Grumpy Old Blogger

I don't belieeeeeve it! itailor strikes again...

2012-01-28T03:46:00.000-08:00

The b*&%X!@s are at it again! itailor now wants to sell me some jeans. Whatever makes them think I would risk it after my last experience? Imagine trying to squeeze into jeans as well made as the shirt they sent ... see my earlier blog

Whatever you do, don't "START now!"

Will Newt rule the world?

2012-01-28T03:42:00.000-08:00

Apparently Newt Gingrich, in his early years as a politician, was coached by a Professor Chester Gibson.According to the Washington Post:

'Admirers say the Republican was always a dynamic speaker, but with flaws. He frowned. He tilted his head oddly and fell back repeatedly on the same words. He went for the rhetorical jugular. Supporters worried that TV cameras magnified those problems.'

Chester Gibson,now 70, says Gingrich’s problem was delivery, not substance.

It appears strong debate performances have kept alive Gingrich’s candidacy for the Republican nomination. Again from the Washington Post:

“Gingrich is clearly the best debater in the final four,” said Gibson, “No contest. A Gingrich-Obama debate would be one of the great moments in American political history.”

So given that his delivery is now up to scratch, will American voters overlook the substance? Let's hope not!

Remember that old TV series where lizards ruled over humans? I shudder to think what things could be like if the Newt became the most powerful man in the world.

British Airways - doncha hate 'em?

2011-12-04T03:45:00.000-08:00

Maybe a little less hateful than RyanAir, but still frustrating to deal with - have you tried speaking to them?

I recently bought a ticket online - £125.78. I subsequently received an email confirming my payment together with a breakdown of charges. No matter how I added these charges up, I could not get them to equal £125.78.

So I phoned customer support. Four times. Didn't get through once.

So I emailed customer relations. Received an acknowledgement with impressive speed. Then received another email:

Thank you very much for contacting us.

To be sure you have an answer from us as swiftly as possible, I would be grateful if you will speak to our customer support team. They deal with all pre-travel enquiries and they'll be happy to give you individual assistance.

@*$$£!!!

I wish I hadn't discovered Atlantis

2011-10-13T07:05:00.000-07:00

Not the fabled underwater city but firm of the same name with whom I have just concluded a very unsatisfactory relationship.

Without revisiting the painful details, the gist of the story is that I felt let down, badly served and generally unloved by an organisation that had happily taken money from me for a largely negative experience; not entirely but, to my mind, mainly ascribable to its own shortcomings.

The conclusion referred to above resulted in the firm conceding several points of contention and parting with a less-than-princely sum in compensation with the result that I am now only about £2500 out of pocket from the experience.

We live and learn - sometimes.

I liked the razor so much it was a shame about the carry case

2011-09-21T12:39:00.000-07:00

For some time now I had been meaning to buy myself a new beard trimmer. (Not a razor - so the gag in the title doesn't really work but WTH)

A few days ago I found myself in a branch of Boots that had a display of many trimmers. In consultation with the knowledgeable assistant, I settled on a Remington. Good name, good reputation and the late Victor Kayam had been so impressed ....

All went well at first. The trimmer trimmed adequately. The adjustable trimmer comb adjusted satisfactorily. The cleaning brush cleaned efficiently.

Then I decided to pack it away in its little fabric pouch and pop it into my wash-bag ready for my holiday. In went the trimmer. In went the moustache comb and cleaning brush. In DID NOT go the charging cord and plug. The pouch is too bloody small!!!
What a farce. Did it not occur to the doubtless university-educated and highly trained designer of this product that someone might want to use it elsewhere than at home? Where a carry-pouch would in any event have been redundant! Or was it designed with the continental 'small plug' market in mind and no-one could be bothered to adjust the spec for the UK market? Whatever the inadequate reason for this major blunder, it is all too symptomatic of the shoddiness of modern products.

BLACK MARK REMINGTON!!

Low cost airlines - are they an NHS plot?

2011-09-18T04:01:00.000-07:00

I've just been through the trauma of booking a cheap flight. Needless to report, my stress levels rocketed and my blood pressure went off the scale.

