This article was originally published on February 1st, 2012 by Andy Isaac and this foreword is written buy BroBible’s EIC, Cass Anderson. Ads on this page have been turned off out of respect. Andy passed away on March 6th, 2025 after a decades-long battle with cancer. His family shared a message that he passed away peacefully beside his loving family. They shared that Andy was “a genuine space of laughter and kindness” and they asked that everyone “carry on this spirit” in his honor.

Andy was a true friend. Someone I’d known for much of my adult life. Along with Chris Spagnuolo and Douglas Charles, we’d co-founded Guyism.com together back in 2009 and much of what I know about this business I learned from Isaac. I never called him Andy unless I was really trying to get his attention. It was always Isaac.

Back in 2015, long after Guyism and and BroBible were merged, he asked me if I could find his chili recipe. I looked in our archives but couldn’t find it. The recipe appeared to have been lost in the site migration. But I recently dug deeper to find it and I emailed him to him last month after he announced he was entering hospice. Andy’s love of food was unmatched and well-documented. Through ‘Faturday’ he spread the gospel of good eating so I wanted to republish his personal chili recipe today for those out there whose lives were touched by Andy in some way. Make this chili, remember the light within him, and carry on his spirit of kindness.

Andy Isaac’s Chili Recipe

Are you hosting a Super Bowl party on Sunday? Are you looking for something that will blow away your guests? Try this spicy chili recipe that I’ve personally tweaked for almost a decade. It’s also a recipe I’ve never shared with anyone, so yes, you should feel special.

This recipe serves 12-15 people, so you’ll have to adjust for the number of guests at your party.

Here’s what you need to do.

1.5 lbs of ground beef (use something that contains at least 20% fat)
1.5 lbs of spicy Italian sausage (go to your butcher and ask them to grind it for you)
6-8 small onions, chopped
3-4 cloves garlic, minced
3 Poblano peppers, chopped

Saute the onions and garlic in a large frying pan. When the onions become translucent, thrown in the Poblano peppers. After 2-3 minutes, add the meat until it’s cooked thoroughly (no pink). Add salt, pepper and a few shakes of Worcestershire sauce and stir.

With me so far?

Grab a large pot, preferably one that can hold several quarts of liquid. The bigger, the better.

Add the following (drop 1):

24 oz tomato paste
3 cans diced tomatoes chili ready
32oz tomato sauce
3 14.5 oz cans of low sodium beef broth
6 tpsp chili powder
3 tbsp cumin
3 tbsp garlic
2 Jalapenos, whole
4 Serranos, whole
1 Habanero, whole

Obviously, the type of chili powder you use is crucial. Go with a hotter Chiptotle or Mexican if you want something closer to a five-alarm—an Ancho chili powder will suffice if you don’t want to test your guests’ spice palettes.

Boil 30 minutes on med-high heat. Remove the peppers and allow them to cool for a few minutes before giving them a rough chop and throwing them back into your cauldron. I like to include the seeds but it’s understandable if you want to leave it out (wimp!).

Measure out the following ingredients and mix them together in a small bowl (drop 2).

3 tbsp cumin
12 tbsp chili powder
3 tbsp brown sugar
3 tbsp garlic
3 tbsp paprika
1 tbsp black pepper
2-3 tbsp cayenne (personal preference here)
1.5 tbsp basil
1.5 tbsp Mexican oregano

Then add:

3 cups chicken broth
2 beef bullion cubes
2 chicken bullion cubes

Cover and simmer for 2-2.5 hours, occasionally giving it a stir. The longer you cook it, the more depth of flavor the chili will have. Oddly enough, freezing and reheating this chili is recommended, although, time constraints may not allow for it.

(Yes, there is a secret ingredient here, one that I will not share with you specifically. But, as to not leave you totally in the dark, it is an expensive chili powder that I throw in approximately 15 minutes before I serve.)

Garnish with onions and shredded cheese and voila, you have one tasty treat for your Super Bowl party.

Again, let me add, cooking chili is not difficult, but it is an art. An art that takes time, patience and a certain, je ne sais quoi. Let me know how it goes!

The post Andy Isaac’s Famous Chili Recipe In Honor Of Our Friend appeared first on BroBible.

While sharks seem to have monopolized our fear of the deep sea, there are plenty of other dangerous animals that strike more often than they do.

In fact, you’re more likely to die from a falling coconut than you are from a shark attack, but here’s a look at some other ocean dwellers that are more likely to make an appearance this summer.

Portuguese Man O’ War

There has been an influx of these mesmerizing creatures on the East Coast this year. With reported sightings in Long Island and Martha’s Vineyard, the Portuguese Man O’ War has caused its share of beach closings.

Fatalities have also been reported, but the fear of encountering one of these alien creatures is because of the excruciating pain their tentacles inflict and the permanent scarring they cause.

Fire Coral

While not deadly, fire coral can be a real nuisance to Pacific Ocean surfers. Fire coral looks like ordinary coral, but is actually an animal with invisible tentacles. Contact with the tentacles can cause minor skin irritation, or in the worst cases, extreme nausea and dizziness.

Box Jellyfish

Considered to be the most venomous sea creature, the box jellyfish can cause death with minimal contact.

According to Jean-Philippe Soule from Native Planet, there have been 70 reported deaths caused by the box jellyfish—and even when death does not occur, the pain can be paralyzing.

Barracuda

While you are more likely to be bitten by a barracuda than a shark, the chances of death from a barracuda bite are almost nonexistent. The fear factor with these fish really comes as the result of their aggressive nature.

These predator fish have very sharp teeth and very small mouths and attack with crazy ferociousness. Christen Conger from Animal Planet also notes that “unlike sharks that hunt by scent, barracudas spot prey with their bulging eyes, making it easier to spy swimmers’ dangling legs.”­

Stone Fish

The world’s most venomous fish, the stone fish lies on the ocean floor with perfect camouflage; while the stone fish is only dangerous if stepped on or caught, it is nearly impossible to distinguish from a regular rock.

A stone fish sting can be quite deadly, but even with treatment amputation is often required.

Blue-Ringed Octopus

These very tiny creatures (2 to 20 cm) are covered in blue ringlets and their color changes with their mood. But the beauty of these octopi shouldn’t fool you, they’re deadly.

Here’s what Jean-Phillipe Soule from Native Planet has to say about them:

“The bite might be painless, but this octopus injects a neuromuscular paralyzing venom. The venom contains some maculotoxin, a poison more violent than any found on land animals.

The nerve conduction is blocked and neuromuscular paralysis is followed by death. The victim might be saved if artificial respiration starts before marked cyanosis and hypotension develops.”

Fun!

The post 6 Sea Creatures You Should Be More Afraid Of Than Sharks appeared first on BroBible.

Hot sauce has been the fastest-growing condiment in the U.S. for over a decade. Don’t just stick to Sriracha and Cholula though, make your own. Not only can you control the heat, but you can also add whiskey!

It’s been over a week since I made something with booze in it so I wanted to make amends. All three Guyism Grill posts this week will be booze-laden condiments. For once you can have more than just a one-night stand with the recipes you discovered here! Make them once and use them repeatedly.

Anyway, let’s get to the main attraction

How To Make Whiskey Hot Sauce

When you use whiskey as an ingredient in a dish, it’s usually best to follow the same rule most people follow when you’re cooking with wine: always cook with something you drink on its own without breaking the bank.

Much like you wouldn’t throw a 1986 Chateau Mouton Rothschild into a stew, you’re not going to want to use Pappy Van Winkle as a base for a whiskey hot sauce. I had a bottle of Jim Beam lying around, and while that’s the kind of quality and price point you probably want to shoot for, there are plenty of similar options you can employ (and even experiment with if you want to compare different brands).

As far as peppers go, I went with habaneros because I’m a badass (that’s completely untrue. I’m just trying to boost my heat tolerance). Feel free to use the peppers that match your level of spice appreciation.

It turns out that making hot sauce really isn’t all that difficult. Chop up some peppers, carrots, and onions then simmer. Throw in a few more ingredients(including the whiskey) and simmer some more. All that’s left to do is throw it in the blender.

It really doesn’t get much easier than that.

The toughest part about the process is not getting the peppers on your hands because you’re going to have a bad day if you do. Pretty much anything you touch will burn. I don’t keep gloves around the house so I used two Ziplock bags.

This recipe came from superwoman Georgia Pellegrini. I swapped the Serrano peppers for habanero, used Jacob’s Ghost, and stuck with molasses instead of brown sugar. Other than that we’re two peas in a chili pod.

Ingredients:

• 2 tablespoons cider vinegar (I put the wrong one in the picture)
• 1/4 cup Habanero peppers, some seeds removed (based on heat preference) and diced
• 2 tablespoons chipotle peppers in adobo sauce, roughly chopped
• 1/2 cup onion, finely diced
• 1/2 cup carrot, peeled and finely diced
• 1/4 cup whiskey
• Juice of 1 lemon
• 1/2 cup molasses
• 1/4 teaspoon ground cumin
• 1 tablespoon salt

Instructions:

1. Don’t get habanero oil on your fingers while chopping.
2. DON’T GET HABANERO OIL ON YOUR FINGERS WHILE CHOPPING.
3. In a saucepan, bring cider vinegar and 1 cup of water to a boil.
4. Add the diced peppers, Chipotle peppers, onion, and carrot. Let them simmer over low heat, covered, for 15-20 minutes to soften.
5. Add the remaining ingredients to the saucepan, stir and return to a simmer for 3-5 minutes.
6. Puree in a blender or food processor.
7. Transfer to a glass jar and let cool.
8. Store in the refrigerator for up to one year.

Oh, and finally: Enjoy.

The post How To Make The Best Whiskey Hot Sauce At Home appeared first on BroBible.

• Intelligence can be a gift and a curse, as plenty of so-called “geniuses” have trouble with certain tasks and concepts that many people would view as straightforward
• Here are some of the seemingly simple things that can actually be a massive headache for people with a big brain
• Read more about intelligence here

The Notorious B.I.G. famously outlined the correlation between wealth and misery on “Mo Money Mo Problems,” the posthumous song that was released in the wake of the death of the man who sadly served as the ultimate cautionary tale when it came to highlighting the issue he was addressing on the track.

The rapper was just one of many people who’ve been forced to grapple with the pitfalls that frequently accompany the kind of financial windfalls that prove it’s possible to have too much of a good thing. However, there are plenty of other assets that tend to be accompanied by downsides most people would never even take into consideration.

That’s especially true when it comes to intelligence. Being a certified brainiac might seem like a pretty sweet gig at first glance, but when you take a look at how often “tortured” tends to precede the word “genius” when it comes to describing many of history’s most famous minds, it becomes pretty clear there can be a bit of a dark side.

Of course, plenty of exceptionally smart people are able to figure out a way to avoid being consumed by their own brilliance. However, that doesn’t mean it’s always a walk in the park—especially when it comes to dealing with these supposedly “simple” things that a lot of geniuses end up struggling with.

7. School

This is easily the one entry on this list that unites geniuses and the rest of the population more than anything else.

After all, it’s virtually impossible for anyone to devote the formative years of their life working their way through the compulsory education ranks without encountering at least a few issues along the way—including geniuses. There are plenty of relatable cases concerning notable thinkers who struggled with a specific subject, but there’s also a bigger picture issue you might have a harder time sympathizing with: sheer boredom.

Most classrooms operate on the assumption that every student is on a fairly even playing field, which can be detrimental to outliers on both ends of the spectrum. It’s easy to understand why more time and effort is devoted to students who struggle with the basics, but it’s also easy to understand why an elementary schooler capable of acing a high school class might grow bored, restless, and disillusioned when they’re forced to spend all day listening to their teacher repeatedly attempt to hammer home a concept they were able to grasp as a four-year-old.

If it sounds like a nightmare, that’s because it is.

6. Playing By The Rules

We naturally live our lives by a commonly accepted set of rules. They’re not even things we think about. We just follow them because, well, that’s just the way it is and it’s easier that way.

If you’ve ever met a genius then, you know that they think about everything and that means that they inevitably question a lot of the things most people take for granted. The result is that it’s hard for them to live within the same social constructs as the rest of us. It simply doesn’t make sense to them

In many cases, they end up resenting the fact that they’re expected to in the first place, which can only make the problem worse and result in them acting out or bucking convention to prove a point (which is why your weird cousin with an IQ of 165 IQ wore shorts to your wedding).

5. Meeting People

A number of studies have shown that there is a fairly strong correlation between genius and social and behavioral disorders like autism (which also serves as the foundation for a well-established and incredibly tired Hollywood trope).

Whether this is a pure accident of chemistry or whether it’s due to our own biases of what’s “normal,” the end result is that a lot of geniuses have trouble dealing with people—especially when it involves meeting new ones.

Now I’m not talking some clichéd foot-in-mouth nonsense where the genius just wants to talk in Klingon all day. What I’m talking about is a genuine inability to even initiate contact with another human being.

My theory is that geniuses have an internal monologue (n other words, they spend way too much time thinking) that ends up paralyzing them That makes it really easy to psyche yourself out and when that happens suddenly meeting people for them is as difficult as rocket science is for the rest of the world.

4. Small Talk

Even if they do manage to meet people without much of a problem, it’s hard for many geniuses to get any further than that because they suck at making small talk.

You probably don’t realize it, but a huge chunk of your daily interaction with people involves meaningless banter that you just participate in without really thinking about it. Now, you might know there’s nothing more cliché than talking about the weather during a cursory interaction with a stranger, but that’s not going to stop you from doing it anyway because it makes life a little easier for everyone. It’s easy and it’s comfortable and you don’t have to think twice about it.

Therein lies the issues: geniuses love to think twice about it—and then they like to think about it a third time and then a fourth time and then… you get the point. When you spend so much time focusing on the idiotic and meaningless topics and phrases that we all use to get by, it’s hard not to see them as completely ridiculous.

Geniuses suck at making small talk because they simply can’t see the point. Small talk is lubrication for social convention,  and as we’ve already seen, geniuses don’t care much for social convention.

3. Working A Typical Job

It’s kind of hard to land a decent job when you have no idea how to talk to people on their level, no matter how smart you are.

A lot of geniuses can’t even make it through the interview process because they refuse to play along with the games we all accept as part of that whole deal. They’ll answer honestly and often brutally and hey, guess what? People don’t really like that.

If they do get a decent job, there’s still the whole “playing nice with others” thing, which is kind of hard to do when you think everyone’s an idiot. After all, a person on the low end of the genius scale has a 140 IQ, which is 40 points higher than average. Imagine going to work every day and trying to deal with people with 60 IQs. You’d go nuts, right?

Well, that’s what it’s like for geniuses. To them, all their coworkers and their bosses are Forrest Gump.

2. Adjusting To A World Defined By Structure

When you spend so much time questioning the rules of society, it tends to have a domino effect on the rest of your life. Suddenly, you can’t understand why you need to arbitrarily be at the office from nine to five—especially when you’re so smart that you can probably get your work done in less than an hour.

Next, you wonder why you should go to sleep just because the sun goes down. Studies have shown that geniuses are statistically more likely to be night owls, which some people have theorized could have been exacerbated by the introduction of electricity.

The rationale is that geniuses have long understood the so-called “need” to sleep when the sun goes down and wake when it comes up—inherent in humanity for millennia—was an inherently flawed belief that was potentially detrimental to progress on the individual and societal level, which led to them rejecting traditional sleeping patterns and biorhythms.

In short: their bodies literally change to accommodate these intuitive leaps that the rest of us simply don’t make (either that or they’re on uppers).

