gravy machine

Two Holidays

noreply@blogger.com (Donnie) — Fri, 30 Nov 2012 03:35:00 +0000

It seems that every passing year brings with it a little more irony to the Holiday Season. Our level of thanksgiving is determined by how much we are able to consume at 1 AM on Black Friday and the “Spirit of Giving” is eclipsed by the spirit of competition.

I mean, how many kids will get “exactly what they wanted” this Christmas, only to continue experience the pain of loneliness as the excitement wears off and they find themselves in a house full of toys but no parents? How many parents will end up in court this January for either assault and battery or bankruptcy because they mistakenly thought happiness could be bought, and half price must translate to twice the merchandise.

I’m sure I’m not the first person to have a story of grown adults physically fighting over the last item in the sale bin while melodies of “peace on earth and goodwill towards men” waft down from the speakers above and I certainly won’t be the last.

But what is it about celebrating the birth of Jesus that makes so many people act like the Devil?

In truth, there are two holiday seasons happening right now. One celebrates the birth of the Savior; the other celebrates all the things He came to save us from. In Matthew chapter 6, Jesus teaches “No one can serve two masters. For you will hate one and love the other, or be devoted to one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and money.” A few minutes later he tells his listeners to reject the frenzy and exhaustion that comes along with trying to provide for oneself and instead “make the Kingdom of God your primary concern.”

So which Holiday Season are you celebrating this year? A Thanksgiving dedicated to gluttony, a Christmas dedicated to greed, and a New Year’s dedicated to working off the consequences of the first two? Or will you show thankfulness through giving back, will you celebrate the birth of Salvation by giving others grace, and rejoice over the realization that heaven is one year closer on January 1?

Worrying about stuff this Holiday Season won’t add a single moment to your life. Worrying about the Kingdom of Heaven could add an eternity.

Jesus, help me never to confuse what I see around me right now with the sacrifice you made to open heaven's doors to me. Guide my eyes beyond a hollowness of possessions and fix them on the grandeur of Heaven. Amen.

Party Like an Astronaut

noreply@blogger.com (Donnie) — Tue, 02 Oct 2012 05:24:00 +0000

I took some time over the weekend to get in the lab and make some magic...here's what happened...

"Show Me a Sign" (John 6:22-40 DKV)

noreply@blogger.com (Donnie) — Sat, 07 Apr 2012 20:43:00 +0000

²²Donnie had seen that the disciples had taken the only car, and realized Jesus had not gone with them. ²³Several cars from Berrien Springs began to arrive near the place where the Lord had blessed the bread and the people had eaten. ²⁴So when Donnie saw that neither Jesus nor his disciples were there, he got into his car and drove to Chicago to look for him. ²⁵Donnie found him on the other side of Lake Michigan and asked, “Rabbi, when did you get here?”

²⁶Jesus replied, “I tell you the truth, you want to be with me because I fed you, not because you understood the miraculous signs. ²⁷But don’t be so concerned about perishable things like food. Spend your energy seeking the eternal life that the Son of Man can give you. For God the Father has given me the seal of his approval.”

²⁸Donnie replied, “I want to perform God’s works, too. What should I do?”

²⁹Jesus told him, “This is the only work God wants from you: Believe in the one he has sent.”

³⁰Donnie answered, “Show me a miraculous sign if you want me to believe in you. What can you do?
³¹After all, my ancestors ate manna while they journeyed through the wilderness! The Scriptures say, ‘Moses gave them bread from heaven to eat.’”

³²Jesus said, “I tell you the truth, Moses didn’t give you bread from heaven. My Father did. And now he offers you the true bread from heaven. ³³The true bread of God is the one who comes down from heaven and gives life to the world.”

³⁴“Sir,” Donnie said, “give me that bread every day.”

³⁵Jesus replied, “I am the bread of life. Whoever comes to me will never be hungry again. Whoever believes in me will never be thirsty. ³⁶But you haven’t believed in me even though you have seen me.