It's not just the irritating, petty charges and rules that upset me; it's the underhand way they are introduced. Why do I have to wait until I have spent 30 minutes wading through the complexities of the booking system before I find out what I will have to pay for the privilege of taking luggage with me? Depending on the airline involved, this item alone can make a previously apparent best buy uncompetitive. Do they really think I am not going to ditch them? Do they think the hassle I have been through (and will have to repeat with their competitors) will outweigh the fury I feel at their mendacity? It won't - I will trudge from airline to airline until I find the least despicable operator to give my money to.

And it will not necessarily be the cheapest. So the fact that UneasyJet appears at first glance 4p cheaper than Rypoffair will not save them when the baggage deal turns sour. And the aforementioned Rypoffair will have to be vastly, vastly price competitive to save them being dumped in favour of a slightly more expensive Beami who at least treat me like a member of the human race, albeit an oppressed minority member.

So, is it all a plot to drive me to an early grave and thus save the NHS a few quid on the drugs they currently supply to keep me going? It wouldn't surprise me; and it has to be a more likely conspiracy theory than that junk about the twin towers.

iTailor strikes again!

2011-07-17T04:40:00.000-07:00

Remember the i-Tailor? Well, not content with sending me the wrong shirt and absolutely refusing to do anything about it - or even admit his mistake - the S.O.B. has had the cheek to put me on his mailing list! In Vietnamese or Korean or something, so, to add insult, I can't tell whether he is trying to sell me something (fat chance!) or abusing me for complaining.

ดูหรือแสดงความคิดเห็นในโพสต์ของ iTailor Shirts »

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คุณได้รับข้อความนี้เนื่องจาก iTailor Shirts แบ่งปันกับ jim@jimewan.com ยกเลิกการสมัคร รับอีเมลเหล่านี้

See what I mean? Beware the i-Tailor! BTW, see below for me trying to fasten the too-small, wrong-spec, overpriced piece of garbage they landed me with!

Beware the i Tailor!

2011-05-23T01:38:00.000-07:00

Wow! I discovered an on-line tailor who would make me a made-to-measure shirt for £17.99! Well, not exactly - there was postage and stuff to add on and, once I had become a little creative with the spec it was going to come out at a little over £30. But that's pretty good for a genuine made-to-measure ...

So I ordered a shirt - quite excited; selected contrast fabric in collar and cuffs, specified collar shape, pocket shape etc etc. At £30+ it still seemed a bargain. Completely wrong shirt arrived - looked like basic £17.99 (which the enclosed invoice confirmed!) with collar way too small. I complained (nicely) and got a reply that said shirt was right but invoice wrong and £30+ invoice enclosed! Pointed out this not so - reply said yes it is, look at your order history. I tried but my account was blank apart from my address details. Emailed this fact and they replied saying sorry - technical problems check again. I did. Apart from the fact that my account, previously blank, now contains some very sparse (and new to me) order details, it also specifies the size to be 'SML' which looks very much like three sizes to me!

And now they are ignoring my emails!

Why do they imagine I would complain if I had got what I ordered? I would have bought another half-dozen! I think I am probably banging my head against a brick wall but I just wanted to warn everyone about the problems I have had.

And incidentally, the problems many others have had - see http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.php?t=2721767 for pages of complaints

Thames Water update for those with long memories

2011-03-18T08:08:00.000-07:00

Back in 2009 I began trying to get a refund from Thames Water for a service they charged for but did not provide to me - surface water drainage. TW was, of course, unhelpful and obstructive.

I complained to the Consumer Council for Water. A very nice lady did her best but the Council was, of course, feeble and useless.

But, hey, I found a new clause on the back of this year's bill - top right, saying I could appeal. So I did.

And now I have, at last, received a reduced bill.

Now to begin pushing for a refund for the 24 years that they have been overcharging me!

I'll keep you posted - so check again in two years!

And check your bill NOW! Turn over, top right, see what it says about surface water. If you are being charged and you don't seem to be getting the service, check your water company's website to see how to appeal.

What's going on at the Info Shark?

2011-03-14T10:22:00.000-07:00

Me, looking puzzled. An old picture - I haven't been puzzled for ages. Until now!

What's puzzling me? Trying to figure out what's new at the Info Shark. Not much it seems.

