Happy Healthy Hip Parenting

Billie & The Parent Plan

sondra@happyhealthyhip.com (HIP_M0M) — Fri, 17 Jul 2009 14:34:00 +0000

I love reading books - every once in a while - to my son that are a little beyond his age range. Some people would say that it's not healthy to do so, but I find that talking about things that he doesn't know about or using words or ideas that are unfamiliar to him only provides us with starting points for some great discussions.

Billie and The Parent Plan is about a young girl who is upset with her mom for getting remarried. It turns out that her step-dad is old enough to be her grandfather and her 18-year-old step-sister is just another "adult" that Billie is not thrilled to all of a sudden be living with.

Her father was never around growing up and he wasn't discussed much in the book, but the entire premise of the book was about her having to get used to her new family and accepting these people into her home, which is something that many kids must deal with when (or if) their parents get remarried.

My son was not thrilled with this idea either. The thought of my getting married (someday) never crossed his mind and he was adamant about the fact that he was not OK with it. I wasn't going to argue with him or tell him that I was never going to get married but I have a feeling that talking about it now (as opposed to when - or if - that person comes along) will prepare him for it, if that day should ever come.

The book, by Ann Bryant, is a wonderful discussion-starter on bullying, peer pressure, and dealing with a new step-family. You can guarantee that if I ever do get remarried, my son will be so in love with the guy he'll either be our Best Man or he'll walk me down the aisle himself.

Check out more great books from Usborne and Kane Miller.

Thelma & Louise - Part 2

sondra@happyhealthyhip.com (HIP_M0M) — Thu, 16 Jul 2009 20:37:00 +0000

Our Chevy vehicle will be delivered next Monday. They promised me it would be dropped off to me between 11 am - 1 pm. I hope it's not like when the Cable Guy promises to be there within a certain time frame. They're notoriously late and even though I'm driving on my own, I do like to have a schedule to follow. (Those of you who know me are laughing right now because I am notoriously late.)

Sugar Jones is relying on me to pick her up in Denver on Tuesday so I'll have to haul butt to get there before the day is over. We're going to spend the night downtown (Is there anything going on in downtown Denver on a Tuesday night?) and our plan is to be in Chicago by the night of the 22nd or early morning on the 23rd. That is if we don't get arrested for disorderly conduct or disturbing the peace along the way. Have you read those weird state laws in Iowa?

Feel free to follow along via the BlogHer website, our own personal blogs (Happy Healthy Hip Parenting and Sugar in the Raw). We'll also be updating the Twitter feed along with our own (@sugarjones, @hip_m0m) and Whrrl along the way!

According to Google maps, it's a 2,062 mile drive, which should take us approximately 30 hours total. We plan on driving 15 hours per day so here's our estimated route:

Monday, July 20th
Depart San Diego, CA
(overnight in Las, Vegas)

Tuesday, July 21st
Stop in Denver, CO

Wednesday, July 22nd
Arrive in Chicago, IL

For those of you who live along the route, help us out! Let us know where we should stop for food, restroom breaks or if we can come over for a home-cooked meal!

To check out the other carpools heading to Chicago, follow the Interactive Map to see where the Seattle group is or The Blogrollers from Atlanta!

Breast Cancer Patient Protection Act

sondra@happyhealthyhip.com (HIP_M0M) — Wed, 15 Jul 2009 21:04:00 +0000

Proposed Mastectomy Law Change

(written by a surgeon)

I'll never forget the look in my patients' eyes when I had to tell them they had to go home with the drains, new exercises and no breast. I remember begging the doctors to keep these women in the hospital longer, only to hear that they would, but their hands were tied by the insurance companies.

So there I sat with my patient giving them the instructions they needed to take care of themselves, knowing full well they didn't grasp half of what I was saying, because the glazed, hopeless, frightened look spoke louder than the quiet 'Thank you' they muttered.

A mastectomy is when a woman's breast is removed in order to remove cancerous breast cells/tissue. If you know anyone who has had a mastectomy, you may know that there is a lot of discomfort and pain afterwards. Insurance companies are trying to make mastectomies an outpatient procedure. Let's give women the chance to recover properly in the hospital for 2 days after surgery.

This Mastectomy Bill is in Congress now. It takes 2 seconds to do this and is very important. Please take the time and do it really quick! The Breast Cancer Hospitalization Bill is important legislation for all women.

Please send this to everyone in your address book. If there was ever a time when our voices and choices should be heard, this is one of those times. If you're reading this, it's because I think you will take the 30 seconds to go to vote on this issue and send it on to others you know who will do the same.

