Hasses aren't only avocados.

Pater: The Resurrection of the Ice Capades

2021-02-23T08:01:00.001-05:00

In 1936, John H Harris, a Pittsburgh rink owner, hired the legendary skater Sonja Henie to perform between periods of ice hockey games. When he and other rink owners noticed the swelling crowds, they created an ice carnival that would entertain crowds in rinks across America. The Ice Capades were born.

The competing pulls of professional figure skating on the one hand and the emergence of Disney on Ice on the other hand, led to the Ice Capades ending their run in 1995. A couple revival attempts in 2000 and 2008 failed. And so all was done...until 2021.

The Hass Avocado Jnrs realised that while audiences were done with vaudevillian skating routines, they weren't done with fun and japes in the cold. So introducing the thoroughly modern Ice Capades for the 21st century!!!

Act I: There's snow place like home

The crowd are on their feet, the applause is deafening. Can this show get any better?

ACT II: Be careful, that's a slippery slope you're going down

The audience is crying with laugher. Never have they seen such antics! A chant has started, "More, more, more!"

ACT III: Going skating at night was a snow brainer

What a show! What a performance! From young to old, the audience are leaving the auditorium wanting more. The Avocado Juniors are busy preparing for the next big concert. But wait, the organisers want a word with Pater. Something about needing to clean up first...

Pater: 2020 - it was just a horrible dream

2020-12-31T20:08:00.004-05:00

Dear Avocado Juniors

When you look back on this year aka "2020 Hindsight Vision", Pater has no doubt you'll have very mixed emotions and wonder what to make of it all. The 3 Cs will come to mind; Cancel, Chaos and Quarantine (!). True, you all came closer together as we isolated through the Spring, Summer, Autumn and now the Winter, as a nuclear unit that thankfully did not go nuclear. But you also spent the time unable to attend summer camp, hug your grandmas, play freely with friends, or celebrate festivals and milestones with family. Globally, the world witnessed misery, sadness and a widening of divides across a myriad of spectrums. So the question remains how best to treat 2020, the year that never was? There have been pages and pages of editorials and blogposts, trying to understand, trying to explain, trying to rationalise this year. But perhaps the approach you all took was the best - sleep it off and pretend it never even happened (though some of you seemed to be better at this approach than others...).

On behalf of you slumbering Avocado Juniors, Pater will paraphrase the Bard and bid 2020 good night, good night, parting is not such sweet sorrow.

Love

Pater

Mater: Happy Birthday AJ2

2020-11-14T08:23:00.016-05:00

Happy Birthday, AJ2. But you should know that Mater is really mad with you. No, not because you teased AJ3&4. No, not because you lost yet another soccer ball. And no, not because you sang an inappropriate song with your best friends that reference farts and poo. Though we will come back to all of these at a later date! Mater is mad because you turned nine without her permission. How dare you! This is simply unacceptable behaviour that will not be tolerated! You're teaching your younger brothers bad habits like getting older. For example, now they think it's okay to stop being cute and start being handsome...

They also think it's okay to be a terrific son and grandson...

Pater even told me that you've been teaching them how to be an excellent sportsman. Grrrr.

And as for the example you set them on being a great friend? Simply unacceptable..

And really don't get me started on what they've picked up from you on being the best brother ever!

Oh this is super awkward. Pater just pointed out that perhaps, maybe, possibly, Mater is letting her emotions run riot. Something about being in denial that you're turning into a young man and no longer being Mater's little baby. Apparently, this is not a bad thing. It seems that all of the above would indicate you're an amazing son, grandson, brother and friend. Who would have thunk?! Mater's prepared to accept all of this on one condition, AJ2. Stop growing up so quickly! Mater's not ready for you to be an independent man or even the thought of it. Are you prepared to stay as Mater's young man for a few more years? You are? Okay good. Now that we've got that sorted out, let's get going to your birthday party (or two, since it's you AJ2!) before Mater changes her mind!

Happy Birthday, AJ2! Mater and Pater love you very much!

Pater: It's frustrating but not worth Falling out over

2020-10-29T15:42:00.010-04:00

Over the last decade, Mater and Pater have spent so much time encouraging social interaction in our Avocado Juniors, and then, bam, along comes a pandemic that insists on isolation. Since March, hanging out with friends and family has gone the way of the dodo. Suddenly, we had to come up with new, insular ways to fill that 48 hour period called the weekend. And if earlier this year Maters and Paters across the world were scratching their heads for ideas on how to entertain their children, they're now creating deep furrows in their skulls as Fall begins (and shuddering with fear on what to do in the Winter). Admittedly, some of our ideas have been a little odd, like spending a Saturday night hanging out in a pharmacy for over an hour as we waited for flu shots (never have we spent so much energy examining each and every aisle for a source of distraction):

Highlight of that particular fun night out was when AJ1 noticed the name of the street of the pharmacy...