1.  Not Driving Themselves To The Brink Of Insanity

Take everything else on this list—the inability to play by rules, the high incidence of mental instability and behavioral disorder, the social alienation and inability to fit into the world’s standards for normality—and it becomes easy to see why so many things in everyday life are a surprising struggle for a lot of geniuses.

There’s a reason the phrase “there’s a fine line between genius and insanity” has managed to stand the test of time. It’s got to drive geniuses completely insane to have to live in a world designed by people who fail to realize what seems so obvious to them. The idea of the “tortured genius” makes much more sense when you realize being subjected to that kind of daily existence could literally be torture if you’re forced to endure it for long enough.

So, yeah. Be careful what you wish for.

The post 7 Simple Things Geniuses Struggle With On A Regular Basis appeared first on BroBible.

Shredded, sliced, chopped, or pulled, North Carolina BBQ is all about smoked pork with a thin, spice- and vinegar-based sauce.

It should be noted, however, that Eastern NC favors a whole hog BBQ with the vinegar sauce, while Western NC favors pork shoulder with a vinegary sauce that may sometimes include tomato.

South Carolina Style BBQ

Once more, we’re gonna breakdown this state into a few regional styles:

Western South Carolina BBQ uses a variety of meats with a ketchup and pepper-based sauce.

Mid-South Carolina barbecued meats are slathered with “Carolina Gold” sauce, made from mustard, vinegar, brown sugar and other spices.

Eastern South Carolina features the “whole hog” method, which is served with a thin, peppery vinegar sauce.

Alabama Style BBQ

While you can find a bevy of different sauces and influences around this surrounded-by-other-BBQ-states-state, you’ll likely find one style that is celebrated throughout: smoked chicken and pork shoulder squirted with a healthy dose of white sauce.

White barbecue sauce? Yessirma’amsir. White barbecue sauce is typically made with mayonnaise, apple cider vinegar, lemon juice, pepper, and salt, and those Alabamamanians (or however it is said) absolutely love it.

Memphis Style BBQ

Memphis barbecue is typically comprised of pork ribs or chopped pork (you can get ’em ‘wet’ with sauce or more commonly, ‘dry’ with a spice rub) as a platter, on a bun or even on pizza or nachos.

Virginia Style BBQ

The little-known Virginia-style barbecue uses meats such as Virginia ham, chicken, or wild game. Sauces are often tomato-based with flavor accents provided by vinegar, bourbon and, peppers.

Kentucky Style BBQ

Kentucky style can actually be broken into two sub-categories: Western and South Central.

In the West, a typical dish is smoked mutton shoulder with a Worcestershire-based sauce.

In the South Central area, smoked pork shoulder is often sliced thin, then sauced with a zesty blend of vinegar and peppers, and served over white bread.

St. Louis Style BBQ

St. Louis-style barbecue is a pork lover’s dream; pulled pork, pork steak, and crispy pork snoots (flavorful snout and cheek meat) are popular dishes here.

Kansas City Style BBQ

If you’ve ever tasted K.C. Masterpiece, you probably wouldn’t be too surprised that Kansas City-style barbecue is all about the thick and sweet tomato- and molasses-based sauce. All barbecue meats are equally celebrated in KC.

Texas Style BBQ

This is another barbecue Mecca that’s broken down into a few sub-styles:

Eastern Texas barbecue is one of the most popular types of southern barbecue. Beef brisket or pork is often chopped instead of sliced and served with spicy BBQ sauce or hot sauce.

Central Texas barbecue is a meat lover’s paradise, where protein always takes the center stage while sides and sauces are secondary. Central Texas is known for its smoked sliced brisket, ribs, and sausage.

West Texas barbecue makes use of goat, mutton, and beef, directly cooked over mesquite.

South Texas is known for barbacoa – a rich, succulent mess o’ meat from the cow’s head that originated in either the Caribbean or Mexico depending on who you ask.

Oklahoma Style BBQ

OK BBQ is a hybrid style, meaning you could find yourself with Kansas City-style sauce or a Memphis style rub, and a wide range of meat selections including smoked beef brisket, ribs, chicken, sausage, turkey and even bologna sausage.

Santa Maria/California Style BBQ

This is a somewhat under-the-radar barbecue style in most parts of the country, but it’s also the obsession in Santa Maria and other parts of California. Beef tri-tip (a cut that comes from the bottom sirloin subprimal cut) is seasoned with salt, pepper, and garlic salt before grilling, slicing, and serving.

Hawaiian Style BBQ

Hawaiian barbecue is sort of just what you get when cooking whole-hog style in a hot underground pit. This Polynesian tradition doesn’t extend much more beyond this, and so it only barely registers as an American barbecue tradition. Still, if you’re in Hawaii, you shouldn’t miss out on some smoky delicious luau pork.

The post All You Need To Know About America’s Many Regional BBQ Styles appeared first on BroBible.

• Getting someone to say “Yes” when you need them to do something for you can be a pain, but it doesn’t have to be that way
• Here are some proven ways to get someone to agree to help you out
• Check out more life hacks here

The ability to get people to say “Yes” is a skill few people have mastered. It’s important in several aspects of life— from business to relationships to everyday interactions —and unlocking the power of getting people to say “yes” can open doors usually locked shut.

There is a fine line between getting people to agree and tricking them into agreeing to your wishes. Anyone can nag a person into a yes or (trick) an individual into agreeing or even strong-arm until they see things differently.

So how does a person master the art of yes without coming off as Tony Robbins-type weird or super aggressive to the point of confrontational? Here are three methods that feel kind of sneaky but have proven effective in getting others to say yes.

The “But You Are Free” Method

According to a piece in Fast Company, a review of 42 psychology studies (on 22,000 people) suggests that the “But You Are Free Method” technique could double the chances someone would say “yes” to you.

The idea is simple: make a request of a person but acknowledge that the decision is ultimately their choice to make. You’re persuading the individual to make a choice while not threatening their right to say no. Some examples are saying  “I’m going out for drinks after work, you’re welcome to join me if you’re not busy” to your attractive co-worker or “I’m collecting money for charity, if you’d like to donate, that would be great” to that guy that never gives anything to the office charity drives.

The best part is there really is no correct way to say “but it’s totally up to you” because it really is totally up to you but studies have shown the method is much more effective in face-to-face interactions.

The “Aim Lower” Method

The basic idea is that if you’re met with a no, ask again, but make the request much smaller than the first. If possible, do something for the person which looks like a favor, and the chances they say yes are even greater. The actual term is reciprocity or responding to a positive action with another positive action.

This piece has a great example of the idea working in real life. Let’s go back to the uncharitable coworker example. Approach the coworker and ask for a monetary donation. Let’s make it $20 for this example. If you’re met with a no, offer something to them, in return for a smaller donation. “How about this — if you donate $10 to the charity drive, I’ll do whatever dumb task you hate doing around the office today.”

Obviously, have the task in mind first. Since you’re willing to do something for them, they might be willing to be a little looser with their money. But seriously, what’s this dude issues? Who can’t at least give a buck to charity?!?

Another tricky tactic to get a yes is to ask for something absurd while having an actual goal in mind. In other words, if you want the office tightwad to donate $20 bucks, ask him for $50 first, then come down to $20 and an offer of light manual labor.

The “But All Your Friends Are Doing It” Method

Remember when your mom would ask “if everyone jumped off the bridge, would you?” and you wanted to say yes because they were your friends and you did all the same dumb things they did? That’s the basic principle behind the “Buy All Your Friends Are Doing It” method of getting people to say yes.

There is nothing wrong with a little peer pressure to gain an advantage.  For example, in this article, the author explains that “customers are more likely to buy when they know that people “just like them” are also buying. That’s why TV infomercials always feature interviews with happy buyers in the target audience.”

If a person feels that everyone else is saying yes, they’d be left out if they’d didn’t agree to the same thing. Now, the hardest part is getting those OTHER people to say yes first. Well, you could fudge that part a little.

The post Here Are 3 Proven Ways To Get Someone To Say ‘Yes’ When You Need Their Help appeared first on BroBible.

• The world is home to plenty of insane food challenges designed to push people to their limit
• Here are some of the craziest feats offered by restaurants and others you can whip up at home—and the best strategies for coming out on top
• Check out more stuff about food here

Crazy food challenges are commonplace in countless restaurants across the nation.

Restaurant owners challenge patrons to gorge on excessive amounts of food with the promise of rewards if emerging victorious. Finish the meal and prizes like cash, the entire check on the house or a picture on the wall await the “winner.”

Decades ago, the idea of hosting a contest pitting man against morsel tasked with devouring pounds of food for bragging rights would seem downright barbaric. “You’re going to eat 72 ounces of steak? On purpose? To get your photo on a wall?”

The eagerness to defeat food is the new American pastime and crazy food challenges have become the norm.  With common folks sitting down to eating challenges every day, we felt it our obligation to arm them with the knowledge needed to tackle the craziest food challenges and come out plump but victorious. We’re not suggesting you try any of these crazy food challenges, but if you do, at least you’ll be prepared.

Here’s a list of the nine hardest food challenges and a few tips on how to beat them.

The 72-Ounce Steak Challenge

If you think you’ve got the guts, you can head to the Lone Star State to try to consume The Big Texan 72-ounce steak along with a buttered bread roll, shrimp cocktail, a baked potato, ranch beans, and a side salad and the meal is free. They’ll even wheel you out to your car when you’re finished.

HOW TO BEAT IT: The trick to consuming steak, especially a 72-ounce slab of beef, is to cut the massive meat into smaller-than-bite-sized pieces. Also, be sure to eat in order: meat first and carbs (baked potato, roll, and beans) last.

The 15 Dozen Club Challenge

Sit down at the Acme Oyster House in New Orleans, Louisiana for this crazy food challenge. All competitors need to do is consume 180 oysters in one sitting. If you’re gunning for number 1, the record holder at Acme Oyster at 645 in one meal. The winner gets a comped meal and a free t-shirt.

HOW TO BEAT IT: The great thing about oysters is they come with their own handy beverage to aid in getting a ton down the throat. Don’t bother with a drink (water is best) and just start shoveling oysters into your mouth. If they’re a smaller size, maybe even skip the chewing to save on time.

The Inferno Bowl Challenge

The Inferno Bowl Challenge sounds like one of the most uninteresting of all the BCS bowl games but this crazy food challenge WILL keep you on a different type of bowl for a while. This 48-ounce soup is made from bhut jolokia, known as the ghost chili and one of the spiciest peppers on the planet. Contestants have just a half-hour to down the whole thing. The winner walks away with a grand.

HOW TO BEAT IT: Most competitive eaters will tell people that when it comes to spicy food challenges, the smartest thing to do is just eat. Get through the challenge as fast as possible and find the quickest relief — usually milk or other fat and thick drinks — and try to get your mind off the task at hand. Ask to listen to headphones or watch a TV in proximity to get your mind off the challenge and the pain. Or concentrate on the possibility of walking away with $1K.

The 7-Pound Italian Challenge

This one comes courtesy of Mick and Angelo’s, a (you guessed it) Italian restaurant located on the Canadian side of Niagara Falls.

Contestants have an hour and half minutes to devour almost every classic Italian dish grandma could create: spaghetti, grilled sausage, lasagna, chicken parmesan, cheese manicotti, cannelloni, garlic bread, vegetable soup, and an apple crisp for dessert. This crazy food challenge has only one rule to win a T-shirt, a comped meal, and your photo on the wall of fame — you’re not allowed to leave the table until you’ve cleaned your plate.

HOW TO BEAT IT: Much like the steak challenge, try and eat the meat first and carbs last. Since most of the meal is carbs, try and get the milk-based and heavier foods out of the way.

The Pointersaurus Challenge

The Pointersaurus from Pointer’s Pizza in St. Louis, Missouri involves a 28-inch, ten-pound, two-meat-topping (or four if you’re a vegetarian and only want veggies on the pie) pizza, and a $500 reward.

Unlike the other competitions, this crazy food challenge allows for two contestants to tackle the massive pizza pie.

HOW TO BEAT IT: Divide and conquer but each person should follow this strategy — eat the entire inside of the pizza first (cheese, sauce, and whatever toppings) and save the crusts for last. The interior makes up a huge portion of the pizza so get it over with early.

The Kitchen Sink Challenge

The San Francisco Creamery is home to the Kitchen Sink Challenge, which consists of: three sliced bananas, eight scoops of ice creams (contestants’ choice), eight servings of toppings, mounds of whipped cream, chopped toasted almonds, and cherries.

Eat everything in the kitchen sink and get free ice cream for a year.

HOW TO BEAT IT: Using a warm or hot liquid (coffee or tea) to aid in faster consumption.  Try stirring the ice cream up so it’s not as hard, or hard to consume.

The Peeps Challenge

This one doesn’t require you to make the trek to an actual restaurant. All you have to do is stock up on the marshmallow treats known as Peeps and see how many you can house in five minutes (if you’re trying to break the record, you’re going to need to stock up the record, as the record currently sits at 255 courtesy of competitive eating legend Matt Stonie).

HOW TO BEAT IT: Water. Drink after every mouthful of Peep. The water will help dissolve the sugar and aid in chewing and swallowing.

The One-Gallon Challenge

This one is another one you can do on your own (just like countless teenagers with nothing better to do have done over the years). The gallon challenge is simple: one hour to chug a gallon of whole milk without throwing up. Milk does a body good but probably not in such large quantities.

HOW TO BEAT IT: First let’s say that drinking a gallon of anything in an hour can be hazardous. The best way to beat it is to not attempt it in the first place, but if you must, attempt it on an empty stomach, and don’t attempt it all in one massive chug.

The post The Craziest Food Challenges In The World—And How To Beat Them appeared first on BroBible.

• A bar crawl can be a great time, but it can also become the ultimate test of your endurance
• Follow these tips and tricks to ensure you make it all the way to the end
• Read more about drinking here

Bar crawls are almost always a good time. You get to hang out with good friends, you get to meet a lot of new people and hey, you get to get drunk, which let’s face it helps to make anything a good time.

The only problem is that a bar crawl can turn into a logistical nightmare, with people getting lost, separated from their friends, chasing each other down all night and wandering all alone, drunk in the middle of the street like a hobo.

Well, we’re here to make sure none of that happens with these nine tips for surviving a bar crawl. You’re welcome, America. You’re welcome.

9. Have a Plan

You don’t have to be Martha Stewart with OCD here, but it’s a good idea to have a general game plan. Know which bars you plan to hit and at least have a vague order of how you’re going to hit them. That way, if things start to unravel along the way, everybody in your group will at least have a general idea of where to go to try to get things back on track.

Of course, even the best game plans fall apart at the bottom of a bottle, so it might be a good idea to have one of your friends serve as a sort of designated babysitter; someone who’s okay with hanging out all night and having fun without getting wasted and won’t mind keeping the rest of you from wandering off alone and being hauled in by the cops after they find you missing your pants and incoherently harassing the sandwich makers at Subway.

8. Pace Yourself

This one is very important. You don’t want to be the guy who blows his wad at the very first stop and gets too drunk to continue.

That’s no fun for anyone. Your friends either have to decide to stay behind with you, which ruins their night, or leave you in the care of an annoyed bartender who will probably spend all night fantasizing about smashing a bottle upside your head and then dumping your body in the dumpster in the alley out back.

Sure, doing a line of tequila shooters might sound like a fun way to start off the night, but this is a marathon, not a sprint and you don’t want to be the dude cramping up before the end of the first mile, do you?