³⁷However, those the Father has given me will come to me, and I will never reject them. ³⁸For I have come down from heaven to do the will of God who sent me, not to do my own will. ³⁹And this is the will of God, that I should not lose even one of all those he has given me, but that I should raise them up at the last day. ⁴⁰For it is my Father’s will that all who see his Son and believe in him should have eternal life. I will raise them up at the last day.”

Jesus, it must be so disappointing to see how your children never change. Forgive me for seeking you out only when I need a miracle. Give me the eyes to see through the temporal and into the eternal. Strengthen my faith, it is so weak. Sustain me, Jesus, however you see as best. Amen.

Death & Taxes

noreply@blogger.com (Donnie) — Sat, 24 Mar 2012 06:34:00 +0000

If death & taxes are certain, than taxes will most likely cause my death. Rachel and I made our yearly pilgrimage to H&R Block this afternoon not quite sure what to expect. Two years ago we got a large refund from the federal government. Last year we broke even...except for CA State taxes...of course we've been paying those every year.

After pulling up to the front of the building we bowed our heads for a quick prayer...it seemed like the right thing to do.

"God please help this to go ok."

The lady seemed nice enough. She chattered with us about the rain outside as she pecked our W2's into the system. We told her about how we ended up in MI from CA...man I'm tired of people flipping out about us living in Yosemite.

She finishes entering the paperwork we've brought and waits for the computer to crunch the numbers. Rachel and I glance at each other...like people do in the movies...right before they die.

"It looks like you'll have a balance due..." I tune out her voice because I am reading the numbers on her computer screen.

MI State = We owe $48...meh
CA State = We owe $222...danget...every time
Federal = We owe...$1338?!?! What the crap?!

Rachel looks like she might throw up. Suddenly we don't feel so chatty. The lady can tell we didn't see it coming. Now is as good of time as any.

"Aaannnnndddddd your H&R Block fees come to...$298"

Oh wow...we walked in hoping to get something back...we leave trying to figure out where the nearly $2000 will come from before April 17. We spend the rest of the afternoon trying to distract ourselves from the sick feeling in our stomachs. Ever wonder what music inspired by debt depression sounds like?

"Faith is the confidence that what we hope for will actually happen; it gives us assurance about things we cannot see. ²Through their faith, the people in days of old earned a good reputation." (Hebrews 11:1,2 NLT)

Well, hooray for them.

But I suck at faith...it doesn't mix well with pessimism. More often than not I find myself more confident that God won't come through for me than I am that He will. I mean, why should He? He doesn't owe me anything...and suffering is supposed to be good for me, right? I'm a spoiled American anyhow...God already has helped me. He let me be born here.

A few weeks ago found me joking with friends about "Name It and Claim It" theology. Now I wish it were that simple. Sadly, even if it were I still wouldn't have enough faith for it.

It's one thing to sit in our Honda and bow our heads like good Christians to thank God in advance for providing a way when there seems to be none...it's quite another to get out of our Honda confident that He actually will. And so I set to work looking at our bank accounts and reading 2012 tax law to discern our payment options. It's an answer to prayer if it gets paid at all right? It's not like a check for the exact amount is just going to magically show up in our mailbox. That kind of thing only happens to other people.

Faith. It means intentionally leaving room for God to show Himself mighty. It means not having a 'Plan B' in case He doesn't show up because I'm so confident that He will. It means being vulnerable to forces outside of my control. It means trust.

I suck at all those things...and as with most of my life's discrepancies I find the distance between articulating the problem and having the courage to live the solution is greater than personal safety recommends. I'd like to confidently type, "Update on God's provision coming soon! Stay tuned!" But in the back of my mind I'm already writing up Craigslist ads to raise the money myself.

Death & taxes...I'm told faith can conquer both. Now all I need to do is believe it...

Oh God, how desperately I need faith. No matter how hard I try I cannot generate it on my own. Please give me the courage to step aside and watch you calm this storm. Show Yourself mighty in this crisis and do not let me forget it when You do. Complete this work you began in me. You are faithful, Father...please make me faithful. Amen.

I Will...

noreply@blogger.com (Donnie) — Thu, 01 Mar 2012 17:30:00 +0000

I do not know how it began, but I know it did.

I do not know how it will end, but I know it will.