Thankfully the unseasonably warm weather this year, has meant some of our outings having been more conventional and allowed us to experience the true beauty of Toronto in the Fall. Starting with our annual apple picking trip...

...then a hike along the leaf-strewn trails of Toronto...

But perhaps the highlight of our Fall sojourns was watching the annual salmon run. Pater has been in Toronto for 12 years and has never heard of this and even when he did this month for the first time, would not have believed it if he hadn't seen it. Who would have imagined it possible to live in a city where you can watch salmon migrate upstream, jumping up small waterfalls, all in order to lay their eggs in the shallows before winter settles! Not the remote rivers of Canada, Scotland or Norway but a city!!! What an amazing feat of nature and how wonderfully remarkable to be able to view it within an urban jungle. And you Avocado Juniors, as well as hundred of Torontonians, thought so too!

Okay, so how exactly do you beat something as amazing as that? Salmon literally killing themselves to get from the Great Lakes to their breeding grounds upstream! Impossible. So Pater didn't try. Go big or go home? Pater went home!

And if, during all this backyard tomfoolery, Pater happened to also get his garden cleaned up for the winter, then so much the better...

COVID has caused a lot of disruption in our lives, but the Avocado Hasses aren't going to let a global pandemic crimp our style when it comes to the Canadian Fall!!!

Mater: Happy Birthday to our Princess

2020-09-25T22:31:00.031-04:00

As each year passes AJ1, Mater watches your development into a beautiful young woman with awe. How is it possible that we created such a such a funny, clever, beautiful, creative, sensitive, caring daughter?

Oh and did Mater mention sporty?

Or that your an amazing granddaughter, cousin and friend?

This past year in particular, with the trials of COVID forcing a whole new dynamic and a lot more family time, you have come even closer to your brothers and proven yourself to be the best big sister we always knew you would be.

Sorry that the restrictions of the pandemic prevented us from throwing you a big party with all your friends and larger family, but that didn't stop us from still celebrating!

Happy Birthday AJ1! Mater, Pater and all your Avocado brothers love you very much!!!!

Pater: Happy 50th Birthday Uncle Tel Aviv

2020-08-01T21:30:00.000-04:00

August 1st is a pretty historical day. It was on August 1st that Christopher Columbus became the first European to step foot on what is now Venezuala (1498), George I became King (1714), Britain and Ireland joined in union to become the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Ireland (1800), Colorado became the 38th State (1876), the German Empire declared war on the Russian Empire (1914), the Warsaw Uprising broke out (1944), Islamabad becomes the capital of Pakistan (1960). And then August 1st 1970 arrived.

The world was a smaller place in 1970. About half as big as it is now, to be precise, with 3,712,697,742 people in it. And on August 1st it became 3,712,697,743 with the birth of Uncle Tel Aviv (within the sounds of Bow Bells according to him; in Bearsted Hospital according to official records).

And thirty nine year later began a very special relationship between Uncle Tel Aviv and you Avocado Juniors, starting with AJ1...

...then AJ2...

...then AJ3...

...and finally AJ4...

So from all us Avocado Hasses in Canada, we're sending hugs, kisses and best wishes for your 50th birthday, Uncle Tel Aviv! We love you lots and hope you have an amazing day and an even better year. Hit it Avocado Juniors:

Pater: Messin' about on the river

2020-07-29T19:36:00.023-04:00

There are super famous singers, who stay in the minds and hearts of fans well after they exit stage left from the concert stadium of life. And then there are completely unknown singers, whose only claim to fame is a couple lines that randomly stick in the mind of random people. Josh MacRae was such a singer and of the three singles he released (none of which got higher than #15 in the charts), one had the following lines which played repeatedly through Pater's head like a scratched record, this summer:

When the weather is fine, you know it's the time

For messin' about on the river

If you take my advice, there's nothing so nice

As messin' about on the river

(Evidently the song also stuck in the mind of Terry Jones of Monty Python fame, since he had Rat sing it at the beginning of his equally terribly-received 1996 film adaptation of Wind in the Willows).