No updates for weeks ... no response to emails ... no longer claiming to be associated with Simon Cowell.

Information and rumours welcome.

Guest grump - T-Mobile and Philips

2011-03-07T02:07:00.000-08:00

From Frank Legroux, entrepreneur and bon viveur

Let me tell you of my T-Mobile experience a few years ago. When I was getting nowhere with T-mobile I found out that they were owned by Deutsche Telecom. I then phoned DT in Bonn, requested and was put through to the Chairman's PA, who readily gave me her e-mail address to which to send my request for service. Shortly after e-mailing her I was contacted by a most apologetic, courteous and concerned senior employee of T-Mobile in the UK, who took immediate and effective action to sort out the problem I was having. I hope that this is of help to you and/or anyone else who reads it.

Health Warning: This tactic doesn't always work! I tried it subsequently with Philips over a defective Philips-branded laptop sold in PC World to an acquaintance for her daughter. The upshot was that the Philips global head office in the Netherlands declined to communicate with me (i.e. told me to get lost). I then managed rather too readily to talk to the PA to the UK boss. It took her a week and my reminding her to badger her colleagues to discover that the product was not made by or for Philips, which had licensed use of its name for the product to the Dixon's Store Group. Philips had no further interest in the matter.

These are my first comments on this site; I do hope that they are sufficiently grumpy..

Yes, I did star in Robin Hood!

2010-12-22T08:55:00.000-08:00

For those of you who wondered could that ~~scruffy blok~~e devilish handsome chap in the ~~crowd~~ foreground be .....? The answer is yes!

MERRY CHRISTMAS AND ALL THE BEST FOR 2011

Best birthday ever!

2010-12-20T12:54:00.000-08:00

Still recovering from the best birthday ever. Full of carefully crafted surprises created by the boss (Kate):

A day at Nirvana Spa

                                      flotation pool
                                      'gent's' facial (but they let me in anyway)
                                      foot pampering

Dinner party with all my favourite people

                                     AND A MAGICIAN!! I've never had a magician at my party.

And not just any old magician - the magnificent John Hotowka!!! Everyone was baffled, especially the newly-christened Morgans. If you are having a party/conference/convention/wedding/anything, book John H - find him at www.hotowka.co.uk. No, I don't get commission. Yet.

BTW I am now 70 and officially "retired''. But still available at a price.

Have a Merry Christmas.

And, to top it all off, I got a Kindle!

T-Mobile trying to immobilise me!

2010-12-12T08:11:00.000-08:00

A few short weeks ago I upgraded my mobile phone - to a smartphone! Or smartarse phone as it seems to be cleverer than me. ("Not difficult." I can hear my lovely wife, Kate, remark.)

One of the great 'apps' that my new phone has is a FREE satnav. Called Co-Pilot, it is excellent.

One of the not-so-great accessories was the in-car charger. It did not fit my phone. Since said Co-Pilot is a bit heavy on battery power, I really need a charger that works. I called T and sweetly explained there had been a tiny error. I refrained from suggesting their staff were anything other than intelligent, diligent human beings and was rewarded with the suggestion that I nip into my local T shop and exchange the charger for one that did fit.

Still in sweet mode, I popped over to Reading (not my favourite place to visit at the best of times) and headed for the local outlet. Sadly, they had apparently never stocked my particular phone and therefore had no suitable chargers. They very kindly phoned somewhere (HQ? The warehouse? Who knows?) and arranged for the correct item to be despatched forthwith. They also offered to let me keep the charger I had taken in. Since it was of no conceivable use to me, I left it with them to dispose of as they saw fit.

Around 10 days later I became tired of waiting and phoned T again. The 'customer service' centre is, of course, located in a distant land whose inhabitants speak English with heavy accents. And why should they not? They have at least gone to the trouble of learning English which is more than I can claim with regard to their native tongue. However, it does tend to make any but the simplest of exchanges somewhat tricky.

Eventually though, the lady I was speaking with confirmed that a replacement would shortly be on its way. She even phoned back a short time later to ask a question I cannot remember and again confirmed that my charger would be with me in 5 to 7 days.

That also was around 10 days ago so now I am seriously pissed off. And am about to phone T yet again.

