tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15644438322535089622024-09-06T17:26:15.173-07:00Those offended by plain speaking and attitude: You can leave now. Exit is thataway. Git. Buh-bye. The rest of you: You can stay and comment if you want. But no gum-snapping. Andy Rooney, eat yer heart out. I might even be grumpier than You.MK (Casey) van Bronkhorsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03296157235459890762noreply@blogger.comBlogger34125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1564443832253508962.post-16486773483646850252009-05-26T20:11:00.001-07:002009-05-26T20:15:11.794-07:00

Never thought I'd say this out loud, but the way things have been going for the past few months - nay, the year of 2009 - has left me with little time or energy to string enough words together to write coherent blog posts. Me, at a loss for words?! Giddoutahere, I hear you mutter as you suppress giggles. Some consider it a mixed blessing when I do run out of things to say and pithy ways to

MK (Casey) van Bronkhorsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03296157235459890762noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1564443832253508962.post-1541720054971975902008-10-26T17:40:00.000-07:002008-10-26T18:48:16.894-07:00

If I'm going to run for office in four years, I better start making plans. I have a list of campaign promises prepared, and I will release them to my ardent followers as time passes.So, I solemnly swear that, if elected:I will lower Artificially Boosted Expectations across the Board.I will Fix the Skool Sistem.I will not impose a 140% Federal Income Tax.I will institute National Wealth Care -

MK (Casey) van Bronkhorsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03296157235459890762noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1564443832253508962.post-8410853096022592512008-10-26T17:33:00.000-07:002008-10-26T17:39:52.990-07:00

You might think that, with all the politics flying through the air, I'd be grumpier in this past few months. I'm not. I think pre-election campaign television rates just two steps above soap opera, and two steps below soap opera in believability. On November 4th, someone will be President. Someone will be Vice President. Someone else won't be. Many someone elses, for that matter. And on

MK (Casey) van Bronkhorsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03296157235459890762noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1564443832253508962.post-26370710190066943782008-08-25T17:57:00.000-07:002008-08-25T18:05:02.076-07:00

I just got told my posts are too long. This pleases me greatly when Someone Else speaks up about what they do and don't like. I am No Longer Alone! My posts will no longer be too long. Only long enough to convey the message.[note to self: invent Sarcasm HTML tag]

MK (Casey) van Bronkhorsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03296157235459890762noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1564443832253508962.post-26554590015046501762008-08-25T17:28:00.000-07:002008-08-25T17:57:08.940-07:00

Today I discovered a problem. This problem could cost its company tens of thousands of dollars in lost profits, and far more than that in lost revenue. Like a good Girl Scout, I did my very best to bring it to the attention of the people who stand to lose this revenue.Perhaps, since it is a Monday and everyone's mood is a tad Monday'ish, the response I encountered was a rousing 'whatever.'

MK (Casey) van Bronkhorsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03296157235459890762noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1564443832253508962.post-37577341465204571182008-08-20T15:04:00.000-07:002008-08-20T15:27:46.729-07:00

Gentle readers who have been following my rambling for a while know that I am a person of infinite patience and even temper when it comes to real life events. It is an unspoken rule that here is where my grumpiness emerges, not elsewhere. (ok, you can stop with the snickering now)I must confess that this rule of mine was nearly broken - nay, shattered beyond repair today in the face of yet

MK (Casey) van Bronkhorsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03296157235459890762noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1564443832253508962.post-71004164454122918562008-08-06T16:30:00.001-07:002008-08-06T16:38:53.306-07:00

I'm one year grumpier than last time we chatted.When I woke up today and checked my email, I had 67 one-line cheerful bouncy Happy Birthday messages from forums where I don't even recall signing up (and four I'm pretty sure I don't belong to). Oh, and eighteen more heart-felt pleas for me to assist moving millions of dollars out of Nigeria from Dear Best Friends.All I can say is thank goodness

MK (Casey) van Bronkhorsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03296157235459890762noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1564443832253508962.post-56967048469003679402008-07-10T17:08:00.000-07:002008-07-10T17:13:34.605-07:00

Google is my new best-friend-forever. How do I know this? Easy - over a dozen people I've never met have emailed me to tell me so in the past day. Google replaced a colored bar with numbers. The implications are huge. The enthusiasm over the transparency, on the other hand, is what's curious. Google, so far ahead of the pack in so many things, is now catching up to much smaller keyword