But what caused this blink-and-you-missed-it verse to penetrate the thick skull of Pater's noggin? With COVID precluding a normal summer of camp, day trips, and close proximity with friends and family, Mater reached out to Uncle Toronto to ask him if we could make use of his cottage, which he graciously agreed to. And so off we went, the car packed to the hilt, the Avocado Jnrs squeezed in alongside food, clothes, toys and enough equipment to satisfy a sherpa about to climb Sagarmatha.

And once we were arrived, 5 years after our previous stay when only three Avocado Juniors were in the world, Mater and Pater started questioning each other as to why we didn't frequent cottage country more often. Was it fear of traffic? The hassle of packing and unpacking? Horse fly as big as your fist? Or just life in a normal city with a plethora of normal activities to do on a hot summer day meant we were happy to stay in Toronto? Whatever it was, within a couple hours of arriving, we went native and fell back in love with the peace and tranquility of messin' about on (and next to) the river. Ok, ok, Pater knows it's a lake, but poetic license folks!

And it wasn't just the water that the Avocado Jnrs fell in love with...

After long days spent messin' about on the river, what better than marshmallows and smores around the firepit?

Well maybe an outdoor movie at night?

We had such a relaxing, rejuvenating time eatin', swimmin', boatin' and messin' about in cottage country! Thanks Uncle and Aunty Toronto!

p.s. the sunsets were UNBELIEVABLE!!!

Pater: AJ4 turns 4!!!

2020-06-13T22:30:00.004-04:00

Happy Birthday, AJ4! You are becoming such a funny, intelligent, happy, friendly little man. We love watching your very distinct personality standing out in a busy household and a crowded group of Avocado Juniors.

In any family, the youngest child can sometimes be swallowed up in the business of life, overshadowed by older siblings who are inventing, creating and achieving new milestones on a daily basis, while the youngest is left to repeat goals already accomplished once, twice and thrice. Yes, you also benefit from having more laid back parents, who have tried and tested fear, worry and angst on your older siblings and can now relax and give you more freedom. But that's just further reason for why a youngest child can be ignored and overlooked, becoming the quiet kid who finds expression in whatever's leftover from their siblings. But not you, AJ4! Oh no. You defy that stereotype and grab life by the horns, making sure everyone knows who's in charge. And whether it's achieving the new or repeating the old, you successfully layer your very distinct personality and make it your own. Is that the reason we love you so much?

Or is it because you are so adorable with your best friend?

Or because you're so good at helping in the garden (okay, so maybe that's just something Pater appreciates)?

Or because you're just so darn cute?

Or because you play hard...

...eat hard...

...and rest hard?

Could it be because, despite the COVID-induced home schooling, you're such a diligent and ace student?

Or even because you love your family so much?

So do Mater and Pater love you to the moon because you're the youngest, or the funniest, or the cutest, or any other superlative adjectives? Nah, that was just an excuse to fill this birthday post with lots of photos of you! We love you...because you're you! Happy Birthday AJ4!!!

Mater: Four mischief makers

2020-05-26T13:23:00.000-04:00

Don't worry, my Avocado Juniors, Mater's not besmirching your good (!) names. Nor has your Mater added to our little brood of Avocados (calm down Pater!). But another Mater has brought four little mischief makers into our lives. And for now, we're loving having them around. For now!

In addition to being a great distraction during the quarantine of Covid, it's been remarkable watching them grow. Some are boisterous and brave. Others more tepid and tentative. Not unlike you Avocado Juniors. And Mama Raccy (as named by AJ4) is definitely constantly on guard at all times, making sure no one harms her babies, while also giving them just enough freedom to make mistakes and learn from them. Not unlike your own Mater. (There's been no sign of Papa Raccy, but Mater's not making any inferences or connections there!)

Welcome to the Avocado Family, baby Raccies. Enjoy your (hopefully temporary) stay!

Pater: HBD AJ3!!!

2020-04-23T21:45:00.000-04:00

Happy Birthday, AJ3! At six years old you are becoming such a handsome young boy, full of energy, a cheeky smile always on your face, constantly curious, in love with reading, and a weird obsession with animal shows...

You always seem to get the short end of the stick when it comes to birthdays, not least because we are usually in Florida for Pesach and so throwing a full party for you (with all your friends, a super hero, and loot bags that seem to cost more than the party itself) is impossible. And yet, you never complain or get upset. It could be because a birthday in a hotel with your larger family and a swimming pool is a pretty great alternative! It could also be that you're a classic middle child, who is agreeable and doesn't like to make a fuss (unlike certain other Avocado Juniors, ahem...). But whatever the reason, the COVID lockdown has not only kept us in Toronto, but also ensured that you got to celebrate multiple times.

