daily affirmations, I can reinforce it to them by saying, “Wow, you really are POLITE, Ember. I loved the way you asked for that snack by saying please.”

• Since we often listen to audiobooks in the car together, I can pull lessons from those books to help me explain something to my kids. For example, we listened to the book Wonder. If you haven’t read it, it’s a wonderful story about a boy named Auggie who is born with a severe facial anomaly. Many people are frightened by him, but in the end he becomes accepted and loved by his peers. Soon after reading this book, we met Nick Santonastasso. He was born with no legs and only one arm with one finger. At first, Ember was afraid of him, but I reminded her about Auggie’s story and how Nick is the same on the inside and has feelings too. This helped her shift her mindset and soon she was happy to pose for a picture with him and even shake his finger. For more books we love, check out this page.

• Meditation has also become a tool we can draw on in times of stress. Recently, Tyler cut his finger and he had to get stitches. As the nurse was putting the needle of numbing agent into his thumb, he was taking deep breaths to calm himself down. She made a comment about what a great job he was doing and he casually commented, “Well, I’ve been practicing meditation since I was 4 years old.” It was certainly a proud momma moment for me!

• Of all the C.H.A.R.M.S., service is probably my favorite and instead of me asking the question, it’s usually the kids who will ask me, “Mom, what can I do for service today?” This is my opportunity to ask them for help and for them to feel valued. They now will gladly help me with laundry, cleaning, dishes, feeding the dog, picking up and many other household chores that just need to get done. 

I’m grateful for Hal for creating the original Miracle Morning and taking a chance on us to write the parents and families version. I’m grateful for my husband, Mike, who is always so supportive of my dreams and for taking the time to really get on the same page with parenting while writing this book together. I’m grateful for my kids who are always my greatest teachers and my inspiration to become the best version of myself. I’m grateful for my readers who have been inspired to make changes in their lives and are causing a ripple effect that will elevate the consciousness of humanity one morning at a time. 

In Gratitude, 

Lindsay

Recently I got some coaching from Julie Bogart on her Ask Julie: A BraveWriter Podcast on the subject of technology and screen time. As parents, I think we all worry about our kids technology use and safety while online. We are the first generation of parents who have had to deal with this particular problem to this magnitude and I think we’re all just trying to figure it out and do the best we can with the tools available to us. In that light, I thought I’d write a blog post about what we do in our family and how I’ve integrated some of Julie’s suggestions.

I believe creating boundaries for ourselves and our kids around technology is a good idea. Many games and online platforms are intentionally designed to stimulate the reward centers in our brains and are, in fact, addictive. In addition, our children’s brains are still developing, so we cannot expect them to be able to self-regulate their screen usage all on their own.

Our now 10 year old, Tyler, was 18 months old when we got our first iPad. At that time, it was our parenting silver bullet! If he was acting up at a restaurant, we handed him the iPad. If I was on the phone and he was wanting my attention, I handed him the iPad. If he was bored at the grocery store, I’d hand him my phone. If I didn’t give him any transition time and he threw a fit because I scooped him up to put him in the car, I’d hand him his iPad. In any number of situations, I’d simply hand him an iPad and peace was restored :) I thought I had this parenting thing down, until a couple years later when studies started coming out about how damaging iPads were to brain development. I knew we had to make some serious changes.

Much of parenting for us, comes down to family values and modeling. One thing we are very clear on in our house are our family values and we intentionally make decisions based on them. I love this quote from this article, “How does technology fit into that value," she said. "So, does that mean that mom and dad get to be looking at their social media or texting during dinner? Because that’s modeling for your kids. It’s very easy to tell our kids to turn off devices and stop looking at their social media, when in fact, we adults are pretty culpable for all of the screen time stuff.”

One question I had for Julie on the podcast was, “I’m all for technology. It’s a great tool, but I’m just trying to find that happy balance between still enjoy reading and being outside and all the other things we love to do and figure out where do we draw the line?” Julie helped me change my mindset about my kids technology use and instead of viewing it with dread, fear and anxiety; I could get more involved and curious about the videos they are watching and create more shared experiences through technology with them.

We still have boundaries set around electronics, but I’ve become more flexible in letting my kids try new things. For example, before chatting with Julie, I was afraid to let Tyler play FortNite. I had heard bad things about the game and how addictive it can be and that fear held me back from allowing him to try it. This, of course, only made him want to play it even more and led to power struggles. While visiting some family friends, I allowed Tyler play FortNite with their son. Much to my surprise, he noticed a change in his friends behavior and was really turned off by the game. When we returned home, he had no interest in playing it anymore, so all my fears were for no reason. All Tyler likes about the game is the dances :)

That experience gave me confidence that our family values really were rubbing off on our kids. Tyler had been begging for years to start a YouTube channel and I was always afraid to let him. I was finally ready to let him try and I’m so glad I did! It has opened up some many “juicy conversations,” as Julie would call them. We’ve had talks about being safe online, what content is appropriate to put online and what is not, and online bullying. Tyler has also had brainstorm sessions about the videos he wants to make, he’s learned how to edit his videos, he’s researching kick-starter and shopify so he can start selling merchandise to promote his YouTube channel and he’s become more and more confident in front of a camera and in general. He has set goals around how many subscribers he wants to have and is constantly taking making strides towards that goal. He is so proud of his channel and loves to share it with everyone he meets. If you’d like to subscribe, you can find him HERE.

Get your own Dot :)

The Miracle Morning has helped us create technology boundaries in our house. We have a family rule that there is no screen time before C.H.A.R.M.S. or S.A.V.E.R.S. are done (this goes for Mom and Dad too). We view technology as a tool, so if you are going to use it to listen to a meditation for silence, do a workout for exercise, listen to an audiobook for reading, or use the 5-minute journal app for scribing then that is perfectly acceptable. The kids get 2 hours of screen time a day. They are in charge of keeping track of their own screen time and how they divvy it up between their devices (iPad, computer, TV, video games, etc). They usually use our Amazon Echo to keep track of their time. To make it easier for them, they set it to 30 minute increments and they know they get four of those. Since we homeschool, they kids also can’t get on their electronics until their school work is done. Occasionally, I will assign things on a computer, so, if I do, it doesn’t count against their screen time. After talking with Julie, we also added that if we decided to watch something as a family, which creates a shared experience, that also doesn’t “count” towards the kids screen time. We also have a family rule that no electronics are allowed at the dinner table. The kids also have an Echo Dot in their bedrooms, so they can listen to audiobooks at bedtime without a device present because devices are not allowed in their rooms. One of our family values is we are Transformation Seekers- we are continually curious about how we can collectively and individually be our best. We believe starting our day with the Miracle Morning is one way we can bring out the best in ourselves and this is how we explain to our kids why C.H.A.R.M.S. must come before electronics and why we model that behavior ourselves.

I know that our family values may not be the same as your family’s, but I think two things are really important when creating some boundaries around electronics. Number one, allow the kids to have some autonomy and number two, model the behaviors you’d like to encourage in your kids.

I’m grateful for technology and the opportunities it’s created for connection in my life. I’m grateful that I can be a positive role model for my kids in this arena and that they can also teach me new things. I’m grateful we have clearly defined family values and that they help guide us in making decisions. Does your family have boundaries around technology? I’d love for you to join the conversation in our The Miracle Morning for Parents and Families Facebook Community!

In Gratitude,

Lindsay

The first day of the event is called Entrepreneur Day, so the speakers on day one have more of a business focus and the people in the room are all business owners. The fist speaker on Friday was JJ Virgin. She is a celebrity nutrition expert, has 4 NY Times best sellers, hosts a podcast and has appeared on TV many times over.  She talked to us about nutrition and about building a personal brand. My favorite idea I took from her talk was a brain dump technique she uses when brainstorming ideas. She calls it the Now, Not Now and Never list. It’s great to do with post-its. Write one idea per sticky note for 10-15 minutes. Then you can easily move them into the Now, Not Now and Never Categories.

The next speaker was Chris Ducker. He is a UK based serial entrepreneur, author, speaker, podcaster, vlogger and founder of Youpreneur.com. He could easily be a comedian because he had us laughing his entire talk. He spoke to us about creating a personal brand and how to build, market and monetize the business of you. I love that he emphasized a strengths-based approach to building a business around you, but not dependent on you. He told us to become more self-aware and work on your strengths then delegate your weaknesses. He also encouraged us to not compare ourselves to others and become someone’s favorite. When we do this, we will attract the best and repel the rest.

After lunch, we got to hear from Chandler Bolt. He is a 6 time best selling author, podcaster and founder and CEO of Self Publishing School where he has helped thousands of people write and launch their books. We used his mind-mapping technique when we wrote The Miracle Morning for Parents and Families and  I highly recommend his service if you’re thinking about writing your own book.

The last speaker of the day was Christopher Lochhead. He is a retired 3-time public company CMO who now spends his time writing best selling books, hosting the top rated podcast Follow Your Different, surfing and spending time at home with his wife and their chickens. Christopher is a master storyteller and it was so much fun to hear Jon Berghoff interview him. Christopher told us that for him entrepreneurship was not a way up, but a way out. He shared a story about a company called Jon’s Crazy Socks. The owner of that company has Down’s Syndrome and 30% of the employees are differently abled individuals. John’s father said, “No one else would give John an opportunity that would fulfill his need to be creative” and that is why they started this company. Christopher says, “It’s what makes us different the makes the biggest difference.” He encouraged us to not just make incremental change in our lives and businesses, but exponential leaps and to fall in love with the problems we are solving in the world.