There's a bill called the Breast Cancer Patient Protection Act which will require insurance companies to cover a minimum 48-hour hospital stay for patients undergoing a mastectomy. It's about eliminating the 'drive-through mastectomy' where women are forced to go home just a few hours after surgery, against the wishes of their doctor, still groggy from anesthesia and sometimes with drainage tubes still attached.

Lifetime Television has put this bill on their web page with a petition drive to show your support.. Last year over half the House signed on. PLEASE! sign the petition by clicking on the web site below. You need not give more than your name and state and zip code number.

http://www.mylifetimecom/community/my-lifetime-commitment/breast-cancer/petition/breast-cancer-petition

This takes about 2 seconds.

PLEASE PASS THIS ON to your family & friends.

THANK YOU!

What's for lunch?

sondra@happyhealthyhip.com (HIP_M0M) — Tue, 14 Jul 2009 14:52:00 +0000

I don't know about you, but whenever I see a cute lunchbox, I have to buy one. For me, handbags & clutch purses are an addiction like no other. Just like shoes, one needs to accessorize whenever and however possible so a lot of us ladies require purses of all different shapes, colors, sizes and even material. I think it's safe to say that for us, lunchboxes fall into this same category.

Metal, insulated or plastic; they come in designs and styles to suit even the fussiest of eaters!

Sugar Daddy Lunchbox ($13)
(OK, this one's really for me!)

Dump Truck Lunch Box ($15)

Star Wars: Clone Wars ($13)

Hannah Montana Lunchbox ($10)

Yo Gabba Gabba Lunchbox ($14)

Chinese Take-Out Lunchbox ($19)

This might just be my new addiction!

Did someone say roadtrip?!

sondra@happyhealthyhip.com (HIP_M0M) — Mon, 13 Jul 2009 18:04:00 +0000

The craziest thing about my upcoming roadtrip to Chicago is that it was someone else's idea. I don't want to take complete credit for this adventure I'm about to take! You see, originally Caryn, of Rockin' Mama, invited me to join in for the ride. She convinced me to drive from beautiful San Diego to the Windy City and I somehow jumped on the opportunity. She had also asked Amanda, of Mommy Mandy, to accompany us and everything was all set (not in stone, however).

Things happen for a reason, and with Caryn's pregnancy and Mandy's plans changing, I'm now driving on my own to Denver, where I'll pick up Sugar Jones. It's bound to get crazy after that!

Even though we're not taking the kids on this trip (maybe next time), there are many families heading out on the road this summer. Here's some great activities, toys and games that would help keep the kiddos occupied on a long car ride (no batteries required):

USA Map Pillowcase ($25)
www.colormecompany.com

Kid Kase ($60)
www.theactivechild.com

Lap Doodle Board ($15)
http://www.gingersnapskids.com/write01.html

Road Games 1– Sound Effects CD ($10)

Klutz Kids Travel: A Backseat Survival Kit ($14)
www.klutz.com

Klutz Road Trip Trivia ($13)
www.klutz.com

Kids' Interstate Road Atlas ($5)
www.fatbraintoys.com

Happy Travels!

Everything I Need to Know I Learned from a Children's Book

sondra@happyhealthyhip.com (HIP_M0M) — Fri, 10 Jul 2009 17:40:00 +0000

I love this time of year, when all of my favorite publishers release their Fall catalogs and I get a sneak preview at all of the wonderful books that are going to be released over the coming months. Here's a quick list of children's books that are recently published or forthcoming titles by Macmillan Children's Publishing Group:

Everything I Need to Know I Learned from a Children’s Book
Anita Silvey

How I Learned Geography
Uri Shulevitz

The Little Dump Truck
Margery Cuyler

Mighty Casey
Matthew Cordell

Machines Go to Work
William Low

Jeremy Draws a Monster
Peter McCarty

The Surrender Tree
Margarita Engle

Into the Wild Nerd Yonder
Julie Halpern

In the Path of Falling Objects
Andrew Smith

The Espressologist
Kristina Springer

One Boy
Laura Vaccaro Seeger

Claudette Colvin
Phillip Hoose

Honk, Honk, Goose!
April Pulley Sayre

While in Chicago...

sondra@happyhealthyhip.com (HIP_M0M) — Thu, 09 Jul 2009 11:53:00 +0000

Even though I'm heading to Chicago without my child in a few weeks, I'm looking forward to the day when he is old enough to handle all-day trips to museums and explore the many sites that the Windy City has to offer.

For those of you who are bringing kids to BlogHer, or who plan on taking them to Chicago someday, here's a list of just some of the things that you will want to make time for:

Do you live in Chicago? Have you taken your kids there recently? Let us know what your favorite sights are or better yet, where to find family-friendly restaurants throughout the city.