There was your morning celebration with your siblings, a plethora of Bakugon (don't ask; no idea) and a special message from your favourite, Hollywood movie stars in the whole wide world ever ...

...then there was a celebration with your class via Zoom...

...and again during a Lego party with your posse...

...and again with your larger family...

...and, because you only turn six once, one more party in the night...

Five was definitely a great year for you, AJ3....

...but Pater has a feeling that six will be even better! Happy Birthday, AJ3!!!!

Mater and Pater love you lots!

Mater: The Spring of COVID

2020-03-31T02:02:00.000-04:00

Dear Avocado Juniors

Years from now, you'll look back and remember an unprecedented, somewhat surreal Carolesque-time, when we socially distanced from the people we loved...

...Zoom no longer just meant going fast...

...Pater had to learn a new skill (quickly!) ...

...exercise became restricted to the confines of our homestead and surrounding area...

...and going into a bank with a mask on was greeted with a smile and not a call to the cops. Our nuclear unit became ever so more nuclear and most definitely a unit, as we stayed home to protect against a virus no one had ever heard of six months ago but suddenly had an intimate knowledge of, courtesy of an incessantly and hourly sharing of medical opinions, memes, YouTube clips, newspaper articles etc etc.

It was a time of fear. Stepping out of the house required Purell, a medical mask and gloves...

...not to mention a regime of not touching ones face, washing hands post-trip for the time it takes to sing happy birthday twice, and always wondering who came close to you at any point during the time it took to go out and buy a carton of milk.

But it was also a time of family bonding. We became each other's best friends, social circle and distraction, closer than we've ever been while staying within the four walls of our castle. Mater and Pater couldn't be prouder nor grateful for the way you've adapted to everything, whether it was schooling from home...

...channeling your creativity in new directions...

...cooking and eating...

...playing with each other inside....

...and out...

And we have to give extra thanks for the wonderful people at Apple...

...not to mention Lego!!!

But most of all we have to thank God for keeping you, our precious Avocado Juniors, as well as all our family and loved ones safe from harm. It's been a very weird Spring, the repercussions for which will be written about, dissected, theorized and remembered for many years to come. But, whatever history decides, we will always be grateful that we got to spend quality, inspirational time with the four most wonderful children in the whole world.

Love Mater

Pater: Timeless even after all this time

2020-02-23T15:29:00.000-05:00

What is it about Disney that makes it so timeless? With rare exception, everyone who comes in contact with the movies and the characters loses themselves in the innocence, in the wonder, in the enchantment. And they continue to do so regardless of age, gender or culture. But why? Is it because, while lots of films provide an escape from reality, few also teach us to believe in magic, overcoming hardship, and pure, basic kindness? Or is it because, while lots of movie characters capture our attention in the moment, few manage to do so for decades after we first saw the film? Maybe. Probably. But how? They can't be that good!

Pater think it's because Disney knows this feeling of timelessness also needs work on our part. We have to believe that a beauty will fall in love with a beast, that an evil usurper to the throne will not prevail, that a girl can lose her parents and battle the odds to become a queen. And we need to do it whether we're 7 or 70. So, beyond the movies, Disney works darn hard to create physical locations of magic and wonder on land and sea that we can visit and revisit, each time allowing us to recharge our childhood awe and wonder at the timelessness of the Disney message of innocence and joy.

How do Pater and Mater know this? Because five years after successfully suspending a life time of honestly-gained adult cynicism, during a week on the ocean waves with AJ1-3, Grandma London and our favourite childhood heroes, we did it all over again in February. And guess what? The second we stepped onto the boat we were hit with a shot to the arm of pure Disney captivation, and by the end of the cruise, our belief batteries were recharged. What could be better? Well definitely experiencing it with an additional Avocado Junior who wasn't around the first time (#4), not to mention Grandma Toronto, Aunty Toronto and two Cousins Toronto!!!

And as with all things Disney, there were new experiences, new memories, new magic for us to enjoy together and remember for ever...

...but there was also timelessness, that warm fuzzy feeling of good memories being revisited, the old magic working it's spell over us five years later and still being as strong as it was then...

Timeless even after all this time? Breathtakingly so!