Saturday was the first day the BYEB event and we got to hear from the one and only Dr. Sean Stephenson. If you don’t know who Dr. Sean is, check out the video. He shared with us that happy people all have 3 things in common. They focus on what they DO want, they are grateful for what they DO have and they focus on what they DO like. He also gifted us with what he calls the Unstoppable Formula. First we have to rid ourselves of our insecurities. He says the cure for insecurity is self-care. Next we have to connect with our life purpose. Ask yourself, “Why was I born?” His answer is to rid the world of insecurities and recognizes that his condition is part of his mission. Lastly, we have to create an empowering environment by surrounding ourselves with positivity. ONE negative person can derail everything you’ve worked to create.

Something unique to this event, is that it’s also a fundraiser for the Front Row Foundation. After each speaker, they often auction off extra time with them either on a zoom call or to have lunch or dinner with them. Dr. Sean was so much fun that I really wanted to meet him in person, so I bid to have lunch with him and 5 other lucky attendees. At lunch we were able to ask him any questions we wanted to and the conversation was amazing. The conversation was a very intimate and vulnerable one, so I won’t share most of it here. One thing I took away from that lunch that I can share is the snorkeler vs scuba diver analogy. In conversation, some people are like snorkelers. They just want to stay on the surface where it’s safe and warm and they get to see the pretty fish. Others are like scuba divers. They aren’t afraid to go deep, get outside their comfort zone and hunt for treasure. He gave us a word of caution as we go back into our day to day lives- you can’t force a snorkeler to be a scuba diver or you can metaphorically kill them. I’m grateful everyone at our lunch was a scuba diver and that we found gold!

After lunch we heard from world-renowned mindfulness expert Julianna Raye. She walked us through an approach to meditation called Unified Mindfulness where you focus on and note what you see, hear and feel. She explained the 3 skills we are working on when we make this a daily practice. They are concentration power (being able to focus on what you want to), sensory clarity (being able to separate what we see, hear and feel) and equanimity (being able to allow our senses to come and go like waves and not holding on to any one for too long).

The last speaker of the day was Dr. Kelly Flanagan. He is an author, speaker, podcaster, licensed clinical psychologist and co-founder of Artisan Clinical Associates in Naperville, IL. You may have read Dr. Flanagan’s “letter form the makeup isle” to his daughter that went viral. He talked to us about our ego and gave us a new way to look at it. We are all born worthy and whole. Somewhere along the way, we experience shame and start to hide our true self inside what Dr. Flanagan calls the ego castle. First the walls go up so we can hid. Next we install the cannons so we have a way to hurt before we are hurt. Lastly we build a throne of arrogance and perfection. We think, if we look perfect on the outside we can sit safely inside on our throne. The only way we can let people in to see our true selves is to lower our drawbridge. This can only be done by the inside; it requires vulnerability and is the only way to experience true human connection with another.

Day 2 of BYEB after Brotha James, we got to hear from the amazing Patricia Moreno. She was once at the top of her field and a fitness star, but felt out of integrity. She knew she was living and selling a lie. She decided there had to be a better way and made it her mission to find the answer. She created the intenSati method and is now helping people truly love themselves. She took us through a session that combines affirmations with exercise to really anchor them into your body. She then had us pair up and look deep into another human’s eyes and tell them how wonderful they truly are. It was a beautiful moment that left many (myself included) in tears of joy. It was like Miracle Morning on steroids and I believe we should all be starting our days with Patricia’s method. I can’t wait to share it with my kids. I also signed up for her Sati365 program for 2019 and am super excited about it!

The last speaker was our own personal Jesus (inside joke), Garrett Gunderson. He is the founder of Wealth Factory, a speaker, the best-selling author of Killing Sacred Cows and he can often be seen on TV talking about money. He wants us to get out of the old thinking of working hard and saving your money. He says that type of thinking is playing the game to lose and doesn’t work. The next phase is playing to win, but many people get stuck in this hustle and grind mentality that destroys our most important assets- our physical health and our relationships. He says to be truly wealthy we need to win and then play. He gave the example of the Super Bowl. We don’t even know who is playing in that game, but it’s already sold out and all the TV ad space has been sold. It’s already profitable before the game is even played. We need to sell our products before they are even created. Get buy-in before we create new services. The best way to increase our wealth is to invest in our mental capital and our relationship capital. We have to be able to bring something to the table.

The event ended with us having time to work on our 2019 goals and sharing them in groups of 3. When we write our goals down and then speak them out loud they are much more likely to get done. I’m grateful for Hal and Jon for their authenticity and the tribe of like-hearted people they attract to this event every year. I’m grateful I invested in my mental and relationship capital that weekend and got to catch up with some amazing friends and meet some new amazing people. I’m grateful that next year kids will be invited to this event to have a parallel experience. I’m grateful to be able to support the Front Row Foundation and the amazing work they do in the world.

In Gratitude,

Lindsay

I get this questions a lot and the short answer is YES, but you may have to modify it slightly and pretty please LISTEN TO YOUR BODY! If you have a baby that is not yet sleeping through the night, I cannot in good conscious encourage you to get up any earlier than you have to. At this stage of the game, you need all the sleep you can get and more than likely you are sleep deprived. Our bodies need sleep. Overnight, bits and pieces of information are transferred from more tentative, short-term memory to stronger, long-term memory in a process called "consolidation." This is one reason why many new moms can’t seem to remember things- commonly referred to a “Mommy Brain.” It’s a real thing and caused by sleep depravation and also physical changes to your brain that accompany parenthood. So, as much as you can, get the rest your body needs.

The good news about babies is that they sleep a lot, so one strategy new moms can adopt is to do your Miracle Morning during your baby’s first nap of the day. This may be a little later than before you had the baby, but I think the power of the S.A.V.E.R.S. is in practicing them and not to be so hung up on what time of day. You may have to shorten your practice during this stage of parenthood and that’s okay (I promise they will sleep through the night eventually). Babies grow up so quickly, so savor the time with your little bundle of joy.

Another strategy is to break up your S.A.V.E.R.S. throughout the day. My son, Tyler, really only took cat naps when he was a baby, so when he slept I would take that time to do a mini workout, catch up on some reading or write in my journal. My friends Natalie Sager and Lindsay Ambrose have written a wonderful book for new moms called Peaceful Mama: The Mind, Body and Baby Connection: The Manifesto of Conscious Motherhood. They talk about creating “MAMAHH Moments” throughout the day to become more centered and present. I highly recommend this book for new mommas :)

I love how this dad chooses to calm down his baby with the sound of OM :)

A third option is to do your S.A.V.E.R.S. while feeding the baby. Tyler was an easily distracted while nursing, so I was often away from others in a quiet room. This is the perfect environment for many of the S.A.V.E.R.S. You can meditate, visualize, listen to affirmations on ThinkUp App, listen to an audiobook and even do a little scribing with the help of the 5 Minute Journal App all while nursing a baby. I’ll admit, it’s not easy, but it can be done. I love this article about tips for meditating with a baby. The only thing you can’t really do while nursing is exercise, but you burn up to 500 calories a day while nursing so it’s kind of like working out :)

As a former college athlete, I had a really hard time slowing down after my C-Section with Tyler, but it was necessary. If your doctor says to take a break for 6 weeks, do yourself a favor and listen. I tried to start back too soon and set myself back even longer. Here are some ideas for exercising with a baby:

• Take baby for a walk in a carrier or stroller. If you have a jogging stroller (and you’ve been cleared by your doctor) you can go out for a run.

• Google “Workout with Baby at Home” and many relevant YouTube videos will be at your fingertips and most require no equipment except your baby :)

• Join a post-natal yoga class. This is a great way to get some gentle exercise and meet some other local new mommas.

• Many gyms offer childcare. Take advantage of it! Drop the baby with their lovely staff and hit your favorite workout class or weight room. Some do have age limits, so be sure to check with them beforehand :) At my gym it was 6 weeks old (which was perfect since I wasn’t allowed to workout until then anyway).

I’d love to hear what your tips and tricks are for getting your S.A.V.E.R.S. in with a baby around. If you haven’t already, please join the conversation in our Facebook Community. I’m grateful for all the ambitious parents out there wanting to stick with or start a Miracle Morning practice with a baby in the mix, you all inspire me so much. I’m grateful my kids got an early start having their own morning ritual and that it will hopefully serve them well in their lives. I’m grateful for Lindsay and Natalie, their friendship and for their courage to share their stories in Peaceful Mama.

In Gratitude,

Lindsay

In Pitch Like a Girl, Ronna Lichtenberg writes, “The purpose of visioning, then, is to move yourself toward a bigger, deeper desire- a truer, more satisfying win.

It’s a scary proposition for most of us. Yes is almost always scarier than no. Think of it this way: If you confide in me about your biggest, most heart-felt dream and I tell you that maybe you’re a little too bigheaded and you shouldn’t aim so high, you may be a little pissed off. But you’ll probably also find it kind of comforting to make the target less ambitious and a whole lot easier to reach. If, on the other hand, I say to you, “You’re looking at a hill, which is fine, but you should be looking at the peak of Mount Kilimanjaro because you are capable of climbing it,” that’s scary. It’s scary because a big vision raises the possibility of a failure that feels like real failure. This is where the tummy-churning fear we talked about comes in.” We are all capable of much more than we give ourselves credit for and I am living proof of that.