MK (Casey) van Bronkhorsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03296157235459890762noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1564443832253508962.post-10533531373433307282008-07-10T16:12:00.000-07:002008-07-10T16:20:53.620-07:00

A friend of mine is under 'stalker' attack. Every time she turns around, there's this guy. He's chased her from social bookmark site to a social network to another website to another social network to another social bookmark site, and on and on. Friendly fan? Sicko weirdo? She can't tell, but it's freaking her out.Advice welcome. She is my friend and I do not want her scared of the surf. It

MK (Casey) van Bronkhorsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03296157235459890762noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1564443832253508962.post-12352969004474943302008-07-06T11:17:00.000-07:002008-07-06T11:27:08.036-07:00

I signed up for something last week, unchecked the default-checked Check This If You Wish To Hear About Special Offers From Our Partners checkbox, read the Terms 'n Conditions and Privacy Statements before pushing any final buttons.Within two days my email inbox began filling up with dozens and dozens of Special Offers From Our Partners Only Available Through This Email Right Now! stuff.I nav'd

MK (Casey) van Bronkhorsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03296157235459890762noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1564443832253508962.post-44661440274160089932008-07-04T12:17:00.000-07:002008-07-08T11:00:36.370-07:00

So I had a bit of a problem with a piece of electronic gear the other day. Checked the obvious and less obvious: Yes, power. Yes, power at the outlet. No, have not operated while showering.Checked the troubleshooting guide in the back of the manual. Followed the usual suspects through to elimination.Ran the recommended diagnostics. Twice. Joyless results.Checked the manufacturer's website for

MK (Casey) van Bronkhorsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03296157235459890762noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1564443832253508962.post-23288926696312375712008-07-04T11:41:00.000-07:002008-07-08T11:06:17.613-07:00

I made a mistake today. I IM'd a "Happy Fourth of July!" to a coworker in New Jersey. I might as well have thrown a stink bomb into the foyer of LA's finest dining establishment."What the HELL are we celebrating!?" he exploded in response. "Our so-called leadership is comatose, our military is enslaved to a conflict that can't POSSIBLY be resolved, our economy is sinking like a stone, gas

MK (Casey) van Bronkhorsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03296157235459890762noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1564443832253508962.post-11548355756955973702008-06-29T13:23:00.000-07:002008-06-29T13:52:14.930-07:00

An acquaintance of mine IM'd me to warn me that she was pretty sure she'd broken the Internet.I asked her why she would think such a thing.Her web browser told her so.I thanked her for letting me know... *** insert barely-suppressed giggle ***Then she asked if I could fix it.'The Internet?'"yes! I broke it!!"uhh'I don't think you can actually break th-'"one sec.. I'll quit the Internet so you

MK (Casey) van Bronkhorsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03296157235459890762noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1564443832253508962.post-31923091623370325762008-06-29T11:58:00.000-07:002008-06-29T13:10:27.019-07:00

Big-Everything-Under-One-Roof-Mart is like a huge stuffed lion on the savannah. It threatens by its very presence - eek, a big lion! It consumes no gazelles. Yet invariably some of the erstwhile gazelle prey panic and fall into a dead faint at the sight of it. Then the bodies decay and the bones keep piling up. Soon crowds of gazelles are pointing fearfully in the direction of the big stuffed

MK (Casey) van Bronkhorsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03296157235459890762noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1564443832253508962.post-63816527704393293672008-06-26T20:04:00.000-07:002008-06-26T21:01:35.962-07:00

Twelve difficult marketing lessons for the wanna-be internet entrepreneur:1 - It's ok to reach out and talk to someone without trying to get them to buy your stuff. 2 - Everyone wants you to buy their stuff.2a - You want everyone to buy your stuff.2b - Not everyone wants to buy your stuff.|!2b - Someone will want to buy your stuff, maybe someday. Don't beat the idea out of them.3 - Shoving your

MK (Casey) van Bronkhorsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03296157235459890762noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1564443832253508962.post-78702515939967816472008-06-26T16:42:00.000-07:002008-07-08T11:00:14.185-07:00

Read this aloud in a tone and vocal timbre that reflects the seriousness of the statement. Time yourself. You have 10 seconds. [Start Exercise]Do not breathe.Start Now.Some restrictons apply Offer may not be valid in your state Please check local listings for date and time Offer may not be combined with any other offer from this company This ad does not reflect typical weight loss results with

MK (Casey) van Bronkhorsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03296157235459890762noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1564443832253508962.post-87669551797746978232008-06-24T19:02:00.000-07:002008-06-25T18:24:45.693-07:00