7. Don’t Get Bogged Down

The best way to pace yourself is to make sure you don’t get bogged down in one bar for too long. You don’t want to park yourself on a stool—or worse, in a booth—because pretty soon you won’t want to get up. You’ll just want to sit there and drink.

The thing about that is that it’s hard to gauge how drunk you really are without moving around a lot. Just remember that you’re there to get experience lots of different bars, not just one. Look at it like casual dating. You’re just looking for a good time, not trying to get married.

6. Don’t Be in a Rush

You don’t want to get bogged down, but perhaps even more importantly, you don’t want to be in such a hurry to get to the next bar that you don’t take the time to relax a bit and enjoy the one you’re already in. That’s a surefire way to kill a bar crawl.

It’s a delicate balancing act. You want to experience as many bars as possible, but you want to actually experience them, not feel like a tourist on some walking tour of the city’s pubs. It’s important to be in the moment while maintaining an agenda for the rest of the night in the back of your head.

5. Have an Exit Strategy

Before each bar, talk about the general plan. Figure out how long you want to stay, how much you want to drink, and maybe even coordinate some signals that you can shoot each other across a crowded room to let each other know that it’s time to move on.

Again, though, it’s a balancing act. You don’t want to be too specific or else you’ll just spend the whole time staring at your watch. That’s too rigid and nobody will have any fun. Leave some wiggle room so that you can get a feel for each place; some will be better than others, and you’ll want to stay longer in some places—that way, if you find someone cool you want to get to know better, you can manage that without feeling like you’re speed dating.

So have an exit strategy before you go in, but keep it loose.

4. Give Your Friends Their Space

A common mistake in a bar crawl is running around in one big herd. You look like a gang of tourists or scared gazelles huddling together for protection.

At best, you’ll look standoffish and no one will feel comfortable intruding on your group. At worst, you’ll look like a bunch of dorks.

Spread out, talk to new people, and don’t worry too much if one of your friends gets bored and splits early for the next place. That’s what the game plan is for. Again, don’t be afraid to be in the moment.

3. Don’t Get Too Separated

As important as giving each other space is, the worst thing you can do in a bar crawl is to get too separated. Once this happens, the whole night becomes a frustrating exercise in phone tag and hide and seek.

Give each other space to do your own thing, but keep one eye out for each other too. This is where signals come into play and a game plan and exit strategy become vitally important.

A good idea is to never let yourself become separated by more than one bar at a time. So if you do see a friend split early for the next place, you don’t have to rush out after him but remind yourself to wrap things up at the current place sooner rather than later.

2. Don’t Mix

This is a general rule of thumb whenever you’re drinking but it’s especially applicable in a bar crawl, where different bars have different specialties and different deals. Do not mix beer with liquor. Just don’t do it.

Unless, of course, you plan on the world ending before you have to wake up the next morning. But even before then, mixing can have disastrous consequences. If you start off mixing, chances are you’ll be vomiting in the street before you even get to the last place on your crawl.

1. Enjoy Yourself

Everything that’s already been said takes a backseat to this one golden rule. Enjoy yourself. Everything else should be in service to that one thing.

All these other tips exist just to make sure that you get the maximum amount of enjoyment out of your crawl, and the moment any of them start to seem like work, it’s time to take a step back, relax and allow yourself to have fun.

Do not make this harder than it has to be. Just use common sense, keep these helpful hints in the back of your mind, remind yourself to have fun and you’ll be fine.

The post Everything You Need To Know To Survive A Bar Crawl appeared first on BroBible.

• Bench dips are one of the most popular tricep exercises, but they can inflict some major damage on your shoulders
• Here are some alternatives you can incorporate into your workout
• Check out more fitness tips here

Every guy loves training arms because big arms make a statement. But a mistake some guys make trying to get bigger arms is only focusing on training their biceps. They will hit every bicep exercise ever created every time they step into the gym, but they’ll be blown out at the end of the workout and will only hit the triceps as an afterthought.

That’s actually a big mistake, as it ignores the fact that the triceps make up the majority of the mass of the upper arms.

If you want to make it rain with unlimited tickets to the gun show, you have to add mass to your triceps and make them a priority in your arm workouts. The key is finding the exercises that are effective without sacrificing the health of your joints.

Enter one of the worst exercises you can do for building up your triceps: bench dips.

Why You Should Avoid Bench Dips

You have definitely seen someone hitting this horrific shoulder-snapping exercise in the gym.  They probably had a stack of plates on their lap and were screaming through every rep.

Bench dips are performed with your hands on a flat bench and feet elevated on another bench or box.

As you drop down into the bottom of the movement, the front of your shoulders will be driven forward which causes a massive amount of stress and strain on the front of your shoulders (look at Arnold’s shoulders in the above picture).  This is a big problem for guys who have preexisting shoulder issues or a current shoulder injury.

The lower you go and the more weight you use, the more you will strain your shoulders. Bench dips have a very high risk vs. reward ratio.

To keep your shoulders healthy and build mass on your triceps, switch out bench dips for close grip bench presses.

The Benefits Of Close Grip Bench Presses

Close grip bench presses are a serious mass builder for the triceps, and because of the grip width on the bar (narrower than when performing a regular bench press), they are a safer option for guys who want to add size to their triceps.

To get the most out of the exercise, close grip bench presses should be performed with a combination of heavy and moderate weights and a variety of rep ranges.

A common mistake some guys make is placing their hands too close together – their whole hand on the smooth part on the inside of the bar – which can cause stress and strain on the elbows.

I typically recommend taking a grip-width where the pointer fingers are right outside of the smooth part on the inside of the bar.  This will place the hand slightly narrower than shoulder width and allow heavier weights to be used.

It is important if you want to grow your arms to start making tricep training a focus in your workouts.  Simply switching the order of your biceps and triceps exercises – and performing your tricep work first – or crushing some high volume supplemental tricep exercises after your chest workout, can be the jumpstart you need to finally start adding muscle.

And just because you’ve seen guys hitting a certain exercise in the gym, doesn’t mean it is a good exercise. It just means that they’ve seen others do it and they think it will work for them.  Pick exercises that match your goals, allow you to train hard, and don’t put you at risk for injuries down the road.

The post Why Bench Dips Are Bad For Your Shoulders (And What To Replace Them With) appeared first on BroBible.

• There’s a good chance you’ve been opening cases of beer the wrong way for a long time
• This deceptively simple trick is guaranteed to make life a lot easier
• Read more about beer here

If you’re like most people who started drinking beer before you were old enough to legally purchase it, then you’re likely very well-acquainted with at least a few of the cheap, mass-produced lagers that have long served as the beverage of choice (or, if we’re being accurate, necessity) for people in high school and college.

It’s not too hard to figure out why the light beers produced by the likes of Keystone, Natty, and Busch have always been popular with younger drinkers who prioritize quantity over quality and are looking for the biggest bang for their buck. Sure, they might not be the tastiest beers in the world, but there will always be a time and a place for them.

The unremarkable nature of those beers (and the equally unremarkable nature of the ingredients used to make them) is obviously a huge factor when it comes to explaining why they tend to be relatively inexpensive. However, the fact that they’re usually sold in larger quantities also plays a role; if you’ve ever pulled out your phone at the liquor store to calculate which options offer the most booze for the lowest price, you probably know 24-packs and 30s tend to boast the best value.

However, buying in bulk does come with some downsides—especially when it comes to trying to transport a case after opening it.

A lot of cases of beer feature a built-in handle that can come in handy when you’re bringing your purchase to your car or carrying it to a party. However, thanks to the nature of the spherical cans contained within, it becomes virtually worthless as soon as you open up the flaps on the end; if you need to carry the box once those floodgates are open, you’re basically forced to use both hands (and if you’re trying to carry it to the fridge, you now only have one option when it comes to storing it).

Thankfully, there’s a deceptively simple solution you can deploy to solve this issue that many people overlook because it forces you to defy common sense: tearing off the handle.

As we’ve already established, the handle no longer serves a purpose once you crack open the case. By removing it to create a slot at the top, you’re essentially creating a beer version of a tissue box that gives you easy access to the contents inside. This will also provide you with a bit more flexibility when it comes to moving the case thanks to the structural integrity that’s retained by keeping the sides intact (it’s way easier to simply tuck it under one of your arms compared to the alternative).

Feel free to thank us later.

The post This Lifehack Is The Best Way To Open A Case Of Beer appeared first on BroBible.

• There is no shortage of alcoholic drinks you can pick from, but a few of them are more dangerous than others
• Here’s a list of the adult beverages with the potential to ruin your night more than any others
• Read more drinking stores here

Man is a naturally inquisitive creature—an explorer of the fringes of possibility if you will—so it makes sense that when it comes to getting drunk, man has a habit of developing increasingly more potent ways to make that happen.

After all, no matter what anyone says about various national pastimes, the one true worldwide pastime isn’t baseball or soccer, but getting completely and totally bombed. But, as it was with the atomic bomb, man’s insatiable quest for the biggest and the baddest has created a plethora of drinks of mass destruction, drinks that will destroy your liver and cause all your unborn babies to be born mutants.

Yes, in all his curiosity and lack of wisdom, man has created these, seven of the most dangerous drinks in the world (and pour one out for the boozy energy drink that was O.G. Four Loko as well as Bacardi 151, both of which would’ve made this list if they hadn’t incited a moral panic by flying too close to the sun).

7. Tokyo Iced Tea

The Long Island Iced Tea is an alcoholic beverage that’s extremely popular amongst college kids who want to get bombed without having to actually go through all the wincing and dry-heaving that comes with forcing shots down your throat. It works because you’re basically drinking a pint glass of hard liquor—typically vodka, gin, tequila, light rum (and/or dark rum), and triple sec—that’s topped with cola, sour mix, or actual iced tea (depending on how you make it).

The Tokyo Iced Tea, though, says to hell with your pansy non-alcoholic mixes and substitutes the delightful Midori, which due to its fruity taste still lets the drink go down smooth, only with the added complication of alcohol poisoning.

Add it all together, and one Tokyo Iced Tea can be the equivalent of eight or nines shots of liquor that you can barely even taste.

Just drink it in the back of an ambulance. It will be easier that way.

6. The Four Horsemen

You may be familiar with the Three Wise Men, which combines a shot of Johnnie Walker, a shot of Jim Beam, and a shot of Jack Daniel’s into one drunkard’s paradise of a drink.

However, what if the Three Wise Men abandoned their gifts for the baby Jesus and opted to turn to apocalyptic terror when their friend Jose Cuervo decides to stop by and add some tequila into the mix?

At that point, the Four Horsemen ride all over your liver, bringing pestilence and death and blackouts. This is what happens when you let three nice, sweet, impressionable boys from Tennessee hang out with a bandito.

5. Liquid Cocaine

The fact that this cocktail is called “Liquid Cocaine” should make it very obvious it’s not messing around.

You start with some high-proof rum—which means you’re already in trouble—and then add some Goldschlager before mixing that together with your good friend Jagermeister.

Just reading that should be enough to make you stumble headfirst through a plate glass window, and actually drinking it will cause the plate glass window to actually gain sentience and then fall through you.

4. Headhunter

The Headhunter just overwhelms you with sheer numbers. It’s not particularly fancy; it’s just brutally effective.

At its heart, the Headhunter contains about four ounces of spiced rum, which is enough for Captain Morgan to pirate your sobriety, but then the good Captain completely loses control of the action when his crew mutinies to the tune of three more ounces of overproof rum.

By this point, your sobriety ship is completely in flames and there are people puking off of the decks. And then just for the hell of it, four more ounces of beer come along just to hang out and dance in the ashes.

3. Moonshine

Anytime there’s a chance that what you’re drinking will cause you to go blind, it’s gonna end up on this list.

Moonshine is dangerous because nobody but the redneck who distilled it in his barn or in his bathtub knows what really went into it; you could be drinking turpentine mixed with drain cleaner. You just don’t know.

Sure, Farmer Fred might swear to you that this will get you messed up, but by that he probably means that you’ll end up flat on your back in a hospital bed or on a slab in the morgue—especially since his wife just came storming out of the house screaming at him about where all her nail-polish remover and Clorox went.

2. New Orleans Hand Grenade

The New Orleans Hand Grenade doesn’t seem that different from dozens of other strong cocktails – it has shots of vodka, gin, rum, and melon liqueur, which will get you drunk, but isn’t particularly dangerous.

However, what sets the New Orleans Hand Grenade apart is that its final ingredient is listed simply as “grain alcohol.”

Bad things start happening when you start dealing with grain alcohol. At that point, you’re pretty much drinking pure ethanol. Just check out the many uses of ethanol if you want to understand why this is so ridiculous, which include: an antiseptic, a solvent, a fuel additive (!), and literal rocket fuel (!!!).

Good luck.

1. Everclear

Speaking of grain alcohol and ethanol, we bring you the scourge known as Everclear, a 190 proof (95% alcohol) monstrosity that will send your dumbass to the emergency room —if you make it there at all.

Incredibly, while Everclear can be found in small doses in drinks like the aforementioned New Orleans Hand Grenade, brave and dumb Darwin Award candidates will actually do straight shots of Everclear to prove their manhood or some such nonsense.

Some real talk: I had a friend who spilled a bottle of Everclear on his kitchen floor at a party where people were smoking. You can see where this is headed, right? Naturally, the floor went up in flames. That’s how dangerous Everclear is: it won’t just destroy your body, it will burn your home to the ground.

It’s not every day you encounter something that makes flaming shots seem safe in comparison. There’s a reason it’s illegal in more than a dozen states.

The post These Are The Most Dangerous Alcoholic Drinks In The World appeared first on BroBible.

You can’t go wrong with the classics. Fixing a proper libation isn’t rocket science, which is why you should commit this list of classic cocktails every man should know how to make to memory.

What you order at a bar, whether fair or not, can be the first thing someone judges your character on. With that said, who hasn’t made fun of one of their buddies for ordering a piña colada?

Delicious though they may be, those kinds of cocktails can lead you down a path full of pink frills and rainbows. A real manly cocktail is equal parts strong, a challenge to drink, classy, and rugged.

Here are 10 cocktails that will put some hair on your chest.

Cheers.

10 Cocktails Every Man Should Know How To Make

Whiskey Smash

• 1/2 tablespoon of sugar
• 1 tablespoon of water
• 2 oz of bourbon whiskey
• 2 sprigs of mint

It’s like a mojito but it’s got whiskey in it, which immediately calls to mind images of mountain men with beards hunting in the mountains of Tennessee. Plus, it’s got the word “smash” in the title, which automatically makes you sound cool when ordering it. The drink is a favorite of professional chef and occasional loudmouth Bobby Flay, who delights in serving it at his restaurant in the Mohegan Sun casino. Nothing like some whiskey to numb the pain of losing money to that guy.

Old-Fashioned

• 1 sugar cube
• 3 dashes of Angostura bitters
• 1 tablespoon of club soda
• 2 oz of bourbon or rye whiskey
• 1 strip of lemon peel

This drink has made a comeback almost singlehandedly because of the show “Mad Men.” Old-fashioneds may look pretty, but man do they pack a punch. A few of these, and you’ll at least feel cool enough to wear suits, chain smoke, and call women “toots.” The question is: how were guys like Don Draper able to go back to work after slugging down a few of those bad boys?

Martini (Dry)

• 2 1/2 oz gin
• 1/2 oz dry vermouth
• 1 green olive

Martinis are proof that simplicity can be the ultimate cool. Since it’s pretty much just a mix of two types of alcohol, it takes some real fortitude to take this one down. These are best drank at hotel bars, weddings, and while hosting your own dinner parties. Oh yeah, and three words: James. Freaking. Bond.