In 2008, I summited Mt. Kilimanjaro in Tanzania, Africa along with my husband and eleven other friends. At the time, I was 4 months pregnant with our son, Tyler. I found out I was pregnant after we had already put down a non-refundable deposit for the trip and I had gotten all the shots I needed to go to Africa. I was in good health and my pregnancy was not high risk, so my doctors left the decision up to me. They told me there aren't any studies about the effects of high altitude on a fetus and said, "the baby is like a parasite, he will get what he needs; if anything, you will suffer more of the effects." I was not allowed to take any medication to help the effects of altitude sickness or preventative medication for malaria, but I chose to go on this once-in-a-lifetime adventure and I have never regretted that decision. The lessons I learned and the beauty I witnessed on the hike and safari far outweigh the risks in my opinion, especially since Tyler was born super healthy.

At 19,341 feet, Kilimanjaro is the highest peak in Africa and the fourth highest in the world; however, it is unique among the seven summits because it's the only one you don't need any special equipment (ropes) in order to climb. To get to the top, all you really need is the will to do it, the means to get there and some level of physical fitness. Over the seven day hike, I learned some great lessons about life in general that I’d like to share with you:

This is an old version of Brotha James singing Slow Down. To check out his evolution check out his new album Abracadabra https://itunes.apple.com/us/artist/brotha-james/952760757

1. Slow Down- In Swahili, there is a saying you hear a lot while hiking Mt. Kilimanjaro, “Pole, Pole.” It means, “slow, slow.” Often our guides told us to slow down to conserve our energy for summit day. The air thins as you ascend the mountain making it more difficult to breathe along with other symptoms of altitude sickness include vomiting, diarrhea, headaches, suppression of appetite and hallucinations. In episode 152 of the Achieve Your Goals Podcast, The author of The Miracle Morning, Hal Elrod, discussed some of the lessons he’s learning as he fights a rare form of cancer. One of the most important is to slow down to enjoy the journey. When our lives are full to the brim with things that keep us “busy” it’s hard to truly be present and keep our focus on the things that are truly important. Our good buddy Brotha James also has an amazing song on this topic. 
2. Be Prepared- To hike a 19,341-foot mountain, you have to do at least a little training. The days are pretty grueling and if you’ve never hiked before, the chances you will make it to the top are pretty slim. Another cool thing about Kili is that you pass through five distinct climates on the way up. As the hike begins, you pass through a beautiful rainforest with monkeys swinging from the trees and beautiful flowers all around. Naturally in the rainforest, you need to be prepared for rain. It’s the first day of the hike, so if all your gear gets soaked you will most likely be pretty miserable for the remainder of the hike. At the summit, you are standing on top of a glacier and it's literally freezing, so you need to be prepared for that as well. When hiking, you need to make sure you have the right gear and dress in layers because the weather is unpredictable. You also have to keep in mind that you have to carry it all, so you want to try to find harmony between being prepared and not taking on too much weight. In life, the more purposeful we are with our actions and the things we keep around us, the happier we will be. This goes for the company we keep, the foods we choose to eat, where we live and the things we buy. When we can clear the mental and physical clutter we give ourselves space to allow our dreams to come to fruition.
3. Get a Guide- When you hike a big mountain (or attempt anything in life you’ve never done before), it is prudent to go with someone who has done it before or at the very least a buddy. We went with REI Adventures when we hiked Kili and our guides and porters were amazing. The crew would take our bigger bag ahead for us to the next campsite and prepare all our meals. All we had to worry about was putting one foot in front of the other and staying hydrated. Our guide was with us the whole time pointing out native plants and giving us information about what to expect, giving us pointers and encouraging us to conserve energy. I have a coach named Jenai Lane, Founder of Spirit Coach Training. Her guidance has been invaluable in my spiritual evolution and living the life of my dreams. I highly recommend getting a coach or accountability partner of your own to help keep you on track. Any dream you have, there are people already living that dream. Learn from them, model their behavior, and surround yourself with people on a similar journey.
4.  
5. Celebrate Your Accomplishments- At the end of our Kili hike, our guides held a celebration for us. If you make it to either Gillman’s Point (18,640 ft) or Uhuru Peak (19,341 ft), they give you a certificate with your name, time of summit and age. Since I was pregnant and we already knew the baby was a boy and his name would be Tyler, we asked our guides if we could get a certificate for him too. They obliged and we hung it up in his nursery along with a picture of Mike and I in front of the iconic mountain and animal pictures from our safari. It was nice to pause after a hard journey to take it all in and celebrate that accomplishment. In Jon Vroman’s book, The Front Row Factor, he documents some lessons his wish organization has learned about living life from those fighting for theirs. One of those lessons it to Celebrate our Experiences. He writes, “No matter what happens, we can always choose to celebrate what we learn, and therefore turn every failure into a valuable life lesson. Celebrations don’t always have to be our favorites, but they can be favorable.” Some people in our party did not make it to the top, but we still celebrated their journey. The journey was not easy and there are no showers for a week, so we were all kind of stinky and tired and we still found the energy to celebrate. So many times we just move from one thing to the next and don't take the time to savor our wins. Everyday we have things we can celebrate. When we are filled with gratitude and are present to the small moments is when we truly recognize how sweet life really is. 
6. The View from the Top is Amazing and Fleeting- On summit day, we started from Kibo hut (15,420 ft) around midnight after about 4 hours of restless sleep. You hike by headlamp (or in our case the light of the full moon). It is freezing and you’re hiking on scree (a slope covered with small loose stones) so each step you take up you slip back about a half step. It is very slow going. After a few hours you reach Gillman’s point where you take a break and have something warm to drink. The sun is still not up, but you’re past the scree and back on a solid path. At this point, there is still about 1,000 vertical feet until the summit. You’re so close but you feel so far away. This is also when altitude sickness kicks into high gear. As we made our way to the summit, the sun finally came up, which gave us renewed energy and was the most beautiful sunrise I've ever witnessed. After a few more hours of hiking, the summit is within view. Once your reach the summit, you may wait a few minutes for others in your group, but it’s hard to move up there. It’s cold and windy and the air is hard to breathe, so you don’t stay on top long. This happens in life too. No matter how successful you are, there is someone waiting in the wings to take the top spot. We constantly have to evolve and continue to grow and adapt to keep up. There is always a next step, another level to reach and improvement to be made. Life is a journey and not a destination, so enjoy the view when you're on top, celebrate your wins, slow down so you can savor it and don't become complacient. 

Prep hike in CO

Backpacking trip to train for Kili

Our group about to start our acsent

Day 1- Rainforest

Day 2 in the hut

Day 3 acclimatization hike

Day 4 hike to Kibo Hut

Summit Day- Gillman’s Point. Only 1,000 more feet! Note: this picture was taken on the way down (on the way up it was still dark when we got here).

Most welcomed sunrise ever!

Kilimanjaro Glaciers

Uhuru Peak

receiving our certificates

Time to celebrate!

I had the privilege to hear Kim Hess speak at our FamBundace retreat last winter and I love her message. Kim has completed 6 of the 7 summits and also has plans to trek to the north and south poles to become the 13th woman in the world and if all goes to plan, the youngest woman to ever complete the Explorers Grand Slam. If you ever feel like your dreams are too big, think again and then go bigger! You are the only one that can get in your way to the top. 

I’m grateful for the experience I had climbing Mt. Kilimanjaro and the many lessons I learned on that journey. I’m grateful Tyler was born healthy and strong and with a really cool story. I’m grateful to spend half of my time surrounded by beauty of the Rocky Mountains that serve as a reminder to the lessons I’ve learned about life from hiking. I’m grateful to our guides for keeping us safe and well feed on our journey.

In Gratitude,

Lindsay

Something I find helpful when visioning is to create a vision board. Every year, I make a vision board of my intentions for that year. We sometimes make this a family activity and everyone makes their own. I have discovered that when we make one for the family, it's not as powerful. When it's a joint vision it gives your brain permission to say it's not really your vision. It is not only a great family activity, but it truly primes the subconscious mind to attract that vision. The reason vision boards are so powerful (and affirmations for that matter) is related to the way our brains are wired.

We each have a loose network of neurons in our brains called the reticular activating system (RAS). The RAS alters information so your senses do not become overloaded and helps bring relevant information to your attention. For example, you might be driving on the highway and pass several speed limit signs but not notice any of them at all. When you pass a police officer and want to make sure you are driving the speed limit, you start to notice them every mile. This is your RAS at work. Advertisers keenly play to this system in their marketing. So, what if you created the perfect advertisement for the life you want and consciously programmed your mind through your RAS to help attract it? That is exactly what a vision board is, an advertisement for your ideal life!

Creating a vision board is simple, even a kid can do it. All you have to do is gather up some magazines, cut out the images that speak to your heart and paste them onto your board. If you lack clarity of vision, it can be fun to let the universe select your images for you. Clear your mind with a meditation then let a page number come to mind. Turn to that page and cut out whatever speaks to you to include on your board. It’s okay to include material things on a vision board, but I’d advise you to let this be more about who you want to become and the experiences you want to have than what you want to own. The things we own can sometimes start to own us, and you can’t take them with you in the end anyway. Try to tap into the emotions or the symbolism behind the images more than the literal interpretation of them. In Tyler's vision board, he had a lot of "stuff" he wanted. For example, I asked him about the M & M's. He said it was all the candy he wanted to get for Halloween (a very age appropriate answer). I encouraged him to "reframe" the candy to be a quality he'd like to posses such as abundance or sweetness/ kindness. I also asked him about the piggy bank and he said he wanted to be rich, so I asked him what he'd do with that money? I invited him to think about all the problems he could solve with that money to get him to think about what kind of contribution he wants to make in the world.   