Please hold until the next available operator can take your call.[insert 15 seconds of Muzak at eardrum-puncturing volume]Your call is very important to us. Please hold for the next available operator.[insert 10 seconds of Muzak at eardrum-piercing levels]Your call is very important to us. Please hold for the next available operator.[insert 10 seconds of Muzak at eardrum-piercing levels]Your call

MK (Casey) van Bronkhorsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03296157235459890762noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1564443832253508962.post-42423982702569699362008-06-24T18:15:00.001-07:002008-06-26T12:47:06.755-07:00

... and fishes for the multitudes.What on earth possesses a company to use a 18" square cardboard box and two yards of bubble-wrap to ship a 12-pack of AA-cell batteries.They must think cardboard grows on TREES or something!

MK (Casey) van Bronkhorsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03296157235459890762noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1564443832253508962.post-54955457177587720492008-06-24T17:49:00.000-07:002008-06-24T18:14:59.622-07:00

If you want to tag a business website as amateur, look for the section about how hard they worked on it. Somewhere on the site, they wax eloquent about the thousands of hours they've put into spittin' and polishin', shinin' and prettifyin' just so that 'your visit and experience at La De Freakin' Dah Company LLC will be the best possible ever.' They'll probably go on and on and on about the

MK (Casey) van Bronkhorsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03296157235459890762noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1564443832253508962.post-26541248431335283702008-06-23T16:56:00.000-07:002008-07-08T11:04:14.957-07:00

Certain causal celebrities, accidental inhabitants of the footlights, heroes of the moment, rescuer of THREE cats from one tree during a dangerous spring butterfly swarm - commendable, all! But some of the media fail to realize how far 15 minutes should be stretched."Chet, we're here with octogenarian Melvis Goldfarb, whose purse was snatched not once but TWICE in the same year on the treacherous

MK (Casey) van Bronkhorsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03296157235459890762noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1564443832253508962.post-55349544118278323852008-06-22T16:30:00.000-07:002008-06-22T16:40:52.512-07:00

Our cable company inserts ads for local businesses on several channels. I have no idea how much the cable company charges for this service, but the businesses should get a full refund for every broadcast ever made, on any channel, to make up for the loss of any possible business gain they could have gotten from the broadcasts - and here's why.Sitting quietly and watching a nice calm episode of

MK (Casey) van Bronkhorsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03296157235459890762noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1564443832253508962.post-77101149313942633942008-06-21T21:25:00.001-07:002008-07-08T11:05:09.770-07:00

Lovingly add to the list of Things That P*** Me Off: Nanny Labels.You know the ones. They assume that just because you're smart enough to read, you're not necessarily smart enough to think. Toss logic out the window and just read the box. Please read all instructions carefully before proceeding. Warning. Do Not Use This Hair Dryer In The ShowerCaution: Product May Be Cold (spotted on an

MK (Casey) van Bronkhorsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03296157235459890762noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1564443832253508962.post-287788332832031072008-02-12T12:51:00.000-08:002008-02-12T13:27:15.309-08:00

Somewhere out there, there are people so totally starved for affection that they will fall for the insanely sappy entree lines to some of the biggest scams on the planet. These leader lines, designed to tug feebly at your heartstrings, Dear Beloved in Christ, It is by the grace of God that I received Christ, having known the truth; I had no choice than to do what is lawful and just in the sight

MK (Casey) van Bronkhorsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03296157235459890762noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1564443832253508962.post-21699342453171046502008-02-07T18:59:00.000-08:002008-02-07T19:09:09.322-08:00

Congratulations! You have won a free Electronic Thingie!! Just because you're so sweet and kind and lovely and wonderful and happened to be here this very moment to open your email!! We just think you're just the bestest thing EVER for doing so, and since we are SO thrilled to see your shining face in front of your screen, we're going to GIVE you this piece of valuable electronic gear FREE and

MK (Casey) van Bronkhorsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03296157235459890762noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1564443832253508962.post-58573728130841074622008-02-07T18:49:00.000-08:002008-02-07T18:57:03.831-08:00

Yes, that was the lad's exact words. He may have been about 14, perhaps 15. Indeed. How dare I be upset over something so small as a broken headlight and dented fender. After all, even though I witnessed him deliver each blow from the first one to the last, as I stood a mere 50 feet away - what on earth gave me the right to be upset?! The car was in his way, parked as it was in the supermarket

MK (Casey) van Bronkhorsthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03296157235459890762noreply@blogger.com0