Mater: Oopsie, no more poopsie!

2020-01-14T21:02:00.000-05:00

Dear Pampers

We are writing to thank you for everything you’ve done for our Avocado Juniors over the last 10 years. However, as of last night, we no longer require your services.

Please don't take it personally; it's not you, it's us - after pooping and peeing through 32,000 diapers(day time, night, time, swimming and humorous ones worn on the head), the Avocado Juniors are all finally toilet trained 24/7.

So it’s time to call it quits. Please don’t take offence but since we’ve spent nearly $10,000 on crap, we think our time is done.

Many thanks for everything
Mater and Pater

P.s. please pass on our apologies to the environment for the aforementioned 32,000 diapers now sitting in landfills, decomposing at a rate of 500 years per diaper.

Pater: Four they're jolly good fellows

2020-01-05T16:00:00.000-05:00

Four they're jolly good fellows

And nobody can deny

(Certainly not Pater or Mater!)

Pater: Wondering Avocado Juniors

2019-12-31T20:01:00.000-05:00

The Book of Exodus teaches us how for 40 years the Jewish People wondered in the wilderness after leaving Egypt. Imagine all the packing and unpacking! After a December of multiple travels, I think the Avocado Hasses understand how they must have felt. Though with less sand in all our belongings.

First there was Mater and Pater's trip to Sao Paulo, Brazil and the Atlantic Rainforest...

...we barely had time to unpack before the Avocado Hasses split up, with Mater, AJ1, AJ2 and AJ4 flying to Florida, to spend time with Grandma, uncles and aunts and cousins Toronto, the pool, tennis and Candytopia...

...and Pater and AJ3 flew to London to spend time with Uncle and Aunt Tel Aviv and cousins London, no pool but lots of rain, and a whole ton of tourist sites like the London Eye, the Aquarium, London Zoo, Madam Tussauds, Buckingham Palace, Trafalgar Square, tour bus, boat ride on the Thames, The Queen's Gallery (where AJ3 was OBSESSED with listening to the guide for EVERY art piece), Big Ben, Downing Street, the Natural History Museum, Tower Bridge and Tower of London, and a million other places...

One might think that after all that travelling that a rest would be in order. One might think that. But we didn't. Less than 12 hours after arriving back in Toronto, Pater and AJ3 were back on a plane, for La Grande Reunion...

Sure, there was another week after that, with swimming, donuts, a visit to a slime factory (no comment), donuts, chanukah lights, presents and fun, fun, fun. But nothing was better than the hug that AJ3 got from the other Avocado Juniors when they met up after a week of separation. A month of planes, trains, (boats) and automobiles were worth it just for that hug.

Mater: Happy Birthday AJ2!!!

2019-11-14T23:02:00.000-05:00

You know AJ2, as we celebrate your 8th birthday, it's amazing how you've proven Pater wrong. Oh how Mater laughs, when she remembers him claiming when you were aged 2, that you'd end up in borstal by now. Not that Mater really knew what that is or why he would every make such an outrageous claim. Even when you had repeated and major tantrums. Mater certainly never thought that. Never. Ever. And Pater is choking in the corner right now for reasons that have nothing to do with the last statement...

...anyways, as Mater was saying, Happy Birthday AJ2, you have turned into the most amazing, handsome, funny, clever young man...

...avid sportsman...

...experienced traveler...

...best bud...

...family favorite...

...a great bro...

...and a son who we are so very very proud of...

...happy birthday AJ2. And to the Pater who thought he'd be celebrating with you through thick glass during a juve visiting session...

Mater: When a crib isn't just a crib

2019-11-10T23:50:00.002-05:00

A crib note is a brief reminder, written in a concealable place as an aid to memory. Cribbing is copying another person's work without their acknowledgement. Crib biters are inveterate grumblers...okay, okay so maybe Mater is obsessing on a certain item of furniture that's been part of our lives for ten years...

...and maybe said piece of furniture was dismantled today to make room for a Big Boy Bed for AJ4 (with a little help from him and AJ2)...

...and maybe, just maybe, Mater is projecting the sadness that her Avocado Juniors are no longer babies, onto said furniture. After all, changing-tables become desks, rocking chairs become comfy reading chairs, and diapers and milk bottles are not memories any Mater wants to hold onto. But a crib's sole purpose is for babies. No baby, no crib. So once that symbol is disassembled, dismantled, razed and undone, Mater can no longer deny the reality that her babies are no longer babies, but rather adults-in-training who will be leaving home in a blink of an eye. But what is the alternative? Keeping them as babies always? Putting them back into the crib, figuratively speaking? Or even literally speaking as well...