I'd like to tell you a story of how I manifested our dream house using a visioning process. In 2011, Mike and I decided it was time to move from our small townhouse to a bigger house with a yard for the dogs and more rooms so we could expand our family. Our townhouse sold in 2 weeks, so we moved into a 2 bedroom apartment while we searched for our dream house. Four months later we were still living in that apartment and growing frustrated with the search. My coach, Jenai Lane of Spirit Coach Training, encouraged me to draw our dream house "from Spirit." She invited me to tap into the feelings the house would bring me and had me "see" some symbols that would represent the qualities of the home. In my mind's eye, I saw a 3-tiered fountain, so when I drew my house, I added that feature. 

Mike and I decided we needed a break from our search, so we went to visit some friends in Colorado. While we were there, I decided to jump online to see if there were any new listings. To my surprise, the first house I looked at had a picture of a 3-tiered fountain! I called Mike in to look at the house and he liked it too. We immediately called our realtor and asked him to go look at it for us. Later that day, he confirmed that this may be the house we were looking for. We asked him to put in an offer for us (sight unseen) because we knew the house would not last (the house was priced under market value). The seller accepted our offer and we were officially homeowners!  

Our first stop when we returned from CO was "the new house." As soon as we walked in the front door, I felt at home and I knew we had made a good decision. We moved in March 2012 and as we were unpacking, I came across a vision board from 2011. To my amazement, in the top right-hand corner was a 3-tiered fountain. Somewhere in my subconscious, I had been storing that image and the qualities of peace that attracted me to that photo in the first place. It just took a  purposeful visioning process to bring that image back into my conscious mind to help me find the perfect house for our family. The only thing the house didn't have was a fence for the dogs (which was pretty easy to add) and a great entertaining space. We ended up moving the fountain outside to the garden and renovated that (pretty much useless) room to create a welcoming space to entertain family and friends. 

I'm grateful for the power of my subconscious mind and the way vision boards have helped me harness that power to create the life of my dreams. I'm grateful for my coach Jenai and the guidance she has given me over the years. I'm grateful for our home and the many memories we have created there. I'm grateful for you and would love to hear your experiences with vision boards. Please visit us in our Facebook Community to join the conversation.

In Gratitude, 

Lindsay

The old school thought of allowance is to use it as a reward system to get your children to do chores or behave. I do not prescribe to this thought process. I like to use allowance to teach Tyler and Ember money skills and our family values instead of as a reward. They still do chores as part of their Miracle Morning C.H.A.R.M.S. (for Service). I call them family contributions and all members of the household are expected to chip in with no reward. The problem I see with attaching allowance to chores is that it hurts the internal motivation of the child to help without a reward and it creates an employee mentality (I have to work harder to earn more money).

Growing up, my parents would not let me get a job. They also did not give me an allowance, but whenever I needed money for something (within reason) they would just give it to me. I didn’t get any real money experience, however, until college. By then, I was on a scholarship and received a stipend for my housing, dining, and books. I had to pay my rent and utilities, buy a meal plan (or groceries) and purchase my books for my classes out of the money I was given each month. This was the first time in my life I actually had to manage my money and honestly, I felt rich!

To be clear, I was nowhere near wealthy, but I felt that way because my stipend was more than I needed so I had enough money to go out with friends, buy gas for my car, and go shopping. In my junior year, a professor submitted my name in for an additional scholarship and I received a check in the mail for $1500. Since I didn’t really need the money, I used it to go on a cruise. In my senior year, I was in a car accident with a tractor-trailer and walked away unscathed. My friend was driving her car, so my car was fine too. The trucking company offered us a settlement because they were afraid we were going to sue them. I got $5,000 in the settlement. Again, I didn’t need the money, so I gave it to my brother to put a down payment on a house and he paid me back later. All these experiences shaped my mindset about money and I grew up believing money was readily available and came to me easily. I think these beliefs served me well in my life because this is still my experience.

I want our kids to have these beliefs too and I want to give them these beliefs intentionally. I want them to work smarter, not harder and I can teach them that with allowance. Our kids get $15 each week for allowance and they have to break it up into 3 categories- spending, save to invest, and giving. The default setting for these buckets is 50% to spend ($7), 30% save to invest ($5), and 20% to give ($3). Buckets for allowance are nothing new, but the twist we have on it is the way we set up our buckets also teaches our kids our family values and an entrepreneurial money mindset.

We value contribution, which is why we have a giving bucket. The kids can choose how they spend their giving money. Currently, Tyler gives $20 per month to Save the Children. Ember gives $5 per month to The Human Rights Campaign. Our 9-year-old recently figured out that his $20 per month was not sustainable with his current level of giving money and told us he wanted to change his buckets to be 33% each so he could continue giving the $20 a month (proud Momma moment!)

We also value making our money work for us (or as I like to call it, Mailbox Money), which is why they have a save to invest bucket vs. a save to spend bucket. They are not allowed to touch this money unless they want to use it to start a business or put into an investment (stocks, real estate, etc.). We want to teach our kids that when you do it right, your money works for you and not the other way around. We want them to believe they are valued just for being themselves, which is why we don’t attach any strings to their allowance. Even if their behavior was awful, they still get the same amount of allowance. Even if they didn’t do any of their chores, they still get the same amount of allowance. There are other privileges they can lose, like screen time instead ;).

We also value a growth mindset and want them to have money of their own to spend so they can learn from their mistakes. We want them to see what it feels like to not have enough money for something they want and having to delay gratification. We want them to make mistakes with their money now while they are young and the consequences are relatively inconsequential. We want them to have the satisfaction of saving their spend money for something big and splurging. We want them to understand the value of their money and start planning ahead and making choices about what is important enough to spend their own precious dollars on. It also helps them with their math skills. Money is a great motivator to want to understand basic arithmetic. 

As entrepreneurs and purposeful parents, we are always looking for things to make our lives easier and leverage technology to our advantage, and allowance is no exception. If you’ve read our book, The Miracle Morning for Parents and Families, you may know we used to literally have jars of money for each bucket. There is an advantage to this- the kids get to actually see the money go in and out of the jars so it’s not so abstract for them. However, for the parents, it’s a lot to manage! I don’t carry a lot of cash these days, so it was a pain to have to remember to have cash on hand to dispense allowance each week and I would often go weeks without giving them an allowance. Then we found an app called FamZoo and our lives have been simplified!

With this app, you can set up their buckets and it will automatically dispense their allowance for you. It’s not real money (although you can get your kids a debit card through FamZoo attached to your bank account that would be real money if you think they are ready for that option), but numbers in their “account.” It looks a lot like looking at your bank accounts online. This app also solves the problem of your kids losing their wallets (which each of our kids has done at least once). Now when we are in a store and one of the kids wants to buy something, all I have to do is pull out my phone and show them their balance in the app. It will also automatically update it on my husband's phone (as long as you are logged into the same account), so if they are out with him, he has an updated balance too. This is not a free app, but in my opinion, it’s well worth the cost to never have to remember to distribute allowance and to have my kids money at the tap of a button. With money getting more digitized every year, I think it’s good for them to get used to the idea of their money just being numbers on a device.

I’m grateful for the money skills we are passing on to our kids and being able to help shape their relationship with money through allowance. I’m grateful for finding FamZoo and how easy it is to use and the problems it has solved for our family when it comes to allowances. I’m grateful to my parents for the money beliefs they gave me (even if it was inadvertently). I’d love to hear your thoughts and what has worked for your family. Please join our community of like-hearted families in our Facebook Community.

In Gratitude,

Lindsay

Our daughter, Ember, was 2 when we started practicing Miracle Morning with her, so I know from experience it can indeed be done- you just have to be a little more flexible. My first piece of advice is to make it exciting for them. We allowed her to decorate a box that is her special Miracle Morning box that she only uses for this purpose. We took her to the store and let her pick out a special notebook, a coloring book and coloring supplies to keep in her box. We also created an art station in the corner of our kitchen. This way she is able to access paper, crayons, paints, stickers, play dough, glue, and other coloring books all by herself. This allows her to have autonomy in to get started on her Miracle Morning without any help from us.

My second piece of advice is to start slow and easy and then add on. With our kids, the first thing we did for Miracle Morning was to create a homemade ABC affirmation book for each of them. It’s really easy (even if you’re not a DIYer). Simply get 14 sheets of legal-sized paper, fold them in half and staple to bind. If you’re worried the staples may harm your little one, get a piece of Duct tape and cover them up. If you want to get fancy, use one piece of legal-sized card stock for the cover. If you want to get even fancier, you can type out the words I AM _____________ twice across the top. Set your printer to landscape, double-sided, 13 copies and print it out before you fold them and staple. If you want to keep it simple, just write it yourself on the top of each page.