Godfather

• 1 1/2 oz scotch
• 1/2 oz Amaretto

Though it may look like a syrupy after-dinner drink, the Godfather is only for the most experienced of drinkers. The mask of sweet amaretto masks the hard, unforgiving, edge of Scotch. Kind of like how Michael Corleone looks all smooth on the outside, but doesn’t hesitate to order someone killed when push comes to shove. C’mon, we had to make one reference to the movie.

Manhattan

• 2 oz rye whiskey
• 1/2 oz sweet vermouth
• 2-3 dashes Angostura bitters
• 1 maraschino cherry

A classic evening cocktail every man should know how to make. The blood red color lets off a little badass vibe, and the sweet taste helps it go down nicely. The Manhattan is one of the few cocktails to make it out of the dark days of Prohibition in its original form. That right there is one tough drink.

Tom Collins

• 1 1/2 oz gin
• 1 oz lemon juice
• 1/2 oz sugar syrup
• 1 maraschino cherry
• 1 lemon slice

Say you’ve just finished nine holes on a hot summer day. You want something nice and cool to drink, but aren’t in the beer kind of mood. Seek no further, the Tom Collins is your drink. Equal parts fruity and boozy, the Tom Collins is named after a strange hoax phenomenon in which people would spark up conversations about a fictional man named Tom Collins. Yeah it doesn’t make sense, but it’s still a hell of a drink.

Sidecar

• 1 1/2 oz bourbon
• 3/4 oz Cointreau
• 1/4 oz lemon juice

One of the few good things to come out of World War I, the sidecar was created in Paris. Say what you want about the French, but they really know how to drink with style. The drink is purportedly named after the sidecar that soldiers needed to be driven around in after spending a bit too much of their R and R time at the bars. Safety first indeed.

Zombie

• 1 1/4 oz lemon juice
• 1 oz dark rum
• 3/4 oz orange juice
• 1/2 oz cherry brandy
• 1/2 oz light rum
• 1/2 oz high-proof dark rum
• 2 dashes grenadine

Usually these drinks are saved for Halloween-themed parties, and judging by the amount of alcohol contained in one zombie, you should only really be drinking them on special occasions. The drink made its debut in the 1939 World’s Fair in New York. It’s reputation for swift inebriation was so well-known that in 1940 a song about the dangers of drinking too many called “Abercrombie had a Zombie” was released. And yes, too many of these will have you walking like a zombie. Har har har.

Stinger

• 1 3/4 oz brandy
• 3/4 oz white creme de menthe

These days, whatever remaining beer in the fridge can be considered a nightcap drink. Back in classier times, drinking a stinger before retiring into blacked out slumber was a perfect way to end the evening. The film Kiss Me Kate featured star Cary Grant drinking more than his fair share of stingers. That guy was one of the greatest leading men of all time. If it’s good enough for him, it’s good enough for anyone.

Rusty Nail

• 1 1/2 oz scotch
• 3/4 oz Drambuie
• 1 lemon twist

It sounds a little dirty, but there’s nothing wrong with that. Rumor has it that the name came from the fact that Scots used an actual rusty nail to stir the drink. Gross, but still a little badass. It’s a sweet drink, but it still has the nice bite that any good Scotch can give. For those who don’t necessarily drink Scotch, this is a smooth alternative.

The post 10 Classic Cocktails Every Man Should Know How To Make appeared first on BroBible.

Thanksgiving is over. You packed on 11 pounds in one day of thick gravy, mac n’ cheese, buttery mashed potatoes, and pies. So. Many. Pies. Sweet potatoes pies. Apple pies. Dutch apple pies. Pumpkin pies. Key lime pies. Cherry pies. Strawberry rhubarb pies. But after a week of eating pie for breakfast, it’s time to get back to reality. That not only means not eating 6,000 calories a day, but it also means getting back to a fitness regimen that burns off the calories from the disastrous last week. If you need to lose weight in the few weeks before holiday photos, you may want to consider these exercises that burn the most fat in the least amount of time.

In order to ensure that your naughty Thanksgiving food extravaganza doesn’t continue into the December holiday season, you best add some fitness to your life. To prevent your waistline from going from a 32W to a 42W, may we suggest these exercises?

According to a report from CNET, they tabulated the most effective exercises based on an individual who weighs 130 pounds, and used data from the American Council on Exercise (ACE) calculator. The study acknowledges that everyone is different, and while one regimen might be most effective for one person, might not be as efficient for others.

Running/Jogging – 206 calories per 30 minutes

Hiking – 176 calories per 30 minutes

Biking/Cycling 5.5 mph – 117 calories per 30 minutes

Jumping Rope (fast pace) – 115 calories per 10 minutes

Walking (moderate pace) – 97 calories per 30 minutes

Weightlifting came in at the sixth-best exercise, burning 88 calories per 30 minutes.

You can see the entire list of exercises and how much they burn over at CNET.

Another report of the best exercises from T3 found these to be the best five exercises for burning fat.

Treadmill (10 mph) – 495 calories in 30 minutes

Treadmill (7.5 mph) – 375 calories in 30 minutes

Elliptical trainer (moderate) – 315 calories in 30 minutes

Exercise bike (vigorous) – 300 calories in 30 minutes

Step aerobics (high impact) – 285 calories in 30 minutes

The post Guess Which Exercises Burn The Most Calories appeared first on BroBible.

Long before people carried every song ever created in their pockets, boomboxes ruled the world. The clunky, boxy and portable audio players were on every street corner, beach and teen bedroom.

The original boombox was developed by the Philips company, the same people that invented the cassette tape. They released the first “Radiorecorder” back in 1966. In 1989, boomboxes boasted their biggest year ever with an estimated 6.1 million units sold. Sales plunged to around 1.1 million by 2010 and the boombox seemingly disappeared.

But just like the vinyl record, the mighty boombox is making a strong comeback. At least in Japan. The only difference is the resurgence isn’t being led by old folks wanting things to go back to the way they used to be.

While radio-cassette players are viewed with nostalgia among older generations, they represent something new and fresh for young people, even if the machines themselves are considered dinosaurs.

See! Young people want this stuff!

The current excitement over the machines is being boosted by demand from older generations who want to hear the sounds of cassettes once again and young people who are perhaps experiencing radio-cassette recorders for the first time.

Damn it.

Fine, everyone wants to see the boombox come back into our lives.

According to Sogo & Seibu Co, operator of Seibu’s department stores, which hosted the exhibition, the venue mostly drew men in their 40s to 50s, along with many young people. “There is increasing attention being given to nostalgia items,” said the organiser.

If you’re in the market for a new “ghettoblaster” (hey, it’s a real term, I didn’t make it up!) there are plenty of originals available on eBay, or you could be super boring and buy a new one on Amazon.

[via Bangkok Post]

The post Ask Your Dad Where He’s Hiding His Old Boombox Because They’re Making A Big Comeback appeared first on BroBible.

Editor’s Note: Welcome to a new daily column we’re running here at BroBible breaking down the day’s biggest stories in sports finance with commentary from the equities analyst and sports fanatic perspectives. It comes to us via our friends at JohnWallStreet, publisher of a free e-mail newsletter focused on sports related public equities. You can sign up here.

SKI RESORTS CONCERNED AS TRUMP LOOKS TO OVERHAUL J-1 VISA PROGRAM

President Trump is considering overhauling a program that provides 300,000 foreign visitors/year (primarily college students) with the opportunity to work temporarily in the United States. As part of his “Buy American and Hire American” campaign, Trump is evaluating several options including; the elimination of J-1 via program, imposing new requirements on program participants and/or requiring employers to prove they are unable to find Americans who want the temporary jobs. Ski resort operators are particularly concerned and have urged Trump administration officials to keep the program intact, as foreign students are estimated to fill 7,000 jobs during the December-March U.S. ski season.

Howie Long-Short: Ever ski/snowboard Hunter Mountain? Mount Snow? Jack Frost? They are all owned by ski resort operator Peak Resorts (SKIS). SKIS recently announced revenues of $7.5 million for Q1 2018, a 6% YOY increase, during their slowest time of the year. The company also expressed optimism for the upcoming season, as sales of its “Peak Pass” are up 9% from this time last year.

Fan Marino: Don’t confuse the J-1 program for cheap labor. Ski resorts are required to pay the same salaries to foreign students that they would to U.S. citizens and in some cases, are required to invest in housing or meal plans for students studying abroad. If the resorts could hire local, they would.

ZEBRA TECHNOLOGIES, WILSON SPORTING GOODS DEPLOY FOOTBALL TRACKING TECHNOLOGY FOR NFL GAMES

Zebra Technologies in a collaboration with Wilson Sporting Goods, will deploy RFID-tagged footballs for every game on the 2017 NFL schedule. The football tracking technology enables the collection of real-time location, speed and rotation data; providing fans with new visualizations, statistics and fantasy recommendations. The data collected will be used during in game broadcasts and distributed through other league media partners, to enhance the fan experience.

Howie Long-Short: Wilson Sporting Goods is a subsidiary of the Amer Sports Corporation (HEL: AMEAS). Amer is a Finnish sporting goods company that owns several brands including; Louisville Slugger, Atomic and Salomon. The company recently updated its 2020 growth target, prioritizing sustainable profitable growth over consumer advances. AMEAS now targets annual mid single digit, organic, currency-neutral growth (previously said $3.5 billion EUR).

Fan Marino: Speaking of Wilson Sporting Goods, the company recently announced the launch of the Wilson Custom Racket Shop. The Shop is the first web based platform that provides players with the opportunity to design a performance tennis racket to their personal specifications. Grigor Dimitrov (ATP #11) was the first tour player to use the Shop and has been playing with the Pro Staff he designed since.

FACEBOOK’S BID FOR CRICKET FALLS SHORT; MAY PURSUE NFL MOBILE RIGHTS IN 2019

Facebook (FB) submitted a 5-year $610 million bid for the rights to stream the India Premier League. While Rupert Murdoch’s Star India (FOXA) ultimately won the bidding process, with a $2.55 billion bid (to broadcast and stream), it’s Mark Zuckerberg’s most aggressive offer for live sports to date. Facebook was the only Silicon Valley company to place a bid on the two-month long tournament, that draws 185 million worldwide.

Howie Long-Short: NFL streaming rights have always gone to a traditional phone company. That may change in 2019 though, as companies who wish to distribute media on mobile devices are likely to get involved in the bidding process. That’s great news for NFL team owners, who are currently receiving $1 billion over 4 years from Verizon.

Fan Marino: 185.7 million people watched the first 3 matches of the IPL season, roughly 8.5x the audience the Patriots/Chiefs season opener had last Thursday night. No wonder Facebook wanted that property!

CADENCE13 TO REBOOT LONG-TIME ESPN STAPLE “THE SPORTS REPORTERS” AS PODCAST

Cadence13 has announced a partnership with Mitch Albom and Mike Lupica, to relaunch “The Sports Reporters”, as a bi-weekly podcast. The podcast will feature Mitch, Mike and a cast of rotating sports writers, including Bob Ryan, Christine Brennan and Lesley Visser. ESPN cancelled the show in May, just shy of 30 years after its debut. The show is credited with being amongst the first to “embrace debate”.

Howie Long-Short: It’s been a busy year for Entercom Communications Corp. In February, the company signed a deal to acquire CBS Radio for an estimated $1 billion. Then in early August, Entercom Communications Corp. (ETM) purchased a 45% stake in DGital. DGital has since been rebranded as Cadence13. While Cadence13 is a privately held company, you can own Cadence13 through ETM.

Fan Marino: The Sports Reports had 2 all-time great moderators (Dick Schaap, John Saunders) and a rotating cast of the best sportswriters (Lupica, Albom, John Feinstein, Bob Ryan, Michael Wilbon etc.) in the business. One infamous former guest though, is disgraced/deceased Philadelphia sportswriter Bill Conlin. Conlin, who did over 300 editions of the show, was accused of molesting 4 children between the ages of 7-12, back in the 1970s. 

FOREMAN DOCUMENTARY TO AIR ON EPIX TOMORROW NIGHT; FOREMAN GRILL MANUFACTURER TO EXPAND IN TO CHINA

FOREMAN, a documentary telling the story of world champion boxer, entrepreneur and businessman George Foreman, will premiere on EPIX (OTC: MGMB) tomorrow night (September 13TH), at 8:00 P.M. EST. In 1994, at 45 years old, Foreman reclaimed the heavyweight title he had lost 20 years earlier to Ali and agreed to what would become the second most lucrative endorsement partnership in history (Jordan/Nike), with the launch of his George Foreman grill. The manufacturer of those grills, Spectrum Brands (SPB), has just announced they are expanding in to China, agreeing with Chinese e-commerce company JD.com to open a series of flagship stores that will sell Spectrum Brand products.

Howie Long-Short: Of the $5 billion in Spectrum Brand sales in 2016, only 3% came from Asia-Pacific. With 258 million people (JD.com customer base) about to get their first look at the Foreman Grill, a run on lean meaning fat reducing grilling machines looks to be on the horizon.

Fan Marino: Salton Inc., which has since merged with Spectrum Brands (SPB), paid Foreman $137.5 million in cash and stock to buy him out and to utilize his name on the product in perpetuity, back in 1998. Foreman made more than $200 million in total from the grill.

—

What is JohnWallStreet?

JohnWallStreet is not a person or location, but a destination for the educated sports fan.

While we won’t be publishing “hot takes” on LeBron’s relative greatness to Jordan, we will be offering up the most relevant sports related finance news, in easily digestible bites, with commentary from both the equities analyst and sports fanatic perspectives.

We’ll cover publicly traded professional teams & stadiums, television networks, apparel & footwear companies, equipment companies, ticketing companies, content and facilities providers. If it trades on Wall Street, and has a sports angle, it’s in our wheel house.

Howie Long-Short and Fan Marino will be providing their expert opinions on each story. They have slightly different areas of expertise. Fan Marino is a firm believer that the SEC is the premier football conference. Howie Long-Short knows it as the Security & Exchange Commission. Fan Marino lives and dies with the college selection of 5 star, blue chip recruits. Howie Long-Short spends his days analyzing blue chip stocks. Howie Long-Short knows that Black Monday occurred on October 19th, 1987. Fan Marino swears it happens every January after Week 17. You get the point.

Want the best of JohnWallStreet sent to your inbox? Sign up here!

The post Sports Finance Report: Trump Campaign Causing Concerns For Ski Resort Operators, Return of ‘The Sports Reporters’ appeared first on BroBible.

Editor’s Note: Welcome to a new daily column we’re running here at BroBible breaking down the day’s biggest stories in sports finance with commentary from the equities analyst and sports fanatic perspectives. It comes to us via our friends at JohnWallStreet, publisher of a free e-mail newsletter focused on sports related public equities. You can sign up here.

—

NFL OPENING NIGHT TV RATINGS DOWN; TUNE-IN RADIO HAS RECORD NUMBER OF LISTENERS STREAMING AUDIO

TV networks saw a 12% YOY increase in viewership during the first 3 weeks of the preseason, suggesting that regular season numbers would pick up from a disappointing 2016 season. But last Thursday night’s season opener between the Patriots and Chiefs drew a 14.6 rating, down from 16.5 last year; making it the least watched opener since 2009.

TuneIn has partnered with the NFL to provide fans worldwide with the home and away, national and Spanish radio broadcasts of all 32 NFL teams. JWS wanted to find out how if radio saw a similar uptick in preseason listeners and how the opener rated. TuneIn VP of Marketing, Scott Parker, provided some insight:

Scott Parker: “Year over year, our number of preseason listeners grew by 70%. This is indicative of all of the ways people are consuming NFL content, especially with the growing usage of streaming audio, in the preseason. We actually had success in a unique Preseason stunt featuring a joint Audiocast with the Patriots and Texans. We do see a correlation between Preseason and Regular season and saw record numbers for the season opener.”