Wordless Wednesday

sondra@happyhealthyhip.com (HIP_M0M) — Wed, 08 Jul 2009 21:14:00 +0000

From our 4th of July celebration:

DriveHer

sondra@happyhealthyhip.com (HIP_M0M) — Wed, 08 Jul 2009 07:29:00 +0000

So, you know when you tell your kids that they're driving you crazy? I say that often and usually my son knows I'm joking and he'll say the same thing to me when he's in a silly mood. Lately, though, I've been thinking about the whole driving thing and how I'm about to head out on a roadtrip in a few weeks that'll take me over 2,000 miles - without my son. Now, that's crazy!

Even though my BlogHer trip is not (yet) sponsored, it is, sort of. You see, Chevy, the carpool sponsor, will be providing me with a brand-spanking-new Chevy Tahoe Hybrid to drive from my house here in San Diego to the Sheraton in Chicago. They may even be able to provide the 2010 Chevy Equinox if it arrives in time! Either way, I'm taking a much-needed bathroom break in Denver to pick up my dear friend and fellow San Diegan, Sugar Jones!

The last time I drove halfway across the country was when my friend from college convinced me to move to San Diego ten years ago. I had never even stepped foot in California before, but there was a lot of drama going on in my life at the time and I really needed a change of scenery.

I knew nothing about San Diego, other than what I had heard about the perfect weather and beautiful beaches. Is there really anything else you need to know after growing up in Minnesota?!

My friend's sister joined us on the road trip and we had a blast, stopping in Breckenridge, Denver and Albuquerque along the way. We had so many crazy experiences, met a lot of cool people and spent a lot longer on the road that we had originally anticipated.

I love Chicago. I used to drive there with my friends for the weekend during college. We'd check out the museums during the day and hit up the bars at night. I don't know when we ever slept, but I have a feeling BlogHer is going to be pretty much the same. Seriously, we'll all be partying like it's 1999!

Looking Forward

sondra@happyhealthyhip.com (HIP_M0M) — Tue, 07 Jul 2009 14:09:00 +0000

As a single mom, it's hard at times to find others that I am able to confide in when it comes to talking about the butterflies that I experience and nervous excitement that I have before a date or when I meet someone who I’m attracted to. It's not often that it happens so it's during the dry spells that I'm there as a confidante, therapist and friend to others. I’m there for those seeking comfort, looking for someone who can listen and understand what they're going through.

I'm there for my friends who have either given up on love or are still trying to comprehend the relationships - and mistakes - from their past. My entire life has been dedicated to helping and listening to others. I'm a great listener. I don't think there's anyone that knows me that would tell you otherwise. Which is why, at times, I really feel the need to unleash and spill my guts to those who can also understand and who listen to me as I provide way too much information about an escapade that I've encountered or complain about a dry spell that's gone on for far too long.

Often, I spend my time online visiting the sites and blogs of other single parents - both moms and dads - who have encountered the same issues that I have. The Single Parents Connection on Facebook has a growing list of blogs dedicated to single parents. I'm honored to be included among such honest and humorous writers.

Prior to my divorce, I was the mom who worked over 50 hours a week, feeling guilty about not being there for my son, missing out on so much as he grew up and changed in the blink of an eye while I built my career, being the breadwinner and putting all of my energy into my job, not realizing that I was neglecting my husband and child at the same time.

We all make sacrifices for our family and there is always a choice to be made. Seeing the other side of it now, the work-at-home mom who wants to provide for her child, who has so much to offer and supply as a nurturing, sympathetic caregiver who wishes she could turn back time.

There’s also another side to that. I also need and crave that female energy, the bond that has brought women together for centuries, which is maybe one of the main reasons why I’m so looking forward to attending my first BlogHer conference.

I have met so many great and inspiring women in this lifetime. I have been lucky enough to have sat with some brilliant individuals, learning so much as they guide me and help me learn from, not only their mistakes, but teach me to learn from my own.

If you’re attending BlogHer in just a few weeks, drop me a line, let me know what you’re most looking forward to (be honest) and what your concerns are. I know a lot of people are worried that it’ll be like high school again. Cliques and popularity contests is not something I would want to experience again, but I also know that the bonds that have been created by women – either online or meeting in person in the past – are hard to break.

I hope to meet many new friends and have a chance to really listen to what everyone has to say. I do my best work that way.

Summer Vacation

sondra@happyhealthyhip.com (HIP_M0M) — Mon, 06 Jul 2009 16:35:00 +0000

School's out for the summer so last week was spent keeping busy with my son and enjoying the beautiful San Diego weather. Last Monday, we met Sugar Jones and her little sugar cubes and spent the day at Legoland!

The kids had a blast, although there were some rides that we had to skip since the lines were so long. One of the first rides the kids wanted to go on had a sign out front that read:

120 Minute Wait Time

There were people actually walking in to wait in this line and I couldn't believe it. I thought it had to be a joke, but I wasn't about to go stand in line to find out so we never did make it on the Sky Cruiser that day...