Now that you have your book made, add it to their Miracle Morning box and each day have your child a pick of a few words that correspond to the letter of the alphabet for that day. For example, on day 1, choose a few positive words that describe your child that all begin with the letter A (awesome, amazing, able, adaptable) and let them pick which one resonates with them. Next, have them draw a picture to go with that word. At 2, they will probably just scribble and may not even know what some of the words mean, but don’t worry, they will grow into the words and it can be a great way for them to learn new vocabulary. This was all we did for the first month or so. Creativity was a new drawing, Affirmations was choosing a new word, Reading was repeating the affirmations they already had created. We talked to the kids about the others- Health, Mediation, and Service, but didn’t start focusing on them until they had finished creating their affirmation books.

My last piece of advice for those starting or with little ones is to keep it short! For little ones especially, they don’t have a long attention span, so you have to keep it short. For a 2 year old I’d suggest 5 minutes or less for Creativity, 5 minutes or less for Health, less than a minute for Affirmations, 10 minutes or less for Reading, 2 minutes or less for Meditation and 2 minutes or less for Service. So in total, it should only take about 25 minutes or less for a beginner or a 2-year-old. Some kids will get lost in Creativity and want to do it for longer, which is fine, but don’t expect your 2-year-old to sit still for an hour (especially without making a huge mess).

Tips, Tricks, and Hacks- Here are some things I have learned over the years that may be helpful.

1.     Do most of your Miracle Morning still in bed- I start my day with a meditation still in bed. I also have my journal, vision board and reading next to my bed. When I've finished my meditation, I start reading then move on to journaling, visualization, and affirmations. Often I get through all of this before my daughter comes in, but if not, she joins me in my bed to snuggle during meditation. Most mornings, by the time I get out of bed all I have left to do is exercise. With my practice mostly done, I can focus on helping the kids do their C.H.A.R.M.S.  

2.     Exercise together- For little ones, you can push them in a jogging stroller to get your workout in. You can also join a mommy and me yoga class that incorporates your little ones into the poses or try the Cosmic Kids Yoga Series on YouTube with your preschooler. We bought a mini-trampoline that our kids love to use for their exercise portion. Another great resource is the 7 Minute Workout App. This one is designed just for kids. It has the same workout as the adult version (all bodyweight exercises), but the avatar is a kid.

3.     Combine C.H.A.R.M.S. or S.A.V.E.R.S.- We like to combine exercise and affirmations. Brotha James has some awesome affirmation songs that you can play while you sing and dance along or you can say some affirmations while doing jumping jacks. You can also combine Service and Creativity by making someone a card to brighten their day. You can combine Reading and Meditation by reading a guided meditation from a book like Nursery Rhyme Meditations. Reading and Health can be combined by reading a book like Good Morning, Yoga or MOVE.

4.    Audiobooks- We love audiobooks! They make getting your “reading” in so much more convenient. We almost always have an audiobook playing in the car. I have one I listen to with the kids and another just for me when I’m in the car alone. Our kids also each have an Echo Dot in their rooms to listen to an audiobook at bedtime. This way they don't need a device with a screen in their room to still get the enjoyment of an audiobook. They can get expensive, but many libraries have ways to check them out for free. OverDrive and Hoopla are two popular options or check with your local library to see what they use. Click HERE for a list of books we love.

5.     Free Play is Creativity- If your kids are being resistant, give them a box of toys and let them play on their own so you can get your practice in. Free play is becoming a lost art in our world of technology. The more simple the toy, the longer a child will play with it. Instead of a box of toys, just try giving them the box itself and see where their imagination will take them ;)

My Favorite C.H.A.R.M.S. Resources for Preschoolers- There are so many great resources out there to help you with the C.H.A.R.M.S. for your little ones. These are my favorite for the preschool set.

Creativity

Homemade Playdough: Playdough is great and it’s much cheaper if you make it yourself! This recipe requires no cooking (other than boiling water). To make it more natural you can use natural dyes like beet juice and you can even add spices or essential oils to give it different scents :) It's a sensory experience they will want to have again and again. 

Foam Stickers: I love these for little ones (as long as they are able to pull the backing off by themselves). It may take some practice, but once they get it down, they will spend quite a bit of time peeling them off to create their masterpiece. They also help with those fine motor skills- win-win!

Miracle Morning Coloring book: Did you know there is a Miracle Morning coloring book? If your little one likes to color than this book is a must! For a free sample go to CLICK HERE.

Health

7-Min Workout for Kids: As mentioned above, this is a bodyweight workout designed just for kids. There are 12 different exercises they do for 30 seconds each with a short rest in between each exercise. You can do it with them or they can just follow the avatar on the screen.

Yoga Pretzel Cards for Kids: We love these cards. The kids love to make a game of it taking turns pulling different cards. They are a great way to start kids off with a yoga practice. 

MOVE: Made by two local kids musicians, Lolly & Yoyo, I love that this book gets kids moving while interacting with a book. It’s a fun way to get kids to love books!

Affirmations

Brotha James: He is an energetic musician that sings about the power our words have. Our kids love his songs and I feel good about them being stuck in their heads all day. These songs combine the power of music with the power of affirmations- a wonderful combination. Check out his new album Abracadabra :)

Kids Affirmations Cards: These are beautifully designed cards and I love the language they use for children. They explain children’s traits as their "powers" and put affirmations it in terms even little kids can understand. They are also the same material as a board book, so really hold up for the younger set. If you’re looking for a little simpler, less expensive option, I love these DIY printable affirmation cards for kids. 

I Think, I Am: This is a wonderful introduction to help kids understand what affirmations are and how to use them in a practical sense. It’s certainly a great one to add to your home library.

Reading

 The Intentional Book Club: This website is put together by my friend and author of The Intentional Bookshelf, Sam Munoz. I love her approach to parenting and teaching your family’s values through the books you read with your kids. She put together this amazing resource for parents to help them curate their own intentional bookshelf and you can get LIFETIME access for the only $47! Note: This is an affiliate link. That means if you join this amazing club using this link, I will get a small kickback :) I do not affiliate with many companies, but this one I truly believe is awesome and want to help support Sam. 

Rolling Prairie Readers-Parent Resource Room- This is a Facebook Group run by another online friend, Melissa Droegemueller. She is a fellow homeschool mom and really loves making learning fun for kiddos. She shares so many awesome ideas of how to encourage our kids to read (and learn) through play and exploration. She is a great resource.

How to Read a Story: This is a really cute how-to book for kids. It teaches them how to read a story step-by-step. Step 1: find a story all the way to Step 10: When the book is over say, "The End." And then... if it was a really good story... go right back to the beginning and start all over again. I love the message that books should be enjoyed over and over. 

Meditation

Insight Timer App: This app is a daily staple in our home. I personally love Jason McGrice's Morning Ritual Meditation and the kids like Andrew Johnson- especially his Smiling Relaxation and Eye Relaxation. There truly is something for everyone on this app and the best part is it's free!

Mini Sphere: These little spheres are great to help teach little ones about breath work. They can follow the sphere expand and contract with their in and out breaths.

Nursery Rhyme Meditations: We love this book! It's like Mother Goose meets Gandhi. "Nursery Rhyme Meditations is a guide toward that still and quiet place where you remember, amidst the craziness of your family’s lives, how fortunate you are to be surrounded by people you love."

Service

Chore Chart with Pictures: I’m a big believer in charts to help build habits. This one has pictures so little kids can still “read” it. Laminate it and then it can be used daily to help kids build healthy habits that serve you in the long run by giving you time back in the morning and evening.

Volunteer Opportunities: This blog lists some websites that can help match you and your family to volunteer options available in your area. We have done service projects with our kids and it’s a great way to teach them about serving the larger community.

How Full is Your Bucket for Kids: I love the message of this book- when we help others (fill their bucket) we help ourselves (fill our own bucket). This is the exact message I want to teach my kids with the service element of CHARMS. They are a valuable part of the community and their help matters.

I'm grateful to be able to share my experience and resources that have worked for our family. I'd love to hear if there are other resources that have worked for your family. Join us in our Facebook Community and join the conversation. 

*note that the pictures in the middle of the post are affiliate links. If you use those links I will get a small kickback at no additional cost to you :) I'm grateful for your support.

Lindsay

On sharing the Miracle Morning with kids. Our older son is a great participant in the Miracle Morning. He has written his affirmations and is becoming proud and confident by saying them every day. If Ryan and I are reading, or meditating, he'll join in for those things, or exercise. That's one he really enjoys. It's funny, this past week he woke up, you wouldn't have known he just woke up, because he just jumped right in and started exercising in the middle of our routine. It was comical, actually!

Best Parenting Tips.

Don’t forget playfulness. I work full time so when I come home, I try to dedicate some time just for them, be it playing before bedtime or reading at night before they go to sleep. Just giving them that quality time, whatever that looks like is how we incorporate playfulness with them.

Use positive discipline. If our children have something unkind to say, or if they get in trouble, we have them do “I am” statements. We do one “I am” statement for every year of age. I think it's actually made a really positive change for them.

Spend one-on-one time with the kids. Generally, we'll dedicate date night. So I'll take one, and Ryan will stay with the other two to continue that one-on-one interaction with our kids, just so they know that they're special to us and they're getting that quality time.

Be purposeful. The Miracle Morning has made us more organized, calmer and more patient, so that helps us being purposeful with our parenting with our children. It has also helped us to always remember that they're learning and growing.