Howie Long-Short: TuneIn isn’t public, but the company is backed by Comcast Ventures. CMCSA co-led a $50 million round in April 2017 to fund the buildout of TuneIn’s Premium Subscription service offerings.

Fan Marino: A recent ESPN (DIS) poll indicated that 68% of avid NFL fans live outside their favorite team’s home market. I’m not sure how ESPN defined avid, but that can’t be accurate. Americans live a median distance of 18 miles from where they grew up.

ESPN INTRODUCING “SPORTSCENTER RIGHT NOW”; TRYING TO KEEP BRAND RELEVANT IN AGE OF DIGITAL MEDIA

ESPN is experimenting with the implementation of “SportsCenter Right Now” segments, 90 second updates designed to provide the viewer with up-to-the-minute game scores or breaking news. By January, the spots will appear several times an hour within all daytime ESPN programming and during halftime of games aired on ESPN/ABC (DIS); simultaneously airing on ESPN.com and within the home screen video player on the ESPN app. ESPN is using “SportsCenter Right Now” to keep the SportsCenter brand relevant, in a time when fans can access highlights on demand through various social media channels.

Howie Long-Short: SportsCenter ratings have fallen 30% since 2010 (40% in younger demo), so something had to be done. Turning SC into a digital property makes sense. Expecting Jemele Hill and Michael Smith to drive viewers, does not.

Fan Marino: For fans of ESPN radio, the spots will sound familiar. They are the live TV equivalent of the updates that have run 2x/hour on the station for years. Of course, as a loyal Mongo, I prefer to get my updates from the Mink Man.

FED APPROVES SALE OF CABELA’S CREDIT CARD BUSINESS; ELIMINATES LAST HURDLE IN BASS PRO SHOPS ACQUISITION

The Federal Reserve System has approved the proposed acquisition of World’s Foremost Bank (Cabela’s credit card business) by Synovus Bank (SNV), eliminating the last significant hurdle in Bass Pro Shops’ purchase of Cabela’s (CAB). Under the proposed deal, Synovus would assume $1.2 billion in deposits, $4.1 billion in non-deposit liabilities and the balance of World’s assets, approximated to total $5.7 billion. Capital One (COF) would take over credit card receivables upon completion of the deal. Back in July, Cabela’s shareholders overwhelmingly voted (78%) in favor of selling the retail business for $4.2 billion. The deal is expected to close by October 3^rd.

Howie Long-Short: Cabela’s shareholders are breathing a sigh of relief, as the Fed’s October 3^rd deadline was quickly approaching. The company recently reported Q2 profits/earnings, with YOY same store sales down 9.7% and profits down 25% from 2016 figures. Had the deal not been approved, Bass Pro Shops almost certainly would have walked away or demanded a lower sales price.

Fan Marino: There is apparently a trend of teenagers jumping into the large aquariums at Bass Pro Shops. Anything for the Snapchat!

FITBIT PARTNERS WITH DEXCOM TO BRING GLUCOSE LEVEL DATA TO IONIC SMARTWATCH

Fitbit (FIT) has announced a partnership with Dexcom (DXCM) that will enable the brand’s new Ionic smartwatch to continuously monitor user glucose levels through a G5 mobile sensor, beginning in early 2018. The deal means that diabetes patients will be able to seamlessly transfer up to the minute glucose level data to their wrist for easy access. Dexcom’s G5 system for blood sugar monitoring requires users to embed a sensor just below the skin, with a compatible app providing levels updates every 5 minutes.

Howie Long-Short: Fitbit making the move from fitness tracking to health tracking is wise. The stock is at its highest price since January, when the company laid off 6% of its staff and first announced its intentions to introduce a smartwatch.

Fan Marino: Dexcom already has a partnership in place with Apple (AAPL), so this deal isn’t giving Fitbit a leg up in the smartwatch race. In fact, Apple is reportedly working on a non-invasive real-time glucose monitor for future versions of their Watch and is apparently far enough along in development that the company has begun feasibility testing.

BARSTOOL SPORTS TO AIR WEEKLY TAILGATE SHOW ON WATCH

Facebook (FB) has agreed to a partnership with Barstool Sports that will give Watch, FB’s new video platform, original sports programming content. “The Barstool Tailgate Show” will cover college football storylines and comedic news from a different campus each week, with shows airing on Facebook Live prior to the Saturday night ABC/ESPN (DIS) primetime game. Barstool Founder Dave Portney and former Colts Punter and Barstool personality Pat McAfee, will host the show. Financial details of the deal were not released, but Facebook is investing in the production of the show and would be the ones to secure future and benefit from corporate sponsors.

Howie Long-Short: Barstool had a live show Super Bowl week on Comedy Central (VIAB). The show had 310K viewers and beat the Daily Show by 7% in the 18-34 male demo, on Monday January 30^th (their first show). That is where the good news ended though, by Thursday, February 3^rd, the audience had fallen to 217K viewers, no better than the worst rated Futurama rerun that the network ran the week prior.

Fan Marino: Watch is quickly scooping up non-traditional sports content that Millennials eat up (see: “Ball in the Family”). It’s a smart strategy for a company that wants to be in the sports streaming business, isn’t getting NFL games (existing deals run through 2022) or NBA games (existing deals run through 2025) anytime soon, and needs to put out original content to draw video advertising dollars that will drive future revenue growth. What kind of Stoolie is on Facebook at 7:30p on Saturday night though?

—

What is JohnWallStreet?

JohnWallStreet is not a person or location, but a destination for the educated sports fan.

While we won’t be publishing “hot takes” on LeBron’s relative greatness to Jordan, we will be offering up the most relevant sports related finance news, in easily digestible bites, with commentary from both the equities analyst and sports fanatic perspectives.

We’ll cover publicly traded professional teams & stadiums, television networks, apparel & footwear companies, equipment companies, ticketing companies, content and facilities providers. If it trades on Wall Street, and has a sports angle, it’s in our wheel house.

Howie Long-Short and Fan Marino will be providing their expert opinions on each story. They have slightly different areas of expertise. Fan Marino is a firm believer that the SEC is the premier football conference. Howie Long-Short knows it as the Security & Exchange Commission. Fan Marino lives and dies with the college selection of 5 star, blue chip recruits. Howie Long-Short spends his days analyzing blue chip stocks. Howie Long-Short knows that Black Monday occurred on October 19th, 1987. Fan Marino swears it happens every January after Week 17. You get the point.

Want the best of JohnWallStreet sent to your inbox? Sign up here!

The post Sports Finance Report: NFL Audio Streaming on Rise appeared first on BroBible.

Matt Thompson is a wood worker from Michigan who loves two things — his home state and beer. Well, he loves three things if you count the “working with wood” thing. Fine, Matt probably loves many things but he’s good at turning old trees into awesome new stuff.

Check out this sick wooden chair Matt created that pays homage to the great state of Michigan while dispensing delicious cans of beer.

To activate the beer dispenser you’ve just go to lift and lower the handle and TA-DA! Beer. The vending machine comes equipped with a slot for filling with the canned beverage of your choose and room to add ice to keep the brews cold.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=15sTcpR8aPs

[via Laughing Squid]

The post Guy Builds Awesome Wooden Chair Dedicated To His Favorite State That Doubles As A Beer Dispenser appeared first on BroBible.

Over the summer, Isaiah Thomas and Rudy Gobert got into an emoji war when both players were recruiting free agent forward Gordon Hayward to sign with their teams. Hayward eventually signed with the Celtics but it looks like Gobert got the last laugh.

After Isaiah Thomas was traded to the Cavs tonight for Kyrie Irving, Gobert retweeted Thomas’ emoji-filled tweet from this summer which has to be the pettiest retweet in the history of NBA Twitter.

https://twitter.com/TommyBeer/status/900148198983049216

[protected-iframe id=”03a937a862821cf60c742d78c338cee7-97886205-93275071″ info=”https://static.apester.com/js/sdk/v2.0/apester-javascript-sdk.min.js” height=”350″ class=”apester-media”]

God the NBA is so fun.

The post Jazz Center Rudy Gobert Mocked Isaiah Thomas With Petty Retweet After Cavs-Celtics Trade appeared first on BroBible.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3B_tFj5mQro

That’s right. That was a bunch of McDonald’s food liquified into a nasty, slimy liquid substance that pretty much looks like cat food. Granted any burger and fries would look like this if you ground them up, but it is revolting nonetheless. And to top it all off? A brave soul decides to put it down and, well, it didn’t go well.

So bros, the next time you stuff your face with a burger of any kind, just try not to think of this video.

[H/T Bad Things For Bad People, YouTube]

The post Watch All Of This McDonald’s Food Get Liquified Into A Nasty Milkshake And End On The Grossest Of Notes appeared first on BroBible.

Rocky (Rocky) – Miller Lite

It doesn’t get more vintage than Miller Lite. It’s not my favorite beer by any means, but damn do they know how to get people drinking it. This was a beer of an older generation, but Miller Lite did a great job with revamping their brand and getting cans back into people’s hands. And thus, a new, old beer was born. Something that represented an older, tougher generation, but has survived over the years. This is Rocky Balboa to a T. He’s a survivor and almost always comes out on top. He never quits and gives it his all. And, in the end, people love him for it.

John McClane (Die Hard) – Budweiser

Yes, there has been huge controversy with Anheuser-Busch somewhat recently, but at the end of the day a good, a cold Budweiser might be the most classic move a guy can make. It’s heavy and can quench thirst in one fell sip. Its got a hard taste to it that resembles John McClane in a bottle. He’s the toughest SOB on the planet. McClane can be shot, walk on glass and survive mountains of rooftop explosions and STILL make it home for Christmas. That, my friends, is the definition of hard.

The Terminator (The Terminator) – Yuengling

The Terminator is a death-dealing human cyborg who is strictly business. He has a hard bite (obviously), but he deals his killings with zero emotion. Much like The Terminator, Yuengling is beyond subtle in its drinkability, but has a bit of a bite when it hits the lips. It’s basic, emotionless, but that’s what makes it a good beer. All that matters is its bite, and damn is it a tasty one.

Neo (The Matrix) – Stella Artois

Although not a go-to for my weekends, Stella does have a swift, light and confident taste to it that makes it go down easy, but without being too watery. Neo, from The Matrix, embodies this spirit 120%, as all of his actions are swift, clean and confident in their execution. Be it flying, fighting or stopping bullets, confidence and control radiates from him.

Indiana Jones (Indiana Jones) – Bud Light

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nPGxSotEa-c

Similar to the other classics, Bug Light is a staple for many. And so is Indiana Jones. He is the ultimate adventurer and is always reliable. We know what we are getting when we see Indy in action: fun, mayhem, puzzle-solving and a guy who is damn slick with the ladies. Similar to Dr. Jones is Bug Light, a trusty reliable that’s been around for ages and is something we know well and can order when we want a good, classic beer.

Mad Max (Mad Max) – Four Loco

It’s simple. Yes, this is the only example that’s not a beer, but for Mad Max a Four Loco is the only choice. This drink is nuts. It is so nuts it has even made news because of how dangerous it can be (much like Max himself). Like the Road Warrior, this drink kicks you in the face after the first sip and gets you up and ready to rock n’ roll.

James Bond (James Bond) – Heineken

Was it too predictable for this to be Bond’s equivalent? Well, that’s because the old Heineken commercials were right. Similar to Stella, but with a bit sharper taste, Heineken is sleek and easy to put down. Some can’t stand it. Others love it. This is similar to Mr. Bond since the people who love him (Q, the ladies, Moneypenny), adore him. And the people who hate him (Goldfinger, Dr. No, Oddjob, etc.) want to see him die a painful death.

Dutch (Predator) – Dogfish Head (60 Minute)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OsFYPVxHKdc

Dutch is a classic action movie hero who we don’t really hear that much about anymore, but when we do, it’s AWESOME. I mean, just look at that clip. A guy who covers himself in mud, ready to take on the Predator and reveals his position with an insanely rad war-cry? Epic. So, Dutch is in the ballpark of Dogfish Head, and definitely an IPA. He’s a 60-minute brew though due to him being a lean, mean fighting machine who can shift and mold himself to the jungle around him. Dogfish Head 60-minutes are lighter IPAs that you can drink over and over and feel like a million bucks. And hey, Dutch looks like a million bucks.

Han Solo (Star Wars) – Sam Adams Boston Lager

We are starting to get into some seriously dark territory here. Han Solo is the king of rebels (and no, I will not mark him as a Rebel IPA). He shot first and never looked back. He’s dangerous. He’s sarcastic. He’s crazy. But my favorite characteristic about this lovable space cowboy is that he’s dark. He’s fueled by being lonely and could care less about others. Until, well, you know. So, his dark, mysterious and rebellious attitude make him a Sam Adams Boston Lager. This beer is on the much heavier side and you can only have so much without getting putting square on your ass. But at the end of the day, it’s a damn good brew. Ol’ Han is gritty and dark, but damn it, he’s got a spirit that we ALL love.

Batman (All Batman Movies) – Guinness

One of the darkest, heaviest beers around, Guinness is the brew of real drinkers. It has a charcoal soul that so many of us love and who better to be paired with this brand than the Bat himself. Batman is the ultimate tragic hero, as he will never get to love or reveal his true self since he sacrifices himself for the people of Gotham, thus making his core chock-full of darkness. His bleakness is what others benefit from and recognize him as, and that is something he is ok with doing. Much like Guinness, its dark makeup, HEAVY taste and pronunciation are what we love about it.

Ellen Ripley (Alien) – Terrapin Hopsecutioner

Ever heard of Terrapin? Or Hopsecutioner? Well it’s a damn good IPA that packs a whole lotta punch in just one serving. Much like the badass Ripley, a woman who is hellbent on not only surviving, but taking down that demon spawn alien with her. She has the biggest heart of any action hero I can think of and shows no mercy. Similar to this IPA, watch out, because you get a lot for what you pay for.

The Bride (Kill Bill) – Dos Equis

Honestly, The Bride terrifies me. If I saw her in real life, I would just bow to her with my head down and let her pass. She’s lethal. She’s smart. And she is very, very cool. Dos Equis is a good tasting, cool beer that can be sipped at any time really, hot or cold. This is The Bride through and through. She kicks ass and takes names all while doing it with a sense of slickness. These two belong with each other. Most interesting man in the world? Try most interesting bride in the world.

Bodhi (Point Break) – Corona Extra

Would you have expected anything else for one of the best characters in film history? Just like a sand-covered Corona, Bodhi is super chill, good vibes and high-fives. But when he needs to be, he can kick the tires and light the fires and become a vessel of pure mayhem. From my experience with Corona this is what happens. The first few go down so easy and taste great. Then, you are causing mayhem on the beach because OOPS! There goes that 12-pack.

John Rambo (First Blood) – Dogfish Head (120 Minute)

This is one of the most potent, heavy tasting beers around. It is actually dangerous to drink more than three of these things. They taste amazing, but seriously, watch out. The same can always be said about crazy man John Rambo. Watch. Out.

Snake Plissken (Escape From New York/LA) – Tecate

One of my all-time favorite action movie heroes, Snake Plissken truly cares about nothing. Every word he says has a sting to it, but he also has a classic common man in him. He’s the kind of guy who just wants to be left alone damnit! So, he and Tecate are perfect for each other. Tecate is the perfect mixture of mainstream, but with a bite. We can all relate to Snake, but he will never want to talk to us about it. Ever.