During our lunch break, my son studied the map so he could make sure we didn't miss out on the Indiana Jones ride that is his all-time favorite.

I don't recall seeing the sign out front about how long the wait was, but it felt like 45 minutes or so. Definitely worth the wait though. The boys had a blast shooting at the targets inside and Sugar nearly peed her pants when the "falling" building came close to us. She has some great video footage from that day so you'll have to visit her site to check it out.

As seen in Baby Couture

sondra@happyhealthyhip.com (HIP_M0M) — Mon, 29 Jun 2009 14:32:00 +0000

The summer issue of Baby Couture arrived the other day. Tori & Dean along with their adorable tots appear on the cover. An article - and photos - of Scott Baio's family can be found inside, along with many hip and haute fashions for infants and toddlers. Here's just a small sample of the clothing lines found in this Special Anniversary Issue (for kids and adults):

Agatha Ruiz de la Prada
Bambino Mio
Kelty
Micro Me
L'ovedbaby
Cutie and Patootie
Go Green Lunchbox
Scout Baby
Heidi Merrick
Kate Quinn Organics
Baby Eggi
Bonafide Craftworks
Creative Recreation
Sand Cassel Kids by Goorin
Right Bank Babies
Designer's Touch by Baby Deer
The Big Citizen
Girlfriends by Anita G.
Ports 1961
Auriella Maternity
James Perse (creator of my favorite cotton clothing)
Sanuk (my favorite shoes/sandals)
Da Lil Guys
Baby Nay
Childish
Lola et Moi

Of course, the cutest clothes in the Tori Spelling article were from her own line of baby clothes, Little Maven, available in department stores and boutiques this fall!

You or your child can upload a photo to the Baby Couture editors for a chance at modeling in an upcoming issue! Head over to their website to register.

Book Review: Handle with Care

sondra@happyhealthyhip.com (HIP_M0M) — Sat, 27 Jun 2009 16:33:00 +0000

I bought Handle with Care several months ago, but for some reason, I got distracted (with other books) and didn't pick it up again until I got on the airplane last week. I brought it with me to my sister's house, thinking I might actually have time to read between hanging out with her and my parents and the three boys (my son and 2 nephews).

I finally was able to start reading it again in the jacuzzi bathtub that my parents finally invited me to use for the first time. They've lived in their place now for over four years and it took my son having a jacuzzi bath for them to offer me the same opportunity, but I digress.

The bulk of the book was read on the plane ride back home. My son is an amazing traveler, closing his eyes just after take off and opening them again two hours later, with enough time for me to complete the last half of this emotionally charged book by Jodi Picoult.

There's many controversial stories inside Picoult's novels, with heart-wrenching stories and endearing characters who are given their own voice in her books.

The many characters in this novel deal with disabilities, divorce, eating disorders, abortion and adoption. Jodi does a fabulous job, once again, covering the many sides to each story, giving every one of the characters a unique voice whom I believe all readers will be able to relate to on some level. She carries out this thought-provoking and heartbreaking story with an ending like no other. Actually, the ending wasn't really surprising to me, since it mimics the ending of another story of Picoult's. I won't say which one, but fans will have to let me know if you agree or disagree if or when you read this one.

Discussion questions for book clubs can be found on the official Jodi Picoult website, along with information, reviews and interviews.

My Sister's Keeper is out in theaters this week. I highly encourage you to read the book if you haven't already. It's one of my favorites.

You know it's bad when you start dipping into your kid's piggy bank

sondra@happyhealthyhip.com (HIP_M0M) — Fri, 26 Jun 2009 01:25:00 +0000

So, I've been on "funemployed" since the beginning of the year and guess what? The fun is starting to run out. That's right. My last unemployment check arrives next month and I'm starting to bite my nails and desperately search the couch for loose change.

Luckily, my ex-husband is digging into his pockets to help us out, starting next month, after all, he's partly responsible for putting us into this financial sinkhole since our divorce nearly bankrupted me. Needless to say, I did make some not-so-smart choices when it came to money so I can't really put the blame on anyone else.

My son and I have been making some big changes this year in the way we spend our time (with less money) so this experience has been a major lesson for the both of us about finances and how our lives can be full and rich without the big balance in our checking account.

Now, if only I can get him to start selling lemonade or something else equally adorable. I read an article last week about a mom and daughter who bought a van and converted it into an ice cream truck. Now that sounds like an awesome part-time job...

Feeling Homesick

sondra@happyhealthyhip.com (HIP_M0M) — Mon, 22 Jun 2009 16:26:00 +0000

I'm visiting my family & friends this week in Minnesota, celebrating many different things, including the wedding of my college friends, my nephew's first birthday and of course, Father's Day.

