One of those events took place five years ago today. On this day five years ago, Simon – a friend of mine who I had known as long as I can remember – took his life. On that day, we lost one of our best.

I think that everyone who has lost a friend or family member to suicide tells a familiar tale. We’ll talk of how unexpected it was and wonder what we could have done to prevent such a terrible thing from taking place. We’ll speak of them fondly, remembering them as wonderful friends who enjoyed a laugh and shared many good times with us. To the outside observer, our recollections may seem trite and cliche, but I can promise that all of the good things said about Simon by those of us who knew him are one hundred percent true.

Given the closeness of our families, growing up Simon was akin to something between a cousin and a little brother to me, though being far more adventurous than I, he was certainly the leader on our expeditions in the great outdoors. We did however share the storytelling duties during some truly epic imaginary adventures in Legoland starring our avatars, me as the Chief of Police and him as…well, I guess “Super Special Agent Extraordinaire” is the best way of putting it. In any case, our characters were brothers and headed up an undefeatable police force that always took down the bad guys and saved the day.

So many fun times through the years. Computer gaming fun with Mortal Kombat, Monkey Island, Doom and Commander Keen. Treks through the bush, playing Spotlight with the whole gang at night. Discovering the creepiest Con the Fruiterer talking doll in existence. Fishing out at the bay. The aforementioned Lego adventures. Many, many fond memories that I treasure.

As we got a little older, we kind of went our separate ways and didn’t see each other as often, yet whenever we did it was just like old times: lots of laughs, quoting our favourite Simpsons episodes or just talking about whatever. I believe that’s a sign of true friendship and as fine an example as any of the fantastic person that Simon was. It didn’t matter if months or even years had passed since our last meeting, we picked up right where we left off.

I’ll never forget the day I found out about his passing; the shock and disbelief, the staggering sense of loss and the myriad of questions running through my mind. I don’t think any of us who knew him will forget the moment we found out, nor the week that followed it as we came together to farewell him.

However, that’s not how I choose to remember Simon. As well as all those fond memories from our childhood, I remember the last two times I saw him: his 21st birthday, where we reminisced and cracked jokes, and one lazy afternoon just watching TV and eating Doritos, two old friends with nothing better to do than spend some time together and riff on Sunday arvo programming.

As I mentioned before, Simon’s suicide was one of the events that ultimately put things in perspective and helped me get to a point where I wanted to seek help and get better. While I’ve never been suicidal, I’ve certainly experienced my share of low points before and after that terrible day and it demonstrated to me what can possibly happen when someone finds themselves in a really bad place that they feel they can’t escape. I can definitely say it was a motivating factor in wanting to turn things around.

It’s also a reason I want to write a book about positivity and self-improvement. Too many fine young people are ending their lives because they feel troubled and trapped; knowing what it’s like to lose a person who obviously felt that way, I’d like to do my part in curbing those numbers.

Simon was certainly a significant factor in my decision to undergo self-improvement, change my outlook and fight negativity tooth and nail. I only wish that it had come about differently, that he could have overcome his troubles as well and be with us today. I think about him quite often but especially on a day like today, five years to the day that we lost him. Not just as a catalyst for my journey these past four years though, for he was much, much more than that; he was as fine a human being as they come, one we lost far too soon. On the bright side of course, we did have him.

Rest in peace, Simon. We love you, miss you, and thank you for all that you were and you did. We’ll certainly never forget you.

To keep myself motivated, I printed out checklists for the four stages of my exercise routine: the 5 km run, the weights, the sit-ups and the push-ups. As I completed each stage, I’d tick the appropriate box. It’s hardly a revolutionary concept, but it’s definitely effective as it means every day’s workout has a tangible result. Getting in shape isn’t an overnight process, despite what fad diets would have you believe, so being able to look at a piece of paper and see that you’ve put in a good effort tides you over while you wait for the scales to register fewer kilos and your clothes to get loose.