10 minutes later

Well, I called and explained my predicament. There was a baffled silence from the nice man (actually, it may not have been baffled at all; maybe he was just hoping I would lose interest and ring off). Then I was asked to hold on. I did. Nice man came back and thanked me for waiting. He explained that his PC had decided to go AWOL and he would have to restart it; could he call me back in 15 to 20 minutes?

1 hour later

Strange - he hasn't called back. I hope he's okay. BECAUSE I AM BLOODY WELL NOT!

The easiest job in the world

2010-12-07T13:19:00.000-08:00

Fancy a job where you get paid for doing nothing most of the time?

Where you need absolutely no qualifications or skills?

Where you never have to take responsibility for anything?

Where they feed you all you can eat three times a day?

Where you get to meet all kinds of people, including some very weird ones?

Where you choose whether or not to go to work?

Well, why not become a movie extra (or "supporting artiste" if you want to be precious about it).

"What!" I hear you cry, "This is the perfect job! There must be a catch, Jim. What is the downside?"

Well, it can be very boring doing nothing most of the time. But you can always take a book. Plus it is not very well paid. But they do feed you. Oh, and you usually have to get to work very early. But that means you miss all the rush-hour traffic. And you frequently finish pretty late. But that means you miss all the rush-hour traffic.

Also the work can be very intermittent, so it probably isn't a smart career move. And you sometimes have to dress up in silly clothes and have strange things done to your beard and hair. (If you're a lady, ignore the beard bit. Probably.)

But it just has to be the easiest job in the world. Unless you know different?

Microsoft - not so clever

2010-11-30T05:19:00.000-08:00

A few months ago I received a message from dear old Microsoft warning me that my Office suite sported a key sequence that belonged to another. Honest, guv, I thought it was kosher when I bought it down the market!

I consulted one of my gurus (Dave Whyatt of Limephusion - a useful contact if you are having PC problems) and he suggested I download the beta version of Office 2010. So I did.

Apart from a little hair-tearing as I trekked up the learning curve, all went well.

Then, a couple of weeks ago I received another Microsoft missive telling me my time was up and I would have to part with some money (£250 or thereabouts) within 72 hours or cease using their software. Making a mental note to comply, I went about my business. And forgot all about it.

About three days later, I opened up Outlook to find myself barred from entry; my emails drifting in and masked from view by Microsoft's bloody big notice.

Of course I was barred from all other parts of the package also. All was not lost however as I managed to pick up a copy of Office 2010 (brand new, shrink wrapped) for a mere £99 over at eBay.

After a bit more hair-tearing and guru assistance, I managed to install said package and get on with my stuff.

Now here is the interesting bit.

Along with all my other newly-accessible emails was one from Microsoft offering a 'click here to buy now' button for acquiring Office 2010 ( at their, price of course - see earlier).

But I had not received this email because Microsoft had locked me out of Outlook! Had they been a bit brighter, I would almost certainly have 'clicked here' just to save myself hassle.

Okay, my extra £100 or so will not make that much difference to profits - but how many other absent-minded beta users also bought elsewhere, so that other vendors copped a share of Microsoft's money?

Maybe if I contact Microsoft and point this out, they will buck their ideas up and give me a slice of the extra revenue? Probably not, so sod 'em.

Read this book!

2010-10-31T05:03:00.000-07:00

My old mate, Graham Davies, has come up with a humdinger of a book (I believe 'humdinger' is a popular expression amongst the young). Sadly, it has a rubbish title which will doubtless adversely impact his sales, but once you get past that, the content is brilliant.

BTW Don't 'click to look inside'. I copied the pic from Amazon 'cos my scanner has packed up and, of course, the link doesn't work.

If you do not know Graham, he is one of the country's foremost (and funniest) business speakers. And he has one of the best contracts in the western world; as he should have, being a barrister. I think 'barrister' is what they were calling him anyway.

The Presentation Coach, published by Capstone, is being featured by WHSmith Travel as one of their Top 20 business books. It is written in Graham's punchy, assertive and entertaining style and forcefully attacks all the old presentational clichés. It is certainly not something that should be read by the faint-hearted.