I don't know where I am going, but I'm on my way.

I don't know who I will be, but I will not be that guy.

I will fall, and I will rise.

But no matter what...I will. Yes. I will.

- Andrea Keele
(Gravy Machine Ghost Writer)

Theology of Justin Beiber

noreply@blogger.com (Donnie) — Mon, 27 Feb 2012 07:14:00 +0000

I hate doing homework...especially when there isn't immediate pressure to finish it. This semester I've found myself doing almost anything to avoid doing assignments but last week I hit a new low.

Rachel signed us up for a Netflix trial...something I'm not too excited about since we dropped them last summer out of principle. Still, I thought I'd hop on to see if their streaming options had gotten any better. They haven't. Truth told I was wanting to watch one of the Star Wars episodes or Avatard to escape the reality that Michigan is overwhelmingly dull this time of year. I've found that there's nothing quite like a good old-fashioned Drone Army battle or Mountain Banshee taming to get your mind off anything you are dissatisfied with in real life. I digress.

Since Netflix won't stream those movies until 2050, I began diving though Netflix's rather large digital dumpster until I landed on "Justin Bieber: Never Say Never", a documentary of a young Canadian's fast track to puberty...er...stardom, with the finale being a sold out show of New York City's Madison Square Garden, the unarguable sign that an artist has indeed "arrived".

I feel like most people who hate Justin Bieber do so only because they can't be him...it certainly can't be because he isn't talented. He had better rhythm as a 3 year old than most people do as adults, he proficiently plays several instruments, and how could one forget that breathtaking voice that liquifies any 9 - 15 year old female heart within earshot? I'm no different from the rest of the naysayers who go out of their way to dislike his videos on youtube. I'm jealous. Heck, I'd settle just to get my hair to do that immaculate swoop thing. No? Could I at least get a jacket with a diagonal zipper? Some people have all the luck...

As far as documentaries go, it wasn't half bad...at least the 30 minutes that I saw. Aside from Americans being total idiots, I can see why he has such a massive fan base. Who knew that a few videos posted on YouTube could lead to being an international sensation? It didn't come without effort, to be sure (I was actually pretty surprised at how hard he worked to promote himself across the country), but isn't the hardest part just getting noticed?

The alarm on my phone telling me I have 15 minutes to get to a Greek study session pulls me out of my stadium seat and plops me firmly back on the futon in our living room. Too bad...he was just getting ready to give some city the privilege of having "One Less Lonely Girl."

A few minutes later finds me putting along to Andrews rather unenthusiastically. I hadn't been taken to a distant, action-packed planet, but the documentary did succeed in pulling me out of my reality and coming back was finding me very dissatisfied. I mean, who doesn't want to be the person to sell out Madison Square Garden in 22 minutes? I had only seen a half hour of Justin Bieber's life but apparently it doesn't take very long to wish I could trade grad school for millions of fans...and dollars.

"There's a lot of people that are discouraging in life and that will tell you you can't do something, but you just got to remember that the sky's the limit..." Thanks J-dawgs. In fact, I'd love to "follow my dreams"...it's just that I'm too busy following this pesky calling.

And herein lies the two conflicting theologies of my life. One tells me to follow my dreams because it will make me happy. Because if I work hard at it I can see the fruits of my labor. I can become successful. I can become secure in my finances. I might even pick up a few admirers along the way.

The other tells me to follow my calling, not because it will always make me happy, but because it will leave me satisfied. Chances are good I will work hard and never see any results. Success is defined rather differently, I will probably lose some sleep over where needed money will come from, and admirers will probably be replaced with lumberjacks trying to chop me down at the knee.

It seems that there is a reason that dreams and callings rarely align. Dreams are chosen, callings are issued. And while it seems obvious which I should choose, my preconceived human notion that happiness is a tangible that can be bought and sold is a hard habit to break. My Bible says be content, my heart says be rich. My bible says be at peace, my heart says pay the bills. My Bible says to let my paths be directed, my heart says to choose my path. And no matter how many times I commit myself to my calling, if indeed this is my calling, I always end up catching myself day-dreaming of a Justin Bieber-style life. No more homework. No more car payment. No more small apartment. No more Michigan...all the things that make life hard would be gone and nothing would stand between me and happiness...except for myself. I'm so temporal.