Whenever I missed a day or couldn’t complete a particular stage – something that seems so foreign to me, these days – I’d put a dash in the box. As 2010 drew to a close, I was starting to get in pretty good shape but I wasn’t pleased seeing dashes in those boxes. I wanted to find a way to push myself even harder and take things to the next level. After taking a couple of days off to end the year, I decided that coming out of the gate in 2011, I’d complete my exercise checklist every single day, for as many days straight as I could.

From late October through the first two weeks of November in 2010, I’d managed a streak of sixteen days. On January 17th 2011, I edged out that mark. At that point, my goal was to keep the streak going through until the end of the month and then see what happened. What happened is it kept going as the months went by and new goals presented themselves. 100 days in a row, six months, 200 days, 300 days, a whole year…each milestone was passed with the streak unbroken.

Last year as I was coming up on my 500th consecutive day, a friend and I were joking about how long it would go since after all, it was “only half way to 1000″! Of course, that ultimately threw another long term goal out there and I resolved that yes, I’d try to make that happen. And here I am today, 75% of the way to reaching that goal.

My times for the 5 km run have gotten steadily better as the years have gone by, with my best being 17:39 set last October. Since mid July 2012, I’ve managed to keep my time below 20 minutes every day. Somehow, I don’t think I’ll ever challenge the world records for a 5 km run – seriously, those folks are superhuman! – but I’m pleased with the times that I’m getting, the streak I’ve built and the results it has had in terms of fitness and weight loss.

I’ve been asked how I do it, by friends, family and even people around the neighbourhood who have seen me running. It’s a little hard to give a definitive answer to that, at this point it’s something that I just do. I like to say that the first 31 days were hard and the rest have been easy, but that’s not being entirely truthful. Some days, it’s tougher than others…especially if I’ve partied a little hearty the night before.

The results I’ve achieved are definitely a motivating factor. The idea of being able to beat my best times also keeps me going. The encouragement I’ve received from friends, family and yes, those folks from the neighbourhood has certainly helped. I put together playlists of music that pump me up and keep the pace going, changing them up every so often to keep things fresh. I’m unquestionably addicted to the exercise high.

But on top of all that, I like the feeling of ticking those boxes every day, knowing that I’ve done something so healthy and positive for myself and seeing the proof right there on the paper. It’s driven me to run and exercise for 750 days and counting, and I know it can take me all the way to 1000…and beyond.

Top Ten Times for 5 km (as of January 19th, 2013)

1. 17:39
2. 17:49
3. 18:06
4. 18:18
5. 18:24
6. 18:27
7. 18:33
8. 18:34
9. 18:35 (twice)
10. 18:36

Ahem.

Well, at any rate, welcome to my new blog. As I mention in the About page, I’ll be posting thoughts and commentary on various subjects of interest to me…you know, the usual blog stuff. One of those interests is self-improvement, something I’ve been putting a considerable amount of effort into for the past four years. It’s been such a positive experience for me and as such, I’m currently trying to write a book that I hope can help others improve their own lives and state of mind.

Although I’ve always enjoyed writing (and I like to think I’ve been fairly decent at it), it’s been a difficult task so far. I’ve had the idea for a while now but in all the planning, the style and concept has changed a few times. At this time, I believe I’ve settled on an approach that will work, so I guess all that’s left to do is to write it (gee, is that all?). So that’s what I’m setting out to do.

As such, in addition to sending thoughts on my favourite subjects out to the World Wide Web, I’m hoping that this blog can serve as a tool to help out with writer’s block, as well as keep me on-track and held accountable in my efforts to write the book.

Fitness has also become a passion of mine and I’m in the midst of a lengthy streak of running 5 km and exercising every day, so I expect I’ll be posting a few updates on that at least every now and again. To be honest I’m quite proud of it, it’s been an important part of my self-improvement these past few years. Its results are easily the most noticeable change to the people around me, but it’s actually what I’ve been able to do with my mind that I’m truly stoked about. Getting fit feels great, but a more peaceful and focused mind makes day-to-day life much more pleasant and enjoyable.

Anyway, I’ll be talking more about that in future posts. For now, that’s enough of a dry, “welcome to my blog” post (but again, welcome to my blog!); stay tuned for all the opinions and hand-wringing over attempts at authorship that are fit to post!