Essentially, the book shows you how to Say It, Support It....and Shut it. The distinctive bare knuckle approach is one that can be used no matter what presentational situation you are in, says Graham .... whether it's a Boardroom, Ballroom or Broadcast Studio. I would add only Bordello to the list.

This is a set of techniques that Graham has used to coach a host of CEOs, Politicians and Celebrities.....and these clients have given the book a spectacular collection of endorsements. None as spectacular or effective as mine, and I'm not getting any commission. Or even a complimentary copy!

If you need to talk to groups (and who doesn't) you should read this book.

And you should also join your local Toastmasters speaking club. Go to http://www.toastmasters.org/ to find out where it is. This organisation is the dog's thingys when it comes to improving your communication skills, no matter how terrifed and inexperienced or how confident and experienced you may be. And they don't pay me commission either!

Never too old - the end of the road?

2010-10-25T13:36:00.000-07:00

Well, here we are; I've touched 12:5.0 (as in just after a bike ride, before breakfast and with one foot on the scales).
Not really - both feet were on but I did breathe out 'cos air has a weight.

And now I must call a halt to my attempt to get down to 12 stones. why? Pressure from my female fans.~~She~~ they say I am getting too skinny. And I have to admit I looked in the mirror the other day and wondered who the haggard old man was.

So I shall settle for 12:7 ish and think myself lucky - for now. I guess that will give me more time to bitch about the people and companies who upset me. Actually only Santander at the moment, though Ed Milliband becomes more irritating day by day.

For now, savour this 'final' picture of the magnificent specimen I have become

Never too old - 12

2010-10-11T07:00:00.000-07:00

12:7.0

This is getting hard!

I've really been trying this week and only managed to slice off 1.4 pounds. Obviously I have not been trying hard enough!

However, always look on the bright side of life (da dum da dum ...), I am considerably less portly that I was in July and still have a couple of weeks to go.

Apologies for picture quality - the boss went out at the crack of dawn and she usually takes them!

Never too old - 11

2010-10-05T03:16:00.000-07:00

12:8.4

Not good enough! I only have 21 days to go; that's 3 weeks and, at 1 pound a week (last week was 12:9.4) I'll be way off. So, despite the long days on set (did I mention I'm a movie star more than several times?) when I cannot fit in my exercise/cycling, I am aiming to drop 0:3.0 per week. Looks like lots of salad and no biccies!

Pics are looking better though:

Never too old ... to lose weight and get fit 10

2010-09-27T00:31:00.000-07:00

Hectic week. Meetings, visit to Mike Ker, judging a heat in the College of Public Speaking Corporate Challenge, planning world domination and sticking (nearly) to my weight and fitness plan.

The bad news is I am forbidden to run - and advised not to walk too much either! This from Mike K, my new guru (see last post).

It seems I may have torn something in my left foot and the tendons in both feet are in trouble because my arches are sagging.

So I am reduced to cycling, waving dumbells about and doing stretch and massage.

But despite the setbacks, I have dropped to 12:9.4! That's a mere 177 and a bit pounds - a shadow of my former self - see below.

No, that's not my former self, that's my magnificent new physique! See July 26 for the fat old me.

BTW if you are looking for tips, I am finding that putting off eating until 11:00 or 12:00 is having some effect. I know 'breakfast is the most important meal of the day' etc - I'm just having it later on! Try it but I recommend you have plenty to drink early in the day.

Never too old 9 - oh dear, oh dear!

2010-09-20T00:55:00.000-07:00

If you read last week's report, you may recall I promised to astonish the world this week. Well ....

On Friday I severely damaged my already damaged heel and I've been hobbling around ever since. That's my excuse for 12.11.4 (my new annotation for stones, pounds and decimals of pounds). So in the past two weeks I have gained 1.2 pounds. Not good.

I have 4.5 weeks to drop 11.4 pounds. And I may have to do it without running!

Or I may not because (roll of drums) tomorrow I go to visit Mike Ker MSMA, MBCPA (http://www.mikeker.co.uk/) the renowned sports and remedial massage practitioner and body control Pilates teacher!

Progress report next week - now I'm off to decobweb my bike and try some non-impact training.

An old friend passes on ...

2010-09-19T08:07:00.000-07:00

My faithful BMW has been laid to rest!