No, time to let them grow up. The Avocado Juniors will always be our babies, even if Mater and Pater can't lift them up and cuddle them whenever we want. And a crib is just a piece of furniture that we will always associate with the good memories of the formative years of each of the AJs. But we now need to make space for the next piece of furniture that will help us make memories. So out with the crib and in with the Big Boy Bed...

Now if only Mater can get the oh-so-nostalgic AJ1 to also let go of the past...

Pater: Grandmas Rule!!!

2019-11-03T09:09:00.000-05:00

Remember when Rudy Giuliani was the highly regarded Mayor of New York? Well back in the good old days, he came up with some real doozies, like: What children need most are the essentials that grandmas provide in abundance. They give unconditional love, kindness, patience, humour, comfort, lessons in life. And, most importantly, cookies. Well Rudy's street cred may have dipped since then but his wisdom certainly hasn't, as you Avocado Juniors can all attest to:

We are so grateful to have two amazing grandmothers who live nearby, who are such an important part in your lives and who both have a solid rule that what happens at grandma's, stays at grandma's!

You all know that your grandmas never run out of hugs, kisses, tissues and any-occasion-presents!

Who else provides you with love, kisses and an abundance of patience as you slowwwwwwly tell a story? Who else ignores all the terrible things Pater and Mater do because they are so enchanted with the wonderful things you do?

We love how your grandmothers are a little bit parent, a little bit teacher and a lot of bit best friend to you all. We are so amazed seeing at how they have gone from holding your little hands when you were younger to having a firm grip on your hearts now that you're older.

Thank you to the most wonderful grandmas in the whole wide world for being the best. For always being up for an adventure. For always knowing your way around the library and lego store in equal measure. For always having patience. For always being the best audience. For always being thrilled to see the stickiest of children. For always enjoying snuggling up for a book, tv show or just a snuggle. For always making sure that every day you spend with your grandchildren is special. For always buying the best treats at the movies. But most of all, for always loving your grandchildren unconditionally.

AJs: The big Four Zero

2019-10-29T07:00:00.000-04:00

Dear Mater

Its hard to believe that it's been forty years since you were a baby...

...you've grown into such an amazing mater over that time. We all think you're the best daughter....

....best granddaughter...

...best sister...

...best aunt...

....best friend...

...best traveler...

...best camper...

...best best-friend...

...best wife...

But most of all, you are the best, funniest, cleverest, most loving Mater in the whole wide world. Ever!

Happy 40th Birthday, Mater!!!

All our love, the Hass Avocado Juniors xoxo

Mater: Start spreading the news...

2019-09-25T22:55:00.000-04:00

10 years! A decade! Two whole hands! Start spreading the news!!!

Dear AJ1 - our first Avocado Junior! - can you believe that you are leaving behind the single digits and entering the "tween" years? Can Mater believe that you are leaving behind the single digits and entering the "tween" years? No, no Mater cannot. It seems like just yesterday that you were the avocado (junior) in my belly! And let's not even discuss how many years Mater is ringing in (hint: it starts with a four and ends with an orty).

So really the only way to deal with the denial of these two major milestones was to pack up our bags and take a once in a lifetime (or, if Mater can have her way, an annual) trip to The Big Apple! Of course we couldn't go anywhere without branding our trip "10-40" and getting some snazzy swag to mark the occasion.

But then we were all set. See ya, AJs 2, 3 and 4! And Pater!

Seeing your face light up to see New York for the first time was something I wont forget. Fine, we had to get past the airport construction and graffiti to see the beauty, but Mater thinks she did pretty good choosing the hotel with the pink chandelier and funky rooftop pool! Mater *may* also have told the hotel about our special celebrations and they decided to spoil us rotten!

First stop: central park (riding on the subway to get there)! And some life lessons: parking a row boat is harder than it looks and not all zoos are created equal. But we'll tell Pater we loved it anyway. And save the entrance ticket for the scrap book not to worry!

After the long first day in the sun, thinking we were too exhausted to walk one more second - we find ourselves in front of FAO Schwartz. And just like that you are a kid in a toy store running around with your head spinning from wonder and amazement! Pace yourself, AJ1!

Next stop: The Vessel, Hudson Yards (aka the place that houses Dyllans Candy Bar), The Highline, Soho (aka shopping), the Camp store (by far your favourite place!), a little post-day swim and dinner with Cousins New York (where we may have lied and told them it was your actual birthday!).