Sarah Connor (Terminator 2: Judgement Day) – Snake Venom: The World’s Strongest Beer

And, of course, the best has been saved for last. Sarah Connor is an unstoppable, machine-gun brained fighter who is genuinely one of the scariest, most unapologetic action heroes ever. That being said, she deserves the strongest beer in the world. The one that scares 99% of the general population. She will never stop and is someone you definitely want on your side. By the way, be careful consuming this beverage.

Enjoy these picks? Got more? Let me know what else could be added. But until then, light up your green flares, crack a brew and drink to the amazing action heroes of our generation.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aEt1ePZGHTY

The post Kick The Tires And Light The Fires: We Paired Every Iconic Action Star With The Beer They Would Most Likely Be appeared first on BroBible.

Technology-driven innovation’s rewarding us some unanticipated and strange things guys. I mean besides this Dr. Pepper shake, just today we learned that YouTube’s comin’ in hot on developing the technology necessary to enjoy 360-degree video live-streams from our homes. The days of breaking your bank to load up the car with booze and all other manners of ingestible madness as you set out for a brain-decimating, seriously overpriced weekend festival are coming to a close. Pretty soon you’ll be able to enjoy Coachella or Sasquatch or Bonnaroo with twice the amount of booze and drugs ’cause you didn’t have to throw down a fat steaming pile of Benjamins for damn festival wristband-tickets that usually end up way too tight, and cutting off the circulation of blood in your arms.

Anyways, back to more important things like you,your phone, and the nearest pinpoint for a Burger King. Honestly, who’s to say whether this won’t end up an epic 23 different kinds of disastrous failed experiment, like that one time at Laser Tag when your friends convinced you to combine all the sodas to create a ‘graveyard.’ But for those of you that enjoy the finer, more distinguished, efficient arterie-clogging pleasures in life like Dr. Pepper floats this sick(ening) limited edition frosty will for sure get the job done.

The post Burger King Just Took A Frosty Dr. Pepper Flavored Dump On Humanity With Their New Milkshake appeared first on BroBible.

For those of you who aren’t exactly creative kitchen creatures, like me, here’s an outstanding and easy way — a very cheap one, I might add — to improve the taste of the already delectable things in life, like popcorn:

PUT DORITOS IN YOUR PEPPER GRINDER.

Holy shit. How is something like this not already “a thing”? A very popular “thing”? The possibilities are endless, especially since there are currently 9,000 different kinds of Doritos. But it most certainly doesn’t have to end with Cool Ranch Doritos raining over each and every meal.

Grinding M&M’s over a bowl of ice cream sounds pretty fun. And so does grinding Cinnamon Toast Crunch over buttery toast, as the video above demonstrates. Or crushing up some salt and vinegar chips onto a plate of buffalo wings. Or whatever the fuck it is that tickles your food fancy.

Another day, another gateway to fatness that will certainly lead to more inventive gateways to fatness. But it is the holiday season, so embrace that shit. Remember, cardio doesn’t technically start until January.

[H/T Skillet]

The post Putting Doritos In Your Pepper Grinder Is As Genius As It Sounds appeared first on BroBible.

However, and this is key, this shit won’t be coming to your door without a steep delivery fee between $4.99 and $6.99. Add that to the food order itself and the tip — unless you’re a cheap asshole — and you’re not just ordering takeout, you’re making a very strong commitment to not giving a fuck about anything.

KFC has partnered with DoorDash to process orders through its app or website, and Houston is supposedly the next city on the list, with possibly more to come.

Your move, Popeyes. May we suggest a delivery push on the East Coast?

[via The Modesto Bee]

The post KFC Wants To Make You Fatter, Will Deliver Buckets Of Chicken On-Demand In L.A. And San Francisco appeared first on BroBible.

[via Digg]

The post How To Choose The Right Glass For Any Beer — Instead Of Chugging Straight From A Can appeared first on BroBible.

Why? Because organic is better. Or at least that’s what food marketers up in their illuminati office tell us sheeple.

Organic food, for those who don’t know yet, is food that is non gmo, and raised without the use of most pesticides. Organic usually brings into mind a bunch of farmers working on a small plot of land, wearing too much burlap, smoking mass amounts of weed, probably not wearing shoes, and white people with dreadlocks.

I believe some people actually orgasm when buying organic. Their tie to living the organic lifestyle is that strong.

A lot of these people tend to have a self-righteous way about them as well. They’ll talk about the “natural” quality to their food, how it’s better for them, why you need to eat organic, this is almost always unsolicited, and explain that the pesticides and GMO’s are killing us dead as we speak.

Is any of this really true though? Is organic food healthier?

There is absolutely something to be said about the factory farming way we produce our beef and other vegetables. Cows, chickens, and other animals aren’t healthier when they’re not allowed to live a normal lifestyle and force fed food packed with antibiotics, hormones, etc.

This doesn’t do us much good, and if anything it contributes to the growing problem of us being wiped out by a fucking superbug. But it also delivers us a fat 20oz ribeye. So yes, I am conflicted.

The same can be said about farmers and sometimes too liberal use of pesticides when spraying plants. Plants develop resistance, and more pesticide needs to be used. At some point this becomes an issue, because those products make their way into the water cycle.

There are absolutely issues with our food system and how subsidies support sugar laden and hyper palatable foods, and the focus is put on factory farming only a few crops. Using massive parcels of land for a few crops hurts our biodiversity, which could potentially fuck us in the long term.

Organic solves none of these issues though.

The whole pesticide issue is one that people repeatedly talk about when it comes to organic food. Hell, I even had a client one time who actually told me he could “taste” the pesticides when he bought conventional produce. I almost pulled a Diddy and hit him with a kettlebell.

The reality is, organic farmers can use pesticides all they fucking want to. The pesticides they can use haven’t been approved by the FDA. I’m sure these farmers have the best interest in mind, and hope to raise their crops as ethically as possible, but that doesn’t automatically make it better.

One of the common myths about pesticide usage is that it winds up on our food. In reality, very little pesticide residue remains on the fruit or vegetable when it’s ready for human consumption. Even if there is some residue leftover, a decent washing of your vegetables like a normal human being should do the trick.

But GMO foods aren’t “natural”.

When people throw out this line they’ve got good intentions, but they have no fucking clue what the word “natural” even means.

A ton of GMO foods aren’t natural, but a lot of foods we eat have evolved without our help. Another term for that evolution? Genetic modification. Fuck, there are even examples of this taking place 8,000 years ago with sweet potatoes. In case you weren’t aware, Monsanto hasn’t been around that long. Nature, the cruel slut she is did that.

Want another example of what a natural food used to look like? Tell me how appetizing banana’s, corn, carrots, and watermelon used to look.

GMO foods may not be natural, but they’re made larger and to look more enticing. Know who is to blame for that? We are. We constantly want bigger and better. Companies like Monsanto are responding to the demands of the market. That’s like the most American thing ever.

Growing local, in season foods is a smart play and a good response if you’re terrified of GMO’s. This is one the biggest benefits to community gardens that are popping up all over the place. This sort of thing helps our biodiversity, and if you’re looking to get “natural”, this is a good way to do it. If you want a more thorough rundown of the GMO debate, Beth at Lifehacker did the damn thing in this piece.

Organic isn’t healthier, and it never was. Foods have been evolving, just like everything else on this gigantic rock hurtling through space, for millions of years. If you love to buy organic, there’s nothing wrong with that. If you buy organic meats or vegetables for ethical reasons, all the more power to you. Don’t be an organic snob though. All of your friends will hate you, and they’ll start eating at restaurants that don’t serve organic to phase you out of their friend circle.

The post Are Hipsters Actually Onto Something? Is Organic Food Healthier? appeared first on BroBible.

One of the most common ways to do this is to use products that are 0 calories and contain some sort of artificial sweetener like aspartame, otherwise known as cancer powder.

The big issue a lot of people are dying to know (LOL at that pun) is if artificial sweeteners are actually putting the final nail in your coffin, or if they’re something that’s perfectly fine in the context of a normal diet, and can actually help you lose weight.

First, a rundown on why people use artificial sweeteners:

0 calorie sweeteners are used by people because they help cut out calories. Things like aspartame provide 0 caloric hit, but still pack a sweet punch. For someone who is trying to lose weight, this is a big freaking deal. Eating foods that are lower in calories and satisfying your sweet tooth could help lots of people stay on their diet without totally fucking it up by eating 12 cookies and binging on Netflix.

For example:

Say you’ve only got about 2,000 calories to spend in a given day and still lose fat. Only having to spend a whopping 0 of those on something sweet like a Coke Zero, and using the rest on highly nutritious foods that are filling, and good for you is far better than spending 400+ on a food that isn’t very filling or doesn’t pack a nutritious punch.

It’s a no brainer, that isn’t giving you brain cancer.

Why people think artificial sweeteners are killing them:

We freak out about artificial sweeteners mainly because of headlines. There’s really no better explanation than the fact that the 24 hour news cycle always needs something to report on, and if they can get a crazy headline out of a study involving a bunch of rats, they will.

The reality is, aspartame is one of the most studied food additives in existence today. It’s been studied hundreds of times in a shit ton of countries. Seriously, something like 90 countries have studied aspartame and its effects. When something gets studied that often, if it turns out to be really bad it usually gets banned completely.

We constantly hear about the dangers of aspartame, and the issues that its consumption might be linked to. What we don’t hear about is how much aspartame it takes to become dangerous.

There is in fact a limit to how much aspartame someone should safely consume within a given day, and that limit can be reached by drinking about 18 diet cokes in a single day.

If you’re hitting your daily limit of aspartame thanks to 18 diet cokes, or a high intake of foods that contain artificial sweeteners, then you definitely need to make some changes. Even then, I’d argue your diet is probably so poor that artificial sweeteners probably shouldn’t be the #1 concern on your list.

In addition to all of the media mumbo jumbo is the fact that most of the studies blown out of proportion are done on rodents. Now, I’ve got nothing against rodents. Most of them are pretty chill bros just trying to get by. But bro rodents and human rodents aren’t exactly the same thing.

Bro rodents have tails. We don’t. Bro rodents get caught in mouse traps chasing cheese, and we get caught in traps chasing women. Bro rodents also metabolize things like aspartame differently than humans.

Rodent studies are absolutely valuable, and they’re necessary for us to learn. They aren’t the end all be all when it comes to recommending dietary advice to humans though. Maybe if we had tails, it would be more applicable.

Side note: holy shit would it be sweet to have a tail or what?

Sure, dosing a rat full of aspartame can give it cancer. That same thing can be said for damn near anything. The poison is in the dose. Even for things as safe as water.

Aspartame and other artificial sweeteners aren’t killing you. If you’re trying to lose weight, drop fat, get sexy, or any other term for looking studly then artificial sweeteners can offer a serious benefit. Don’t believe me? Check out the badass rundown my friends over at Examine.com put together. They dig far deeper into the science than I could ever have the patience to.

The post Is Using Artificial Sweeteners Really Just Like Using Cancer Powder? appeared first on BroBible.

From The Huffington Post:

If passed, House Bill 502 would outlaw consumption of alcohol, with penalties mirroring those currently in place for marijuana possession. Those found with small amounts of alcohol would be subject to fines of up to $500, and anyone involved in the sale and distribution stream could face up to 30 years in prison and $1 million in penalties.

Incredibly harsh. But then again, O’Sullivan and Pearson proposed the legislation to make a point. Did they think it would ever pass? No way. But has it got a lot of heads to turn? Oh yes.

In fact, O’Sullivan has openly said she doesn’t even support Bill 502, but she thinks it illustrates pretty well how hypocritical some other lawmakers have been in giving their support for weed to finally be legalized.

O’Sullivan herself acknowledges that even she doesn’t support the substance of the bill. Rather, “the object was to basically embarrass leadership to say that we have [marijuana legalization bills] in front of us, and they’re going absolutely nowhere.”

The lawmakers hope to give momentum to legalization in Vermont by raising awareness about the broad scientific consensus that marijuana is the least dangerous recreational drug on the market. A study published in February found that pot had the lowest risk of mortality when compared with nine other commonly used drugs, including alcohol and tobacco.

“We’re certainly not going to ban alcohol, but when you say you’ll let a drug like that be legalized and then you have a drug like marijuana that’s far safer that’s still banned, it’s completely ironic,” O’Sullivan said.

The Representative makes a great point. It’s well-documented that there has never been a single death linked to a marijuana overdose. By contrast, the Center For Disease Control and Prevention estimates that more some 88,000 Americans are killed each year due to excessive alcohol consumption. That translates to 2.5 million years of life lost, which is both alarming and tragic, and all the more reason to get behind the legalization of weed, for which therapeutic effects have been recorded for centuries.

Pearson and O’Sullivan are also responsible for introducing and sponsoring Bill H.277, which seeks to legalize the sale and regulation of marijuana throughout Vermont. State revenue estimates range between $20 million and $70 million annually should the bill pass and spurn the development of a regulated marijuana industry. That sounds awful promising considering Vermont is currently staring down a $113 million budget deficit.

The post Vermont Legislators Propose Alcohol Prohibition If Weed Isn’t Legalized ASAP appeared first on BroBible.

And that’s why it’s a downright horrible idea that a brewery in Oregon just received the government go-ahead to manufacture beer – a yellow lager, to be specific – using actual human waste and other sewage products, so to speak.

Per Yahoo News UK:

While some drinkers might balk at the frothy, golden brew, Oregon’s Clean Water Services hope it will show off just how pure the water they recycle from sewage is.

Oregon waste water treatment company Clean Water Services is proud of its ‘high purity’ recycling system – and applied to the Oregon Environmental Quality Commission to be allowed to brew it into beer.

Permission was granted this Wednesday.

So, am I the only one that is super skeptical about this? I mean, I’m all for green initiatives, yada yada, but the thought that the beer I’m drinking, in some parts, potentially passed through another human’s kidneys at one time is pretty damn repulsing regardless of how well-refined Clean Water Services considers their water.

However, for your and my well-being, at least the initiative isn’t being pursued on a grand scale. Rather, it’s a small home craft brewery by the name of Oregon Brew Crew that is set to take the reigns with piss project.

A local home-brewing group, Oregon Brew Crew will now create a sewage beer to serve at company events – although the finished product will have to be passed by local health and safety.

The local health authority approved the idea, citing, ‘The high quality of the treated water, additional microbial reduction in the brewing process, and a low health risk overall.’

Yeah, it’s not so much the general health risks as much as it is the general idea of drinking what was once sewage, so with that…

I’m out.

The post An Oregon Brewery Is Making Beer From Human Waste, So That’s Incredibly Gross appeared first on BroBible.

The Veggie Sliders are available starting today and the burger joint claims they were answering the “demands and prayers” of vegetarians “who accompany their meat eating friends to White Castle.”

So what’s in these patties? The prayers of vegans. And peas.

“The patties are made by Dr. Praeger’s, which is a popular brand available in the freezer section of many grocery stores. White Castle says each patty is “chock full of lots of vegetables like carrots, zucchini, peas, spinach, broccoli, and more.” The 99 cent burgers also come with a choice of three sauces: honey mustard, ranch, or sweet Thai.”

Um. Bullshit. No one who goes to White Castle is friends with a vegan and no vegans step foot in White Castle. If you’re a vegetarian, vegan or anything else along the spectrum the last place you’d go, or would accompany a friend, is a fucking meat factory like White Castle or any burger chain for that matter. I don’t think fans of White Castle even like to go to White Castle.