Maintain a good perspective. Kids are still learning, so being really harsh with them or giving lots of punishments is not the right way. We try and keep that in mind, that each of our children is unique and we need to treat them as such. Their learning styles are different from each other, so what works for one might not work for another.

Find good resources. One book that I read that I really enjoy and fits my oldest child to a T is, Raising Your Spirited Child by Mary Sheedy Kurcinka. My son is really energetic and he learns a little bit differently than other kids. The book will remind you that you're not the only one with a spirited child, so you're not the only one struggling. It will make you feel supported.

Create healthy partnerships. I think that's my most important partnership is with Ryan. A lot of it is impromptu. The kids will go to bed and we'll evaluate how the day went, and if there are things we could have done better, if there were opportunities for improvement during the day, and we’ll a plan going forward, which is always important. It's good to talk about it but then you need an action plan. So, we do a lot of that but we also nurture our relationship through date nights, and an occasional night away which has been great. Because without the two of us being on the same page the family unit can't function appropriately.

Talk about money. We talk about bank accounts with our 7-year-old and saving our money and being purposeful with how we're spending it, but we could be better at it, and we are seeking ways to improve that right now.

Parenting success story. When our older son learned to ride a bike that was probably one of our great accomplishments. He fell down countless times. But he was not going to give up. He persevered and he just kept trying. After 3-4 days he could finally ride that bike and he was so proud! It was amazing to watch him be resilient.

Parenting success story. Our son has a panic disorder. It was affecting his social life and his day-to-day skills of being able to go to school, so together Ryan and I put a plan in place to get him some counseling. The meditation and the affirmations have helped a lot too. It helps to ground him. He has a lot of energy, so putting the whole puzzle together with some traditional and some non-traditional care has helped settle him and he actually hasn't had a panic attack in over a year, I believe.

Final word. I just want to say to any parent out there that you're not alone. I felt alone when I started going through some of these difficulties with my son when he was having panic attacks, then he went to school and they didn't think he would be able to read, and now he's excelling in reading. You're not alone. Reach out to your school or your community. There's always someone there to help you, to re-focus you, and to support you.

I'm grateful for Ryan and Mary Lynn. For their friendship, kindness, and support. I'm grateful for Mary Lynn's reminder to reach out for support and that we're not alone. I'm grateful for the community we're building in the Miracle Morning for Parents and Families Facebook Group. If you haven't joined us yet, we'd love to have you there :)

In Gratitude, 

Lindsay

After reading the book, have your kids get into a comfortable seat and hand each of them a silverware spoon. This mindfulness exercise will serve as their Meditation. Instruct them to look at themselves using the spoon as a mirror. What do they notice? When they look into the concave side of the spoon, they will be upside down, but if they flip the spoon to the other side, they will see themselves more clearly. Now, have them close their eyes and read this guided meditation: Take a deep breath in and let it go. Have you ever felt like you were going through life upside down? Have you ever had a day when everything just wasn't going your way? Think about how that made you feel. Probably not very good. You probably felt blue like Spoon did in the story. Now imagine a bright light starting in your heart space. Feel it growing inside of you. The light is getting bigger and bigger until it's all around you. You are radiant! You have the power inside of you to flip your spoon and help others flip theirs too. When you see someone feeling blue, you can help them see all the great things you see in them, just like Spoon's mom did for him. Imagine the last time you were really happy. What were you doing? Think of the last time you were really proud of yourself. Maybe you tried something new. Maybe you stuck with something that was really hard. Never forget that you are unique and perfect just the way you are! Take one more deep breath in and when you are ready you can open your eyes to a beautiful new day. 

This exercise can create a wonderful conversation about our perception of ourselves and how we can help "flip the spoon" for others. This is a great time to have your kids create some Affirmations to say to themselves in the spoon. Some examples from the book are:

1. I am unique.
2. I am perfect just the way I am.
3. I am a good friend.
4. I have many strengths.
5. I am lucky.
6. I feel so alive. 

For Creativity, print out the image below and have your kids fill each spoon with something great about themselves. These could be things they are proud they are learning, skills they have, positive character traits or affirmations. You may need to help your child as Spoon's mother did in the story. If they can't come up with strengths they see in themselves, I'm sure you know many. If they are too young to write independently, you can write it for them and have them decorate the spoons any way they would like. This activity was adapted from a post on the Coffee Cups and Crayons Blog. If you'd like some other creative ideas of how to reuse plastic spoons, check out this Delicate Construction Blog Post. I especially like the spoon prints and the candle holder.  

Now it's time for Health! There are so many healthy snacks that can be enjoyed or made with a spoon, but today let's have a little fun and actually create a spoon from the lid of either applesauce or yogurt! Most single-serve applesauce or yogurts come with a removable aluminum foil lid that can be folded into a spoon. Check out this YouTube video for a quick tutorial or just give your kids the idea and see if they can come up with their own design. For the exercise portion of health, let's play the card game "spoons," but with a twist! Instead of having the spoons in the center of the playing area, place them some distance away so there will be a mad rush to get them when someone gets the four of a kind. We put the spoons on another floor of the house, so we got some cardio from running up the stairs ;) A word of caution: this game can quickly get out of hand, so make sure you have a quick talk about safety. Also make sure you take your socks off, especially if you have hardwood floors. All you need to play the game is a deck of cards, 3-13 people and 2-12 spoons (one less than the number of players). For full playing instructions, click here. If you'd like to make the game of spoons more educational, check out this mathematical twist on the game. 

An easy Service for this story is to have your kids help load or unload the dishwasher, wash the dishes or set the table for breakfast. If you have some actual silver spoons you could also break out the polish and let the kids make them shine ;) Another thing they could do for service is to help "flip the spoon" for someone during their day. I love this article from Hands-Free Mama talking about how important it is to include others. Having recently relocated, this article really resonated with me.

I'm grateful for this story and the lesson it holds about not comparing ourselves to others and being confident in our skin. I'm grateful for the fun I had compiling these ideas and doing them with my kids. I'm grateful for Brianna and Matt and their help running a live C.H.A.R.M.S. session at our FamBundance retreat last week. I love to hear from you! Please join the conversation over in our Facebook Community. 

In Gratitude, 

Lindsay

Use the following questions to go deeper with your kids on the concepts in the book:

1.     In the book, when Santa was ill, he called Pete the Cat to help him. Who could you count on if you needed a helping hand?

2.     In the book, Pete the Cat says, “I can do it! And although I am small at Christmas we give, so I’ll give it my all.” Can you think of a time when you felt small, but by working hard you still reached your goal?

3.     At the end of the story, there was a celebration for Pete the Cat’s success. What was your last success and how did you celebrate it? Or what is your favorite way to celebrate your accomplishments?

4.     Let’s “rewrite” the story. If you were the author how would you have Pete the Cat save Christmas?

5.     Pete the Cat gave his all in the story, what are some ways we can give our all this Christmas?

Possible affirmations for this story include: I am a Giver. I give my all. I am committed to taking small, consistent actions to reach my goals. I am a good friend. I am kind. What other affirmations can you think of? Have your kids say these statements out loud. 

For Creativity, print out this maze and help Pete get to the North Pole. For additional activities including a dot-to-dot, a word scramble and a drawing exercise click here.

Now that Pete the Cat has made it to the North Pole, he needs some reindeer to help pull his minibus. These will be healthy, edible reindeer to cover Health! You probably already have everything you need to make them in the pantry. Start with a rice cake, apple or any other circular base (cookies work, but are obviously not as healthy). Next, spread your favorite nut spread- my personal favorite is Justin’s Vanilla Almond Butter. If your family has allergies (or your making these for a nut-free classroom) Sunflower seed butter is a great alternative. Now add raisins for eyes and the nose (or a cherry or dried cranberry nose if you’re making Rudolph ;). Lastly, add some pretzel antlers and enjoy!

If you’re doing this activity with many children, here is a Reindeer tag game to get their heart rates up (think- Red Rover). Create a line called the North Pole and have all the children up there. Allow the kids to pick one of the Reindeer names: Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donner, Blitzen or Rudolph. One child is “Santa” and stands in the middle. “Santa” calls out the reindeer names one at a time and anyone who picked that name will run or gallop across while Santa tries to tag them. If a reindeer gets tagged, then they help “Santa” tag more reindeer until only one remains. That person then becomes the next “Santa” and the game starts over. To modify for fewer children, try it as red-light, green-light instead. The person at the end is Santa and the reindeer need to get to him as fast as they can. 

Now that they got all their wiggles out, it’s time to slow things down with a Meditation. On the last page of the book, there is a Christmas tree decorated with red balls and a star on top. Show this picture to your child before the meditation to help them visualize themselves as that tree. Encourage your child to sit up tall in a chair with their feet on the ground and read this Guided Christmas Tree Meditation them: Sit up tall and take a deep breath in. As you close your eyes and breathe out, picture yourself as a Christmas tree. Feel your trunk going down into the ground and your roots reaching deep down into the Earth. Imagine you are decorated for Christmas with colorful, red balls. Each ball holds Christmas magic. Imagine the balls filling up with any thoughts or feelings that don’t bring you joy. Maybe you’re worried about a test you have coming up or you had a fight with a friend. Whatever thoughts or feelings you don’t want to hold onto, place them inside a red ball and imagine it drifting high up into the sky until it’s out of your sight. Continue filling up the balls until all you have left in your heart is pure joy. Let me know when that is (pause here until your child is ready). Now, bring your hands to the top of your head and imagine bright starlight shining out from the top of your head and radiating your joy to all you come into contact with today. As you gently open your eyes, let a big smile come across your face, knowing today will be a wonderful day!