Lets not forget the epic day at the Statue of Liberty (a first for Mater too!), Wall Street, Ground Zero and some more shopping. Mater also got to live out her dream to go to the US Open - it may not have been your first choice, but you were a trooper so thank you for that!

We did manage to pack in some museums (wow, Camp exhibit, just wow) and, wait for it...more shopping! And then the highlight of the trip - Mean Girls the musical - but don't get any ideas because you are not allowed to be a mean girl! And, also, I'll explain those words you asked about during the show when you are older...

Alas, it was time to say goodbye (we will miss you Target!)! It was truly a trip Mater will never forget. And I hope it was for you too, AJ1. Happy birthday to my most amazing one and only little girl, my mini-me, the one that made me a mom, and the funnest travel companion a girl could ask for (sorry Pater!).

Until next year, NYC!

Pater: Celebrating ten years!!!

2019-08-24T22:00:00.000-04:00

Ten years ago today, we started this blog as a way for you, our Avocado Juniors, to know why we did what we did when we did. In that time, we have published 180 posts which have been viewed 24,000 times by people in Canada, America, Israel, Europe and surprisingly enough, Japan and South Korea, all of which has raised revenue of $64 towards the Hass Avocado Endowment Fund (would it have killed any of you 24,000 viewers to click on the ads just once???).

Over the last ten years, our family has seen the births of 4 amazing Avocado Juniors; celebrated 24 Avocado Junior birthday parties officially (unofficially the number is probably closer to 50; AJ2, J'accuse!); thought up 10 different Purim costume themes; rejected 43 bad Purim costume themes; experienced 3 snips at ages 8 days and 3 years (different parts of the body, all male, we promise); sadly lost 2 much loved and much missed grandfathers; traveled to numerous countries, quite often without throwing up mid-route; and enjoyed a mixture of laughter, tears, harmony, diapers, fights, homework, chaos, and sheer, unadulterated love.

But in an age of show not tell, pictures not words, simplicity not complexity, how to express all that we've done and all the changes over ten years? Pater has really struggled with this and since Mater is too busy planning for her upcoming trip with AJ1 to New York (see next month's blogpost), the task fell on his narrow shoulders. What do all the Avocado Juniors have in common over a multi-year period, that pictorially ties them together and can be used to express a Hollywood-style collage of time? We have lots of repeating themes but not stretching over ten years. And then bingo, Pater got it. True, the answer says as much about the strange inner workings of Pater's mind, as it does about the growth of our family, but here goes:

Traditionally, ten year anniversaries are celebrated with Tin. Tin makes up 12% of bronze and is used to strengthen its resistance to corrosion. Our favourite place in the world is Toronto Zoo, which in a busy world of school, work, hockey lessons, karate classes and so many disparate activities, some would say (mainly Pater) strengthens our familial bonds, preventing us from corroding as a nuclear unit. Don't worry if it's not making sense yet. Nearly there! So how better to describe in pictures the last 10 years than through our interactions with the famous bronze statues in Toronto Zoo...

Thank you to Messrs. Orangutan and Komodo Dragon, and all the amazing people at Toronto Zoo for running the best place in the world filled with simplicity, wide open space, fresh air and, most importantly, a space free of flashing light, beeping sounds, expensive trinkets and all things technology. Oh and the animals are pretty darn amazing too.

But a bigger thanks to our four Avocado Juniors who, over the last ten years, have each etched a special place in the hearts of their Mater and Pater, not to mention their grandparents, family, friends and every person they meet. You are all growing up so fast, and while we wish we could halt time, we're also looking forward to seeing what the next ten years holds for each of you. And whether you'll still sit on the komodo dragon or orangutan when you're 18 while Pater takes a photo for this blog!

Happy 10th anniversary to the hassesarentonlyavocados blog and thank you to the four key participants who made it possible. We love you now and for ever, with or without a zoo membership.

Mater: The Camp Moshava Saga continues

2019-07-31T22:14:00.000-04:00

It's hard to believe that what started over twenty years ago with Mater and Pater meeting at Camp Moshava Ennismore...

(note the freshly painted bench with red tractor rims - Pater's creation at camp)

...and a brief re-visit 10 years ago...

(remember the bench...)

...and then again 8 and 9 years ago...