[H/T: The Roosevelts]

The post You Can Finally Take Your Girl To White Castle Because They’ve Got Veggie Burgers Now appeared first on BroBible.

For as long as I can remember, I was transfixed with this universe that’s half Roman gladiators and half vaudeville, equaling something akin to a violent 4th Grade play. I followed my dream I transformed myself from a wide-eyed boy to the boot-wearing man-child you see today.

Now I’m no Lou Thesz (look him up), but I’m happy to say that pro wrestling has taken me across North America and provided me with amazing opportunities in film, television and comedy that only Boston Crabs could have prepared me for (the Boston Crab is a wrestling move, not what you got from in the Fenway Park bathroom).

I’ve been able to share stories, slams and screen time with my childhood heroes whose action figures I used to (and still) have. There’s no better feeling than making your entrance in a sold out arena.

I’ve also made my entrance in bingo halls that have had more plastic balls than fans. The journey of a wrestler is an unstable one; probably because there is no other industry like it.

Professional wrestling is organized like the mob. A well oiled, highly exaggerated mob. You learn a bunch of secrets, there are bizarre social rules, you have to know somebody to get “made” and there’s always a looming threat of dramatized violence.

Becoming one is the epitome of underground subculture; it’s probably easier to join a cock-fighting league. That first step onto the mat is the craziest one. Especially when I realized that none of the shit I practiced on my N64’s WWF No Mercy is going to work.

Here’s what I learned.

The most painful truths I learned about pro wrestling is; you’ll stink of B.O., it just won’t be your own. And not just your run-of-the-mill B.O. either. Ripe, week-long, hard earned, “I just drove in from Kentucky” -type stench. And that’s in addition to the bad breath, dirty gear, sweat, grease, saliva, blood and (when a guy who just ate a burrito misses his top-rope splash) there’s bound to be a skid mark or two.

I get to know my opponent’s body far better than I know my own. While the homosexual overtones may be obvious, there actually couldn’t be anything less gay. This is the un-romanticized male body and everything that is grotesquely disgusting about it, causing me to reject my own gender and run towards a vagina like a bottle of Dasani in the desert.

The governing social norms of pro wrestling were developed like Lord of the Flies, if all those kids were fat bullies who immensely enjoyed having constant nosebleeds. Case in point; if you hurt your opponent, they are allowed, encouraged and almost obliged to hurt you back, adorably known as a “receipt.”

Now, on the surface, this rule looks good. What’s the answer to violence? More fucking violence! But honestly, this rule is a little too good. Retaliating with socially justified violence sounds so awesome that guys are literally waiting to get hit first. If I was legally allowed to stab anyone who bumped into me, I’d be standing in the middle of Times Square with a sabre in my hand (Yes, in this hypothetical I have a sabre. You don’t like it? Write your own article).

So what happens when you have a bunch of grown men functioning on the excuse of “he hit me first”? Black eyes, a lot of limping and a horribly misplaced sense of pride.

Nobody cares about referees.

They are the sole officials in a wrestling match, but everyone follows their rules like they’re a substitute teacher. Maybe that’s because they’re so one-dimensional. Pinned your opponent? They count to three. Doing an illegal move? They count to five. Wrestling outside the ring? They count to 10. Clearly you don’t need a post-secondary education to apply.

The worst they can do is disqualify you, which means you can continue beating the shit out of your opponent as they vainly attempt to stop you, while the bell is repeatedly rung by the bell ringer (what a multifaceted individual that guy is).

Professional wrestling names are just a small step above porn names, and even then, only in some cases. Pick a good one and it’ll make you a certified bad ass for the rest of your life (need I remind everyone that we just mourned the loss of a guy named Ultimate Warrior). Pick a bad one and…well okay, they’re all kind of bad, just to varying degrees.

Alliteration is huge (Hulk Hogan, Hunter Hearst Helmsley, Pepper Parks), as are intentionally misspelled one-word monikers (Kane, Rhyno) and meticulously flashy last names (Ric Flair, Randy Savage, CM Punk). Ironic pun names have also made quite a splash (Hugh Morrus, Dusty Rhodes, Paul Bearer) although they sound like names your “hilarious” drunk uncle would conceive.

If you’re a girl, you’ll be selecting actual porn-quality names, so a transition from one scantily clad, male-dominated, emotion-feigning industry to another should be seamless.

If you’re looking for a gimmick and you have even one fraction of an ethnic background, prepare to embrace it fully. Professional wrestling is like your bubbly, energetic, loveable grandmother…who also happens to be racist. No one gives a shit about your beautifully nuanced character, there’s a reason they’re not watching AMC. Wrestling fans want broad strokes, obscenely broad strokes.

“Oh, you’re 1/28th Iranian? You’re now Sheik Ayatollah Islamadam and your finish is the Camel Clutch.” Before you get offended; wrestling doesn’t discriminate, it’s equally racist to everyone. Every race, religion, sexual orientation and social group will have its very own harshly drawn caricature in its honor. It’s your own U.N. Deathmatch; may the best stereotype win.

In a way, it can be thought of as the descendant of ancient mythology; the Greek Gods, broadly drawn embodiments, doing battle to deepen the philosophies of mortal man. Only with less body oil.

For something that’s fake, it could be a lot more fake. Yes, it’s not real. But that’s kind of like telling your parents you were “just playing around” when you were really beating the shit out of your younger brother. They are actually doing everything they appear to be doing, but they’re just hoping no one gets seriously hurt. What high illusion.

If wrestlers were magicians, there would be a lot of dead rabbits.

RJ Skinner is a professional wrestler by day and plays Gildar on Nickelodeon’s Splatalot at night. It might actually be the other way around. Follow RJ on Twitter.

The post Racism Sells And 5 Other Tough Lessons I Learned As A Professional Wrestler appeared first on BroBible.

National Apple Dumpling day is a real thing that exists (today is that day), and the only way to properly celebrate is with bourbon. Making Drunken Apple Dumplings is easier than you think. I managed to learn how yesterday, and I’m an idiot.

I come across a lot of things that make me say, “I should definitely try that.” Whether it’s a recipe for something ridiculous like Oreo Lasagna or a recipe that could be tweaked into greatness with a little booze, there are brilliant ideas floating around on which none of us capitalize. That all changes with my bastard lovechild of Lifehacker and Pinterest, the Guyism Grill.

You don’t need much to make Drunken Apple Dumplings. If you’ve done any cooking at all, it’s entirely possible that you already have every ingredient except the pie crust. I was tempted to make a crust from scratch just so I had an excuse to use a vodka bottle rolling pin, but as an outdated reference repeatedly said, “Ain’t nobody got time for that.”

Step one is to peel each (Granny Smith) apple and create a home for butter and spices. I’m a degenerate in the kitchen, so I don’t have proper gadgets like an apple corer, but a knife and small spoon did the trick just fine. I got in there with a small measuring spoon to really cleanse the colon of all its seeds. Just be sure you don’t go all the way through the apple.

Set each peeled/cored apple in a thawed pie crust. The dough needs to be pliable, or this is never going to work. Technically you’re supposed to use a square piece of crust, but I said screw it and used the entire thing. Two crusts, two apples… it was destiny.

Put a couple small pieces of butter in the bottom of the artist formerly known as an apple core. Add some of the spice mixture of cinnamon, nutmeg, and brown sugar. Fun fact, you can’t taste cinnamon; you only smell it. Throw in some more butter, then spice mix, then butter, then top it off with spice mix. Don’t worry if you miss the hole; this is one of the few times no one will yell at you for it. Getting brown sugar all over the crust isn’t going to hurt anyone.

Fold the dough up and around each apple. If you’re using entire pie crusts like me, there should be plenty to pull off and discard as you go. Or you can use the entire thing, whatever. I’m not here to judge you. I’m the guy who decided to add bourbon to a nice, wholesome dessert.

Speaking of bourbon, it’s time to make the sauce. Bring water, sugar, butter, and vanilla extract to a boil. Stir frequently as it starts to heat up to help the sugar dissolve. Once it hits a boil, turn the heat down so it’s just simmering. Now add the bourbon. At this point you almost have a garnish-less Old Fashioned, only with butter and vanilla instead of bitters. That’s right, we’re using a cocktail as a sauce for apples. Deal with it. Let it reduce for about 10 minutes. Before you complain, no, all the alcohol will not burn off. That’s not how science works.

Place the two apples in a greased baking dish, and pour the sauce all over them. I tried to get some in the opening at the top because I was feeling frisky, but you do whatever makes your heart flutter.

Hopefully you pre-heated your oven to 400 degrees even though I didn’t mention that before. If not, do it now and apologize for not reading the entire article before starting. Once the oven is good and hot, put the apples on the center rack for 50 minutes. You can add or subtract time depending on how crisp or mushy you want the apples to be. Open the oven every 10-15 minutes and spoon some of liquid over the apples.

Voila, you have Drunken Apple Dumplings. It doesn’t get much easier than this. Like I said, I just learned how to make them yesterday. I had never made a dumpling before let alone one involving bourbon and fruit. Aside from the crust splitting in a few places because I pulled it too tightly, they turned out perfectly.

Now you just throw in some ice cream and eat it. Vanilla ice cream is for vanilla people, so I used Milky Way instead. It’s also what I had on hand for tomorrow’s Ultimate Oreo Ice Cream Sandwich.

Ingredients:

• 2 pre-made 9″ crusts
• 2 large Granny Smith apples, peeled and cored
• 1/4 cup butter
• 1/4 cup brown sugar
• 1/2 teaspoon ground cinnamon
• 1/4 teaspoon ground nutmeg
• 1 cup water
• 2/3 cup white sugar
• 1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract
• 1/2 cup bourbon

Directions:

1. Preheat oven to 400 degrees F. Butter a 9×13 inch pan.
2. Mix brown sugar, cinnamon and nutmeg in a bowl and set aside.
3. Peel and core your apples; place each in a thawed pie crust.
4. Put a small piece of butter in vacant core, then some of the brown sugar & spice mix. More butter and some more brown sugar. Sprinkle some cinnamon and brown sugar on the outside of the apple (but inside the crust, duh.)
5. Wet your fingertips and carefully bring the pie crust up and around the apple. If it tears, just smash extra pieces of crust on the exposed apple.
6. Place apples in greased glass baking dish and set aside.
7. In a small saucepan, combine water, white sugar, vanilla extract and rest of butter. (About 2 tbls) Place over medium heat, and bring to a boil. Add bourbon and simmer for 10 minutes. Carefully pour over dumplings.
8. Bake in preheated oven for 50 to 55 minutes. Place each apple dumpling in a dessert bowl, and spoon some sauce over the top.
9. Add ice cream, eat, go try another recipe.

For those curious (why?), yes, this recipe is R.Kelly apron approved.

Recipe modified from TheHedonistCook

This post was originally published on September 17th, 2013.

The post How To Make Drunken Apple Dumplings, Because Today Is National Apple Dumpling Day appeared first on BroBible.

Hurricanes 400 miles offshore will cause coastal flooding, the Midwest will be baking and Arizona bone dry.

But, Canada will be nice. So, if you don’t want to move to Canada, do something to stop global warming. I don’t know what that is. Bike to work tomorrow. That should do the trick.

[H/T @iAustinHunt]

The post The Weather Channel’s Mock Forecast For September 2050 Is Pretty Dang Bleak appeared first on BroBible.

Now, the length of your life could come into question, considering how much Taco Bell you’ll be consuming in the next couple years if you’re lucky enough to the Eleven Everlasting Dollars challenge.

Taco Bell has released eleven dollar bills across America in celebration of the new Dollar Cravings Menu. They may look like regular dollars, but find one of these eleven serial numbers and you could win a lifetime of food from Taco Bell.

There is an interactive map to track the dollars and the cities they’re most likely to pop up in over the next few weeks but don’t think this is going to be an easy hunt —  the official rules explain that the chances of finding one of the eleven dollar bills are about 1 in 2.4 billion.

The post Here’s your chance to win free Taco Bell for life appeared first on BroBible.

8. Screwing With People’s Pets

Just because it would be theoretically awesome to share in your “high” jinx with the host’s dog doesn’t mean it’s okay to blow a puff of salvia in Pedro the Pomeranian’s face and then watch as he captures an unfortunate squirrel and makes it his love slave.

7. Not Offering Food

Back in college, the only thing people at a party wanted to eat was beer. But if you’re 25 or older, it’s almost criminal to throw one without offering decent snacks. Psst…I hear Goldfish and Swedish fish are pretty well regarded by drunk people. Anything fish-related that’s not actually fish, really.

6. Being Tied to Your Phone

You have your whole life to live to the fullest while glued to your phone. If you’re at a social gathering and you’ve got the means to stay, shall we say, well lubricated, there’s no excuse for incessant tagging, liking, posting and checking in.

5. Making Everyone Listen to Your Shitty Music

It doesn’t matter what kind of music you play, everyone is going to think it’s some degree of shitty because it isn’t coming from their own device or playlist. Still, if you’re not at least throwing your guests a bone by queuing up something they’ll enjoy here and there, you’re not doing your duty as a good host.

4. Stopping Someone Else’s Shitty Music

What can I say; music is a touchy subject. One man’s death metal is another man’s death. Still, stopping the playlist mid-song to play your own shit isn’t cool no matter how bad the music is. Consult the host, and ask when you might be able to inject some of your own refined flavor into the sonic ambiance of the evening. Only then, can you change things up from death metal to power metal.

3. All Couples

Have you ever rolled up to a party where it seems like the only people there are doe-eyed lovers? If you’re all coupled up, that’s probably fine with you. But if you’re not, the host has committed a most grievous party foul, and all is lost…unless of course there’s another party with people every bit as single as you are.

2. Bringing the Wrong Type of Booze

Ever heard of bringing a gun to a knife fight? Well that’s just as dangerous as bringing a bottle of wine to a beer party. You done fucked up, man. Go back out to the gas station, grab a few of their finest beverages of the 40 ounce varietal, and return as a respectable party guest.

1. Being Depressing

Parties are not an event for people to get together and tell sad stories. Can’t you just do that one-on-one with a friend? No? First step; get some friends.

Drunk guy image by Shutterstock
Compact discs image by Shutterstock
Depressing image by Shutterstock

The post 8 of the worst party fouls you might not even know you’re committing appeared first on BroBible.

If you’re not grilling on Labor Day, you’re a terrorist. Simple as that. Check out these 10 unique hot dog creations for the inspiration to take your party from gutter to butter. I’d recommend making almost all of them this weekend. Feel free to send leftovers my way.

With an Inferiority Complex

With Giada…

With the Other Other White Meat

Stuffed Inside a Pizza Crust

Stuffed Inside of Mac & Cheese Sushi

Stuffed in a Cheesy Corn Dog Cupcake

Spiral Cut

Like a College Kid

Wrapped in Bacon

And the final unique hot dog…

As Cakes Made With Booze

The post 10 awesomely unique hot dogs to make for Labor Day appeared first on BroBible.

Compared to your cubicle, a bathroom stall is amazing, so it doesn’t hurt to be prepared should your bi-hourly “excursions” to the rest room ever be questioned. [LINK]

The post 6 ways to justify your insanely long bathroom breaks at work appeared first on BroBible.

You can literally find tasty local brews in every state in America, but to determine who does it best here are all 50 states in the Union ranked according to their beer. [LINK]

The post Every state in the USA, ranked by its beer appeared first on BroBible.

I like Cinderella’s original car as much as the next guy, but it’s too early for orange fruit beer. Here are 15 fall seasonal craft beers you should be drinking instead of pumpkin beer. Now go use that extra day off for Labor Day to drink all 15.