So who's theology to study? Justin Bieber, overnight sensation and pop-star extraordinaire, who bids me to follow my dreams? Or God, supreme ruler of the universe and loving friend, who bids me to follow His call? The spirit is willing...but the flesh is so frustratingly weak.

Father, help me to recognize my human nature for what it is and give me the strength to follow your voice, even when it feels like I'm being led into the desert. Help me to trust you to provide for my needs. Change my mentality.

And send Jesus soon...I can't stand it here much longer...

You Know What It Is...

noreply@blogger.com (Donnie) — Tue, 14 Feb 2012 17:12:00 +0000

So a few weeks ago I dipped in to my slush fund...well...drained my slush fund...to purchase my very own MIDI control unit by Arturia. It came with some cool production software and a host of synths but also with a decently steep learning curve.

Ableton Live is probably a pretty sweet program...but after several hours of watching youtube tutorials and clicking around...it just didn't seem to be coming together. I'm sure the problem is me...but I don't have time to fix it.

So short story long...hooray for Logic Pro! I finally figured out how to integrate the synth software with Logic with some pretty sweet results. I'm no Dr. Dre but I felt pretty good with the results after a couple of hours. Check it out.

I'm thinking about dropping some rhymes about Andrews...akin to the famous "423 Fa Life" that featured all the best aspects of Southern. However, I'm finding it a bit difficult to brag on a place I'm not super excited about...meh...we'll see.

"Touchscreen"

noreply@blogger.com (Donnie) — Sat, 21 Jan 2012 04:38:00 +0000

A third installment concerning true connectedness...

Disconnect to Connect

noreply@blogger.com (Donnie) — Mon, 26 Dec 2011 04:55:00 +0000

A continuation of my conversation with myself...in Thai...

Distracted

noreply@blogger.com (Donnie) — Fri, 23 Dec 2011 21:19:00 +0000

Some people run to chocolate or ice cream, others turn to movies, a lot of people use sleep. But when I'm stressed I reach for my laptop. I can waste so much time doing absolutely nothing on it. It seems every now and again I lay in bed and wonder why it doesn't feel like I ever make any forward movement. My life always feels so busy and full...but whenever I stop to think of what it is that is making me so "busy" I realize that if I wasn't so distracted I would probably have plenty of time to do what is required of me and still have a little left over.

I've really been struggling with the realization of how distracted I am. I come home and turn the TV on just because. When "nothing is on" I reach for my laptop. StumbleUpon is the devil...I literally just sit and kill time, only to lament that I don't have enough time to accomplish "everything I need to do". What a stupid cycle. I hate it...until I try to give it up.

Naturally the Christmas season only fuels my thought process. I went to Best Buy to get an co-ax adapter (it keeps pulling away from the wall, interfering with TV and Internet signals which, naturally, can not be tolerated).

Yeah yeah...my stories of seeing grown people publicly and physically fight over cheap, meaningless crap aren't a shock to anyone. And I'm obviously not the first person to note the obvious irony of thousands of people rushing around in search of items to hoard while "Silent Night" blares from speakers in the ceiling.

But this year a new-to-me thought hit me while I was standing in line to check out: "This place is a media crack house." That is to say that everybody here is looking for a distraction fix whether for themselves or for somebody else. It's super wack, really. I mean I bet most of the people in here didn't even come with anything specific in mind. They are just aimlessly browsing around picking up DVD's, rubbing their chins while reading specs on the side of an LED TV box, wandering back and forth between the cameras and computers, and assuring themselves out loud that "yeah, I think he'll really like it..."

I'm no different. Heck, my whole purpose in coming here was to fix my favorite distractions waiting for me at home.

Here's a horrifying thought: What if my computer broke? What if the TV quit working? What if my phone got turned off? Or, most simply, what if the power went off for a month?

I get the feeling that my number one concern wouldn't be figuring out how to keep my FOOD from going bad.

So here it is. Two forces that are juxtaposed in my life.