It's always a whirlwind of a trip whenever we come, trying to cram in as many family visits as possible and squeeze in as many happy hours with friends. One thing I've really been reminded of this time is how precious family truly is

My parents have been keeping an eye on my son while I get some work done (like right now) and my sister and her husband took on an extra child for the night while I enjoyed the wedding and reception of my friends of nearly 15 years.

For those of you who have parents or in-laws close by, be grateful for them, even if there are things they do or say that you might not agree with

I'll miss my family when we get back to our house, but as they say, "Home is where your Mom is" and even though my son is a little homesick now (missing California), my version of being homesick is a little different and I'll miss my family and friends when I return to our place and lives in Southern California

Luckily, my mom and I have discussed having her a bit more involved long-distance, which means she'll be writing on this blog on occasion, offering some grandmotherly advice and providing some great stories about her own childhood and how parenting has changed now that she's a grandmother.

Stay tuned for more...

Father Knows Best

sondra@happyhealthyhip.com (HIP_M0M) — Fri, 19 Jun 2009 15:50:00 +0000

Father's Day is right around the corner. We always buy books for each other in our family, and I especially enjoyed David Lyon's book, Father Knows Best, filled with hundreds of quotes from celebrity dads, sports figures and every day heroes known as Papa, Dad of Old Man.

The Happy Healthy Hip Parenting bookstore is full of reading recommendations for parenthood, from humorous collections to memoirs and those for grandparents, single parents and more. New books are added on a regular basis so be sure to stop back often.

If there's a book or category you'd like to see added, please feel free to leave a comment here or contact us directly.

Ways to Say "No!"

sondra@happyhealthyhip.com (HIP_M0M) — Tue, 16 Jun 2009 21:27:00 +0000

Saying “no” to a child can be difficult. Sometimes we end up feeling like a broken record that says “no” all the time. This can be wearing on us. Children stop listening when we repeat the same response. They may even stop asking altogether but we want our children to continue to come to us and ask our permission, especially as they get into the tween years!

1. "That’s not an option."
2. "I am unwilling to..."
3. "That’s not appropriate."
4. "I am not ready for you to do that yet."
5. Ask, “What do you think you would need to do before I would be willing to say yes to that."
6. Ask, “What do you think? Is this a good choice for you?”(If you choose to use this, make sure you are willing to abide by their answer.
7. For a youngster who has something you don’t want her to have said, “That’s not a toy. However, this is a toy you can play with."
8. Ask, “What are your other options?”
9. "No, I would be willing to..."
10. "I appreciate your asking, however..."
11. “Walls are not for coloring. Here is a piece of paper.”
12. Tell them what to do instead i.e., “Water needs to stay in the tub.”
13. "This is not negotiable."
14. "Yes, as soon as (task) is done."
15. "I'd love to, but now's not an option, let's go put it on the calendar."
16. “How about…?”
17. "Why don’t we…?”

For more resources and articles for parents, visit our website and sign up for our weekly newsletter.

All Our Children

sondra@happyhealthyhip.com (HIP_M0M) — Fri, 12 Jun 2009 18:21:00 +0000

by Steve Goodier

There are few things in this life more difficult to experience than the loss of one's child. Jim Wallis, in Who Speaks for God, tells about a sad and terrifying incident that occurred during the tragic war in Sarajevo not too many years back. A reporter who was covering the violence in the middle of the city saw a little girl fatally shot by a sniper. The reporter threw down his pad and pencil and rushed to the aid of a man who was now holding the child. He helped them both into his car and sped off to a hospital.

"Hurry, my friend," the man urged, "my child is still alive." A moment or two later he pleaded, "Hurry, my friend, my child is still breathing." A little later he said, "Hurry, my friend, my child is still warm."

When they got to the hospital, the young girl was gone. "This is a terrible task for me," the distraught man said to the reporter. "I must go tell her father that his child is dead. He will be heartbroken." The reporter was amazed. He looked at the grieving man and said, "I thought she was YOUR child." The man replied, "No, but aren't they all our children?"

Aren't they all our children? Those who live under our roof and those who reside with another family? Those to whom we are related as well as those whom we have never known?

Aren't they all our children? Those on our side of the border as well as those on the other side? Those of our nation no more or less than those of another?

Aren't they all our children? Those who worship like us and those who worship differently? Those who look like us and those who do not?

Aren't they all our children? The well-educated and the under-educated? The well- fed and the under-fed? Those who are secure and those who are at risk?

Aren't they all our children? Aren't they all our responsibility? ALL of them? Ours to nurture? Ours to protect? Ours to love?