Of course, like the awesome cocktails recipes shared yesterday, these fall seasonal craft beers have absolutely nothing to do with the labor movement. Holidays are just a great time to drink excessive amounts of beer.

Little Sumpin’ Wild – Lagunitas

It’s like a Little Sumpin’ Sumpin’ but with more booze. What’s not to like?

Foray – Deschutes

What would happen if Belgians gave up and started making IPAs? Here’s your answer.

Flipside Red IPA – Sierra Nevada

Tropical fruit and citrus. Sounds like summer; tastes like fall. How? Magic.*

Ten Fidy – Oskar Blues

This might be on shelves by now. It might not. It’s sorry for partying.

Mars: The Bringer of War – Bell’s

This DIPA is the first in Bell’s Planets Series. To be consumed only with epic music in background.*

Harvest Saison – Samuel Adams

Sam’s commercial says they make 974 different beers per year*, and this is one of my favorites.

Moonglow Weizenbock – Victory

Isn’t Moonglow a celebrity kid’s name?* It’s definitely a damn fine beer

Tour de Fall – New Belgium

Pale ale perfect for cycling enthusiasts and/or people who like to drink beer.

Tramonay Rouge – Saranac

Saison with grapes sources from NY. I’m pretty sure that makes it healthy, right?*

Double Trouble – Founders

9.4% DIPA will have you seeing double… especially if you suddenly find yourself upside down.

Tank 7 Farmhouse Ale – Boulevard Brewing

Actually a year-around beer, but tastes even better in the fall.

Bitches Brew – Dogfish Head

“If peeing in your pants is cool, consider me Miles Davis.”

Nosferatu – Great Lakes Brewing

Red Ale named after the earliest movie Dracula. It’s only in 4-packs, so you know it’s good.

Autumn Ale – Breckenridge

“Always straight to business, eh Morpheus?” That’s why I like you, Breckenridge.

Stone 18th Anniversary IPA – Stone Brewing Co.

Congrats on making it this far, Stone Brewing. Now get back to work. I can’t live without your beer.*

*Falsehood

Related to fall seasonal craft beer: 10 Most ‘Murica Beers.

The post 15 fall seasonal craft beers with absolutely no pumpkin! appeared first on BroBible.

Today, however, we’ve put together a collection of great wines (don’t worry, we’re skipping over the cloying Moscatos, boring Chardonnays and grocery store-quality Rosé’s) for your perusal. Let’s focus on a handful of tasty, classy bottles of the good stuff. Shall we?

7. Noble Vines Cabernet Sauvignon (2012)

This Cab smells of dark fruits, fresh herbs and coffee grounds with the taste of blackberries and black cherries along with hints of woodsey oak and the zest of fresh ground black pepper.

From: Lodi, California
ABV: Clocks in at a tidy 14.5%
Best paired with: Lean meats like roasted pork loin, baked chicken or grilled steak.
Suggested retail: $14.99

6. Fontodi Chianti Classico Riserva Vigna del Sorbo (2004)

This is a strong, acidic wine with a powerful taste of Chinese five spices, dark fruit, menthol, licorice and flowers that will best work with a rich, Italian meal.

From: The Chianti region of Italy
Best paired with: Comfort foods, Italian dishes such as pasta Bolognese or veal marsala.
Suggested retail: $69

5. Hogue Riesling Columbia Valley (2011)

The Riesling that emerges from the temperate soil of Washington’s Columbia Valley is known for its trademark summer fruit flavors. This one has the aromas of apricot, peaches, melon and citrus, all drizzled with honey. Tasting notes are a blend of tangerine and apricot with a crisp, mineral-like acidity.

From: Columbia Valley, Washington
ABV: A day-drinking appropriate alcohol content of 11.6%.
Best paired with: Mild grilled fish (such as grouper or halibut), spring rolls, seafood curries.
Suggested retail: $10

4. Gewurztraminer HUGEL (2012)

This is a foodies wine in the truest sense; it goes well with a range of foods of and both mild and strong flavor profiles from all over the world. Dry, but intensely aromatic, this Gewurztraminer smells and tastes of exotic fruits (lychee and passion fruit), and exotic spices (cardamom and saffron), as well as jasmine and rose.

From: The Alsace region of France
ABV: 14.1%
Pairs well with: Stiry fry, shellfish, white meats, game birds, curries, strong cheeses.
Suggested retail: $20

3. Graveyard Vineyard Shiraz (2011)

Medium-bodied and dry, yet sweet and tart with hints of bran, vanilla and oak, this fruity and complex wine is one of the most popular Hunter Valley, Australia variants out there. Perfect for a winter night’s dinner of slow-cooked meats and hearty vegetable stews.

From: Hunter Valley, Australia
ABV: Lucky number 13(%)
Pairs well with: Veal osso bucco, braised lamb shank, short ribs, stews.
Suggested retail price: $45

2. Bodegas O. Fournier Urban Ribera (2009)

This Urban Ribera is known for its deep purple color, floral, spicy and fruity bouquet, and tart, peppery, floral and juicy dark fruit taste. And the sheer amount of adjectives needed to describe it.

From: Ribera del Duero, Spain
ABV: 14%
Pairs well with: Roasted chicken, pork chops, gourmet pizza or a good burger.
Suggested retail price: $18.99

1. Sledgehammer El Gaucho Malbec (2012)

“El Gaucho” is inspired by the Argentinean Cowboy, and celebrated for a flavor that perfectly complements beef dishes. It has the aroma of both fruit and roasted game, with the taste of ripe, juicy fruit and blooming violets.

From: Mendoza, Argentina
ABV: 14%
Pairs well with: Beef chili, barbecued beef ribs, grilled steak.
Suggested retail: $9.99

Wine image by Shutterstock
Gewurztraminer HUGEL image: Boutique HUGEL
Sledgehammer El Gaucho Malbec image: Vivino

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I can’t recall when exactly the ‘Rocky Mountain Oyster’ came into my cultural lexicon, however, I remember very clearly the first time I visited Colorado and saw the Rocky Mountains for my first time. When I showed up I pretty much thought there’d be ‘Rocky Mountain Oysters’ on every menu, everywhere. That people living out West were thriving on a diet of testicles. How wrong I was….

I eventually tried a Rocky Mountain Oyster at some place down in S.FL, it was mostly forgettable, and that was a bit of a disappointment. Anyone have better reviews? Needs Sriracha?

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This is what $1,000 in rent gets you across the USA (Hint: NYC is brutal)

The post Taste testing testicles—finding out which animal balls taste the best appeared first on BroBible.

We love to share travel tips around here, but usually it’s about where to go to have fun, not die, so in the interest of your safety it might be wise to avoid these 25 most dangerous cities in the world. [LINK]

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Austin Beerworks just invented the first ever 99-pack of beer. This might be the greatest day in the history of drinking! And lest you think this is just a commercial, here’s what the brewery had to say.

LET’S BE CLEAR: IT’S REAL. Like, really real. Right now, as you read this, ice-cold 99-packs are waiting for you in select stores across Austin. To score one of these rare boxes of beauty, follow Austin Beerworks on Instagram, Twitter and Facebook for details.

If I didn’t have to continue typing these words, I’d be on my way to the airport right now. Sure I’d need to find some friends to help me carry the thing, but it seems like making friends is easy when you have a 99-pack of beer. Who wouldn’t like me?

It’s safe to say this is just promotional and that the 99-pack of beer isn’t here to stay. Beer stores just aren’t built for limbo beer cases. That’s poor planning on the store’s part, and we’re all forced to suffer due to their failure.

Here’s a short list of things you could do with a 99-pack of beer:

• Play 16.5 games of Beer Pong
• Do Power Hour 13.2 times
• Do Century Club 7.92 times
• Play 1 game of 99-person full-cup flip cup
• Act out the song 99 Bottles Cans of Beer on the Wall
• Create world peace

Peacemaker is the perfect choice for a 99-pack of beer because I’m pretty sure the violence in America would stop if corner had an elongated cooler holding a a 99-pack of beer.

The post Austin Beerworks introduces 99-pack of beer. Yes, 99 beers! appeared first on BroBible.

Cocktails aren’t the first thought when it comes to Labor Day. It’s the start of football season, and with it comes beer. For those who still operate under liquor is quicker though, here are a few cocktails to try this Labor Day. There’s absolutely nothing Labor Dayish about them, but I at least stuck with American booze because it’s our holiday.

Aviation Rickey

Gin isn’t just for the English and old people. Aviation is a new school, less juniper-forward gin made right here in the USA.

• 1.5oz Aviation Gin
• .75oz Fresh lime juice
• 1 tsp Simple syrup.
• Soda water

In Collins glass, add ice, spirits, and mixers.
Stir. Top with soda. Garnish with lime wedge.
Attempt to sip rather than gulp. Fail. Repeat.

The Brooklyn Cocktail

Brooklyn isn’t exactly a bastion of the labor movement, but it’s a damn good cocktail to usher in the fall.

• 2oz Wild Turkey Rye 101
• 1oz dry vermouth
• .25oz maraschino liqueur
• .25oz Amer Picon, or a few dashes Angostura or orange bitters

Combine ingredients with ice and stir until well-chilled. Strain into a chilled cocktail glass.

The Grackle

Cocktail by Marty Bohannon

Fernet is the official currency of bartenders. Pour yourself a shot as you make the cocktail.

• 1.5oz Tito’s Handmade Vodka
• .5oz Fernet Branca
• 2oz fresh squeezed blood orange juice

Pour orange juice over ice. Then add Tito’s Handmade Vodka and Fernet Branca.
Stir and serve with a cocktail straw.

Kentucky Champagne Cocktail

If you really want a working class hero, use Cook’s. If you want to wake up free of thoughts about trepanning… don’t.

• 1oz Makers Mark
• .5oz peach schnapps
• Dash angostura bitters
• Korbel Brut

In a mixing glass with ice, combine whiskey, schnapps and angostura.
Strain into a chilled champagne flute. Fill with champagne.

Knob Creek Smoke & Char

Recipe by Celebrity Chef Michael Symon

You don’t have much longer to eat fresh peaches so do it while you can. Throw one on the grill this weekend then drop a few slices in your drink.

• 2oz Knob Creek Smoked Maple Bourbon
• 1oz Fresh Lemon Juice
• .5oz Demerara Syrup
• 2 Slices of Charred Peaches
• 4 Large Basil Leaves

Char peaches slices on grill until nice grill marks appear.
Muddle charred peach slices with basil leaves.
Add all ingredients to a cocktail shaker with ice.
Shake and strain over fresh ice in a rocks glass.

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Aside from everything he debunks in this video, it’s important that you recognize just about any time you switch up your health/diet/exercise routine you’re going to see results, and that’s all that your b.s. gluten-free diet has done.

The people thinking gluten-free diets are life changers are the same ones who years ago were telling you how the South Beach diet or the Atkins diet were the only ways live your life….It’s all cyclical.

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These popular facts that you’ve been taught for years are complete bullsh-t

The post That gluten-free diet you’re on is bullsh-t, and here’s why appeared first on BroBible.

Fact: people in restaurants can be terrible so take a look at this handy guide to things that really get under the skin of your server… and then do the exact opposite. [LINK]

The post 16 ways you’re making your waiter/waitress hate you appeared first on BroBible.

According to Science journalist Adam Rogers, the author of Proof: The Science of Booze…

[Scientists] finally have a survey instrument that they can give somebody and assess, “You have a Level 9 hangover, and you have a Level 7 hangover,” and they finally started to see that overlap with both migraine and also an inflammatory response, so the kind of thing you would have if you had the flu — where you feel achy and you feel slow and your brain doesn’t work as fast and [you have] general malaise. Looking at that, they can go, “K, let’s see if in fact this is an inflammation.”

If you look at people with hangovers, the same markers in the blood that you would see with an inflammatory response, things like cytokines, for example — which are molecule[s] that the immune [system] uses to talk to itself — actually do seem elevated, and even better, you can induce what looks like a hangover by giving somebody those same molecules. … That’s good news because if you say, “Well, it’s an inflammatory response,” then maybe I can go with anti-inflammatory drugs, and we have those.

So, wait a second…the cure for a hangover is anti-inflammatory drugs? Like ibuprofen or acetaminophen? Dammit, I knew that. I’m a scientist!

H/T io9

Hangover guy image by Shutterstock

The post We may now FINALLY know what causes those dreaded hangovers appeared first on BroBible.

Sorry bro, but it’s time you take the hint. Stop wasting energy on women who aren’t really interested. The amount of emotional turmoil you put yourself through just isn’t worth it. [LINK]

The post 7 signs that she’s simply just not into you appeared first on BroBible.

There’s nothing wrong with a little gluttony, but there comes a point when you have to look at yourself in the mirror, wipe an entire frozen pizza’s worth of grease from your face, and own up to hitting rock bottom. [LINK]

The post Rock bottom eating habits: 40 signs that you’ve given up appeared first on BroBible.

Here’s the thing. I’ve been to Dave and Busters fewer times than I have Fallopian tubes. I love the idea of adult Chuck E. Cheese as much as the next guy who refuses to grow up, but I suck at winning tickets and there are bars in which arcade games are free. I figured that pretty much eliminated my need for the joint. I couldn’t have been more wrong. Here are 10 things I didn’t expect to see at Dave and Busters.

1. Go-go dancers

Sure they looked out of place, but who doesn’t love go-go dancers?

2. Brody Jenner DJ’ing

Doubly unexpected; the man’s not bad behind the decks.

3. An ice sculpture

It turns out it’s hot in LA, which makes a giant block of ice even more unlikely.

4. A huge bowl of shrimp cocktail

“We eat so many shrimp, I got iodine poisoning.” – Pimp C

5. The biggest Pac-Man ever

Finally multi-player Pac-Man without waiting for turns to end. You eat each other!

6. Pappy Van Winkle

Sure it’s just the 10-year Pappy, but it’s still one of the most sought after bourbons. Macallan 18 was stocked as well.

7. PlayStation 4

These aren’t your childhood prizes. Don’t worry, you can still get a Chinese Finger Trap.

8. Smoking hot women…everywhere

Apparently the Dave and Busters dress code is tight, fake-boob exposing dresses.

9. Ticket hoarders

It was a grand opening, so I was definitely not expecting to see people trying to win this year’s Christmas.

10. A step and repeat

I know it’s a grand opening, but I still didn’t expect a red orange carpet. Clearly I do not belong on one either.

10.5. ProActive vending machine

OK, so this wasn’t in Dave and Busters, but it was 3 doors down in the Hollywood Mall.

It turns out that Dave and Busters isn’t exactly what I expected it to be. They had a stellar chef serving gourmet food and decent cocktails for a high frequency bar. It has a sports bar within, which immediately gave me ideas for ways to kill halftime. And it all just seemed like one giant party. I went in the little expectations, but admittedly left impressed. Now if only I could figure out how the hell their game “credits” work. I swear it’s meant to confuse people into spending all of their money.

One thing I did expect to see:

Beer Pong

I played, and I dominated. They don’t call me DeadShot for nothing… or at all.

The post 10 things I never expected to see at Dave and Busters appeared first on BroBible.

When men want to fix their love lives, they need advice that’s just for them. That’s why Guyism.com is the go-to source. (Hey, they said it, not us.)

Amazingly though, it turns out that after five years of doing this stuff we actually HAVE put out some pretty decent advice. Head over there and check out what they found. It certainly can’t hurt, right? [LINK]

GO TO ARTICLE ON DATINGADVICE.COM

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