I beg God to be present and active in my life. To show me direction. To give me clarity. To shape and mold me into a better person. And I genuinely mean it.

But then I get distracted...like a baby who sees something shiny. I turn up the volume. I surf TV channels and the internet like the tide is coming in. I fling birds at pig fortresses for hours on my phone...and for what?

It would be a miracle if I heard Him shouting...much less speaking in a still, small voice...

God, trying to serve two masters is exhausting. Please break these chains. De-clutter my life. Help me to let go of these distractions, not just for the sake of letting something go, but for the sake of gaining clarity, purpose, and passion for things that last.

Matt Smith

noreply@blogger.com (Donnie) — Wed, 30 Nov 2011 22:26:00 +0000

A little number for Matt Smith's new iPhone 4S

Matt Smith by dpain03

One of These Things...

noreply@blogger.com (Donnie) — Mon, 03 Oct 2011 22:31:00 +0000

I just got back from the required all-day Foundations of Biblical Spirituality retreat. By the end of the day one thing became painfully clear...

Audit

noreply@blogger.com (Donnie) — Sat, 01 Oct 2011 05:48:00 +0000

It's Friday...we not excited. Instead, we so tired...we so very, very tired. But we is sitting behind a small metal desk in the corner of the University Towers dean's office listening to Switchfoot (that's pretty much all we ever listens to) because we is on duty until midnight. We has plenty of time to think right now.

Every now and again I randomly pause to audit the moment I'm in. What all had to take place in my life to find me sitting behind this metal desk sipping a Dr. Pepper to stay awake so I can eavesdrop on the collegiate flirt sesh going down in the lobby? Well, self, I got this job after moving here from California. We moved here because one day we got a phone call followed by a letter saying that it was voted by a committee that we move. We were in CA because we chose to move there to pursue what we thought was youth ministry. By "we" I mean my wife, Rachel, who I met while at Southern Adventist University. I went to SAU because my parents told me they didn't want me to go to Walla Walla...etc.

The first time I went through this momentary audit I was sitting in the parking lot of a Spanish-speaking SDA church in full Class-A Pathfinder threads waiting to officiate a combined induction/investiture program (something I had never done before) in a language I didn't speak. I remember sitting in our beloved Kia Sportage looking at the desolate lot (the program had been moved back by two hours because church had gone late) and genuinely wondering, "How the heck did I end up here...now...in this moment?"

It seems like the momentary audit is becoming more and more frequent. In the moving van, while unpacking boxes, in class, looking at the ceiling of our apartment at 2 am...sitting behind this desk.

There's a certain cognitive dissonance that comes with the realization that you are drifting farther and farther from where you want to be, especially when you aren't exactly sure where "there" is, you just know it isn't where you're at. I mean, whatever happened to all the exciting things I wanted to do as a kid...how come NONE of those things panned out? Why aren't I a fighter pilot or a race car driver? How come I'm not in a band or the NBA or a professional roller coaster critic? Or do all those people sit around and wonder why they aren't pastors? It seems like life just happens and every now and again I wake up, look around, and say, "Wait...what?!"

When does contentment become settling? Where is the balance between "being content in all things" and being honest with myself? Is this seriously what I was created for or simply the path of least resistance? Did I confuse convenience with calling? When will my life become "more abundant"? Or would I even know it if it slapped me in the face?

I feel like I've lost the ability to dream in almost every way. If I sleep at night I never seem to find myself in some surreal world with a ponytail that can connect with animals so that I can defend my planet against those who would destroy it in the process of harvesting precious "unobtainium".

But more significant still is the loss of the ability to dream practically. What is it that I want out of life? I mean really want? When all ulterior factors like money, power, fame, respect, etc. are stripped away...what's left? Because that's my true engine.

But what if nothing is left? What if nothing excites me anymore? What if nothing stirs my passion? What if all I have is almost total and utter indifference? Because that's exactly where I am...and I'm beginning to feel indifferent about it.

Meh...my shift is up...time to go home so I can do it again tomorrow...