I don't think it is an exaggeration to say that the survival of our world hinges on the answer to that question. To say they are NOT all our children is to condemn the world to more struggle – family against family, group against group, nation against nation.

Aren't they all our children? If we say yes, can we ever again pit them against each other? "If we have no peace," said Mother Teresa, "it is because we have forgotten that we belong to each other."

Aren't they all our children? There may be no greater question for our generation. And how we answer that question will determine the shape of our world for years to come.

Creating a Healthy Lifestyle

sondra@happyhealthyhip.com (HIP_M0M) — Tue, 09 Jun 2009 18:58:00 +0000

I've been lucky enough to work with the wonderful people at the Y.O.U. Consulting Group for the last several months and they've allowed me to take a new approach with The Ultimate Life Tool, giving me the go-ahead to bring this technology to the online world through UStream.

Tomorrow, and every Wednesday night, a Certified Practitioner will host an online Test Drive of this assessment tool and you get a chance to have a FREE session to learn a little bit more about you, your energy levels and how The Ultimate Life Tool can benefit you.

Whether it's your personal life or business relationships that you're looking to enhance, we can help! Head over to the YCG website and complete the survey by using the code USTREAM after entering in your personal information. You'll be assigned to me and I'll be going over your results tomorrow, LIVE, during our half-hour program, or if we don't have time, we'll go over it on another episode.

Each week we'll have a different topic so be sure to check back each and every Wednesday night at 7pm (PST). Here are the dates and the themes for the upcoming shows:

June 10 Living a Healthy Lifestyle
June 17 The "Interval"
June 24 Grieving
July 1 Finding your Maximum Attraction
July 8 Dealing with a Toxic Boss

I look forward to sharing this wisdom and knowledge with you as you gain a greater understanding of you and the people in your lives.

Tori and Dean

sondra@happyhealthyhip.com (HIP_M0M) — Wed, 03 Jun 2009 17:33:00 +0000

Several months ago, I interviewed Tori Spelling here in San Diego when she was in town for the Mother Goose Parade. The night before the annual event, the stars appeared at the W Hotel for a VIP media event where we were able to chat with the celebrities and I was lucky enough to grab Tori for an interview.

Since she's written a few books about her life as a mom in Hollywood (sTORITelling and Mommywood) and appears with her husband and two children in their latest reality TV show, I took advantage and asked her a few questions about her life as a Mom and, of course, how she lost so much weight after her second child.

I never was able to obtain the footage of that interview, or it would've appeared on this site by now. The TV crew from her Tori and Dean show follows her every move, so they captured the interview and wouldn't you know it? Footage from our conversation appeared on their show last night.

I was able to see a few clips from the show online, and noticed the challenges that they're experiencing. If anyone has a way to connect with Tori and Dean, please let them know that my services are available. Balancing work and family life is always a challenge and that's why I offer to help support parents by honoring their families and work with them to enrich their relationships.

I wasn't able to catch the show last night, so if anyone can provide me with access to it, I'd love to see how ridiculous I look (after the camera adds 10 pounds). UPDATE: Here's the video sneak preview. I'm shown 18 seconds in...for about 2 seconds!

By the way, Tori was awesome to chat with and was very sweet. I'm excited to have my fifteen minutes of fame alongside her and look forward to finally seeing that episode for myself.

The Prop 8 Debate

sondra@happyhealthyhip.com (HIP_M0M) — Tue, 26 May 2009 21:33:00 +0000

Here in California, the Supreme Court ruled to uphold the Prop 8 decision against same-sex marriages. I was truly saddened by this although I'm thrilled that the thousands of couples who were married during the "legal" time period are still holding valid marriage licenses. Surely, this is a sign that the debate over this issue is far from over.

My dear friend, Sugar Jones, over at Sugar in the Raw, mentioned Prop 8 in her wonderful post on Freedom and Independence today, which got me thinking...

Prop 8 is an issue regarding same-sex marriage, which in my opinion, has nothing to do with religion. Sugar did point out and it's not hard to see that many Christian groups are strongly against same-sex marriage and have helped to make this a religious debate after all, claiming that marriage was originally deemed as a religious ceremony between a man and woman and should not be redefined.

In my opinion, the Prop 8 issue is a legal debate, one of equal rights. Eliminating the same rights for same-sex couples goes against many of the same beliefs that Christians hold, like the Golden Rule - "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you." If we examine the request of those who want to have the same rights that opposite sex couples have had since the beginning of time, isn't it easy to see that the heterosexual lifestyle will not be affected by allowing same-sex couples to marry? I can't see how anything would change if same-sex marriage is allowed, except, perhaps, for the change in our economy.