The last of the C.H.A.R.M.S. is Service. The holidays are a wonderful time to help those who are less fortunate than you. Perhaps you can have your child “adopt” another child to buy gifts for. Have them make handmade cards for soldiers or other kids who are hospitalized over the holidays. They could give their time to go sing carols at a local nursing home or be a helper in the kitchen making cookies for the neighbors. Use question 5 above to help brainstorm with your child how they can give this Christmas. I’d love to hear your ideas!

I'm grateful for Pete the Cat and the many lessons he has taught my kids through his stories. I"m grateful for this joyous time of year where faith, giving, receiving, family and light are all celebrated. I'm grateful for all the blessings I've had this year and wish you a safe and warm holiday season. I'd love to connect with you. Please join the conversation in our Facebook Community. 

In Gratitude,

Lindsay

If you’re anything like me, the holidays come with a lot of joy but also some unwanted stress. I love giving gifts, but I want my gifts to be meaningful and not just clutter up the recipient's home or life. That’s why I created this list of gifts that follow our family’s values- Creativity, Health, Affirmations, Reading, Meditation, and Service. If you’d like to create a holiday season with more fun and less stuff check out the Holiday Wish List Registry at SoKind.Org.

Give the Gift of Creativity- I love getting creative for the holidays. Personalized gifts require thought and often time to put them together and are generally more meaningful than something you pulled off a shelf at the mall. I love to make Christmas photo books for my family members using Shutterfly. Another fun idea is to make your family members customized coupon books.  They make great stocking stuffers ;) To make these gifts truly customized, make them with the recipient’s love language in mind. To find out your child's love language take this quiz, this one for a teen or this one for you or your spouse.

Give the Gift of Health- Health is so important! Are your kids are involved in many activities throughout the year? Why not hit up the grandparents or other family members to help chip in! Tyler recently started baseball lessons, so I put it on his Christmas list. Now Grandpa can help pay for them (especially since it was his influence that got him into baseball in the first place ;). Does your child take dance lessons or practice Tae Kwon Do, do they play soccer or another sport? For the holidays, ask for a gift card to help offset the cost of these activities. Sports equipment is another great gift for the athletes in the family. Do you have any busy moms on your list or need an idea for yourself? Give them the gift of knowing “what’s for dinner?” with a gift box from Hello Fresh.

Give the Gift of Affirmations- Affirmations were the hardest habit for me to start when I was new to The Miracle Morning. Luckily, we can borrow others affirmations until we are ready to create our own. I personally love these affirmation cards from Fringe & Fitness. They are simple and beautiful and you can leave them right by the bathroom mirror to remind yourself of how truly amazing you are! If you have a kid that loves to color on your list, check out The Miracle Morning Art of Affirmation Coloring book. It’s the perfect gift! They get to color while they fill their heads with positivity. Add in some awesome markers and you're sure to have one happy kid on your hands. Don't forget about musical affirmations! My good friend, Jeremy A.K.A Brotha James, sings uplifting songs with affirmations built right in. Check out his first CD called Animal and in early 2018 keep an eye out for his new album! 

Give the Gift of Reading- I love to teach my kids through reading together! Did you ever wish there was a service where you could input the values you want to teach your children and it would give you a list based on other like-hearted parents experiences with those books? Well, now there is! It’s called The Intentional Book Club. Check out this blog post about all the wonderful benefits you will get for under $10 a month! Don’t have time to read? Ask for a subscription to Audible and listen to your books, like I do.

Give the Gift of Meditation- Kids do not have the same attention span as adults (typically). They do, however, have the ability to focus and with practice, that muscle can get stronger. I like to use props with my kids to give their brains something to focus on. One of my favorite props is a Hoberman Sphere to help them focus on breathing. As they breathe in, have them expand the sphere and when they breathe out collapse the sphere (or you can do it for them and the follow along). Another great tool I’ve found is the book, Nursery Rhyme Meditations by Dr. Taylor Moore O’Shea. This wonderful book has several meditations you can read to your child to guide them. I love the rhyming flow of the meditations and all I have to do to guide my kids is read! No previous knowledge of meditation necessary.

Give the Gift of Service- Do your kids already have enough stuff? Give them the gift of giving this season.  There are plenty of families that do not have enough this holiday season. Work together to make desserts for a local homeless shelter, adopt a child or family from a church or other charity organization. Give money in honor of the people on your list. Two of our favorite organizations to support are The Front Row Foundation and 1Life Fully Lived. This year instead of asking for birthday presents, the kids and I are asking for donations to The Front Row Foundation. Facebook now makes it really easy to set up a fundraiser of your own.

Watch this video to see just one of the reasons we love The Front Row Foundation!

I’m grateful that the holiday season is upon us and that this is a time of traditions and family togetherness. I’m grateful for the ability to give generously throughout the year and I’m able to help those in more difficult circumstances than my own. I’m grateful to you and wish you all the blessings this season has to offer. I love to connect with my readers. Please join the conversation with other like-hearted parents in our Facebook Community.

In Gratitude,

Lindsay

I've had the privilege of being a contributing author for The Mom Conference Blog since May. Here are links to the posts I've written so far:

• The 5 Best Lessons From My Mother
• Five Tips for Improved Family Connection
• Air Travel Hacks with Kids in Tow
• How the Miracle Morning Makes our Mornings Run More Smoothly

I love what Desi has put together and the opportunity to add value to her community. She's created an amazing online conference For Moms by Moms. We all struggle to figure out how to be the best moms we can and that is where The Mom Conference comes in.

 WHAT IS THE MOM CONFERENCE?

The Mom Conference is a totally FREE three-day online event.  It runs October 17, 18 & 19th. Best of all, you can listen while you fold laundry, do the dishes, or during nap time.

Attend the conference with over 75,000 moms around the world and come away armed with powerful new strategies on everything from sibling rivalry to meal planning to finding more joy in motherhood.

To Register for FREE click here

WHY ATTEND? 

There are so many hard situations as a mom that you wonder if you are handling things the right way.  Sometimes all we need is a paradigm shift or better tools.

During the conference, you will have the opportunity to learn practical solutions to the hard stuff that motherhood throws at you. Things like:

• Getting out of the cycle of yelling, nagging, and reminding to get your kids to listen.
• Managing sibling rivalry, when to step in or when to let your kids work it out.
• Setting up routines so you can have time for what’s most important to you.
• Keeping your kids safe online.
• Effectively managing depression and anxiety.
• Keeping up with a busy household; you’ll learn the best of the best mom hacks.
• Living a more intentional and joyful life and teach your children to do the same.

And much more!

WHO IS SPEAKING?

• Dr. Laura Markham, Clinical Psychologist, bestselling author and discipline expert at Aha Parenting
• Ruth Soukup, NYT Best-Selling Author and Founder of Living Well, Spending Less
• Amy McCready, parenting expert, TODAY Show Contributor, author and creator of Positive Parenting Solutions
• The Bucket List Family, Full Time Traveling Family, @bucketlistfamily with a community of over 600,000 followers
• David Burns, expert on anxiety and depression, NYT Best Selling Author of Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy

CLICK HERE TO SEE A LIST OF ALL THE SPEAKERS

To help you avoid procrastination (one of my biggest struggles), if you register RIGHT NOW, you’ll have access to the following FREE GIFT as soon as your registration has been completed!

~ A FREE Listening Guide for Dr. Laura Markham’s interview on sibling rivalry. Get a sneak peak on the key takeaways from her interview. 

I'm grateful to be able to help promote this amazing event and to be a part of The Mom Conference blog. I'm grateful for all the new tools and inspiration I will gain from joining in and listening to the amazing speakers October 17, 18 & 19. And I'm grateful it's all online so I can watch it from the comfort of Starbucks while my kids are at Open Connections :) I'd love to hear which speaker you're most looking forward to learning from? Please join the conversation in our Facebook Community. 

In Gratitude, 

Lindsay 

P.S. If you read all the way to the end and still haven't registered, do it HERE!

So many love the idea of the C.H.A.R.M.S. but have trouble knowing exactly what to do at home. I thought it may be helpful to create some themed Miracle Mornings for kids that parents can use at home or teachers can use in the classroom. I want to make it easy for you to pass on the principles of personal development to your kids by sharing arts & crafts, fun ways to move their bodies, powerful affirmations, book recommendations that share a lesson, mindfulness principles, and service projects around the house and in their community. I'd love to have others contribute their own themed Miracle Mornings too, so if you have a great routine we would love to hear about it! Please contact me at lindsay@gratefulparent.com if you'd like to be a contributor. 

The first one will feature the book, A Golden Adventure The Hunt for the Missing Rainbow written by a new friend of mine, Sarah Beebe. Sarah and I met in Cleveland, OH this summer at the Front Row Foundation Summit and I love this book. In this story, two Golden Retrievers see a rainbow but it quickly disappears. They go on an adventure to find it again and along the way find something in nature for each color of the rainbow. This book is great for kids learning to read on their own. All the color words are printed in that color so even non-readers can "read" those words. Once you're done reading the story, you are invited to go on your own rainbow walk, which is a great way to combine the Health and Meditation C.H.A.R.M.S.