(the bench is still there)

...has led to the much anticipated, nerve wrecking (for adults and children alike), momentous rite of passage for AJ1 and Cousin Toronto who are going to Camp Moshava!!!!! Of course, before any girl can spend four weeks in the wilderness, her Mater has to take her shopping (those bags won't fill themselves)...

With AJ1 finally ready to go camp (though it would take Pater at least another week before he was ready), the amazing day arrived. And after a few tears (again, Pater), AJ1 and Cousin Toronto were off...

AJ1 and her friends drove through the hallowed, wooden gates of Camp and the fun began and never seemed to end...

(Pater's Bench is still there!!!)

Yup, fireworks, sports, woodwork, ropes course, art, a beehive (what!!!!), farm animals, technology, learning, singing and all with an amazing group of friends. What could make the experience better?

At her first ever sleep-away camp, when her parents were constantly worried about how she would manage being away from home for 4 weeks but were reassuring themselves that she was grown up and knew how to look after herself, yes that self-same AJ1 went and fractured her arm! Pater was ready to fly in a surgeon but was persuaded that AJ1 was just fine despite her arm being in a sling...

But Pater was not still not sure. His little princess was away from home, her arm hanging from its socket (apparently...) and by God, he was going to make sure she was okay. So he threw your brothers in the car and drove us to Ennismore...

...and even got the rest of the family to come for Visiting Day...

Admittedly, the multiple visits had another ulterior motive. Mater, Pater and AJ1 all love Camp Moshava Ennismore to the moon and back. But we needed to make sure AJ2, 3 & 4 were bitten by the same bug (aka camp mosquito and blackfly). So Camp Moshava Ennismore introduced them to a couple fun things at the lake...

...a bit of a splash at the pool...

...one or two lovable, furry animals...

...archery!!!! What?!!!!...

...explore their artistic side...

...and basically introduced them to the most important places in Camp, starting of course with...

It's not official, but the boys may have agreed to sign up for 6 weeks next camp. As for AJ1's plans for next summer? True there were smiles when she got off the bus and discovered her bedroom had been reorganized (and not been taken over by her stinky brothers)...

...but something tells me she may want to be back next year...

Thank you to Vicky and all the amazing staff at Camp Moshava for ensuring our AJ1 had the first of many amazing experiences at the camp we love and owe so much to...

Pater: A cut above the rest

2019-06-13T13:37:00.000-04:00

Happy Birthday, AJ4! Pater has to write this post because Mater is in her bed crying. Neither of us can believe you're three already! Pater is, however, taking the news better than Mater who remembers this...

...and isn't prepared to deal with the fact that you are now such a big, independent boy, with a crazy crop of curly blonde hair...

In fact, she was so angst-ridden by the thought of losing her little baby, that your upsherin, the first haircut some Jews only give their boys on their third birthday, was more of a figurative haircut than a literal one. Here was the before...

...during the "hair cut"...

...and well, um, how does Pater put this accurately? After?...

It was almost like a Spot the Difference competition! Mater was adamant that the blonde curls remain, and since the alternative was Mater retiring to a dark room and crying herself into a tizzy as she mourned the loss of youth in general and yours in particular, who were any of us to argue?!!! So while you still remain a cut above the rest, AJ4, your hair was not!

Happy Birthday, AJ4! We all love you very much!!!

Mater: Good old Napoleon

2019-05-22T23:19:00.000-04:00

Mater realizes that praising a long dead French general is not the typical way to start a blog post concerning four beautiful Avocado Juniors, but he deserves it for demanding "show me a family of readers and I will show you the people who move the world." Anyone who knows Mater will also know she loves a challenge! So here you go, Monsieur Bonaparte...

He may have met his Waterloo in the end, but in the matter of reading, old Bonaparte had it spot on. Bien Sur!

Pater: The ultimate 5 year old!!!

2019-04-23T21:57:00.000-04:00

Happy Birthday to our beautiful AJ3!!!

What a crazy fun year you've had! So how should we have celebrated your birthday? A quiet affair? Birthday cake with just your immediate family? Well some may claim that middle children are overlooked, ignored, bypassed. But our third Avocado Junior is not just any middle child and so his celebration would not be quiet. Oh no! It needed a flash and a bang, that started with a trip to Florida for Passover with all your family...

The only thing that could make your birthday better would be a splash of Dash...

Happy 5th Birthday, AJ3. Mater and Pater love your independence, crazy dances, spontaneity, warm hugs, laughter, wiggly eyebrows, intelligence and handsome face very much!!!