Before I continue, I do have to say that I grew up in a Catholic household. Both of my parents grew up Catholic and raised my sister and I with the same beliefs. We attended Catholic schools from kindergarten - high school. That's right, I have never attended a public school unless you count college, and my ex-husband and I send our son to an independent school also, but that's beside the point.

When our son was born, we didn't even think twice about having him baptized. It was simply something that everyone (in our family) did and we celebrated the event with friends and family. I brought my son to church a few times, but the very last time I stepped inside a Catholic church (with the exception of a few weddings and baptisms), was when I sat through a sermon where the priest spoke of homosexuals in such an offensive and degrading way that I felt sick to my stomach and vowed to never again step foot inside that church, or any other church who considered homosexuals second class citizens, sinners, or compared them to pedophiles.

I know many couples, men and women who are in a same-sex relationship. Many of them have kids (biological or adopted) and I have a great deal of respect for each and every one of them.

Not that long ago, bi-racial marriages were illegal and schools were segregated so that children of different colors would not be in the same classrooms together. Does no one see the correlation here between segregating marriage in a similar fashion?

Our culture and our world is evolving, every day. To say that our definition of marriage cannot evolve along with society is not only ignorant, but dangerous. Children today are learning so much from adults and practicing what we preach to them. Do we want our kids to grow up in fear or hateful towards people who are different than us or do we want to teach peace, respect and equality?

I want my son to grow up to believe what he chooses to believe, not what I tell him to believe, and I truly hope that he will grow up in a world that has evolved, not only in thought but in practice.

San Diego Zoo's Unforgettable Elephant Odyssey

sondra@happyhealthyhip.com (HIP_M0M) — Sun, 24 May 2009 04:47:00 +0000

Last night, The San Diego Zoo held a VIP Event for the grand opening of the Elephant Odyssey exhibit. I had the pleasure of touring the new 7.5 acre display with fellow San Diego bloggers. It was a great event and a beautiful exhibit.

The event started at 5pm. We enjoyed some yummy cookies prior to taking the Sky Ride over to the exhibit, which is on the far end of the 100-acre zoo. We arrived at the entrance of the Elephant Odyssey and picked up a Pink Elephant (alcoholic for us, non-alcoholic for our kids, of course) which made it somewhat awkward for taking pictures, but somehow, we managed!

Somewhere along the way, I put our drinks down and I'm not quite sure which one my son ended up finishing, but he did end up having a crying fit moments later when he realized how hungry he was (Oh yeah, we sort of need to eat dinner!).

I got a few photos in prior to that, of the elephants enjoying their new play area, a baby crocodile which my son was frightened of, and the tapirs - adults and babies - enjoying the sunshine.

We cut through the Conrad Prebys Elephant Management Facility to sit down for some food outside the new Sabertooth Grill. Food was all my son needed to keep us going for the rest of the night. We all had dinner together and then my son ran around the Pleistocene Playground with Sugar's kids once the sun went down.

The event ended at 9 when the Zoo officially closed and we jumped aboard the top level of the double-decker bus to be dropped off right in front of the Exit. We walked to our car, said goodbye to our friends and then - major drama - my son discovered that he left his blanket and the stuffed elephant we were given at the beginning of the night, all the way back where we were seated for dinner! Seriously?!

From Left to Right: @BridgetASmith, @Hip_M0M, @tjstaab, @sugarjones
@sandiegomomma, @adramaticmommy, @VirtuelIMC

I hesitated between teaching him a lesson (leaving it behind) and knowing how upset he was because he doesn't go anywhere without his security blanket (picture Linus from Peanuts). After a few tears (his, not mine), we ran back to the entrance so I could explain to the staff why we so desperately needed to to back inside.

They were so understanding and in seconds, we were seated on a golf cart which the security guard drove - the back way - to the elephant display so we could retrieve my son's beloved blankie. He clung to me the entire time as we zipped through the zoo in the dark, no one around except the animals and the noises of the night. It was a beautiful drive and I enjoyed seeing the zoo in silence although my son was having a mini panic attack next to me.

The security guard who drove us there escorted us back to the "scene of the crime" and my son had to run to keep up with us since we were walking so quickly for his little legs. As soon as we got to the tables where we were previously sitting, my son crawled underneath the table and pulled out his blanket which he had stuffed up underneath the legs of the table (these photos proved the fact that he disappeared under there long enough to take several pics of the table legs and the napkin that fell on the ground).

Overall, the lasting memory of the event will be a traumatic one for my son since he nearly lost his blanket, but for me, I will remember how wonderful the staff was, how great we were treated and the laughs shared with some fabulous women.

Food & Relationships

sondra@happyhealthyhip.com (HIP_M0M) — Fri, 22 May 2009 17:53:00 +0000

I was talking to some of my single mom friends the other day about relationships. This was during lunch, of course, and one of the women - who is a bit older and much wiser - started talking about how we tend to view relationships the same way in which we view food.