Creativity: Visit Sarah's website for several creativity activities that go with the book. Depending on your child's age they range from coloring pages for the younger set up to a double puzzle for the elementary aged kids. She also has a page where your child can set some reading goals!

Health: Go on your own Rainbow Walk. As you walk look for all the colors of the rainbow- red, orange, yellow, green, blue and violet. 

Affirmation: I am aware of my surroundings.                                                  As parents, we want our kids to be aware of what's happening around them and pay attention to their surroundings and the choices they are making. My friend Traci Osborn (who is one of the parenting profiles in The Miracle Morning for Parents and Families) told me she learned at a parenting workshop to say, "be aware" instead of saying, "be careful" to children. Here's a brilliant article that explains exactly why. 

Reading: A Golden Adventure The Hunt for the Missing Rainbow by Sarah Beebe

Meditation: Use the Rainbow Walk as a walking meditation. You can explain to your kids that during the walk, "we're going to walk slowly and be extra aware of the colors we see to find all the colors of the rainbow." They will be focusing on the sense of sight which is a mindfulness practice. Here's an article with some other ideas for using a walking meditation with kids. 

Service: In a previous blog post I talked about Jay Papasan's framework for giving. If you have nothing else, give gratitude. The next step is to give time and then money. This is probably the highest level our kids will be contributing. The next two levels are leadership (by serving on a board of directors) and then wealth (by setting up a foundation). So I will give 3 service examples based on this framework. Since the story is about dogs the ideas will stick to that theme. To give gratitude ask your kids why they are grateful for your family pet. If you don't have a family pet, maybe ask about animals in general. To give time your child could spend some time either feeding or walking the family pet. If you don't have a family pet, maybe have them offer to walk or feed a neighbor's dog- without accepting payment. Another idea is to spend some time making homemade dog biscuits to gift to neighbors or a local pet shelter. If you want to give money or goods, contact your local animal shelter to find out their needs. Most post a wishlist of needs right on their websites. Have your child help pick out the goods to donate and come with you when you drop them off. 

I hope this was helpful to you and I plan to do more of these. Please offer me some feedback if you like this format or if you'd like me to tweak things. I'm grateful for Sarah Beebe and her passion for helping kids learn to read in a fun way. I'm grateful we connected at the Front Row Summit and look forward to seeing what she will create next! I'm sending Goldie healing energy for a quick recovery from her recent knee surgery. Poor girl! I love to hear from you. Please comment below or better yet, join the conversation over in The Miracle Morning for Parents and Families Facebook Community. 

          On May 20, 2017, we were kindly welcomed and received a folder for the day as well as a glass water container to keep us hydrated. Lizzy is a master of hand lettering, so she personally handwrote all our name tags so beautifully. The food was also impeccable. Everything was locally sourced, organic and vegan! The chef clearly put a lot of time and love into the food. We were encouraged to set an intention for the day and write it on a rock. Mine was clarity.

            We began the day in a circle and everyone introduced herself and shared what they wanted to get out of the day. We then moved into our first exercise of the day. Lizzy and Sheila had us think about what was holding us back from truly living the life of our dreams. They asked us to journal about it and then synthesize it into one word or phrase. We wrote those words in big letters on a piece of paper then headed outside. Again we formed a circle, this time around a fire pit. One by one, as we felt led, we went to the center of the circle to burn our paper, energetically releasing our old stories. My word was fear.

            Now that we had released what was holding us back, it was time to set an intention for what we did want. For me that intention was wholeness. We were guided in a exercise where we wrote down, “what do you want to say YES to? NO? and Maybe So?” I drew 3 columns on my paper and wrote out my lists. This led into another journal session to answer the question, “How does your intention feel sacred to you?”

             I wrote: “We are made whole. In the beginning, we had everything we need to survive and thrive. As I grew and learned and connected with others, I lost sight of my wholeness. I allowed the stories I was telling myself to rob me of those feelings. I began to feel broken, used and unworthy. I’ve been on a journey back to wholeness and I’m not quite there. I still have more work to do and I’m on my way. Each time I sit down to journal, reflect on my life and plan for the future, I get closer to wholeness. I don’t need to compare myself to others. For me to be whole, it will come from within. No one else can make me feel that way. I need to accept my own wholeness with a full heart.”

            We then used these intentions to create our very own 2 X 2 canvases. Lizzy shared with us some techniques she uses in her hand lettering and then we got creative turning our word into a symbol. We each made two mostly identical prints of our symbol before we played a bingo game in order to get to know each other a little better. The goal was to fill in your entire paper. The squares had phrases like “doesn’t like chocolate,” “likes to garden” and “knows how to change a tire.” We then took a break for amazing vegan tacos for lunch.

            After filling up with nourishment, Sheila lead us through an exercise about bold boundaries and we discussed the difference between a boundary and a block. To me, boundaries are about caring for yourself and come from a place of love while a block is fear based and does not contribute to your overall well-being. Consider these questions for yourself:

·      Where can you start saying YES to you and all that matters most to you?

·      How can you create sacred space for all you want to thrive?

·      What might be possible as a result of your thriving life?

·      How might you shift your beliefs around boundaries?

          After understanding that setting boundaries is all about well-being, it was our turn to create a personalized self-care plan. Part 1 was to explore what makes us come alive and what we truly value deep down. Part 2 was to Find the Feelings. From the first list, we were to circle words that create emotion for us then narrow it down to 3-5 feelings. Part 3 was to Cultivate Self-Care. “Consider your guiding feelings and what feels like release, rejuvenation, healing, restoration, care. Consider things you already do that you’re willing to do more mindfully. Open to curiosity about new things or trying things again. Play with daily, weekly, monthly and yearly ideas.” This was my self-care plan as an example:

·      Daily: Miracle Morning myself and with kids

·      Weekly: Date night with Mike and attend one yoga class

·      Bi-weekly: massage and write a blog post

·      Monthly: record one podcast interview, one girls night, self-care appointment (mani/pedi, haircut, dentist, dr, chiropractor, etc.)

·      Quarterly: Family Board Meeting with both Tyler and Ember and weekend away with Mike

·      Yearly: Create a Vision Board, Set Intentions and Year End Review

          At the last circle of the day, we were asked to put one copy of our intention print in the center. We took turns sharing what we learned that day and then chose a print to take with us as well. We were also given wonderful gift bags to take home with us that included some affirmations cards and some wonderful lotion along with other gifts. Lizzy also allowed each of us to choose a hand-lettered print of hers to take home. Lastly, throughout the day, we were given small gemstones that we placed in a cute little bottle. We were given a chain to put the bottle on as a reminder of the work we had done that day and the connection that we all share. As my gift to the group, I gave everyone a copy of The Miracle Morning for Parents and Families. It was such a wonderful time to connect with local, like-hearted women.

          I’m grateful for Lizzy and Sheila for facilitating such a beautiful retreat and all the amazing touches they put in throughout the day. I’m grateful I got to walk away with a plan for my self-care and a greater understanding of what makes me tick. I’m grateful for all the wonderful women I met at the retreat and for Open Connections for hosting the day. I’m also grateful for the yummy food that was served all day.

          If you would like to plan a similar one-day retreat, please talk to Lizzy! Here is a podcast where she and my friend Tonya Rineer talk all things retreat planning. If you'd like to sign up for Sheila's next retreat for couples on October 7 in Newtown Square, PA, I'd love to see you there! I’d love to hear from you. You can leave a comment here or better yet, join the conversation in our Facebook Community.

In Gratitude,

Lindsay

          The day after the retreat our family flew to CO to close on my husband’s dream property up in the CO Rocky Mountains. We spent a week there shopping, organizing and figuring out how to work all the crazy electronics. We flew back to PA just in time to facilitate a 3-day family mastermind at our home with 13 amazing families before we relocated to Philadelphia for the weekend to attend the East Coast 1 Life Fully Lived Conference. There we again got to hear the brilliance of Jeff Hoffman, along with Jeff Kaylor, Jennifer Groover, Neale Godfrey and many others. I also had the opportunity to teach a live CHARMS session for kids and help both kids and adults create a vision board.

          Then next weekend, Tyler and I flew to Utah to attend the Board Meeting International Elevation Summit where we spent time bonding with each other and 25 other entrepreneur parent-child pairs. Dr. Shefali led us in some fun and powerful exercises. We got to play together and have some new experiences. Mike stayed at home with Ember and they had their own amazing weekend complete with a limo ride to a Jack Johnson concert and a turtle race at a local beer garden. When we got back from Utah, I had a few days to get ready for Tyler’s homeschool evaluation and I also helped host a screening of the documentary “Most Likely to Succeed” at Open Connections.

          We decided to spend the summer in our new CO home, so I had a lot of packing and organizing to do before we left on June 23. We’ve had a great first weekend in CO and are excited to see what the summer holds for us here. I’m working on getting some help set up here so I can continue to write throughout the summer. I want to go deeper and start implementing all I learned at the amazing events I’ve experienced recently and pass those lessons on to you.

            I’m grateful for a flexible “job” so we can spend our summer in CO. I’m grateful for the beautiful views I wake up to every morning and the many activities we can experience so close by. I’m grateful for all the learning I’ve done over the past month or so and excited to dive deeper by sharing my takeaways with you. I’m grateful I’m able to co-create my life with Mike and the kids so we all get what we want. I'd love to hear from you! Please join our Facebook Community to join the conversation. Tell us about your summer plans.