Thrive

noreply@blogger.com (Donnie) — Wed, 28 Sep 2011 16:40:00 +0000

Been fighting things that I can't see in
Like voices coming from the inside of me and
Like doing things I find hard to believe in
Am I myself or am I dreaming?

I've been awake for an hour or so
Checking for a pulse but I just don't know
Am I a man when I feel like a ghost?
The stranger in the mirror is wearing my clothes

No I'm not alright
I know that I'm not right
A steering wheel don't mean you can drive
A warm body don't mean I'm alive
No I'm not alright
I know that I'm not right
Feels like I travel but I never arrive
I want to thrive not just survive

I come alive when I hear you singing
But lately I haven't been hearing a thing and
I get the feeling that I'm in between
A machine and a man who only looks like me

I try and hide it and not let it show
But deep down inside me I just don't know
Am I a man when I feel like a hoax?
The stranger in the mirror is wearing my clothes

No I'm not alright
I know that I'm not right
A steering wheel don't mean you can drive
A warm body don't mean I'm alive
No I'm not alright
I know that I'm not right
Feels like I travel but I never arrive
I want to thrive not just survive

I'm always close but I'm never enough
I'm always in line but I'm never in love
I get so down but I won't give up
I get slowed down but I won't give up

Been fighting things that I can't see in
Like voices coming from the inside of me and
Like doing things I find hard to believe in
Am I myself or am I dreaming?

No I'm not alright
I know that I'm not right
A steering wheel don't mean you can drive
A warm body don't mean I'm alive
No I'm not alright
I know that I'm not right
Feel like I travel but I never arrive
I want to thrive not just survive

-Switchfoot

Old School Photo

noreply@blogger.com (Donnie) — Fri, 23 Sep 2011 04:08:00 +0000

So Im finishing up the work day...or night...by installing a new keyboard on the student dean computer. (It's a PC so you have to install drivers for every piece of new hardware.) Naturally I needed to test the keyboard out so I googled myself and my dad's myspace page came up...so I visited it for a walk down memory lane. Well...his page lists Rachel as a top friend (remember when peoples feelings got hurt when they got bumped down or off somebody's top friend list?) So anyways...I went to Rachel's (DJ Classic) myspace page and found this.

Not gonna lie...i laughed for like 3 minutes. The keyboard works btw.

Peter Gibbons Syndrome

noreply@blogger.com (Donnie) — Fri, 23 Sep 2011 02:05:00 +0000

This is a self diagnosis. I have Peter Gibbons Syndrome.

It's an attitude issue mostly I suppose. But here's the odd thing...I feel like I've been trying to change my attitude for a while now and nothing seems to be working. I'm trying to eat healthy and exercise when I can find the time. I'm drinking more water and sleeping as much as my schedule/responsibilities will allow. I roll out of bed 30 minutes early so I can read something spiritual outside of class. I make videos in an effort to turn the mundane into something magical and exciting so that I can convince myself that, "oh snap...this place really is awesome!" If only life had a soundtrack...

I thought being organized would do the trick so I scheduled out my life via Google,pre-ordered my books from Amazon or borrowed them from friends, and have been going to classes every day...but I'm still behind...way behind. And it's seriously reeking havoc on how I view this place.

I hate it here. Nothing fancy...nothing witty. No qualifiers. I just freaking hate it. The honest to goodness truth is that each day here IS worse than the day before it...each day I fall a little further back in my studies and perform a little bit worse at work.

Greek. It's supposed to help me better understand the Bible...to capture all the neat little nuances that have been lost in translation. The problem is I barely understand the English version...when I pony up the will to read it anyway. The rest of my time is used up with spiritual busy-work and tossing the professor a few deep-looking, yeah-I'm-tracking-with-you-buddy head nods during the lecture. But the truth is I'm not tracking...I don't get any of this stuff because I have no zero time to process any of it...much less to spend with my wife.

"Balance is key to your success here," says the professor during chapel. Ten minutes later the same professor is giving out a stern warning in class that if you fall behind there will be no hope for you. True, ultimate success is determined by God and is comprised of the sum of your life choices. Unfortunately, and perhaps ironically, the place that is supposed to help train me to make those successful life choices, even to the point of helping others make successful life choices, defines success rather differently...paying a bit of lip service along the way to a few hearty "Amen!"'s during Tuesday morning chapel.