On Wednesday last, some jerk in a flat-bed truck with a load of scrap iron on board took a bend too fast. A big chunk of scrap flew off and removed the front end of the beamer. And the jerk didn’t even stop!

Fortunately there was a scrap yard about ¼ mile further on, so I wheeled it in and got £100 for it.

With a rare example of synchronicity, my wife, Kate, had just bought herself another car and was looking to sell her wee Peugeot. So I am a few quid lighter and the proud owner of same.

I have to say a BMW was never going to be my first choice but this was a real bargain and the car has been great. It hasn’t cost me a penny apart from a couple of tyres and an annual service. So I was sorry to see it go but onwards and upwards …

Santander ... the never-ending story

2010-09-17T09:37:00.000-07:00

On 20 August I posted a sad tale about my bankers - Santander. As promised, I emailed them. About three days later I received an acknowledgement. On 15 September, I received a more detailed, though useless, response. Below is a transcript of my email and the 'more detailed' response.

Dear Bankers

On 20 August I discovered that I could not access my main business account. On calling the bank, I was told that this was because I had been sent a new card, which I should have received by then. Apparently there was nothing that could be done to enable me to access my account but the new card would surely be with me "tomorrow or the day after".

On 27 August I was able to access the account. - it appeared twice on the list - but unable to access my e-saver account. When I telephoned this time the story had changed. Now it was a problem related to the recent "improvement" Santander had been making to its IT systems. This was apparently a "known issue", whatever that means, but there was still no way for me to access my account. On 28 August I received a letter, dated simply "June 2010", containing my new card and various instructions.

To summarise; I have been without access to one or other of the accounts I hold with Santander for at least 10 days. The bank is unable to tell me when I will have complete access. It would seem that your customers are being used to beta-test (whatever that means) systems created by a clearly incompetent IT division. Under the circumstances I feel it only right that the bank compensates me for the inconvenience and potential damage to my business. I therefore request payment at the rate of £25 per day for the lack of access, which seems to be in line with current banking procedures, and £15 per phone call I have been forced to make to try to resolve the situation. I calculate that, to date, I should receive £175 for lack of access and £30 for telephone calls; a total of £205. Please credit this amount to my account number above. With two chances to access it I should be able to find out when the money has arrived. I will contact you again when you have finally resolved the problem regarding further payment.

Sincerely J. Ewan

Please note that the italics in the message below are mine - just a couple of things that struck me as bizarre!

Dear Mr Ewan,

We are writing to let you know that we have received your complaint. Thank you for contacting us and telling us about your concerns.

At Santander we want to keep our customers happy, however we know that sometimes things can go wrong and we welcome complaints as an opportunity to improve the service we offer you.

In the first instance, your comments need to be addressed by the area of Santander you have an issue with. As some of our products have specialist complaint teams, I have forwarded your complaint to the relevant department to be investigated.

We will endeavour to keep you regularly informed of the progress of your complaint.

To find out more about the Complaints Procedure we have set up to make sure you receive a quick and fair reply - please visit our website:

www.santander.co.uk

• Select ‘How Do I?' from the top of the page

• Then click on ‘Contact Us'

• Select ‘Feedback and Complaints' from the drop down list followed by ‘Customer Satisfaction'

If you would like to talk to us about anything else please give us a call. To find the most appropriate telephone number:

• Click on ‘Contact Us' in the top right-hand corner

• Click on the relevant product type

Regards

Jason Cheeseman

Customer Relations Officer

Santander

So far no sign of any money coming in to my account!

I will endeavour to keep you, dear reader of this blog, regularly informed of the progress of my complaint.

Never too old 8 - oh dear!

2010-09-12T08:18:00.000-07:00

I've been working all week - Monday I ran a public speaking workshop and Tuesday to Saturday I was on a film set from 7am to 7pm, arriving home knackered around 8pm.

So, my sole run of the week was today. and as a result - 12 stone 10.6 pounds. Nearly 4 ounces up!

Next week will be different though; I have only two days work and the rest of the week off. So it will be strict alternate days - run and weights - and my next weigh in will astonish the world (well, the 3 people who read my blog at least!)

That's all for now!