Now, I know this sounds crazy but bear with me. She had a good point, in that she tends to eat two big meals a day, starving herself in between and not snacking or thinking about food until her body's ready to have a meltdown. Interestingly enough, her boyfriend lives out of state so she sees him every other weekend, spending time with him 24/7 for those few days before returning to her "normal life" and focusing on what needs to be done here before she's able to see him again.

Others I know tend to eat only at fine restaurants and spend a lot of money on organic foods, not allowing themselves to step foot inside a fast food restaurant or eating diet soda, or anything else unnatural. They know what they want - the finer things in life - and damn it, the men in their lives know it too!

Another friend of mine eats small snacky foods all day, healthy or not. She also likes to date many men at one time, not really ready to commit just yet to a full meal, so to speak.

And then there's me. Now, I have interesting eating habits which change from time to time and that could be also true of the relationships I have. Sometimes, I'll be really healthy and eat foods that are good for me (dating men who bring out my strengths and can recognize who I am) while there have certainly been times in my life where my eating habits have been horrible. Times when I'd eat junk food and drink way too much, and guess what? The men in my life at those times were also not good for me and drank way too much as well.

Nothing's wrong with any of the above scenarios although you can certainly see how some situations are not as good for us as others. We're all different, thank goodness, and needing different things, and people, in our lives. The point here isn't to try to change how you eat or who you date, but to just be aware.

If you're in a healthy relationship and are putting healthy foods into your body, chances are you can see how this affects you. Take a look at your relationships and the way you eat to determine what changes you could make, in either department, to make sure you are treating yourself to the best that's available.

Happy eating!

About Last Night

sondra@happyhealthyhip.com (HIP_M0M) — Fri, 22 May 2009 16:49:00 +0000

I'm not sure what happened this last week. It was all such a whirlwind, trying to get everything ready for the 2nd Annual Parenting Party last night.

My dearest friends came to support me and I met some fantastic moms and dads that are passionate about parenting so the event was a success and everyone who came had a great time.

Just to re-cap the night, here are the great sponsors and advertisers who made the event possible and who offered some fabulous giveaways to those who attended:

I do have some Goodie Bags leftover if anyone wants one! I'll be bringing them to the upcoming events to hand out, such as Baby Time Expo and BlogHer (if there's any left by then).

Now back to our regularly scheduled programming...

Amazing Grace

sondra@happyhealthyhip.com (HIP_M0M) — Sat, 16 May 2009 02:26:00 +0000

The one complaint I have about Finding Grace, by Donna VanLiere, is that there wasn't an index highlighting the many brilliant minds mentioned throughout the book. Quoting authors, poets, philosophers, and even the Bible, VanLiere's literary education is quite impressive. The best quotes though, in my opinion, are from VanLiere herself:

"Sometimes we need to be reminded why we're here, that we are valued and loved, and at the end of the pain there are still deeper and higher dreams to discover."

"The mysterious yet wonderful attribute of grace is that it is never earned or deserved, and it will never be forced upon anyone - it can only be received."

VanLiere's memoir is at once heartbreaking and inspiring. Her story starts when, as a young girl growing up in Ohio, she is sexually abused. Through this experience and many others in her life, Donna manages to find grace with each new challenge she is faced with.

The author's search for herself never fails to amuse as she uses humor to sail through the difficulties presented to her.

"No matter what you're going through, you can be assured of advice from stupid people."

Reading this book brought me to many different places from my own childhood, growing up in the Midwest, learning - too early - about sexuality, and questioning what it means to trust.

I started reading this book in the morning one day and found myself returning to it again and again, finishing the last page close to midnight that same night. There is something so transforming about reading this book that I definitely recommend setting aside a full day to absorb the intensity of the emotional roller coaster found within.

Finding Grace is so much more than about sexual abuse, becoming a mother or adoption. It's about discovering the meaning of life and understanding its joys and disappointments. VanLiere's book is both disturbing and comforting, touching readers in a way that will have them looking inwards and realizing that grace can be found in every situation.

"We arrange our lives to alleviate disappointment, frustration, dissatisfaction, and pain, viewing them as enemies of our soul. But are they always bad? Can't disappointment and broken dreams actually be good if we listen to what our life is saying through them?"

Donna VanLiere is a bestselling author and speaker. She has published many novels, including The Christmas Hope series. She has won numerous awards and speaks at countless events for women and families.

She lives in Tenessee with her husband and three children.

GIVEAWAY: I'm pleased to announce that we have 3 copies of Finding Grace to give away! Simply post a comment about why you think this book might help you, or someone you know and I'll pick three winners on June 1st. Good luck!