"It's graduate school...it's supposed to be hard." Yes. It is. And I have no problem with hard. I have a problem with unreasonable. I have a problem with ridiculous. I have a problem with double-standards. I have a problem with lack of vision, purpose, and mission...or at least the lack of communicating vision,purpose, and mission. Are you interested in ME, the individual, actually growing and learning...or are you content in saying that you taught the material and everything else is my problem? Do you actually want me to be a good pastor...or would you rather I filled out the all the necessary paper work while you wash your hands of any responsibility for my "training"?

I had an undergrad teacher that proposed the idea of people having to be twice as honest online as in person in order to achieve the same feeling of communication or level of community. He's right. I probably wouldn't say any of this to your face...or at least not in these words. You might even see me smiling in the Seminary Commons...but don't be fooled. Unless something radically changes...I'm hating nearly every second. And here's my question: How many of the people that I fist-bump in the hallway or exchange "broseph" finger-points with in the parking lot are in the same boat? Who knows...maybe they all really are having the time of their lives...

Lord, I really hope you know what you're doing...because this is making less and less sense to me all the time. I felt like I heard a call...but it seems so long ago that I'm having to strain to hear even an echo of it. I'll take whatever you got for me...cause I'm totally out of whatever I had...

I'd love to talk to you more but I'm in class learning about you right now so...maybe later...

Stuff We Did - BC Youth Fair

noreply@blogger.com (Donnie) — Mon, 19 Sep 2011 22:41:00 +0000

We went to the Berrien County Youth Fair to celebrate Katie's birthday a few weeks ago...I finally got around to editing it last sunday.

Stuff We Did - Chicago Weekend

noreply@blogger.com (Donnie) — Fri, 09 Sep 2011 17:36:00 +0000

Stuff We Did - Venetian Fest 2011

noreply@blogger.com (Donnie) — Sun, 17 Jul 2011 23:11:00 +0000

I'm trying to like Michigan...so I decided to start recording stuff we do to remind myself that my life is actually pretty rad...

"Neither"

noreply@blogger.com (Donnie) — Mon, 06 Jun 2011 15:29:00 +0000

“Now when Joshua was near Jericho, he looked up and saw a man standing in front of him with a drawn sword in his hand. Joshua went up to him and asked, “Are you for us or for our enemies?”

“‘Neither,’ he replied…”

“Neither”. None of the above. Not A. Not B. Not anything.

“Neither.” Really? I mean, maybe at first it makes sense…it’s just a guy standing out in the middle of nowhere with a drawn weapon who hasn’t decided who to fight for yet…but then he says he’s from heaven…and hasn’t chosen yet? Neither…really?!

This is God’s chosen people we’re talking about and you don’t know if you’re on our side?! What kind of confidence does that inspire? I thought we just crossed the Jordan in faith to take the land you promised us, God…and now your army commander is neutral? Should we go back? What kind of pep talk am I supposed to give these people? Neither?? Really??

“Neither.” What do you mean “neither”? For two years…neither. I mean is that a joke? And now we’re here…in faith we crossed the country in a U-Haul…neither??! We had options God…good options. We could have ended up in MD or GA…but we didn’t because you pointed us here…and now you don’t know if you’re on my side? Now we’re broke, living and working in a place we didn't think we ever would you say NEITHER?! REALLY??!

“‘Neither.’ he replied, ‘but as commander of the army of the LORD I have now come.’”

“Neither.” Yeah…you heard me right. I’m not on “your” side and I’m not on “their” side…because I’m on MY side. I command God’s army, I’m here, and I’m about to handle MY business. The question isn’t whether or not I want to be on your side…it’s whether or not you want to be on mine. Check my track record…I don’t lose…ever. And I take care of whoever’s on my team…so they don’t lose either…ever. So Joshua, Donnie…you can keep worrying about who’s on your side and whether or not it will be enough…or you can join My side. Neither. What’s it going to be?

Buyer's Remorse

noreply@blogger.com (Donnie) — Wed, 18 May 2011 15:29:00 +0000

Buyers remorse. The fear following a purchase that I got ripped off, or at least could have paid less somewhere else, that other’s won’t approve, or that a better version of the product will come out, making my purchase less valuable than what I paid. I struggle with it. I’ve even had to resist the notion of returning groceries because of buyers remorse.

A while ago I bought a new digital camera. It wasn’t cheap. For several days I was torn as I looked at my purchase. What if a better one comes out next week? What if it breaks right after the warranty expires? What if one of my friends knows where I could have gotten it cheaper? If I paid too much they’ll think I’m an idiot for sure.

Jesus bought me…and I wasn’t cheap. He didn’t just hop on the internet and order me from Amazon.com with a credit card. No, He cashed in His divinity so He could come down to the store, in person, and pay with His life. What’s more, I’m defective and He knew it before He paid. That’s right, Jesus Christ knowingly purchased a defective product in me.

Do I give Him buyers remorse? Does He ever look at me and wish He hadn’t paid so much…or paid at all? When He sees the version of me that I could be…Donnie 2.0 so to speak…and then sees me content to stay Donnie 1.5, does He want to return me for a refund? Does it bother Him that Satan laughs when my actions make His choice to pay for me look foolish?

No. It doesn’t. Because Jesus is in the business of refurbishing people. That’s what we mean by the word “Gospel”…good news. It means Jesus can take a worthless and broken product and fix it. And when He’s finished it’s more valuable than what He paid...to Him anyway...and that's all that matters.

So it’s impossible for Him to have buyers remorse because He sees value in humanity, a value that doesn’t diminish over time. He doesn’t want the latest version…He wants you…and He’ll pay full price. The question is do you want to be bought?

The Generation Gap

noreply@blogger.com (Donnie) — Sun, 03 Apr 2011 18:50:00 +0000

I'm not exactly sure how I came across this article written for "J-wire", a website dedicated to young Jews living in Australia and New Zealand...quite a bit of clicking in Google News I suppose. However, I found it rather interesting that a different religion operating on the other side of the planet has nearly the exact same problems as SDA's in North America: youth and young adults becoming disenfranchised with a religious leadership that seeks to fit them into existing church and community models while resisting new ideas simply because they are...well...not old ones.

The author quotes another article in which the situation is penned almost flawlessly:

“Rather than focusing on giving the younger generations the tools to define their involvement and their identity—empowerment and enfranchisement—the vast majority of the organized effort has been geared toward retention and replacement.”

The article is kind of long but the similarities between Australian Jews and North American Adventism in terms of youth and young adult involvement are striking. The link is below.

http://www.jwire.com.au/featured-articles/the-generation-gap/15958

what do i do?

noreply@blogger.com (Donnie) — Thu, 31 Mar 2011 07:31:00 +0000

What do I do when I’m about to move and nowhere near ready?

What do I do when my job drops a huge project on my plate that they've known about for months…19 days before I’m supposed to leave?

What do I do when I can’t find a home for an awesome dog that I don’t really want to give up anyway?

What do I do when I’m supposed to start school in a month…and still haven’t been accepted?

What do I do when I’m supposed to pay for a move I didn’t choose and I don’t have enough money?

What do I do when I’m leaving a system that is unhealthy, unprofessional, wasteful, uncaring, and broken…so I can study about it somewhere else?

What do I do when my attitude, my energy, my patience, and maybe even my faith have all hit rock bottom?

Seriously, God, what do I do? I’d really like to know…

Tube Amplifier

noreply@blogger.com (Donnie) — Wed, 23 Feb 2011 19:58:00 +0000

Classic vid i dug up starring ben foote. I think this was for digital video productions...circa 2005 or so...

Let The Beat Ride

noreply@blogger.com (Donnie) — Sun, 09 Jan 2011 08:24:00 +0000

This Christmas I got some beat production software...super ill. So you know I had to head to the studio and bang out a hit. Here it is...my first 100% all original track...so bump dis in yo tape deck playah! Sidenote: if heard on laptop speakers you are fully missing out...HALLA!

Let The Beat Ride by dpain03